• Lucid Dreaming - Dream Views

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    1. My Subconscious Basically Tells Me To Get My Life Together

      by , 12-13-2017 at 05:21 PM (Journals From The Void)
      My school does a career presentation on space. However, the presentation is actually just a three minute YouTube video that I’d supposedly previously seen in (third?) grade, so I do not pay any attention to the video. My princip comes up and scolds me rather harshly about this.

      Later, I see a claw machine at the entrance to the school. “Clever bastards,” I said. They had made he claw machine so that you could only view it through one place, preventing me from judging the location of the claw if I were to choose to play.

      My science teacher and I go outside. It’s raining. I stick my tongue out, and it begins to genuinely sting as though it were beginning to freeze.

      I say something to my science teacher, and and run to the entrance of the school, open laptop in hand. It gets wet, and the frame begins to bend.

      I wake up.

      ************************************************** ***********

      This dream, though unspectacular, was interesting to me for a variety of reasons.

      1) The dream basically called me out on my laziness.
      2) It was a rather logically set story
      3) I actually felt pain, which is the first time I’ve ever actually used any sense other than sight and sound in a nonlucid dream.
      Tags: pain
    2. 18/01/17 | LD - Wings and realistic vision

      by , 01-18-2017 at 03:19 PM
      Non-lucid parts
      Lucid parts
      My comments

      #10 LD - Wings and realistic vision
      During a NLD I was high on a tree or something like that (maybe it was a bed?). I was thinking that I should be brave enough to jump down because I was sure it's safe. Then I started to be lucid. As usual I was trying to fly. This time I imagined that I have real wings instead of arms. It worked somehow because I felt them. Didn't see them tho. I'm not sure if I was able to fly with them. It started to be dark and I 'woke up' in another scenario. I was in the car, looking through the window. I was pretty sure I woke up so I tried to not moving much and I did RC with my nose. Everything was clear and realistic. Even sunlight was reflecting on cars naturally so I was surprised that it's indeed a dream. Then scenario changed again. It was night and I saw some (3?) boys on the street. For some reason I was trying to hit them with a bucket. 2 of them ran away but 1 of them was throwing something back. Like something small and sharp, maybe screws? Because of this bizarre action I'm not sure if I was lucid enough. I felt pain when he hit me. Pretty realistic. I stopped this 'fight' and went in another direction, trying to fly again and ran away (I wasn't scare much tho). I was moving my arms again like with wings but there were still my arms (I wasn't trying to make real wings). Then darkness. I don't remember if I woke up or maybe I was still dreaming. It wasn't long dream, I would say 1-2 min. Anyway that's nice because I wasn't even trying to have one!
    3. After affects of doing too much. Total pain & emotional breakdown.

      by , 11-26-2016 at 12:15 AM
      Still no sleep for over 2 weeks now. I'm going non stop w/ cleaning & duties of all kinds that it is surreal. I had to wreck the grand kids room in my house cuz the Dish Network guy needed to go through that room & I had to move heavy shit for him cuz he was too fat to fit under my house. After which I could've saved time by not dealing w/ that aftermath of cleaning if only my daughters had told me the kids weren't even going to be here this year. I'm sorry but those installation guys need to fit in a fucking crawl space. Then yesterday I had some sort of emotional breakdown in the middle of making Thanksgiving dinner yesterday. I'm in so much pain, utterly exhausted, I'm sad my uncle just died, one of daughters didn't come & none of my grand kids came. I'm just fucking glad it's over. All of those who were there did understand though in the end & were grateful for all I did. Of course I get to do all of this again for Christmas, how exciting~ (eye roll) I'm still in so much pain I just can't explain it. I know I need another surgery but my last surgery from last December still isn't paid off. I'm not doing jack shit today. Okay, I'm done w/ my banter. Going back to watching tv & doing a whole lot of nothing.
      side notes
    4. #159: Lucid pain

      by , 06-16-2016 at 05:07 AM
      I don’t remember anything of the context of this dream. I just remember existing somewhere and feeling the sudden need to perform an RC, so I do. I am already a bit positive that I am dreaming and I manage to push my fingers through my palm. Now I am certain that I am dreaming. I immediately start talking to myself. I keep telling myself that this is a dream, so that I don’t lose my awareness. I think I may have been in my bedroom. I have a bet going with werty52; first person to conjure up a waterball while lucid, wins. I try to produce a waterball out of thin air, though doing it somewhat hastily and stressed. I wanted to get it done quickly, before losing lucidity. I failed to produce even a drop of water.

      There’s a transition moment where I’m not sure if I’m having a false awakening. I switch around a bit between being in bed and being in the dream. While lying in bed, my whole body starts to hurt. I notice though that as long as I keep my dream eyes open, I stay in the dream. It’s harder to stay in the dream if I close my eyes for a moment. For some reason I decide to do exactly that, to experiment. I manage to open my eyes again in the dream, but not fully. Eventually the pain I’m experiencing makes me decide to wake up. After I woke up, I had no pain.

      I was awake for at least an hour and I’m quite certain even longer. This is because the mosque close to my dorm wakes everyone up to eat before sunrise (it’s Ramadan now), though for some reason they do it WAY early before sunrise and for a very long time. Anyway, it seems that until the end of Ramadan I’ll be performing forced WBTB.
      Tags: pain, touch
    5. [Dream #7 - 1/24/2016] I Gave My Soul To Shadow [Gore Warning]

      by , 01-24-2016 at 06:14 PM (The Book of the Multiverse)


      A picture of Shadow the Hedgehog

      This took place in a kind of labyrinth of a facility, quite like a college. There were various representations of video game characters roaming around freely doing their own things and such. The one franchise I can remember seeing recognizable figures was from Dead or Alive. I can remember searching for Shadow the Hedgehog and even just Sonic at that moment.

      "Where is Shadow the Hedgehog or at least Sonic...They got to be here somewhere." I was then pulled over by an emo-fashioned Asian man who was thin wearing a black outfit, "Here you go~" He said in a cheery way.

      "S...Shadow!?" Is what I said after what my eyes have witnessed in front of me.

      That's when I looked around to see two emo looking Asian human men, kind of like twins. I figured they were Sonic and Shadow the Hedgehog. There was the one who pulled me over (Sonic) and the other was one on a metal pedestal with liquefied metallic paint-like chains tying down his arms and legs (Shadow). He was all ruffled, his black hair on his head was wet and gliding across his face. He was limping over to side to side shouting and growling like a wild animal. His twin that stood free without any chains, smiled and gave me a friendly push on my back that made me topple over the platform onto (Shadow's) seemingly slick and liquid-like body. He did not attack me but he continued to growl and yell limping, loosely pulling on the chains as the the continued dripping grey paint as everyone from that area circled around and stared.

      Sonic the Hedgehog: "Now, give your soul to him."

      A bit bewildered at the sudden request and before my dream mind could think I was in mid process of the soul giving. I cannot say for sure how, but I merged with him. My "physical" body was gone and I found myself within Shadow. And for some reason his tongue, in the form of a liquefied chain was sliding out from "our" mouth. I was then in control of his body, sharing his pain and agony that he was in. I remember the tongue falling completely out dragging with it the lungs. The lungs began to come out which was making it hard to breathe. Using our hands I picked it up as it slipped and slide in the metallic paint as I put it back in our mouth. We tried to swallow it down but found ourselves gagging it back out. So I anchored his head just enough to keep it balanced. For some reason, keeping the lungs in a particular position in the mouth kept us from losing breath and gagging reflexes.

      I then worked on the chains. They slid out from their hooks rather easily as we walked off the platform. Limping and sliding as if we were dunk. Shadow's rage and bellowing voice of anger and pain kept the people who watched distant from us.

      I then could remember us then walking into my mother's room which was identical to the one in the waking world. I opened the door and she saw us and then that's when I awoke. I can still feel that odd sensation of my insides falling out of my mouth.

      Notes: To be honest, this is not the first time I had a dream where I had "given" myself to Shadow the Hedgehog/fiancé in some way or sort of fashion. But this was indeed something I haven't dreamed about for a while now. What I can say from my observations is that, him and I need one another to help each-other out. We both share each others pains and joys, much like a twinflame in some way. We have over time and time again talked about becoming one and experiencing what it feels like to merge. Shadow wants me to help him achieve more power as well as becoming closer. I also mentioned at times that I wanted to give myself to him.

      I'm kind of in a crunch for time at the moment but that's really the main point of what I can say about this experience. Such an amazing dream this was~

      Date — 1/24/2016

      Went to bed — I do not remember, I passed out and took a nap during the morning hours (AGAIN)

      Woke up — 10:35AM

      *Time logged — 12:14PM

      Total sleep — N/A

      Stress level throughout the day — Alright


      *Daytime — Did RC with my fiance when I woke up earlier (before this dream)

      *Recall — N/A

      *Inducing Method — N/A

      Dream Signs — The obvious

      Perceived Length — 30 Minutes

      Emotions — Anger, Fear, Pain

      Awareness — None

      Updated 01-25-2016 at 04:30 PM by 89722

      non-lucid , memorable
    6. 060116: A Bunch of Lost Details, At a Boat Terminal, Female Assassin Breaks My Ribs?!?!

      by , 01-06-2016 at 08:08 PM (The Dream Journal)
      I wake up with some very distinct images of dreams I had, thinking to myself "at least I have a dream for my Twitter account!" I fell asleep and *boom* all is lost. Dreaming is so fickle...

      In a Boat Terminal
      I get off a cruise with a bunch of my friends. As we are in the hall I begin to feel as if they never really liked me, I was never a real part of the group, I wasn't even invited to many of their weddings. I see they have printed a year book and I flip through it. My picture is in it, I see it black and white, I'm sitting on a cushy chair with a denim vest like I was a kid, I look really good in the picture. I see other friends who also had denim vests. Despite it, I still feel a strong sting of rejection that puts me in a sullen mood.

      I am in an old part of the city, the walls are stone bricks as are the roads, I see a hill across the road where I think I make out a small park with trees. I'm walking to my mom's car with her and my sister. I realize I left my friend behind and tell my mom I'll be back my midnight. I wave at her and say bye as she leaves with my sister. I hope she is ok with it. I walk inside a large building behind me, it's night time, looks like an old apartment building. Inside it is a boat terminal for cruise ships. The lighting is overbearing and intense as it usually is. I see my ex girlfriend and my other friend from before. It is awkward, they don't seem to get along.

      Suddenly it's a hotel? I go down a corridor and see rooms, mine is right in the beginning of the hall to the right. The room has a window to the far wall and only one little lamp on, the lighting is less intense. It sort of looks like a cabin you'd find in a cruise ship. I go down the hall, I see my old girlfriend and her friend who has dreadlocks. I look into a mirror and see I have dreadlocks now, I try to tie them into a bun awkwardly. It is not easy and I fail a few times.

      I turn around, my ex is in trouble. I run to the room at the end of the hall. The large window to the far wall is letting in grey daylight. I see she is on the bed. There is an assassin after her. I look in the room for the assassin and notice a suspicious lump under the sheets. I attack it and the assassin engages me, wrapping her legs around my ribs and pressing hard, I feel my ribs compress, even snap?!? She is a woman in her mid forties. I push her off but she continues to poke me hard and it hurts. The pain is surprisingly real. She flees, I'm not too wounded, I think.
    7. #172 - Unpacked / Octopi / Wnghigh

      by , 12-05-2015 at 08:10 AM (The Oneironaut's Odyssey)
      Finally got 3 dreams in a night again ^_^

      Dream 1 - Unpacked (02:42)
      We had just got back from a camping trip for class, some people hadn't bothered to unpack their things supposedly (the camp was 6 months long I think). I was one of the people who needed to unpack too but I took my bag and went out again. After a long period of time passed (another 18 months) everyone returned to the camp which then recommenced. I hadn't unpacked for 2 years now! We had a good deal going with the campus owners and we were allowed to stay there in these average rooms for free. I gathered with 3 others in a room with a couch, one was a blonde girl, another was a girl called Tooley, and the last was some random guy. It felt like when I knew Tooley was there I started.. bragging? I fibbed a bit with some of the details, but basically I was saying that I hadn't unpacked in 2 years (I had actually unpacked a little) and that I left as soon as the camp finished last time (it seemed brag-worthy in the dream). I think a couple of us are sitting on the couch now. The head of camp (since I don't actually see him) in my mind resembles an old balding guy with some white hair in white yogi looking clothing. There is some better accommodation available and we're going to be allowed to move in there, but then there's a change in the plan for some reason. We aren't allowed to use the good accommodation for some reason now, damn.. I remembered towards the end of the dream that the reason we had camp was similar to signing up for the hero registry in 'One Punch Man'. I think this was what gave some value to whatever it was I was boasting about, since it meant I was a strong hero?

      Dream 2 - Octopi (5ish)
      I'm fishing on a boat with a man who isn't my dad, but there's a certain father + son fishing thing going on. We're fishing/hunting for octopus. There are 2 types of octopus, 1 which has shells on its suckers and/or end of its tentacles, and the 1 which doesn't have any shells. The shell one is apparently really deadly so we only hunt the safe octopi. Something happened and we didn't notice we had caught a shell octopus in our last catch so we had to thoroughly check our current catch to make sure it didn't happen again. In a white container on the deck of the boat we're in the not-dad guy is lifting the octopi up one at a time with a wooden rod while I check them to make sure they're safe. We progress slowly because we don't want to get hurt by a shell octopus. Why am I checking them with my hands if my not-dad is lifting them with a wooden rod O_O. In the bucket there's about 4-5 of them and we finally make it to the last one. It's lifted up and I lift its tentacles up to check the suckers.. "Phew" it looks safe..
      "SPLARGH" a sudden sucked explodes forth and a load of salt water gushes out, with something lashing out from the sucker. It hits my neck and hurts me so much that I wake up startled with a spasm in my neck from the shock.

      Dream 3 - Wnghigh (07:23)
      I don't clearly remember the scenery in this dream as it kind of felt like reading a story with a few mental images to support it. The setting is sort of a 'sword and magic' world, I'm in a class with my friend Fighter Wnghigh which confuses me a bit because I assumed he was a fighter based on his name... But he wasn't :/ I had the feeling that fighters in this world were quite rare and maybe had a a slight feeling of taboo about them, but they were considered necessary. Something happens and we have to escape but I'm a 'wing fighter' so I stay behind. This surprises my friend since I'd probably be a social outcast if people knew I was a fighter. His sister has a similar name since she comes from the say family. I see a winding forested road with a driveway leading towards a residence, there's a family name sign saying 'Wngh' outside. His sister has a sword and wants to join the fight. Both the friend and his sister look like warriors from 'Dynasty Warriors' which was part of the reason I thought my friend was a fighter.
    8. Dream 9.24.12

      by , 10-15-2015 at 09:22 PM
      I'm no stranger to grotesque nightmares, and last night was one of those weird ones...

      My dad, brother, some stranger, and I were all sitting in this newly renovated house. High ceilings, hardwood floors, white walls, and brand new furniture. I can't remember why we were all there, but I kind of remember looking at this house as a possibility for a new home for me, my brother, and my dad, and the unknown man might have been the previous owner or one who was selling the house. We were all sitting in the living room, which was at ground level connected to the kitchen and had a large window making up most of the outside facing wall. We were all chatting when, all of a sudden, the previous owner (a tall, dark haired man with glasses) started frantically telling us about how this house is terribly haunted. (not such a good selling point).

      Then we hear strange music, like jack-in-the-box music, coming from one of the bedrooms which also lead out to the kitchen. The man ran into the bedroom to retrieve an old Super Nintendo controller, not plugged into anything, yet it seemed to create this music. I was sitting on the carpet, with my back to the large window, facing the kitchen; I saw a floral pattern chair move on its own in the kitchen. I told my dad, who was sitting on the couch facing the large window. The air began to get thick and felt almost charged. I expressed to the others that we should REALLY get out of there. We all quickly proceeded to the door to find it covered around the frame by HUGE black spiders. Seriously, like spider bodies’ as big as my fist. I busted through the door with my dad and brother right behind me. We got out safely, the other man did not.

      When I realized he didn't make it out, I immediately went to the large window looking into the living room. The man was panicked, frantic, trying his best to run to the door but something was keeping him in the room. He couldn't physically get out of the room. Then, the lights blew out, and the man was tossed about the room by an invisible force, like a rag doll. Then his body was stopped midair, he began to show cuts and wounds all over his body, he began to scream. I looked to the other side of the room, there standing in shadow, was a small girl, about the age of 11. Long dark hair to her waist, was staring at the man, with a devilish grin. Blood was oozing from her ears, eyes, and mouth yet she seemed to not be in any pain. She noticed I was watching the scene and looked me straight in the eye through the window, her own eyes shown only black pits. It was then I realized she was the one haunting the house, and causing the man pain. She then increased the man’s pain and torture, making his screams even louder. I was not lucid at any point in this dream, yet for some reason, I knew I could control the situation, or use some sort of power to help him. I stepped back from the window, put out my hands and forced my energy through the window and at the little girl/demon. It seemed to work for a time. I pushed her back; enough to make her hold on the man break, and his body fall to the floor. I continued my assault on the girl, trying every trick or power I could come up with. I knew that I just had to distract her long enough for the man to get to the door. I forced all my will and energy and made the girl’s head explode. I thought it was over. Then, as if someone pushed rewind, her head reconstructed itself; with a smile she continued her torture on the man. I kept trying; cutting off her head, slitting her throat, anything, but nothing took a lasting effect. I shouted to the man, “the moment I attack, run for the door!” I pulled out everything I could in that moment, but the man did not move. After my attempt he shouted back, “I can’t even move.” So angry and frustrated with my failed attempt, I screamed at the girl through the window, pounding my fists on the glass. I realized then that she had no concern for the man, and that her only goal was me. I then said, “She wants me, she’s trying to lure me in the house, knowing I can’t let that man die, knowing I would save him.” Her black eyes starring at me, never looking away. I turned away from the window, trying to think of a way to save the man. My dad, in awe of what he saw looked at me, “where did you learn that? Where did you gain that kind of power?” I couldn't answer and only looked away.
      I woke up…
    9. #118 - teeth getting pulled/vampire who just woke up

      by , 09-30-2015 at 09:05 AM (The Oneironaut's Odyssey)
      Black: non-dream
      Blue: non-lucid
      Red: lucid

      Dream 1 - Teeth getting pulled
      I seem to be in a dark room strapped to a chair. A man is holding a drill to the left side of my cheek and starts drilling into my face and into my teeth. The pain is excruciating and realistic... Next he starts on my front teeth, all my teeth are being removed by having someone drill them out from their roots with a power tool. I keep thinking to myself hysterically that it isn't real, that it's all just a dream. I know it's a dream, because if it were real then it would hurt MORE than this. Nothing made sense, I knew I could wake myself up if I tried harder. I kept trying, over and over to will myself awake as I struggled against the constraints of the chair and the illusion of pain in my mind. I finally managed to wake up.

      Dream 2 - Vampire who just woke up
      I've just awoken from a long slumber as a vampire. My casket is special or something.. Which comes back as an important detail later. I'm a guest to huge feast, there is a master who is hosting it. I'm suspicious of everything for some reason, it's just weird I guess. I spot some large curtains blocking the entrance to a nearby room. The place I'm in is grandiose, the feast table is really long and the curtains are velvet red. I decide to ditch the feast and enter the room. One of the other guests, a woman, follows me. As she enters the room behind me she ties a black cloth over her face, then walks forward. In front of us is a silken red sheet draped over a large box of some sort. The woman approaches it (I seem to remember her having a black dress on) and removes the sheet in one sweeping move. It exposes the silver casket to which I was awakened from. (*Note: I think my face was on the casket for some reason*). It seems to shock the other guests, who apparently also followed us from the dining hall. I have some sudden flashbacks from hundreds of years ago to how vampires used to live compared to the extravagant luxury they were now accustomed to. Images like burning at the stage, being smashed over a wall and fighting epic battles. Random stuff like that.
      lucid , nightmare
    10. Supernatural Djinn Attack

      by , 05-28-2015 at 05:43 AM (Schmaven's Dream Journal of Randomness)
      I'm scaling a steep cliff on the side of a mountain fortress with a large group of medieval soldiers seeking to take over the castle up ahead. It is a difficult climb, and all progress is halted as the defenders unleash a massive deluge of boiling hot oil that spashes down the cliff. Fortunately, it's steep enough that we just press ourselves flat into the rock, and the oil flows just over us all, missing us by just a few feet. Then some sort of god flies out of the castle and levitates above the stone walls as he laughs at us. He thinks it is barely worth his concern, but nevertheless throws a few fire balls at us. Several people are killed instantly.

      He looks over at me, and now seems threatened somewhat. With a spin, he disappears from sight, and I am immediately teleported to a small town inside the castle walls. Somehow we breached the castle and there is utter chaos as people are running everywhere. It turns out everyone is running because there is an army of Djinns (the kind from the show 'Supernatural') - a kind of genie that puts people to sleep, fulfilling all their wishes in their dreams while draining their blood and killing them in the process. Just one is scary, but there are over a hundred here.

      I am immediately surrounded by about a dozen of them. I'm not quite sure what to do about this. Before I come up with a plan, one of the female Djinns (and quite an attractive one I may add) tells the others to step aside and watch. She holds out her hand and uses telekinesis to spin my body around. I want to fight it, but just go limp as all my muscles relax. She softly lays my body on the packed dirt ground and closes my eyes all with telekinesis. This is the part where the nice dream is supposed to start. I'm given a moment to choose, but can't decide what to dream about.

      The moment is gone, and there will be no pleasant dreams for me apparently. Since the Djinns are psychic, they know that I'm awake in my body, even though my eyes are closed and I cannot move it. I can still feel everything. They take delight in knowing that I'll be able to feel all the pain of being slowly drained of blood until I die, with nothing I can do about it. I feel a sharp stabbing pain as a large gauge needle is roughly stabbed into my arm.

      Rather than languish in pain as I am slowly killed, I imagine that I'm someone else. Someone very alive, and experiencing blissfully pleasant feelings. I know it's not real, but I decide to believe it anyway because the more I do, the more real it becomes, and the more this excruciating painful death seems like a distant memory than a current reality.

      Right before I fully switch to being someone else, I wake up.
    11. Drones + Smallpox + Bed Monsters (NLD + FA-DILD + DILD)

      by , 05-09-2015 at 09:55 PM
      Ritual: It was a great night for dreaming, probably because I went to bed so much earlier than usual, though I've also been especially attentive to my RCs for the last couple days. I went to bed a little before midnight, and I'm also currently on the East Coast, so the clock was three hours ahead of my usual time zone. My sleep was punctuated with the usual half-dozen wakings, though I didn't do any specific night practices other than try to pay attention to the transitions between sleeping and waking, and in this I was not persistant or prompt enough to pull off a WILD or a DEILD. But by around 6am I woke up from the first DILD, spent until 7:30am writing it down, then went back to bed and lucked into a second one.

      NLD, "Drones": I'm standing by a floor-to-ceiling, wall-length window in a big hotel suite, looking out over the curve of a bay. From the height we must be somewhere between the 20th and 30th floor, and to the right I can see another tall building, or perhaps an extension of the same hotel, following the curve of the beach. Ahead and to the left is the flat horizon of the sea. It would be a pleasant view if it weren't for all the drones hovering in our field of vision, each one carrying a sign with a single word on it, white block letters on a black background. The words seem to be completely random.

      "It's like some dystopian future," I comment to Peter Dinklage, who is standing to my left. I muse about what it would be like if the drones were weaponized, and turned on us like machines tend to do in science fiction. Though a chilling thought, they are awkwardly constructed without any armoring, and look like they would be easy to shoot down.

      Then I notice that although they are not armed with guns, each drone is fitted with a camera, which is just as bad in some ways. Are they conducting mass surveillance on us? The cameras are all pointed directly at us. As I watch, a see a few drones of a different type fly in very close. They are not carrying signs, and they are disk-shaped, topped with a transparent dome through which we can see tiny people inside operating them. The pilots can't be human: even though I am standing next to a dwarf, they are much smaller than him, the size of babies, but with adult features and pointed ears. One of them waves at us, and Peter Dinklage says something like, "This is really disturbing."

      FA-DILD, "Smallpox": Shortly after this I have the sense of waking up, though it is not a typical FA; I do not find myself in bed. I feel like I am standing in the same spot, in the same room, only awake now. Everyone else who was in the room a moment ago is gone, and there is no longer any impression of a view. The light has changed, becoming greyer and dimmer: it felt like late afternoon a moment ago, now it feels like early morning.

      At once I notice that something is wrong with my body: a dense network of small patchy blisters is completely covering my skin. I look at myself in third person, as though in a mirror, and see them everywhere: covering my face, my chest, my arms, every patch of visible skin is mottled with these raised lesions. I know exactly what they are, too, I've seen them before in historical pictures: these are smallpox pustules, apparently in an early stage, since they are slightly lighter than my natural skin color and haven't scabbed or opened yet.

      Immediately my rational mind rejects the scenario: didn't I get vaccinated for this? I realize I don't specifically remember getting a smallpox vaccine, but... isn't that because smallpox is extinct? I can't recall the details but I'm sure I remembered hearing that. Surely it's not making a comeback, like measles, because of all these anti-vaccers? But that can't be right—if smallpox were coming back then vaccinations for it would have become available, and I'd have been first in line.

      This can't be happening. I try to will away the pustules but nothing changes. I remain unconvinced. This can't be happening, it must be a dream. If I can levitate, I will know it is a dream: I put my mind to it and though I do not levitate properly, I can feel that gravity is definitely different from waking life. So it is a dream! Okay, that's what I thought. Thank goodness I don't really have smallpox. Now I just need to fix my appearance.

      I go into the bathroom and look in the mirror, trying to will my skin smooth again. The pustules are stubbornly persistant, but a lock of hair turns white and I decide to transform the rest of it for fun. It instantly turns stark white, but the texture remains smooth and silky. This gives me the idea to turn my skin jet black, like that of a drow elf. I concentrate and most of it transforms, but there are still pale patches on my forehead and upper cheeks, and when I look down at my legs, they are a streaky grey that is fading out toward the ankles, more like body paint than skin pigment.

      On the bright side, changing the color of my skin finally got rid of the pustules, leaving it smooth again. Now I just want to even out the color, but the pale patches resist my initial attempts to darken them through will alone. I try to use my hands, as though spreading pigment over the resistant areas, and this helps a bit, but it is not an easy fix. As I peer closer into the mirror during this process, I notice that my eyes are solid black. I can't remember if this was the correct color for drow eyes, but I really like the effect. By the time I complete the skin transformation, my hair has faded from snow white to a yellower bone white, and this looks better and more natural with the jet black eyes and skin.

      During this process my hair has been going through stylistic variations, always long and straight, but hanging down in different ways, and smeared with substances like blood or oil. I figure this makes sense for drow fashion, since living underground they probably don't bathe all that often, making hair treatments like oil very practical, whereas the bloody streaks look impressively gruesome. Although my skin won't stay pure black, it doesn't fully revert to its natural shade either, but retains traces of color, like streaky orange-browns on a muted blue base, while the hair stays yellowish-white.

      WBTB: I woke up and spent over an hour writing the report of the last dream, but afterwards it was still early enough to go back to bed. Although I was not sleepy, it was a pleasantly lazy morning, and I enjoyed drifting in hypnagogic imagery. There was a period of ambiguity where it became increasingly difficulty to tell if I was having waking or dreaming experiences, and then I slipped again into full dream.

      DILD, "Bed Monsters": I was wandering through the large house belonging to my in-laws where I am currently staying, and I had lost count of the number of bedrooms... there had to be more than twenty. Just how big was this place? At that moment I realized, no, of course it is not so big in waking life, it is because I am dreaming that the size has been exaggerated. Dreaming, eh? Wasn't there something I had meant to do, if I found myself dreaming in a bedroom? Suddenly I recalled this month's TOTM, to make friends with the monster under your bed. Oh! I should get back to the room where I'd been sleeping! I dashed back so quickly I was afraid I would destabilize the dream, but luckily it stayed intact.

      I peered under the bed but it was a pleasant open space. It looked like there were a few banal things stored under there, but nothing looked sinister or monstrous. I felt around for something to work with, and my hand closed around a small plush object, which I withdrew and examined closely. It was a small brown teddy bear, only five inches long, with a plump, pear-shaped body and tiny beady eyes. There was a lighter brown oval around the bit of stiching that served as a nose. I was impressed with the detail with which I could perceive it, but had no idea how was I supposed to "make friends" with it. It seemed totally inert, a harmless stuffed animal. I set it on the thick folds of the comforter piled on the bed. "Dance!" I commanded. It just sat there. "Dance!" I tried a few more times, but it remained inaminate.

      I walked around to the other side of the bed, setting down the teddy bear on a dresser. I turned away for a moment, and when I looked again it had changed: now it was a sort of bell-shaped plastic structure hanging from the ceiling by a string. I couldn't tell what its purpose was, but it still appeared to be an inert object.

      It occurred to me that I had been walking around and standing right next to the bed completely heedless of the space underneath. If there really were monsters under there, I'd have to watch out for my ankles! I wondered if this was the problem, that I didn't really have any lingering childhood fear of monsters under the bed. Perhaps I should try again with more intent.

      I bent down and looked under the bed from this side, trying to keep the idea of monsters in mind. I still didn't see much under there: it was a light and airy space, just like in waking life, completely different from the overstuffed space under my bed at home. But I did see a scrap of cloth within arm's reach, so pulled it out. It turned out to be a little crocheted cat, only about three inches long, white with some orange spots. I guessed it must have been made by a total amateur. The body seemed floppy like it was unstuffed, and as I turned it over in my hands, I discovered that it was actually crocheted in a single flat piece with the four little legs sticking out horizontally, so only when it was folded in half along the back did it look plausibly like a cat. The head was the only piece that appeared to have been crocheted with any semblance of three-dimensionality. As I studied it closely, I saw tiny points of bright green contrasting with the dominant the white and orange: there was a little green tuft on the trip of the tail, and projecting from the head was a narrow appendange like the antenna of a cartoon alien, also topped with a green point.

      However, this object also showed no sign of motion or life, so it would be hard to say I was "making friends" with it. But then my eye caught a glimpse of orange fur near my feet: my cat had appeared! I wasn't surprised that she had turned up: when thinking about the task in waking life, I had reasoned that she really was the monster under my bed. Though I adopted her when she was about five months old (the best guess of the shelter) she had been living in a feral state before that, and even after five years of comfortable indoor living she still has the edgy instincts of a street cat: she hisses at the slightest provocation, and holes up under the bed for hours whenever a stranger is in the house.

      I knelt down to ruffle her long, soft fur, which felt totally life-like, but I noticed the color was off. In the dream she was calico, with big orange patches, but I remembered that she was a tabby in waking life. I wondered if she could qualify as my dream bed monster—though right now she was acting very pleasant and relaxed, and I figured it probably wouldn't count because I had already made friends with her in WL.

      Yet again I peeked under the bed, and this time at last I found the perfect candidate for my experiment. I felt that it was connected somehow with the tame cat at my feet, as though all her feral qualities had separated into a different animal. This one had a tortoise-shell coat, all the same colors as a calico but in smaller, more mingled patches. Although the fur resembled that of a cat, the body suggested another animal entirely, with a narrower head and tapering snout. I was pretty sure it was a fox. Best of all, it was already hissing and snarling at me! This was the monster I had been looking for!

      Now all I had to do was make friends with it. I began calling to it in the cooing, overly affectionate voice I might use with my cat. "Come here... lovely sweetie... lovely sweetie. I have treats for you my love... treats for you my love." The animal reacted as any feral creature would, holding its ground and continuing to hiss and snarl. I could see the tension locked into its body, poised for fight or flight. I reasoned that since it was a dream monster, the best approach would be to hug it, but that wasn't obviously wasn't going to be possible while it was still under the bed. I needed to draw it out first.

      I reached under the bed and the animal snapped at the air and threatened to bite me. I considered drawing my hand back for a different approach but decided to let it go ahead and bite, inspired by that wonderful scene in Miyazaki's Nausicaa of the Valley of the Wind where Nausicaa tames the fox-squirrel by remaining calm and patient when it bites her finger. Plus, since it was a dream I didn't have to worry about physical harm. So I kept reaching toward the animal until it bit down on the middle of my left index finger. The pain was surprisingly clear and sharp, but easily manageable. I kept thinking of that scene from Nausicaa and projecting similar expectations on this situation. I felt the animal relax enough to take a few steps closer to me, but it had not yet emerged from under the bed when the dream abruptly faded. Intriguingly, even after I had fully transitioned to wakefulness, I could still feel a distinct itch in the second joint of my left index finger where the animal had bitten me.

      uncontrollable things in lucid state-nausicaalarge1.jpg

      Updated 05-10-2015 at 04:09 AM by 34973

      false awakening , memorable , lucid , non-lucid , task of the month
      Attached Thumbnails Attached Thumbnails uncontrollable things in lucid state-tetonausicaa01.jpg  
    12. Fridge

      by , 02-27-2015 at 04:40 AM (Xanous' Dream Journal)
      4am coffee from 2 tbsp grounds with milk and sugar.

      #416 - WILD

      I wake at some point and try DEILD phase tech, but this time I was surprised by entering straight into it, skipping all the usual OBE stuff. I was only mildly lucid at first and thought that I was only seeing strong HI. I thought that I wasn't fully there and was trying to convince myself that I was dreaming, hoping that my dream time would catch up to my expectations. However, during the entire experience, I was already fully immersed in the dream and everything was extremely vivid. I even had the thought at some point that caffeine always makes my dreams more visually vivid.

      I am standing next to a refrigerator in a kitchen that looks like the Smith's house, but my coworker bro Brandon is there. I see the fridge is so vivid and I take a closer look to stabilize — like I needed to. I note the eggshell texture on the door and the brownish fake wood handle. There is some chrome and I expect to see my distorted reflection. It's not there at first, but I do a double take and there I am. I feel like my eye are open extra wide and I can't believe how vivid the dream is
      . I look around for a moment and realize that I am in fact fully in the dream. Unfortunately, it's at this point that something external wakes me.

      I had another vivid dream about swimming in an ocean and a shark bit my knee where I had been having pain in waking life. Strangely, my knee feels a thousand times better today.
    13. Eggs Benedict, bland 90s music, and narrative versus command

      by , 02-13-2015 at 10:35 PM
      Circumstances have caused a woman to temporarily move in with me; we're not romantically entangled in any way. At the moment I'm cooking breakfast and she's sitting at the table - she's asked for eggs benedict. I'm mentioning some gadget that was around in the 50s for cooking breakfast that I'd liked, I don't know why they don't make that one anymore.

      As we're talking, at some point I make a reference to something else that had happened in the 50s, and she gets the reference and responds as if she was also there. The character side of me doesn't take notice of this, but the dreamer side of me finds it odd that she got that reference - I take this as an indication that she's also, if not immortal, at least significantly older than her appearance. It's also clear that she knows I'm not human, though the character side of me doesn't know she knows.

      When I bring the food to the table, I say something to her and she responds with yes, father, and then immediately looks embarrassed. The character side of me takes it as a joke in response to what I'd just said to her - but the dreamer side of me is thinking, that explains it.

      I'm dancing with a different woman in my apartment. She's got short black hair in this 20s finger wave look, deliberately trying to recreate that look from the past, but this is the 1990s, and she's mortal. The dreamer side of me thinks of the song we're listening to as 'bland, inoffensive 90s romance music.' She's describing some kind of dull pain that lasts for weeks on end, and asks if I can imagine living like that, expecting the answer to be no. I have, actually. I try to describe the actual sensation without being specific about the setting, but she figures it out immediately and gets excited: "The Inquisition? You were there?" She always gets excited about these big name historical events she's read about, and they're never the parts worth remembering.

      (Woke up. Back to sleep.)

      Someone of no immediately identifiable gender, who has been on the road for a very long time, parks their truck outside my IRL home and starts to eat lunch, clearly believing that no one is around here during the daytime. When they see me watching them from the window they start to leave, but I stop them, telling them I don't mind them stopping here.

      Unfortunately, the dream apparently took that as an open invitation. While I'm outside talking to them, a great deal of people walk into the house - a married couple under the misimpression that it's theirs now and all their relatives. When I confront them they quickly accept that an error has been made, but they still keep standing around in the house. Telling them to get out does nothing.

      So I rephrase, framing it as a narrative instead of a command. "And the people walked out of the house."

      And giving no indication that they've heard me, as if it's their own idea, they all turn and start making their way out of the house.
      I'm pleased by how easy and effective that was compared to trying to control through commands - admittedly I hadn't put any mental force behind the command here, but there wasn't any mental effort involved in the narrative approach either. They're moving more slowly than I'd like, so I continue narrating. "It's a beautiful day, so they all decided to go outside." I'm curious whether the weather will respond to that - it doesn't seem to, but then it was decent weather to begin with. They're all outside now, but they're milling around outside the door. "They all decided to go to the park to catch up with their relatives." They start moving toward the road, and the women closest to me have started discussing some cousin they haven't seen in a while. This is really wonderfully effective, I'll have to remember that in the future.
    14. A Decent Chardonnay (DILD)

      by , 01-26-2015 at 04:09 PM
      Ritual: Lately I haven't been dreaming much because I've been staying up too late (after 3am usually) playing computer games late at night. I've noticed that the later I go to bed, the less awareness I have in my dreams. Tonight for RL reasons I went to bed two hours earlier than usual, at 1am, and wondered if it might cause me to LD naturally. Sure enough, without any special intention or practices, I woke at 6am with the following...

      DILD: I was moving through a grocery store, picking up some items and observing what else I might want to gather, until I reached a row of cash registers and knew I was in the last room. I had already picked up a bag of assorted stuffed animals from a whole bin of them. I recall making the same kind of obsessive comparisons I do in WL to decide which bag to pick. There were slight variations in all the stuffed animals so I was looking for the set I found the most appealing. I decided relatively quickly, the decisive factor being a stuffed bat I liked, and was carrying the bag with me.

      I turned around and walked back through the store to pick up some remaining things I hadn't fully decided on the first time through. I was considering getting some food, and glanced at what was on offer in the seafood section. I think I ended up going back out the front door at this point and found myself at a bus stop. The bus came and I didn't think I wanted to leave yet because I wasn't finished in the store. I was planning take the next bus if it were going to come in an hour, but I know sometimes the schedule is slower on Sundays. I asked the ticket seller when the next bus would be, and she said, "1:40." This startled me because it was already around 3:30pm in the afternoon. The next bus couldn't come earlier than this one... did she mean the next one wouldn't be here until the middle of the night? I asked about this and she nodded. I decided I'd better scrap my plans and leave on this bus, because I didn't have enough I wanted to do here to occupy a whole evening. I yelled at the driver not to leave yet and quickly slipped the ticket-seller a twenty dollar bill, which I figured should be enough, though I didn't know the exact price. I grabbed the change without counting it and jumped on the bus. But then I remembered I would also need a ticket for the guy I was with... there had actually been no guy with me earlier in the store scene but now the scene shifted.

      I was sitting next to a really hot guy and trying out a computer game he was showing me. This is how my mind accounted for the scene shift: I had been playing a game. Now I was distracted by our conversation. The guy was trying to figure out if he should go to—I think he was calling it "Burning Man," but I knew he meant a big festive parade through the city. After talking to him a few minutes I realized that I hadn't been paying attention to the game. I looked back at the screen and didn't recognize where my character was. Fortunately it was easy to restart from a save. But then my conversation with the guy took an even more distracting turn when I noticed how hot he was, felt an attraction that was apparently mutual, and started kissing him. After a few minutes of that I remembered the game I was playing and worried my character would have gotten killed, but I looked back at the screen and everything was fine... my character was actually going around doing things on his own.

      "This game plays itself!" I commented in surprise. But I didn't want to miss any part of the story, so I restarted again, only this time I was disappointed to see that the game had apparently been creating its own saves too, and now even the save point was well past the spot where I had gotten distracted. I wondered if I should just stop playing for now and start over from the beginning later.

      The scene shift at this point is vague, but the next thing I knew I was bodily in the game, back at the grocery store—though it looked different than the first one—this time with two companions, a guy and a girl. We were engaged in combat with the store employees, and everyone was throwing bottles. I didn't like this, so I called a halt to the bottle-throwing and my friends and I went outside. I was trying to explain to them what my objections were. "Too much broken glass," I complained. Even out here, the ground was littered with it, and on looking at it I felt a tiny sharp pang in the sole of my left foot. It seemed like I might really be feeling this with my physical body, so I continued my explanation: "The problem is, when there's too much broken glass, then you can feel it in the real world. Some kind of psycho-physical complex." The pang in my foot, which I could still feel, seemed like a great example: here I was in virtual reality, but stepping on broken glass made my real foot twinge. (Interestingly, I think a sensation in my physical foot was actually bleeding into, because I thought I could still feel it faintly when I woke up.)

      Up to this point I was not lucid, rather I was convinced that I was bodily immersed in a computer game (I think my brain often explains dreaming this way to itself), but as the pang in my foot made me contemplate the connection between my VR body and my physical body, I realized that I was actually dreaming. I was about to walk off with my friends, but it occurred to me, "If I'm lucid, I should do something useful." I remembered the wine TOTM. I'd just been in a store where we were smashing bottles of wine, what a waste! And we left on such bad terms, they might not like me going back in there... not to mention all that broken glass... but I guess I'd better hazard it. I turned around and half-opened the door, but then I realized there might be an easier way.

      I turned back to my friends. "Does anyone have any wine?" The girl immediately pulled a bottle from her backpack and gave it to me. Then I realized there might be another hitch. "Do you have an opener?" I asked her dubiously. She actually did! She pulled out a corkscrew and was waving it in the air at me, but I had already realized that I might be making things more complicated than necessary. I glanced at the bottle of wine and saw that although it was still sealed, the top covered in light blue foil, under the foil the cork seemed to be protruding three-quarters of the way out of the bottle. I tried to pull it out manually and was able to do so easily. There was still a small piece of cork in the neck of the bottle, but this shouldn't be a problem. My other friend was holding a butter knife, so I grabbed it from his hand without ceremony and used the handle (as the blade was smeared with butter) to push the cork inside. Lest it bob up and block the flow of the wine, I kept the knife handle in the neck to hold the cork to one side as I lifted the bottle toward my mouth to drink.

      "You guys don't mind if I drink the whole bottle, do you? I'm supposed to for my task." Without waiting for a reply, I tilted my head back and chugged. I was finished in seconds. Fortunately, even though the bottle had been full, it didn't feel like I drank any more than a glassful. My immediate reaction was surprise—that it tasted so convincingly like real wine. "It's actually a decent chardonnay," I commented to the girl who had given me the bottle. I focused my attention on the taste that lingered in my mouth: very buttery, rich, even ambrosial, with a hint of something sour around the edges but not strong enough to be off-putting. As I thought about what words I should use to describe it, I felt myself waking up.
    15. Diablo, rock concert

      by , 01-20-2015 at 06:23 PM (Snehk's Dreamlands)
      First dream

      I was playing Diablo 2 : Lord of destruciton on my laptop. I was a paladin, running through the forest in the first act.

      Second dream

      I was standing in the middle of the stage. I was holding an electric guitar in my hands. When I was ready to play, I felt strong, stinging sensation in the right side of my lower body. My mother arrived, and she told me Why are you dating with sister of your brothers girlfriend? I looked at a DC standing close to the stage. A skinny blonde with pearl white teeth and brown eyes. She had pale carnation, and she was wearing casual clothes. A black shirt and jeans trousers. She was smiling to me. I saw her first time, yet my DC mother claimed that she was her. I replied to my mother Don't disturb me! I have a concert to play, and there is a weird stinging sensation in the right side of my lower body!

      *I woke up with the same weird pain, but luckily it ceased until now.*
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