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Date: March 8, 2013 ||| Time Block: 12:00 PM to 3:00 PM ||| Length: 3 minutes. ||| Lucidity: level 2. ||| Entry Type: DILD ||| Major Methods: WBTB

Methods: lay in bed to take a nap.

Summary: had a number of short dream clips in which I was lucid; I don't feel like recollecting them right now. (it was accidental lucidity, since I haven't been focusing on lucid dreaming for a while now)

The later part of the morning I was still under the influence of my mugwort/peppermint tea combo.

I have a FA in some bedroom. It is dark. I hear my son crying. My wife asks me to get him. I get out of bed in a daze.

I am driving in a car across town. My wrist watch beeps it hourly chime. I think I missed my prospective memory alarm. Before I can think to do a nose plug I become confused. I ask myself when I started wearing a wrist watch. I try to think back but can't remember. While I contemplate this I can vividly feel the weight and pressure of it on my arm as I make a turn. I am close to being lucid when I suddenly realize that I was supposed to get my son! I panic and turn the car around and go back.

I am now in some work place. I don't work here and I find it hard to get anyone to let me in the back. I take a wheeled trash can and pretend to be a janitor. I push it into the back hallway. The real janitor stops me and says not to go back there. I tell her I need to take the trash out. She tells me that is her job. I say ok fine but I am still going back here. She doesn't try to stop me.

I wonder around a cubicle area then what looks like a dentist office. I can hear my son and follow his sounds into a dark back room. I see him standing in a play pen. I am amazed that he is walking and urge him to walk to me. He takes a few steps and I pick him up. I take a picture of him to post to Instagram. I add some #hashtags and then try to forward it to my wife. Its not working right so I just decide to tell her. Then I get a strange text from my mom. It is an easter invitation. She asks me if we are coming over to eat Easter Sunday. I have no idea how to answer her so I ignore it. I pass my sister and her husband on the way out and assume he stayed with them for the night.

When I get back to the room my wife is gone and I am not longer holding my son. B, my wifes cousin, is there but she has blond hair. I notice but say nothing. I sit down on my bed and she starts complaining about getting in the shower. She tells me my wife is taking forever in there. Suddenly her hair looks wet. I tell her this. She shrugs me off. I tell her I'm needing one too. I look at my wrist watch (wtf) and its past 8. I think at this rate we will all be late.

The alarm wakes me.

*Snooze*

My cousin and his wife are talking. She is pregnant and crying about the baby. She is worried about it for some reason. For some reason I think they are coming to live with us soon.

*Snooze*

I am making out with my wife. The tactile sensation is high. I notice that she feels different so how. I am reminded of someone else from my past. I pull back to see her face. It looks like my wife for sure. I continue. Things get heated up when the alarm wakes me for the final time.

Was in some giant gym with another kid. There were two ropes and other types of swings all over the place. If the kid sat on one swing and I sat on the other we would balance each other out and fly around the gym. I was also on the pez slightly. We did all kinds of tricks as we swung around. It was really fun and I told the kid I never had so much fun in a long time.

I shared an apartment with 3 other roommates including Dustin. We had a lot of fun and love for each other. There would be parties and other events there all the time. I missed a huge party by staying with Kara for one night and they were sad. We went to some store to try and steal some clothes but we never were able to do it. Kara and I left together to go to a show. It was a circus type show in Colorado. We noticed how much nicer Colorado was than Seattle and happy we moved there. Half way through the show I ran onto the stage and sat down with the performers. None of them seemed to notice and they thought I was part of it. There was a girl that was performing crazy yoga and gymnastic moves. There was going to be a yoga performance and I asked if I could join. I was able to go, but the ground was so bouncy and soft that I could not do any moves so I just stood there with my hands in the air.

I guess now i can join the 'People who have been on DV in a dream' club.

Dream 1:

I was chatting with LV over skype and we were playing a game that is mix of various games. There was one segment that looked like paper-drawn platformer of sorts and later there was some sort of area with vehicles. I selected some sort of tank and i was then falling from the sky on it and then destroying everything after landing, it had huge sort of powerful railgun.
Then we have played other part of game in multiplayer, it looked like level was from Doom with those textures and such, but out characters were from some other game i am not sure of, can only say that we played as some kind of humanoid robots, and weapons were hightly modified weapons from Unreal Tournament 2004. They didn't looked like them visually, but firing modes were partially similar, except that they were much more overpowered. For example there was one gun that for primary fire had attack like Flak Cannon from UT2004, but with a bit more horizontal spread and whenever it was fired, the shooter was getting like 10x boost to movement speed, alt fire was like alt fire from Flak Cannon from UT2004 as well but it was reloading 4x faster. Also i recall weapon that was like Bio Rifle from UT2004, except it worked more like shotgun.
There were also AI bots, later on they changed their models to something that resembled characters from MLP(which i do not watch), which annoyed me, i also screenshot of them and sent them to LV, but he was suddenly AFK. Dream ended shortly.

Dream 2(fragment):

I was browsing dreamviews and there was some thread about two types of dream recall or something like that.

I simmered 5 Tablespoons each of mugwort and peppermint leaves in 3 cups water for 20 minutes before bed so it would be ready to go when I woke for WBTB

Dose time: 3:30ishAM

MILD

My daughter, D, is watching me edit a photo on my laptop. The picture is blurry but it soon clears up. It is a close up action shot of my non cartoon self having sex with either Elektra Ovirowa or Faye Valentine from Cowboy Bebop. It's hard to tell because it was a close up vag shot! I become horrified and tell D not to look. I have to cover her eyes while I struggle to shut the comp down. Nothing will respond. Finally I just close the lid.


I have a micro awakening and realize that I see a lot of HI. I think I should WILD but really want MILD to work. I see a post on the forum with the title: YOU SHOULD WILD WITH MUGWORT. I look closer but the letters look Russian now. I click on the link.

Cowboy Bepop DEILD - Wake time: a little after 5AM

I have another micro awakening and decide maybe I should take my own advice. I DEILD into a Cowboy Bebop dream. I am running in a cartoon world from Vincent and Elektra Ovirowa. The landscape and animation reminds me of Borderlands. I see a tunnel and crawl into it. Now, I am trapped so I turn and wait with a drawn pistol. I see her shadow peering in with a gun. I shoot. I get a brief visual of a head shot but it's like a clip from the movie when the idiot dude gets shot in the head on the train.

I lose focus and can't think of what to do next. The dream sort of hiccups and my subC continues non lucid.

I am on a contact device like one of the computers used in the movie. It has a highly graphical touch screen. I tell the kid to get Faye Valentine to pick me up. Then, for some reason, I throw the device on top of a cliff.

Suddenly, Vincent emerges from the shadows and stands over me. He is smirking.



I see a circular symbol and words above him like video game stats.
LVL 12 PLAYER
MAROONED
NO WEAPON

I know we must now race to reach the extraction point. It is where I threw the device on top of the cliff. The first one there wins. I think of a cave system that I ran through earlier to reach the top faster. (False Memory?) I see it in my mind and I run that direction.

My perspective switches and I see a strange bird flying to the extraction point at high speed. It is a cross of these two birds from Rescuers Down Under


My son wakes me up.

I'm standing at the top of a hill in my neighborhood. It's right outside of the pool parking lot and it's looking down to another hill that goes up into another neighborhood. There are a lot of other cars that crowd the lot and I assume there's a swim meet going on. Someone calls me to go there but the dream collapses.

Another fragment I'm going to a party that has already started. I drive up to this parking lot with several cars in it. I park it horizontal to a parking space and step out to see body guards walking past me. My friend Moo comes through the entrance door with a smoking device and starts to smoke it as he walks towards me. I walk up to him and grab it then smoke it as the adults are still walking by. We go in to see it's some world of warcraft style view with orcs killing each other.

I'm at a party with my friends Katharine and Katie and some guys from a different school. One of the guys is hitting on Katharine as I'm laying down talking to some girl I don't know. We decide to leave so as the girls walk into the next room the guys start whacking off as I'm watching. I remember there being an abnormal amount of semen coming out.

I had a dream that i got arrested last night. They let me go, but the guy left one handcuff on. I was trying to find out if any of my friends had an old key to unlock it.

I was with some friends in a building of some sort. we were looking for things for some reason. we found them, and then the lights went out. i couldn't see a thing. Then I heard footsteps. They were getting louder. I tried to shout or something, but my voice failed me. I vividly remember the feeling of pure terror that i felt. It was the strongest emotion I have felt in a dream. Then, as the steps got louder, the lights came on. It was some harmless person that i can't remember because i think the shock woke me up.

As a side note, I asked a friend of mine, and weird dreams like this could be linked to me trying to create a tulpa. which is cool i guess

Last night I said some mantras to try to induce a lucid dream. No such luck...I did have a quite an interesting dream though. I was in a very nice house with some important people - some kind of get together. Apparently Bill Cosby was head of the house. We were really getting along and he enjoyed my personality. He said "Come this way, I'd like to show you something." I followed him down a dark hallway and saw two large doors at the end of it. The doors were separated about an inch - enough for me to realize that there were women tied up to chairs in there! Before walking any closer I bolted out of the house. I ran down the street. It was cold out and I was in some everyday neighborhood with average looking houses. I ran up the stairs to one and banged on the door. A smaller blonde woman opened up and let me in. I said "I know this sounds crazy but someone down the street tried to attack me! I don't have a cell phone could I please use your phone!?" I remember not being able to get my words out clearly. She agreed to let me in. I sat down at the table. She had a man living with her. She was maybe in her late 20s and he looked early 40s. He was very nice. They seemed like friends. I told them both about everything going on.

Moments later we were joined by who was supposed to be the man who looked like Bill Cosby's wife. I was terrified when she entered the door. She was white, had hair a few inches above her shoulders. She was glowing and good looking for someone who was supposed to be in their 60s. We had dinner together and everything seemed fine. At the end of dinner Bill Cosby's wife said "You have it all wrong". My husband isn't the man who killed you and this is all your imagination. I panicked. Suddenly her glowing face turned back to normal which was the average face of someone her age and the woman in her 20s disappeared. She led me outside and showed me that I was laying on the ground and the man who killed me was the man I had just met in the house I ran to! How bizarre.

Yo DreamViews. It's been a LONG time but I think I'm gonna start trying to have LDs again. I've been trying to DEILD but not much success yet, but this was an awkward dream I had last night that I only remember bits and pieces of.

The first part I really only remember is being in my friend's living room and Michael Jackson was there. I wasn't even baffled that he was somehow alive. And(this is where it escalates) he was a female now, and he was...well...raping someone. If I recall correctly I then proceeded to inform the police and he was arrested. Yeah, weird.

The next portion I remember is being at my church. The actual place we have it was different-looking(as usual in dreams). We were doing our ice-breaker(our Pre-teaching activity) which were all having a singing contest. I raised my hand to join in, but I wasn't selected. Somewhat pissed I remained in my seat and just observed. Everyone sang a song and the final person was this one girl I like. It was a beautiful song and a beautiful voice. The girl brought herself to tears from the song and everyone applauded. By this point I was determined to start impressing people with my voice(I honestly suck IRL). So after leaving with some of my good friends I began singing the whole way home. The only two songs I recall singing were "Pieces" and "Slipping Away" by Sum 41. My friends were getting quite annoyed now so I stopped, accepting defeat. Finally we drove by a local college. For some reason we were driving on the sidewalk of the campus. I noticed my friend coming out of the school so we pulled up to him(weird cause neither of us are in college...). He put his hand on his pants like he was going to pull a a gun, but then he saw it was just me. He must've thought a pedophile was trying to pick him up. After that I don't remember much of anything.

I woke up this morning and reviewed these things. First off, why the fuck did I dream about female rapist Michael Jackson?! Next I was weirded out by the whole singing thing. The rest I just said whatever.

I was talking with NewArtemis yesterday about mantras and lucid dreaming and apparently the conversation stuck... well, for me at least. Popped a B6 and chowed down on some raisins before bed and got this pair of dreams. This is really a micro-lucid followed by a full LD, but they're so related that I'm just journaling them together.

Color legend: Non-dream Dream Lucid

Lucid #74: Mantras in the Green Valley

I am in a large, brightly lit room of white marble. There are a lot of strange, rectangular foam blocks lying around. I decide that they represent sleep cycles or maybe chunks of REM. I say out loud, "You will have a lucid dream!" I feel like this mantra is very important. Who am I saying this to?

Now I see NewArtemis perhaps ten feet away, standing there looking sleepily around, apparently not noticing me. She has one or two foam blocks at her feet but I think she needs more. I toss a couple more of these at her and they bounce off of her and land nearby. I'm disappointed that I can't seem to add REM (or whatever) to her sleep. I say again, "You will have a lucid dream!" but it seems to make no impression on her.

I decide that she's already asleep and dreaming. "You're dreaming right now!" I tell her. "Don't you remember your mantra?" I put a hand on her left shoulder and she gives me this bleary-eyed look. I suddenly get it straight that I'm the one who's dreaming. "This is a lucid dream! Okay, now you!" I say, but she stares at me uncomprehendingly. I quickly wake up.

Try to DEILD but accidentally think about work. (Gah, rookie mistake!) Awake for a while. Then back into a non-lucid...

I'm in the back seat of a jeep that's pulled over on the side of the road. The jeep is being driven by my friend TB. Someone I don't know is in the passenger seat and he's pouring his heart out to TB because he had to shoot someone in self-defense. TB tells him not to worry about it and makes some sort of slightly offensive joke about it. The passenger gets even more upset, but TB calms him down.

TB puts the jeep back on the main road and ahead of us is a one-lane bridge with 10-feet concrete walls on either side of it. Looking further out, I see that we are in the most beautiful green valley that I've seen in my entire life. I feel like it's the most brilliant green that I've ever seen in my life and realize that I have to be dreaming.

Now the jeep has become a long van with four or five rows of bench seats. I float out of my seat and swim toward the front of the van. TB is still driving, but the passenger is someone else. I think it's Xanous.

As I pass the third or so row of seats, I see NewArtemis to my left, looking out the window at the green valley. "[NewArtemis]! This is a lucid dream." She looks at me, then looks back out the window, then back at me again. But now she has transformed nto a blonde woman in her mid-40s. I decide that this isn't working, so I swim further up.

I make it to the second row of seats, w/ TB and (presumably) Xanous right in front. I look out the window and see a mountain rising in the distance. Now I realize that we're driving toward Angel Falls for Task of the Year! Things start feeling unstable, and I reach out to grab onto something. I grab onto a nearby female DC (a stranger) to bring myself back into the scene, but things don't stabilize. The skin on the lady's face begins to glow slightly orange, and everything fades out but this glow. Then I'm awake.

So just for the record, I've gotten lucid three times in the past four days. >.> But I haven't felt like recording them because the one from Tuesday just totally disappeared from memory, and the one from yesterday I remember basically nothing of either, but I remember all of the non-lucid bits both before and after it. I guess I might add that one in here.... But the first one, I want to say that nothing important happened. But I might just want that to be the case. ._. There's really no way to say for sure. The second one... I'm pretty certain that the only thing I did was phasing, which is of course nothing new for me. I remember experiencing it and everything, I just don't really remember the experience itself. Oh well, the one from last night very much made up for it....

Oh, and for the last few days I've been taking 400 mg of L-theanine a day, divided into two doses of 200 mg with one in the morning and one in the late afternoon or early evening, usually.

Yesterday

#1 - But why are we in a skyscraper to begin with? [Non-Lucid]

I was in some school class in a huge skyscraper in some downtown area, and there were random people I graduated from high school with, this girl who sits behind me in my speech class I'm taking this semester at college, and my parents, for some reason. There was a massive storm coming our way with tornadoes visible through the windows and everything, and I was holding my mom's hand as we were all scared. There's a flashforward and things get hazy, but I remember seeing people evacuate but thinking that it wasn't on the same day but it was the same "windy season"....

#2 - Who would build a bathroom like this!? >_< [DILD]

The details of this have gotten hazier since I didn't care to write it down at first, but there was some gigantic computer mouse whose cord stretched all the way across some city streets, and it got pulled away and I tried to chase it but lost track of it. I remember seeing my old high school friend AB's car, but then things get blurry.... This is around where I became lucid and phased but then my next memory picks again at the non-lucid point. :T I was spending the night somewhere with AB, M, and these guys J and Ma who I met through M. The next morning, I woke up and started blasting some really heavy club music and M got excited, and her boyfriend D, who's suddenly there, turns to me and says something like "We can catch up later." I then realized that I needed to go change my clothes so I went to the bathroom to do so, but there were big windows all over the door so it was very easy to see inside. Everyone was oriented in the direction of the windows, but just not looking directly into them, but of course it was making me very uncomfortable at the thought of starting to change. J was saying maybe they should turn in a different direction, but then I woke up.

Today

Last night, I took 250 mg of choline bitartrate immediately before going to bed. I'm fairly certain this had an effect, particularly on the lucid.

#1 - This would have been great to become lucid for!! [Non-Lucid]

I was playing some bizarre new PSP game the whole time, and there actually was something going on in the rest of the dream too but I pretty much missed it all because I was so focused on playing, so I don't really remember the plot anymore. What I remember about the game was that it had a setup where you had a team of playable characters that reminded me of the structure of NIS games, but it was mixed with a simulated life raising element like chao from the Sonic Adventure and Sonic Advance games, and the actual creature and level designs were sort of Pikmin-like. I really wish I could've played more of it because it seemed really interesting, but that's about all I can recall of it, and I remember walking up stairs or something maybe to see my speech professor... but no more solid details than that.

I woke up from this dream with a very strong headache. I'm fairly certain that my head was smashed into this part of the backboard of my bed and that's what caused it, because the pain slowly went away in a way that I can only relate to when you wake up with a numb arm and it slowly returns to normal, but it was my first time having that type of thing happen so I can only guess. But I really hope that that's what happened because otherwise it would mean I woke up with a severe unexplained headache. >___>

#2 - I could've told them this would happen... somehow. [Non-Lucid]

I was in a high school PE class (though I think the setting might actually have been my elementary school, sort of?) with O and people kept trying to give him balls that corresponded to different sports, but I remember equating these to video game weapons in my mind and thinking that they were doing it wrong because they didn't realize that "his growth charts are unique". Eventually he decided to play what I think was registered as either baseball or golf... but it's really just a bunch of balls bouncing around and people chasing after them with no clear goals. He makes the "winning play" I believe when at least one of the teams is "frozen" at 23 seconds left on the timer, but it switches to this weird TV view for it that only shows symbols to represent the player. He was excited that they run, but due to the odd way I saw it play out I asked him for verification that he actually was the reason they won, claiming that "they only showed the overhead", or some such nonsense. Suddenly he got all depressed at the thought because he didn't realize that he had won it, he thought he was just a part of it, so we asked some other guy and he said that that was the case. Suddenly O sank into despair, and this guy PR who I've known since elementary school tries to ask him what's wrong and cheer him up or something, but he proclaims that he may never play that sport again, and then walks out of the gym all dejected as class ends. On the way out I was trying to think of a way to explain his reaction to PR, but I couldn't really think of a good way to phrase it before I woke up.

#3 - I think it might have been inspired by Buffy? [DILD]

This was an odd driving dream, and I'm fairly certain I've had something like this happen before.... Basically, I was driving home in the snow at night, and I was stuck driving from the back seat where there was an accelerator but no breaks. As a result, I was forced to drive very slowly and frequently take my foot off the gas so that I wouldn't gain too much momentum. I have no idea why I didn't think to just climb up to the front seat, but I know that there was a car driving behind me too, so maybe I just didn't want to mess with the situation and cause any trouble. We came over this bridge in my neighborhood, and then when I turned on to my street it was suddenly daytime. Somehow I managed to go too far beyond my house though, and then this car started coming down the street in the other direction right for me, and I perceived someone else as being in the car with me at this point too, but I don't recall ever seeing anyone.... I started thinking "shit shit shit" because I couldn't stop the car or change the direction it was going in very easily, and then we ended up headbutting the other car. This is all unbelievably vivid... perhaps a mix of the supplements and the adrenaline boost? I started trying to rationalize this situation because I didn't want to have to actually be in a car crash again, and then I thought to myself "Wait, could this be a dream? This whole thing is pretty odd...." I climbed into the front seat and by then I had a feel for my state of mind and was sure of it, so I became lucid.

At this point I looked around at the street and the sky and just stared. This was one of those lucids that leaves you completely in awe from start to finish as you repeatedly tell yourself "There's no way a dream could be this real." As I looked over the neighborhood, there was no distribution of focus as in a regular dream, it was all fully rendered as a single image. It seemed exactly as if I was seeing it in waking life in every way, minus the snow. I ended up driving back down to where my house was (and I think it was using my first car which is long gone), and when I got there my house was pretty different. It was tall and thin, spanning multiple floors, whereas the real one has only one floor and is much more wide than tall. There were also large windows spanning most of the front face, and it had some kind of Greek-esque architectural design for what looked almost like a tomb on the ground floor, and it was covered in plant vines and everything. There was some large inscription at the top of this part, which was totally made out of stone, and I didn't get a good look at all of it but I do remember seeing the word "SOUL" in large print. Again, this was all extremely vivid. I wanted to go inside and check it out, as the front door was still right there where it should have been in the middle of that framework, but about that time I started feeling a headache again and woke up.

*sigh* That would've been cool to explore. That headache, too... not the real one, but this one in the lucid. It felt like the ones I get when I smoke too much or the last few times I tripped. I'm really starting to wonder if it's hippocampal in origin, and if the choline brought it out.... I guess this break from smoking will probably help in more ways than I thought, because it's going to be annoying if that headache keeps making an appearance in lucids. :/ Hopefully it was just a one-time thing though, and overall I still consider this dream very successful.

03.08.2013

Old Hag Syndrome (DILD)

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID

I "wake up," incredibly thirsty. "Definitely gotta get up and get some water," I think groggily. My mouth is so dry that my tongue is practically sticking to the back of my throat.

When I open my eyes, the first thing I see is a tall, dark figure. It is a tall old woman, wearing a black hat and a big black dress. I stare at the woman calmly, fully believing that I'm really just seeing a normal object, my refrigerator maybe, and that my brain is just still half asleep and making me hallucinate. I fully expect her to disappear within a few moments.

She doesn't.

Instead, she glares directly into my eyes and lunges right at me! I let out a yelp of terror and shut my eyes. "OhmygodOhmygod I'm being attacked," I think frantically.

Then I realize that I can't move and that I've been stuck in sleep paralysis this whole time.

The realization actually makes me feel a bit better. At least now I know that the old woman isn't really real. Every time I open my eyes, I see her back in the doorway. Each time, she lunges toward me. I always close my eyes before she reaches me. Even though I know she's not real, it's still creepy as hell.

I really want to look at my clock: my one anchor to the physical world. But with the old hag constantly attacking me, I can't focus enough to do so. I have to get rid of her.

I open my eyes once more. The old woman comes toward me. I focus on speaking. "Don't. Touch. Me." It is an effort to get the words out, but I am pleased at how dangerously angry I sound. At the same time, I use an old trick of mine: I gather my fear and send it outward in an aggressive wave. The old woman halts in her tracks, stunned at my sudden retaliation.

After her initial shock, she says something along the lines of, "I will destroy you!"

"You can't hurt me," I growl in the same deadly tone.

She cackles. "Wanna bet?" She grabs ahold of my elbow. Pain radiates down my arm, but I've had worse and I only laugh.

"Even if you can hurt me, it doesn't make any difference," I taunt. "You're not real. You don't even exist."

Infuriated, she releases her hold on me and howls in rage.

"Now get away from me!" I yell. She stands in the doorway for the rest of the dream, not daring to attack again.

Now I can look at the clock. I struggle to make out the numbers: It's almost six in the morning. I've been stuck in SP for a while now, and I'm getting sick of it. SADLY, I fail to remember that I'm SUPPOSED to turn it into an LD or an OBE. Instead, I focus all my efforts into trying to wake myself up.

Nothing I do is helping. The only physical parts of me that I can control are my breathing, my eyes, and my tongue, but I can't do anything significant enough to wake myself up! Now that I'm not being attacked (and the vibrations aren't as intense as they have been), I'm getting incredibly bored and fed up with being forced to lie here not doing anything. How much longer could this possibly LAST!?

Screaming at my roommate to wake me up just results in more pointless hallucinations. So I remain stuck in SP for a while longer until I FINALLY snap out of it and wake up for real.

took:
- no 5-HTP before going to sleep
- 1 dose galantamine + choline
- 2400mg Piracetam when I got up
lucid dreaming: 3 lucid experiences
note:
- after not taking galantamine for a long time, it came on very strong. Each lucid dream I didn't even require a RC, I just expected to be lucid dreaming. If I had to guess it felt like I realized the feeling of galantamine and that was enough to understand what was happening.

I haven't had a lot of sleep and I'm up watching the Matrix. I'm just wondering if whether I would take the red pill or the blue pill.