non-lucid

Morning of January 14, 2014. Tuesday.



My wife Zsuzsanna and I are back at the house in Wavell Heights in Brisbane where our two oldest also lived when growing up. The house is similar to the real one when we lived there, but with several minor differences. Most of my dream takes place in the kitchen. Zsuzsanna seems to be making a salad with carrots and lettuce.

We are babysitting the girl of a single mother, although I am unsure if it is “our” house in my dream or if we are supposedly at her house (even though it was ours in reality years ago). After a time, it seems that there is concern about where the girl is that we are supposed to be babysitting and she is nowhere to be seen; nowhere in the house or yard. I think about what we should do, as it seems to be problematic to be babysitting a child who is not even present.

Soon though, the dark-haired girl makes an appearance in the kitchen. When questioned, she says that she had been down by the riverbank with her boyfriend, having taken her bicycle to the location. This seems a bit disrespectful in taking off without saying where she is going. I tell her that if she had vanished, no one would know where to look. I ask her if her mother just lets her go off at random times without any clue as to where she is going and it seems the answer is yes.

“Your mother is a nut job!” I add dramatically. She goes and sits in the corner in the kitchen, to the right of the doorway, to brood. I soon notice that she has numerous tiny white spots on her shirt, seemingly caused by the ever-amusing “healing powder” (over “healing power”) mix-up. Apparently, a packet of maize flour had been thrown at her. The “healing powder” vs. “healing power” blunder always amuses me when it occurs in my dreams (though this only happens when I use “healing power” in lucid auto-scripting and it carries over in a distorted form in non-lucid dreams such as this one).

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It is of no consequence, really. Whether it is “powder” or “power” the overall results are similar enough. It is always maize flour. Even so, there is probably also a “flour girl” and “flower girl” mix-up at some levels.

“It may look like an antibiotic but inside it you have chalk, powder or if you are lucky, you get maize flour or whatever is inside there, decried Prof Rogo.” Sudan: Outdated legislation hindering health programs in Africa by Mena Report.

“I love the flower girl”; a relevant Cowsills lyric. (Zsuzsanna was the flower girl as a child in hippie Nimbin during the Mardi Grass/Aquarius festival, one of hundreds of precise dream clues that led to my real-life discovery of her as my soulmate).

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Aside from the subliminal auto-scripting in this dream that yet again confused “power” with “powder”, the young girl being down by the river with her bicycle is an autosymbolic play on dream state induction itself (as well as a childhood reference to the Dickey Lee song “Patches”). The river signifies spiritual communication as well as dream state initiation, with a younger version of Zsuzsanna, and the bicycle as an element of the physical body, signifying vague awareness of the hypnopompic kick that only truncates some dreams in the first stage of the sleep cycle.

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Journal Entry non-lucid #6 Dream, non-dream (Comments)
Background: I stressed myself with countless reality checks on Sunday, and was a little nervous about my school starting so my dream recall was very blurry and at first I didn't remember anything. I tried many times but it came back to me later on when I wasn't trying. From one detail I worked my way up or backwards. The 1st dream is influenced by a game GTA 5, I don't know about the second. The third, I had a conversation telling my sister not to go to parties.

Dream fragment 1 from 8:30pm-2:30am" Airport ": I was in some sort of airport.

Dream fragment 2 3:30am-5:55am " Neighbors ": I heard my neighbor's alarm going off, so I rush over to see if they were ok. It was broad day light but my neighbors are very old. They are probably both in their 80s and they both have medical problems. Before his wife left to a treatment home, he used to take care of his wife. The guy doesn't have any one to take care of him, his children are not there for him. His wife got diagnosed with some brain disease which I don't know in too much detail but I know that she cannot communicate like she used to, all her words would just come out as loud slurs. I think it also affected her memories. Well I just wanted to set the back story to why it was so emotional. When I ran to their door, I saw them coming behind me, with another women I didn't know. My neighbor's wife was in a wheel chair, in waking life she is not in a wheel chair. I then came to them in relief that they were ok. For some reason I just wanted to hug them. I didn't want to leave that random women out of it, and make her feel left out, so I casually hugged her since she was the closest to me. I then went to hug the mans wife and I looked at her eyes, she was full of joy and she had this sparkle in her eyes. I was also so happy that they were happy. She was a little chubby and didn't look exactly the way in waking world, she is very skinny and look as though she doesn't eat. Her husband on the other hand looked exactly the same. I don't remember hugging him, but I am pretty sure I did. Oh yeah their house was shining white.

Dream fragment 3 3:30am-5:55am " Zefrank and The Singing Animals": Zefrank was in my dream and we were talking about how newer generation of children don't think that they should care for others. Me and Zefrank were next to an ocean. Zefrank started singing about something and it turned into some sort of music video with animals singing. I don't remember the details.


Dream fragment 4 3:30am-5:55am" Family Gathering ": I was inside my house and my whole family came to visit. My house was however bigger than it is in waking life. My uncles were there. I went and greeted everybody except my cousin, LY. I only remember of her being annoying when she was younger so I didn't say hi. She did get older, but I assumed she was the same. Then I asked a guy from my church, where all these books came from and he said it belonged to him. I was amazed and jealous that he has access to a wide variety of books. It was all over the shelves as well.

Dream fragment 5 3:30am-5:55am" Block Party": I was at a block party. I told my sister that parties are useless and a waste of time. Of course she didn't listen to me. After seeing every one dancing and myself not, I said, "what doesn't make sense is that I am in a party". After hearing me question the reality my sister and cousin came to me and they said there is a motorcycle over and I should go play with it. I then went to the motorcycle. It was actually a one wheeler, and it looked very futuristic. I got on it and it could go pretty fast. I went about a block from the block party, but I couldn't control the motorcycle very well. It was slowing down on its own. I then tried to make it go fast yanked back the handle, pushed it forward, nothing. As it was slowing down this guy from the party jumps out and steals the bike from me. Not caring too much about it I let it go and did something else.

I'm standing in front of a row of elevators with reflective gold-colored doors, and in a sort of voiceover I'm hearing what sounds like an article about a scientific study of reflections. There's a lot of information that sounded reasonable at the time but didn't actually translate to waking life - for example, your eyes perceive this angle of motion and expect an impact that never comes, causing tension, and resulting in your attention focusing on this or that minor detail. As I get into the elevator, the article is saying something about there being two different ways to think of reflections which both carry different benefits, and it goes on to explain the two ways. I find this interesting and decide to experiment with switching to the other way of thinking, which is viewing your reflection as a separate person, even expecting it to talk. Acting on the article's advice, I address my reflection on the mirrored elevator wall. My reflection's a great deal taller than me, and completely covered by a hooded cloak. I find I like him - or it - a great deal.

(Woke up. Back to sleep.)

Some vague fragment involving briefly passing through an exhibit to do with planets, and something about Artemis.

There's a woman who's determined to hold onto the hand of some monstrously deformed figure who keeps trying to shy away. She's thinking about how she's been through some kinds of transformations in the past herself, so it takes more than some monstrous appearance to frighten her off. The monstrous one's thinking something about Cain, and something about two angels, one in favor of allowing the other's creations - humans - to develop variations of themselves (which is to say, to have children); the one who created them was opposed; and now he's found his downfall in a relationship with a human, which wouldn't have happened if it hadn't been for that decision, allowing the humans to develop into new variations.

(Woke up. Back to sleep.)

There's a man who's been running through the halls of a house and now reaches a dead end, a study with a portrait, which I briefly thought was a mirror. A man who's been following him at a walking pace comes into the room and starts talking about the portrait, and about the history of the man in the painting, who was - is? - a vampire. He says, "They forgive him the very thing he (something)," and then something about "fell." Meanwhile the man who'd been running is stumbling around the room with his hand over his stomach like he's been injured, saying "Please!" There's a resemblance between him and the portrait.

1. i was in a weird city, somewhere abroad, dont know where. but it was always dark. no sun. And there was war, between some yellow robots and people. when the war outraged i had an eagle vision from the top.. i saw the battlefield. The robots were yellow and dirty, big as scycrapers. but the city had a lot of guardtowers. There was shooting from everywhere. Somehow my eaglevision stopped on the top of one skyscraper, and i was there watching the battle. Humans were shoothing good, but those robots were regenerating because of a small bettlebug next to them. I said shoot the beetle. And they listened. The small beetle transformed in to even bigger robot.. It was as tall as the building i was on. It looked at me and said. "do you want to fly??" I was staring at the robot, and than a woman next to me.. said .. "get ready" and the whole city started to shift. Like it was alive.. Buildings were getting smaller and bigger.. everything changed. the people were transformed into pictures.. and when the city stopped to shift.. all the pictures became people again. Robots were gone.. and mostly people did not recall what has just happened. I went back to my hostel.. and administrator asked me for a name. And i didnt know it. I only knew that my lastname is smith. I couldnt recall my name. And i asked the admin.. if everyday is the same.. and he said yes.

2. I was on the move.. i had to go somewhere with 2 of my friends with my car.. I passed 3 people. .when i was getting to my car. 2 guys and 1 woman. Someone said to me.. be aware of that woman, she is dangerous and evil. Those 2 guys drove away.. and only she was left. I dont know how i got into conversation with her.. but she looked so weird, dead! she was pale as a wall and dressed in black.. and her energy around was like she is dead. She introduce herself.. and i said. No that is not your name.. it cannot be. She said that she is telling the truth. I walk to her table pick some documents up. She tried to stop me.. but she couldnt. THere was some document with her picture. ANd it was true. She was who she said she was. I said. .are you dead? And she said no. But i look like that and i cannot help myself. She showed me the way to my car.. and in between i was telling her about a girl that actually look like her and she is alive. But she is wearing so much makeup that you could tear it off like a wallpaper from her face.. And than we came to the car. It was blocked by other cars.. I coudnt get out. We thought we have find a way but we didnt know how to get to there. it was some black doors leading to freedom. We walked to find a way.. we came into one hotel.. and a guy is running towards me.. and he stoped me. Where are you going he said. I answered i need to find that black door. He laughed and said the first turn left.. between the pillars.. We walked there and that was a hotel room for not rich people. It looked like a hospital.. a really loooong bunk bed.. people were lying next to each other for like 50m.. one next to another.. The floor was wooden, squeakey and it moved up and down. We came to next room which was almost empty.. and it was on the roof of the hotel. we saw the black door leading out.. And a friend said. ok no problem we can get out.. you know how to right? and i was not really sure if i know the way out. I mean.. the path was unlogical. but anyway it was the exit!

In my dream, I stumbled upon a Manga (Japanese comic) store. It gave off a cool feeling, it looked kind of gray with a hint of blue, and had J-pop playing int he background. I saw the clerk staring at me, and he had with an expression like "What are you doing here American?" I didn't pay it much mind and approached him. I told him that I've been reading Manga online and I really wanted to get a collection going. So he goes to the wall and picks a box of a Manga series. It had Anima/Animus character archetypes and I wasn't quite into it and told that I would like something else. Then my dad appeared asking what I was doing and I explained. I then told the clerk that I would like something that is Action/Adventure I talked to my dad some more (I forgot the specifics of our conversation.) And I was presented with a bundle of Manga to start my collection. They were all boxed in/ stacked on each, and wrapped in clear plastic. I saw some Manga I didn't recognize, and saw some I didn't. I thought this was a good way to start me of and payed for it. I was a little shocked because the whole thing cost my $35 and I expected them to be more.

it was thanks giving im pretty sre of it and my grandpa was watching tv inside of a giant microwave. my grandma told me to turn it on reheat but i was hesitatant cuz i didnt want him getting to much radiation.

later there was a great battle involving every pokemon that ever was. the coolest one was Richu caause i rode on his back and he could fuck with gravity. also i was on a golf course with an m16 rifle giving some guy protection

I'm sitting in a hotel restaurant having lunch with my mom. We hear a rumble sound and the walls shake. I look out the window to see big chunks of concrete sidewalk pushed up in the air like a newly forming mountain range. I conclude that water in the ground under the sidewalk has frozen and expanded, pushing the concrete up. Somehow this has knocked the hotel's elevator air filtering system offline. They hire me to design and build a new one that is made from easy to find parts and can be maintained by someone with no experience. Right now they only need one so that people can get down from the many stories above. My friends and I build it inside of an elevator and we ride up and down with it to make sure it continues to work as people move around the floors. One part had to be cast out of metal by my dad, scaled up from a prototype I sent him. I'm worried that this violates the off-the-shelf parts requirement, but I figure the part is painted bright red so no one will notice.

1. [Non-Lucid] [Vivid]
I'm at my old secondary school in the corridor looking in at the lift room through the safety glass, I see an old friend, Laura from College (she notices me and seems pleased to see me, I tried not to acknowledge her for some reason) the lift opens and she doesn't want to enter as she doesn't like being alone.

Now I'm in the lift with 3 others 1 of which is an old teacher of mine, The lift start to ascend and it won't stop it just keeps going, it stops at floor 7 (theirs only 3 floors...) then all of a sudden the lift plummets to the ground {I felt like, just for a second, that I was floating, it was so tranquil, so pleasant}, it hits the ground floor, I was the only survivor out of the 4 of us, the lift then ascends for a 2nd time.


2. [Non-Lucid] [Less-Vivid]
Walking down a corridor, there are doors at the end with a small group of people behind them, I open the door and enter, I then go through a door to my right, it leads to a 2 story tall room with a metal walkway leading around the room to the floor, I skip it by jumping over the railing, I go through a door into the next room, theirs like a dance floor in the middle, i meet a guy and he asks what I got so I showed him this card, It was to buy the game Twisted Metal I think, anyway this made me and him quite happy.

Now I'm freaking out as I noticed I have somehow forgotten my laptop, now I can't Skype my friend and will end up incredibly lonely lol, I then remember I bought my Phone so grabbed it.

I notice a guy sitting at a PC desk with a big black screen.

Side Notes:
Really vivid dreams

Fragment

The king of England sent me $200, A $25 gift card to amazon com, and a collection of postage stamps. I was opening the envelope while standing in the meadow outside of whiterun (skyrim)

Fragment

I found a pen with a laser pointer on the end of it. I wanted to use it to play with my cat.

The Cat Shelter

I was walking near the seamless tubing factory a couple blocks from my subdivision. This young girl approached me and asked me about helping her to start a cat shelter for a group of stray cats that were living next to the factory.
After she tells me that a number of cats emerge out of a segment on concrete pipe sitting on the ground. One of them cats has bright blue fir.
"HOLY CRAP A CAT WITH BRIGHT BLUE FIR! I thought that was only a myth!"
...
"Nope, no reason to reality check. Nothing strange here."
...
"Nah, I don't feel like starting a cat shelter with you."
I wake up.

I lack the recall of the events leading to this moment, but me and a group of people whom I don't recall but one are under attack. A group of hostile "survivors" I guess you could call them are searching for us. Me and a few from our group go and hide in the ruins of a destroyed building. An M1 Abrams tank drives by and soldiers walk by as well. I notice the insignia this group uses and it interests me a little. It's a crescent moon. However, my interests are soon interrupted when I think we are discovered(my recall is a little shaky on this part). Our group has been discovered by the enemy and they are feeding our group to these extremely devilish-like creatures. One is like a large black serpent sort of thing with gnashing teeth. The other is almost like a clam, but the size of a truck with huge eyes and sharp teeth. The creatures are devouring my group, whom for some reason Merle Dixon is a part of. Merle? I thought he died!!!

Well that's beside the point, but anyway this is part of the dream is actually very frightening to me. I don't recall very well, but it was some point in time around this part of the dream in which I realize this is far too out of place and I become lucid. Okay, time to get the hell out of this place! I now fly off until I come to a town where I enter a grocery store. I fly around inside for awhile and I do a reality check because I just feel like doing one even though I'm lucid already. I plug my nose and breathe through it. I do this several times and then look at the backs of my hands. I notice my right ring finger is only half the normal length. I then look at my palms and I see my left hand is shaped the same as my right hand(the fingers are on the same sides). I now move along and land on the ground. I think about what to do and remember I can still do the task of the month. I walk up to the cash register where there's an African-American man who doesn't seem to be enjoying this job too much.
"Excuse me sir," I begin. "What's the meaning of life? Shit...wrong question, disregard that one." "Uh...what is your New Years resolution?" The man now steps out from the counter and begins browsing items near the cash register. He turns to me and answers. I don't recall his answer 100%, so a lot of this is paraphrased.
"There're only two things I try to do," he says. "Radio broadcasts and New Years resolutions, and I a suck at both of them. Though my voice is quite majestic."
He continues rambling on for a few minutes and I'm thinking to myself about how I'm going to recall all of this quote to type it on Dream Views. I soon leave and I end up traveling on a snowy road. It is an unmarked and unplowed road with a frozen lake nearby it. I think about what I should do next, but I soon awake to my dog singing the song of his people downstairs.

Well I just typed this whole thing and it didn’t save right and now I am starting all over. Going to type on word on my computer then copy and paste. Sucky.

Bed: 1115
Supplements: 100mg 5htp, 250 mg Valerian Root
WBTB: 4 am
Supplements: 250 mg Valerian, 4 mg Galantamine, 500 mg Choline, .4mg Melatonin

I was a little restless getting back to sleep but after about 45 minutes was able to.
I woke up about 45 minutes after I fell asleep not thinking I had slept at all except I remember a fairly vivid dream. I recalled a bit and then went back to bed quickly.

Non-Lucid: I was eating with others and an ex-coworker was among them. I was being very quiet and then all of a sudden broke the silence and asked if they still worked there. I had a hard time conveying what I wanted to say during this dream. The words would come out slurred or very quiet and the DCs had a hard time hearing me. The scene turned into an office type area and we continued to chat about work a bit. I left to look for my room since now I was a hotel . I went up a couple of floors since my room was 501 or 50 something. I passed some stairs and saw a couple more people I knew and said something indiscernible to them as well. I was on floor 5 but it was a bunch of offices and this area I wasn’t supposed to be on. Not sure of this transition but I ended up outside by a bay. The weather was grey and wind. There was a large boat and a bunch of shopping carts lined up in the water, they were moving up and down with the waves. I went around the boat to a pier area. I needed to get across the bay but there was a huge line of people to take the transportation boats across. The line was behind and above me on a wooden dock area. I stood there wondering how I could get across, thought of swimming or taking a different boat but could figure nothing out. I woke from this and recalled for a bit then went back to sleep.

Laying in bed with my eyes closed there was a female with their arm over me, not sure who it was at this point. They had their hand on my boy parts and the dream got a little sexual at this point so to keep it PG13 I thought something was a little strange shortly after this and did a RC.

LUCID: I did some stabilization with my hand for a bit then started touching stuff around the room. I rubbed a blanket on the bed which was very fuzzy and really focused everything. I touched the window which was nice and cool. I was in a cabin type room with wood paneling and tall narrow rectangular windows. Instantly I thought of TOTM invisibility and the infamous girl’s locker room. Fortunately there was a school across the street, unfortunately it was an elementary school and that wouldn’t work. I hit the window with my elbow, broke the glass and went through. The school was till across the street, I was in a parking lot/street area with roads/highways above. I noticed many people around and thought about the new years resolution TOTMI yelled focus a couple of times and it seemed to focus a bit more. I saw a police officer about 100 yards away and was going to ask him. I looked down at my clothes and I was wearing a white shirt. I wanted to be in a suit or something nice. I tried a few times to will new clothes but had no success. I got pulled from the dream but was able to DEILD right back to a scene with a smaller boat. I was headed toward the boat to get in but was pulled back out of the dream. DEILD again and very wary of getting pulled out again I didn’t open my eyes and didn’t move. I was in a boat moving along a canal (feeling). There was a lady in the boat talking about mailing a package and she was concerned with the size and the price of the box. The boat stopped and I was out of the boat. I reached out for something to grab and felt something with my left hand, a rough wall, stucco. I opened my eyes and was solid in the dream. We were at a strip mall type place that was outside with grey stucco. I climbed some stairs in front of me and entered some glass doors into the first shop I found. As I entered the shop there was a rack of coats by the door, I touched them to anchor myself further and yelled “focus” again as I turned a corner. I saw 2 guys and a customer (girl from the boat) at the counter. They were all looking at me since I just shouted a moment earlier. I thought of the new years TOTM again and walked up to the guy at the counter behind the register. I asked him “what is your new years resolution” he was very perplexed with this question. After a few seconds of him thinking he said got out …. “To think” and I said sarcastically “you want to think?”, the then said “ well I have an inspection coming up”…. “To pass inspection”. I was good with this answer and then backed up. I had a plan for the opposite TOTM. I stood on my hand (this was not graceful like I imagined, more like a neck handish stand then a full on hand stand). I said “gravity is reversed today”. This was less dramatic than I anticipated as well but they did float up in thie air like they were in space. I flipped back around content with this and as I left I told them “opposite day is later this month”. Outside I looked for somewhere to do invisible task and saw a lady and two kids go into an apartment area. I flew/floated across the street to an area with houses/apartments. I went into a door. The room was bare and dark, marbled grey and black and kinda futuristic looking. There were many doors but all of them were locked but one. I went in the unlocked one and it was a tv room with a couch and a big dark window above the couch. 2 DCs were in there, one was Eddie Murphy and the other was some Arabic guy. I looked down and had a bunch of clothes on. I took a big snow outfit type of clothing off with some difficulty. I grabbed a football with some writing on it off of the entertainment center and began to toss it back and forth and hold it like I was going to throw it. Eddie wasn’t happy with this and he asked me about my broken window. I said that it didn’t matter anymore. I decided I was going to fly up and out the window. I took off and landed on the windowsill. I think I might have had an FA here but not sure. Behind me I knew it was a counseling session for people who thought they were in dreams but weren’t. To be sure I wasn’t crazy I did a RC again… phew still dreaming. I was perched on the window sill and in front of me was a huge pine tree; I thought of crashing through it but decided to focus on TOTM. Across the street were a dirt parking lot and a restaurant there. I flew over and landed in the lot. There were a few RVs in the lot and the restaurant was a seafood restaurant and it was up some stairs and off of a wooden deck. I decided to make myself invisible then. I closed my eyes and thought about brining my hand in front of my face and not being able to see it. I felt I was invisible and my eyes were still closed, right before I opened them again I thought about people who said that they can’t close their eyes when they are in a lucid or they wake up. I thought about me doing it just finds and at that moment woke up.

This was around 7am and I got up and wrote good notes since some of the details from earlier started to fade. I went back to lay down and hadn’t been asleep for but a couple minutes when my daughter got up. Not sure if the supplements did everything or it was a placebo effect. I am going to keep experimenting every few days.

shook hands with my dance instructor James. he told me all about ball room dancing then said they were full. i begged to join. he said fine. then it turns out that everyone in the class was playing dodgeball. i was with matt jajeh and alec eckman. it was a pretty epic game of dodgeball

Journal Entry non-lucid #5 Dream, non-dream (Comments)
Background:

Dream fragment 1 from 8:30pm-1:45am" 2 Split Realities ": I was a spectator in this dream as well. I saw a women talking about an opening for a movie. She looked high class and everybody dressed in suits, and dresses. The women talking about the movie didn't really know what she was talking about, so people tried to ignore her. The main actor, the father, from the movie Taken came out dressed like the 1600s, he said, "listen to thy queen..." while toasting to the crowd with a glass of wine. I saw everybody now dressed like him, but this was not the real perspective, this was the actors perspective. Then my dream showed me another perspective, the real one. He was overly drunk slurring as he talks, leaning on people, and trying to talk to ladies. A mistress in the party, who was in charge of some sort of high and powerful organization put a hit on Ice T, the police put him on their list.

Dream fragment 2 8:30am-1:45am " Friend gets Arrested": I was now with my friend that is a security guard, CN. He asked me if I wanted to join him on his job, I told him yeah and we left. He parked his car and we started having a conversation. I saw these cops pull over and drive off. We didn't think of it as weird since he was a security guard. Then he came back with backup and told him to come outside the car. I was confused, I know that their is a hit on Ice T, but why did they come after my friend. "He is darker than Ice T, he is not black, but he is certainly darker than him" I thought. I couldn't conclude that they are racist since they didn't arrest me. They looked at the back of the trunk, his car was a 4 door family car as well. They ripped off the back bumper. I had to pick it up and put it on the side walk. CT told me, they got nothing on me man don't worry.

Dream fragment 3 8:30pm-1:45am " No Judgment Here": I was waiting with my friend, LS, we were waiting for another friend, BN. He shows up with a child, about 8 years old. We didn't bother asking him if that was his child. All of a sudden a bunch of people showed up and kept asking him to join them, he said," could you guys wait for me I will be back ?". We all said yes, but I became impatient and left. This was because I had to pee in real life to do WBTB and I just couldn't hold it in dream. I left them and I walked away, I ended up in New York for some reason. It was snowing and I just started peeing all over the floor. It was so cold that my pee vaporized. I fell or something and laid on the floor peeing. I finished and got up, this Indian guy shows up and shoots me. I spawned back to life like a game. And shot him, he came back to life as well. I ran to this dark lighted area so that it reduces his accuracy. This train was passing by me. I acted like I got hit. He got on a freight and went to floor and tried to shoot me. I was laughing like a manic. He couldn't kill me. I missed him as well. He jumped to where I was at, and all of a sudden he is Russian, and he ran out of bullets. He asked me in panic how do you reload. I laughed again like a manic, and I grabbed my pistol, I was out of ammo as well. (I don't know how to reload in waking life, but I think it is all the games I played, I did the same sequencing. I just don't know what to call the parts to the gun, but I pulled it, put the ammo in from the bottom and cock it back). I then started shooting directly to his face, he didn't die though. I left him and went somewhere else, Jessica the hot redhead from True Blood apparently ordered female escorts or something, but she felt guilty. They came after my sister, trying to kill her. My sister shook them off her backs, and she was yelling at Jessica. I think my sister asked her why she ordered them, Jessica looked embarrassed and she said, "to have sex with them". I told her it's ok no judgment.

Got up tried to concentrate on my dream, neighbors were having a party and they were playing a loud and annoying song. I had to get up so details escaped me. I used the bathroom after writing down dream. Then I ate some food with my sister. Then read a book, and meditated afterwards for about 10 mins. I woke up and went back to bed a couple of times, while listening to Robert Monroe's hemi-sync.

Dream fragment 4 3am-6am" Dual Personality": I was in a Hollywood studio. This women was playing the part of a girl who had dual personality. After she finished I asked her sister if she had dual personality in real life, she told me yes. I left them because I thought they were crazy. I was now at my middle school. I was on the second floor and my sister was at the stairs and she was trying to fix her backpack. I waited for her. I saw L.J there with other old friends. I went down the stairs, my sister was trying to talk to me about something, but I ignored her. I saw an old friend that was very close to me and he told me that he is upset because I didn't see him or talk to him after we finished school.

Dream fragment 5 3am-6am" Racist White Man": I was in this orange low-rider, and I tried to customize it and they would let me because I was n at the right level. I saw a friend over there in a motorcycle trying to act cool with black shades. I was apparently on vato's territory (from a game). I then drove a way. They were trying to kill me. I saw these grove street gangsters trying to steal cars. I also saw this racist white man pulling a black guy by the afro. He was spewing racist comments. I was angry. When I became angry, I became the white man pulling his hair. I felt the hunger for power, and the satisfaction that he was getting from pulling his hair. To quench his hunger for power he had to hurt and demean others. When I became angry, I reflected the negative angry that he had, and by that reflection became him.

Dream fragment 6 3am-6am" Janitor is the killer": This guy was looking for the killer of his family and, that killer was someone that he knew closely. It was this janitor that he knew. The man had these ugly and un-cared for hair. He had this evil smile on his ugly wrinkled face. The guy though didn't want to believe it and kept saying that he saw the killers face as a child.

Dream fragment 7 3am-6am" Helicopter Fight": I was in this helicopter and it had machine guns. Me and this other guy were in a helicopter war. Shooting at another helicopter. We didn't kill each other, it was all just practice. Then we landed the helicopter and I told them don't worry about the helicopter I will pick it up later. This black guy that looked very familiar laughed at what I said. As we were walking I asked him if he was new to the place. The dream ended without a response.

I had had a massive house party but someone had trashed my house, there was a detective/counsellor (I think hired him, he is a famous actor but I cant remember his name and I was thinking at the time who strange it was that all of a sudden he was a detective) Then as he was asking me questions about what had happened to work out who the culprit was. There was this black guy who I was convinced it was as after the party he looked really shady, but as I remembered more things (which somehow got played out like a flashback) I realised it was actually me that made the massive mess, then somehow I ended up in the same toilet cubicle as the black guy then one thing led to another...

*The actor was Ben Miller

1. debajo de un puente, churubusco pero en un pueblo, veia de lejos un acto político, la entrega de tractores a campesino. me acercaba y había canastas de mimbre y gente sentada bajo el puente. mi hermanita manejaba un auto por una avenida con camellon, se equivocaba de vuelta y le decía que volviéramos.

2. fiesta de una amiga, luces neón, gente borracha. saludaba a mi amiga por su cumpleaños. un salón de fiestas. afuera había una kermés. todo muy colorido. tenía la sensación de que era muy tarde.

3. un gimnasio. usaba unas caminadoras. un grupo de chicas. dormía con tres de ellas en el mismo colchón.