non-lucid

3/1/13 Friday bed time 1:45am - 9am.

Was watching rerun of The Americans. Was suppose to be going till 3:30am. I was contemplating to finish watching it and then start on a work, that just arrived (I work over internet). Decided to go to sleep instead and start work in the morning.

3 long and detailed dreams at 9am.

DR 1
I'm in a larger room with lots of people. Older gentlman tells me he needs to go to Coronado and asks if it's thataway. I tell him no, it's by San Diego. I take him to a large map on the wall. I show him we are here at Fashion Island. He can take a 5 or PCH. It was 2pm and he had enough time to get there by 5pm, when he was suppose to be there. I ask someone to confirm that he will make it on time.

After we are done, I take the map down, fold it, but someone hands it to someone outside of the bus (I'm on a bus now). I tell them no, that's my map and show them my hadwritten notes with pencil on top of the map and I take it back.

DR 2
I'm with a group of friends. They walk away a few feet and start singing a limerick about how stupid google chromebook is, because it's made in China from parts made in CzechoSlovenia. I get pissed at them and complain to someone - you think they are friends but they are not. I thank them for being dicks and insulting my country. (I did research that laptop before bed IWL)

DR 3
This was a first dream, and I remember the least from it.

We are filming and I play a part. We are taking different shots and takes. It's a fun and easygoing athmosphere.

Standing on the road outside my old school, a man stood with a gun pointed to my face. I had friends around me, trying to discourage the man from shooting me. The man tried to keep his self-control, but had to take his rage out on something. He fired two bullets off into the dog by my friend's feet. The friend sunk to her knees to catch the dog before it hit the ground, and started wailing. The man ran off and I swore to take revenge. Next thing I know, I'm stalking him down the street. The man crosses a crosswalk and we end up inside a building formed like a long hallway, but split up in rooms. I catch up to the man and put the gun in his mouth. As I'm about to pull the trigger however, I realize there are a lot of people looking at us. I take the gun out of his mouth and drag him along to find a room rid of people. We pass a group of people who were waiting for something and therefore staring at us. They seemed a year or two younger than me. We get into a room that looks like a theater. I point my gun to his face, ready to blow his head off. A girl behind me grabs my leg with what I can only explain as two long bamboo sticks. Imagine taking a scissor again paper, turning the scissor sideways and trying to cut. It doesn't cut through the paper - it bends the paper. That's what happened to my leg. The girl said that the man was her cousin, and told me to drop the gun. That scissor thing was uncomfortable as hell, so I did what she said. I left the room in shame. A pretty cute-looking blonde girl with freckles from the group of waiting people called me and stroke up a conversation with me. I went over and sat next to her to talk. I noticed a lot of plastic cups and a jug of water on the table in front of us, so I leaned in to grab a cup. I put it down to the table to allow for pouring water in it, but turns out there was water in it, which splashed up everywhere. I burst out laughing when she yelled the Danish equivalent of "you dick!" Still laughing I responded "that was not on purpose."

I was in this room with a bunch of nerds. There were beds, I guess it was their barracks. Then things from halo reach started to appear in my dream. Me and this guy Jordan were actually in the game. We were Spartans. We were dressed up in the armor. Where we were, was the side of a steep hill in the desert. There was this place that led through a canyon. And from that canyon, came some covenant. Me and him blasted through the covenant for fun. The covenant’s plasma guns didn’t penetrate the armor. The wraiths shook us up a little. Then on the other side of this canyon wall, we found a huge city. There was UNSC and covenant warships battling over the city. We progressed along into the suburbs of the city. Then we got to this military base. There was no one there. We both cleared out some rooms, but no covenant were there either. We thought it was a trap. Then I come across the same room in the barracks that I described earlier. I t was dark, and nobody was there. One room in particular I had a eerie feeling about. I opened the door slowly. There was another fully armored Spartan. I almost shot him by accident. So this guy told me his name was Emile S-239. This guy had a skull looking thing on his face. Ok, so then I went into another room, and there was a door. This girl walked by and opened it, and said: “You have 28 days.” The dream then faded. This concludes my dream.

In this dream I was myself and I was in the women's room of my actual work place. I was with a bunch of women whom I had never seen before and one man (in women's room!) whom I had never seen before either.

In my dream I rationalized their presence that they must be new recruits, people who just got hired. And I rationalized the man's presence that he was there to assist a handicapped woman (whom I did not see but just inferred).

Some of them were dressed in formal attire as appropriate for after interview or first day of work. The man was wearing dress shirt and tie. However some of the women were wearing jeans.

So I started to explain that our boss (who was the boss I actually do have in real life, and who actually does have this preference in real life) that our boss prefers more formal dress code such as dress shirt and tie from all employees every workday. Someone asked for clarification: "even for women dress shirt and tie?" Me: "No, but not jeans, more formal than that, nicer." I went on to explain that even though we are an IT shop, but more and more often we do get important visitors, and the place and people thus need to look presentable.

I remember this dream was very vivid, and definitely not remotely lucid. I remember I accepted the rationale for man in the women's room without questioning it, and I was not remotely bothered by his presence there. We were all kind of hanging out there, relaxed, and bonding. My explanations of dress code were received by the others the way they had been intended as friendly advice / tips to new coworkers.

I was at a high class resort of sorts, and I was not me, though I don't have a a good sense of who I was.

The most memorable part of the resort stay was the tutorial they did mostly directed toward men of "How Do You Dance With a Lady" when there is a wine bottle involved. It appeared to be a formal evening dress code event, with classical dancing. So the men were given a multiple choice quizz:

Do you "Dance with a Lady" and a wine bottle
(a) by renaming your wine bottle "lady" and dancing with her
(b) try to pour or drink the wine while simultaneously trying to dance
(c) you enjoy your wine while the lady dances
OR and this was the "correct" answer
(d) you pour the wine for your lady and yourself, you both enjoy it, then put down your glaces, and then you dance together

A later scene at same resort (this one woke me up):

I was sitting on the veranda or a large balcony of the resort, and I was not paying much attention. All of a sudden I hear this terrible looming noise, and a loud voice saying something from a loudspeaker that sounded like "Ally Action" though I could not figure out what they were actually saying. At first someone else blocked my view, but then they moved, and I realized that a helicopter was the source of this noise and loudspeaker too. Then I realize that the helicopter was going to land right where I was sitting/lounging. I moved quickly to avoid being squished. In fact this was so vivid and realistic that upon waking up, I immediately sat up in bed and got out of the way.

This was not a lucid dream but it was vivid and detailed and long with more than one scene.

And upon waking I remembered a previous dream also which I shall record separately.

2/28/13 Thursday

Took naps throughout the day. Tired from being up all night working. Bed time - 7:30pm 1:14am; 3am - 8:45am

DR 1 - 1:14am

I'm looking out a huge window to tha canyon below me. There is no vegetation, because a huge rain storm washed everything away (watche firestorm live on TV IWL - Riverside) But there is all kind of animals on the slope. Sheep, coyotes are stalking them, especially the one sheep that is alone. There is a big black and white shiny animal swimming in a river on the bottom of a canyon. it has markings like a killer whale, but looks like giant river otter. I call others to look at it but lose sight of it as if swims under the low, arched, stoney bridge. When it comes out on the other ends, it's a submarine with crew walking on top of it.

A former classmates stopps by and run off to put on pants. I pick a pair that's too big and while hopping on one foot trying to put the other one in a pant sleeve I tell him while laughing "I have 15 pairs of black pant and I pick this white one, which is the only one too big for me."

We decide to go out for a drink. Turns out, I'm in Hawaii. I look back at the hotel I came out from so I know how it looks so I can find it on my way back. It has a light blue and white logo, kinda like NOAA. It's called O'nus. We walk on a wooden pathway over crystal clear water. i watch seashells and coral and fish. One black mussel swims up and divebombs and eats some small snail.

There is some seaweed and lifeforms on the walkway and I kick them gently back to water.

In front of a small shack on the walkway are 3 little cinnamon kittens in a cage, all wet. And three more in an aquarium with little bit of water on a bottom of it. I yell at the young woman to call someone to take care of the kittens, if she can't. She threatens to call the cops and I tell her I'm staying there until they show up. i see her changing her clothes and running away.

DR 2 - 8:45 am
I work for royal family of England. (Watching movie The Queen durin WBTB IWL)

These were especially nice to have yesterday morning, with the family in the dog house for pissing me off irl. Plus I've been sick, tends to lead to interesting dreams.

I was at an AT&T store looking at one some of the phones, when one of the employees puts a large chocolate brownie on the table in front of me. Then he acted like he didn't do it, which enraged me for some reason. I took the brownie and went outside with the intent of throwing it into the street, when a thought occurred to me: Why don't I cut the brownie in half, and stick one half into each of my shoes! So I did, and the instant I did, it transformed my shoes into these amazing, super-jump trainers! I barely had to jump, and I would leap into the air about 15 feet. Then each time I landed, I would instantly bounce back up. It was kinda hard to control my landings, thought I never fell. Each jump seemed to feed into the next one, and before I knew it I had gone 3 miles in a matter of seconds! I remember thinking that basketball players should wear them. Anyway, I got as far as the Kroger, then I got preoccupied with random crap there and forgot all about my cool new trainers.

Another nonlucid I had started out in the hayloft of a barn. A "man" leaped like some kind of animal into the loft from outside. He was big, naked, somewhat hairy, and looked like a man that had almost finished transitioning from his werewolf form back into a man. I also remember being shocked at how incredibly huge his thing was. We proceeded to have one of the very rare occasions were I have dream sex and DON'T wake up before I finish. It was werey cool (<< see what I did> )

Then as soon as he bounced into my dream, he bounced out. My next adventure was with my friend Nicole's younger autistic brother, Mark. He's 14 and very high functioning. Apparently we were supposed to have a fun day together or whatever. I saw a golfcart at the barn, so I decided to take Mark riding on one. Thought he'd get a kick out of it. Somehow prior, I had bought us chocolate mousse cups from work (chocolate mousse inside edible chocolate cups). Anyway, Mark wanted to take his in the golfcart, so I let him. But he wanted to actually set them in the drink holders. I didn't realize that the holders were basically situated above the motor of the golfcart, so after we rode a while, the chocolate cup part melted, and chocolate mousse went everywhere (Mark doesn't like to be dirty or messy). So he clicked out and had a fit, so I ended the ride and helped him get cleaned up.

True Story: When I told Nicole at work about the dream this morning, she laughed because she said Mark would actually have acted that way irl. Anyway, that's all.

I believe I remembered the dream that I forgot earlier tonight, and I remembered the Significant Insight that I had reached before. This dream is actually about dreaming even though it may not appear to be!

In my dream I was an actress in theatre, just starting out. And an experienced actor had taken my under his wing and was showing me the ropes. During a break in rehearsal I had been chatting with another less experienced actor. My self-appointed mentor saw this, and afterward took me aside and reprimanded me, saying "Why are you wasting your time with that nobody? To succeed in this trade, It matters who your connections are. It matters who you are seen with, and he is not someone you want to be seen with." I rebutted him with "I am not in this for the usual reasons: I am not in it for the money nor for the fame, and I choose who I hang with."

While analyzing this dream after it happened it occurred to me that this dream was about why I am putting this effort into dreaming now, why I want to lucid dream, why I am here at DV:

I am not doing it for the usual reasons. Or maybe these are the usual reasons for some people, who knows. An important motivator for me is to regain my self-dignity and self-respect, to regain control of my dreams so that I do not do what my subconscious tells me to do. I get to choose who I hang with. For me the an important motivator for lucid dreaming this time around is moral reasons: I want to do what I perceive as being right (which of course does not mean I won't do something like shoot someone in a lucid dream because it feels right to do so , I need to do empowers me, and I need to not let those more experienced than me dictate what is right for me. This is what attracts me to DV is because it seems to be a place where people generally support this kind of attitude, and do not try to impose their way on others.

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Friday March 1 2013 I took NyQuil for my cold, and went to bed early. Around 8:30pm I woke up. I remember having some profound insight into my dream recall or something like that. I remember feeling very self-satisfied with my progress and how it was not just a fragment this time. After all this patting myself on the back, I almost fell back asleep without writing anything in my dream journal. I startled myself back awake in order to write it down, and it was all gone, except for this.

I was with my mom. She tells me something about some guy building giant generators and doing things with the earth's gravity that periodically have fluctuations that may reverse gravity or make things fall sideways or in any unusual direction.
So I was just sitting at the breakfast bar and gravity inverts as you would expect after what I was told. I fell onto the ceiling and then back onto the floor.
I suddenly realized how outlandish this was that gravity was altered. BAM get lucid! This is a dream. For some reason I decide to do some flying, but I stink at flying.
I step outside onto the front porch with the expectation that I will rocket into the air, but nothing happens.
Then my mom says that she is going to the gym and starts putting duffel bags into her car. I lose lucidity and decide to go with her. I start packing too, then I wake up.

In my dream, there’s this little bitty town called Lacey Spring Alabama. I was walking down highway 231 with a sawed-off 12-guage shotgun. The town was destroyed. It was just like Fallout 3. It was so similar. It was wasteland. I was headed south from Huntsville Alabama which was only 10 kilometers north. There was a storage warehouse, to my right as I was walking off a hill. I walked about 4 kilometers on this highway to where the road starts to go up a mountain. At the base of this mountain, there was a building to my left. I walked to it to check it out. About 6 people with guns rose to se if I was a zombie. They walked out. I wasn’t a zombie luckily or they would have shot. But they were friendlies. There was a beige Chevrolet that pulled up. There were more people. Then all of a sudden, there were a bunch of zombies that came out from behind the building and attacked. Everybody was shooting. I got in the truck with other people and drove all the way to a place called Redstone arsenal. It was a military installation. There was a space shuttle there. We all got in it and got off the planet and went to Mars. We landed. This concludes my dream.

There was an asylum in my dream. Mom was in there, and had no clue that it was an asylum with zombies in it. I knew i had to go in there and get her out. I did so and
when i went in there, it was old and beat down with a bunch of vines everywhere. I got her and got out. surprisingly, there wasn't hardly any zombies at all. I just heard them in the distance.

Yay, recall is back for now.

Dream 1(Fragment):

I recall something about some sort of game and that i had some problems progressing through some levels. There was base of some sort and also some sand place.

Dream 2(Fragment):

I was playing some Terraria mod that according to comments was made to make game harder. Also it was glitched so post endgame stuff was spawning not only right off the bat, but the hardest biome was apparently right on the starting area.
It looked light-brown and there were huge chunks of ground floating around and attacking player character, they were instakill. Soon i managed to generate world where it was simple enough to escape that biome, but the area next to it was corruption, and it had floating bone constructions/traps that were moving and damaging on touch, also there were huge worms(Bigger than Eater of Worlds!) and bone dragons were spawning there as well.

Dream 3:

I was in some weird house and i was watching some Lets Plays, and there was one of apparently Dota 2(Haven't seen gameplay of it yet IWL, i think it appeared because my friend LV was mentioning it recently), it apparently had absolutely legit modding/cheat engine for some reason that worked on the principle of combinations of secret words, lets player was seeking combinations to get some secret characters.
Suddenly i was now checking that modding/cheat engine by myself. I use option to change sounds but it spits out warning that this feature is unlikely to be usable due to it's complexity, i click to use it anyways and it shows the indescribably huge block of options that can be zoomed in and out, I attempt to figure it out but unsuccessful at it. I close it and just play around with other options.
I was also watching some sort of really old cartoon, but can't recall much of that.
Later on i got annoyed by dad and room became pretty dirty, i left the house. Dream skips.
I was different person now and i was in some sort of group of bandits, we were exploding stuff and searching for something, can't recall much until we were in some abandoned house discussing something about last raid. Shortly some detectives found us and most of bandits were caught, but i managed to escape.

Sleep: 12:00AM
wake: 3:00 AM
Sleep: 6:30 AM
wake: 12:00PM

1. It was a dream about a game similar to call of duty except it involved more tactics. It was a 1 on 1 game and each person set up a team of about 5-6 people who had different guns around a map. There was a moderator who started the game after both people were done, and as well we both had a character in the game, usually behind the rest so our own character was our last resort. The person I was versing and I, we both kept going even and all of our other guys killed each other off so at the end of the game it was always his character verse my character. I think I remember winning.

2. The first part of this dream I remember is Me Adel and Trey going somewhere to eat. Me and Adel used to work at this restaurant called On the Border. He kept suggesting we go to Mcdonalds and I was like what about On the Border and he kept talking about how On the Border was disgusting and I kept saying how can it possibly be more disgusting than Mcdonalds? When we went in of course the furniture and architecture was all messed up and my old coworker Jen was hosting. We always used to do this thing where we would both say Hi back and forth to each other over and over and thats what she did when I walked in the door haha. We sat down at the bar and for some reason I kept saying racist things and I kept saying the word nigger. Then I noticed a black person sitting near me and I stopped talking about it. I looked at the menu and I couldn't recognize anything on there. There was one type of food called "archs" lol. Our friend Maia met us at the bar and she sat away and her and Adel were talking but she kept looking at me. Then I realized she told me to interview at Genghis grill at 4 the next day and I looked at my watch and it was 3:22 and I felt dissapointed because I had almost let her down.

I tried something new last night when as I fell asleep I constantly repeated: "I will remember every detail of my dreams!" while it did not give me total recollection, I do believe it helped. I also started using my dsi as a dream journal, on an app called flipnote studios where you can write. The benefit of this is that I don't need to turn on a light. I remember at least two non-lucid dreams but with much more detail than usual.

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I was in a movie theatre with my cousin/best friend, Davis. I was showing off a curved knife* (that I have IWL) to nearby moviegoers who were surprisingly impressed for some reason. Instead of a movie, random trailers for low budget indie films were being projected. One of these was for a movie called "Warrior" about ninja and samouri working together, and it actually looked pretty cool. This inspired me to use the knife to cut a shuriken out of my coke can. Once I had it I was throwing it at the screen, but it would come back like a boomerang and stick into the (empty) chair next to me every time. Soon an announcer said, "Intermission time! Feel free to utilize the 'napping holes' provided for your convenience." (What.. 0-0)

At this time my cousin and I went for snacks I guess, because We were in a room with a vending machine. it was like those coke machines with the touch screen, but instead it had the choices red, green, and blue. I think it dispensed paint, because the walls were painted with random streaks of paint, and there were a few paintbrushes lying around. Davis pushed one of the buttons and suddenly there was a very large man who was getting angry at us. he was yelling and pointed at the machine. Davis walked out the door and I said, "Fine! I'll deal with this."

The man tried to punch me out with his large round fists, but I kept ducking under his blows. eventually I actually started laughing and (even though he was the one attacking me) told him, "Look, I am not bullying you. if you stop, I will leave you alone." He stopped, and I unselected the color that Davis had pushed and apologized. (at least I think I apologized) This made him happy and the dream faded.

*note: I had been looking at that knife before I went to bed. I actually wondered if I would dream about it

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I was in my room playing my Xbox360 with a Wii remote. Aparrently this was a bad thing to do because when my mom opened my door, I threw it on the floor and grabbed my Xbox controller. Mom came in and sat on my bed and asked me some stuff about video games (very unlike her) and then watched with interest as I played Halo 4. (Again, something she would never do) I also remember something about downloading a "cute" version of a cheap indie game I have.

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Fragment or maybe part of first dream: I am sitting on a fence, looking at a generic back yard. I have my dsi and I am drawing yard decorations on the dsi that are becoming real in the yard.

I was suppose to drop off my brother at school. We ended up at McDonald getting breakfast. We were at the front, my brother asked for a drink, and the cashier started to fill up a big cup of with coke. She then stopped and said he could only get grape soda or something else I forgot, because he's a kid. My brother picked the grape soda, and the cashier pushed the coke to me. I looked up at the menu and there were all kinds of flavored pancakes. It was 7:38 and I urged my brother to hurry up with his choice since we're running late. I really wanted the berry ones. I think we didn't order, we just ran out the store in a hurry. We had only a few minutes till 8. I completely believed that we would make it since the school's like a block behind. My car was missing, and p.w. told me to use her car. I got in the driver's seat, backed out but got back out to ask her to drive instead. I didn't want to crash her car, or get fined for this. She drove, and drove right passed the school. I told her it's ok, and to just stop right now.