All DJ Entries

#283 - WILD - 7:06AM

I wake from a NLD and go into WILD. It's slow coming so I focus to a point outside of my body.
I feel strange but I am not sure if I am dreaming yet or not. I imagine my feet moving to the floor and instantly stand.

I go into the living room and can see pretty well. The house seems dark but the sun is blazing through the blinds. As I go out, I notice my wife sitting quietly on the couch holding my son. We exchange hellos as I pass. Then, I pause at the front door feeling unsure. This dream is really vivid and lifelike. I ask, "So... Am I dreaming?" She replies but I can't quiet hear her and she seems to be changing the subject. I ask again, "Well, am I dreaming? Because, I am about to go outside like this." I assume I am wearing just my underwear but I suddenly feel like I have a blanket wrapped around me.
My wife says, "Yeah. Because, you had to wait 15 years to get a new engagement ring."
I realize is to total non-sense and that her face looks a little shifty and odd. I say, "Yeah, your talking gibberish. I love you, babe." I then continue outside.

The dream become hyper vivid and realistic once I step out. I enjoy and clear and clear my dream sight is as I walk around. I decide to practice my flying and float up off the ground a few feet. It becomes very windy now and I notice how warm and nice the air feels. As I float up, I look past my house and see a section of the old downtown buildings in the distance. I notice how in-focus it is and laugh because downtown is the other way.

I look around the near by houses and hope that my neighbors will see me and be impressed that I can fly. There is no one around so I let it go. I decide I am flying too slow, so I try a huge downward thrust with my arms to propel myself high up. I hear a low booming sound and find that I am lost in a clear blue sky; there is no ground in any direction.

The void over takes me, but I hold on. I imagine myself lowing down to the ground and feeling the impact on my feet. I begin walking back in the direction of my house until I can see it. The house looks different as I find myself walking up the step on to the porch. The front door is a pale pink color with mauve trimming. When I open the front door the house looks like a version of my parents old place. I decide to try my painting again imagine the art supplies are in the closet under the staircase. I think, Ok, now I just need my easel As I reach for the closet door, I wake up.

#282 - DILD - 6:03AM

I have another short LD but I fall back to sleep before I can record it. Unfortunately, I completely forgot it after this dream.

I find myself standing in a very small kitchen deep in thought about the LD I just had. There is an older woman cooking at the stove with her back to me. I realize she is talking to someone. I hear my ex respond. She is standing with her back to a fridge next to me. She says something about how people keep dumping blankets and stuff at her job.

I suddenly remember I am dreaming but feel awkward so I don't move or say anything. Her brother walks up from around the corner and stands on the other side of my ex. He looks at me and seems happy to see me. I am shock about this so I just smile and nod. The thing I notice the most is how clean cut and nicely dressed he looks. His beard is neatly trimmed and he got rid of all that neck hair. We say hi like old friends.

I finally reply to what my ex said about her job, "Yeah. Well, people are bitches." We all laugh and I give a nervous glance to the woman at the stove that I now perceive as their grandmother. My ex says something and I have to ask her to repeat. It was something like, "Yeah, I hear ya."

I begin to feel bored with this scenario so I rebel against the dream. Say to my ex, "You're a fucking whore anyway." I laugh like I am just joking. Her and her brother laugh with me. I start to walk away and see a clean spot on the fridge as I pass. The white empty space reminds me of a canvas and I FINALLY remember my goal. I say, "Oh you know what? I was going to do a painting." I wake.

#281 - WILD - 4:57

I WILD and transition again. The music is back but I am more interested in seeing. The dream is very unstable and I have to crawl in the dark looking at the hardwood floor. I see three women sitting in the floor watching TV. I begin to feel menthol's side effect and reach out to one. I imagine her naked next to me but something doesn't feel right. I reach for a second one and pull her head first toward me. I proceed to throat fuck her. Some embarrassing and odd things happen, then she vanishes, leaving blue rags to clean myself with.

#280 - WILD - 4:45

I WILD after falling a sleep then waking. I feel as if I am falling. There are mild vibes. I transition and start to go into the living room but notice the there is someone in the bathroom. I enter to see small boy brushing his teeth on a step stool at the sink. I ask who he is but he only answers by spitting in the sink. I pick him up and start to carry him out of my house but the more I look at him the more he turns into my son. I stop, "Oh. Ok. Well you go ahead then." I begin to hear some kind of oldies music but ignore it.

I leave the bathroom and make my way into the darkness of the house to head outside. I have some vision trouble and a point where I felt like I was opening my physical eyes but was clearly seeing parts of the living room. I go with it and go out.

I stabilize with my hands as I walk around. The only thing I can see is where the moon light is hitting spots on the ground through the tree limbs. I look up at the moon and I see a hyper detailed, crisply focused full moon. I pause enjoying the visuals as silhouettes of butterflies flutter in place. There is a brief void then, I see birds taking flight from tree branches toward the moon. I wake up unexpectedly.

I was standing on a square, orange-yellow platform. The platform had no depth. It was about 8ft by 8ft. I was standing next to a girl. We were surrounded by dark, vast nothingness. I didn't say anything, but I thought to myself. "I am dreaming." Then I woke up because I got too excited.

#279 - DILD - 4:02AM

I fail a WILD and find myself cleaning an area at work. It's a small desk with a computer and printer. I notice how unbelievable sparse the office space is and worry that it looks like I haven't been working much. I have stray thoughts about lucid dreaming and suddenly realize I was trying to WILD. I laugh when I realize that I must think about this stuff all the time.

I leave the desk and explore this strange version of my workplace. The building is mostly empty and there seems to be no one in sight. I have an overwhelming feeling of loving my job. I feel happy to be at work. I shout out, "Hey! I love it here!" I get the familiar feeling of how odd it is to be yelling while I'm asleep.

I see L sitting at a low table. I have issues with him in waking life and my first instinct was to punch him in the face. I remember that I have been thinking and tentatively practicing loving kindness in waking life, so I stop myself. I decide to project loving kindness to ward him but I over do it. I tackle him in a hug and tell him that I love him. I tell him he is really a good guy and I begin to really believe it. I think maybe I just misunderstand him. The dream destabilizes and I have a FA.

I try to DJ the dream but I can't see the screen. I think I must have my dimmer all the way and I try to guess at the app controls hoping to turn it up. Suddenly, I feel very tired and sluggish. I collapse over to my side. I hear the dog in the master bathroom and know that she is never in there. I realize I must still be dreaming. Then I hear my younger daughter calling for me and my son beginning to cry. I keep telling myself this is all fake but I can't seem to move. My wife touches me and asks me if I am ok. I wake up.

#278 - DILD

This one was Friday night after a WILD attempt.

I am stretching and preparing to run a race on a track in the summer Olympics. I worry that there will be no way I can compete with these guys. I decide that I should do a short warm up run and notice how easy it is. I become lucid and start running the race the actual race and enjoy the feel of running painlessly. I easily get ahead of everyone and turn around backwards still running. I laugh at how far back the are already. I decide to put in it in high speed and nearly lap everyone. I feel disappointed at how easy it was. I wake up.

I was not in this dream. It was like I was watching in movie, and my vision was in the scene, but I personally was not in this dream. No idea if that has a word or whatnot, but moving on.

It took place when there was severe segregation between white and black people. My view was of a bus that had stopped at a "black-only" stop. There were many people on the sidewalk outside of the bus. There was a commotion at the bus stop about a higher-up, white army man making an appointment to take that bus. No one wanted him to, but apparently he really wanted to. A larger, older (mid-50's), bald white man arrived at the stop. He took his coat off revealing countless badges he's earned in war. At first the driver wouldn't let him in the bus, but then he announced his title and name. I don't know exactly what it was, but it sounded profoundly respectful, and he was immediately let in. My view changed to the back of the bus. It was jam-packed, but silent as he made his way to the only open spot in the back. After he sat down, he asked the lady in front of him how she was doing but she ignored him. To the lack of her response he said, "oh, you're not doing. Okay, then." And then she snapped around and laughed. There was a teenage boy sitting in front of that lady who showed him a credit card that was on a lanyard tied around his neck. "See, this is my name!" the boy yelled. A man sitting across the isle from the army man pulled out his wallet and presented his ID. Soon everyone on the bus was yelling at the man showing him nametags, IDs, and credit cards to prove their names. It seemed spiteful, but it also seemed like they were all afraid of something. Then the army man yelled. Nothing specifically, he just yelled. It was silent. Then he pointed at the badges on his chest. "These aren't here to show I want to take your identity or arrest you. These are here because I've earned them from fighting in wars for our freedom. They're here to show I'll fight for you, and everyone around you." Everyone sat back down, the army man stood up and said "I have to go." He walked off the bus and the dream ended.

Journal Entry Lucid #9 Dream,Lucid, Comments)
Background: I woke up around 2:00 Am, which was about 5-6 hrs after I went to sleep. I stayed up and I watched some inspirational videos about success and possibility. Then I read Stephan LaBerge's book, I left the computer about 1:20 min later. I went to kitchen to make me some food because I felt hungry, made myself some oatmeal. I don't think the food matters though. I went to my room at around 3:38 am. I listened to Robert Monroe's intro to focus 10. I stayed up for nearly 100% of it. If I did lose consciousness for a second but when I did I regain it by willpower. After doing all the exercises around the end, he mentioned that I have the power to remember anything that I wanted to by touching my head with the tip of my hand and telling myself to remember, so I told myself to remember LD. (*I believed what he said to near 100% certainty but if it failed it was because I touched my head with my hand and I don't know if that is what he meant or if he wanted me to imagine). After 30 min of the audio, I turned over and found a comfortable position to go to sleep. As I was getting sleepy I reminded myself to realize that I am dreaming. I said those famous phrase, "next time I'm dreaming I will realize that I am dreaming". I said this repeatedly and I fell asleep sometime soon. I also heard my moms voice which influenced my dream tremendously.

Dream fragment 1 from 8:20pm-2:30am"":I found myself watching my gaming avatar on YouTube. It looked and felt real but at same time surreal. I got tired of watching the car chase, so I got up out of the computer and went to the living room. I hugged my grandmother and father because I thought I didn't see them in a while. I asked them where my mother was. They didn't want to respond for some reason. I thought I know I heard her voice. I asked, "is she sleeping? did she just sleep right now? I haven't seen her all day." My dad looked at me mad, and said don't disturb her. It was early in the night around 9:00pm. Me and my father were outside in the backyard. My mother walks out and started telling us her interesting dream.

She said, "I saw my own brain, literally! I turned over in the dream and saw my brain". I thought that sounds like O.B.E. I told her what if that wasn't a dream and that was real? As we were going back inside the house, my dad said she needs a way to go back to sleep. I don't know what I said, but my father responded angrily, "pssh dream! Dream is nothing". I told myself in the dream I am the only one that walks this path, I am only doing this for myself. I was in the computer room and my mother brought some tea and she asked me which one will make her go to sleep. I said, "I thought you are going to work isn't it early in the morning". I thought this doesn't make any sense why am I doing this looking at the tea bags in my hand. My mother disappeared. I said I better not be dreaming about something this boring. I looked at the time on my computer screen it read at first "9:40 AM.B" then a second glance "9:49 Am" then again "9:50 Am". It was also hard to focus on the numbers. I thought about the time "am" but it was still pitch dark outside.

I realized I was dreaming. I started rubbing my hands right away. I started becoming very excited because it was such a consistent, realistic and not to mention ordinary dream, but I logically became lucid. I tried to spin around to stabilize my dream. The spinning made me very nauseous. It felt like I was shrinking at the same time. It felt harder to breath as well. It felt so horrible that I decided to wake up. As soon as I decided to do that I woke up, with the last thing I saw my grandmothers' bed. I did a RC after awakening and about to write my LD.

02/16/14***
Quick entries...at least for now.
Had a good vivid dream featuring my son about 12 years younger than now. So cute!

Had all 3 LDs late in the morning after getting over the hump of short dreamlets and mostly dreamless period where my awareness usually starts to wane.

Felt like a breakthrough on a new WILD technique for me. Similar to a few things I have tried before but with the addition of a kind of self hypnosis to put me in a relaxed but aware state. I was basically interacting with both HHs and actual stimuli. My wife moving around in bed I turned into Girl Friday getting into bed. That turned into the first lucid where I was in a bathtub with her we were both naked and I was feeling all over her and we were having intercourse I changed positions to pull her right leg over my left leg. She seemed to get smaller and her face became distorted as I focused on it. I continued kissing her though as we had sex.

Second LD, DILD inside sports arena getting ready to play. Red John is on our team this time...unusual. I am late and they are starting to play and I think about going out there without all of my equipment and then I realize I am dreaming I can just go without or...and I end up just putting everything on instantly. Our team scores as I'm coming out on the field and I decide to fly up for some celebratory sex with a woman in the stands. I think this is fun! Next I will go out there and score fantastically and I do; it is so much fun! I fly back up into the stands and look for my type. She is sitting in a skirt with nothing on underneath and we immediately go at it! Fade back to bed.

A bit later I have cool false awakening turned DILD where I am in a bedroom/office and I complete one last task and I look at the time and realized that I worked 38 minutes longer than I intended to. I turn around and the sun is shining blindingly through the window and I realize I am dreaming. The sun feels so vibrant on my skin but the light is a little too bright. I inch my way towards a bed just out of reach of the sun's glare and I restore my bearings. I turn around and there is another bed where the workstation just was. I look closely and see two feet overlapping each other but no one attached to them...at the head of the bed by the pillows! I find this cool instead of creepy and remove pillows to examine further. I touch the feet and they feel like feet, neither warm nor cool to the touch, maybe a little rubbery. I fade back to bed.

I was in a single room airport. It was a very large room... I'd say as big as a small, school gym. The carpet was multicolored between blue, purple, red, and green swirls. They weren't very big swirls, but they differed in size. There were no uniform patterns of them. There were two rows of three chairs in the middle of the room. They were all red. I was waiting for my girlfriend to get there (she's an ex in real life) so we could go home. I was carrying a pink luggage bag and had a pink backpack on my back. I started to walk towards the entrance/exit and a Japanese woman and her daughter came into the airport. The little girl spoke Japanese to me and I was going to respond with "I don't know Japanese" in Japanese (I do know a little IRL), but then it sounded like she started to talk Vietnamese. I don't know any, so I kinda just brushed it off. Then my girlfriend got there. I told her that I got her awesome pink luggage stuff and she didn't like it at all. Then I took the backpack off and took a Gameboy out. It had her favorite Pokemon game in it, which is weird 'cause she didn't like Pokemon in real life too much. Then I briefly woke up, and fell into a different dream.

A scene ended with me getting into a car and driving away. While I'm driving, however, something goes wrong, I keep weaving into the other lane, and I wind up getting pulled over by a cop. I'm thinking, good thing this is just a dream. And I'd rather not stick around for this, so I go incorporeal and float through the roof, invisible. I look down at the cop being surprised by the car without a driver, and then I decide to bring the car with me: I turn it into water droplets, which collect in the palm of my hand.

There's a memory gap, but I doubt the semi-lucidity lasted long after that. Next scene I remember clearly is non-lucid: a woman is consulting a witch, asking her to do a spell or divination for her. When it's over, the witch asks the woman what that looked like from her end - meaning that during the course of the spell, the witch realized this woman's got some magic of her own. And the god this witch works for may or may not have an interest in this woman. The witch asks her a question, about why she's trying to (do something) when she's got too much on her plate already. The woman explains: there's a guy who loves her "pretty bad" - no mention of whether it's reciprocated - and she "can't hear him anymore," by which she means hear him in her head - it's a vampire thing - and she's worried about him.

(Woke up. Back to sleep.)

I'm temporarily working for a doctor with a small private practice, I'm in training. The doctor's showing me a patient's chart and is asking me if anything jumps out at me - I say the patient's lost 10 pounds, but I'm thinking, that could just be a diet. The doctor points out what she wanted me to see: this patient's been suffering from hallucinations, describing strange sights and sounds. But she lives in the city, and there are all sorts of strange things there; and on the date that she experienced these 'strange sights and sounds,' there was a parade. I'm doubtful. I say, "I don't know, it's pretty difficult to confuse a parade with a hallucination." The doctor admits this is true.

There was a scene where I went to talk with that patient, and by the end of that scene we've wound up talking casually in the waiting room, she's very pretty and very easy to talk to. Then a baby belonging to one of the other patients crawls up into her lap. It's got a dripping diaper. This eventually leads to an unpleasant confrontation with the mother, who denied that the baby was the cause of the mess; the mother becomes so outraged that she takes out a gun, points it at the ceiling and shoots.

I grab the woman's arm holding the gun. The other patients in the waiting room all run out the door, except the one I'd been talking to. I get the gun away from her before she can fire the other bullet - it's a two shot derringer - and I hand it to the other patient. As I do so I say something along the lines of "Hold this for me, honey." Then I think, wait a minute, she was my patient a minute ago, that's very unprofessional, I can't go around changing a DC's relationship to me mid-storyline just because we shared a nice conversation and a life-or-death situation. The woman has pulled out another gun, and I take it away from her and hand it to the patient again - there wind up being 4 guns total.

My memory of this dreams starts off with me in a car following someone.
Cars in this dream all looked like this except, they were all mainly red with yellow outlining.

Also, all cars had to be on railing. It was like roller coaster railing, but wider, and embedded into the ground. Anyhow, I was driving somewhere at night when suddenly the car in front of me drove off a cliff. I turned to the side because I noticed that the tracks that were supposed to lead to the other side of the drop off weren't there... if you've ever played Donkey Kong Country, it looked like the broken tracks in the mine-cart level. There were a lot of people who pulled off to the side because they ran into the same problem. I don't know why or what it was about, but there was a riddle we had to solve. Somehow, the guy who ran his car off the cliff was there helping out. It didn't make sense to me that he was there 'cause he ran his car off a cliff, but he said "something like that wouldn't really happen." It didn't occur to me to try an RC, but oh well. Anyhoo, he solved the riddle. I don't know what the riddle was, but the answer had to do with which chicken to press down on a control pad. More on that soon. The railing to cross the drop off was back up, but instead of it being a straight shot to the other side, there was a major drop like a roller coaster. It was a giant U shape. So, the guy who solved it went first. I was able to see what he was seeing in first person. When he went down the drop, it felt like a real roller coaster. Then I saw him hit a gate at the top of the other side after he leveled out on the surface, but it wasn't hard impact; it just stopped him with no harsh stopping feeling at all. There was a really large guy standing by the gate with a thick beard. He got out and reached towards the bottom of the gate and there was a four piece... thing. Like, imagine the gas pedal in a go cart. There were four of them and they made a square. There was a small chicken sticker on each of them and he pressed the bottom left one. The large man nodded and smiled and the gate opened. Now it was my turn. I did everything I just saw through the first guy's perspective and got through. This is where another dream starts in an airport.

Journal Entry non-lucid #36 Dream, non-dream (Comments)
Background: I meditated before going to bed and told myself that I want to remember my dreams. I heard Robert Monroe's intro to focus 10 audio but I fell asleep before finishing it.

Dream fragment 1, 8:51pm-1:57am."": I think I saw a person or an ad that said to me, "if you ate a turkey as a child you are a Canadian but if you ate a chicken you are a true American". I thought what if you had both. I couldn't stop thinking about food so I went to my fridge. I made myself some sandwitch. My dad showed up and he was trying to take out the powdered doughnut. He sprikled it all over the kitchen. It was all over the drawers. I took some cookies and tried to slip through my grandmother, who decided to walk right in between me and my dad. My dad stopped me and told me I had to put the milk away.

2.16.14 Sunday

last night 11p-5am

Another short night.

Again, I knew I had some long dreams, and I could almost recall it. So close, yet so far : (