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Normal Dream
Lucid Dream

Night 35

I had a pretty lengthy LD this morning, some parts I can not remember, but I remember most of it.

I. I was at my grandfathers house doing something, and I went to leave, when I walked out the door there were like 10 dogs on his deck. Strange, but I remember going and playing with some of them. I woke up and tried to DEILD. It worked and I was back in the dream in my grandfathers house, but there were other people there that I did not recognize, I was not lucid instantly, but I was thinking about dreaming and next thing I know I was doing a RC and it worked. I remember I tried to float, it kinda worked for a little and I fell back down. I was wearing a sweatshirt, so I took it off and the people where saying things to me, I do not remember exactly what though. So I walked out the front door and to the end of the driveway where there was this tree, I remember the dream was close to fading, and I fell down to my knees and started touching the ground while telling the dream to stabilize, it worked. I almost fell back into a ND when I started walking down the street, I was like "wait, is this an actual dream?" and I did another RC, and it worked again. There was no one around, so I thought I would try to summon once again, I tried the methods that I read about and still I could not get it to work. I remember I was trying as I walked down to a store down the road, and I was like "Alright, this is ridiculous, I am going to get this to work." as I yelled really loud to summon. I said to summon one of the reoccurring DC's in my nightmares, I wanted to confront him. After doing this the dream got really black, it was not fading it was just getting really dark, and a deep voice started talking to me. I knew this was a dream, but I was actually getting scared. I was pleading telling the dream to stop getting dark, it worked, but the voice was angry at me. He started to say things like this, "That does it, you have gone to far this time! Do you really believe you can just do anything you want in here? It does not work that way!". I was asking him what I did wrong and other things, but I wish I remembers all of his replies. I remember just agreeing with him, and then he calmed down and he started telling to do things, and I remember doing them. The dream turned into a hotel room with two beds, and it had a blue suit case in between both of them. The voice was telling me to jump to the suitcase onto the other bed, I was trying but the ceiling was not high enough, so I put my hands on the ceiling and pushed it up higher. This is where the dream ends, it was turning into a FLD at the end there I am sure, I was just doing what the voice told me to do.

1) Me and a group of friends are sent to a beach where we have to perform a mission. When we get to the city everyone there is being checked and we get through there with no problem. Then all of us were on the beach in the evening and our guide told us that the first thing would come naturally when we got there. We pulled out this ring and it started glowing and we realized we had to get to this city across the ocean on an island. One of the girls with me was one that is in a lot of my dreams. I've been watching prison break a lot and just finished the series and this relates to it because in PB they get ordered to do missions a lot.

2) At school and we had a substitute. The sub gave us all vocabulary words to right the definitions down. There was other stuff to do on the sheet which I didn't want to do so I just tried to sleep. That didn't work and then for some reason I was pulling down my pants and looking at my underwear. Nobody cared but the teacher was gone so I hurried and put them back on right before she got in there.

3) Me talking to a kid I don't know well thats in 8th grade. We were talking about basketball.

Nonlucid, Lucid, Partially lucid
April 10, 2012:

I re-enter the dream. Back in my childhood bedroom. I start pushing over rodent cages onto the floor. There are mice and hamsters and maybe guinea pigs.
Then I push through the window, face first, right through the glass and wood frame. Outside, I ask for my dream guide to appear. I see a robot made of a bucket with a face drawn on it. I do not think this is my dream guide.
I get down on my knees and call out for my guide, practically begging.

A humanoid creature appears, hopping down beside me, possibly from a tree. It has a skinny body and long thing limbs and an oval head with no face. It is holding a branch with many smaller branches. There is a small flame on the tip of each twig.
It says something to me that I don't remember. It doesn't seem important. I feel like I am making it say what I want it to say, so I don't feel that it has a consciousness of it's own. Surely not a dream guide. Unless it's appearance is somehow symbolic.

The dream starts off I am in my school church and we are doing our Easter Passion play like we do every year and I am Judas like I was the last time I was in it. After we finished it the first time I was brought to another point of time where we were doing the play for the second time, except this time the church looked nothing like it did before and my religion teacher looks nothing like himself. He didnt even look like a human; there was something about his head being shaped like a balloon. It was much larger than it was the first time with big columns coming down from the ceiling. Instead of acting out the play me and someone else are sitting down listening to someone talk from the front of the church. Me and this person I am sitting next to strike up a conversation, for some reason I saw "Penis" entirely too loud and the entire congregation turns around and my old football coach says some rude remark. At this point I am feeling really embarrassed and I walk out of the church and I go into a side door of the church. From the side door I enter my truck and I immediately drive up to my house. One of the strange things was that my house didn't have any steps. I just drove my truck as close to the door as I could and stepped from my truck to my house door. (I have a very lifted truck and my house is on a brick base so my front door is high up without steps) When I enter my home I notice that my mom, a girl that I am antiquated with, and 2 or 3 other indistinguishable people. The girl was staring at my from the outside of the door. I notice my sister inside the house, but she looks nothing like my sister. She was also way too young to be my sister, i have no younger sisters than me, but somehow in my mind I knew it was my sister. Suddenly my sister and I break out into a Katana sword fight. I throw my sword into some sort of portal that looked like a poster on the wall and my sword disappears. I pull another sword out of no where and I walk up to my sister use one hand to grab her shoulder and the other to drive the sword into her chest.

Meditation to Prime my Mind in order to Lucid Dream....

I used Between Worlds hemi-sync CD.
I sit in the same chair with my feet on the floor. I like to be touching the 'earth' or ground as I meditate.
Hands, palms up, thumbs touching middle finger in order to keep my body connected.

I begin as usual by focusing on the blackness behind my eyes [side note: Recently read CosmicIron's SILD method and it is very similar to the way I meditate.]. I watch the flashing colors as I go into a light trance. I also focus on the music. As I go into a light trance, I lose sense of my body as it becomes very heavy - just like you do before you fall asleep. If I go too far under, my body snaps awake. So, I have to try and hold this in between state of consciousness - not too far that I fall asleep but not too awake that I can't focus.

Today, I got into a light trance surprisingly fast. I didn't expect to go under until a certain point in the music.

The most memorable part - two parts actually - were when my centers just started pulsing. For some reason, I was elated. I thought I'd shut them down. I haven't done this in so long - I thought I'd completely cut myself off. So, to feel them pulse again, it's ... I'm thankful. As my centers pulsed I got this burst from my heart center and then this all over rush. It was like ... :hmm: when you get excited or surprised and you get an adrenalin rush, maybe? It was not orgasmic. It didn't start at my root/base chakra. It came from my heart center and enveloped me. I know for so many this just sounds like rubbish...because I was there once too.

The other memorable part was as this buzzing/adrenalin rush continued to buzz all over my body I felt both my forehead/brow chakra and the crown chakra all beat/pulse. It was not harsh but this consistent beating that just kept an overall buzz in my body - almost like when your limb falls asleep but then finally wakes up and you get this tingling? That's the sensation that occurred throughout my body. As this happened, I imagined/saw my golden form shooting from my crown and upwards, hands together like in prayer, towards the sky. She fought to get out but got stuck at her waist. She struggled but was not released.

What does that mean? How the heck do I know. It may mean nothing. I may mean that I am not fully opened and so she can only be freed when I am able to sustain this energy - which I can and could not. Or it may mean my tummy was really hungry and I needed some food!!

I've always been interested in dreaming, but this is the dream that got me motivated to learn more about it and ultimately led me to discover lucid dreaming. This is also the first dream that K, my only re-occurring non waking life DC, made his first appearance. I'm going to copy paste the dream as I wrote it out and sent to my bff that morning when I woke up. I'm not going to change much, just take out the names and maybe add a couple of notes in italics that I think are relevant or interesting to note. There are also notes I wrote to her in () throughout the dream. The dream is written to her, so there's lots of "you know"s and such, so I apologize in advanced for how hard it will be to read. Still I am afraid of rewriting it and ruining the authenticity of it, as when I recall it in my mind these days I'd usually slightly different from this recount I wrote to her.

The first point I can remember I was playing Mini golf with my dad. (This is something we used to do when I was really little and we'd go to the beach, surprising that it came up in a dream this late in life, lol) So I'm trying to get the ball through a windmill hole. You know the type with the windmill that moves and knocks your ball away from the tunnel to the hole. And my ball is yellow, and as I try to punt it through, it goes JUST inside the windmill and stops and starts rolling backwards b/c it's a slight hill. As it's slowly moving backwards, a blue ball flies by me and hits my ball knocking my ball back into the windmill and the two balls get stuck inside the windmill. I turn around to see whos ball it was b/c I didn't recognize it as my dads, and there's this guy standing there with a smug look on his face and a hat on his head with like crazy fluffy hair. (by crazy fluffy, I meant frizzy... like he had curly hair and had straightened it with a straightening iron... it was straight, but wanted to poof out at the bottoms)And in my dream, I've got memories of the guy so I "know" him. In my dream I remember a bunch of stuff all at once, half the memories are really sweet (like hugging me to make me feel better, and even sleeping next to him) but the other half are pretty arrogant (like he acts like he's better than me whenever he ends up showing that he cares b/c he doesn't want to let on or is embarrassed about it. Not really sure how to explain that so I hope that made sense!) Anyways, I get all huffy b/c he knocked my ball and got it stuck, and I'm all "What are you going here?" and he gets all smug and arrogant and says, "You didn't think you would actually make it in the hole did you? I just saved you the trouble of failing over and over again." I glare and then start to stomp off, and my dad asks me who he is, and I tell him he's just a jerk I know, and the guy makes a sarcastic "I'm hurt" type response and then we walk off. Then the dream kind of fast forwards, I know that we finished up minigolf and then went to the mall to check out a new video store or something, but I don't remember any great details, just that I was still hanging with my dad at this point and that the guy was pretty much leaving me alone. Then in the dream I wanted to go to hot topic or something and my dad was looking at music that I don't listen to, so I told him I was going to go look around and to call me when he was ready to leave. I leave, and get about three stores down and the guy from before is siting on a bench a good couple hundred feet away but where he can see that I left the store, and he gets up and falls in step with me like he belongs there, and at this point in the dream I'm feeling really mixed emotions. Part of me is happy he's there b/c I know I care a lot about him, but half of me is wondering why the heck he is walking beside me and not saying anything smug or arrogant. After passing in front of a couple more stores he stop me and tugs me into a jewelry store. I'm like Wtf? "Why are you dragging me in here?" and he gets all defensive and says something like, "I need a woman's opinion and even if your not very girly your the only female I know here so your going to help me. If you wanted a ring, which one would you like?" So I take the opportunity to try and tease him about having a secret girlfriend and he tells me to shut up and pick something or he's leaving. Happy to be spending time with him, and really anxious and nervous over the girlfriend part, I shut my mouth and start looking. I find one that's got a lot of tiny pretty sparkly white stones in it. Like diamond chips or something, you know the kind of ring that's all silver with tiny little stones barely the size of the of the dot on an i covering the whole thing like glitter. Then I tell him that most girls like diamonds so that ones probably a safe bet, and he puts his hand on my head and ruffles my hair and says, "I didn't ask you what most girls would like stupid, I asked you what you would like." And I get all pissed that he called me stupid and tell him that I wouldn't like jewelry store rings b/c they don't make them small enough for my hands and storm off. After storming off I go to the food court to get something to eat to calm my nerves and kill sometime until dads done. I'm vaguely aware of people behind me waiting in line to order, and just as I go to pay for my food the guy steps forwards like he had been the one behind me waiting in line and pays for my food saying something to the effect of, "I have to pay you for your services, even if you weren't very helpful" which gets me some weird looks from the people in line behind us and the guy behind the register. I thank the man behind the counter, and one again walk off angrily and annoyed (thoughts running through my head like "Why would he buy me lunch for something so trivial? Did he just want to buy me lunch? and if he did, why'd he have to be a jerk about it!") (not to mention making me sound like a prostitute, lol)and I sit down the eat. He pulls the chair across from me out and reaches out and starts eating my fries. I snap at him, "Get your own food!" and he's like, "Well I would have if someone hadn't been pmsing and decided to storm off before I could order!" to wich I reply, "Then you shouldn't have followed me" and he says, "I'm not done with you yet." and he starts in on the fact that I didn't show him which ring I would like, and I told him that I showed him one that most girls would like, and he says the girl it's for isn't like most girls anyway and I should just stop complaining and help him out. Then somehow we get on the topic of recent murders, and then my dad shows up and says we have to go. He had just got a call that he needed to go back to work for some emergency meeting. The guy makes a "tche" sort of noise like he's annoyed and tells me I wasn't any help, and then he turns to my dad and says something about how he shouldn't go to the meeting when hes supposed to be spending time with his daughter. And my dad gets all mad and says he has to work to make a living and the guy needs to mind his own business. Then I start to say good bye to the guy, but instead of saying good bye to me, he tells my dad to go bring the car around that he has to talk to me for a moment and that he didn't want to talk about our sex life in front of my dad. My jaw drops and I'm like, "What the hell are you talking about?!" and my dad gets all mad and tells me that he's bringing the car around but that he's really angry and we were going to talk in the car.

Then, when he leaves, the guy grabs my arm and leads me back to my seat at the table and pulls my arm down to make me sit, then he starts saying that the meeting my dad is going to is dangerous b/c theres a demon demanding sacrificial souls or else it will wipe out entire cities to get them. And that the government is having "emergency meetings" in all of it's contracted companies, and that all the people that come are going to be wiped out by a "gas accident" but that it's really the demon stealing their souls and burning down the building covering its tracks. Then he says that he's came here to defeat the Demon, but that he doesn't know if he's going to make it back or not and since I didn't pick my own ring I'd have to be happy with the one he picks for me. I'm like, WHAT?! Demon? are you crazy, and what the hell is this ring thing about? And he's all, "What do you think it's for stupid? I love you, ok? and if I make it back I want to marry you. And if I don't make it back, I wanted you to have something so you don't forget and think I hated you." and then I'm all like if you love me then why do you act like a jerk, and he says he doesn't know, he just feels uncomfortable when he's romantic in public and hes a jerk when he's uncomfortable so thats why, and then walks off. So then I go out to the parking lot where dads in the car and he tells me that he was nice enough to take me in when C (my hubby) and I split but that having C (my son) and C(my daughter) over every other week is rough enough and he doesn't need anymore screaming brats around and that he's not happy to hear his daughter is already sleeping around. To which I try to clear up the misunderstanding and tell him I'm not but that the guy is just a jerk like that who says shit without thinking just to get his way. Then I ask him not to go to the meeting and he says he has to, and I realize that instead of going home we've gone to a school. I ask why we're there, and he tells me to get out and go inside b/c there's some sort of emergency drill and citizens are supposed to go to shelters and that he has a shelter at work. When I try to protest he tells me to just go inside and wait, the drill would be over in a couple of hours. So I go inside, and your there!!! YAY!!! This is where A comes in and saves the day! I'm really confused at this point, so I start asking you about this "drill" and you don't really know much either, so we decide to go into one of the classrooms to watch the news on the classroom tv screens. When we get into the classroom the ground shakes, and we freak thinking it's an earth quake, but then it stops after only a couple seconds. Inside there are people sitting at desks and standing along the walls and sitting on the floor, pretty much packing the place watching the tv. On the Screen there is this huge red and shadowy person as tall as a tree and they're coming up out of a buss and pounding and grabbing at my dads work building tearing the whole place apart. Everyone in the room is silent, and the tv anchor is saying something about how there were people inside the building and that special forces were trying to contain the situation but no one was really sure what was going on so everyone was urged to stay in a designated shelter where they'd be safest. At that point I realize that the guy before hadn't been full of crap, and that there really was a demon and that he really had gone to fight it. So I break down crying, and you get a few people to move out of desks b/c my dad was in that building and you set me down at one of the desks and try to calm me down. You keep saying he'll be fine, they'll get him out of the building, and everything will be ok. And then the tv news anchor starts saying that a group of civilians have appeared on the scene, then the anchor starts freaking out saying that the civilians are shooting some sort of light from their hands and they're not sure whats going on, but it looks like they're trying to help defeat the monster. At that point I tell you what happened at the mall, and tell you about how even though I know the guys a jerk sometimes, I really did love him and he really was sweet when he wasn't uncomfortable or felt like his manliness was compromised. Then a lady walks into the room asking if I'm in there, and I don't recognize her but you wave and tell her I'm there. She comes over and drops a a present on the desk and tells me that some guy had left it in the office a while ago and said that I would be in one of the rooms and to give it to me. The present is wrapped in wrapping paper, but it's pulled up at the top like a bag. I dunno how to explain it other than imagine if you had a large piece of wrapping paper, and you set something in the middle then pulled all the corners and ends of the paper up to make a bag around the object instead of using tape to tape it. So I reach out and start to touch it, but when I touch it I can feel through the thin paper that it's shaped like a jewelry box. and I pull my hand back and gasp. You take the a little folded note off the ribbon that's holing it closed and read it out loud to me since I'm crying and everything is blurry. The note says, "Sorry I couldn't make it back. You know what this is for." When you finish I am crying so hard that I feel like I have to get way from the room, so I jump up and run out of the room, into the hall and then out of the school. You follow me, telling me to stop that it's dangerous out there, and I tell you that I have to go see him, that I have to see him one more time. I can't let him die without telling him how I feel as well. And you try to reason with me that obviously he knows how I feel or he wouldn't be so certain in the mall earlier or waste money on something so expensive, but I won't listen and just keep running. The school is in a city, so we're running on a sidewalk in between buildings, and the ground keeps shaking b/c we're only a few blocks from the demon that's trying to tear the building down.

Ok, I promise I'm almost done now, lol. But this is also where it gets weirder. This whole dream is super realistic, in the dream I'm feeling everything. I can still remember the uneven surface of the jewelry box like I really touched it even though it was just a dream. At this point in the dream though, I wake up crying. This is at about 9:45 this morning right? Well I'm still caught up in the emotion of the dream and I really want to go back to sleep to see what happens and to see the guy one more time. So I close my eyes and try to go back to sleep. What happens though, is I get stuck in a half awake half asleep state, but it's unlike any I've ever been in before. I'm sill awake and aware of C(my son) and C(my daughter) and their movements and breathing, but I'm also asleep and back into this uber realistic dream. It's like being two people at the same time, only I can feel both the things happening in my dream and my covers on my body in real life, but I can't move my body at all in real life. It's like I'm paralyzed. It really was amazing but scary at the same time b/c I couldn't move!!!

So the dream continues, and we end up at the scene of the battle. There are two girls, and three guys (including THE guy) fighting this demon. Just as we arrive at the scene, THE guy bursts into this beautiful bright white light that completely engulfs the demon and him and it's like an explosion, loud sound and shock wave and everything. We fall to the ground b/c it's shaking and then when everything clears and settles the guy is standing there in the middle of the street were he had just destroyed this demon thing, and he's bleeding from deep cuts along his arms chest and back and he's got no shirt on and his jeans are ripped half up the legs and he has all sorts of dirt and black smudges on him and I rush forwards to him. He look at me, and blinks a couple of times like he's confused, then he's all, "What the hell are you doing here stupid? Your supposed to be safe inside a shelter!" Then he falls to his knees, and I drop to mine and catch him before he can fall face first onto the ground. He reaches around and hugs me (keep in mind I'm still experiencing this half and half state where not only am I feeling this but also my real body wrapped in covers and unable to move) and I'm crying and telling him that I had gotten the gift and that I just couldn't let him die without seeing him again and telling him how I really felt. and he says something about the stupid office lady not supposed to give it to me until nightfall so that if he was going to make it he'd be there when I got it to so I wouldn't freak out.

Then C(my daughter) woke up and started kicking me and I lost the dream, but it took about 15-30 seconds (and several kicks) before I was able to move again. (At the time, my daughter was only a year and a half old, and slept in my bed with me) I had a dream a few months ago (maybe 7 or 8?) that was pretty realistic, I couldn't wake up from, and I was "paralyzed" after waking up for a few seconds, but this is the first time I've ever been conscious of both the dream and my real body and being so aware of how trapped I am. I mean it's one thing to know your dreaming and can't wake yourself up, it's totally different when your aware of your dream and your surroundings but unable to wake up or move or anything on your own. I know it seems similar, but it's much scarier when your aware that things are going on around you and you can't react to them b/c your trapped in this dream and your real body is paralyzed!

Obviously now I know a lot more about sleep paralysis and what I experiencing, but if not for this dream I'd still be clueless and might never had learned about lucid dreaming. K remains my biggest motivator for lucid dreaming. I want to ask him, Why is he the only DC I dream about reoccurringly? Is he a normal DC, or is he a guide, or even another dreamer? Why am I always exhausted after I dream of him as if I didn't get any sleep at all? I could probably fill an entire journal entry with my questions, lol. He's been in several dreams, there was 3 weeks in a row when I saw him every single Monday and Thursday until I had my first lucid. Now, I can't seem to find him when I'm lucid. I've called him in lucids before, but all I can produce of him in those dreams is his voice. As crazy as it sounds, the second dream I ever had of him he tried to make me realize I was dreaming, and that was before I even knew anything about lucid dreaming. I'm pretty sure now that I am able to become lucid every once and a while, he's purposely making me search for him. When I hit this dry spell, he's shown back up again, almost like he's reminding me that I have a purpose, and I can't just give up on lucid dreaming just because I hit a snag. As for his personality, well it hasn't changed much. He still acts pretty aloof in my dreams, though over the last year we've gone from getting frustrated with one another to being happy to see one another. Who am I kidding? I'm always happy to see him But in the begging it seemed like we didn't know quite how to act around one another. Now he keeps his distance and acts at times like he's carrying a chip on his shoulder, but still manages to soften up with me. I no longer get annoyed or mad when he's aloof or distant, I sort of understand that's how he is and I don't think now I'd want him to act any other way. Anyways, if anyone's interested in reading more, SOme entries to check out are:

2/16/12 - Dream Journals - Lucid Dreaming - Dream Views (First Paragraph)

2-20-12 Nap - Dream Journals - Lucid Dreaming - Dream Views (Part Two)

Catching up the last several days! - Dream Journals - Lucid Dreaming - Dream Views (2-23, Dream Two)

2-27-12 - Dream Journals - Lucid Dreaming - Dream Views (Dream Two and Notes)

There are more, but I don't feel like looking them up, lol. These are just the ones I knew the dates for. I doubt anyone's actually read this far, but if you did Thank You for your time! And please feel free to comment, especially if you've got similarly important or unusual dream characters. This whole thing was mostly for my own benefit though. I intend to rededicate myself to trying to become lucid. When my recall stopped being great, I stopped reality checking and haven't had a lucid in a month or so. I figure reminding myself why I'm trying to get lucid is the best way to kick start my motivation

04.13.2012

I love you Mother, Eighty-Two (Non-lucid)

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID

I thought I didn't remember any dreams, but I remember two vivid ones....one kind of scared me, the other was............I don't know.


Dream 1: I love you, mother

My parents came to my apartment, though that really shouldn't be the case, it seems I still went along with the flow.

The apartment is a little weird in its structure. Instead of having my bedroom at the end of the small hallway, there's one on the right side. There was a fairly bigger bed than the one I have in waking life.

It's covered in white sheets, and I believe the bed head and bed ends were composed of metal. The overall color of the bedroom itself had different shades of blue.

My mother comes in, and I'm half-naked from the top, but I still didn't get a good image of my dream body. I'm standing up and watching something from my Zune, and it seems to be some inappropriate things.

I didn't want my mother to see what I had, so I tried tilting it from her view, and the fact that there was lotion to the right of me on top of a drawer chest made things even more awkward.

She told me,

"Let me see what you're watching.."

"No....." I said with an awkward tone.

I think she smiles and leaves the room. I get out of the bedroom as well after a few seconds had passed.

I see my father is going to sit on a white fold-able chair, and he's most likely waiting for my mother so they can leave. I think I see him doing this while peaking out from the bathroom, but I don't know why I would have to hide and try to peek at him.

My mother eventually comes out somewhere, and I said good-bye to them. I shut the door completely, quickly turning the locks to go about doing what I want to do.

I take one or two steps before stopping completely, and then I had thoughts feeling how my mother would feel sad having to leave so quickly for a few moments with her son.

I started to get depressed a little, and then I realized I should quickly open part of the blinds near the entrance of my apartment, and I see my mother is still in the process of leaving.

Before she does, I tell her,

"Mom? Hey Mom?"

She turns around and looks at me.

I declare, "I love you, Mother."

"I love you too," she declared.

I take my hands away from the blinds, and turn around, feeling even more depressed because I only said that to her to make her feel better, and it still left me speculating if I really love her in waking life.

Dream 2: Eighty-Two

I'm inside a building, probably at my University, and I see my current professor for Biology 112. She's wearing a brown shirt, and probably a long black dress with some high heels.

I talk to her about something, but I forget most of them. As the conversation is coming to a close, she declares something about my grade for the class overall.

She tells me,

"You're going to get an 82 in total."

(Something along those lines)...

I'm a little surprised for an exact value that she's giving me, but I take it into consideration, and said good-bye to her while I'm walking my way to another class most likely.

Dream 3: Where's the Hamster?

It seems I'm in a warehouse, and there were some random things that were so unique, that it's kind of difficult to remember all of them.

The warehouse, if you looked above to see the ceiling, it was pure black, and it was kind of spacious too because you can just hear the sound of air moving in and out, kind of like small echos of air that cover a huge surface area.

I remembering holding a small hamster on my hand, or at least seeing one on top of something. I think I grab it and threw it somewhere randomly. Then I started to get worried, and tried to find it.

Its fur was light brown, and its pupils were pure black, with some light glaring on it.

My perspective shifts to where I'm looking at some kind of mini-map, and it's showing locations of where other small hamsters like the one I threw were. The landmarks on the mini-map where kind of confusing.

I believe one was a white castle with pink roofs??? It showed a picture of the hamsters zooming in and out, and had a little alert sound like you would hear from a radar.

(Not the submarine radars that make the deep and slow sound, kind of like a GPS system).

I know someone else was there with me, but I can't remember exactly who. I believe I saw someone in a red outfit, but that's just pushing it before I start becoming too suggestible with the possibilities.

DreamLucidAwake

Training Fury Mode

The earliest thing I can remember is walking around an old tomb with Chris. I really don't know what it was. I was inside a man made tunnel with stone walls. I could tell it was made by an ancient civilization because there were hieroglyphics on pretty much everything. Judging by the different shapes and sizes of the stone ruins, I made an assumption that there used to be a city in the tunnel. I tripped over a large stone platform as I was walking through the rubble and hurt my leg.

"What are we even doing here?" I asked Chris.
"These are the Dreamer Base ruins. The tower should be somewhere nearby." He said.

I then remembered that Chris had told me something similar before. We were looking for something that would be inside an ancient tower. I think I became lucid around this point from hearing "Dreamer Base". It must have triggered me to think about lucid dreaming. I got up off the ground and felt really excited about finding this mystery item. Then a giant green troll monster thing crashed through the wall. Chris pulled out his bow and started shooting at the troll. The arrows were about as effective as tooth picks. For some reason I felt like I was too weak to be able to fight this thing. I decided it would be best to run away from this thing.

It picked up a large brick and threw it towards Chris. I grabbed Chris, opened up a a portal to the void, and jumped in before the brick could hit him. I quickly opened a portal to somewhere near the ruins below us before the troll get in. We both fell through the portal, and as usual I landed on my face. When I got up and looked around, I was in a forest now. Right next to me was Chris and a large stone tower. I knew that whatever I was looking for would be at the top of the tower.

I ran through the entrance and started running up the spiral staircase. Chris followed right behind me. When I reached the top of the stairs, there was a little door on the ceiling. I pushed it open and we climbed onto the roof. The view from up there was pretty amazing. There was a pedestal resting on the center of the roof. I kind of just took a guess on what I needed to do. I pulled a red crystal out of my backpack and placed it on the pedestal. It glowed brightly for a moment and then stopped. Suddenly my energy sense activated and I felt more than just Chris's energy behind me.

I turned around and jumped back, expecting to have to fight something. A large red dragon landed next to Chris and stared at me. I relaxed and dropped my fighting stance because he didn't feel dangerous. He spoke to me, but I can't remember what exactly we talked about at first. I do remember the last half of the conversation though.

"I am here to train you." The dragon said.
"Sorry, but I already know how to use my fire element." I said.
"No, I'm going to teach you about the 'fury mode', as you like to call it."
"Hey! I got an idea! Let's call it the Woosh! Because of the sound it makes when you release it?" Chris said.

Chris left me no choice but to facepalm after hearing that statement. Even the dragon gave Chris a strange look.

"Okay, never mind." Chris said.
"I thought you could only breathe fire." I said to the dragon.
"Yes, but I know how to gather fury energy to make it more powerful." He said.

The dragon stepped back a few feet, preparing to demonstrate. He became very focused and a red energy started to form around him. He focused the energy to his foot and then stamped his foot down on the ground. Hundreds of large and powerful fireballs rose up out of the floor and flew into the sky. The exploded and lit the sky up with a bright red light. After seeing that, it was obvious that he knew a lot about this technique. I was so amazed and ready to learn from him at that point. I stepped back to the other side of the tower and prepared for my training.

"Think of something that angers you while gathering fury energy." The dragon said.

He didn't speak to anymore, but it sort of felt like he was still guiding me through it passively. I thought of something that made me angry, but I can't remember what it was. The idea was to gather energy from my emotions to make myself more powerful. I focused on making my energy spike while trying to become a little angry. My body started glowing with a purple energy that felt warm. I then transformed into my stage 1 dragon form, which is the black dragon I usually transform into. I powered the energy up some more and it grew into a full aura around me. At this point I was trying reach a stage where my fury mode would become more powerful. When my energy spiked again I transformed into my stage 2 dragon form, which is a more powerful white dragon. The aura didn't grow any larger, but it definitely felt far more intense. Eventually I pushed on through to my final stage 3 dragon form, which is a purple dragon. Once again, the fury energy greatly increased in power and intensity.

"Good job. Try to calm down without losing your energy now." He said.

I put my arms down and allowed all of the muscles in my body to relax. I allowed my mind to calm down while at the same time focusing on the energy around me. When I did this, the fury energy hardly lost power and was still flowing through me. I was able to maintain this energy now without my mind filled with anger. It felt pretty amazing having so much power. I walked over to Chris to show him. He waved his hand through the aura and thought it was pretty cool. As we were playing with the aura, I sensed the energies of a group of below in the forest. The three of us walked over to the edge of the tower to take a look.

When I looked down I saw a group of 10 or more men in red robes. From that it became obvious that they were Draflam soldiers. I wasn't sure why they were coming towards the tower though. I think it may have been because they don't like me and want me dead.

"How would you like to use those Draflams as target practice?" The dragon said smiling.
"Sounds like a good idea to me." I said
"This is going to be fun to watch!" Chris said.

I jumped over the tower wall and spread out my wings. I flew down towards the group of Draflams and prepared for a fight. I breathed out that purple energy on a couple of them like my fire breath. They were covered with a purple fire and were soon vaporized. Most of them quickly ran towards the tower, but one tried running away. I grabbed the fleeing Draflam and flew him right into the tower wall. I then flew right back towards the entrance and fired out a ball of fury energy in front of it. A few Draflams got inside the tower, but I blasted away the rest of them. I flew through a hole in the tower and landed on the staircase in front of them. They shot fireballs at me, but I created a shield around me out of fury energy. I then blasted out a wave of energy in front of me and killed the last of the soldiers.

I flew back up to the top of the tower. I deactivated my fury mode and walked over to Chris and the dragon. The congratulated me for completing my training. I think I woke up after this point though.

Taking Out the Trash

This was a very short dream. My mother told me to take a bag of garbage out to the field to burn it. So I carried the bag out to the field. I pulled out a lighter to burn the trash, but it wasn't working. I became lucid at this point for some reason. Probably because being in a field is somewhat of a common dream sign for me. I decided the lighter was useless so I just tossed it over my shoulder. I held my hand out towards the garbage and lit in on fire. Magic makes everything so much easier. I think I was hit by a random car shortly after this. Why must my dreams end in stupid ways like that?

End

This time my 'alarm' (my friend texting me) didn't go off so I didn't get to try to WILD last night so I guess I'll try one more time. I did however have regular dreams. They both very short to my knowledge, the first was of my girlfriend proving to me that she didn't cheat on me (I don't have a girlfriend by the way) and the second was of my brother calling me and telling me that my mechanic gave me three hundred and thirty three dollars for being a loyal customer.

Well, I kind of screwed myself over last night as far as recall goes. I got the kids to bed early and all, but then ended up staying up until 2 am playing that Hakuoki game... I played all the way to the end, and couldn't help tearing up because it was so sweet but so sad! Then of course I had to wait for my brain to settle down before I could fall asleep, and my kids woke up early because they had gotten a good 4 hours head start on sleeping. I usually get around 10 hrs of sleep, last night I got maybe 6? I still have a full dream, and some fragments though so here goes

Dream One: I'm flying through the air with someone. I don't know if I was flying in a plane or just like dream flying myself. We're following what we're calling a plane but looks more like a spaceship (of the nasa variety, not the alien variety) The side parts of the space ship fall off (I know they're supposed to, they're like the boosters to help it out of the atmosphere in real life. Anyways, those parts fall off, and they start spiraling out of control like some kind of missiles. Then, the space ship turns and starts heading towards an airport for a landing. Suddenly I'm worried that those boosters are going to hurt someone, so me and the guy (I'm pretty sure the person with me was male all night, but my memory is fuzzy.) make a big lazy circle, then head down towards the airport to warn everyone about the space ships broken boosters. But, before we can get there, the boosters crash into the building and there's a big explosion. We're blown back by the blast, and then we decide to just go home and check on my family since there's nothing we can do now for the people we wanted to warn. When we get home, my grandma is getting ready for some sort of appointment, and she told us we had a family get together to attend. The person with me and myself go to the family get together. I remember there being snowmen decorations there. The next thing I know, I'm playing Hokuoki and I'm choosing the path I completed last night, but instead of getting a happily ever after ending I get a "They never saw each other again" ending. The first part of the dream was easy to remember because flying was awesome, the end of the dream, no so cool and I barely remember. Thank goodness for my notes!

Dream Two: I'm trying to get somewhere, but I have to follow this stone path that is up high in the air, like on top of aqueducts or something. I reach a point where I can see a city, but the bridge in front of me is made of what I can only describe as ghost stones. You can see them, but you can't touch them and I would fall right through if I tried to walk over them. There's someone with me, maybe the same person from the first dream, I don't know because the dreams were both so hazy. Some guy flies around and then lands beside me. He's cocky and stuck up, but he knows how to fix the bridge. He tells me he'll repair it for me, but he wants something in return but I can't remember what it is now. The person with me doesn't think it's worth it and tells me not to accept his offer, that we will figure something else out. I really need to get on the other side though, and I trust this arrogant guy for some reason, and I agree. He flies up into the air, the quickly flies through the ghost stones, and they glow green for a moment then they solidify. I start across the bridge, and wake up.

Dream Three (Fragment): I'm in a cave like place, and there's a cavern that's blocked off by iron bars like a dungeon cell. There's someone inside the cell, and I want to rescue him. In fact, I'm down right desperate to rescue him. He keeps telling me to go back, escape before I'm caught, and he's nearly in tears trying to get me to leave him, but I refuse. That's all I can really remember. I *THINK* I rescued him, but I don't remember how. I'm pretty sure I remember flying with him around the cave at some point, but maybe I'm just getting the first dream mixed up with this one, lol.

The non-lucid dream involved an old female friend of mine refusing to let me into a house. I guess I had told someone something about a couple who are mutual friends of mine and the DC. My alarm interupted this dream.
I then di a DEILD and soomthly entered the same scene lucid. My snooze on the phone I was using is only 5 minutes, so I had to hurry. I did not have time to stablize or anything, so I just decided to try and resolve the dream scenario. I summoned a gift out of my pocket and explained that what ever I said was an accident, and to please give them this gift. She opened the door and accepted the gift. Then the alarm went off again. Short and boring, but better than nothing. Dur~3 minutes.

1983/82
Non-lucid/partial lucidness Dream
Memorable
Vivid
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After my Grandma passed away, I was very disturbed by her leaving this world. One night, I lay in bed and tried to imagine what she might be feeling - how would it feel to be 'dead'. With these thoughts in my mind, I fell asleep. As the dream began, I found myself swimming. It was probably a typical swimming pool. I tried to come up for air and found a see-through barrier preventing me from getting to the surface. I swam left and right to no avail.

The dream shifted. I believe I became conscious. I wondered how would one feel if they were dead? I began shutting down each of my senses. I figured one wouldn't be able to hear and then I could not hear. One would not be able to see and then I could not see anything but black. One would not be able to feel....and this is where it changed again. I felt cut off and isolated. I was floating (seemingly) in this blackness - all alone - without sight, without hearing, without feeling. I did not exist. No one worried about me. I had no worries but I had no joys either. And then...I became terrified. I wanted to mean something to someone. I wanted to be remembered. I wanted to feel and see and hear. I woke up.

*Afterthought: Looking back on this dream, I often wonder if I had not just gone to the void that I found after years of meditating? To a child, the void might seem terrifying especially if you don't know what it is. But when I found the void as an adult, it was peaceful. And because you are meditating and your focus is internal - not external - I don't hear anything, or feel anything, or think anything. I could have, if I'd wanted to. But the goal was to focus and clear the mind - clear them mind of all that is. Only after clearing the mind can one be able to hear other things and see other things. Before that you only hear what is yours to hear. ... your own noise. And if someone/something else was talking to you, you would never hear them above your own chatter. So, as a child, the void, if that is what I entered, was a nightmare. The unknown can be terrifying...

Meditation: Previous Experience from the years 2006-2009
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I don't know how I became interested in remote viewing, but when I did, I so enjoyed it. It began as a challenge and as a way to expand my own experience/knowledge. I was part of a group that did controlled experiments, so to speak. Just like this group here, so it was nothing formal.

Once I figured out ways to remote view, and trust me, my ways are mine, they do not work for everyone and many will say, that's not how you do it. So be it. I only know what I know.

This session was more of a curiosity tour. After my 'tour' on a UFO in a very lucid dream, many years after, I just couldn't resist spying. I can not recall if this was my 'first' or last time viewing them, I only know it was one of the times I viewed them. What they are - I don't know. Figments of a collective imagination? Alien life forms? Astral forms? Or none of the above...

When I RV'd, I would go in my golden form, looking like a wisp of golden silk. I would fly from my solar plexus area and to my target. I only did this after I had meditated and calmed my mind. Then, I would focus on my target, leave as golden, and see what I could find.

On this expedition, I came to what looked like a red desert. There was an opening to the cave and I went inside. I settled to the ground and began walking of floating. As I moved, I dragged my hand along the wall to my right. It felt sandy and rough, perhaps like sandstone. The cave walls were cool and the inside was very dark. But I kept following the wall.

When the wall ended, or perhaps I got bored and fast traveled, I came upon a room of sorts. It was dimly lit. There were what I can only call beds or gurneys in this room. And several "Grays" were lying around. They did not look like the typical bright-eyed, light skinned beings we see depicted on the cover of novels. These Grays were ashen and frail. Their mouths were mere slits but they had teeth I believe. They appeared in agony. There was so much pain and sadness.

At some point, I was discovered. I don't understand how. I just recall knowing someone other than these frail creatures became aware of me and sent me on my way with one heck of a headache. And yet, I continued to view them. In a way, I felt like I had turned the tables on them. And at points, they did not like it.

I had a dream that I was laying in bed, trying to WILD, and it worked. I watched everything fade to nothing, felt my body go limp, and watched as my mind tried to create a dream. Then I woke up.

April 13, 2012
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Last night, I wrote my affirmation: I remember my dreams vividly and recall them in detail when I wake.

Then, I drew a line beneath the affirmation, read for a while, and before I fell asleep I repeated the affirmation.

It seems I forgot to clue my subconscious in on a few things:

1. I need to actually write the dream down.
2. -or maybe this should be #1 - I need to stay awake long enough to do #1.

*sigh*

I woke several times during the night and I KNOW each time I woke it was because I had a dream. I remembered the dream when I woke .... BUT...I rolled right over and went back to sleep.

Tonight, I will adjust the affirmation to INCLUDE staying awake to record the dream.