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My friend's dad locked me in his basement in a tiny cell for weeks(or months?). In order to eat, I caught mice and somehow started fires to roast them over. When the dad asked me what I ate, and I told him. "I eat everything but the insides." My body was starved and withering away. I was scared and alone. I looked for ways to escape but it was impossible. Then, my friend and her mom came home and somehow I got access to a cell phone. At this point, I was sobbing. I tried calling the friend's mom to tell her what her husband was doing to me but the call didn't go through. My friend came by and I saw a chance to get a hold of a bottle of alcohol. I told her this, and she told me not too because her dad might find out and be mad. Then I found another phone and tried to call 911 but when I pressed "9" a "0" would pop up after it so it took me awhile. I was crying so hard saying, "help me, help me!" It was traumatizing.

It wasn't quite a nightmare, but a scary, disturbing dream.

Morning of January 18, 2015. Sunday.



Of the thousands of variations that have been rendered in my dreams of my Cubitis home since 1968, along comes a completely different one after over thirty years of last having been there. This one is a little more diverse than usual. I do not believe this is due to long-term memory distortion either, because there were alterations of the house in my dreams when I was living there (and indeed, as there have been with all places I have lived). This is also another “extra window” dream as with a recent dream about my present home. My dream is very vivid (fully in-body), though I am not lucid at any point.

My dream seemingly takes place late at night. My wife Zsuzsanna is with me (though she has never been to America). My computer setup in real life is somewhat similar to how it is set up in my bedroom in my dream, with the monitor facing the windows directly behind me (in my dream, north). At one point, I turn around to look out the jalousie windows. There seems to be at least one additional (fictional) large window, immediately to the left of the door to the carport.

This variation is unusual in that it seems to be the first time the house has been directly rendered in the middle of a seemingly large city (though there were many early precognitive dreams concerning the new highway and such at the back of our property). There is even a well-maintained city street (and sidewalks) close to the house where the northern side yard (and the orange grove beyond) would otherwise be, running east and west. Also, the playground from my elementary school has replaced our large front yard though as if being another city block west of us. There is a shorter chain-link fence along that part of the sidewalk, the sidewalk of which replaces our long real-life driveway (the playground area being open in reality and which otherwise faced the rest of the school grounds). I do not know what would be in our backyard and easterly as we remain in our bedroom throughout my dream.

Two (unknown) teenage girls are walking from the west along the chain-link fence on our side of the street. Eventually, it is a group of four girls. There is also an older male and his wife or girlfriend walking from the same direction at one point, about ten feet ahead of the girls.

I decide to close all the windows for privacy in case my wife and I become more intimate. I close two windows (including the fictional one) without incident. However, when I go to close the outside door’s jalousie window, the handle wobbles (as a different one did in real life until I finally fixed it) and a glass pane falls out from near a lower row and smashes in our carport. This is an odd incident though, as there is an additional somewhat confusing and uncertain aspect to it by which I also somehow “feel” the weight and momentum of the event as it happens (an odd but vivid perception not possible in reality but which has occurred in dreams). At the same time I was closing our window, the older male, as he was walking easterly by with his partner (to the left of her), apparently threw a large (unknown) object into our carport (possibly something of ours that was in the carport - I get the vague impression of a golf club but we never had any in reality) so that it hit the window as I was closing it, which possibly is what caused the pane to come out. There is the idea that the male was also startled by the window breaking even though he was seemingly (possibly absentmindedly) vandalizing the place (even though he is about sixty and seems dressed neatly). I call out “hey” and the couple continues to walk out of view, but walking a little faster now.

I mention to my wife about how “they” broke our window, but by this point, the group of four girls (mostly all in blue jeans and singlets) is there just north of the carport (on the fictional sidewalk) who think I am accusing them. They all stop and look into the carport and through the jalousie window of the door. I notice that the area seems fairly built-up and see what may be stores and taller commercial buildings across the (fictional) street in the semidarkness. One of the girls talks about how it was not her or any of her friends who broke the window and she talks about the male who is no longer in the immediate area. I am aware of who did it, of course, but I do not coherently confirm this to them. They do not seem angry or even annoyed at any point, though. They continue to hang around and I guess they are worried about getting into trouble for something they did not do. However, I am still contemplating on whether the window coincidentally broke when something was thrown near the door and perhaps was not directly broken by the older male. As I wake, I am trying to gather my thoughts in a manner that I can tell them to go on their way and not worry about our broken window, without insulting them or giving them cause for them to believe I think they were vandalizing the house but for some reason, I cannot logically come up with how to communicate this at all as my dream fades.

~01/13/15 This next DEILD (9 minutes) was amazing. I came back into the dream on the same little city street. I took off flying and and the visuals and sensations were about as impressive as I ever remember. I really got the effect of great height and distance. It was very 3D and techno color. I saw way down below me a heard of wild white stallions running across the plains between a couple hills. I swooped down in a swan dive with wisps of mist blowing past me. I flew along above the heard as they ran then splashed through a stream.
I saw another area ahead the looked inhabited so I flew over there. It was some sort of market and many people were around. I saw a pretty woman sitting on a table and went up to her. I started to kiss her and she did not protest.

Suddenly my pretty female D.G. is behind me, "Eric, What exactly do you think you are doing?"

"Um, Kissing this woman?"

DG: "And?"

I look down and realize I have been playing with her breasts. "Um I guess I am feeling up this beautiful woman?"

DG: "Aren't you just going to destabilize you dream and than have to spend time recovering it?. Wouldn't it be better if you stayed focused and didn't piss off the locals. You see the interesting thing about being a foreigner is,,,,,mnhg anskk ummm,,, "

Basically at this point in the lecture I looked back down at the woman and as I played with her breast they changed into puppet breasts. I mean fake breasts made out of stuffed burlap or something (I assume D.G. changed the image when I stopped listening to her."

OK, fine, I will try to do something productive. I took up straight into the air all Superman style a bit irritated. I decided to become a meteor. I shot up over a mile high and changed into a meteor. I had assumed it would be fun, but did not account for how fast meteors hit. In a flash I crushed into the ground and reformed laying flat on shattered roadway.

The snooze went off and I really wanted to do it all again, but I did have to wake up.

~01/13/15 I hit the snooze again (9 minutes) and pictured the last scene. I started moving my legs using tactile visualization. I almost thought I was moving my real legs, but realized that was not the case as I could not be moving them very much while in bed. Suddenly I was landing in front of the temple I had seen from the sky scraper. I walked through a large red gate in the Shinto style. It was a large open area and I walked around to the right side of a half wall. I reached up and touched one of the pillars. A piece of the pillar came off in my hand and it appeared to be ancient wood eaten by ants or something.

I hear the voice of my D.G. "I really do not think you should be walking around in here."

Ok, well she has never led me wrong, and it is so damn easy for me to get in trouble on the astral, so I turn around and walk back out through the gate. I look around out front and notice a sand drift nearby. I am amazed in that it appears to be layers of brightly colored sand like you see in fancy bottles. I scooped some up in my hands and examined it. It really was impressive how bright and vivid the layers of sand were.

I took off flying from the temple towards another area off to the right and up on a new plane of gravity (weird). It seemed as if each area was on a slight different dimension and space sort of bent like a tunnel connecting them. This area was like a small city with lots of people and a road. I saw a vehicle that I pictured sort of like an old car. There seemed to be some sort of small event going on, perhaps a farmers market kind of affair. At this point the alarm went off. I hit snooze and DEILD again.

I kept on doing that Nose Reality Check, I could breathe even though I'm plugging it. (Maybe it's possible I had to sneeze so I was doing the RC because I don't like sneezing. In my recent dreams I do reality checks it's odd.)

I completely forgot to post this yesterday as I was quite busy with different things. I have another dream coming after this as I had another one last night as well.

Non-Lucid
Questioning
Lucid

I was lost in a dark forest in the middle of the night. I wasn't too worried about being lost as I was just looking around. The forest itself was made up completely of pine trees and the ground was really muddy where I was walking. I made my way ot of the forest when I saw the headlights of a small truck. I saw a DC standing near the truck and I asked him if he could help me get home. He shrugged at me before saying something and driving away. There was a house nearby with a light on the front porch and I saw a robot which looked like a crash test dunmy walking towards me. It told me that it would assist me to find my way home. The scene then changed to a constrcution site/quarry and I was getting really annoyed with the robot for not helping me at all. The robot was immediatley hostile and told me it would slit my stomach open . I started running and the scene changed again to my dad's study where I slammed the door shut and held it. He didn't seem to mind much and told me to hold the door shut otherwise the robot would get me, I suddenly lost my grib on the door and scrambled to get it back before the robot burst in with a knife and started slashing at my stomach. I felt the cuts but was slightly confused when they didn't hurt in the slightest. I continued to wonder about this before I woke up.

Pretty weird one, it was creepy but didn't scare me as much as I thought it would so I'm not going to class this as a nightmare. A real change of pace to the beautiful scenes that I've had for the past few nights but that doesn't really bother me, at least I'm dreaming.

- Have my2nd Lucid Dream.
- Have a converstation with a DC.
- Fly.

Apparently I have a little brother named billy.

We were playing dodgeball together, in a way. Whoever has the ball has to hit the other person, whilst the other person dodges. The are we were in was like a residential square, there is a row of houses with their gardens facing the square. All the gardens have large black fences, probably 7ft high. One of those houses is where I lived as a kid, and this little square is where I used to play.

Billy was pretty young, like 7 years old if I were to guess. I didn't give him any chances though, everytime he tried to hit me with the ball i would dodg them never letting him hit me. Once he did hit me, and I instantly got him back, I was being pretty cruel in that regard.

This square has two objects in it, one is a 1 foot tall concrete hollow L shape. Within it's boundaries is packed with dirt to house the nettle bushes. The other is a 5 foot tall oval, also packed with dirt, until the lid in which is used to house a fully grown tree and some bushes. If you think that is strange, this exists irl.

Here I found the dream scene on google maps, and uploaded an image. http://i.imgur.com/nWwpF2J.jpg

The only difference is, all the fences were black.

We took a break, sitting behind the L shape just next to the fences. Actually, it was a specific fence directly between the tree dome and L. This was where I lived as a child. I was explaining to billy, all this, saying things like. "You know, when I was your age, this is where I used to play too." I showed him the garden of the house I lived and stuff.

It was right around this point, loads of kids appeared out of nowhere with their parents, and some how a blue trolley from work used to transport machine parts full of water appeared in front of me with soapy water and tipped out.

This distracted me and I stopped for a minute to make sure billy was still there, but he was not. Where could he have gone, i couldn't have been looking away for more than 5 seconds. Frantically, I start scanning the faces of every child there to find him, but I can't. So then I start shouting on him. Louder and Louder, but he did not answer. The adults looked at me as if I were crazy, so I was like, someones taken him, someones taken billy.

I was standing at the far side of the square now, past the far end of the L shape. I starting looking as hard as I could for a clue, tried to think if I heard anything funny. The fact I didn't even hear billy be taken away almost made me burst into tear, to think of someone abducting him, me being there and his cries unable to reach my ears. Must have been terrifying, and now I don't know where to start looking, and now, just as fast as it would take a man to snap his fingers, it was nighttime.

At a 45 degree angle upwards at the rightside of the houses, are another row of houses separated by a grass hill. At the gate of one of the gardens stood an old man. Overweight, thick framed glasses. He was wearing a red latex suit that was skin tight and covered his whole body except from his face. He emitted a red aura that you could see illuminate his surrounding area. He looked sinister and creepy, and he was staring directly at me.

I decide that must be the guy who took Billy, he is toying with me, but I don't have time to question it. I run over, I run straight passed him. Into his garden, I kickdown the door to his house, except it's not a house really. It's just one small room, in it were tables and chairs, and no Billy.

The man shouted from outside, "excuse me what are you doing, someone help this man is breaking into my home". I was convinced billy was here, I could almost feel his presence, there had to be more going on here. I threw away the tables and chairs, lifted the rug, and I saw a handle in the floor. At this point, someone came to the aid of the old man, some really big guy who looks strong, and also has nicholas cage's face, he tried to pick me up but I quickly told him that this man stole my little brother and im going to find him here. He stops for a second then begins to help me, we lift up the panel to find another panel. Panel after panel, no end to this. But I have to keep going, each panel was different, so we must be making progress. At which point we are presented with a black hole and stairs. At which point I say, you know, we might find more kids than just my little brother down there.

Just as I finish this sentence, the old man walks back in the room with a shotgun, at which point I woke up.

I became lucid in this dream because there was an alien looking little feller sitting on the floor beside a human being (dream figure). That’s more than enough to make me lucid! He was really cute, about 18” tall, dark hair, and was half body, half head, and he was kind of roundish looking. I really wasn’t too sure what he was, but he definitely had my interest. I laid down on my side right beside him, and looked him right in the eyes. His eyes were huge, and looked like he was wearing dark sun glasses, but he wasn’t. There were no pupils, just large, darkish eyes. He looked at me momentarily, said nothing, and then continued on talking to the other guy beside him.

These two guys were practicing a movie script, and were critiquing each other on their performance. My dear wife was standing behind me watching with interest. I asked her to join in with these two guys, and contribute to the script, since my wife is such a great talker. Lots of people started to gather in the room, and they were socializing. Then somebody unexpectedly started to sing ‘Happy Birthday’!

I quickly jumped to my feet, and joined in singing. People were all around me, and I was thinking, “Whose birthday is it?” Well, most of the crowd said my wife’s name (my wife’s birthday was a couple of weeks ago), and a couple of people, off to the left, said my daughter’s name (in the song). My dear wife was smiling ear to ear! I’m not sure if my daughter was there or not, because there had to have been at least 15 dream figures in this kitchen size room, but surely she was.

After the song had finished, I went exploring to left to see who had sung my daughter’s name. Surely enough it was my two older sisters. I went to my oldest sister and gave her a hug, and told her I loved her. There was a 6 ½ foot tall ‘dream authority’ towering over my dear sister, looking real nasty at her. My sister was looking real nervous. I momentarily thought about given this guy a major butt kickin’, but I remembered my conviction for no violence while dreaming, especially while lucid, so instead I went to my other sister and hugged her too. I was upset about my older sister’s predicament, so I fell off the lucidity tight rope and woke up.

I think I'm with my sister and my godmother in a car.
They have probably dropped me in the square of my home town which looks a bit funny. It seems I've already been here in the dream, so I decide to go visit a friend of mine who leaves close by and who I haven't seen for a long time. I'm going up the stairs of the squares when, suddenly, I'm lucid! [I think it has to do with the fact that the real square doesn't have any stairs like those in the dream, probably some awareness I got there].
[Actually, it was some kind of weird lucidity, because I didn't realize I have to stabilize the dream, and also everything seemed like blurry. Is this semi-lucidity?] First thing that comes to my mind is one of my short-term goals: ask a DC if they know this is a dream and what do they think about it. I turn around to look down to the square and I see a guy with long blond hair. I start going down the stairs when he starts telling a story about some friends who came to the Canary Islands to work on a winery and had gotten fired. He is French and so where his friends. Someone else is in the square, and I think it is one of my closest friends.
Well, so I have my DC. I wait until the story is over to ask him my question. When I'm about to ask I'm already next to him and, before being able to ask, he grabs my neck with his arm and he shuts my mouth with his hand. He's not being aggressive, it seems he just doesn't want me to talk. And I have the feeling that he knows what I'm going to ask. I decide to wake up.
I wake up next to a girl (a friend of mine) and a guy who seems to be the friend I had seen in the square. [Yeap, a FA, and I lost lucidity]. I had fallen sleep. I tell the girl that I think I just saw a friend of her, because she had told me before the same story about the guys who came to work on a winery. She's writing on her DJ, in the last page, where there are some formulas she's crossing out.

Other fragments:
This night was a weird night as I went to bed really late after being on the computer and I was feeling kind of funny. However, I could recall 3 other fragments of dreams (one where I'm just looking for lucidity in some cardboards in the basement of my house; and 2 other sexual-oriented with my girlfriend and... let's say "more people", kind of weird xD). In any case, I prefer to just write the more important dream of the night

Dream 1: Nightmare in Nature

I'm trying to live in the wild, apparently following some instructions downloaded from the Internet. A friend of mine (a guy) is also trying to do the same, and a common friend (a girl) is there with us too. But we are not together, we are like in the same region, but everyone is alone. She seems to have some problems with her orientation and she usually gets in troubles during the night. I'm confident with myself, but when the night comes, without light, I find myself in the middle of Nature, being stalked by the wild. I don't know where my home is.

Dream 2: Back to school

I'm at a school with a friend. We are going back to class, but we're late. My friend asks me something about some other thing that just happened. It seems I'm developing a videogame in my free time, but it's taking me a long time to properly advance. My friend asks me something like "So you're developing a videogame", insinuating that I haven't told him anything. I answer that I'm developing a videogame, but I'm doing it so slowly it could take me years to finish. He replies, laughing, that it could take me the time I would spend enrolling at Uni again and finishing Computer Science [This is my degree IWL]. I reply, laughing, that "yes, I could finish again Computer Science if I could get a grant for going back to Uni". For a moment, I think it wouldn't be a bad idea to try.
We get into the building. As it's late, everybody is in their respective classes already, and we're running through the hallways. I pass by one of the classrooms where I know the teacher, whose name is "Mario" [I know nobody like him IWL]. Everytime I pass by, we use to talk a bit. He likes to run and, as per one of her students says, he's run like 5 laps this last time [This seems to be a great achievement]. Mario and I talk about something related to the weather and he makes some reference to using a sleeveless shirt.
We finally get into our classroom, where the teacher is already doing some Math exercises. I really like this class and the type of exercise we're doing. It's like solving equations. I'm glad to see that, besides the exercise the teacher is explaining, there are 2 more equations to solve by ourselves. We enter the classroom and sit behind another student. It's a very small classroom where there could be 8-10 students maximum.

Dream 3: Unfinished bureaucracy (what a name! xD)

I'm in the offices of some public administration. I'm sit in a table with my computer, filling up a form I need to submit. Next to me there's a fax-phone, that looks just like a normal telephone but with a small tray in the bottom. This phone is inside a brown envelope. Suddenly, the fax starts working and tries to get the paper just below, but it gets stuck on the phone and it stops working. A woman approaches. She was the one that activated the fax and now it's trying to unblock the tray. She removes the paper and tries to put it in again but from outside the envelope (so it can't reach the phone). I tell her what she's doing wrong, she realizes and then she tries to put the paper from inside the envelope. And now it works!
I continue filling up the form while I'm connected to the Internet with a cable branched on my network card.
My turn is up and I can go talking to an agent that will process my form. I go to his desktop. He's a young guy, maybe from India. He's searching my computer in some sort of software he has but he can't find it. "Of course", I say, realizing my mistake, "I connected it to the Internet, but not the network". So I tell him the IP of my computer and he performs the connection. He finds the form he needs and starts working on it.
Suddenly, the turn is over and it's time to go home as the administration is going to close. But... he hasn't finished working on my form, which means I have to come back another day! I get annoyed, because it bothers me to come to this administration. Angry, I walk through the office, with my uncompleted form in my hands, looking for a boss or something. But everyone is leaving, drawing a time-for-freedom smile on their faces, so I'm soon alone in the office.
After a moment, another man arrives. He's short and he seems happy. It seems he's the boss of the new team who's just arriving to work in the building. It's just another team from another company who will be taking the offices for the rest of the day I guess.

Strange Dream

I was at a place that was big as a parking lot waiting in a huge line so that my mom and i could get the laundry done. But i was unsure why we had to wait in the line. I saw a lady running and was told she was the one in charge of the laundromat. I ran to her wanting to ask her if there was a way we could get our laundry done without waiting in the line but she said no cause she didn't like my mom. I went inside anyways and saw policemen. One of them asked if he could put his towel in the washer. The lady said yes so he put it in.

I stood in the corner observing the place when suddenly music came into the scene and the place began to transform. There were colorful light, a huge circular opening in the middle and people starting to cheer now.When i saw all this happening i wanted to get in the action and tried to make a drum beat for the music. But it didn't sync with the loud music so i stopped. After that a boy pointed in my direction and i think i fell or the place changed.

Now I was in a stadium i think and people were competing in a game. My brother asked me if i could let him play now since i already played. I was fine with it but than.suddenly a cartoon character from the cartoon "Fanboy and Chumchum" came to me. He was huge and told me he was going to destroy me. But first he would give me a toy of him and his buddy.He gave them to me and told me to make the toys love eachother in a gay sexual way.

The cartoon.disappeared than a girl came up behind me and asked me what i was told. I said he was wanted me to make the dolls have gay sex with eachother than dropped the toys. The girl said "Ew, forget about the toys and lets go before he comes back!"We sensed him coming than started to run. We ran and jumped over a lab counter. I spilled the alcohol on the tooth picks though. I moved the toothpicks to the sink than kept running with the girl.

Suddenly a teacher saw us through the window and told us to stop. But we kept running. I could feel hard sand on my feet as i ran down the hill. The girl went the other way. I jumped a bit and could feel the gravity lighter. I was sort of falling and floating in a slanted way but i stoped when i saw lots of policemen. "Whats going on?"I aske the lady. I could hear sirens too. The girl came back to me and told me to hurry up. I said "Wait. Whats happening?" Than remembered the cartoon monster we were running from. "Ohhhh. Its cause of the invasion" i said. The girl said yeah. I looked into the distance than woke up.

Secret World

I was with two anime girls and their family. We went into a crowded store and one of them bought me juice.When we left we started walking. The scene began to change many times as we were walking by. I thought of them as fun, out-going,rich alien anime people. We laughed and talked for a bit until we arrived at their apartment.I looked outside and saw that it was nightime now.

The three of us had powers and our mission was to find a secret world where their brother was. We sneeked out the window and began to fly into the night sky. There was a glittering moon shining in the distance. We felt it was the secret world but than all of a sudden giant bug creatures with ropes appeared and started to fly toward us. We flew back but than i realized i was running from something thats not real.

I told the girls to fight them because were stronger than them. Than i made a rope appear and started attacking them with it. The girls began fighting back but one of them was in trouble. I threw the rope around her than pulled her back and flew foward. But than the place changed into a school area. I saw a boy and girl with green anime hair and got excited. The boy told me that my excitement was unnecessary because he would beat me in the next duel. I laughed than told him i wouldn't let that happen. I saw a person holding letters with people's names on it and was going to read the one that said my name but than a person snatched it and ran
ran.I went into a crowd but didn't know where to look for the person. Than suddenly a boy tapped me and showed me the letter opened that i was looking for. I said thanks in a confused way and saw his face get sort of mad. So i put on a happier face than woke up.

~01/13/15 I started a wonderful morning of lucidity when in a dream many family members were at my cousins house for a small X-Mas party. My mother placed some ham in her mouth. The thing is, my mother has been a vegetarian as long as I have been alive. I did a general reality check (observing for oddities), and became lucid. I interacted a small bit with my family and then went out into the street to look for something to do. At this point my alarm went off and I hit snooze, and did DEILD.

DEILD 1 (9 minute snooze)

I was now out at night on the street I spent much of my youth on. IRL I was asleep in a hotel room and had noticed pre-sleep that the mini fridge occasionally made a loud noise of pumping fluid. I had only been looking around at the imagery for about a minute when the noise started in the room. I started to wake, but told myself, "That noise is something in the dream," but what, ummm, "It is your cousin’s husband using a welder in their house, it is still under construction." The dream began to fail, but I stabilized it with mudra awareness from my Dream yoga class. I have practiced certain hand gestures over and over and can visualize them tactilely. I closed all visuals down to just one hand and felt the mudra until I could see it. The sound was still there so I reinforced that it was coming from the house in the dream, not waking life.

I knew I would need to occupy myself around the house for a few minutes so my body would continue to accept the noisy refrigerator as something in the dream and not wake. I used to date a girl who lived across the street and early on in my LD practice would go to her door and cause her to give me oral. Maybe I should try that? I looked across the street and her house is there. I walked around behind the house to her window. I tapped on the screen, knowing a pretty blonde woman would open the window.

Well,,,, A pretty brown haired woman did open the window, but it was my Dream Guide. She seemed amused and asked me what exactly I was up. I kind of timidly said I was just going to mess around with a DC until that noise stopped. She asked if maybe it would be more productive to actually do something with my dream. I notice the sound had stopped. I agreed to try and do something productive. I looked up and the house had become a great skyscraper, so I spider climbed up the side. The imagery was abbreviated and I was on top in no time.

I looked out from the top of this monstrously tall building and was amazed. The images I saw were of a city on the astral, but the dimensions and angles defied my understanding. Up above me was a floating (?) building, but it was aligned with gravity that would be perpendicular to my own. It was massive and red with intricate architecture. I considered flying to it, but somehow (DG?) understood this would not be possible from here. I looked down and the imagery was almost like tunnel vision going forward and down onto yet another plane of separate gravity, and there was some sort of temple complex down there that looked perhaps Chinese.

I began to fly down there when the snooze alarm went off. I then DEILD again.

#400 - DILD - 8:33AM

I have a long dream that I am reading a handwritten story about surviving the zombie apocalypse on post-it notes and notebook paper. As I am reading I am in the story observing things as I find pieces of paper with the next segment of the story. I don't recall everything as a lot happened that didn't make much sense.

I have an FA and find my cousin Jared with guns and heavy artillery. He's prepping for an attack. Then he has a suction cup ball that he throws around.



The ball is spewing out some kind of water color and I think of the color run but it's all over my bedroom walls. I hope it will wash. The ball comes my way and paint gets in my mouth. I sit up and choke on it a bit then tell Jared about my dream.

*memory gap*

This maybe be a different new dream but I am in some Star Wars setting going down corridors and triggering switches. I have entered some robotic body like a mech suit or something similar. It's hard to recall all that happened but it all very video game like. during the next part I gradually become lucid without any real 'ah ha' moment. I am done with whatever I was doing and come to a new area. I see the crumbled body of Darth Vader in a corner. There seems to be some metallic connecting points in his torso and I decide that I should be able to embody him like I did with the robot. I set over him and sink in. I see the dark uniform cover my body and I stand up. I hear my Darth Vader breathing sound, "Ruuuuu. ppppprt. Ruuuuuuuu. ppppppprt." I feel dark and powerful and continue down a new set of corridors. I can' remember all that I did but activate switches, force jump over gaps, and use the force to move objects. I move swiftly through the obstacles with ease. I come the end of one section. There is a colorful panel on the floor. I decide it must the an elevator platform. I stand on it and it descends to darkness. I worry about the void here and focus on seeing the next section. After a moment I see that I am on a high catwalk with a yellow rail. I am facing the rail and decide to vault over it. I think about my method but for some reason force jumping over seems too hard. Instead I put my hands on the rail and launch a flip over the side. I worry about the visual of spinning destabilizing the dream and actually slow things down so its not too disorienting.

At the bottom and I land firmly and am facing a some sliding glass doors like at a grocery story. I use the force to open them and step out into a bright sunny day. The landscape is arid and desolate. The parking lot is cracked with weeds growing and there are no cars around. In the distance I see a vast dessert like on Tatooine. I feel lost here and unsure what to do next. I look around and see shopping carts strewn about. I use the force to throw them around. One cart lands at the feet of a dark skinned bald woman in light brown robes. Her eye narrow and she assumes a fighting stance. I realize I have started a fight with a Jedi and quickly send several shopping carts in her direction. She vanishes before my eyes just before the carts hit her. I wonder what new force power this. I am very intrigued. I wonder if she really vanished or if she was just invisible. I reach out and grab a shopping cart in each hand and begin spinning hoping to hit her if she gets near me. This destabilizes the dream and I wake up.

I quickly DEILD and visually reenter the dream. No SP or vibrations this time. I am not Darth Vader anymore but I am walking down a long gray Star Wars corridor. I pass a mirror and pause. Though I am mostly bald, I have white hair that looks a lot like Will Ferrel in Zoonlander without the part. Also, I am wearing something that looks a lot like Raiment of Arden-Sul from Shivering Isle expansion in Elder Scrolls: Oblivion. (I was playing last night)



I find the hair very distracting and I mostly want to see what I look like bald. I adjust myself so that my hair is cut of at the top of the mirror. Somehow I turn my head to the left with out changing my view. have hair on the side and back but the top is so bald. I decide I won't look too bad if I ever loose my hair in the future. Satisfied, I wonder what to do next. LSD! I finally remember my dream goal. I want to do some LSD and see what my best guess of the drug would be like in a dream. Unfortunately, this when my body decides to wake up for good.

I WBTB at 2:30AM and took 8MG Galantamine and 400MG DMAE. I kept the WBTB brief.

#399 - DILD - 5:18AM

I am what I think of as my my moms sister's house, Aunt Paula. I wake up and have to pee. I know I was trying to get lucid but I think I should take care of this. The bathroom has a strange looking toilet made of maroon colored plastic. When I open the lid something breaks and water spills all over the floor. My uncle comes in upset about the mess. He looks over the toilet and says something dismissive and leaves. I am in shock and recall this as a dream sign. I look left past the sink and see a white porcelain toilet has appeared. I become lucid at this, though I still feel the need to pee. I consider it but I now know that it's pointless and don't want to think what might happen if I try.

I walk back into the main room while I try to recall my goal. I say out loud, "I have a goal." I just can't remember. For some reason I think I wanted to summon some sort of evil magic. No that can't be right. I start to feel mild fear but I keep my emotions in check. However, it doesn't stop the evil from manifesting itself. I see movement around me. There behind red curtains. A child? The curtains part and I see a grotesquely rotted face of a demonic child. I hissed at me then into a wispy ghost and vanishes into vapor. Multiple copies of these demonic ghost children appear all around me but the moment I try to focus on them they turn to vapor and streak around. I keep my emotion level and don't allow this to turn into a nightmare. I'm actually happy this is happening. I haven't had much of a creep factor in a long time. The dream collapses here and I wake into SP.

I am on my right side and I feel really uncomfortable. My knees are touching in a way that hurts and I am really hot. I try to move but can't. I notice vibrations. I want to wake up so I open my eyes but I see the room too bright and ghostly figures. I wonder if I have even woke up. I consider holding my breath to wake up but I don't want to break the dream just yet. With great effort, I manage to roll over and remove some of the blanket. I feel better but I also notice the vibrations haven't stopped. I doubt that I have actually moved, but the effect was the same. I try opening my eyes again to see if I actually see the room. I can see the moonlight from the window and decide to try moving my hands. There is a ghostly image of me shaking my hands in front of my face. Again I doubt that I am even really seeing my room and as I watch my body releases and I am dumped out of bed. I go blind again and feel my way into the living room noticing what my hands and feet touch with great detail. I pause for a moment and try summoning a woman like in a recent LD, but it doesn't happen and I really don't want to go there anyway.

I am at the front door now still trying to see but all I get is random images like heavy hypnagogic imagery. I decide that I am trying too hard to see. I relax a bit and forget about the problem. I focus on feeling the detail of the front door as I try to see what I am touching. The images vanish to black, then suddenly, I see. I am looking out the glass storm-door into a version of my front yard. Excited, I quickly rush out. My vision becomes blurry as if I am underwater. I notice it is raining. My yard doesn't end at a street but seems to continue into a wooden area. The closer I get to the edge of the yard the more the dream area seems to stop there until there is a definite cut off into black void. I stop and turn back. There are some unfamiliar cars in the drive way under a carport. My house look unfamiliar. I fall to my hands and knees and feel the grass to stabilize. I try to feel the rain but there is very little sensation. I know I had a goal but I still can't remember. I shout very loud, "I HAVE A GOAL!" I can't think. All I recall is that same summoning-evil-thought. No. Not again. I let that go. After a moment I realize that I am trying too hard again. I relax my mind and body and decide to forget about my goal. I don't worry about losing lucidity here as I feel mentally solid and locked in. I get up and find a car in the spot I was crawling around. Some blue sedan. My vision is still odd as I feel for a door handle. I'm really not keen on going for a drive but if this is all I get I'll go for it. Just as I am about to open the door I see a tiny gray kitten come up to me. It has a tiny meow and sounds like it's in distress or really hungry. I pickup the kitten and say, "Oh poor little kitty. You're hungry aren't you?" I put it up to my chest and chin and give it a little hug. I decide it would be cool to get the cat to talk so I begin talking to it, asking it if it is hungry. It meows but I am persistent and tell it that I want to hear words. Finally, I hear a little girl voice say that it is very hungry. I need to get her inside and feed her.

Just inside the front door there is an open room with someone in a bed. The light is on and everything is very vivid. Curious I go in with the kitty in my arms. I say in a weak voice, "Who are you?' The figure stirs and seems to wake up. I see her face. She looks like an odd and young version of my dead grandmother (Nanny). I don't want to admit this because I am getting a very strange vibe from her. I recall that normally I am excited when she visits my dreams but something is different here. I say in a much stronger voice, "Who are you?"
She sits up now, "I am not whole."
I feel really uncomfortable now, "O... Ok."
She looks at me intently and asks expectantly, "Who do I look like?"
I tell her the answer she wants by saying my grandmothers full name.
The woman stands up and laughs, "Ha ha... yes!"
I say, "But, you are different." I don't like this woman and try to dismiss her, "Ok. Well, I am going now." I take kitty with me to the kitchen table and sit her down. I decide to treat her more like a human and let her eat here. The strange woman has followed me and sits down in a dining chair. I decide to pay her little attention and let her do whatever. I leave the kitten with her and walk into the kitchen where the cat food bin is. There is some instability here and decide I don't need to actually get the food. I blind summon a the food scoop and make a motion with my hand like I getting cat food. As I walk back to the table I have a small amount of cat food in the scoop. I pour it out on the table and kitty starts to eat ravenously. I notice she is having a hard time biting the hard food and I say something to the woman about this. When I look at her, her face has changed again. She still looks like a version of my grandmother but has become younger and very pretty. I being to have some arousal but think this is way too weird to have any sort of fun with her. I look back kitty and she quickly runs under the table as if she is now afraid. I comment about her strange behavior as I wake up.

16th January 2015

---

Ok so yesterday evening I had a two hour massage. When I returned home, I did a mindfullness meditation with some initial energy work to get me in the correct vibration. I held a raw piece of moldavite in my right hand, my quartz record keeper in my left and on the table infront of me there was my moldavite bracelet with a small quartz cluster in the middle and next to it was a fluorite cluster. I kept on slipping into a deam state during the meditaion and the mediation turned into a flux between seeing and interacting with dream images and me noticing it, then refocusing on my breath. The meditation lasted 50 minutes. After that I was chatting to relatives online and as a result I went to bed about 2 hours later than usual. Earlier in the day I had made a recording on my phone with me saying 3 times, each one minute apart, "You're dreaming" and "You're in a dream". I set this as an alarm on my phone and I set it to go off about 01:15. I heard it go off and I woke up. I decided I would get up so I look at the phone and the time is exactly 01:11. Stayed awake until about 03:00 and then went back to bed. Took me a while to get back to sleep. At one point I was able to see the room with my eyes closed! I could actually see the reflective surface of the cupboard door and when my GF went to the toilet I could see the door open. I tried waving my had infront of me a few times and I could see movement but couldn't really see my hand. Felt and looked exactly the same as the times this has happened to me before (see note 1). Had a real sense of perception and depth and the same strange sensation you get from seeing with your eyes closed. After a short while it actualy feels quite natural and you kind of forget they are closed.

Below is the dream that I recorded when I woke up at approximately 05:00. I had also set the voice signal to go off on my phone again.


Location: @ home
Tools Used: raw moldavite, quartz record keeper and mobile phone
Others In Room: sleeping next to GF
Unusual Activities During The Day: See above

Dream

I can remember hearing the first voice signal on my phone. I can't remember hearing the other two. When I became lucid I was inside a house/buiding. Everything was white and it had a very light and airy feel. I felt like my vibration had been lifed considerably. I felt very light and connected. Very open. I started walking through the house allowing myself to become more and more lucid. I remember feeling so good. So high in vibration but I could feel someting on my back. Like there was an uncomfortable pressure across part of my back. I tried to sort it but it wouldn't go away, so I assumed that it was my body in the bed and the sensation has transferring through to the dream. I though to myself after what felt like a few minutes 'Ok, I'm getting distracted now. What was it I was planing on doing when I became lucid?' After a few seconds of puzzling over this I remembered! 'I was going to do the Keys of Ascention meditation technique!'. Upon this rememberance I heard my GF's voice say "Oh my God!" and I though 'I wonder what's happened?' So I went in search of her. I saw a door that I wanted to go into and there was a female DC standing just before it in another small room. She was folding towels and putting them neatly away. She appeared to be a maid and as she crossed my path she gave me a side glance and half seductevly, half lovingly smiled at me. As I passed her I brushed my hand against her ass and I walked to the door and opened it. Inside there were 4 girls standing around, all nannys, and there were two babys. The girls had all been admiring the babys when I arrived and now they were all looking at me, slightly puzzled. I looked at one of the babys and he screwed his face up at me. The girls all laughed and so I decided to screw my face back up towards the baby in a playful manner. As I tried to screw my face it felt like it wouldn't move, so I tried with more force and I then started feeling my body in the bed. I instantly understood that I must have actually been doing that to my face in my waking reality body and it was waking me up. I tried to relax myself and stay calm but I was on a slippery slope and was in the bed awake withing a few seconds.

I stayed awake for another couple of hours and although I'm wide awake I decide to have another sleep. So I load up my oil burner with water that my herkimer diamond has been cleansing in for a few days and I put frankincense and sandalwood in it (see note 2) along with clary sage which relaxes me tremendously. The moldavite and quartz are still under my pillow. I fall asleep in bed after a short time reading. I'm very briefly woken about 20 minutes later by my GF leaving for work and I remember what I've been dreaming:

I was in a small room and I was holding an iron (as in an iron for clothes) in my hand. The metal part of the iron was not soild. It was hollow and open at the top and inside it was brown powder. I was waving the iron around and skipping around the room causing the powder to come out and go into the air. It was all around me and as I was breathing it in it was making me feel really really good! It was like pure love energy, making me feel very high in vibration. I was semi lucid throughout the dream.

I woke up again 2 hours later, having had a very deep sleep with no recollection of any dreams.


Thoughts/Notes

note 1: I've been able to see with my eyes closed quite a few times before. Twice when I was working offshore mid 2014 which was definitley due to me using the baramay device on a daily basis. The other times were during a 30+ hour ibogaine session. Happened a lot of times and was quite clear. I should also note that I've just started using the baramay device in meditation again a few days ago after a very long break from it.

note 2: Both frankincense and sandalwood make your brain release more melatonin. Herkimer daimonds help me to sleep and are widely regarded as one of the best crystals for all things sleep related.