non-lucid

I was with my younger son at a cabin of sort. There was a bookshelf of stuffier there, and I was told that almost all of them were regular stuffed toys except for the two eagles. At first I only saw one stuffie that was an eagle and it looked like nothing special to me. Then I saw the other one: it was actually made out of plaster, looked like a kid's art project, and it had a baby eagle with it. They actually looked more like owls, but everyone called them eagles. I was told the eagles were valuable and would soon be moved to the Smithsonian museum by curators who were trained physicists and thus very good.

When the curators came, the bookshelf was empty. I discovered that my son had a backpack full of stuffed animals, among others the stuffed eagle. I reprimanded him, but secretly thought how is a five year old supposed to know the difference between art and toy if this is art. He did not have the plaster eagle with baby eagle though. We discovered the plaster eagles in a bin full of blocks. They were in bad shape. The face banged up and no more mouth, nose, eyes. The curators who came to pick them up did not seem concerned though. Perhaps this could be fixed.

23:12 bedtime

00:00 Tuesday 2014-04-15

07:45

+ superhero flying/gliding/"spider" man. Flying/gliding down from parent's house. Some awesome high speed flying as approaching the city below, flying right through power lines I think I might hit some but know I'll make it through, land and ask about finding some place, there's a field of sand down the road.

Back at the house we're preparing the spider. My "power" is holding a very poisonous big (about the size of a fist) spider in a bag with me. I'm teaching my apprentice how to catch/lead the spider from their lair (in a bottle?) into the bag, leading it with some lure. The spider jumps on my right shoulder/face I feel it's claws digging in, I say get it in the bag! The apprentice grabs it using the bag and then squeezes/squishes the bag hard I say "No, you've killed it!" and the spider poison leaks out onto the ground forming a black pool.

Our cat comes up and starts licking/drinking the poison. I say "you've killed our cat!" the cat starts going into noisy convulsions and dying, it does this for a while, I say "well call the <emergency?> and find out how to ease its suffering."

I'm shaking the big sack/bag because I think the spider is just inside at the top, I keep shaking it and looking to see if I shook it down to the bottom, I'm doing this for a while until I realize it must have gotten out of the bag. I see it scurrying away on the floor and hiding underneath furniture, etc, I'm going after it pulling the house items out of the way to expose it and trying to catch it.

I'm outside on the deck talking with a woman discussing flying strategy/plans what's the best route to take to fly down to the city.

+ See friend DD I'm very happy to see him, he sort of drifts away, he smiles I see his teeth, they're distorted and long with brown roots like horse teeth, I think "he's gone long in the tooth," I see TZ with a distorted weird head on a tiny body.

+ MS from work, we're in car, all of a sudden in a casino, I hear the "ching ching ching ching ching!" of a slot machine, he's asking me what game is best to make his money last the longest, I'm trying to clarify what his gaming goals are.

+ wine bottles in restaurant/winery, I'm talking to representative there, they already have an exclusive bottling deal, I say how about I buy barrels of wine from them and bottle it myself, I see, touch, hold, look at bottles of wine from the shelf of the place, reading the labels, some dry red, some dessert red, imaginary grape names? I think a bottle may hold white wine but it turns out is also red.

+ sailing, see mansion garden in the distance with two sailboats, each circling around in their own pond, one (both?) have red sails. I'm talking about sailing with someone, trying to get another person interested in sailing, I say just take them out and get the experience of running into the wind, it's very exciting, I imagine it, then "hoisting the main jib?" (was thinking of spinnaker but not all ships have those) and just relaxing and going with the wind (and eating a sandwich?).

+ falling asleep in morning: thinking about levels of chess ability, see hillside of mixed green and brown grasses, something about needing to get/see the green grass.

14.04.2014

Tranquilizer Gun Fails, or I'm a Lousy Shot (DILD)

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID

I’m hiding behind a rock that’s probably 5 feet wide, and maybe 3-4 feet tall. I have a tranquilizer gun on me, and I believe I’m wearing a black tac suit as well. The environment resembles a jungle, and the ground itself had a color of white rock material that’s covered by all sorts of minerals, dirt, and grass.

The area’s pathway I’m on seems to be curved like a “C,” where if I were to reach the end, I would probably have to jump off from a pretty high elevation to get to the lower section of this area. I’m as the bottom end of the “C” shaped area, and there’s a soldier patrolling around the section farther away from me.

He looks kind of like a Panamanian guard that you would see in Splinter Cell: Chaos Theory, though I’m not sure if the design for the Gamecube version was different from the XBOX.

How I conceptualized the whole experience seemed to have involved me looking at my dream self through third person point of view, and occasionally feeling my dream body as well. I try to take my time to aim the tranquilizer gun at the guard, and it seems this experience in the dream had to be reset several times because I was either missing the shot completely, or I didn’t shoot him anywhere in the head to hopefully make him unconscious quickly.

One experience within the reset was that when I took a shot, and miss, some kind of random object launched its way over to the guard. The object was hard to see from afar, but I remember that it had a violet color with a slight overlay of blue. The guard turns around, looks alert, and isn’t hesitant in calling for backup.

I can visualize how said backup would arrive, and there’s soldiers wearing some kind of dark yellow camo outfit with brown spots spread around it, along with them wearing black masks where only their eyes are portrayed through a horizontal oval cut-out.

_________________________

14.04.2014

120 Subjects Learned? (DILD)

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID

Apparently, I tell someone that I learned over 120 subjects in High School and at a University.

Words come out of my mouth like crazy, and I felt like it was just coming by naturally without any intention of having to cover anything up. I think I stated I learned 110 in High school, and the rest at a University.

Even though the dream didn't make any sense, it's kind of true of how you barely learn crap at a University, other than:

Spoiler for university/college logic:

April 13, 2014: I am at a block party or outdoor gathering following some sort of contest or sporting event like a baseball game. I am happy with the outcome of the game, not so much because we won, but because of the poor performance of someone on the opposing team as his mistake(s) caused them to lose.

I leave the gathering to take a break from the party crowd and find myself negotiating/pushing my way down a crowded urban sidewalk, like 7th Avenue in NYC. I pass a movie theater. When I left the party, I did so without any money, phone or wallet, which, in my dream, I normally keep in some kind of wooden box on my person, as I did not expect to want to leave the party as I had done, nor did I expect to be gone for long.

I decide to go for a jog and end up on far eastern Long Island - Montauk Point. I run to a place on the edge of a body of water which is murky and crowded with reed grasses and bog-like plants typical of the edge of a wetland. As I stand there gazing into the water, what appears to be a large fish, perhaps 6 - 8 feet long, swims towards me, then, reaching a too-shallow spot, turns to its left and returns out of sight to deeper water. Before it is lost to view I can make out its large, plate-like scales and the mud-brown color of the fish. As it swims away I realize it is too big for a fish, and from the way it swims I realize it is an alligator. Although I see only the one, I know the water has many more of them in it.

In order to leave where I am standing, I must cross a decrepit, poorly maintained dock/bridge made out of pilings and planks, many of which are missing. The alligators appear to be aware of this and in my mind I strongly suspect that they are lurking beneath the dock waiting patiently and unseen in case I stumble and fall into the water. I run/jump competently and safely across the decrepit dock even though I am afraid and now I can continue my journey/quest which I now realize was to re-trace the final steps of a friend who had recently died.

I am far from home with no car, no money and no phone, so my only option is to continue jogging west towards home. I run through a series of ground-floor patios at what appears to be a cheap beach-side hotel/motel, passing underneath the balconies of the rooms on the second floor. The balconies are supported on their outer edges by what looks like raw, unpainted 6" X 6" wood studs. I jog leisurely past **** (name deleted-old girlfriend), who is talking with, and in the company of a man who is kind of young for her. I say something to him (which she can also hear) about her being unable to give love to him to discourage the relationship, because it seemed to me to be the truth. Neither of them seems particularly upset by my statement.

I keep jogging and encounter two women, one of which has a car. I ask her where she is going three separate times and she responds the same each time but I do not know/am not familiar with the town she specifies. I say “One more time?” and she says the name of the town one last time. This time I hear the name of the town but it does me no good because I do not recognize it or where it is in relation to ***(my home town), which is where I want to go. Since we are so far east, I conclude it is a virtual certainty that wherever she is headed has got to be generally west and will bring me closer to home no matter what, so I get in her car. In order to get in the car, I need to remove three sacks of what appear to be bags of concrete, which we leave on the side of the parking lot.

It is at this point that I realize that I have been jogging and visiting places trying to uncover the last movements of my friend before he died. When I exit the car, I meet with a man who was a mutual friend of the deceased who is also my friend as well. I begin to tell him about my efforts and journey and all that I learned about our mutual friend. He puts his arm across my shoulder as we walk and talk. I wake.

April 6, 2014: I am in a large parking lot, like a drive-in movie. I want to speak with an old girlfriend but I can’t seem to get at her. I go to take a shower, and I do. I need a towel, so my wife Lynne says I can use one of hers. I do, then wrap myself in it. I walk around and come upon a woman reclining in a chaise lounge or couch. I want to be physical with her, but when I caress her breast she complains that it hurts, so I give up.

There is a room with multiple small children on metal bed/cots with thin mattresses. They appear to be of African descent, and look malnourished and sickly. I am taking care of one, and other people are taking care of others. I want to use a stethoscope, but I don’t have mine, so I use one that seems to belong to the patient.

There comes a time when I want to leave, so I go to get my car. At the parking garage/lot, there is a wooden board with a clear Lexan cover, inside which the keys are hung on numbered posts. I pay my fee and give the attendant a $5.00 tip. The system for dispensing my key (# 111) doesn’t work right. The pin is supposed to retract, dropping the key to the bottom, and the bottom is supposed to open so you can retrieve your key as from a vending machine. A husky, dark skinned, foreign-looking guy behind the counter comes around and opens it from the top. Instead of being handed my keys, I am handed a plastic model of a car. I wake.

April 5, 2014: I am in a college dorm-like setting, looking for a place to wash up. I enter a bathroom which is pretty crowded with people and sports a wall of multiple sinks and mirrors, all in a line. I go to the crowded sink area and put down a tube of toothpaste behind the faucets and turn on the water. A guy speaking gibberish seems to object, but I gesture in a way that calms him down so I can soap up and scrub my face.

I wander around and the dorm-like scene morphs into more of a glass faced store front-restaurant with tables and chairs. I am deep inside this fairly large place 2/3 the way to the back right corner. Some gangster-like people come in and start shooting the place up. I lay down so that the bullets are blocked by a low concrete block foundation wall (about 2 -3 courses tall), and the bullets that go over the wall miss me completely. They are shooting a machine gun/automatic weapon that sprays bullets, but they do not enter more than a few steps into the restaurant, and they do not seem interested in seeing if or who they killed, so they step back outside. I am fine.

Now the store seems more like a Sleepy’s mattress store and I am laying behind a long impenetrable (by bullets) mattress, not a concrete block wall. As the gangsters prepare to leave the scene, I whisper to a woman who is also cowering nearby that people I refer to in my dream as “my girls” will get them. Lynne (and others?) arrive in an armored Hum-Vee-like vehicle with a gun mounted on the roof and seemingly save the day like an FBI Swat Team. Back in the store, it morphs back into a college-like setting where I decide that I will not take an experimental “psychedelic #2" (or “psychedelic B”?) due to these recent upsetting events.

April 4, 2014: I am in a house along with Lynne, but the house is not our own. There are other people there, and the plan is for us all to stay there overnight. I grow concerned and embarrassed that we may not be sleeping in the same bed, or even the same room and that people will know this.

I find out that a bicycle that I like was left by Lynne at a near-by beach. I go there to get it back. I park my car in the nearest available parking stall at the beach right at the curb near a sidewalk that separates the parking lot from the sand of the beach. My spot is very close to a kiosk of sorts. The spot I park in has a lot of sand on the asphalt, but the sand does not obscure the painted yellow lines, and I can tell I am legally and properly parked in a designated stall.

A male and a female park employee are at the kiosk-like structure, and they have the bike. The park people will not let me have the bike until I pay a fee for it. I get upset and make an argument that Lynne took the bike without permission and maybe even left it there on purpose because I had spent a lot of money fixing it up and making the pedal-bike resemble a motorcycle.

There is another woman at the beach who is willing to give the park people minimal money for the bike, and I shame her with words about trying to get something for nothing. The lady park person asks me if Lynne and I maintain two households (live separate and apart) and I say (truthfully) “yes” because evidently in the dream world we don’t live together happily like we do in real life. The woman park employee appears to soften towards me and whether she will give me the bike and is starting to grow convinced Lynne may have left the bike intentionally out of hurt/anger to punish me. I wake.

April 3, 2014: I and my crew are one of two factions aboard an airplane which is lost due to someone intentionally scrambling the original navigation start position and then making large, frequent unrecorded heading changes. I trust myself and my crew, but not the other faction.

We fly past a deli I recognize and I think I know where I am, but I’m not sure since the direction of flight is still unknown. I want to sleep but I don’t fully trust anyone who might be awake to make decisions or notify me of any maneuvers or position fixes made while I sleep. I wake.

March 26, 2014: This is the last fragment of a longer dream which I can’t remember: I am with a group of five or so people in a crowded place which seems like a street fair, outdoor festival or concert. We need a place to stay...but everything has already been booked. I say to the group that my wife has a place nearby, and we are suddenly there. The woman who plays Bernadette on the Big Bang Theory TV show barges into the ground floor apartment/condo which contains a bunch of things that a male occupant might have in his room, only no one is there at the moment. The door is evidently not locked, and Bernadette enters the apartment. One of the many things the male occupant had in my wife’s apartment was an abnormally long automatic assault rifle, which Bernadette comes out holding/wielding like a professional, but without firing it at all. I wake.

March 23, 2014: I am the driver of a car with two passengers on our way to a hobby shop. The hobby shop is located in a strip mall. I make a right turn off the road intent on going around or past a gas station, as I am not interested in filling up. Somehow, I end up at a gas pump in the gas station anyway.

I get out of the car to tell the black gas station attendant I don’t need/want gas, but he already has the filler hose in his hand so I release the gas cover lever/lock and allow him to put gas in.

Now we are in this hobby shop. My friend Mal S. is the proprietor. My companions and I spend some time in the hobby shop and I leave with several objects in my pocket, one of which looks like a sleeve of electrical wire staples with black plastic insulators which I think actually belongs to one of my companions.

Next, I find myself “at home” but it is strange and not altogether familiar house. My companions are gone, but they left on numerous lights in various rooms. I purposefully wander from room to room and shut off the lights, which all seem to shut off normally in response to their various switches, including a bedside table-lamp with the old-style brown plastic cylinder that you push “through” the bulb holder from one side to the other to operate.

I walk through the house after shutting off the bedroom lamp and I am chewing on a black plastic zip tie like a farmer with a piece of hay in his mouth. I wake.

March 22, 2014: I find myself in a comfortable medical setting. I have just referred someone to the doctor in whose office I am present. I am in the company of a somewhat obese Hispanic female. I am undressed, but not ashamed, and we speak while I get dressed. I do not have to search for my clothes, they are right there, and I step into my underpants, which are more like board shorts.

They want me to go see my own doctor - I’m not sure why. The unseen doctor seems friendly and concerned that my visit to my own physician will make me anxious so they offer me a prescription for a new, mild sedative with which I am not familiar. I say no thank you, but if they give me anything, I’d like Xanax. They are willing to give me a prescription for only two of the Xanax pills, which is fine with me. I wake.

Dreams I had this month or a month ago that I remember.
#0
[Dream training]

I was in a room with students around me. Than I left them to go to a invited party with my family. My brother and my mom and I entered the room. It was filled with tables with food on them. I was like yay! I wanted to eat some dessert with strawberries. But I saw that the foods were rotten and old. So I was like why are there old foods here!? My middle school teacher from years ago was assisting with the party and said something i don't recall. Than that's when my brother said that putting rotten food out was a stupid idea. That's when i began walking and saw a tall young man say to me. Hey, I remember you. i remembered the guy from a pizza dream of mine. He was so tall that i was like woah. Than jumped holding on to him. Than I let go and left that scene. I was taken into a small room where i was told my assignment was to get out. I looked behind me and saw a bear standing on his feet. I tried to trick the bear by telling it that there was food somewhere else and he left. Than I jumped way up onto something. I saw string and climbing material on the floor. I was high up and was told my next assignment was to get down first. There were other girls beside me trying to win. But I manged to get down first and won. After that I woke up I think....

#1

[The scary girl]

I was dreaming something I don't remember...than I walked into a room where it was a rectangle and there were tables around. A middle aged man offered me some wine and I told him no. I don't drink wine. Than I ran out the room and started walking. That's when I felt like someone was following me. A girl was behind me and when i got in the middle of the room I could see a girls picture on the floor. Than she started to laugh in a evil manner. I moved quickly and ran up some stairs. I could see a dark room with a figure of a person inside. It scared me so I ran again and the girl started to chase me. Saying I would never get out. When I was running through the hall I saw a room where there was a man who looked like Abraham Lincoln butchering a person on a table with two others. The girl cried out I would never escape. But I flew and tried to get out through the walls and I did. I tried to get on a train i saw but I was pulled back in the building. So I tried to fly through the roof. When i touched the roof and the girl was right behind me i appeared on my bed. Couldn't move until I tried to wake myself up and i did.

#2
[The stomach stab again...]
I appeared in a narrow long room with a red carpet after exiting a bathroom. I could see a picture of a blond lady with a pony tail. A voice spoke like a news reporter saying that Jenny was in trouble of being chased by bad men who wanted to kill her. I than proceeded to turn than walk. I could see a boy in a wooden seat. With a cup of clear blue water to his side. He wore a mask of that troll face picture i see on the internet and there was a small blue fire like thing floating above him. Another voice spoke saying "This boy waited for God and died from a terrible sickness." I was kind of scared than so I tried to get out the building but that's when small childlike Goku from dragon ball gt came out of no where and grabbed me. Than I felt someone stabbing my stomach. That's when I thought of my old dream with the little girl who did the same. Than a voice spoke saying I wouldn't escape. But I managed to escape goku's grip and that's when i woke up.

#3
[Ending to a dream]
I was at a school walking in a line with other students. When suddenly a huge guy from the line grabbed me than threw me to the floor. After that he stomped on my head. I could feel the pain in my dream. Than i appeared on my bed and a dark figure grabbed me and threw me under the bed and started beating me. After that i woke up and I was shaking in real life at times. So I started playing the 3ds to feel better and felt better a few minutes later. I've never had a scary nightmare like that. But I think I had that dream cause i was focusing on my head a lot the current week. Since sometimes i get anxiety when i see scary stuff on the news...-w-

#4
[In The Library]
I was in the Library with my sister and my nephew. There were other people around doing their own business. My sister turned to me and asked me to help her find a book for my young nephew. As I looked I saw a little girl behind my nephew. I than knew that I was dreaming and felt that she was the girl who liked to stab my stomach. So I said to her " get away from my nephew!." and she disappeared a bit. My sister came up to me and asked what was wrong. I told her we have to get out of here quick. That's when people started to leave the library like it was closing down. So we began to leave but the little girl came up to me and was telling me not to go. I said get away from me! as i followed the crowd through the hall. She said said she wouldn't let me. So I was like I believe in Jehovah! I don't believe in ghosts. And that's when she let go and i reached the outside. Outside i got on the bus but suddenly a boy ran up to me and said something i don't remember. I said no! Just leave me alone!. Than he said fine! I'll never bother you again! and left. On the bus I saw a girl crying for him in the third person and than saw words on the bus floor which looked like a song or poetry. Saying something about missing somebody. : P

Friday night 4/11/14

Some sort of apocalypse
zombies? inside a one-floored building
escape building with friends
into parking
lot cars on fire?

nighttime
get in car and try to drive off
one exit, missed it, stuck in a corner
get out of car
monsters chase us
I have a type of flail to fend them off

Saturday Night 4/12/14

Fragments:
in the west
hunting down next targets
django like feel
fun dream - wish i had remembered more. only remembered it today

Sunday Night 4/13/14

Dream 1:
in my house/room
saw a vacation trip online
tell friends
they dont want to go

i play music
i sing king of leon's "sex on fire"



Dream 2:
not sure if apart of one, but had a separate feel

In a neighborhood- small streets, no cars, kind of poor
accidentally reported an instagram post of a stretched out jerry seinfeld's face on my phone
messaged her because i felt bad

she responded saying not to worry
she also had written some poor english as a translation from korean

i wanted to speak with her face to face
went to her neighborhood, very close-by
saw a house that was build to look like a cat, more korean written on it. (not her house)

transition into night
neighborhood felt like a laser tag arena or something, a maze, movie set, large game board, some sort of contest
remember a PA system coming from the ceiling
statues of humans ( felt like monopoly peices) holding real popcorn bags

her house was kind of high on a hill in the neighborhood
tried to climb up it
wanted to give her something
part of the set broke off that i was trying to grab onto to climb up

her father and her came out of the house
dad told her to stay inside?
she fell down the set into a crevice

i was blamed, but i quickly forgot
wanted to grab a bag of popcorn from the statues' hands
others wanted popcorn too, was a race

Dream 2(?):
In church, brother was there

church ends
drive home
was sunday night (like irl)

brother talks about cat girlfriend got, how to bring it up right
old man says some broad comment like usual, thinks hes smart
brother agrees but isnt rude

I'm tied up in a chair, and this guy who was interrogating me is now struggling with another guy who wants to get me out. The guy on the rescue mission was carrying a needle, and during the struggle, the contents of the needle wind up getting sprayed into the air - they're behind me at the time, so I don't see it, but I can feel the spray, and I don't hear them fighting anymore.

The guy on the rescue mission's been captured. It turns out he got a small dose of the contents himself during the fight. This will cause something that we refer to as 'hunger', and he believes this is something he'll be able to use, to focus on his enemies. Having experienced it myself in the past, I know he's mistaken, and that it'll make it more difficult for him to think clearly.

We're both taken out of the building. Outside, we're in a junkyard, and there are a few men with guns escorting us. The guy on the failed rescue mission is starting to have a hard time walking, and one of the guards is shouting at him about it. I'm remembering a time in the past when I'd been out of it and he'd carried me. I'm aware I should do the same for him now, but I don't. I don't want to be associated with him.

Switching to third person, there's a kid watching us from a distance, out of sight. He leaves, gets on a computer and reports what he saw to a woman who I think of as the mother of my POV character, though she looks too young for it - long brown hair, upper-class British accent. In the kid's report to her, he mentions a "guy that you call the Judge" who's holed up in the woods nearby.

NON LUCID
*Liz was talking to somebody about how she throws away old food over her balcony. I thought that she really disgusting.

*I woke up and realized that my girlfriend was about to take a shower and that I needed to get to work soon. So I made a cup of coffee hung out for a bit which seemed like ten minutes. Then came up with the idea that I should smoke of cannabis before work just so I can enjoy myself. I never been high at work and wondered what this would be like plus I was in a really good mood. I took two hits from the bowl and started to feel really good. I thought wow I don't this much being in the bowl. Then it hit me I need to wake up. I guess you say I had a moment because I woke myself up to ACTUALLY go to work!

*Something to do with a huge office building.