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    1. 06 Aug: Claustrophobia, lucid in a Spanish town and killing a dragon

      by , 08-06-2019 at 07:04 PM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening

      Attending Rinpoche's teachings but I am extremely sleepy. At some point I even get up and take a break. When I come back Rinpoche is gone.
      The teachings are followed by nightly entertainment. Some girl comes to me with silly talk and I yell at her that all that is total bullshit, but I am not angry, more like amused with whatever she said. We see a pretty light display in the sky. Laser projections of a spaceship flying among planets and other cute things. The display is attracting people uphill through a dirt road. it is very dark, no electric lights. Then the path ends at some kind of three walled dead end with soviet movies being projected on the wall. It's cool, until a huge number of people keep coming uphill and pushing the ones already at the dead end. People start to panic, feeling claustrophobic, pushing each other. I feel panic too but I believe there is some door somewhere and after a while I find a door at the corner to my left. We open it and people start exiting with relief. Outside is actually an inside of a venue and there are people looking at the panel with info by the door, about the exhibition we just came from. They want to come in, but we tell them not to, that people are actually needing to get out from there.

      Morning and people are departing on different buses. I am on a bus already leaving and see some familiar faces outside, sitting on the sidewalk waiting for a different bus. I see monks leaving the venue in another direction.
      Then I get lucid and get rid of the backpack I have on my lap. Accidentally, I hit a lady on her head with it, but I realize that if I don't care because she is a dream character, she will not react. And surely she doesn't. I get up from my sit and simply get through the glass window, but don't fly away. Instead I hang in the there, in the window frame, feeling the wind and enjoying the landscape. The bus is crossing a very high bridge and it's very vertiginous, but I like it. I make the bus go steeply up and down like a roller-coaster just for fun. The other passengers don't seem very please, but I keep reminding that they aren't real. Then the bus passes by a Bullfighting museum and I get the impression we are in Spain. I get out of the bus and get in the museum and start trashing it all using only telekinesis and chi blasts. It's very satisfying. Especially seeing the visitors of such dreadful place being blasted away. As I go deeper into this place, I pass some kind of patio with really beautiful stone floor, but the stones are very uneven and I am barefoot. I make some shoes appear on my feet and go deeper. Pass to a weirder area of this building, sort of descending to its catacombs and it gets sinister.[/COLOR] Most rooms I avoid, as they look familiar and I sense very creepy energy in them. Then I see a long staircase descending deep into the earth. The stairs and the walls look very organic. I sense danger too, but do not feel so much fear. I am attacķed by a dragon coming from the depths. I find some knight armors and other stuff lying around and I think I kill the dragon. Some weird creature, like an elf appears and says because I killed the dragon I am the heir of some saint or knight that fought dragons.
      Then I find an exit to outside and I am at a train station, clearly at some Mediterranean town. Very pitoresque, very peaceful, very soothing. The weather is extremely nice but very cloudy. The clouds are luminous and the air is very light. I feel like singing and dancing and without any agenda, I just make love with the air and everything around me. I think of the guru and feel that he is all around me.
    2. Awesome Concert

      by , 07-12-2019 at 11:43 PM
      I woke up early in the morning and went back to bed attempting to MILD again. Instead of a lucid dream, I was put into several smaller dreams, most with a very vivid piece to them.

      I'm on a road trip to a brew fest on a bus with many people. The bus gets parked and we have most of the day to do whatever. I feel bad because the same people who brought the bus to carry everyone in were also the ones who brought some kind of house for everyone to stay in. I tell myself that I will buy some groceries so I'm contributing something. Someone mentions that they just saw one of the coolest concerts ever and I'm suddenly in a sky camera view in a stadium with the concert. It's a group consisting of 3 DJ's or mixers similar to Swedish House Mafia or Glitch Mob as well as an entire orchestra. The two groups mix perfectly together with an occasional solo from a single violin or cello that is accented by the beat still being given by the DJ's. I'm surprised that the instrumentalists can keep up with the beat of the song. Then they start to play covers of Star Wars music which is also cool.

      In another dream, it feels like I have a movie view for some of it and first person view in others. I'm watching Anna Kendrick and a few of her friends walk into a prom reception which is a super fancy locale surrounded entirely by a pool. They have to walk through the pool, about knee deep , to get into the reception. Once inside., the lighting is super cool because everything appears in gray scale except for the decorations hanging from the ceiling and the centerpieces on all the tables which are vibrant colors.
      Tags: bus, color, concert, music
      Categories
      non-lucid
    3. 31 May: Sick at a GoT set and school reunion

      by , 05-31-2019 at 01:59 PM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening

      Visiting the GoT set with the cast, been snacking with Daenerys (I don't even watch GoT!).
      Night is falling and people are going to sleep, right on the set, like a big camp. One actor challenges me for a jazz dance on the floor. I also try bonding with a cat who cuts my face real bad with his claws. As I clean the wounds I start swelling. I panic, but there is an MD and he examines me. He removes something from my neck that is kind of a yellow jello foam.
      I enter into shock and he lays me down, turns me over, injects something in my buttocks, then inserts a probe up my ass until I feel it reaching my throat and I start vomiting more of that yellow foam like there's no tomorrow. I feel relieved. He says that's what had been hurting me for some time.

      At a campus in London I re encounter school friends. We attend and art presentation, I spot Mara with a friend. I talk to someone from my university who is telling me stories about all the troubles he is getting with job interviews. Then I take a bus, it only costs 12 cents, find it cheap.
    4. 15 Mar: Bus falling on a river and tiny people

      by , 03-15-2019 at 11:41 AM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening

      With my grandpa on a bus that is on a road parallel to the Tagus river in Santarém. The river is so dry, he feels disturbed. I notice the lack of sand under the pillars of the bridge that crosses the river and soon enough part of the bridge collapses, when we were just at the beginning of it. When we fall, the bus lands partially on a platform at the river bed, but dangerously dangling. I call people to our side of the bus to make it tilt and it stays balanced. Then we realize somehow we and the bus have been shrunk and we are now tiny people in a big world. We don't know what to do but we find other tiny people like us. At first they don't want to help us, but I manage to at least converse with them. They seem fine with being tiny.

      (A secret dream about my guru)
    5. Arrival

      by , 01-24-2019 at 07:19 AM
      Morning of January 22, 2019. Tuesday.

      Dream #: 19,027-05. Reading time (optimized): 1 min.



      This entry describes a vivid dream from an early evening nap, which typically renders rapidly processed vestibular system correlation, most often something or someone falling or coming down from above as in this case, though still inherited in some cases and not always with a so-called sleep start.



      In my dream, I remain aware of being in the dream state, but I do not attempt to mediate any of the processes. It seems to be in the afternoon. I watch a black double-decker bus slowly come down from the sky and land in the middle of the street in an unknown location. (It comes straight down from above. There is no forward movement.) I do not see any wheels, but otherwise, it has no unusual features. However, it is implied to be an alien spacecraft despite the “aliens” appearing as human teenagers that fill the bus. (There are no thoughts about a driver or any defined backstory.)

      An unknown girl comes from the back, from the top section, and emerges through the main entrance on the side facing me. A crowd of people slowly approach her. The bus is facing to my right, implying left-hand drive, so it is erroneous if intending a UK or Australian setting.



      Waking autosymbolism is usually oriented to the right when sleeping on my left side. Bus dreams are usually linear vestibular system correlation and inherited, not transitional and projected as here, though again, this is a nap dream. I am assuming the emergence simulacrum represents Zsuzsanna.


      Updated 01-25-2019 at 06:55 AM by 1390

      Categories
      lucid
    6. The Ticker

      by , 09-20-2018 at 09:44 AM
      Morning of September 20, 2018. Thursday.

      Reading time (optimized): 4 min. Readability score: 63.



      Following vestibular system correlation (type one passive) as dream state induction, this stage of REM sleep is typically with less-directed thought processes, so I maintain my dream self as a passenger rather than a driver in this part of the sleep cycle.

      I place my dream self on a bus (though I have not been on a bus in real life for years). I sit on the left-hand side (subliminal dreaming orientation), about four seats back from the unfamiliar approximately forty-year-old male bus driver. There is not much lighting even though it seems to be morning. I partly rely on my sense of touch.

      The bus is going south, past the intersection of Loomis and Gillette Streets. (An intersection represents RAS mediation in real time.) My mother is in the seat in front of me, appearing as she was in the 1980s. I have no recall of her death in 2002, though I have no recall of my current conscious self identity either. My dream self seems to be about seventeen years old. (My waking-life age is fifty-seven.)

      There are clusters of used tissues, some strewn on the seat to my right, though they may not be mine. My mother had given me a small pocket watch which I also loosely associate with a timer. (The watch thread comes from one of the first scenes from “Anon” from 2018, seen before sleep. However, it is also a concurrent ultradian rhythm factor and a subliminal assertion of the dreaming and waking process. The tissue rendering is the subliminal memory of our youngest daughter throwing her used tissues on the couch as Zsuzsanna and I were watching “Anon.” Carefully and intelligently note the erroneous dream state correlation of couch with bus seat. That has been a common distortion factor in vestibular correlation processes since early childhood.)

      I see the analog watch face clearly, noticing that it is five seventeen. I hold it up to my right ear (subliminal waking environment orientation) and listen to it tick. However, after a time, I cannot hear it ticking, though, at times, there are a couple of discernible ticks before silence again. That annoys me. My mother is surprised, as she had just gotten it for me. I accidentally drop it onto the bus seat. I consider that it had become mixed up with the tissues. However, I retrieve it just before it moves down into the recess between the back of the seat and the seat itself. I vividly feel (without seeing it) with enhanced tangibility, that it is oval, though when I look at it, it is circular. I wind it without looking at it, feeling the winding crown tighten. It ticks a few more times but stops again. I start to wonder what the real time is, as it has only moved a bit towards five eighteen in all this time. (The imagery of the watch face remains consistent, which is an atypical dream state detail, especially when reading text or numbers as here.)

      Instead of continuing south, we are now going north back towards the Loomis and Gillette Street intersection. My dream self does not question this nonsensical reversal. The area does not look as it does in real life. I get off the bus on my own. Eventually, I am in the Barolin Street house (which is in Australia, not America, though I have not lived there in years). I go into the kitchen of the Barolin Street house. (However, there is a vague essence of the Cubitis house as correlating with the living room.) Despite being in a variation of the Barolin Street house, my conscious self identity does not yet emerge.

      I am going to get a new watch just like the previous one. I take it out of a disposable rectangular corrugated foil baking pan (inferred to be from the freezer of the refrigerator even though I do not discern any coldness from the feature) in which an uncooked chicken (for roasting) sits inside. The pan sits on a table. I soon realize that I could have taken the watch out without absentmindedly unwrapping the chicken. I pull the plastic wrap back over the chicken and close it up with Scotch tape. Around this time, I start to wake.



      The watch identifies the emerging consciousness factor, which in my dream, remains just beyond one-quarter consistency, though my dream self anticipates five-thirty. I am fifty-seven in reality (five seven). However, my dream self’s age is seventeen (my age when moving to Wisconsin).

      The uncooked chicken (potential flight as the dream state exit process rendered as not a viable emerging consciousness event) is the final vestibular system correlation in a very passive projected form with the additional factor of subliminal awareness that I am undressed as I sleep. Putting the plastic back around it is analogous to keeping my bed sheet over my body as I sleep. (This was not the last dream of my sleep cycle.) When I was half-awake, I realized the bed sheet had slipped down over the side of my body.

      The bus driver is this dream’s preconscious avatar (not dominant or confrontational as this is not my last dream of the sleep cycle) as well as vestibular system personification (linear). My mother, in this situation, is probably a subliminal awareness of Zsuzsanna (despite the total absence of my current conscious self identity in this dream), as she is the mother of our children (thus I hear variations of “mother” quite often from day to day). It also correlates with the scene from “Anon” where the female voice-over sounded as if it began with “Zsuzsanna” when the holographic watch appeared on Sal’s wrist from the storefront display. However, after “I am an open window…over infinity,” it is “Giguere,” not “Zsuzsanna.” (I did not know this before sleeping.) Additionally, if the movie scene did not occur from the far left side of the television screen, it likely would not have influenced my dream in the way it did.


    7. “Baby Driver”

      by , 09-15-2018 at 05:35 AM
      Night of September 13, 2018. Tuesday.

      Reading time: 1 min. Readability score: 62.



      Vestibular system correlation begins as my dream begins, which is semi-lucid but allowed to render randomly, as I do not make a willful attempt to orient or give willful detail to any of the patchy space. However, a common thought at this stage is choosing the setting of being on a bus, which is not as expansive a process as a helicopter or airplane (or flying unaided).

      So the setting stabilizes as a bus, seemingly in late afternoon, but I am not corporeal, as I have not fully “stepped in,” though I am on the right of the bus driver’s seat. There is no driver. An empty child safety seat (baby car seat) is atop the empty bus driver’s seat, closer to the steering wheel. The bus is moving in a setting that seems like an ambiguous mix of a bullring (bullfighting arena) and a Nascar venue. Although it is driving itself, my dream self is still liminally controlling its direction and speed.

      The Paul Simon song, “Baby Driver,” is loudly playing from an undetermined source, diffusing through the environment. There is an enhanced awareness of energy and activity. I start to feel very amused and cheerful by the absurdity of the scenario. Most members of the audience are cheering and throwing confetti as the bus circles the area.

      I start to wonder why the Paul Simon song emerged, as I had not heard or thought of it in years. Still feeling cheerful, I decide to come out of my dream.


      Categories
      lucid
    8. Day 105: Time Skips Are Fun

      by , 05-26-2018 at 04:12 PM (An Insomniac's Dream Journal)
      Whoa, did not expect to be gone for 26 days (Around that anyway, I don't care). And I missed my 100th day anniversary, so that's a shame. But enough of that, let's get started.


      Dream 87: Bus

      Just a fragment. I remember sitting on the window seat of a bus while looking out through the window. It was sunset, and there were two girls in the parking lot, a couple. I stared at them for a couple seconds until the taller one with the shorter hair looked at me and I looked away.


      Dream 88: Educational Hijinks

      Except there are no hijinks to be found. I was just getting from one class to the other--not very interesting. This was also a pretty dull fragment.
    9. Alfred Hitchcock’s Bus Mishap

      by , 05-24-2018 at 02:01 PM
      Morning of May 24, 2018. Thursday.



      My dream self becomes aware of being on a bus in late afternoon.

      I look around and see a number of unfamiliar people. They seem to be waiting for something. There is an ambiguous sense of being outdoors on a public street and inside a large building at the same time. The bus is not moving at first. I am sitting in about the middle of the row on the right-hand side.

      Alfred Hitchcock makes an appearance (walking from left to right) as if he is presently involved in directing a movie. He has an illogical black-and-white essence unlike the rest of the setting, which is in color (though my dream self does not regard this as impossible or unusual). I consider that I might have somehow gotten on the wrong bus, and that I am on a movie set. If this is the case, I know I will not be going where I had intended even though there is no backstory with any awareness of my implied destination (though I do not even focus on any implied destination at any time, which is the usual case with dreams of this nature).

      The bus eventually starts moving inexplicably, that is, no driver is in view, though there does not even seem to be a place for a driver, just the front open area of the bus and a clear view through the front windows. Alfred turns around and briefly looks surprised. The bus may have run over him, as he remains unseen. I remain in my seat, but there is no drama after this. It is quietness.



      This dream is easy to resolve. Firstly, the bus, because it is a vehicle, is an autosymbolic extension of my liminal awareness of my physical body in sleep. Alfred Hitchcock is a typical rendering of RAS mediation, which allows me liminal control of the dream state over his “direction” in this case, even more so as he is associated with having made mystery and suspense movies (associated with the enigma of being between dreaming and waking).


    10. The Gifts You've Been Given

      by , 04-13-2018 at 12:55 AM (The Fourth Factor)
      I’m an observer watching a scene unfold on a boat—but really, it’s more that I’m looking at it and the people on deck while being aware of the situation playing out there in a more abstract way. There are some documents I need for traveling on this boat, and I’m not sure if I have them or if I need to go through some process to get them.

      The scene shifts—I’m now exiting a bus. But instead of winding up outside as I had expected, I’ve simply stepped onto another bus. I quickly take a seat behind the two women who entered ahead of me and wonder where this one is going to take me.

      The scene shifts again—this time, I’m waking up in the back of a car my parents are driving. It feels as if I’m younger in this one. We’ve just stopped by a building I recognize as the one where my father’s workshop is. That means we’re not far from home now. I fall back asleep.

      The scene shifts yet again—this time, I’m in a grocery store. And this time, I know it’s a dream, although I still seem to think the last bit with the car was waking reality. I think it would be best if I sleep for the remainder of the trip, and so that means making sure this dream lasts.

      I look around. There don’t seem to be anyone here but me. It's reminiscent of the specialty grocer’s down the street from my old flat on Svornosti. That means there should be a counter over in the corner where I can get some coffee.

      I go over and find the counter is there, and that there’s somebody behind it. There’s nothing displaying prices, so I just put down three bills, possibly dollars, which seems like a more than fair price. But the woman tells me I have to make the coffee myself using the machine there. It’s an odd contraption, like no coffee maker I’ve ever used, but after messing around for it a bit, I get it to pour some coffee out - Turkish style, with the grounds at the bottom. I drink it. This isn’t a conscious attempt at stabilization, I don’t think—just something that struck me as a pretty good idea—but it may have had that effect, as it’s normally hard for me to stay asleep so late in the morning.

      I consider where to go from here. Perhaps home, where the car was headed—only I have no idea where I am right now. But if I fly, perhaps I’ll see some familiar landmark from the air and be able to find my way from there. And to fly, I’ll need a high place to launch from—so it looks like I’m headed to the roof.

      In the meantime, I’ve noticed six or seven wolves between two shelves on the upper story, which is a sort of balcony over one half of the store. They all trot off in a single direction as I watch. Are they coming after me? But I wasn’t planning on sticking around here in any case. I climb a shelf and phase through the ceiling.

      I now find myself in a room lit by a warm light. A long mahogany table laid with bright red dishes is some distance off—set for an elaborate meal, it looks like. It's quite pretty. I continue on my way, climbing another shelf and jumping through the ceiling.

      This time I’m in an attic-like room near a big calico cat that, in typical feline fashion, seems entirely unimpressed by my unusual method of transportation. But it’s about then that I wake up.

      I also wake up remembering something else—not something I heard, but words that seemed to be impressed on my mind. It went something like: “Use the gifts you’ve been given, human.” I don’t know who said it—perhaps it was the cat?—but it seemed somehow independent from the rest of the dream, like it was taking place on a different level. Good advice, in any case.

      12.4.18 - (Happy Lucid Dreaming Day, everyone!)
    11. Complete story dream about asteroid and dream about weird bus trip.

      by , 03-16-2018 at 02:08 PM
      I remember the dream starting where I am exploring a new version of the "Nuketown" map from Call of Duty, only this time the houses on the map are even larger, and as I'm exploring them I find one part that leads to what seems to be a seemingly massive Bathroom. I leave and run into a map deaigner who explains that during a game, this part would be sealed off since it's too large and would take too long to find players hiding in it.

      I then leave and go outside and see people getting on a bus, taking an unknown trip and I get in line and get on. No one seems to know where we are going and the guy next to me is acting weird, disturinging other passengers and has to be moved. The girl sitting in front of me tells me that she's only 15, when suddenly a woman in the front of the bus reveals that everyone on this bus is actually 27 (I'm 25.) and guilty of horrible crimes, and then the bus drives into some nearby water.

      I'm then telling this story to myself while looking out the bedroom window of my house as I see all these people outside just hanging out and I ride my bike to a nearby theater to see a movie. During the previews for the movie, there is an ad showing an asteroid labeled "0W-05" and a joke about it come to ruin everything. I look it up on my phone and it was in the news that a massive asteroid is headed right towards Earth and there will likely be no survivors. I talk to the guy sitting in front of me about it, who is someone I know in real life, but I forget the conversation.

      We then watch the movie and it's Avengers Infinity War and I think about how we could use the Infinity Gauntlet to stop the asteroid if it was real.
      We then leave the theater and I'm waiting in line for various fast food places, then go to a somewhat full Panda Express that doesn't really have a line despite only one person working behind the counter. I think about how everyone is now just eating whatever they want.

      I then am at a psychiatrists office, and he says that he's going to have the session end at a random time and we are then watching a short cartoon about a kid like Jimmy Neutron trying to rescue another kid who is stuck on top of a movie bus. I remember the cartoon being awkward to watch, but then an ad for the next episode showed that it would be a lot more mature and be about the kid's relationship with his younger brother.

      I then talk to the psychiatrist about what it's like knowing the world is going to end and he asks me what I want to do on my last days, and I think about all the things I want to get done. I'm then reading through a bunch of Justice League comics that I wanted to read, but then put the comic down and start actually making a list of other things I want to do.

      I'm then at a church talking to people about how weird the asteroid ending the world is since apparently it means the world isn't ending the way the book of Revelations said it would, and even if right before the asteroid hit us it occurred, it wouldn't make sense because we aren't supposed to know when it's going to happen. One of the guys mentions that it's possible that some people might survive, then dismisses this possibility. He then asks me if I'm familiar with something in the Catholic Church called the "Devil and the Lamb on your shoulder." I tell him no and he's confused that I never heard about this common thing.

      I forget how exactly the dream ends, but I remember I'm with my father and aware it's all a dream, but am thinking about what I would do if the world really was going to end.

      Psychiatrist, Panda Express, revelations, comics

      Updated 03-16-2018 at 02:15 PM by 63752

      Categories
      Uncategorized
    12. The Gift of Rain and the Inexplicable Nature of RAS

      by , 02-16-2018 at 09:29 AM
      Morning of February 16, 2018. Friday.



      In my dream, the most vivid scenario of the waking transition involves my dream self (personified subconscious) being on a bus with my wife Zsuzsanna and our youngest children. I remain in a passive and thankful mood. The location is unknown. It does not seem familiar, though the bus driver is on the left side, so it seems to be implied to be in America (though I have not lived there since 1994 and Zsuzsanna has never been there).

      The bus driver is an unknown chubby female of whom reminds me of my crossing guard from when I lived at 901 Rose Street (near the intersection in a second floor apartment of a building which is no longer there).

      It seems to be late morning, though the perceived time seems to change a few times (of which is very common in my dreams, as my subconscious self has no viable sense of time or continuity). There is an intersection up ahead. I am aware that it had been raining. An interesting mood develops. I realize that rain makes human life possible and that without it, the world would have no life. I have a vague awareness that the bus driver had telepathically caused me to realize this.

      There had been a flood in one part of the street (from the rain), but the water has lowered. As we near the intersection, I have the typical focus on whether or not the bus driver is competent (this being a long-term carryover from waking life thought since childhood, though this thought does not dominate or seem problematic and I ultimately trust the driver to get us home safely).

      The bus stops, but we are apparently not at our destination yet (though my dream self has no focus on where I presently live as is often the case). The bus is on the right side of the street, its back close to the perpendicular street it just turned from. The bus driver says, “I have to find something”. I am standing in the front stairwell of the bus watching her. She puts her hands down into the murky water near the curb. Soon, she pulls out a small tennis racket that is slightly muddy (though with very light-colored tan sand). I am uncertain if this is what she had been looking for, but she gives it to my youngest son. My dream fades from here.



      Zsuzsanna, in real life, had been looking at, and thinking about, small tennis rackets made for dolls while at a Kmart store on the previous day (Our Generation dolls and accessories). There is no explicable way I could have known this or for it to influence the main event in my final dream of the sleeping period. Not only this, she said her thought processes were “stronger” than usual during this event. Additionally, after my dream, she told me of how she had won a tennis racket at age twelve by reaching into water and pulling out a toy duck (relating to a matching number for the prize at a Brisbane show). This is not unusual in my experience, as at least one dream per sleeping period is based on something Zsuzsanna had thought about (or said to someone else) of which I could not have possibly known about. This was validated to have been going on, continuously, long before we met, and additionally, Zsuzsanna is the “mystery girl” who had been in my dreams since childhood (and of whom I even saw in my dreams as an adult while she was still very young).



      The scenario of this dream, a bus approaching an intersection and stopping or bumping into a curb before turning right (sometimes in the event of water lowering waking symbolism as here), has recurred since early childhood, though always with different dynamics. This is based on neural gating. It signifies whether or not the dream state will terminate or continue. (However, there are also inexplicable dynamics of which I will describe below.) As here, the bus turns right and my dream soon ends after the RAS to emergent consciousness factor, additionally validated by the water lowering waking symbolism, which occurs in at least one dream during every sleeping period (water symbolizing sleep in autosymbolism, its dynamics relevant to the specific aspect of REM).

      RAS as the personified preconscious is a bus driver here. The biological function of RAS (Reticular Activating System) is for sleep-wake transitions (though again, there are inexplicable dynamics). This is why a dream is primarily autosymbolic of the dream state and waking transition itself, which is why “interpretation” as most commonly propagated is not a real concept despite the Barnum effect.

      There is evidence that the side the bus driver is on in a dream correlates with what side I am sleeping on, especially as buses and cars often symbolize (or are an autosymbolic extension of) the human body. (This is also true for boats, airplanes, and trains when vestibular system ambiguity is more extant in REM. In fact, there has even been a dream where a bus I was on rolled over after I rolled over to sleep on my opposite side. However, the content of a dream must be looked at closely, as autosymbolism is based on the specific level of unconsciousness and varies from state to state through the waking transition.)



      I know that RAS mediation and modulation as a dream’s final event, when it utilizes personification as the preconscious as here, is often transpersonal (inherently unrelated to both the dream self and the conscious self by its very nature and purpose, as its purpose is to ignite enough emotion to trigger waking, including by way of dominance or perceived conflict, real or not, though some of this “conflict” is caused by muscle tension in unconsciousness as well as vestibular system ambiguity or subliminal concern over unknown environmental noise). This tells me that RAS is not simply the biological factor of the neural gating of the dream state in REM, but transpersonal neural gating that also occurs when I am conscious. However, the dynamics are puzzling. Sometimes these events have happened in real time (during my nap while Zsuzsanna was elsewhere and “sending” in real time) and sometimes based on recent thoughts that Zsuzsanna had held in her mind but which later integrates into my dream.


    13. Up & Down the Street; Whose Dogs?

      by , 02-08-2018 at 07:00 PM (The Fourth Factor)
      I can’t remember how the dream began, which means that I can’t be sure whether I had realized I was dreaming and decided to fly around for a while or whether I had somehow realized that I could fly and stabilize my surroundings but not the full implications of it. But either way, that’s what I ended up doing.

      It seems to be early evening, and I’m on a street where all the buildings are lit up with small, multicolored lights. The street is steep and winding—a little reminiscent of Nerudova Street in its topography and architecture—and it has a vibrant and exciting atmosphere, as if it’s a Saturday night and this is the place to go on a Saturday night.

      the adverse effects of B6-nerudova-ulice-prague-1909.jpg
      (Click to enlarge (because I can't figure out how to make it bigger here))

      I fly all the way up the street and then turn around and fly back down again. But it doesn’t feel quite as real as I know it could be. I focus harder, and I imagine hearing music as I fly along, and that seems to help—this time, it feels as if I’m actually there. I fly back again, and this time I try it while spinning around—something I’ve never done before. It turns out to be a lot of fun, seeing the ground change places with the sky.

      Sometime later—in another dream, probably—I'm on a bus on some kind of a trip. I’m with a large group—many young children, some teenagers and a couple adults. There are also some children and teens there who are exchange students from another country. I have the impression this is a trip for the kids, and the teens and I—not sure of my age in the dream—are there to help out with it.

      At some point, we make a stop at a large grocery store—the sort that’s often still open in the middle of the night, which it seems to be now. A group of us, including me, goes in. But a woman—maybe the person in charge—asks me if I could take the dog outside for a bit so she can have a chance to burn off some energy before we’re back on the bus. She has the dog there—a big, black dog, female, I think. I agree to it.

      Once in front of the store, the dog goes sprinting off in a big loop, eventually coming back around to me. She immediately runs off again, and this time she returns carrying a stick in her mouth. Looks like we’re going to be playing fetch. But just then, I hear barking coming off from to my left. Two smaller dogs are there—neither one on a leash, I note—and the one that looks like a half-size pit bull is barking up a storm. I am instantly on alert: I have seen scenarios like this one end with furniture being toppled. But the black dog is not acting threatened or aggressive, and so it seems unlikely that a fight’s going to break out. I have a vague impression of the dogs’ owner nearby—but just then, my alarm wakes me.

      8.2.18
      Attached Thumbnails Attached Thumbnails the adverse effects of B6-nerudova.jpg  
    14. 18-01-17 False Bus Awakening, Wolfenstein Punch-Out

      by , 01-18-2018 at 02:16 AM
      I was having a vivid dream, which I have forgotten now. When I woke up from this dream, I found myself on a bus. I was standing, and when I woke I mumbled something as I was still finishing a sentence in the dream I was having. A man gave me a weird look, and I felt embarrassed. I told him I could sleep while standing, as this is apparently what had happened. I looked out the window, and saw it was the street leading to my old high school (Prins Kavellei, heading north). I felt very confused. I didn't know how I got there. I didn't remember getting on that bus. I knew there weren't supposed to be any buses on that particular road. In fact, I had no idea what day it was, what time it was, or what I'd done earlier that day. Then, I woke up again. This time, I found myself back in 'reality'.

      I was having a "Wolfenstein: The New Colossus" themed dream. I was in a small town vaguely reminiscent of the Roswell level. I was supposed to go on a solo mission to do something important. I'd have to enter a manhole in the street. Someone wished me luck. An old colleague, Patrick Sevenans, approached me and reluctantly (he hated me) wished me luck. He handed me a handful of small change, for some reason. Just a euro or two in small coins. At some point, I saw an übersoldier attacking a civilian, or friend. I rushed in, trying to protect this person. But I was too late and (s)he was dead. I had no time to pull out my guns, so I just punched the armored übersoldier with my bare hands. This was 'realistic', not game mechanics. I had a kind of super-strength, apparently. I knocked off his helmet, revealing its horrific face. I hit his face a few times until it died. Before long, there was gunfire everywhere and the 'stealthy' mission became a massive shootout.

      When I woke up, I had Chris Isaak's "Wicked Game" in my head.
    15. Bus to Bunk Beds

      by , 12-20-2017 at 06:20 PM
      Morning of December 20, 2017. Wednesday.



      Bus to Bunk Beds

      I am aware of a double-decker bus in our neighborhood where we presently live. It seems to be afternoon. I see it pass three different times. After it stops for a time on the street and about two houses east of our house, I discover it is mainly now made of the bunk beds of our two youngest sons. I am annoyed because it may take some time and work in getting it back in our house.

      A singular vehicle, whether it is a bus, car, airplane, or boat, is typically a form of autosymbolism that stems from the illusory physicality of the dream state. In this case, it actually transitions to the dream state indicator of the bunk beds as further validation of how such autosymbolism forms in REM sleep, almost like a virtual reverse engineering of the dream sequence itself. This is quite common in my dreams and one of the factors that helped me understand dreams at a very early age.



      Lounge Room Enterprise

      I am lying on the lounge room floor in the morning when I realize our lounge room “is” the USS Enterprise (NCC-1701 from the original “Star Trek” series). At times, I consider if I am inconveniencing the crew by lying near the captain’s chair (to its right). No one says anything or asks me to move or get up. Additionally, there is not a viable sense of traveling through outer space in this case, though it is not implied to be the television series set either. Looking up at our television, which seems mostly normal, it shows stars and what looks like small curly hairs moving toward the viewer, our television apparently serving as the Enterprise viewscreen.

      This was similar to “Helicopter Not Landing Yet” (relative to its specific type of autosymbolism) from Christmas morning of 2016 and a number of other dreams since childhood. In such dreams, the vestibular system correlation associated with the illusory physicality of the dream state transmutes into a house or other building perceived as a vehicle, with various levels of ambiguity (including the essence of bilocation in some cases, which is common in my dreams). This includes dreams such as “Riding in a House Back to Arcadia”, where my Cubitis home travels down the highway as an oversized bus.



      “White Christmas” Not a Trigger

      I hear lyrics from “White Christmas” (sitting in the lounge room of our present home, possibly hearing it from a radio or television), but I do not catch this dream state indicator, that is, the phrase “I’m dreaming”. Such dream state indicators rarely trigger lucidity and if anything, keep me relaxed on the passive side of RAS mediation, even though they have occurred throughout every sleep cycle for over 50 years. That is moot though, since I seem to think it is near June rather than December and see it as unusual in that way, as being “unseasonable”.



      Along with “Theme Park Drive with Zsuzsanna” and “The Roof Factor”, 5 of 12 regular dreams for this date are presently online. (By “regular”, I mean other than the numerous hypnagogic dreams at the beginning of each sleep cycle, which are typically too many to count or feasibly record.)


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