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sorry im posting this on an ipod, so im not gonna take the time to capitalize stuff or add apostrophes. also, sorry for any typing errors.

so im walking down a suburb street by my friend lauras house. lile not on the sidewalk, but in the middle of the road. it was a bright sunny day with big white fluffy clouds. i was walking along and i saw this kid standing in his lawn watching me. for some reason this made me question whether i was in a dream or not. i pinched the palm of my hand to check. it hurt, but not as much as it should have. so i flapped my arms downward, which made me float up. "cool! i am dreaming!" i thought. but because this is my first lucid, i wasnt really in full control. so i had to keep flapping my arms to stay afloat. thats all i remember.

09.08.2010

Soccer field (Non-lucid)

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID

If yesterday was one of my worst night, this last night was even worse.
If you follow my journal. you know I got a golden opportunity for my selfemployement and the quality of my life will skyrock (in addition of the income) I have been doing (and I am still) online meetings. Every time I tried to focus on dreams, I realized my mind was wandering around the business stuff. This night will be better, for sure. I must have another lucid to stop this bad nights. One fragment only on the whole night! (It has been months I recalled less than 3 dreams)

- Soccer.
- Images only.
- On the soccer fields.
- I felt I was were I never was.

Missed dream signs:
- Unknown.

What I would have done if lucid:
- Unknown.

1. I'm attending the Cincinnati Bengals training camp as T. O. For some reason I slap my thigh, and the sensation is enough to send me momentarily aware. I lose whatever lucidity I have before anything happens.

2. I am browsing a massive flea market full of books. I find an Unknown Armies monster manual for a cheap price (so much text with failed RCs), but before I can buy it my Mom approaches along with several college friends.

3. I am trapped inside a crumbling barn. As it falls around me, I manage to peel out of the twisted wreckage.

I also don't remember some of this dream, which I had just last night. As I've said, I've been working heavy hours and pretty long days, so me getting a sound sleep with fully-memorable dreams is an incredibly hard task to do right now. But I'm working on it.

I remember that I was with a group of four other girls, and we were to meet with another group of four girls. They wanted something that we possessed, but it was going to be a showdown on who was to get it. So, oddly enough, we met them at a cemetary and as I stood there, feeling uncertain, the leader of the other group stepped forward and gave us a wicked, evil smile.

I'm not too sure what happened then, except suddenly I was on the run and seperated from the people in my group. So I ran, except they were after me, and I was scared. And that's when it felt like a switch in my brain flipped, and power flooded me. A girl laid her hand on me, and I smacked my hand against her - and light poured out from my hand and knocked her back. It wasn't strong enough to hurt her, but just enough to protect me.

I'm not sure how I knew then, but I knew they were after me. So i turned tail and ran again as she laughed, a mocking and really creepy laugh.

I don't remember much of this dream - it happened two nights ago, and it was incredibly short. I haven't been sleeping very well.

Anyway, I remember I was at the mercy of a very powerful man. He had money to burn and he wasn't afraid to flaunt his power and outright murder people for refusing his demands. I wasn't sure how he managed to catch me, but I was watched and monitored every hour of every day. And soon, he began to "acquire" more girls. It was almost like he was making a collection of sorts, but I just couldn't figure out what was happening or why. We all looked remotely alike, too. Brown hair, blue eyes. . .

This one night he assembled the girls out on the deck and dressed them in a uniform that was both revealing, and somehow flattering to a female body. He was kind that night, and despite ourselves, we found we were laughing and we suddenly didn't feel so lonely and apart anymore. A sudden wave of homesickness fell over me, though, and as I looked up at the sky (for we were out on a deck under a waning moon), and I rested my head against the railing and sighed.

But I saw a flash, and as I looked up, I saw that the moon was suddenly. . . Very appealing. And it went from being a sliver to building in size and shape, until it was a full moon. Once completed, there was a blinding flash, and suddenly I was falling backwards - and I was in a completely different place.

I woke up.

I just realized I forgot to post this one here. It's been in my main DJ.

The dream that I remembered is a bit fragmented. I remember being in a room with a bunch of people, but there were two guys there that seemed more prominent than the rest. Later in the dream Joe and I were driving to school in his truck. It was really rainy and gross outside. We go inside the building and we see the two guys there again. One of the guys is blonde and the other has brown hair. One of them is wearing a yellow shirt. They were going to show us something in the school but we followed them in circles around a large group of people and lost sight of them. Joe and I get back in the car and wait for a few friends. It's still raining and the car starts to drive itself. We're pretty freaked out.

Later in the dream there was something about them asking a girl (which could have been Ana) to dinner, but there was something really malicious about it. I arrive at dinner late and they bust out the cameras and take pictures of all of us. In the end of the dream there was something about Joe and I in the top room of my house. We were looking out of the window through the blinds watching this girl and one of the two guys dancing together.

In real life, Ana wakes up and tells us about a dream she had of two guys (we were sharing a hotel room). I asked her if one of them had blonde hair and the other had brown hair and she said that they did. She also remembers the yellow shirt, being toured the school, eating in a cafeteria, and dancing at prom with one of them.

Remember two dreams from last night... one was a fully lucid dream.... and another one was a non lucid.

Lucid- I was sitting in a room with all of my relatives. My grandma asked me to do a reality check... so I plugged my nose... and sure enough! I could still breathe in! I Marvelled at how realistic it felt. It was truly physical... and It was very hard to convince myself it was a dream because of how real it felt... so I tried flying. It wasnt easy.... I flew like a little bit but because the dream felt truly physical and real... i just couldnt fly very much. I was able to fly over a couch... and that was about it. I was told to fully master my dream... I had to go into a room and choose from a book what I wanted to do... So I did.... I picked " ride around the grand canyon on a dinosaur" The dinosaur went strait up a lot of things which made it very scary.... because once again... it felt really physical. The dream mustve ended after that... because I dont remember anything. It wasnt the best... but hey... it was another lucid dream. Oh... and another thing.... I did not try to have it... but I have been doing reality checks whenever I thought About it. Also... I had a very hard time remembering my dreams and didnt until hours later.... and this leads me to believe I may be having more frequent lucid dreams.... But I NEED TO get my dream recall up.

Non Lucid- I went to the beach with my family... I wasnt sure how I got there I just was. There were two ropes in the water.... the first rope meant some danger and the second rope meant high danger. Me and my dad swam out to the high danger.... We were swimming when I mentioned to my dad that I saw things swimming in the water. He Said he did too... It was sharks.... dolphins.... and whales... I swam as fast as I could torwards shore.... as did my dad. I made it without problem. Later that night I was watching the news which was talking about the abundance of dangerous widelife there was that day. Not a very good dream if you ask me.

I had this dream (or series of interconnected dreams) this night, when I fell asleep from 6:00AM-5:00PM. I had used autosuggestion very loosely, so I'll call it a DILD.

Technique used: DILD
Length: 45 min

lucid non-lucid not a dream

I forgot a lot of the dream (I didn't write it in my RL DJ, and wasn't able to type this part till now, a good 6 hours later) but I do remember fragments. Also, it's good to note that I was starving when I went to sleep.

So, the dream started with a lot of my brother driving and a few of my cousins, we all hung out, and then we had to drive to get some food at my aunts. We got there, and there was a teleporter somewhere. I think I used the teleporter to teleport to my next dream scene.

This next part was all extremely vivid. I walked from my mom's car to a restaurant with her and my dad. My dad and I walked to the staff room (for a good reason I can't remember), which ended up being a large windowed room, with three layers of windows till there was the outside. I thought of doing a reality check, since that was weird. It was odd though, my reality check failed, but I still had the feeling I was in a dream. I tried two more times, and it sort of worked, but I realized I must be in a dream anyway.

I wasn't very lucid, because of the shoddy RCs I think, but I was with my dad, and I knew that it could be the real him in the dream world, so I told him I was in a dream, that we were in a dream. He said he knew. I asked him if he realized that that meant we could do anything, and he said no we can't (I think). I tried to break a glass window, but it didn't break. My dad said something about it, and I told him I could cut it with my fingers.

I put my finger to the glass and did a very shitty circle, cutting it through. I broke that part off, then broke off the rest mentally. My dad tried as well, but instead broke it physically when he was done. For some reason doing this interested me a lot, and after talking to him a little bit about dreams, I kept doing this with the windows until I lost lucidity and found myself back in the restaurant with my dad.

It was a FA, I told him I just had a dream, and he was in it. I asked him what he did in his dream. He said he was with me, but he was at our basement or something, and we were making holes in the tiling. He added some other info, about us both knowing it was a dream, and I concluded it was a shared dream, but not a very good connection.

I woke up, and fell back asleep.

I was in a different place in the restaurant, and I did another RC. Shoddy again, but I still realized I was dreaming. My dad was with me, and we were atop a spiral staircase, all white, with a very interesting curvy railing. I saw a baby girl sitting at the very end of the railing, and I decided to go grab her, I was about to slide to the bottom, when I FA'd again in the restaurant with my mom and dad.

I don't remember what happened after that, but after a minute or so I woke up IRL. It was very interesting, and I felt that my dad was actually there. It seems to me that I kept switching from the astral plane into my dream world, and that in the astral plane, RCs don't work as well, or the vividness throws me off, and I only was with my dad in the astral plane.

I'll ask my dad what he dreamed about and see if we made a connection, and I'll update this accordingly.

EDIT: I talked to him. He said it happened. He remembered a great deal more than I did. We also got high together, had sex with some people and he said We fell right after the glass building thing. That was when I lost lucidity, so I was probably a DC at that point, otherwise I would have flown, or at least remembered it from terror. He remembered nothing about a restaurant, he said that never happened. I find it pretty probable that I met up with him in the astral plane, and that the other parts where I wasn't lucid was in my inner dream world or something.

This is my first successful (remembered) shared dream.

08/09/10



I'm standing in the shadows, talking quietly with the owner of a tavern. I lean casually against the open door frame, and the owner seems nervous, as if he'd very much like to tell me to leave. I ask him for information on my target, an older man who knows secrets that someone is paying to keep hidden.

The front door slams open, and most of the bar turns to look. My target is standing at the center of attention, panting. He looks around nervously.

I put a finger to my lips, warning the owner to keep silent, and step back into the night. Remotely, I see the man look at the open side door, before shaking his head and descending the stairs at the center of the room. I walk into the bar, through the front door this time. The target turns around and eyes me suspiciously, but my dark brown cloak is unremarkable, and I'm making my way to the bar.

When he turns a corner, I'm down the stairs after him. I see him slip into the dormitories, the beds that the tavern rents out, and I enter the room after him. He's not there. Unconcerned, I head towards the bed that an old woman, who used to work for the tavern, said was his the last time he stayed here. I strip the bed and see subtle signs of stitching at the seams. I rip into the mattress, sending stuffing across the room, and taking what's hidden there.

The stack of papers is old, but well preserved. I focus on the title.

These are the carvings of the things I saw.

The rest of the information needs to be translated. I carefully place the manuscript in my bag and fasten it shut, slinging the bag across my shoulder.

The old man must have escaped through the Shadow Ways (portals?), but I have what I need. I walk down the hallway and find an exact copy of the room I just left. I think about searching it, but decide that the phenomenon is entirely normal, since this is a dream.

What one person will pay to keep hidden, others will go to any length to reveal. Curious and excited, I take the stairs to the main floor, ready to meet my contact.

Questions. Scare Factor: 2.

I didn't get to find out what the manuscript was, and I wasn't lucid even though I knew I was dreaming. What a frustrating ending.

After a long and strange dream (at one point a dog was insulting me calling me weak, so I grabbed it by the back of the neck and threw it out the window... those damn shit talking dogs), I began to lose my sense of sight and drift out of the dream world. That's when i said to myself: "Looks like I'm about to wake up, I'll just do a DEILD when I'm back in my bed." Then I paused for a bit, and thought: "Wait a second..." I became lucid at that point I started dream spinning, rubbing things around me, feeling the ground and any other method I could think of to help me cement my mind to my dream body; as I could actually feel my physical body lying in bed, so I was very close to waking up and reversing that process wasn't exactly easy. But it still worked and I gained my dream vision back, and began to observe my hands to further stabilize lucidity. Though my hands looked like holograms that were glitching out or something, words fail to describe how they looked... just strange (for those of you who've looked at your hands in a dream, you might now what I mean). I came to the conclusion that looking at my hands wasn't helping because they were just too unstable. I proceeded to practice some simple dream control, then I thought I'd try some simple magic to practice dream control a little bit more. So I looked at my right hand and concentrated on conjuring a fireball, a burst of flames consumed my hand and from the blaze a fireball shot out about six inches from my hand and sank back down to where it levitated about two inches from my hand. I tried to throw it, but when I tried to swing my arm everything slowed down like slow motion or something; the fireball left my hand and was going less then a mile per hour (similar to what you see projectiles do in The Matrix movies).

Looking back I see that when times slows down, it could be a sign of waking up because after everything slowed down my alarm went off.

09.08.2010

Running Killing (Non-lucid)

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID

I'm at the mall, it is a giant underground maze, teeming with hordes of people. I go inside and go underground. I'm looking for the arcade, I find something that looks like an arcade, but I heard there is a really nice arcade somewhere, this can't be it, can it?
It's like a giant Disney store. i see some games, but I have no quarters or my camera, so I leave. I'm able to find my way back out of the mall. Some kid at the arcade grabbed on of my buttons of my jacket, I grab him in a rage and smack him around a bit, security says they'll torment him for a bit longer when I leave. i thank them and tell them not to arrest him though.
Outside, it is early morning, cold, cloudy. Cops are moving past on cop elephants. I get out of there way warily. One stops right in my path and takes forever to move.
I'm going back to my car, over by college market. I start running, like a jog. I'm over towards that neighborhood, I see a beautiful dark haired woman out jogging, but shes dressed in a skirt for like a party or something.
I wave at her.
"<Thelemic>? No you're not <Thelemic>."
"Yes I am! I was waving at you."
We start talking on the sidewalk, somehow I pull of my moves and I'm holding her close.
Kissing her, her chest has tattoos. Shes up against me, I'm up against a car, we can feel the vibrations.
I get her to come with me instead of where she was going, we are going to get some drinks and have them at the park.
We meet up with Christian somehow. He falls and it looks like he broke his wrist.....it looks bad I see the elephant cops nearby, I tell Christian they'd probably give him a ride to the hospital, but he is healing at a freakish pace. He is all healed.
We are at the car. Getting ready to go and I see a man at the trunk of my car stealing my camping tent. He says "Going camping this weekend." He seems very satisfied with himself, I jump out of the car and unleash a string of violent obscenities at the man.

He takes off running and I give chase with a weapon I pulled out of my trunk (like a hex head screwdriver).
He drops the tent by the sidewalk and runs towards a house with its door open, his house.
I feel like he may be going for a gun inside. I catch him at the doorway and stab him with the screwdriver in the spot between the shoulder and the neck. It goes all the way in, more blood. I run off, grabbing the tent and run across the street. As I'm shoving the tent in the trunk, I tell the girl "We're going." In a serious voice.
She understands and gets in with Christian.
I jump in the drivers seat and struggle with the keys momentarily. We drive off. The man is not following us. As we head towards the park, I start wondering how I'm going to get out of drinking and driving, as we are going to the park to drink and make out, I'm not going to be able to tell this hot girl afterwards "nahh I can't drive you home now.." It'll never work and I don't like it. Def Leppard - Animal is playing on my blackberry and headphones, I plug it in to the car stereo so we can all listen.

09.08.2010

In the House of Dogs (Non-lucid)

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID

I'm in a beautiful mansion, that is full of dogs.
There are girls here and they are super goth dominatrix type satan worshiper girls. They want to spill blood for the devil and for some reason i want to impress them, when it comes to my turn to cut myself I tell one of them to cut my eyelid off. She cuts off part of my eyelid, it hurts like hell and I now look like a freak. After a while I decide I want my eye back to normal, I ask one of the goth girls if she still has my eyelid. I get it back and am going to try to sew it back on, or glue it on with eyelash glue.

I'm looking for a bathroom with good light to do this, but there are giant dogs everywhere and they won't leave me alone. I also keep dropping the eyelid and I get very sad everytime because its so hard to find I think I lost it everytime. I see a tattooed mini elephant. I'm reminded of bob fossil for some reason and I say something about the little hand -foot man. The tattooed elephant has shapeshifted into a humanoid. I comment that I like it's tattoos, it thanks me.

07.08.2010

At the South Pole (Non-lucid)

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID

It's new years eve, there is a big party going on, the girls are doing giant piles of coke. I'm smoking a rolled cigg. I keep setting it on the ground in between drags. I start to notice my mouth is all kinds of numb. I look on the ground and there is lots of cocaine I ask my friend if she spilled some coke, she says yes. I scoop it all up and walk off to find a spot to make a line. Outside there are still lots of people partying at the park, gangbanger types.

I see a man falling from a plane into the ocean over the south pole.
I wake up in the ocean, it's night time, it's dark and I don't know which way is up.
I finally surface and we are right by a long wall, like a big building.
It has windows up high. So I think we should be ok.
The water is freezing, but we swim on down the length of the wall..
This place is familiar.
I remember being here before and finding out that it's an abandoned natural history museum.
Inside there are a few people that are really androids. i talk to one of them, he's oblivious to the fact that this place has been abandoned since the 60s.

I notice that there are lots of crap newer video games in the pizza parlour, and two cabaret games. I don't have my camera/blackberry.
Something fishy is going on, if they had new games brought in, there must be a way for us to get out.

**********

In space somewhere, we are fighting against droids. I come around the corner and fire my lasers and rockets at them but I'm low on ammunition. It doesn't seem to affect them. I parlay with the closest droid who says this is a hospital. I tell him I'm a medical droid in need of repairs. We follow him down a little ways down, there are about 10-15 arcade games lined against the wall....two neo-geos with samurai shodown iii right next to each other. Most of the games are in bad disrepair, broken control panel overlays, missing buttons, broken coin doors, etc. One 50 cent game has 17 credits on it. I comment on this.

When the droid doc comes I show it my mosquito bite, but also tell it ive been having chest pains and other symptoms.
it gives me a shot and tells me to wait.
I can hear the Lower Class Brats playing Background Music with different words slightly. There are some biker/punks in the area.

04.08.2010

On the Road to Santa Cruz (Non-lucid)

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID

I decided to set out on a journey to Santa Cruz. I will take the freeway. Before I leave I screwed a folding door to the frame at my moms house, but I forgot to remove it. I remember this as i am already quite well on my way, if I go back to fix it, i'll lose a lot of time..I decide to leave it.
I realize I didn't bring a jacket, luckily I find one of my jackets on the trail, my denim skins jacket. It has a lot of cool patches and buttons that I don't remember putting on..
the freeway to Santa Cruz is deserted, usually there are lots of cars on it and I have to stick to the dirt road along side the freeway. The freeway is closed for construction or something so I'm skateboarding along it at a leisurely pace.

I pulled some skateboarding ads of my wall to show Talitha. One was a Real ad with a picture of me at the bar...

(a few days ago)

I am in the bathroom, looking in the mirror. WTF. I have no reflection!

Bobby (DJ Sabertooth) appears in the mirror.

I get confused. He copies me and giggles.

DUDE IT'S ME!

Oh, shit. I knew that.

"I am always with you, man. Seriously. Check it: I can be in more than one place at the same time. It's fucking amazing! Anyway... We should hang out more on the Moon. Tell everyone to come. I love you!"