• Lucid Dreaming - Dream Views




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    1. Finally back to journaling, starting off with: Strange magic dragon dream | [17.03.2022]

      by , 03-18-2022 at 01:49 AM (Draeger's Dream Journal and Documentation)
      Strange magic dragon dream
      I am at building C of my school, on the second floor (entering from the yard, you basically have 4 important doors on the bottom floor. Two on either side, which lead to a staircase leading up all the way to the third floor, with every second platform, occurring after every second unit of stairs, leading to the corresponding floor. In front and behind you, you have exits, the former leading directly to the street and the latter to the school yard. To your left, you have a freestanding stairway, leading up to a platform, whose shape can be imagined as a rectangle without the bottom edge showing the path you can walk along, the path fitting to the wall. From there, multiple rooms can be accessed and also two doors leading to the left and right staircases to the other floors). There, I apparently have a kind of private lesson with a teacher I actually do not particularly like, but, apparently he wants to teach me, and a small group of other people who want this, how to become a dragon and I guess to harness that kind of magic(? not sure about the magic part. might have had to do with fire). Thus, I enter the class. I was excited, but had a kind of feeling in me that this would be too good to be true. Though, then, after a while, it did kind of work and I guess I transformed into some kind of humanoid dragon form. I felt a great amount of the feeling of freedom and also a kind of wildness along with this. I remember knowing that this would just be a small taste and that there was more potential in this ability. At this point, I guess I had remembered others and also myself couldn't see this happen (despite us having seen it before; it was kind of contradictory, even the moment this came up) and I thought that this would just be too good to be true and that I was stuck in wishful thinking again. The teacher wanted us to try flying, but I thought that was kind of stupid, considering the fact that apparently the bell had rung and everyone was moving to their other classes, so everyone would just think we're crazy and other teachers would get angry at us, so I just waited, despite my anxiety, as I knew the teacher was impatient, but that was just way too stupid of an idea to me. So, eventually, everyone had seemingly moved and I felt like nobody was going to see this, so, after watching some of the others in my group managing to lift off and fly around, I tried flapping my arms (despite me knowing that we were doing this because apparently we had learned to develop our wings enough), and, as I failed to lift off, I felt like my worries were confirmed and was discouraged, but did not have the plan to give up. I subsequently woke up.



      Finally started journaling again. There has just been a lot of stressful stuff going on in my life, which has prevented me from continuing this for quite a while.

      I actually only remembered this because I saw a cloaked person outside, which reminded me of harry potter, which reminded me of this for some reason. Weird.

      Legend:
      Dream
      Notes
      Awake
    2. cccxxix. Shapeshifter friend

      by , 10-02-2021 at 02:04 AM
      8th September 2021

      Fragment:

      (from an earlier awakening, most detail lost)

      I'm with someone. It's a person of an alien species. He (?) is like a gel of energy that is contained within a humanoid shaped vessel. In the dream I eventually understand that this is purposefully metaphorical. He is very young and is more mature than most humans but has much to learn. His species gains the ability to take on other forms as they get older but for the most part for now he can only leave the humanoid shape and take an amorphous shape.

      We are friends and do things together, but I forget what. I think he sets up a physical MMO server thing of some kind and other people start joining our realm (BL intrusion?). Eventually, he finds another person of his species and I'm happy for him since he can share his unique aspects with someone else.

      I remember he actually also had the ability to exit his humanoid vessel and go into other objects. At one point he goes into one of two giant screens and his friend does the same with the free screen. This was relevant for the MMO thing but I don't remember how.

      The setting seems to be mostly urban, semi-futuristic. At some point we're inside a great house or hall, it feels like an ancient library, with a techy feel.

      Notes:

      - The shapeshifting gel energy being is obviously an intrusion from ST: DS9, since I have been watching this recently. In the dream it felt novel, and at the time of first recall it still had some of that feel.
    3. Half-Life 2 and imbalanced transformation | [26.07.2021]

      by , 07-26-2021 at 08:10 PM (Draeger's Dream Journal and Documentation)
      Half-Life 2 and imbalanced transformation
      Apparently, I am Gordon from Half-Life 2 in this scene. Dr. Kleiner is with me in a half-destroyed room. There are big holes in the wall and debris on the floor, as well as a bridge made of metal grating and a pulley mechanism attached to it, which can be drawn in/out from within this room to pass over to another building, like in Half-Life 2: Episode One. He tells me to do something with suit batteries, and I jokingly think that it's weird that the level designers did this, when in the original Half-Life 2 game, they used car batteries.

      Scene change. I am in the same room of my home where the 3rd dream, 19.07.2021 ended, and am myself again. I am tending to my water snails which are in a jar between many plant pots. Then, I have a fake memory where my mother apparently blew into something which resembles a fallen-off flower blossom, which can apparently transform you into whatever you are currently thinking about when you blow into it, but apparently, she gave it to me but I threw it away for some reason. Now, I want it again, so I look for another one and find one I think resembles it. I know it could be poisonous, so I am a bit anxious, but I blow into it to see if it would work. Instead of doing what I hoped for, it blew up into poisonous plant sap.

      Scene change. The previous scene transitions by me running backwards into another room of sorts which is hard to describe. It is dark and there is another metal grating bridge, and apparently, if you fall down, you fall into the bathroom of my home from the ceiling. I sit on a duplicate of the sink in my bathroom. Apparently, blowing into the blossom did do something, but it does not work because it's apparently unbalancing the forces, or something, so bad things will happen because of that.



      Waking up from that was really weird. For a few minutes, I couldn't remember where and who I was and had great difficulty to notice that the dream didn't really happen.
    4. cclxxx. Playful disagreement, Not myself

      by , 06-05-2021 at 03:17 PM
      5th June 2021

      Fragment:

      Here at home, with H. We're going downstairs and we get ready to go out. We have some kind of playful tussle or disagreement.

      (recall was too weak despite having felt very present in the dream, mind wandered after waking)

      Fragment:

      Middle or end bit of a dream, first part involved one of my aunts and was in a building. Later, in a town like my old town, sort of sunny but cloudy? I'm walking along the edge of town, slightly higher up than the rest of it which is in a sort of dip.

      There's a Covid context but nobody is wearing masks or distancing properly. I'm not myself anymore, now I'm a male character and I'm walking outside with this young woman. We're about the same age and we are a couple. We're in the middle of town at one point and it's busy. Someone mentions something about white gypsies and I wonder to myself if this isn't offensive in some way. I'm following the woman, she has a slim build but I can't remember what she's wearing.

      She bumps into an old lady a bit carelessly as we walk into a sort of square area, the old lady says to her "you'll have to self-isolate now!", in a somewhat vindictive way that implied she'd just passed on infection. As we walk through town we eventually become lost and we ask a middle-aged lady for directions. She shows us the town on a paper map. I try to figure out and understand where our house is.

      Vague recall but later, after several very deliberately "dream-like" encounters, with recurring characters that appear and disappear at different points and with changing physical features such as a lift that shifts it's entrance, we walk through a dark tunnel. Sort of subway/transit hub-like in style, just an access corridor, but there is no light, I don't recall how I am able to see.

      We then enter a different room, slightly brighter and kind of large, but still dark and underground. There are four characters here who block us, or have our full attention. They appear like teenagers or something at first and then morph into large and sort of fat orange worm-like creatures, their long bodies are sort of ribbed; they retain some human aspect, a face perhaps. They gloat, as if they'd won or something. One says "the human body is 0.91 grams of sodium. 68% sodium" and the illogical part of the math just passes me by but in the dream I'm so fully in the role of this young man that I don't really think like myself anyway. The creatures imply that we are be feed for something, either them or their master, but this something is small, I feel.

      Everything actually feels dreamlike for most of this bit, I think about how we (me and my female partner) must be having a joint dream and these creatures had invaded our dream to bring us their gloating message.

      Eventually they let us go and this idea and feeling passes, especially because I expect some dream-like transition but there isn't one. We go back to our place though I don't recall how we get there. It's also dark and dingy, most of the second half of the dream is. We have to get some things to eat, which we pick out of this small polygonal box. She picks something, not sure what now and it was apparently the right thing to pick, as a character appears and groans complaining about how she made the right choice. She had apparently sussed out that there were certain script-like sigils that had to do with the bad characters. I struggle to pick something myself, eventually picking this odd and partly rusty metal object with a somewhat industrial look to it. It has a bit of that rust converter's purple tinge too. The object has a hex key end on one side and the other end of it widens out a bit; the object is very sharply faceted.

      I openly ask and wonder if this is the right thing. Seems that it is though and then we are somewhere else. Still dark, there's a table. My female partner is engaged in some activity with her object, maybe firing arrows made of light? She seems obsessed, almost drunk with power or something. I try to figure out what my object does. There's a man here with us, too, he had appeared before in the dream and is some kind of guide, in his fifties or so.

      I use my object like a pen over the table and it seems to write in ink made of light. I effortlessly make script-like sigils like those from before except made of light. The drawn sigils over the table flash and quickly fade away once they are complete.



      Notes:

      - I went to bed somewhat late and I had looked at a few things in the shed beforehand that may have just fed into some of the shapes in the dream, such as the polygonal box and the faceted metal "pen".

      - I don't recall hearing or thinking about names at any point, even the woman I was with. She mirrored me in several physical aspects but I remember nothing about the character I was, I never saw myself, I simply "felt" like someone else, including physically to a point.

      - Many of the environmental elements were familiar to the area around my old home, except geological features, which were more like lowlands or short rolling hills.

      - The worm creatures' physical appearance seemed to be based off flexible ducting type of tubes and their orange was a sort of bright workplace orange kind of colour.

      - Odd that I felt I'd title the second fragment as "not myself", since that is effectively the (actual) problem mom had just last night.

      - After waking, most of this second dream did immediately feel very symbolic and story-like. My female partner felt like an anima archetype (especially as she later became apparently domineering), and the character I was in the role of felt like a hero archetype.
    5. ccxlv. Dark subterranean place, Deceptive Enterprise

      by , 03-31-2021 at 09:55 AM
      31st March 2021

      Fragment:

      I am somewhere underground, dark. It's like BL but not quite. Someone has discovered a hack or made a mod that lets you directly access certain game stats. I become a lycan creature and find that I can easily mine through the rock in one hit with my claws.

      I look for and find gold ore which is also mined easily. I sometimes stumble into large and more open cavern systems. There seem to be bottomless pits in places and in the distance there is light sometimes, lava or something I think I assume.

      There's some recall of interacting with other people or characters and a big sequence about conversion (into an energy form) in some cathedral-like place that reminds me of a map I made a couple of years ago, but recall is mostly gone.

      (recall gap)

      Something about Picard getting into a confrontation with some aliens where the Enterprise is disguised as a vessel like what these aliens have. They don't trust him and they realise the deception. The captain makes some kind of plea in order to try and avoid them from going further towards human space but the aliens seem unwilling to compromise.

      Then something about the Enterprise and its crew needing to be offloaded somewhere while the ship is repaired. The captain is on Earth trying to find a suitable temporary location for a camp?

      Notes:
      - This fragment was from waking up in the middle of the night. I couldn't get back to sleep very easily, I think I was too hot. I did not recall any morning dreams.
      - When I woke up, I remember I was thinking about M/M stuff and a server I joined recently, but I'm not sure why. There was no link with the dreaming, that I can tell.
    6. cxxxi. Lucidity! And self-indulgence

      by , 08-04-2020 at 01:07 PM
      4th August 2020 ~11:30

      Dream:

      Near the end of a stupidly long non-lucid part; I was falling through a pipe, I was with a squad to take something out in a facility. But then as I was falling, everything seemed still.

      I was in a void of sorts and time seemed to pass slower, the others were still here with me. It felt like being in water, and there was a similar visual effect. The squad leader, turned to me and said "you must pick the right one this time!" and I suddenly saw a vision of who to pick.

      Then I was in a room. There were three guardians and some other characters. I picked the one from my vision. It was true that it was the start of a cycle that I was now breaking, at the start of this long non-lucid part I was in a very similar situation.

      But this time I had picked "correctly". As a result, my consciousness shifted, I was now the guardian I'd picked. I noticed my hands, I had three fingers and one thumb. I became lucid but it came slowly, not like in the past.

      There was no "aha!" moment or sudden shift. I realised I was in a version of my mom's first office room. The characters were gone, I think; and to confirm my lucidity further I grabbed a metal shelving unit in the room and threw it through a wall, fully expecting it to go through as if it were a ghost, and it did!

      I wasn't sure what I wanted to do, since I hadn't fully expect to be lucid. I decided to indulge in one of my fantasies and decided to become a giant anthropomorphic lizard. It sort of worked... I saw myself in third person, wearing a labcoat (my artificial dream sign) as an anthro lizard. But I wanted to be myself in first person, I get tired of seeing things in third person in dreams and so I willed it and then was myself as the lizard. I looked down and saw the city-sprawl below me. I had reptilian-like feet with claws and I could see I had an emerald green skin but it was not as dark as I wanted. I tried to give myself different sexual features but it didn't work either.

      I was happy enough the transformation worked in the basic sense in any case and started to have some fun by putting myself against the ground and sort of rubbing along it for lack of better words. I paused and checked my hands again, just having a good look at them. They were hardly as scaly as I'd expected and this felt disappointing but I carried on. I remember noticing the atmosphere effect but oddly enough when I was standing I didn't notice the curvature effect of the planet. I was big enough that I should have been able to notice it.

      While the terrain did get sort of crunched/destroyed/etc by whatever I did, I wasn't able to see the cities in any great amount of detail and could not notice any mountains either. I was too big I suppose. I could feel my tail at several points but overall the feel of my body was mostly whole/complete.

      Spoiler for Self-indulged arousal:


      After this self-indulging, I realised the city/landscape I'd been having fun on and with was really just a square section in a rather large room. At the edges, the atmosphere effect sort of cut off, it was interesting.

      I was standing up and looked around the room for the first time; lots of metal pipes and dark metal things, like grates and slits where some natural light came through from. It had an extremely industrial look. As I looked around I still felt that I was very big, but the room's scale made me feel smaller in a sense, despite how much room I took.


      My lucidity was fading a little and I'd become a bit bored, I didn't expect to end my fantasy so soon but this was obviously the result of not pre-planning any of this. I saw a character less than half my size, by a sewer-tunnel looking bit. I approached, I asked him "Who are you?", quite curious about this metal-flesh sort of monster, the look only describable as being drawn from many such archetypes.

      He gave me a reply veiled in mystery, that I cannot recall anymore, but he did not answer my question in its most basic form and I didn't think of asking again. I got bored of him and decided he was quoting from something, but I forget what he was saying, unfortunately.

      I looked around again. This felt so different from my previous lucid experiences. I was calm, and it didn't take much effort to be calm; the dream was far less vivid and detailed than other lucids and indeed even less than some non-lucids, but I appreciated this moment. I enjoyed not feeling my daily pain.

      Then, out of nowhere, I heard a deep echoing voice. It told me "You must kill your brother, remember?". Some less conscious part of me, replied automatically "I know, I know! But not now." Before I could add anything of my own will, the voice spoke again to the effect of "Very well, he shall be kept alive for now." The voice faded completely and I simply finished by again automatically saying "Good."

      I didn't appreciate this family-related intrusion into my lucidity but realised it was from a deeper part and so didn't really wish to alter it.

      My lucidity may have been fading again but I decided to simply explore these strange halls, carelessly stepping over that square world I'd been playing with earlier and heading for a doorway on the opposite corner from where I was. There were many artificial warm light accents around the metal halls. I eventually found myself on a gantry bit and there were random people both there and on a lower tier. I played around with some telekinesis on some red and blue barrels, trying to lob them but doing so poorly at first. I started to gain a more intuitive understanding as I did it but it did not feel as "mentally driven" as I'd expected, having to move my hands a fair bit.

      My form had been consistent through my lucidity, I still had reptilian traits and my hands were clawed now, I recall. A random human character next to me looked up to me and said "Don't throw them with your arms like a real barrel." Or something like that. I understood from this to use hand motions more. I tried lifting a barrel and pulling it toward me, having done so too much and then pushing it forward a little more with some related hand motions.

      I tried to hit a person in the lower tier with the barrel but it didn't quite work or something. Then I went down some stairs. I was in a mall area and my lucidity was fading but not gone. A dream character was upset with me, he was some manager for the mall. "You're ruining everything with your lucidity!" He said, or something.

      He was extremely upset that I was doing whatever I pleased. There was a woman nearby I'd somehow gotten fired or something (but she was all the more happy about it) and the man became angry and he wanted to have a serious go at me now.
      But I somehow just turned it against him, kind of willing some help from the woman and she automatically started defending me, distracting the manager man. I was no longer lucid at this point and had been letting myself go along with the dream too much. Eventually I just woke up.



      Edit:

      Spoiler for Notes (in spoiler due to their length):

      Updated 08-04-2020 at 05:12 PM by 95293

      Categories
      lucid , non-lucid , memorable , side notes
    7. Amphibian on wheels

      by , 06-22-2020 at 12:54 PM
      ...after some other dream scene, I'm in a dark street, a man is yelling as he's pointing to some bug: "there it is!, it was in our boat before!" The insect keeps moving but I could hardly see it. Then I change the view to a house, couple of feet away, seems more like a building with a big garage. I focus on it and I see some creature, with long extremities crawling on the wall; the man insists on catch it, but I think to myself: "he should leave it alone, he could harm it". I see clearly now! the man grabs a frog, it's all striped black and goldenrod, from head to toe, it changes in size (of course I'm fixing my attention on it). He puts wheels on all extremities, starting with the left hand. He's planning on getting inside the amphibian, which is now bigger than him, so he decides to ride it!
    8. The Jaguar Woman

      by , 05-26-2020 at 10:45 PM
      Thursday Night, 11/7/19

      I was hiking through a forest and I came out into an open field, accidentally spawning a large bear as I did so. I had to run away from it using video game controls. It morphed from bear, to wolf, to lion, to jaguar and long story short I couldn't increase the distance between me and it no matter what tactics I used.

      Gradually the environment shifted from video game to realistic until I was running in my own body rather than using controls. Knowing I stood no chance remaining in the open field, I dove into the deep river to my left and swam across. I pulled myself out onto the opposite river bank and found myself back among the trees. But of course jaguars are excellent swimmers so the big cat followed me easily. As it came out of the water the jaguar transformed into a woman. She was beautiful and lithe, dressed in flowing white, with the cold expression of a seasoned killer. We came out onto a wide and empty paved road that cut through the trees. I walked backwards and shot invisible arrows at her which made her health bar go down - a remaining feature from the video game - but she was otherwise unfazed. She was slowly walking toward me holding an already bloodied sword which she didn't even bother to raise. She said, "It's always hard to kill something for the first time." Clearly she was not referring to herself. She seemed to be implying that any reluctance to kill on my part would give her the advantage.

      you guys!!! you guys!!! LUCIDNESS!!!-jaguar_woman.jpg

      We both stopped walking and she informed me flatly that I was out of arrows. Her health bar was only at half. I knew I would have to use my sword and hack away for my life. I wasn't very skilled with a sword. That is to say I'd never used one before. As the jaguar woman raised her own sword it was immediately clear she was in her element. My alarm went off, yanking me out of there and into a waking state.

      Updated 12-03-2020 at 01:55 AM by 17503 (added drawing)

      Categories
      non-lucid , nightmare , memorable
    9. I transformed into a friend

      by , 08-09-2019 at 03:57 PM
      For this dream I tried to transform into a female friend of mine.

      I was in a house that was not familiar. It was almost like a log cabin. Something ticked in my brain and I did a reality check. I made my way to the bathroom, and saw myself in the mirror. I thought of my lucid goal then went for it. I reached for the sink put some water in my hand then proclaimed "this magic potion will transform me into x". I saw and felt myself shrink down into her. It was a fairly fast process, that felt like a tingling. I shrank 10 inches in height, and lost 70 pounds. My clothing shifted into her black t-shirt and black jeans. I was my friend clothing and all in the mirror. I felt the weight of the long black shoulder blade length hair on my head. I felt the weight of having breasts on my chest. I then said to myself "whoah I am x"! Then I kept saying stuff in her voice which amused me. I decided I would walk around a bit, It felt so bizarre I had her hip sway and wiggle. I also had the the distinct feeling of having a really tight pair of panties on that cupped my crotch and undercarriage in a way that I never thought possible. It was almost like phantom limb between my legs. I walked around the house a bit then went outside, it was really bright and sunny. I walked down a sidewalk for a bit then woke up.
    10. Lucid and Flew - September 9

      by
      ZAD
      , 09-10-2018 at 07:39 PM (ZAD's DJ)
      Sep 9 2018

      I was walking through a large paved road which felt like a walkway through a large park. It was a sunny morning or afternoon. The lawns on either side were lined with large oaks with twisting branches. There were passerby walking in either direction. Suddenly I became lucid and started running! I looked back and saw a DC. I turned around fully again, expecting to see a coworker from one of my college jobs*, and she was there! I was running backwards at this point to let her catch up, but for some reason couldn't stop or change directions, and instead had to run backwards, slower. When I reached her I made some conversation about the fact that I was dreaming, and she seemed thrilled. I took her hand and we started running together. We passed a few trucks (possibly ice cream trucks or food trucks) and signs, and I was able to read them clearly. I asked her whether she had ever flown before, and she responded that she hadn't, all she had ever done was float. I told her that that was a good start and we lifted off.

      I can feel the wind on my face and body and we're still holding hands (platonically). We weren't doing superman poses or anything specifically to indicate that we were flying, just setting my intention on a direction and going there. It was a great sensation. The oaks stretched even farther up now, and I bobbed and weaved through the twisted outstretched branches. I had a few near misses but overall had pretty good control.

      I decided to go higher than the trees and went skyward. At which point I could see in the top of my field of vision three or four wooden planks arranged like ceiling blade fans. I passed above the planks and at that point there were flat planes rushing past us. I looked down at my hands and while still holding my coworker's hands, I pushed my finger through my palm -- I felt some resistance at first but asserted "I'm dreaming" and was able to do it. Then I felt the dream stabilize a bit.

      As I looked back up, I saw that it was approaching dusk with a sunset in front of us. Underneath was a large wooden building with multiple levels with wraparound balconies. It reminded me of the restaurant I worked at for a while. I approached it and landed on the roof (it may have just been me at this point). I saw a small shack/building on the roof. Upon further examination it looks similar to a dollhouse made of craft wood -- I can clearly see the seems and the semi-gloss finish on the wood. The dream
      fades quickly.

      Note: I woke up from this dream at 6am on my left side.

      Summary of other NLs:
      I'm in a kitchen by a white door with glass panes near the head and the foot. The house reminds me of a classmate from my high school band's house. There were multiple locks that were complicated and kind of hard to turn. Once I turned them, my anonymous DC sidekick switched some small levers which had clear writing on them in a row. There is a silhouette outlined in the door and I think what lies behind it is a dark garage. I have a serious talk with my DC sidekick. We open the door and go through, and pass through the dark garage (felt ominous, there were other silent DCs there).

      I'm in a garden/walkway with a girl. We look up and see bright flashing in the clouds above. It takes a triangluar shape and turns into a spaceship with clear writing on it (reminded me for some reason of the writing on a bus or van). We run over hill after hill and past trees to keep seeing it. Each time we get it back into our field of vision it's more detailed. Finally we see that there is a ledge on the back of it and there are giant women sitting there. They send down some smaller but still giant women who fire beams at us. We run in the opposite direction and become extremely cartoon-like in our actions. I fuse with her and our arms and chest start spinning; there are now two copies of me, one driving the process and one fused with her. We fire beams back at the giants chasing us as we run down a dirt path in the garden. This dream repeats twice or thrice featuring different versions (ages, genders, ethnicities, other factors changed) of both me and the girl. Very vivid and very surreal.

      I'm at a store getting various items (I remember some onion bread buns in a bag that I got IWL from Walmart). I get some impulse items that I know my fiancee will be mad at me about. It's a pretty long dream as I go down the aisles. Finally I go down the clearance/general/jam aisle, where I find a stack of fresh papers. Underneath the papers I find some that I've drawn on (during my visit or my past several visits). I try to consolidate them as they're spaced out between blank pages. Someone passes me in the aisle and notices one full-color one I've done, I look up and say it's nothing, then look back down and it's even more polished and is the cover to a small booklet or magazine (maybe a doujin). I consolidate them all and tuck them into the bottom for safe keeping.

      I'm in a large bathroom with long white counters and four or five sinks stretching out to the right and left, separated by double doors. I'm at the sink closest to the door on the right counter. The stalls are behind us. There are some middle-aged men holding bags and placing their miscellany on the counters, it looks like stuff you would get in those cap-balls from the 25 cent machines (where you turn the handle). Mixed in are brass gears and writing utensils.



      *With my ability to summon DCs, it seems like I pretty much pick them at random; I haven't thought about these people in years but for some reason my lucid mind thinks "Gee, I would love to see X random acquanitance." I suspect that as I get better about remembering dream goals and incorporating my awareness of waking life, I'll be able to make more logical/planned decisions within my lucids.
    11. Lucid Again, and a Realistic Nightmare FA - September 3

      by
      ZAD
      , 09-03-2018 at 09:21 PM (ZAD's DJ)
      Sep 3 2018

      Woke 3:35. In a fight with parents and grandpa about cooking or setting up something (possibly speed-reading). Daylight outside, long tables (possibly crawfish boil).

      Woke 5:05. Long fragment in a stadium, receiving some sort of business presentation from coworker. After it's over, I'm picking up my laptop bag and I stand out of the way for a coworker and an unnamed DC, who say that they have a "merge request in the morning". The presenter (another coworker) is kicking us out.

      Awoke directly from FA nightmare. My dog barked and I could tell instantly that it was serious, not just him barking at another dog. The door to the bedroom is thrown open and the midget from Twin Peaks season 3 entered with a small gun. He approached the bed, not looking directly at me or anyone, just at the wall behind us. He said something vague and I tried to lean up in bed asking something to the extent of "What do you want?". As I tried to move, and in some sense solve the problem, my vision blurred and the dream started to fade. He was wearing a blue shirt with the pattern of "I (heart) N Y" but the letters were "? (eye symbol) T Y" in white. The room's layout was completely realistic and accurate unlike other false awakenings. I woke up and said "holy shit" aloud. Very scary experience, but very vivid -- would have been invaluable if I could have gotten lucid and converted it.

      Before that, I was in my childhood home, on the phone with my manager about something that needed to get done. The screen was black with red nubmbers and dial-screen graphics, and an orbiting globe outline. The call got dropped. I was worrying about this with my parents but they seemed to think it would all work out (it was nighttime). My sister was in my room on my computer, looking for the first book in a series my fiance is currently reading. I suggested that she can just read my fiance's copy rather than buy it herself. I end up also giving her a japanese manga volume and another poorly translated japanese book, I remember the engrish being hilarious in-dream. After this, I went to the kitchen (all of the lights were out). I was trying to write down my dreams in ink on the wood floors. In the back of my mind I knew this was a terrible idea and that my dad would be furious, but in the moment I wasn't worried about it. There were some drops of water on the floor and it was smearing the ink, so I started wiping it up, making the smearing even worse. I was also worried about cockroaches.

      After the ink, I found myself in a distinct dream scene. I was on the ground looking up at the side of a cliff maybe 4 or 5 stories high. There was a good bit of dirt caked on and I thought to myself how nice it would look if I could get the dirt off. I grabbed a wedge-shaped piece of reddish slate and scraped as much dirt as I could off and stepped back, and noticed how nice the geometric patterns were. I remember the thought-phrase "cliff face". When I looked again, one of the rock formations sort of looked like a nose, and the one below looked like a mouth! When I started examining the rest of the cliff, the whole thing was taken up by face structures (abstract and Easter Islandish). The ground went from being solid dirt and rock, to having some cracks in which curved red boards were shoved and prying the cracks apart. In the cracks were green cylindrical vegetables (I thought of okra or fat asparagus stalks). As I moved forward towards the cliff, I noticed a mesh oyster bag of sea urchins, which were moving around each other in the bag, sort of like you expect spike balls to in a metroidvania or platformer. This was a really vivid and overall nice and creative dream that's simple but feels profoundly peaceful, the kind of nonlucid you generally want to have. So of course this scene transitioned directly to the nightmare FA.

      I woke again at 8:59. My fiance was in trouble. We were in some sort of college sign-up, car buying, or other related scenario. There were DCs everywhere, and specifically several DCs with deep blue eyes and short hair meant her harm in an insidious way (they were outwardly friendly). I became more and more adversarial over the course of the dream, eventually hitting them and throwing things at them. We moved from the student union/indoor car lot into a side hallway which transitions to a long house with lots of corridors and small rooms arranged in pretty much a straight-shot, but almost labyrinthine at the same time. I was thinking somehow they were hypnotizing her, and she was getting more and more bruises on her arms and abdomen. Eventually I get in exaggerated physical fights with them and I somehow manage to get 2-4 of them to defect to my side as allies and stow her away under a sliding hole in the kitchen (sort of a drain hole in the floor, like you see in restaurant kitchens). She escaped succesfully.

      I'm unknowingly in an FA but think I'm fully awake. I am having the "transparent eyelids" effect, and I'm looking around my bedroom at the closet door, but it's the wooden closet door from my childhood home. I'm etching a human face in it with my mind.

      After this, I'm in my childhood home and members of my family as well as random DCs are dressed in "starship troopers armor" -- white and blue, and white and red. It was a long and in-depth dream, but I don't remember much of it. I finally escaped the fray and sat back on my bed, but then my father entered my room with his gun held high, and I remember thinking "oh good, you'll just be my bodyguard". When I thought this (non-lucidly), he changed his course of action from running forward to attack me to climbing in bed next to me with his rifle held out (think Fullmetal Jacket "This is my rifle"). I got up from bed* and started walking towards the hallway. Almost instantly I became lucid! I didn't say "I'm dreaming!" or do any RCs or stabilization unfortunately. I walked down the hallway towards the bathroom, and it was daylight outside, maybe early morning. I walked into the bathroom and looked at the mirror, seeing a girl in a dress instead of myself. In this moment, I started to think of the "bad guys" in the starship troopers armor and then banished the thought from my mind, knowing that if I thought of them I would encounter or summon them. So instead I took advantage of the situation -- although I was seeing the girl in the mirror, I felt my dream body as my own physical body. So I turned away from the mirror and decided that I would become the girl in the mirror. I turned back around and I was!
      Spoiler for nudity:
      inspected my face further in the mirror -- my face was sort of ugly and homely**, and as mirrors in dreams usually do, my face shifted quite a bit. I leaned in further to inspect myself and kissed the mirror (it was cold). I then leaned back out and decided to try my "Clear sight. Clear sound. Clear touch. Grounded. Calm, confident. I can stay here as long as I want." stabilization phrase. However, as soon as touched my thumb and forefinger, I accidentally said "Clear mind" first!
      It rejected me from the dream instantly. As I began to feel my waking body, I realized my thumb and forefinger were touching here too; maybe this triggered the waking?

      I laid awake for quite a while after that, as I had already slept more than usual for the night, and for the whole weekend basically. I was also still excited about the lucid and hoping to drop back into it. Eventually I went back to sleep and had some more non lucids. In the first, I was with my fiance in a rest area/cabin in the woods. In the next, I felt as though I dropped into the dream as a visualization from waking, but it's possible I was only visualizing from an FA. I was imagining tall waves, and how my body bobbed up and down in them. It felt incredibly nice and peaceful. I was at a beach, and my sister was standing on a board of some kind zipping up a life jacket. I think my fiance was bobbing up and down in the water too. When I looked at the shore, I couldn't quite see the sand but I could see tall buildings above the waves, which I identified to be my apartment buildings from WL. A distinct black shape was swimming towards me, and I thought it might be a shoe or a fish (I thought it could be a dangerous fish but dismissed the thought instantly). After another waking, I had a final dream of being in a wood panneled shop with an old woman who was offering the shop to me (inheritance?). Her wares were laid out on a long wooden table, which after looking away and looking back turned out to be a giant Knorr pasta packet. I believe this all happened in 3rd person.



      *I think getting out of beds in nonlucids is a lucidity/awareness trigger -- will have to investigate how to encourage this).
      **This is actually the second time I've transformed my body into a woman's in a mirror while lucid, but for some reason I always turn into butterfaces. Also not sure why I keep doing this. Why, lucid mind, why?

      Updated 09-03-2018 at 09:38 PM by 95458 (color)

      Categories
      lucid , non-lucid , nightmare , false awakening , memorable , dream fragment
    12. xxvii.

      by , 08-21-2018 at 11:13 AM
      Non-dream stuff - this has been the pattern for the last few days. I woke up at 8:30 but somehow fell asleep again despite not wanting to, waking up two hours later. Been having long non-lucid dreams on the first waking but usually forget too many details by the second waking.



      Dream part 1:
      I was playing a game like the new Monster Hunter, I even remember thinking "this game is too similar to Monster Hunter, feels a bit like a rip-off". It was day time but dim. I was playing a male hunter, walking around some marshland and there was an old ruin/structure, and there was an inscription on top. For some reason I changed character to a female hunter, and then used the grappling hook to get on top of the old structure. I was a bit clumsy about it but I stood close to the inscription and read it.

      I can't remember what it said, but it was 3 sentences and was cryptic.

      Details are missing here between the next part.

      Dream part 2:
      I remember I was hunting a large creature in the marshland with other hunters but then at some point there is a transition and I become a giant creature myself. I seem to remember the form I took was of a female reptilian biped, with creamy/dirty white scales. I then went around the world and met other creatures and either changed the type I was or simply got bigger.

      Eventually I remember seeing a (in the dream context) god-like creature, which was so big it's difficult to describe with words; only the foot was under the clouds and even though I was a giant too my size was only of this creature's toes.

      I climbed up the furry leg, which I seem to remember being brown or orange fur, getting past the clouds and seeing the sun; it had a skirt and I came to the conclusion it was female and kept climbing up her leg until eventually I reached her shoulder.

      I can't remember what happened next other than I had a brief discussion with her; her father had made her upset for some reason.



      Notes:
      • This is the very rare dream type I typically enjoy quite a lot even if it's non-lucid. Unfortunately I did not think to RC at any point, despite the "massive" cues.
      • The last dream I had of a similar sort was a couple of years ago, but it wasn't half as detailed nor was it of the same scale.
      • I think I'm still doing poorly in regards to setting intentions about dreaming lately.
      • The "goddess" creature reminds me now of a character I've seen an artist portray, so I'm thinking that's where her visual appearance stemmed from.
      • From the first part to the second part, the feeling of being in a game was gradually reduced, until it felt more "real", especially with the climbing. Maybe because of the physical "effort"?
    13. x.

      by , 07-28-2018 at 10:22 AM
      A few non-lucid dream sequences/fragments. My dreams felt very long and the places I was in felt vast.



      Sequence 1:

      One of the last sequences; I remember being driven by my partner to a small white building. It was the lobby for some sort of research complex. I went in and it was decorated with white and black inside, and there was a receptionist, a slim black-haired woman with her hair tied in a knot and she was wearing a black suit with skirt and a pair of glasses. She was speaking to someone else, both of them were standing up, though her desk was at a normal sitting height. She was explaining something to this other guy. She noticed me as I approached and I said I wanted a job there or something, she asked me what relevant skills I had; I answered truthfully (in waking life context), that I had not had many formal jobs. I also said something else random like I was good at blasting things or something.

      She then said "let's see what you got then". And then I simply remember being in another area that looked like an old or ruined town, and what looked like trenches or canals. She was there and in a different outfit, with a sword; I had a sword and a shield and I could see myself in third-person now (so it had become like a game), wearing a similar roman-era battle outfit. She got a few blows in first but I bashed her with the shield and she fell on the floor and I struck her with the sword in long swipes; sword swipes left a glowing trail behind them.

      There's something missing in my memory of the sequence here; next I am at what feels like an underground facility, the research complex. I am in a cylindrical room, on its upper half, which was separated from the bottom by thick glass and metal beams that made an aesthetically pleasing pattern. There were researchers here on upper half and on the bottom half I saw a test subject (which in my dream-mind I knew was a volunteer, like I was for the project) walk in through a doorway, to the centre of the room, where there was a raised platform. A researcher was in front of the subject on a control panel and adjust some things and the subject transformed into a 50ft/15metre creature; as a creature, it was pink and white-ish and with flowing appendages, not quite like tentacles. It also looked semi-translucent in parts. I have a dream-memory of seeing several transformations, each with very different resulting creatures, but all large.

      At some point before this entire sequence I remember seeing a similar giant creature like the one that, before I "knew" about the research complex, and it had been in some sort of combat situation. It may have been in the previous sequence.

      I remember watching more of these transformations and wondering if they would do me at some point. My memory of this dream sequence ends here.



      Edit: Made this 3D image of how I generally remember the transformations room. I didn't add a lot of detail simply because I don't remember it anymore. The grain is just because it's a quick render (6minutes).

      Fragment 2:

      This came before Sequence 1, and was just as long, though I only remember fractioned details.

      I remember being in a different ruined city area, which I got to by going down some steps under a mountain or something. I remember seeing some sort of interface for my health points and equipment, and my health was very low. I had no top on either, and for some reason in the dream context that made me extremely vulnerable. There were rats and other pests around, and I remember I got to a place where there was some sort of faction's base, where they were defending from another faction. One of the guys there wanted me to train first, and he had me lie down on a table of some kind where they either injected me with something or attached something; either way, something like an exoskeleton formed and my fear of being vulnerable went away. They explained something about the process, how a sodium injection was required but wasn't the only key to this. I remember there was a training room in the downstairs of the base.

      Fragment 3:

      In the same region as before, I remember being on a stereotypical Asian looking rooftop, and looking around and seeing the mountain where I came from, with the steps under an overhang. It was day, but the sun wasn't very high and there was cloud cover, though it didn't quite cover the sun. There were a lot of shadows. Looking around more there were other mountains to the left and then further left were plains and forests, back up to the point of seeing the steps mountain again. On the rooftop was someone else. A boy or a girl or a young-ish person anyway. They told me something about the winds that were coming and that we had to do something. I could see large, fast, clouds coming very low from the mountains. I don't remember much else other than seeing this character before in an alleyway.



      Some notes:
      • The sparring match with the receptionist went on for quite a while and I remember that even though my sword would cut her to chunks, she would "respawn" and we'd fight again. The combat reminds me now of Warframe and Shadow Warrior (both of which have strong Asian themes).
      • The first time I saw the giant creatures outside of the research complex I was not aware that they were human test subjects, so when I saw the transformation process I felt bad for having participated in a combat with one, especially given that I felt I'd rather be on the creature's side anyway.
      • Watching the creature transformation process I remember feeling a bit envious. In the context of waking life, I know that transformations of even the smallest degree are impossible, but a part of my subconscious still desires them, which attracts me to creative content that represents those themes. The transformation theme in general is a clear dream-sign, but one that I must remember to set an intention to make notice of, due to its prominence in games, and therefore the fact that it's so well embedded into a part of my reactions and behaviours towards it.
      • It is a little rare that transformation themes are so present in at least a couple of dream sequences. They were clear dream-signs and I should have done a RC.
      • The researchers at the complex wore no special clothes or outfits, they were dressed casually or with suits, so a potential dream-sign did not manifest there.
      • The "exoskeleton" wasn't so much an exoskeleton as it was making me "buff", I seem to remember.
      • Being at the rooftop especially should have made me RC due to a fear of heights, especially taking note that being a stereotypical rooftop, it was sloped.
    14. Three Vials (NLD)

      by , 10-22-2016 at 04:16 PM
      Ritual: Ongoing dry spell. I'm not sure what caused my focus and motivation to diminish so drastically, but neither has been sufficient in months to deliberately achieve lucidity. Even when I thought I've been motivated, I haven't been able to concentrate properly, or pay sufficient attention to the stages of sleep. Less attention to dreaming in general means that even my NLDs have become intolerably drab and dull for the most part, and since I've been journaling less my ability to remember dreams has also dwindled. However, this morning I woke up with a dream that I found interesting enough to write down, and I'm posting it here to try to help get my head back in the game.

      NLD, "Three Vials": The container in my hand consisted of three conjoined steel vials closed with screwcaps. Each one held a different substance that would change me in some way. I was in a militarized compound full of soldiers and agents of some secretive organization; I was their experiment. Evidently one of their high level people, an old man with grey shoulder-length hair, had decided that it was time for my transformation. I began unscrewing the top of one of the vials while remembering the prophecy:

      His breath is the wind.

      The method of ingestion seemed straightforward. Breath? Wind? I held the end of the vial to my mouth and inhaled. It did feel like a great wind coursing into me. When the turmoil had settled and I spoke, my voice was changed. It was no longer a human voice, but impossibly deep and resonant.

      There were things going on around me but I don't remember the details. I saw a news briefing of some sort; apparently the nation was in a state of emergency. I was being transformed so that I could go do battle, perhaps with another creature similar to what I was becoming. I decided to use the second vial. I had a vague anxiety that I should consume all three vials before someone stopped me: the old man had wanted to go through with the procedure, but I could tell that a lot of the others did not think this was a good idea. I should finish the transformation before someone decided to organize the opposition and restrain me. I recalled another line of the prophecy:

      Sunlight fills his heart.

      I opened the second vial. At first I habitually started bringing the container to my mouth, but the prophecy suggested that it contained light, so I diverted it to my eyes instead. White light filled them, blinding me. When I could see again, I went to look at myself in a mirror. My eyes were white now, but not an undifferentiated white. The pupils were tiny little pinpricks at the center, literally no larger than if the tip of a pin pricked a hole in a piece of paper. I thought that made sense, given that pupils contract in the light, and they had just been exposed to more light than ever before. The irises were still differentiated, but they were an ivory white and glowed as if with inner light around the inside of their circular rims. The whites of my eyes were now pure white.

      I also noticed that my skin had turned white, but not smoothly or evenly, instead it left a mottled appearance, prompting me to comment wryly: "I hope the last vial contains a pore cleanser." No one laughed at my joke. The dream ended before I ever found out what was actually in the final vial.

      Notes: There are some straightforward influences, though the dream transformed them into an original scenario. But the concept of putting things to my eyes and mouth clearly derives from the Vive VR game "Accounting," which I played last night. (It was brief and hilarious, I totally recommend it!) Then before bed I was playing Witcher II and noticed how cool Geralt's eyes looked. (I recently finished Witcher I, since I wanted to play all three in order, and just started on II. It is a breath of fresh air compared to the first one.) Having the Witcher series fresh in mind probably also contributed to the concept of drinking potions to achieve transformational mutations.

      Updated 10-22-2016 at 04:24 PM by 34973

      Categories
      non-lucid
    15. Witch, possessed

      by , 09-05-2016 at 04:01 PM
      A young woman's walking quickly through the woods just before dawn - the trees are sparse and thin, lots of fallen leaves from past seasons covering the ground; she's wearing simple dark clothing and a white cap, from maybe around the 1500s. She's very nervous. I follow her as she steals a black hen - she's thinking about some dog as she does it - and makes her way to a well.

      But just as she reaches the well, an older woman grabs her and shouts, "Witch! Possessed!" This woman's familiar to me. Painfully thin, red hair so short and strangely cut that I suspect it's growing out after being shaved off completely, wearing a nightdress as if she'd just seen my witch and jumped out of bed to stop her, but I don't believe it's a coincidence that she's here; I believe hunting witches is something she's done before.

      The scene changes. Three men - two middle-aged, one older, all still looking like it's the 1500s - are discussing the woman who'd been caught as a witch, and her mother. Her mother had been the same, accused of "magical transformations," but she'd died years and years ago, and the daughter had been raised by another since she was a child, changed her family name. The last these men had heard of her, she was to be married to some knight. They frame this marriage as a very good thing, that she had a good life that she's thrown away; but I hear them say this and I think indeed she was married to him, and that had gone very badly for her, and that's why she summoned me.

      Later. Different scene entirely, my IRL home, a pair of men attempted to break in and I turned them into cats. Cat burglars. They made for very angry cats but I was pleased with myself for the joke, and my sister had been wanting a white cat anyway.

      Updated 09-05-2016 at 04:04 PM by 64691

      Categories
      non-lucid
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