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Dream 1:
I was at a Vipassana retreat. It was still first day so I could talk to my friends with me. At one point a teacher came up to me with a bag and his fingger pointed. I knew this meant he was going to cavity search me to make sure I was clean. I was next to my friend Matteo. I let the search begin and it wasnt unpleasant but Matteo was really not excited for his turn so he went to bed while I was getting searched. He didn't know that he was up next surely. At one point it was also like a new house and we were trying to defend ourselves with guns and stuff against other players. It's like it turned into first person PUBG.

Dreams taken from phone memos from today and yesterday. Will try to arrange chronologically and make notes for each day separately.

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7th:

Dream Fragment:

There's a high school context to the dream. Vi from my class back then, he was walking around with me, near my old home. We were headed towards the main square or the subway?

In reality we'd never spoken a lot, but in the dream we were talking non-stop for some reason. I was telling him about a god of war? And about a dark goddess.

Not sure where this fits into the dream but I remember some other part, relating to this goddess. There are strange cliffs, rock looks sedimentary; and there are scattered graves but I don't remember what they look like anymore. I spoke to the dark goddess I think.

Other stuff happens in between and all I have left is a fragment from the end of the dream. I was gigantic and a ten story building was only about ankle height for me. I was running somewhere, taking long strides over cities and hills. I avoided excessively mountainous areas. It was quite sunny and clear.

Some areas were under mass floods, because of the dark goddess? Something about her being angry. There were craters or abysses which the water spiralled into.

Notes:

- The irony of the last part of this dream is that this is one of my current lucid challenges.
- I don't remember what I was wearing, or if I was wearing anything at all in the last part of the dream, but in the early parts of the dream I was wearing my old cream hoodie, except it had a front pocket thing, which it actually doesn't.
- I don't remember actually seeing this goddess in the dream, but I have an archetype appearance in mind visually, where she appears sort of half-naked and has somewhat messy but long black hair. Has red iris eyes.

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8th:

All sort of a continuous dream, but transitions and details are highly fragmented:

Inside some structural complex. My family is here, primarily siblings and parents. I remember L talking and showing me a few things around the place. I think this place was like a house L and S were building?

There's certainly lots of concrete to the structure, and some sort of carpeting thing going on. I remember a diffused sunlight from directly above. At this point I was in a concrete tunnel overhang with huge glass panes to the side. I could feel that the sunlight was coming from a diffusing rectangular skylight much higher up.

Then after seeing into a few different rooms and going a bit dark, there was a transition of some kind.

I was just outside the building I used to live in. It's daytime but not sure what the sky is like. Colours are semi-vivid. H is here in some form and I feel like I'm a small girl or something. I play around the cobbled area and then there's something about money. I was making 100 an hour by just moving some small 1kg bags of flour? But because there was limited demand, then I wasn't needed anymore, which made me disappointed.

Transition or cut.

Short sequence where me and H were about to play some board game. Not sure where we are, but indoors. Then all of a sudden, MB appears. I feel really apprehensive and tense, but oddly enough H is fine with his presence. I remember what I told mom some days ago in waking life, that we don't let MB hang out anymore, and yet here he is.

We play a test round of the board game and then I start putting it all away, in the hope he'll get the hint and go away. I am confused as to why H hasn't told him to go either. I feel on edge and like I could become aggressive.

Transition.

Some weird sort of library. Reality physics mixed with game-type physics. There's a very short farclip plane. H is here and talks to me about something. I remember a purple and orange haze and some bookshelves. I walk around somewhat disorientated. I remember going into a room that I could see clearly and there were rolled up bits of paper, or scrolls?

Transition again.

I was on the computer, looking at a reddit link from some support group forum for people with my illness. The reddit link had an embedded youtube video that had some furry characters on the preview.

The first line I remember either from reddit or the video description was "The inner drunkard voice of the characters we draw ghandara macrophylla". This doesn't fully make sense even in the dream and somehow I also feel the video will likely have someone with a really annoying voice, so I don't think I played it anyway. Passing thoughts about drawing.

Notes:

- I had to look up "ghandara", and the closest word I could find is "gandara", which means wetland(s) in Galician. Though it's a fairly familiar language, I didn't know this word specifically. "macrophylla" I know from plants, meaning large leaves or so. So that would make it "large leafed wetland" or something in a more literal sense, but it still doesn't link directly to the rest of the description text. I think in the dream the "macrophylla" was just a misspelling of "macrophilia" but it still doesn't explain the other random word.
- Perhaps the oddest thing about the video link was that I have neither used reddit nor any online support group for my illness in a long time. The rest of the fragment's context seems to relate more to the fact that I haven't been drawing lately, mostly because of how I've been feeling, but also to the natural feelings of jealousy that seem to crop up in me sometimes when the art of others is on show.
- In the weird haze library area, the purple and orange may have been a bit symbolic, as I associate purple to myself and orange to H, who was also there.
- When MB was playing this board game with us, he was being as irritating as ever, all the more reason I wanted him gone.
- Although I remember S was in the first part of the dream, I don't remember hearing her speak, which seems unlikely. That first part felt like the longest and the second part felt like the shortest.

Morning of March 8, 2020. Sunday.

Dream #: 19,438-01. Reading time: 54 sec.



In my transition from complete lucidity to liminality near the beginning of my dreaming experience, I think about the nature of imaginary physicality, though it does not correlate with the usual falling sensation anticipation.

As the rapid morphing of various random settings slows and stabilizes, I see a variation of the “Gunsmoke” Dodge City set, though its implication is ambiguous, as both people on horses and modern cars are present and in motion. I know that horses are more of an instinctual rendering when imaginary proprioception is an anticipated factor, whereas cars, although still signifying the physical body as sublimated while dreaming, indicate a partial level of cognizance. As a result, my liminal state integrates the ambiguity of both in an atypical form of sleep-wake mediation.

What results, as I am moving into my sleep cycle instead of out of it, is that all the cars unrealistically rotate, reminiscent of a tornado, ballerina’s pirouette, or helicopter rotor system (all of which are variations of mediating this process) as I allow my lucidity to lessen. There is no emotion as only one horse bucks at the impossible scene (only because I briefly anticipate it). The cars do not lift off the ground but rapidly rotate in place until their spinning makes them a seemingly transparent circular anomaly. After a few minutes, I allow the scene to fade.

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Interesting notes:

I didn't remember the earlier dreams at all after a bit, but I had the desire to do so. After falling back to sleep I actually remembered the earlier dreams inside the dream. You can actually recall forgotten dreams inside dreams because it's the same state of mind?



alien school

I was in a school. There was an alien invasion of a sort and most people were unaware that it was happening. Me and my friend snuck out at night to check out somewhere near the park or river and stole something from the alien camp. We went back to school the next day and it seemed like the alien under the guise of the person was aware that we might have been behind whatever but he didn't have solid proof that it was us. We went out that night again to do rest of whatever we had to do to foil their plans.
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bowling
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The search broken time machine

Me and my companion went back in time with some sort of device that looked like a round amulet to go back into time or different worlds. We were back here to look for something or learn about how the world worked back then. We appeared on top of a a grassy hill but noticed that our device ws malfunctioning though. There was a cave nearby and there was some sort of treasure there... But we went to the city after though to maybe look for parts to repair our device. Ended up in a conference room. There was a tall blonde guy with short hair there among other people. A little person came and began asked who stole his thingy. I forgot what he said but it was like a treasure of sorts (related to the cave?) I decided to help the tall guy who stole it. I took a chair and swung it at him and he just dodged it so gracefully. I decided to turn the chair to the other side with the legs in my hand and he ran away.

We ended up somewhere where there was the treasure. There were red lasers there that protected it.
...
cat girl meditate

I was inside the house #34, I forgot what I did early on. I came back and wanted to rest so I'd headed upstairs to the smaller bedroom. I went in and laid down but there was a cat there. I think there were 2 cats, but only 1 of them was on the bed and just kept wanting to snuggle and it rubbed against me. It was pretty cute so I just let it be as I went to sleep and it did appear to fall asleep too.

When I came to I found the kitten snuggle again but it was transforming into a little girl. She went ahead and laid sheepishly down. I decided to get up and sat on the opposite side of the bed by the window I began to meditate there.

I was downstairs after a while and M was there. I forgot what we did but she gave me a mission report.
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Trust issues vampire

I was in the neighborhood of house #25, I went to a neighbhor's house and jack was there. There was a japanese boy there, I forgot his name, he had short hair and bad skin. I found something behind the tv and it was a bottle of pills, Yap told me to do whatever you want. It was like a birthday of a little girl here and everyone was getting into a costume and I was like put into a dress. We were headed elsewhere.

It was a concert and the girl was singing, a mic was given to me and I sang, and I overshadowed her. I got kicked out... lol. I was outside and it was raining, bunch of shady looking people was there and I asked if I could hitch a ride since my wallet and phone was back there. A trio of folks drove me... but I didn't trust them.

I ended up at Z's house and there was a house party inside. I found Z in the kitchen and cooking something. I told him what's up and he was listening and asked me to repeat what I said since it was drowned over by the sound of the pan. A vampire attacked everyone inside the house soon after.
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2 elf girls

There were 2 elves being captured. I think this was the continuation of the cave part from before. I remember there was a dwarf there inside the cave holding unto his treasure