• Lucid Dreaming - Dream Views




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    1. A fragment after a mantra | [23.06.2019]

      by , 06-23-2019 at 07:21 PM (Draeger's Dream Journal and Documentation)
      FNaF + school + Doctor Who + ...¹
      ²I remember being in my old primary school, about first or second grade. I am one of the children, seemingly coming from another class because I had to be assigned a new place to sit, a kid changing seats to the one next to him to let me sit there. I place down my bag at my new sitting place and listen to the female teacher.
      It seems we will go to visit.. something having to do with the Five Nights at Freddy's animatronic 'Circus Baby', according to what she says. Can't exactly remember what she says, though.

      The dream is skipping to our teacher going down to check on the animatronic, opening a chamber with a hissing noise as a sort of white smoke came out of it and it revealed the chamber to be a metallic, dark and blue tube with Circus Baby standing in the middle, the tube just large enough to fit her in. Upon looking into the chamber, the teacher started to scream as Circus Baby activated.

      Scene change to a bar, restaurant or some sort of store standing in a forest, the teacher laying motionless in front of it. I know that she fell from a hole in the sky. I am suddenly inside the store and an unfriendly man, possibly some sort of elve or dwarf seems to have something to do with the death of the teacher. Then either I turn into the doctor or the doctor appears, in his eleventh regeneration. He suddenly begins a speech about that the man can't just "play with lives". I don't remember the rest of the conversation.

      Now I am again somewhere having to do with a storm, but I don't remember anything except that.

      ¹: The school came from the fact that I am constantly stressed out about it, Doctor Who came from my excitement of it coming on One (A German TV channel) every Tuesday, FNaF came from me watching an entire series of Five Nights at Freddy's: Help Wanted on YouTube and the storm came from me looking at stormchasing videos again.

      ²: I had chanted a mantra for a second before drifting off. Seemed to have helped with recall a lot, even when chanting it such a low amount. I will retry this next night.
    2. The creepy monster sang me a song! And then killed me.

      by , 05-24-2019 at 01:45 AM (Awake to take in the view...)
      Two nights ago, I had a dream about a creepy monster. It started out as an orange snake, female. Then it turned into an evil monster. Apparently, it was called a "ground Shrek", and despite the reference to a kid's movie, it was actually quite terrifying.

      It had glowing yellow eyes, and a mouth that was filled with sand. It sang a song as it began eating/killing everyone, and it went like this:

      "...And we shall be appointed view
      Of earth's eternal sleep."

      There were a few lines before it but I couldn't make them out. It kept singing this creepy ditty over and over again as it killed people, and its voice was now deep, masculine, and hollow. The song had a tune similar to a church hymn that I know, "Go Forth With Faith", which for some reason makes it even creepier.

      It raced towards me, and I couldn't get away in time. The last thing I heard inside of its mouth was this song, and I fell into the sand that fell even further into a black void. At that moment, I believed that I was facing death, and I would finally see what the afterlife was like, if it existed. Then I woke up. Terrifying, but cool.
    3. 15 May: Feeling trapped, weirdo victorian musem and enemies at a foreign land

      by , 05-15-2019 at 02:08 PM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening

      At my mom's apartment, something happens and I need to escape. I run for the door and in the stairway I jump all floors through the empty space in middle of the stairs. I expect the chasers not to be able to do so and gain some time with that. But it is one of those recurrent dreams I have in which the ground floor has no exit to the outside and I just hide in one apartment that had the door open and a key inside. I lock the door behind me and look for a window. I find an enclosed balcony but then I open a window and jump, just to find I am inside another balcony and this repeats several times until I decide to control the dream and focus that when I exit the window I am really outside. Funny though, I am back on the top floor and not ground floor, but I fly away and hide behind nearby buildings so my chasers don't see me in the distance. Then I fly to the mountains nearby. I reach them at dusk and find a weird place covered in stone ruins and some people walking among them, like pilgrims, they don't seem dangerous, but they all are a bit mad. They let me be, but some are a bit too curious and pushy and I need to stay flying above them because I don't feel comfortable when they approach me.

      Then I am with Zilla and some other friend on a cruiseship, when we're hit by a huge storm. The ship gets dragged to the coast, enters a canal, ends up in the city of some foreign country. We are in our cabin, getting dressed to go out. It's night and it is a hostile place, but we chose to leave the ship and hide on land. We hide on some hill and we are found by a couple enemy guys. They are armed and I make a bit of a theatre that we are "defenseless confused little girls so please don't shoot us". Instead, they decide to have fun with us. One of them, a big guy, gets on top of me, but I punch him in the throat, then kick his balls, slightly slide down through his legs and apply all my force to throw him over my head and we manage to escape them.

      Then we are ok and safe and visiting a museum related to the Catholic church and full of Victorian things and morbid things related to death, all in silver and lots of lace and velvet. There is a section with a dead mummified dog in an exquisite coffin. It smells like a crypt.

      Me and the girls have settled at a home and we are living in peace. But one day we hear strange noises and we think we saw some guy moving around the house. Suddenly a very old police car stops at our door but the cops are dressed as prisoners with striped jumpsuits. We first suspect of them but they say they came to protect us as they claim to have followed a hired assassin that came to kill us and then we believe them.
    4. Tuesday, March 12

      by , 03-19-2019 at 06:39 AM
      I am somewhere and by Brad Zugle (with short hair). He is saying something about my online application to BaseCamp. I do recall an image of what looks like a Facebook posting. It says something about ‘Ryan’ (it being hyperlinked), but there was no last name, so I wasn’t certain if it was about/for me. It also seems like it was a while ago. I just ask him the best way to submit it. Now I am in the climbing gym?, though it looks more like a small living room and/or Rocksport’s foyer. Brian Sweeney is here, and I talk to him about it. He just seems aloof. The team is here too. I’m doing some pull ups on the hangboard, then I have someone help me with leg throws. I end up doing more than I thought I would, pushing past the burn and really trying my hardest. I want to get back into it and back into shape starting today. I think that I’d be in the climbing gym until about 7 and then have some free time after that. I am now with the team at a park. It seems dim out. I am supposed to be watching over them. Right now, they are running around. Someone has some remote controlled object that flies around. It looks like a cup? but comes apart into many little, connected pieces and then imperceptibly back together. One of them has climbed up pretty high on a fence. I’m thinking about how I should have them come down or it could make me look bad.




      I am with Sage and Guy. We’re on our phones, and there’s something about not hearing from Skye and/or her not posting anything. I am fairly certain she has died, though I don’t really want to say it. I feel a very real pang of sadness.
    5. I died in a lucid dream / life flashing

      by , 01-04-2019 at 09:30 PM
      I was lucid, naturally lucid. I was outside on some pavement trying to build some momentum to fly. I normally fly with no problems at all, but occasionally, I can't. I feel too heavy to lift off the ground or I can't get up past a few feet for more than a few seconds.

      I accepted that this was one of those lucid dreams where I just don't have it in me to fly.

      Suddenly I was pulled FAST through time.

      I saw my entire life flash before my eyes until it was over and I was dead.
      It was like the entire timeline of my life was a tunnel and I was being pulled through faster than the speed of sound. I caught glimpses of everything: my kids growing up, my aging, the mundaneness of day to day life. It all happened so fast
      until I was old with white hair. 82 years old.
      In a hospital. And out the life tunnel I went, my life over. And I was floating in pure black nothingness. My entire life gone, far away. A mere dot of light where I once existed.

      It was the end.
      Categories
      lucid , memorable
    6. 18-12-14 Shot in the Face

      by , 12-14-2018 at 06:26 PM
      I was being shot at. The bullets seemed to go in slow motion, but my own movements were slowed as well. I managed to dodge the first one. I tried to avoid the second and third ones, but quickly noticed it wasn't going to happen. The bullets hit me right in the face (not the head). Next thing I saw, was Claire mourning me. My view was in third person.
      Tags: bullets, claire, death
      Categories
      non-lucid
    7. Vivid Nonlucids - September 14

      by
      ZAD
      , 09-14-2018 at 12:55 PM (ZAD's DJ)
      Sep 14 2018

      On couch - cousin & wife are facing away from TV while fiancee & I are facing towards it. I wanted them to flip around like we were but they were going to sleep or something (she had some kind of problem). Some discussion between my fiancee and I about how flat the layers of the 36-layer cake (cookies and cream, but it had a special name like "seminole" - not that but close) had gotten (I tasted one of the thin layers, it was good). This layer cake desert was from a previous dream fragment. In this dream I'm trying to accomplish something and it becomes a big deal. C&W are stretching out on couch in front of us w/ our dog and their dog, W is trying to take pictures of ours but they're coming out blurry. Posts on facebook with a picture that missed him, people posted sympathetic comments below about how hard it is to take a picture of a dog these days and she liked the comments and posted a better gif that captured him yawning.

      Walking through town at night - look through window and see lights inside, people. Go in, brightly lit, fancy upper class dinner party. There are white tablecloths and food trays and servers. One of us says "These are not our people". Lots of middle-aged women in bright, colorful, but elagant dresses (all one color, some blue, yellow, maybe one peach). Vivid dream, walked through main room and some hallways.

      Vivid and long dream about my fiancee and I (we were at this point in the dream teens who didn't know each other). We were attending some kind of religious boarding school. We were assigned to make love to each other in a small room with a glass door (reminded me of group study rooms at the campus library). I think we got to pick, so as lots of students were walking down the hallway, we reached out to each other and held hands and picked each other as partners. After that we entered the glass room. I'll spare the details here. The dream has several smaller scenes spliced together to make it feel like years passed; we grow up together (in the dream we were allowed to find other partners instead but we both stuck with each other). There's a third friend or one of our siblings, a midget with an adult face who is someohw our age. My fiancee and I are in a side hallway by a door or a water fountain, and we look up as a crowd of students and faculty in sort of acolyte robes with red chef hats are passing through, some of them crying. The midget brother I described breaks off from them and comes over to tell us the news; I assume someone has died and say "who is it?" and he says something snobbish.

      It's years later in a separate dream from the previous dream and I'm watching in third person now. My fiancee is still with "me", but the version of me I'm looking at doesn't resemble me at all (kind of look like a pudgy Elvis impersonator). I'm under a bridge, trying out my new unicycle/stilt that has a "Cuddler" attached to the top where I am -- a Cuddler is one of those chairs that's a cross between a recliner and a loveseat, big enough for two people. Anyway I think the chair is white or black. "I" am standing on the chair's seat cuhion, rocking it back and forth to increase the height of the stilt/unicycle. If I rock back and forth in the opposite direction it will go back down. Fiancee is sitting on the curb watching irritatedly, we both have to go somewhere and I'm holding us up (I say something like "go without me"). The dream self is clearly more focused on reaching the top of the bridge before coming back down. He seems like a bit of a deadbeat (is wearing all white and has a pompadour). I think he's a struggling performer.
    8. xxxi.

      by , 09-02-2018 at 11:29 AM
      Non-dream stuff - I woke up at about 20 to 7 in the morning, sweating a bit. Woke up from a non-lucid dream, right as I was starting to cry for the second time in the dream. The emotion didn't carry over. I went back to bed after writing a draft and eventually woke up again at 10:50. My alarms between 8 and 9 haven't been working of late.



      Dream:
      I was walking around with my mom on the quay in the capitol of my native country. I was holding her arm sort of interlocked with mine, as we've done in the past. She was for some reason lamenting that we, as a family, hadn't accomplished much or that it could have been more, or something like that. I commented that if it weren't for the debt, we would have owned all of the factory in front of us now, instead of just part of it. It was some sort of biscuit factory. I remember we walked along until reaching a cafe.

      The cafe was an odd place, very vertical. I remember my middle brother being there, with his cap and glasses. We went up and down the place trying to get something specific my mom wanted, like a cupcake or muffin from the factory.

      I don't remember the details but I found out my mom had passed away from some natural cause.

      Me and my partner were at home. We somehow had heard or found out that his mom had passed away too, again from natural cause, and I remember thinking that my mom passed at "64" in the dream. I asked my partner if we should message his mom's partner, to inform them, he said maybe, yeah, but we weren't sure about it. In the waking world, they have been somewhat nasty to us over the years, so we have a hard time gauging their reaction to anything we might say now.

      I commented that they passed away at such a similar age, and I cried a little. I then commented "at least my mom passed away at this age and not older; I didn't want to see what she would have been like with all her medications at an old age" or something of this sort, and I collapsed on my knees from the sofa we were sitting on and I cried again, waking up.



      Notes:
      • In the dream, there was a small moment during the conversation with my mom where I thought the topic was odd. Yes, my family had a factory, but that was long ago, and it was on my dad's side of the family, not my mom's. In addition, we've never had any debts as a family.
      • This is the sort of dream I'll have to wait and see. Years ago I had a dream that may have been premonitory about when my dad would pass away, and this dream had the same feeling. If both dreams were correct and my parents passed away respectively at ages 83 and 64, then both events would happen 11 and 6 years from now.
      • My mom had several dreams about her dad passing away several months before the event, which is one of the reasons I've never discarded the possibility of premonitory dreams like this actually happening.
      • Apart from the conversation with my mom in the dream, nothing else during dreaming struck me as "odd", unfortunately.
      • The cafe scene was actually kind of vivid and surreal but I really don't remember many details, certainly not enough to put to words now.
    9. Why did I die?

      by , 08-12-2018 at 08:53 PM
      Two dreams

      My dad, brother and my foster-brother said that men are better than women on everything. My sister and I got very upset but didn’t had a chance to tell them off. So I poked my brother with a stick in his stomach and yelled: ”Too bad it wasn’t a harpoon!” Everybody laughed and my sister told me I had a sassy comeback as always. Then we tried to do everything to prove the guys wrong.


      I was in Italy, just paying a visit to my old school there from when I studied abroad. I had a looong conversation with the principle who asked me questions... strangly in english but I liked it. We had a really good time. She asked me what I wanted to do with my life and I was thinking really hard to come up with a good answer.
      The principle wanted me to come back, but not sure how tho. She was talking and talking and talking. I realized that I no longer really knew where I was. Wasn’t it a part of my own hometown just right outside the window? I wanted to end the conversation but principle seemed so determinded to keep talking about things I could do if I wanted to stay there, Which I didn’t want.
      She wanted me to dye my hair blonde but I didn’t want that. She took me outside to a balcoony and asked me if there were any guys I would like to date but as soon as I looked. I only saw guys that I already knew. Some even from kindergarden. I refused and told her that I already knew these guys and didn’t want anything to do with them. She became very angry and headed inside again. It was time for her to have a lesson. So I decided to run with my old friend’s younger brother, who I never really spoke to.
      We quickly ran away from the school and tried to get to a bus stop. Suddenly I could hear the principle’s vocie behind me. She was furious!
      I wasn’t far from the bus stop when I stopped running and looked back. The young brother was gone but the principal stood there instead, looking at me with sadness in her eyes. First I thought she was going to beg me not to go but what she told me made me go insane. The younger brother was hit by a bus... the very same bus we were supposed to take to get away from this place. I ran away from the bus stop and kept going until I was hit myself by a car.

      Suddenly spirits appeared on the streets, singing and laughing. But not I, because I cried. I covered my face with the hands and cried as loudly as I could. Until I heard my mother’s voice. She wanted someone to hold the dogs’ leashes and take them to a field. I gladly took the dogs over there and found three presents for each pet. The cat wasn’t there tho. I opened the first gift. It was a perfume bottle... MY perfume. I glanced at my dog that was sitting down and paying attention to the bottle. I realized that I had chose the wrong path and cried because I wasn’t there for my dog anymore. I could not pet him, feed him or talk to him. He couldn’t even see me! I couldn’t help but to cry even harder. I just wanted it to be a dream.
    10. The Afterlife is a Wellness Center [Almost LD?]

      by , 04-28-2018 at 03:51 AM (Nonsense and Conundrums)
      I am in the car with my family. We are talking about death and the afterlife. At some point, I mention not being afraid of death. This leads into someone handing me a bomb, the rest of my family disappearing, and the bomb going off.

      The pain is momentarily unbearable, a searing white-hot burn coursing through every bit of my body. Even worse is the immense, crushing pressure. Once the burn ebbs away, the pressure increases, and a loud silence pulses. It feels like I'm breaking apart.

      Suddenly I am somewhere else, and someone is asking for my information at a desk. I ignore her and look arond. It looks like an old house converted into a wellness center. There are a lot of confused poeple of all ages shuffling around. Someone yells out, "Come this way if you want answers," so I decide to follow the voice and check it out. I go where the man directs. The room I walk into next looks like an old classroom with wooden desks; there are already many people seated, waiting expectantly.

      As I sit, I realize something isn't right and try to push my fingers through my palm. It doesn't work the first time, but my fingers push through the second time. I quickly pull them out and stare in wonder. The mistake I make here is instead of realizing I'm dreaming, I believe I am dead.

      The instructor is going on about something irrelevant until I interrupt him and say, "I'm dead, right?" He stares at me and slowly says "yes" in a quiet voice. Instead of being upset, I become curious and start asking questions regarding afterlife and the astral planes. People look at me, confused, and whispering amongst each other. I'm eventually ushered out of the room (I did do a demonstration of how I pushed my fingers through my palm, maybe that's what did me in) and the instructor tells me to keep quiet. I ignore him and move on to explore.

      I find the basement of the house, and thus find something strange. There are hundereds of "cores", strange bowl-like crystalline structures that change colors constantly. They appear in sets of five, the middle corse containing a black orb. I know these are the people's life cores, and my own.

      Sometime later on, a creature smashes through the wall. It's huge and looks reptilian, and causes immense chaos. It smashes many of the cores, including some of mine, and I hunch over in pain. I run back up the stairs, yelling and warning people about the creature. Seems like the excitement wakes me up.
    11. Dead Poet's Society (Not really); lucid dream house TOTY #1

      by , 04-27-2018 at 07:48 PM (Exterminate)
      The first dream happened the morning of the 25th.


      The dream memory was pretty jumbled when I woke up, so I am reconstructing based on memory, voice recording, and a bit of creativity.

      Earthquake / Movie Series

      I was trying to ride a bike, but it wasn't working correctly. A device I was looking at told me to visit two locations in town due to recent "embarrassments" that happened. My brother went with me to check out one of the stores. I recall seeing some items such as old gameboy advance SPs, UFO stuffs, etc. Thinking back, it reminded me of a souvenir shop.
      Next thing I recall I was in a shed behind the house I currently live at, when suddenly the ground started shaking fairly violently. I walked outside and the earthquake got serious. I could see the ground moving and I had to crouch to the ground and try to hold on to something. I then saw what looked to be a tree in front of the house topple over completely. I heard it crack and snap, and saw the top of the tree disappear out of sight. The earthquake stopped, and I went to go investigate. My family stayed back in the shed for some reason. Turns out the majority of the tree was still intact, but a large branch had snapped right off and was lying in front of the tree. Suddenly it started pouring outside. I had the feeling my family was just about to leave the house to go visit my niece and nephew. I went inside the house for some reason, and on my way up the stairs I noticed it was raining indoors! Like a minecraft glitch or something the rain was just straight and consistently falling from the roof, yet there was no visible holes showing the outdoors. I noticed how odd it was, then I saw the window was open, so I shut it, even though it didn't fix it. I went to my room and it had a layer of water on the bottom. It was also raining in this room as well. I started lamenting my computer as it had to be toast now due to the water exposure. I grabbed whatever it was I went into the house for.
      I then explored the house further for more damage and found myself in what seemed to be an attic. Again, it had a layer of water on the floor, so it was flooded. I noticed 3 distinct holes that were just spewing water. One spot looked like a drainage pipe that just came loose, so I pushed it together and it was fixed. The other two were a hole in the floor and one on the wall. I then noticed what I figured was either a hot water heater or otherwise a pipe of some sort. I turned off the water flow and let it drain a bit I opened the hatch to get inside and walked on in. I patched any further holes I saw inside these pipes, but on my way out a family member must have noticed the door open because the door suddenly shut and the water valve was turned back on. I then drowned due to the rising water level inside...
      Suddenly the perspective changed and I was watching the character that died, and he looked just like Jim Carrey did in Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind(Which I just watched the night before. Good movie, recommend).
      I get a glimpse of the character's funeral which included the typical black dresses, weeping, etc. The family was mortified. I then saw the outside of the home again. I'm just observing whats going on, and I see a few white statues gathered around the yard. I thought about how I could have shared with the family what I was doing before trying to fix the leakage. I then blamed myself for causing my family so much grief. Even though the character, or me, or whatever was dead, I was still walking around like a ghost or something. Feeling guilty, I left a message for the dream wife explaining what happened and apologizing for being an idiot. The white mages I saw before approached me, and called themselves dead poets. They invited me to join their group, under the condition that I abandon my old life and never contact them again seeing that I'm dead. They did recommend staying for the burial. They told me I would not be seen due to the SEP. (Somebody else's problem, an effect from HHGG that causes people to ignore the supernatural as if it wasn't there simply because they couldn't possibly be bothered to see it.) I replied that I kinda sortof made a scene my leaving a voice message on the wife's phone. They laughed it off and said that couldn't possibly have any effect. She wouldn't hear it, or it wouldn't have any ramifications, etc. They were wrong. My dream wife saw me immediately at the wake and chewed me out for "faking my death" and "Being an asshole" and "betraying the family..." RIP. She accused me of having an affair, that I didn't love her, etc. what a mess.



      The next dream happened the morning of April 26th, after my sleep cycle ended. I recalled no other dreams, so I set my alarm to snooze. Still no dreams. Back to sleep, and that's where this dream comes in. Tragically, I immediately lost many of the dream's details once I woke up, and even with grabbing the voice recorder right away, I could not recover many details I wanted to.


      TOTY / Lucid
      The dream was very hazy. I found myself floating which is a normal dream sign for me. I commented that I must indeed be dreaming, since this only happens in my dreams. I instantly became lucid, but I really wanted to stabilize the dream. I wanted to make it more vivid, make sure it doesn't end soon, and to increase my control in the dream. I did the nose plug RC and I could breathe well. I noted how unusual this was, since usually when doing this RC I have to struggle to breathe through the plugged nose, but this dream it worked as if there was no blockage at all. I did indeed stabilize the dream to where it felt vivid, but I couldn't fully engage my senses. I was there, but it was not as good as it could be. I started on my list of tasks I would like to accomplish. Step 1, teleport to dream house. One goal is to make my childhood home the center of my dreams. I want most dreams to start there, and I want it to be a hub to visit various persistent dream realms and projects. Anyway, I don't remember how I got to the dream house, but I recall seeing a table and thinking with expectation that I would spawn in a fantasia hat. This hat would allow me to make inanimate objects come to life and do what I wanted them to. The hat did not appear at first, so I then tried putting my hand in front of me and covering my sight of the table where I wanted it to spawn. I then said it would be there when I lowered my hand, and it indeed was there! The hat felt very fake though. The color was more purple than blue, and it was smaller than expected, so it didn't fit my head. It just sat on top. I made a small object come to life. It floated, it glowed, it made sounds, but it didn't do any chores. I then tried it on a vaccum cleaner and a broom. While it did work, I noticed each object earned a small black attachment that signified it was being controlled by the hat's magic.


      I then went exploring in the house, and found it was a mixture of 3 homes I have previously lived in. My logic was clearly not as it should have been at this point because I exclaimed several times how accurate things looked while at the same time fumbling throughout the place like I didn't know where I was going and the layout didn't make sense. I was sortof trying to recreate my dream house as I was walking around and it didn't quite work. I recall going upstairs looking for my old bedroom and I found 3 bedrooms that shouldn't normally be there. I was exploring my old bedroom and noticed it had purple paint on the walls and it was nothing like the appearance of any bedrooms I have had before. I did notice my old comforter on the bed though, so that's interesting. I did actually see the hallway and my older brother's bedroom upstairs as I remember them. The bedroom had a blue carpet and was empty. I called for my dream guide but she didn't show. I tried summoning her around a corner with no success; I called her name, and random children and pets showed up. I actually called out the name Melania at first before catching myself that her name should be Sarah. I ended up going back downstairs and I saw my two brothers eating a pasta meal, and I was going to sit down with them but the only open seat was covered in pasta..
    12. the death dream

      by , 04-06-2018 at 08:54 AM (Deep Inside The Lucid Dreamer's Subconscious)
      Hey friends, this didn't happen last night but I wanted to record a dream I had in the past that's important to my dream history.

      The background is I was very sick when I was about 13 or 14. I had gone to summer camp and came back with swine flu. Not sure if anyone remembers but swine flu had its course of importance a little while back. So, I had this sickness and was in bed or on the couch for a week. I had gone to bed one night at a normal time around midnight and had this interesting experience which tops any nightmare or bad dream I think I've ever had.

      Like most dreams it starts with being in another dream before. I was in this giant landscape that had a valley. The valley was inhabited by ropes for old wooden ships. It was a little bit of a game where my vision was changing between these wide spiral structures made from this rope but wasn't more than 30 or so yards off of the ground. I think I was trying to get through the rope in the structures.

      It's hard to explain the death dream but I was outside of someone's house and simultaneously in a cave. I know we die in dreams often and it's not really a big deal, sure we are dying and we believe it but it doesn't resonate far into waking reality and it doesn't have much to say about our lives, but this is the only time it was different for me.

      I was in a cave with several other people near me, but this dream seemed really important, like me and the people around me were taking part in something important and the feeling was that each of us was nervous and hoping the other would take more responsibility and control of the situation. I haven't been able to feel what other DCs were feeling in dreams, especially not one that was unpleasant, but this time I did. We were all nervous looking around at each other.

      The idea of this dream is that there's a boulder falling down onto one single person. That person is experiencing this boulder falling onto them. It's not like a job to hold it up, there's no purpose between the boulder and the person. The first part that made this dream intimidating is that the boulder is somehow simultaneously getting larger and smaller at the exact same time. The boulder is rumbling extremely loudly and shaking the entire cave. The boulder is more of an idea than a physical object getting bigger and smaller in my mind.

      Outside of the house, there is an RV camper to the left of me. There's two people in front of me, but the idea is that there's eight people there with us. The main idea is that we have to nominate someone to die out of the eight of us. This is where the death comes in. I can actually feel the chance that I will be chosen and executed. The two people in front of me are busy doing something, but I can feel eight people looking at me like it's my choice who gets killed.

      After this, my vision is of this spiral inwards. In the middle is this powerful white laser beam of light. I don't mean a white light I mean this thing could cause anything that touched it to disappear. This was death in the dream. I was at some point in the white laser beam getting blasted. In the dream, I was dying, but I was fighting against it with everything in me. I was not okay with dying. I've been shot in a western shoot-out, I've fallen off a cliff, but I somehow knew I was dying here.

      I was at the same time in the cave, the boulder had rolled down a ramp and now above me. I was supposed to carry this boulder that was gaining mass but at the same time getting smaller, but the mass was too heavy and I was struggling. At the same time, I was in this white laser beam at the center of this maelstrom fighting for my life. At the same time I was outside of a house next to an RV getting volunteered to be the one who dies in this one of eight game.

      I eventually woke up absolutely drenched in sweat early in the morning. It was still dark. When I woke up, I felt in a way that I had cheated death or somehow saw what it was but avoided it. I got some water and went back to my bed but was absolutely terrified of going back to bed. When I used to pray, I would pray for the normal things. But if I was ever lying in bed and thinking about dreams I've had and that particular death dream came up, I would send a prayer up that would guarantee I wouldn't have that dream ever again.
      Categories
      non-lucid
    13. Fever dreams

      by , 03-26-2018 at 06:14 PM
      I have the flu, so my dreams have been weird or unsettling. This is a few nights' of dreams gathered into one entry.

      The first night, when I was just coming down with the flu, I felt like garbage and had weird fever dreams where friends were inviting me to LuLaRoe (it's a garbage clothing MLM) parties and trying to sell me things. I kept waking up angry and wanting to be left alone, then falling back to sleep and having the same dream over again but with a different person. Why my brain was obsessed with people trying to sell me MLM shit, I have no idea, but that was all I dreamed about the entire night.

      Last night, I dreamed about 3 different people who were dead, those dreams where you forget they're dead and they're alive again and then you wake up and realize they're dead. The first 2 were dead pets (a cat and a rabbit) and the third one was my stepfather. I woke up from the 3rd dream thinking "Wow it's been a while since I've seen stepfather, how come?" and then woke up a little bit more and remembered that it's because he's dead and started crying. The crying did not help my already-flu-congested face. On the other hand, at least I got to pet my dead rabbit for 15 dream minutes, and she was as soft as I remember.
      Categories
      non-lucid , nightmare
    14. 2-8 to 2-9-2018 dreams (2 interesting LDs)

      by , 02-09-2018 at 03:36 PM
      I decided that it was a bit much for me to go back and highlight everything in color that was lucid. So it is all non lucid until otherwise noted. And then if you wanted to read the lucid parts just do a search and skip ahead to those.


      I know I should probably be interested enough in my own dreams to go back through them but some nights like last night, where I had some amazing dreams, I just am so frustrated with having forgotten so much that I don't even want to think about my dreams.


      I was able to fall asleep probably around 9. I felt tired around 6:30 or 7 but couldn’t sleep. I napped two hours during the day but I was still tired. I just couldn’t sleep for some weird reason. Reading some of my older dream journal entries seemed to be helpful.



      Round 1 of Dreams

      Something about driving to my sister, on a road near a local hospital. There was more that happened before this but this was all I got. I had been telling her something that may have been too much for her to know. We were coming from some kind of meeting or class setting. Maybe she had gotten some kind of special coffee. It was like we were driving, and I needed to go fast with certain intense kind of metal music on, I am not exactly sure why. Something about a way I coped. But that wasn’t good for her. There was something to do with time? Maybe some kind of meeting. There was some kind of design she drew in the sand or dirt on the ground, with a stick. I drew a similar design but at different angles.
      At another point, it was like she was pulling some stones out of the ground. They left triangle shaped marks in the ground where they had been pulled from. This seemed not okay to do at first but it was fine.
      Dad was saying how she should eat something like eleven to twelve fresh strawberries every day, referring to a nearby wild garden. I got the sense that he was sacrificing his strawberries for her to be able to have more. It might have also meant for me to eat strawberries or for her to feed the bird strawberries. Dad wouldn’t get any strawberries. I was wondering how he would do that when he should really “put on his own oxygen mask first”.
      Then my sister was holding up a small stick from a tree that had some sap dripping from it. We were both saying and thinking how she should be careful not to get pregnant from all that tree sap.
      We had a bird. I think it was a yellow bird. It seemed to like walking on a tread mill, and if we let it walk on a tread mill, it would just completely lose track of time for days. There was a woman showing one of those new fangled hamster wheels that have the disc they can run on, its like a diagonal disc instead of a wheel thing. The woman was spinning it in her hand and saying how we can’t give treadmills to birds any more. Then she showed us to a part of the wall that disappeared and had a hallway behind it.
      The idea was to make the bird use its mind and meditate, not just become a “mindless cardio bunny”.
      I would have remembered these dreams much better, but I woke up on my left side, with a nerve being pinched. Before I even knew I had woken up, I must have felt the nerve pinch and rotated onto my front. Then, I was on my front, and my neck was twisted badly, so I thought I should really go to my back. So I had to do all this moving before I could think of the dreams. I’m sure if I had been able to stay still, or move less, I would have got what it was I was telling my sister. I was frustrated because there was a lot lost.



      Round 2 of Dreams.


      It took me a while to fall back asleep. My shoulders were having a pinched nerve on both sides so I couldn't sleep on my side. Between that and the frustration of forgetting the previous dream, and other factors, I had trouble sleeping. I eventually found that I could slide a pillow underneath my side to take pressure off my shoulder and fell asleep on my right side.

      First, in this dream, I was in some kind of a class setting. I think there was some negative feeling, maybe conflict or fear. I have a vague sense of it but nothing I can put into words. This frustrates me very much because I don't remember how I got to the lucid part.

      Once I became lucid, I was in this office type of thing. Then I was in this hospital type of room and there was a kid on the bed. He had brown hair in a bowl type of haircut like I had growing up. Not sure exactly the age but young. He had his front two teeth and his lateral incizors, but the teeth outside those were missing. I noticed this discrepancy (I am missing my front lateral incizors) but I figured this was a version of myself as a child. It took me a moment. What it felt like was that I was dreaming from the viewpoint of that child for a while, and the next thing I knew, I was my adult self looking at the child. I said hello or something like that and we talked. Again, I can only remember this vaguely, which really frustrates me. It is so devastating to lose dreams like this.

      There was this tablet with a blue light filter on it that kept falling. It was his tablet. I was able to telekinetically keep picking it up for him before it fell. I think as the dream went on, he became younger, closer to a baby. I think he fell at one point, but I used telekinesis to get him into my arms.

      There was a little torch lighter, with the bendable hose part, that he was playing with. This didn't seem safe.

      At one point, we were towards the end of the room and there was some kind of female nurse there. I thought of trying to talk to her but realized I was with the child now.

      I had the child in my right arm, and noticed the fingers of my left hand were really crazy. I had a thumb, two fingers, then two missing stubs of fingers, then three more fingers. I showed the child, look, my hand has a lot of fingers. I already knew it was a dream.

      The torch lighter kept falling and I wanted to put it away. I had the thought that I might be in my subconscious, so maybe I should put the torch lighter in a safe cabinet, where the child can't get it and burn up the place when I am not there. There were all these silver cabinets and I found one to put it in. This whole part of the room seemed to be stainless steel. I found a cabinet on the right hand side that I wanted to put it in, but couldn't get the latch to open for me to put it in there. I guess I let that go after that.

      Then, I had the baby child in my left arm. I wish I had thought to talk more to the baby child. Instead, I was sort of acting as if I were in my own dream by myself, with no one there, just that I was holding this object for some reason. So I kind of missed out on that chance, but maybe I wasn't ready.

      I was near these sinks. To my right I opened a door to a stainless steel bathroom with a toilet hole in the floor. It was pretty dirty all over the place in here. There were two pretty grimy sponges near the sink, and all this grimy, gooey water. With the child in my arm, I decided that instead of flying away, I should clean the bathroom. Since I was thinking this was my inner mind, I figured cleaning the bathroom would be symbolic in some way. And a smart thing to do. I couldn't think of anything else to do, so I grabbed the less grimy sponge, and started to scrub the stainless steel of the bathroom. I guess I thought I was going to clean the whole thing.

      Next, I noticed there was no ceiling in this place. Just walls that went up. So I flew up above the walls a little. When I looked down, I saw this big office space with people in cubicles. I knew I had seen this earlier in the dream. I was amazed at how my dream location was so solid, that a location from before was in the exact same place, looking just as it did the last time. I was a few floors up from them somehow.

      I got the idea to fly down and fly around the office space. Then I kind of got the idea that I shouldn't do that, for whatever reason. It might get me in trouble or something. Well, I sort of ignored that instinct, and jumped down. Then, I woke up.

      I definitely hope that next time I have the chance, I remember to just stop trying to be so busy doing things, and actually talk to the child. There was so much more I forgot that happened with the child. He was crying for something at some point and I got it for him with telekinesis.

      It is so frustrating that I forgot so much of this dream. I stayed perfectly still upon awakening and thought through it. But, nothing else. No clue how I became lucid. No memory of at least half the stuff that happened when I was with the child. Sometimes dream recall can be torture for me because I find out how much I forgot.

      I had a very short dream flash after I started to think through that lucid dream where it was a dark sky. There were two light-up letters, maybe H, U, or, H, A, or A, H, I am not sure any more. I could see it clearly when I was in the dream flash but I had forgotten moments later. The letters faded into a black cloud on the bottom of the dream "screen". Then there was a white light in the middle. I knew it was a dream flash all along, so it was kind of like the beginning of a wake initiated lucid dream, but I couldn't figure out how to extend it into a new dream.

      After that I was awake, thinking through the dream. I had some sleep paralysis begin to set in and hoped another dream would begin, but it wasn't coming. I got up to write this one and now I will go back to sleep.





      Round 3 of dreams. .

      I remember there was some part with someone talking about something to do with safety? Not quite sure.

      One part where I was in my high school. Maybe flying, but not lucid. Starting to think I might be dreaming.

      There was another part when I was in the water. I forgot a lot of this, too. I remembered it at first but must have been tired.

      This last part was very interesting. There was a woman who had sort of kidnapped me in the back seat of her car. She had a gun pointed towards me. Actually, she even shot me at one point, and I died. It didn't hurt, but I had the feeling that I died. i think I experienced something, but I am not sure. That was actually really cool.

      Then, I was in that dream again, and she was driving me still. I was trying to play dead so that she wouldn't think she had to shoot me again, but I couldn't stay still. She started to aim the gun at me, and I realized I was dreaming. I had one of these moments where I said, you can't shoot me again, this is my dream. Then, I remembered the last time I did that in a dream, and the other dreamer didn't like that. So I said, well, it is both of our dreams. But I just don't want you to shoot me. And I both grabbed the gun with my dream hand and used some mental will to get the gun in my possession.

      Then, instead of wanting revenge on her for putting me through this, I realized she must be in trouble if she had to hold me hostage. So, I decided, knowing it was a dream, to help her. I asked her more about why she had kid napped me, but I don't remember that much. She said she had some other salts in the car. I asked if they were for punishing me, and she said, yes. I didn't really get mad at her, though.

      So I was sort of helping her find her way. We were 3 hours away from home. It was a silver or light gray mini van.

      At one point, I thought she might have had the gun again. I had to double check that it was in my right hand pocket of my north face jacket. She had some stuff laid out on the floor. I think we had got to some sort of hotel.

      Then there was a thing about how even if she didn't kill or torture me, other people would still come after me. So, we had to make it look like she had succeeded somehow. Then, all of these ransom note type things appeared on the screen. Maybe I had lost lucidity at some point, but becoming lucid and getting the gun from her might have been all I needed to consciously do.

      She seemed to have dark hair. I think she was Italian. I think I almost asked her if she was Italian but didn't want to seem to be stereotyping her?

      There was a lot more stuff in these dreams but I guess I slept on it more as I was laying there trying to remember it. I had difficulty sleeping tonight, so I can accept that I was just too groggy. But still, it hurts to forget, because the parts were definitely cool.

      Oh, right, here is one part. Painfully vague, but I've got it. There was something about squatting over a squat toilet. My friend from High School Rich M was saying something. He was saying how it was hard to squat there for a while, so I said to eat some chicken while he does it. Then, he said that it would cause him to poop more from eating the chicken. But I thought, the chicken won't digest immediately and make new poop that has to go out until later.

      I think there was a part with a girl I liked from high school. All of this is now painfully vague and I am somewhat upset about the memory loss.

      I should have got myself up, but I didn't because I was still remembering details from the dream in my mind. I thought I should stay still to try to remember more of it, but then I guess as I was doing that, i fell asleep some number of times. That just means I was tired, and reasonably so. A lot of times, when I am not too tired, I think through the dream until i know I am done, then get right up to write it, without any risk of falling back to sleep.

      There might have been something with my sister and a bird, unless that was an earlier dream. It could have been both this dream and an earlier dream.

      Well, I will go back to bed now. i will try to see if I can recall any other parts.

      When I was at the high school there may have been something about the A V club.









      Round 4 of dreams.

      These were cool but again I am very dissappointed with my dream recall.

      So, there was something with my sister. We were in this room that had all white and dark brown stuff. It was like a bathroom or a mix of different rooms including a bathroom. There was something also mixed in about these people chanting some incantations around a ring to summon a fairy. The ring said Zelda on it. They were going to summon a fairy called Zelda, but I was thinking Zelda is a princess in the video game, but I didn't think she was a fairy. Anyway, it didn't have to be video game zelda. So then I saw two people, I think my sister on the right hand side, and myself on the left hand side, sitting on toilets in this white and brown room. I got the sense that my sister would be sucked through the toilet when the people summoned the fairy, but I was going to go with her. I was also eating something in the room. I had my multivitamins and chicklets. I was going to offer my sister some gum. I was afraid that it was too dirty of a room to eat in, because of there being a bathroom right near it.

      In an earlier dream, there was a guy saying how something most people think is non violent might not actually be non violent. I forgot what it was but it seemed so insightful. It was something I never would have thought of.

      Yeah, quite dissappointed with my dream recall tonight. I am pretty much always dissappointed with my dream recall right after the dream, because I am still aware of how much I forgot. Once I forget how much I forgot, and I am just left with the dream journal entries themselves, I don't have such bad feelings about it. Also, I think nights with better dream recall mean I am getting less deep sleep, so there will be a balancing effect where I get deeper sleep the other nights at the expense of dream recall.

      I woke up from these dreams laying there for a few solid minutes (it felt like) before any dream details came to mind. I remember I was eating something, but it was so much food that I would have to put on an m p 3 to distract me from how much I had to eat. Also, I felt like I was laying there thinking of the dreams at times, but when I woke up physically, I couldn't remember a thing. Maybe I dreamed that I was thinking of it. I don't know.

      Hopefully I can sleep one more time and have a dream I can actually remember well enough to be happy. But I will probably never be happy!



      Round 5 of dreams. .

      I slept again, and I know I had some dreams. My dreams over this last night were a lot harder to remember than usual, for whatever reason. I regret this but I guess it just means my body and mind needed some deeper and more restorative sleep. I kind of overdid it on some things lately and too much exhaustion seems to not be good for dream recall.

      The one part of the dream I remembered was I was hearing this song. Maybe there was something on a table. I remembered the words to the song at first, but then forgot them. There was this rubber ball swinging around on a string. Then I heard a loud "thud!" either from waking life or from the dream, like an auditory hallucination. The "thud!" woke me up in a startle and my memory of dreams was completely wiped out. It might have been a thud from outside. I tried to stay still and think about the dreams, but couldn't get any.





      Other Notes
      Here is some other writing about my dream recall frustrations I did:

      There may have also been some kind of creepy monsters in the earlier parts but that might have been something i was thinking about before I fell asleep. I was thinking about being nice to snakes I see when I am in the woods and how it would be cool to be able to befriend snakes even when most people would say it is dangerous, just by being very loving towards them on a deep level.


      Forgetting so much of a dream like this really kills me. I am totally exasperated over this, because I feel I am doing everything I possibly can to maximize my dream recall. I don't know if anyone else has this level of pain over forgetting parts of their dreams, but I do. I just want to remember what happened in my dream, but all i get is like 25 to 50 percent. And I am stuck with that, no matter how much I try to visualize it or focus on it. The memories just seem to be gone.

      Also I don't think I had any false awakenings.
    15. The Nightmare that scared my childhood

      by , 01-05-2018 at 06:47 PM
      When I was in elementary school I was around 9-10 years old and one night I had had this dream where I was in this dimly lit hallway that had purple and green lighting
      I'm of first nation descent and at the end of the hall was a small room where I found one of those big animal skinned drums you see at pow wows and a few drummers that I knew were all sitting around it drumming and singing. This dream doesn't get disturbing until I walk back down the hall and see two doors, one is for the girls bathroom and the others it for the boys, I go to open the girls bathroom and as I open it I see my sisters dead body hanging on a hook that was attached to the inside of the door. Her eyes were open and lifeless and her mouth hung open then quickly my dad comes out of the bathroom grabs the door and swings it shut. I wake up and I was so disturbed that I was shaking and was afraid of my dad for a while after which is odd considering I love my dad and tho I do remember the times he'd get angry and grab my arm a little too tightly but he'd always apologize after and he'd never hurt me on purpose so the dream was real confusing.
      Categories
      nightmare
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