All DJ Entries

I was either in Seattle or Portland, it was hard to tell from underground. I was walking with my family away from some sort of transportation terminal, I think. In the last hallway to the door to outside, we passed a girl (guy?) I knew from Georgia named Devan. She was walking with someone that looked very similar to her, and was either her boyfriend or a cousin. I said hi and asked her why she was in Seattle/Portland. I never got an answer. In any case, she was walking toward us but decided to walk with us.

We got outside, and we were in a parking lot. It was barely before the crack of dawn, and I think the time of day changed wildly throughout the course of the dream. My father immediately ran out in front of 2 cars in a line and ordered them to stop, because he had an orange caution vest on. They stopped only a foot or so away from my dad. I ran after him, asking him "why are you being such an asswad?" He was rummaging through the trunk of his Outback, but stopped and jumped in the driver's seat. I got into the passenger side backseat. He drove a very short distance to a pair of pink jeeps, and began to jack one of them. The second pink jeep mysteriously disappeared. I asked dad why he had to be jacking such a gaudy and obvious to find car. He must of listened to me, because he stopped jacking the car and got into the passenger seat. I looked back at the first pink jeep and it was also gone, disappeared into thin air. I assumed by previous position in the Outback. Dad shifted the car into drive, and off we were.

For some reason, I could steer the car, sorta. Not every well. But even more miraculous, there was a brake on the passenger side of the car and my legs were JUUUUST long enough to reach it with my toes. Since we were driving in the parking lot and dad didn't have any intention of slowing down, I tried numerous times to brake and avoid cars and walls. For the most part, other cars could avoid us but the wall could not. Dad said he'd put the crash into the wall on his tab. The dream ended from my alarm.

I had had a massive house party but someone had trashed my house, there was a detective/counsellor (I think hired him, he is a famous actor but I cant remember his name and I was thinking at the time who strange it was that all of a sudden he was a detective) Then as he was asking me questions about what had happened to work out who the culprit was. There was this black guy who I was convinced it was as after the party he looked really shady, but as I remembered more things (which somehow got played out like a flashback) I realised it was actually me that made the massive mess, then somehow I ended up in the same toilet cubicle as the black guy then one thing led to another...

*The actor was Ben Miller

1. debajo de un puente, churubusco pero en un pueblo, veia de lejos un acto político, la entrega de tractores a campesino. me acercaba y había canastas de mimbre y gente sentada bajo el puente. mi hermanita manejaba un auto por una avenida con camellon, se equivocaba de vuelta y le decía que volviéramos.

2. fiesta de una amiga, luces neón, gente borracha. saludaba a mi amiga por su cumpleaños. un salón de fiestas. afuera había una kermés. todo muy colorido. tenía la sensación de que era muy tarde.

3. un gimnasio. usaba unas caminadoras. un grupo de chicas. dormía con tres de ellas en el mismo colchón.

Went to bed without framing up a question. Been unsure of where to go with the questioning. Dreamview was fast paced and quick changing. There were several scapes that were notable..

One was in the basement of the house I grew up in. I was with others, people I know, family and others. I was looking for something it seemed while at the same time trying to repair something. It seemed I was feeling the presence of what I was looking for somewhere on the backside of a stairwell leading up to another floor. It seemed as if hidden in the structure behind a wall, under the very steps one would walk up to the next floor on.
The view shifts up onto the roof. I am trying to put a elaborate stone/metal one piece chimney cap on the chimney. The chimney area has some sort of temporary structure built over it. I am having to work in this tight area and it is getting frustrating for some reason. As I am looking down the chimney hole, I also feel the presence of what I had been looking for down near the chimney well, down in the structure near the stairwell I was previously at.
The cap is tedious to put in place and just as I think I get it, it falls over and breaks somewhat. Anger arises and it then breaks into many pieces without me throwing it even.

View shifts and I am in a industrial yard driving a load and also walking around at times. This same area is as in another dream I had months ago I now realize, when I was moving material around in a snowstorm with the snow burying everything and making moving difficult.
View shift to driving in a vehicle with family and other stuff packed in it. Snowing, roads are ice covered. Following a empty truck & trailer under a railroad bridge up a hill. It almost does not make it up hill. We follow.
As we go up over the hill towards a big gathering of some sorts. the snow on the road gets worse, the path narrows and comes to high impassible wall right before the turn into the gathering. We back out as the truck ahead of us is also backing towards us back out to the main road again. As we are leaving I notice a very narrow path next to a tree that leads past the mountain of snow into the gathering. One would have to leave their vehicle and all their belongings to go through it.

View shifts back to industrial yard. Starts out fairly sunny out, then slowly begins to darken up to overcast, gray and hazy as the view unfolds as follows. There are problems with the machinery there. Cant find problem, but don't feel as though I really should or need to fix it either. Hard to tell..some sort of apprehension over it. Facing west the path leads out to the edge of the yard towards a green area, a grassy plain of sorts. To the south is a large dark building very tall. I feel indifferent to it and the plains to the west also. To the north is a large run down hotel of sorts . Double floored blocks of rooms in rows east to west with doors on north and south sides both.
Suddenly there is a sense of urgency as droves of people are coming , fleeing from what appears to be dead people walking. Zombies of sorts, but not like you see in the movies. Its like they are alive on the outside but dead inside. They are not trying to eat people, but catch them and turn them into more zombies and carry them off to the south.
The people fleeing these zombies are running over others with their cars and trucks while trying to save themselves. No compassion or consideration for anyone else. It seems as though some of the people are making their way to the edge of the green plains to the west, mainly those being pushed aside by the others with no concern. Those people are heading distinctly south.

View shifts and I am up in and around the motel rooms. There are others up there armed, some outside in groups like squads of military in a defense arrangement. Others hold up in rooms organizing. My view follows searching the room and clearing them of zombies. Then a zombie dressed in a helmet and combat fatigues wearing a generals star grabs me and lifts me off the ground. I am hesitant to kill it for some valid reasoning, but then I drop the thought and see myself as being free of it. At that moment I am also witnessing my person pull a large dagger or short sword and cut into the zombies neck pulling the blade on around and severing its head. Free I move into a room through an open south door.
others are in there with weapons, but the reality is really distorted some how. Some of the dc's are part people and part animated cartoon characters of sorts. I leave that room through a north facing door going by others who are entering rooms to clear them. Somewhere here the dream ends

There was also a brief flash in the middle of all the above of the view of a very large ornate building structure. One with a broad base. The building was vary tall and seems as if round in shape built largely of living wood with stone floors and steps upward in a lavish staircase with linings of gold on the rails going up. All I could see was a quick glimpse of the first and second floors, maybe the third. It was like I was seeing through the wall into the first floor but only in one place. Like my view was being channeled through a pipe or tunnel or something. The second floor and up was hazy and unclear. It was a very quick glimpse and then gone....

When I first woke up I could not seem to remember a lot of this, but as I wrote I began to recall more in vivid detail piece by piece. Also couldn't see at first any real meaning, but the first part with the house structure has a lot of meaning. There is something yet hidden within me I need to find. I need to first frame up a question as to what it is before I can hope to find it. The meaning of the chimney cap is not clear. The glimpse also has meaning in the structure seen relating to myself in a future moment.

The zombie business also has meaning as to the world around us and what is happening..

The snow covered road and path out of the vehicle reminds me of the bibles teaching of a camel going through the eye of a needle. IE as in having to leave your worldly self and concerns to pass through the gate , just as you would if you were a traveler with a camel going to enter a ancient city through a needle gate of a castle to gain entrance. One would have to dismount, and leave the camel outside to get in. This whole dream is worthy of more looking into..

I'll start with the strongest dream fragment. It was a combination of anxiety related to being late for my first class/not having finished the homework on time or not having the appropriate prerequisites. I was moving around Mexico City trying to pay close attention to the time. Kevin was accompanying the family. There was a small section where people in the street were putting on a show for us at least partially trying to impress Kevin. The people were doing strange things like run into a wall repeatedly. Kevin thought the whole thing was too predictable. I asked him to think of the way it made him feel as part of a different art than he's used to. Out of no where, Vanessa showed up with her hair tied back. I hugged her onto the ground paying attention to minor physical tension between us. My mom finally recognized her. I asked if she was putting down roots in Mexico specifically Mexico City. She said that she was indeed, but the phrasing she used convinced my mom that she was pregnant. My mom alluded to this by asking if they needed to contact her parents about the good news.

Strange fragment trying to extract oil from some plants with ben. The idea was to put drops of stevia on our penises and stir the contents haha. Ben noted that the alcohol i had was not actually suitable for our attempt. I was ready to go for sure and sort of waiting on ben. I paid attention to how easily I overcame the shame of having my penis out and about haha.

My dreams were very vivid, but I went to bed at 5 and got up at 9, so there's not much to tell... however, there was one dream that was VERY interesting and, when I woke up, I was frustrated because I wanted to know how it'd end! It was like a film, I wasn't anybody in particular, although sometimes I was more than one person. And here we go:

A girl was at what looked like a college campus. She was sitting at a table and having a drink or something, but then her phone buzzed and there was someone watching her. Not in a creepy way, though. The person just posted somewhere that they had seen her and that she was really beautiful. She was flattered, so she decided to find the person. They had also posted a picture of her, and so many people (it was all very public) started sending her pictures of random people that could be the person she was looking for. It was messy, to be honest, but it all made sense in the dream.

Then, her best friend joined her. She said she was definitely going to help, and they even get another friend of theirs to help out a little. He was not with them, but they were all constantly messaging each other. In the meantime, her friend was going through some relationship drama, cause the guy she was seeing turned out to be a douche or something.

Anyway, then they took the subway, then they went back to the campus, then they were at a warehouse... until the girl found out that her two friends decided that they were in love (the girl who was with her and the guy they were messaging). So they got together during this quest, even though they hadn't seen each other in person. Anyway, that was when they also found out they were from the future. And the past. They actually are the girl's parents, but they don't remember anything because they're from the past, which is why they're her age. So the girl got happy that her parents had gotten together and that they were going to help her find the person who had sent her that message, because they were all sure that person was her soulmate.

The dream ended with the sudden realisation that the person could've been a girl.

I also had another vivid dream, but I can't remember what it was now. I know that I was me and that my mother was there and that, at one point, I was in a bathroom, but that's it.

Okay, I may have had my REAL first lucid.

This was part of a larger dream, but I forget most of the details. The important section was this:

I was with two other people. I think a teenage girl and an older guy (who kinda looked like George Carlin, IIRC). We were going to do some sort of thing to help me get a lucid (how convinient). After I "went to sleep" (it really seemed more like a scene jump), I "started" dreaming and the two of them were standing in front of me. Not-George Carlin starts trying to walk me through everything, but I get a feeling of suspiscion and look around the room, ignoring him. I interrupted him and said, "I think this is a dream." I pinch my nose and breathed successfully a few times. I looked at my hand and it was screwy. The two people looked at each other and Not-George said to me, "Well done." They disappeared and I looked around some more, but the far ends and hallways were being engulfed by darkness, so I started spinning, but to no avail. I think it ended so quickly because I expected it to, which I'll avoid later.

I think this was a true lucid because my actions and feelings felt like I was consciously doing them, though the events before and after still give me doubt.

#266 - WILD - 5:48AM

As I am focusing on WILD I begin to notice that my head feels light and wavy. I make myself spin and I know I am ready. This time I take a chance and open my eyes. It feels real but I am fairly confident that I am seeing the dream version of the bedroom; it's not quite dark enough. I open and close a few times amazed that I am not actually opening my eyes. I try not to mess with this too much and decide to get up. I can hear the fan but the sound is cutting in and out rapidly. It's odd but I try not to pay much attention to it. I try to phase through the door for fun but it move back and jumps around in time with the fan sound. The experience is very trippy but right now it is frustrating. After two or three tries, I lunge for the door knob and manage to get it open.

The house is dark and there is another door in a small room in front of me. I was expecting to be in my own house but this is very different. I pause for a second and then open the door with no trouble. I enter an unfamiliar kitchen with yet another door on the other side. It leads to something like a garage with a window. I notice right away that it is full daytime outside. I pause as I suddenly realize the feeling that I am only wearing underwear. I concentrate for a second, and I now feel fully clothed. I don't bother to visually check it. Feeling better, I look out and see a beautiful, vividly clear, summertime countryside. It's a grassy hill with a large Oak and a cloudless blue sky. I open the window and breath in the fresh country air then push out the screen. The window seems a little small but I tell myself it doesn't matter in a dream. I dive through.

I land on my hands and knees and vividly feel the thick lush grass under me. Some areas look brown but healthy and soft. Immediately, I remember my goal from the last dream and begin searching for a mushroom. Before long I find something with a white stalk and will it be a mushroom. I pluck it. The top is a soft mushy yellow elongated ball. I squeeze it and it feels way too soft. I focus and it looks a little more common. It's not exactly what I was going for, but in dreams every mushroom is magic. I put it in my mouth and chew. The physical sensation is very vivid and the tastes is like sweet butter.

Immediately, I feel like my eye roll back and the dream darkens. I focus to see something and the area in am in turns into something like a colored pencil drawing, then back to darkness. I focus again and I am on my back looking up at the sky. I watch as it turn from a normal light sky color to an unnatural dark blue. Then, the dream fades to black.


I wake up and reach for my DJ and begin to journal but something is wrong. I am completely blind. I suspect that I am still dreaming and put my device next to me. It feel's cold on my skin and I think maybe for a second I am really awake. I do a nose plug and partially blow through. I have failed this RC before so this time I blow with out plugging. Then try it again plugged. It's the same every time. While I am doing this my hear and feel my wife get up to go to the bathroom. I call to her for help but she does not answer. I am paralyzed and blind and hope that she can help my out of it. I yell at her again as I hear her enter the bathroom. There's no answer. Hoping really am dreaming and not just stuck in some strange half dreaming stage, I take my Galaxy Player and throw it in her general direction. I hear it hit the door then crash on the floor. Oops.

I suddenly feel her touch my arm and ask in a strangers high pitched voice, "What's the matter sweetheart." She sounds like she is consoling a child when she ought to be angry. This is not my wife at all.
I say to the woman, "I can't wake up."
She walks away from me and says, "That's because... [GIBBERISH]
"Whaaat?" I ask laughing.
More gibberish. I decide this is stupid and I force myself to move and get up.

I make my way to the backroom trying to think of my next goal. I come a cross my son ridding toy on get on it. I feel really goofy and start singing, "I never woke up. I never woke up. I never woke up cause I took a mushroom." Then I remember Balrog.

Feeling confident, I rush out the back door. The sky is partly cloudy and it seems like early dawn. To the west I see a large moon partially obscured by clouds. Then three other smaller moons scatter around it. The stars were bright and extra large. I decided this was a magical enough area to summon Balrog. I start to shout "YOU SHALL NOT PASS" but realize this is premature. Instead I leap up on the railing of the deck and shout, "BAAAALLLLRRRO..." My shout ends in a choking gasp. I suddenly realize I was trying to actually talk in my physical form. My throat feels tight and I wake up gasping.

Today i dreamt my brother parked the car near the street
with a large uphill. he needed to go there into a apartment.
it was night and he had to pass to the other side of the street, but there
were so many cars, he looked right then left, then he crossed the road.
but he didn't notice his dog. the dog crossed the street, to go to my brother.
i yelled "KODA! CAME HERE THATS DANGEROUS!" i kept calling it
but he was not listening, he came to my side of the street again, then when
he wanted to go to my brother again, a car came and hitted it, he was projected like
10 meters away. I was in shock, and i went to call my brother and tell him that
the dog was run over, we ran and brought him to the car. he was just damaged on his paw.
it was bloody, i don't know why but my brother brought us to intermarche, suppliment store.
i was crying and shocked, and was telling him "What are we doing here? lets bring koda to hospital!"


Dream elements:

-koda
-brother



Technique used: ----------


hours slept: 7 hours

This whole situation with D. is wrecking me up. Hardly sleep at all anymore.
Around 6 am tried a WBTB with following meditation. Couldn't relax then the guy next door gets a delivery (on Sunday morning!!). Had a short dream about my cat dying. He died ten years ago. But last night he died again in my dreams. Maybe I should take a break from everything. It's just too much right now

#265 - WILD - 5:10AM

I have trouble getting back to sleep after my WBTB but this works well for WILD.

Some HI forms into me lucidly organizing random stuff on a table. I was lucid but really into making everything look right. After a moment full lucidity kicks in and I realize the dream is ready for me. This is it. I remember my goal to eat a magic mushroom so I stand up and start to walk out, but the dream doesn't feel stable enough and I can tell from experience that any scene change will kill the dream. I turn and pace the living room for a while. I realize that I don't have to be outside to find a mushroom growing. Anything can happen in my dream. I look down at the floor but only see my bare feet and notice that is the first time if ever seen them in a dream. They seems to be moving really fast and blurry.

The dream begins to fade so I sit back down at the kitchen table and examine more objects. One looks like a tall blue pump spray bottle. Everything is really blurry and I can't make out any other detail. I notice my mom next to me. She seems to be sweeping the floor. With out looking at her I say, "Mom." No answer. "Mom. MOM." Now I am yelling.
"What?" She says.
I ask, "Have you seen my mushroom top?"
Before she answers I have a FA.

I open my eyes and it all feels real. I don't care to DJ just yet and I want to DEILD back in but something strange happens. The lights in the bedroom begin to flicker on and off. I feel afraid and dare not move. The blanket is partially over my face and I can't see who is at the light switch. I yell my wife's name but there's no answer. I try to get up but I feel paralyzed. Now I understand. I say, "This is just SP. It's not even real." Knowing this frees me to move.

When I stand up, it's totally dark. I turn to the light switch but see a shadow cast on the wall in front of me. It looks monstrous and reminds me of the movie, "A Monster In Paris", that we watched yesterday. I am not afraid of it up I want to stabilize the dream. I turn to fight it up the rooms goes dark again. I blindly attack and feel like I am hitting something. I hear an external noise that wakes me up.

1.

Fragments:
Something about Mythbusters with Adam

another of my friends was being tied up naked in a room with a guy in all black with a mask with only a hole for eyes and mouth and nose who was going to rape them. i remember the black leather tight on their skin, constricting the bare flesh. vivid. i couldnt stop it from happening. wasn't very emotional but hyper realistic visual details.

also was semi lucid trying to break through. was flying and knew that it was lucid but kind of didnt cognize it fully

so many other dreams failed to write...too many details to write

Morning of January 12, 2014. Sunday.

Actual image that came up first in accidental image search after this dream (had never seen it before):



I am in a fairly correct dream rendering of the small hallway near the back door and near the bathroom of where we live. It seems to be in early afternoon. Looking out after opening the back door, near the garage, I see what I believe to be a larger bobcat. There is no sense of immediate danger, but I am still a bit wary and inform members of my family. I close the door for a short time, with a vague thought of claws coming from under the door and almost reaching my legs (likely based on a real-life event as a teen where a pet hybrid bobcat violently attacked my leg due to having a scent of another animal on me - I actually stayed in the bathroom with the door closed until my parents got home).

I look out again later, and the bobcat is still sitting there. However, I am distracted by a dark-haired girl walking through the gate, which seems to have been left open. She has no arms (likely a representation of Venus or Aphrodite, relating to the armless statue). I then see that the “bobcat” was only a young domestic grayish tabby cat. This cat seems to belong to her but got away from her recently. She smiles and uses telekinesis to lift the cat into the air and onto her shoulder before leaving our backyard through the side gate of the west fence.

After this, I get a secondary dream (in a different environment but seemingly still in our house somewhere on one level) of a man that seems to represent modern mainstream society - the average person or “normal” human - which I usually go out of my way to avoid. He is a dark-haired man with a mustache and seems to be preparing to do “work” for other people regarding some sort of fraudulent self-help movement mixed in with misconstrued and supposed but fabricated aspects of Eastern religions (much as I have seen a lot of in real life especially since around 1991). I get a very brief but clear audio of what he is thinking, which is “I’m going to sit on a rug and pretend to know things!" It seems sort of comedic but also sad. I also get a vague impression that he is one of the "forty thieves” from “Ali Baba and the Forty Thieves” and resembles the man in the photo I saw after the dream.

This reminds me of a brief scene from a variation of the recent “wayward equations” trend. I am on a flying carpet high in the air with Ian McKellen (much as he appeared in “The Keep” but somehow only around twenty here) and the otherwise beautiful blue sky (with a few white clouds here and there) becomes “dulled down” with somewhat complex but boring art. It is mostly of irritating concentric squares of various boring pale colors (of pale pinks, yellows, and light greens) set out before us. We are both standing with our hands folded in front of us at near belly button level. “Is this Heaven?” I say absentmindedly. “I hope not,” says Ian, “I saw enough of this infuriating pastel Hippie art in Nimbin…”

This first dream was partially linked to the usual day to day (often highly detailed or very unlikely otherwise) visual precognition that has seemed continuously at work since earliest memory (which many other people do not seem to have at all or at least do not talk about - or even believe in - something that has always astounded me and has strongly formed an impression of most of human society being “wrong” - unfortunately I could not help holding this persistent view from a very young age). After getting ready to post this, I accidentally (yes - accidentally) used Google image search instead of the web search solely to check the spelling of “telekinesis”.

The very first image that came up showed a male (though in the dream it was a female) lifting a cat (identical to the one from the dream) with (supposed, but fake and comical) telekinesis near shoulder-level. Nothing new, but often the matching is closer in detail. There have been times when I was able to do this consciously (in meditation) - still holding the theory it has something to do with higher “hidden” levels of fractal continuity that the subconscious somehow calculates and not necessarily paranormal.

As I have said before, this happens with the majority of dreams (depending on the type), but I usually do not include the details, as I feel it subtracts from the more personal nature of the dream itself - and just documenting the dream itself in some cases (with only minor commentary in certain cases) makes the great mystery a little more interesting and “unanswered” for the casual reader - although realistically, I still need to eventually document more personal information and symbolic associations, I suppose. Still, if you looked at an abstract painting, would you want to know exactly why each and every line met and what it represented or just enjoy the painting?

Dream of: 07 January 2014 "Guilt Trip"



honesty is its own reward

I'm in a big dirt-floored arena in what appears to be an amusement park. Hanging from the ceiling are long ropes which people can grab and swing on. High ledges (around five meters off the ground) around the perimeter of the arena can be reached by swinging up to them with a rope. I grab one of the ropes, start swinging around, and soon become quite adept. I swing up to one ledge and sit here for a while. Just as I'm ready to swing off the ledge, I notice that a dark-blue billfold is lying on the ledge. I furtively pick up the billfold, uncertain whether anyone standing down below in the arena sees me. I quickly glance inside the billfold and see that it is filled with bills. I see some tens and twenties, then a couple hundreds, and finally a thousand dollar bill. It looks as if there are even more big bills, although I don't look any further.I quickly stick the billfold in my back left pocket.

While I've been concentrated on the billfold, I've let my rope drop to the ground about five meters below the ledge. I'll either have to have someone throw the rope back up to me or hang-drop to the ground. I decide to hang-drop. I grab hold of the ledge with my hands and drop to the ground.

As soon as I'm on the ground, a thin healthy-looking grey-haired man (perhaps 60 years old) walks up to me and says,"Steve."

Uncertain how this man knows my name, I hear him moan, "I lost my billfold."

Feigning ignorance, I respond, "Oh no!"

He says that everything he had was in the billfold. I wonder if he's telling the truth and I wonder why he was so stupid to carry so much money in the billfold.I ask him if he knows where he lost it. He says no, but he says that he was looking through his billfold when he was up on one of the ledges - implying that he might have left the billfold up there. I suggest that he go back up to the ledge. I have the feeling that he suspects me and I want to get away from him. Then I ask him if he gave the people at the counter his name and information about how to contact him if anyone were to find the billfold. He answers, "No."

When he turns to walk over to the counter, I quickly slip out of the arena and mix in with the huge amusement-park crowd of hundreds of people outside the arena. I remember that I came here with some other people and now I don't know how I will be able to find them in this crowd. I might have to wait until the amusement park is closing and only a few people are left.

I want to look through the billfold to see exactly how much is in it.I start looking for a restroom where I can look through the billfold in private. I'm already feeling guilty for not returning the billfold to the man, but I think I at least deserve a reward for finding the billfold and if I had simply given the billfold back to the man, I probably wouldn't have received anything. I'm thinking I might just take the thousand dollar bill and give back the rest. Or I might just take all the money. I know that I will return the actual billfold and all the other identification and credit cards. I recall how I once lost a billfold and no one returned it. I had always thought that if I found a billfold, I would at least return the identification and anything else which I couldn't use.

I could understand why someone might keep the money, but not everything else.Certainly someone who found a billfold like this wouldn't be able to use the credit cards at an ATM machine because of the cameras. I reflect, however, that someone could put on a mask and use a credit card. If I were to wear a mask at an ATM machine, I would have to be careful about fingerprints since I figure that I'm already a suspect. I doubt, however, that my fingerprints could be traced.

Still, I mostly feel bad now about keeping the billfold. It would have been so simple to have simply given the billfold back to the man when he first approached me. Now I'm on a guilt trip. I don't even know how to contact the man. I could go back to the arena and check to see what telephone number he left there. Or I could simply use the identification inside the billfold to track down the man. I dread returning the billfold to the man face to face because then he will know that I had the billfold when he first approached me and that I was dishonest about not having the billfold.

When I think back on the man when he approached me, I seem to recall that he was smoking a cigarette - all the more reason why I should keep the money because he would just waste it on cigarettes. But then I realize that no one was allowed to smoke inside the arena, so I must be mistaken about that rationalization.

Finally I see a men's restroom which has the word "Soldiers" written in bold letters on the door. I think the restroom must be maintained by the military. As I head for the door, I wonder what word is used for the women's restroom if "soldiers" is used for the men's. I plan to find a stall inside and look through the billfold. I hope the old man hasn't followed me and tries to look over the wall of the stall, but I don't think he's following.

Dream Commentary

Publishing dreams on the internet is a bit like performing before an audience on a high trapeze. I think that the height that one can reach and the complexity of the performance is to some degree a function of honesty. Indeed, truthful dream-publishing is to a large extent a spectacle of the power of honesty.
I can only marvel at the thought of two trapeze artists holding each others hands as they fly through the air.

Dream Journal Home Page