non-lucid

April 16, 2014: I am inside a large canvas flap tent at what appears to be a Hawaiian Luau. There is a large number of Hawaiian / Calypso performers and singers assembled on a low, broad multi-tiered stage at the front of the tent. The flap used to enter and exit is to the left as seen from the audience (stage right). The smallish audience - we barely outnumber the performers - are seated on rows of grey metal chairs arranged in an arc. Patrick Swayze is seated in front of me. His shirt is off. He gets up and passes through the tent flap, exiting the performance just prior to its commencement. Following this, a man straightens out the flap closure and the music starts. I wake.

Morning of April 16, 2014. Wednesday.



This was a fairly long dream, but many of the details are not quite clear (assuming they were clear from the beginning). My wife and family and I are seemingly living in my sister’s older house on Loomis Street. It is a bit different, though, and has an extra broom closet in one area near the kitchen. We are visited by an unknown male who dies somehow and by which it seems he should then be hidden in the house (in the fictional broom closet) until it is decided what should be done.

Sometime later, Art Carney shows up as his Norton character, but a bit older than that character implied on “The Honeymooners”. I believe he is looking for the other man relating to some money he owes him (to be paid by him soon) or some such. Art Carney also dies somehow (not violently) and is hidden under a mattress for a time.

Because of the house filling up with bodies, perhaps we should move to a new address, I reason, so we start putting our belongings in a few boxes. I am not sure when and where we are moving.

A little later, an older detective shows up and starts asking questions. I am not sure how he knew that the two men had been to our house, and it had only been a very short time since they were reported “missing”. Looking closely, I notice that he appears to be Art Carney and thus had not died in my dream earlier. He is wearing glasses and appears to be wearing makeup to alter his face in a very similar manner as Tom Hanks at the beginning of the movie “Cloud Atlas”. I say to him, “oh, you’re Art Carney” thinking it is amusing that he “died” in my dream, and is now pretending to investigate the situation as if it is some sort of game or scene from a movie that is being rehearsed.

However, he denies that he is Art Carney (even though it actually is him or at least a fictional twin) but is not threatening in any way. My dream starts to decay after this (perhaps because I was able to “see” who he really was), but this was the most vivid scenario.

This is related to several real-life events and facts that are very cleverly linked to things I am well aware of (including a relentless Internet troll who seems obsessed with me for whatever reason). Carney is a play, apparently on “Carnivore”, and is also related to the “Emperor Norton” dream about the “village idiot” (as Art Carney played a character named Norton who worked in the sewers - again, on “The Honeymooners” television show - but not relative in any way to Emperor Norton even though there is an incidental association here). It is also relative to the Art Carney movie “Harry and Tonto” as well as the term “carnal knowledge”. The number of multiple layers and associations are fascinating, but in that regard, the “show is over”, thus the deaths in my dream. I no longer need to waste time focusing on the “village idiot”.

4.16.14

Last night, bed at 8:30ish pm- 1:50am

DR when woke up

I'm living in an incredibly huge house. It's not mine, someone is letting me stay there. They are away now and someone is telling me that before they come home, I need to clean up. I'm pissed, because didn't even use any dishes or anything, and I have to clean up. There are 2 other people living there as renters or something, so while I'm putting dishes to dishwasher, I'm telling them to clean their shit up, coz I ain't doing it.

Alex comes in as the owner with his lawyer as i'm sleeping and I'm pissed that they don't even lower their voices.

A contractor is there now and he is going to make another huuuuge walk in closet for the owner, same one, that I'm using now. He is asking me if I took my clothe out already. I told him he told me he will start construction in a month and I should empty the closet in 3 weeks, so wtf. He is asking me if I want the owner to put my stuff in the storage for now. I say no way in hell.

I hear the TV and I'm walking in the room to shut it down. I come to one of the bathrooms in the house. Someone is staying there too. There are 2 flat screens on the wall, both are on on some diff channels. I'm trying to shut them off. Then I see 3 flatscreens in the middle, with some videogame in progress and another monitor to the left of them. I also see a main system remote and I think I should not shut it down, coz he has a game in progress.



Ok, so it seems I was a bit angry last night, lol. We'll fix it tonight.

23:30 bedtime

00:00 Wednesday 2014-04-16

I tried RILD (rhythmic WILD) with swimming motion a few times through the night but either I'm not tired enough or don't do it long enough, or too many distractions so it doesn't seem to work. Set alarms for every hour starting from 04:00, I notice two of them, turn them off entirely at 06:00 since I'm feeling really tired and not well rested. Alarm includes a buzz which with the phone under my pillow is quite jarring. I don't like alarms! Have to get intention to wake up working again.

Very low awareness with the exception of the mask/mirror/kitchen scene where I feel like "me" but with no memory at all.

06:01

(dreamtime around 01:30)

+ in hotel/motel with wife, she says let's go home for two days, I wonder about keeping our reservation while we're away. Pulling out onto the road in the car (I'm driving), there's a sign across the street about it being disallowed to pick the flowers.

(dreamtime not sure? 03:00 - 04:00?)

+ break up a fight between kids, outdoors suburban environment lots of trees around. One kid is sitting down with his back against (a tree/wall). It is the young face of a boy scout from my old troop. I study his face, I see it entirely very very clearly. He is wrinkling his face up a bit then stops. Thinking about (someone says?) how faces change during adolescence, he has that funny "adolescent" nose, somewhat out of scale with his face. I focus closely on his face skin, it becomes textured and crusty like tree bark, I see the crust fairly closely, including the edge of the crust, like it's a layer on top of his normal face.

Inside the house there are groups of kids we're detaining for some reason.

I get into a shower with one athletic shoe on (right foot) to wash it. I have clothes on, I notice my t-shirt The shoe is very uncomfortable once it's wet, I'm looking at that wet shoe on my foot and flexing my foot/toes within the wet shoe.

Outside in the garden we're talking about the car -- should it go for maintenance service to the shop or should we try to fix it ourselves?

+ playing basketball with black kids on a professional / college court in a stadium

+ Outdoors/daytime/tree-lined city streets. I have my dog (as a puppy) in my hands and I put him in a basket in my "car" (which is like a child's wagon or toy pedal car) to take him home. Across the street to the left I see a small young girl alone/crying walking on the sidewalk like she's lost. I get out of the car and go to her, I pick her up and walk back along the sidewalk, find her mother, give the child to her, the child is like a doll, and seems to be made from two slices of steak.

I return to my car, and my dog is gone. I look through the basket I put him in several times and confirm he's gone. I walk through the neighborhood looking for him I see lots of other dogs. Look for dog in apartment complex on hill, find girl in apartment with her dog, girl and I connect? I get the idea she will not commit.

+ I'm holding a large complex tall rubber mask. There are fitted eye slits in the mask, I pull off the covers of the eye slits they're covered by a thin filmy squishy sort of wet gel, I put down the wrinkled gel covers on the counter and look at them for a while. I put the mask on my face and look in the mirror. I adjust the mask so my eyes show out through the eye slits, it looks fairly creepy with my "staring" eyes looking out of the mask. There is a tall green rubber part of the mask that must be put on over your head. My dad didn't want to put on the mask.

I'm standing behind parent's stove (not possible as in WL it's against the wall), my mom wants me to cook the french fries I'm very confused about what she wants me to do, I see little bins of spices and ingredients right under my face next to me on the back of the stove, I see strange shaped and sized cooking pans and a container of about 20 french fries, doesn't seem like there's much to cook.

+ in car with folks in downtown B near U I drive off the curve onto the street but the car does not bounce too strongly, I miss the last right turn and the remaining streets are all left one way only so I'm going to have to go way around the blocks to the left to get where we need to go

+ fight against transformers (low quality cartoon visual of opponent robots), my team wants to run when they see them, I am confident and run into battle, I jab a power staff into the ground strongly and this blasts all the enemies. I enter a room right there through a glass wall, I know the pillow cat we're looking for is there, I ignore it, the people are abstract and made out of inflatable pillow/cushions on a bed, I grab a "girl" being, turn her over, and run my tongue in a circle around where it's "mouth" should be, and around its "girl parts."

After recovering a large metal tank that fell from the sky, and driving it to the lab, I monitor a pressure gauge as I adjust the oxygen valve, trying to maintain 1 atmosphere of pressure inside the container. I suspect the gauge is faulty, due to a big lag time in response, and in the wild swings from high to low pressure. A smart man from India tells me that the pressure is really determined by the temperature. I think he's just being a jerk, but can't think of any good comebacks based on PV=nRT, given that the volume is a constant, and I already mentioned the pressure.
Done with the experiment, he starts to wrap up some empty crates to ship back to the warehouse. I go to grab a rope to tie them all together, cut off 4 arm spans worth of it, and return to see he already wrapped it using shrink wrap. Happy that I tried to help, despite disagreeing with him, I walk up the road to relax a bit.

I find a corner to a room, with shelves meeting the wall. It is designated as the "Hollywood Corner" I am surprised that it doesn't smell like alcohol. In fact it smells very clean. It even looks clean. How strange! I tell my friend who is with me that "it's the hollywood corner, and it doesn't smell like beer!" I see some clean boxes of caffeine free soda neatly on the shelf. She is uninterested, but I think this is amazing and tell her friend who is behind her, "You'll never believe this, the Hollywood Corner doesn't smell at all like alcohol!" She is shocked, so I tell her again.
Before I can finish saying it again, my friend starts tickling me. It tickles so much, normally I would have to pee, but I don't. So I give in to being tickled, and don't fight it. She enjoys this and tickles me more!

The tickling gets so intense, that it reaches a whole new level of tickle. Hard to describe. But as a result of being tickled, my mind encompasses my surroundings, and spontaneously manifests itself as chocolate bars, chocolate Easter bunnies, and chocolate eggs, all nicely wrapped. As the tickle intensity further increases, so do the chocolates that appear everywhere around us, on the floor, on the shelf, on the wall. I don't like chocolate, but my friend does

I was underwater and did a reality check of my hand. My hand looked normal and it looked like I had 5 fingers but upon counting them, I had 6 fingers. I became lucid for a few seconds.
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In my other dream, I was at a school campus and was getting some food at the cafeteria there was a very long line of people I recognized. After I ate, I went to a football field. It was nighttime and it was very foggy. Some little girls were there and I said "Looks scary, doesn't it?" I was gonna take a video of the fog but the girls got in the way. The camera was laggy. I also remember seeing P. Foy and M. Padilla talking.

I was with a group of people and some guy was having us go through obstacles. Whoever made it to the finish first would live. We were digging through some dirt to find something for the guy's wife. I found it and started running towards the next place. Suddenly some samurais started running towards us. I used a sword to kill one of them. One of the samurai caught up to me and said he's "Here to help". The man is a male in his 40s with Asian decent. He had balding hair. I wondered if he was my dream guide.

I was in a suburban neighborhood and when I got home, I was looking for someone. The house was getting broken into by the neighbors and I ran to get my rifles. I grabbed my AR15 and started shooting the guys. It was a crazy firefight and I ran out of ammo so I ran to get another rifle. It was dark and I couldn't see very well but I felt the weapon and realized it was my AK. The firefight kept going and I went to the neighbor's house to kill him. Suddenly, monsters started appearing and attacking me. I shot at them but was running out of ammo again. A girl appeared and started helping me. A boss monster appeared and we managed to almost kill it.

I was in a high school with a group of people I knew. I was on a team for soccerball (basketball / soccer) It’s a game that you play with a ball you toss it around and you kick it into the goal but the ball can never touch the ground and you can’t move with the ball. My team was doing good as I called out different plays and movements and they listened. After the game I got away as there was some drama. I left and was driving down a highway and as I was driving this man was talking to me. He said he was going to try and send me something and would be sending it near a tank I tell him I would try and look for the item he is sending but I don’t see the ball he said he was sending. I go down a 2 track and look for the ball and go driving around the tight corners. After a few minutes of not finding it I think to myself that I should probably turn around as it couldn’t of gone this far. I turn back around and pull out onto a main road and head towards a lake. I stop at a red light and see this lady across from me at the light and she seems to be my mother. She is sad and upset and won’t stop crying and I realize it’s because she feels alone and her cancer is going to try and kill her. I tell her that everything is going to be okay and that I am here for her and I know her pains because if it wasn’t for people I wouldn’t be alive as I would feel alone in the world. She takes off still crying as the light turns green and I get upset and drive the car into the lake. I get out and see my fiancé is there with me I begin to get upset with her and ask her why she drove the jeep into the lake. She didn’t have an answer because I was the one driving and I decided I would just try and build a ramp and drive the jeep out as it was barely in the water. I swam around in the crystal clear water and pick up several rocks and put them on top of each other making a ramp like thing and then I begin to grab clay from the bottom water and I patch it between the rocks. I turned around and saw that the jeep was now sinking as it rolled further into the lake. I looked out and saw my mom and dad in their yellow jeep but saw they were also trying to help somebody else. I started to swim towards my jeep and I heard a splash and saw my dad dive under towards my jeep. I looked up and saw two helicopters pull up ahead and lowered two cables towards me. I grabbed them and took a deep breath and went under water I swam and swam opening my eyes to see where I was going. Finally in the distance I could see my jeep and my dad next to it waiting for the cable. I hand him a cable and we put them onto the jeep one on the front one on the back. We surface and signal to the helicopters to lift and they did. They pulled the jeep to dry land and then as I was unhooking one of the cables I noticed that one cable was wrapped around and stuck in the back propeller of one of the helicopters. I waved and pointed and signaled that I was going to pull the cable and try and get it unstuck and wrapped around the tail end. The Pilot cut the engine and it began to fall towards me as I pulled and pulled on the cable I got it to loop around but it was still stuck. I signaled to pulled back up and try it again he started up again and got higher and then cut the power again as he began to fall I pulled and pulled but it was coming off. At the last second I pulled one last time harder than before and the cable came loose and came flying off. The pilot quickly tried to start the engine again and powered up the propellers and took off just as he was hitting the water. I signaled good job to them and then a giant robotic arm machine came flying at me and hit me on both sides of my chest. I could feel the pressure of it as it shoved me into the water and holding me there. I got away and swam in the water and noticed something strange ahead. There was some kind of museum and there was a bunch of wax looking statues under water but there was air bubbles coming from their nose and mouths. It was a bunch of famous you tubers. I swam around them bubbles of air coming from my mouth as well as I looked at each one of them to see if they were real.


I was in a western place as the landscape was that of a desert. There was a giant metal structure in front of me and the group of people I was with. We were savaging around looking for different items to take with us that we could possibly use. The few people in our group grabbed these two giant yellow beams that had black cameras on it. I looked around and looked to see if we could take the ladder type object that was bolted to the frame but didn’t have the right tools with me so I couldn’t pry them off. I looked around at the ground and saw a big unfolded cardboard box and thought I should take that with us because we might have some kind of use for it. I picked it up and my hands got all wet as I noticed the box was all soggy. I pulled the box up and stuck it under my arm and then looked around some more. I noticed a giant granola bar that had chocolate chips in it and different kinds of nuts. I grabbed it and began to look around some more. I came across a pile of shoes around 6 in total all different styles and looking very old and dirty. But in the state we were in anything could be of use. I picked them up putting the ropes around my shoulder. As I was picking up the last few pairs a man came up and began to talk to me. He had a thick head of white hair and a white mustache. He had lots of wrinkles over his face and was not the to big or to small in weight. He pulled his cigar out of his mouth while puffing a small white cloud of smoke. Hey do you mind if I take those bottles of v8 and ketchup? I look over to my left and notice the bottles. No you can have them. Are you sure you don’t want them? No its okay I don’t really want those you can have them you could even make yourself some bloody Mary’s with it. He smirked and put his cigar back into his mouth and said thank you. He puffed another cloud of smoke and grabbed the containers. Say you better hurry up don’t you think? You might not be able to find your group if you don’t hurry. I’m not too worried I think I know where they are going. Oh? So are you a pretty good guesser then? I’m one of the best guessers. I grabbed the last shoe and turned around and began to run off into the direction my group went. I arrive at the town I was heading to and as I got closer I saw a basketball come bouncing my way I quickly stopped it and rolled it back to the person playing and went under a glass garage door that he had opened. I stood up and brushed off and looked around it was a team of people that looked like they were practicing for a movie / show where they were going to sing and dance while playing basketball. I walked past them and got closer to some other random Dc’s and found myself conversing with them. But as I did the scene became different as I was now in a third person view. A girl began talking to the dc that was me and ask if I am this celebrity person and I tell her no no that cant be me. She then said I was him because of my voice and how it matched perfectly. My person went through a portal and ended up on top of a the big stone wall that was next to them and was now on a unicorn. He walked about on the unicorn at the top of the ridge and headed off into the distance as he went towards a thick vegetation world. He got off the unicorn and jumped in and began eating different kinds of candy plants that were in there and began to transform. A voice began talking to me and telling me how I have to be careful as I don’t want to overdose on the items otherwise I wont be able to get out. He then sent me an image of Winnie the pooh as he was floating around dipping his hand in some honey and eating it. He then told me how there has only been two people to get out that have eaten the amount I have so far and that I need to get out quick as im at 20% consumption and nobody has gotten out past 22% . The dream shifted and I was now at a house I could tell it was my buddies house and went upstairs to try and settle in. As I did I looked across the hall and saw a mustard stain on some metal that was on his parents room floor below the door. I pushed the door open and thought wow they never cleaned that stain from me before? I went down stairs and then went back up and was about to clean the stain when a maid began to harass me asking me what I was doing. She pulled out a gun and motioned for me to go back down stairs I told her I was looking for a phone charger and she began to explain how there was one downstairs and I said no I’m looking for my charger I left it up here. She didn’t believe the story and pointed the gun at me more aggressively. I went down stairs and she brought me to the door. But as I was about to leave the door opened and my friend came in with 5 or so other people. The maid backed off after he explained my charger was upstairs in his room on his desk.

Dream Fragment. I was running on a path and cars were coming and going. It was all wet and slushy and the path got smaller as the mountain hill got steeper. I eventually got to a spot and I couldn’t go any further as it was private property. I went along the path the best I could and went past a couple. They began to try and question me why I was there what spot I owned because if I didn’t I didn’t belong there.

Dream fragment. I was in a hotel with a girl and we had sexy time. Eventually another guy came and slept in bed with us.
Dream Fragment. I was with different pro gamers and one of them was getting a hand job from a fan girl that had a big rack and was really good looking.
Dream Fragment. I was playing golf / baseball in a banquet room of a hotel but there was no gravity in the room. A person kept throwing balls to me and I would hit them back. There was person that came in with a group of people and she kept acting like she was 2 or three people by changing her voice and was answering her own voice. But eventually the voices were changing and didn’t match up anymore. So I asked her if she thought she was fooling us by trying to do that or what was going on.

I don't remember the first dream. All I remember is I was talking to a person in a room about something about dreams and it ended. I woke up at three thirty i think and went back to bed.
At that time I had a dream I was in my house but than suddenly it started to flood. So I ran out the house and appeared outside where there was stores and a big parking lot. To my side I could see a guy and a girl walking with a gun. So I ran all the way to the bus stop. There were people around and I asked a little girl which way was back. She told me to wait on the other side so i did.
I took the bus but when I got out i appeared in this room. There were two men standing and a lady in a pink performer costume balancing herself on the guys shoulders on a platform above. But part of the building began to collapse and they fell. Suddenly a guy with a gun came out. I guessed he was a bad guy so i tried to throw some small golden rocks i saw. But I missed and he shot me in the shoulder. I decided to try again and he shot me two times in the same spot...on my left shoulder and i fell onto the ground. It didn't hurt but i felt pretty stupid. That's when I woke up.
I thought about how those dreams sucked and tried to fall back to sleep. I did eventually and had a dream I was inside my house. I saw people playing a game like super smash bros brawl. I wanted to draw so i went to my brothers room and found a sketch pad and a sharpened pencil. But my brother yelled at me for taking his stuff. So I got mad and yelled at him and his friend. Than I left and saw my lil bro eating something. I got mad out of no where and started yelling about how i wanted food and that that was my food or something like that.[I've been having lots of dreams where i yell for food...I need to stop that...-w-]
Anyways I left the house and found myself outside. A pizza appeared in my hand and i took a few bites. A lady and her son who was a child came out and threw something in the garbage. I decided to throw the pizza away so i did. Than when I turned I saw a dark skinned old man walk out the back and walk past me. I asked the lady. Is that a ghost?[I don't believe in ghosts] She said no. I walked up to the open gate and closed it. After that i walked back to the lady. A random person walked up to us[I think it was the dark skinned old man] and said that people need to recycle more and need to start caring about what they do. Be more neat stuff like that. I was like yeah..Than I woke up. : P

I'm in a music shop, looking for a old vinyl disc of my dad.
My mother accidentally sold it and now I'm angry that I have to re-buy it double price.
As I'm still looking for it, a girl comes and I see she is interested in the disc I was looking for.
I approach her, but she hides the disc behind the back and she does not want to hear any reason, as she found it and the disc is hers!
I'm desperate and as last try I tell her that I have the first cd of Nirvana. She is a lot interested, but still does not want give me the beloved old disc.
St once she asks me to ask her out. I don't like her, but I do and she says 'okay, but you will pay my drinks'! I laugh.
We go out, without paying anything, and the owner of the shop closes it up and comes with us.
We go to a Nirvana concert but we sing U2 songs and everyone looks at us soooo weird! But we don't care at all.
I buy some tea drinks, but it tastes like milk and I wake up.

There are more dreams which were had this day but here are those that are shared here:

Prior to dreaming I was thinking of turning into Rainbow Dash.

I was seeing stuff in a river and was fishing for something, Something I was fishing for went by and then I went down the river where it went and swam back. Meanwhile I saw lava as if it was in Minecraft by the water, Making its hissing noise not turning into Obsidian but into something else.

I came back to the fishing area and there was green stuff on the river on top of the water and so the fishing area was not as big. Then (If looking at the river) I went to the right and looked up, Saw a room above me and used a grappling hook like in Zelda: OoT to get up there.

I went into a room (Minus walls and ceiling) and there were two gates on each side, That were doorways with iron bars that would come down to close them. They both closed with me inside and things or creatures came either inside through these closed doors or they came up to the doors and the room reset.

Bing! I was now Twilight Sparkle.

In the same room with the gates again (And there were computers in it) Princess Luna and Princess Celestia came up, One at each gate; Princess Luna came from the gate I came from which is now on my left and Princess Celestia from my right. Princess Luna said something like "Follow me and I'll give you fame/money/etc" and I (As if I were playing Team Fortress 2 on PC) hit a few buttons on the keyboard to say "No." I then faced Princess Celestia and she said "Find a way to escape the universe." And I said "Yes." The feeling is enlightening.

How does one escape the universe?

...

Later on I also dreamed of Kurt Cobain in a Sonic The Hedgehog costume in a building, Then he died and his body fell on its face and someone picked it up and tried to make it seem as if he wasn't dead but it just fell over again.

It's been a while since I last put a Dream Journal entry in, I've been out and about with friends playing music! I've been putting a lot of my focus on tantra also, since I had some sort of euphoric sensation overcome my entire body a couple of nights ago and I was wondering what on earth it was, it led me to tantra!

11th April -

Dream 1
Walking through a motorway type stone tunnel with a bunch of people, it turned into a busy stone hall but much tighter packed. I'm walking in the same direction as a lot of people, others are busily walking in our direction too. There was this guy who was walking next to me at the same time as this group of charity collectors pass me going the other way. The main collector asks me if I want to donate as he passes but I immediately tell him I have nothing to give, and he shoves me (I'm always charitable when I've got it, so this kind of behaviour annoys me). He keeps going, but the other guy who I mentioned was next to me says something offensive as a passive response to my having no money as to imply I'm tight, and I told him to fuck off or something long those lines. Further down the hall I'm walking into an open market type place, there are boxes of random toys and things on the floor and I have to step over them as I look around. Suddenly I turn around and the guy I told to fuck off before has the most insane keyboard in his hands, it's strapped on to him and he's holding it like a guitar, it was like a meter long black beast of an instrument, and he was playing some notes. He shouts to me that he's having it and there''s nothing I can do about it. Then the dream fades.

I was sleeping on a couch and woke up about 6 hours into my sleep and recalled that last dream. The light was coming through the living room window and there were buses loudly stopping and starting outside, it was quite noisy. I was quite uncomfortable too, the couch wasn't big enough to allow lying down fully stretched, so I was in the fetal position. It took me a while to get back asleep, my eyes were closed though, I was determined to get back to sleep even though I didn't feel too sleepy, and after 20 minutes I started to see some imagery appearing before me in the darkness, then I suddenly and very unexpectedly transitioned straight into a lucid dream, I was in a blurry room and it there was purple electricity flowing over half the stuff in the room. I didn't feel like I woke up in a dream and had to regain consciousness, I felt like I had literally just been lying on the couch trying to sleep and then all of a sudden I was in this room. I unfortunately came straight out of this dream anyway, and I was on the couch again.

So I tried again, I rested patiently for about 20 minutes, this time it seemed a lot longer to happen and I was getting a little disappointed until the imagery started appearing, then I knew it was game on. By imagery I'm talking about colourful neon type patterns swirling, which sometimes briefly transform into vivid objects. I've been practising dream schemas, thinking about what the patterns I'm seeing look most like, and therefore convincing my brain that that is what I'm seeing.

Anyway I went back into a new room, it was the same again - a transition with no loss of consciousness. This time I was sat on a bed and knew instantly I was dreaming, and I was calm. I looked around the room and it was more vivid than any lucidity I've had so far. There was a washing line sort of thing hung across the room with a football attached to it, and as soon as I looked at it I calmly thought about how I could change it into something. I decided to change it to a star, but looking at it and thinking I wanted it to change to a star did nothing. I looked away and repeated the thought, I wanted the ball to become a star, and when I looked back it was still a football. Then I woke up again.

With the two lucids I was trying to "open" my eyes as the imagery started coming to me. By open them I was not actually trying to physically open my eyes whilst keeping them closed, rather it was more of an embrace of all the imagery, as if I was accepting I was in a 3 dimensional space.


So that was annoying, that I couldn't change the football into a star. How will I fly if I can't even do that? I think the problem was that I was only thinking I wanted it to change, with little expectation of it actually happening. I didn't visualize it happening, I just wanted it to happen. Next time I'll have to "see" it change, and maybe it will.


13th April -

Dream 1
I was in a religion class with some old friends, they were all sitting about and smoking joints/playing games. The religion classroom transitioned into a bedroom without me noticing. I remember talking to a friend who used to body build but he looked really young again, like he did before his body-building days, and we talked about how it's a waste of time if you can't afford a good diet.

Dream 2
My dream log simply says "Dan spelling cat and" (I must have been very tired). I can vaguely remember a funny situation where my friend Dan was in a position of spelling something, and I was taking the piss out of him spelling the simple words cat and dog for him in a patronizing (but banterish) way.

Dream 3
I don't know what happened in this dream, except I know that there was a scene where I vividly heard words inside a dream for the first time. I was lazy in my logging efforts and have now forgotten them, in fact if I wasn't so sure right now about how I felt after I woke up that I heard vivid voices, then I would be convinced that I just feel like I have. Anyway this was unusual for me, usually I can remember being part of conversations in dreams but not actually hearing the words clearly, rather just remembering them. This time it was different, but I've forgotten the words so basically it doesn't even matter now haha.

The other sensation I felt in a dream for the first time was physical pain. I was unwrapping a bandage that was around my wrist, I think I had burned it or something, and I can vividly remember the feeling of the bandage being peeled off my raw skin and the stringing sensation of it. I hope it isn't possible to feel super physical pain in dreams, because if that happened to me with the mind I've got, I'd be fucked.

I haven't been on lately. I haven't been able to set aside much time because of school. Now that I'm on spring break, I'm briefly returning from my hiatus.

On to the dream:

The only parts I could remember are me sitting next to the girl I like (this is a different girl, BTW). It was actually on two or three separate occasions in the dream. She was even completely fine with it when I asked her. The seats weren't very big, so we were sorta pressed up against each other, which felt very, very, very nice.

One dream was, that a friend of mine invited me to come with her to a job, which would bring a lot of money, but it was something physical and outdoors and you had to dress warmly.
There were so many people at the gathering place - somebody said, our group would go somewhere else for another job.
This entailed sitting in the basement of a shopping-centre on long tables with a lot of other people - maybe even only women, not sure.

And it was handicraft - we were making/repairing Easter decorations - I had to fix new candles into some places, where old ones had burned down, which - typical dream - was pretty difficult.
In the end I switched and went about painting flowers - TOTM overspill, I'm pretty sure - so I painted unusual flowers on pieces of wood. Na well.

Then there is a fragment, where I'm with an ex-boyfriend from my youth at a frozen mountain lake.
He doesn't want me to go out - it's not completely safe, I could also see that.
But I went - bit also to daunt him - nothing happened, but I had to go back at one point, because cracks began to appear. No hectic or fear connected, though - I knew, I'd make it back safely.

Another fragment was being in my old childhood room, which I loved, and exactly at the right time, when the evening light would shine through my windows in a most beautiful golden way.
Bit more about me trying to get rid of some nasty furniture that had been stored there and properly moving back in.

When that dream ended - I had a mini-lucid moment, but no optics any more suddenly.
So I jumped in the air, like I usually do it, when lucid - and I had for a little moment the feeling of hovering. I stared into nothingness, hoping for a dream - but unfortunately I woke up then.

There was one more episode, where I went to university with two male friends of mine, and one of them said, women should undergo special tests before they enter - because most of them wouldn't actually do anything with their valuable (also financially) high education, but work as plaything manufacturers.
I swallowed - was after that job episode above..