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Narcissism and botched summonings ahead. Still, every lucid's fun and this was a good reminder not to be too casual with details in dream control situations!

Color legend: Non-dream Dream Lucid

Lucid #111: Vanity at The Doppelganger Waterpark

I have a false awakening. Faint morning light filters in through the window. I wonder whether it's too bright to get back to sleep. A bedside clock says that it's 5:00 AM. It seems too bright and too late to have a lucid dream. I remember the micro-lucid from earlier in the morning and feel disappointed that I didn't hit a real one. (I really did have a micro-lucid earlier, as well as an earlier false awakening.)

I get up to use the restroom and notice that I'm not in my usual bedroom but rather on the first floor of a building -- a hotel perhaps? I feel like I'm awake, but the bathroom is just... so different. I'm dreaming.

As I leave the bathroom, I hear Wife beginning to stir. She's muttering something but I can't make it out. The morning light makes it seem urgent to get started with my goals, so I phase out through an external wall, my head and shoulders passing through a window. I end up in a fenced, grassy yard with a circular stone table surrounded by simple stone benches.

My strategy for this dream is to forget the meeting location for now and just try to summon NewArtemis directly. I walk toward the yard's open gate, holding my hand behind me as I go. "[NewArtemis], grab onto my hand." No good. I have the sense that I did it all wrong. Stop asking. I sort of try again but my level of intent is poor and nothing happens.

As I exit the yard, I'm distracted from the summon by a mirror hanging on a brick wall to my left. I check my reflection and see that I'm wearing a pair of jeans without a shirt. I vainly check myself out and notice that I'm less in shape than I remember being -- torso a little smoother, face a little puffier. I start worrying that I've let myself slip in waking life and try to remember whether that's true. It suddenly occurs to me that this is probably the most pathetic, narcissistic thing I've ever wasted lucid dream time on in my entire life.

I walk further along the grass until I come to a large, packed pool that's being rocked by gentle waves, almost like it's a half-activated water park wave pool. I notice my friend "SC" playing with a young child (too young to be one of his sons). About twelve feet to his right, I see another SC! The doppelganger smiles and gives me a nod of acknowledgment.

As I continue along the pool, I see my high school friend "LM". And just as with the other friend, not far from her is another doppelganger. Again, the doppelganger looks my way and smiles. The smile seems genuine rather than threatening so even though I find it a little weird, I'm not too troubled by anything that I'm seeing.

The water makes me think of Angel Falls. Okay, new plan: summon Art while on the move and dash to Angel Falls for Task of the Year. My hope is that if I'm very casual about the summon it'll just work. I reach my hand behind me and say, "[NewArtemis], Angel Falls is just up ahead." I feel a hand grasp mine and I look back to confirm that it's Art. But when I do, I see that the hand is sticking straight up out of the water. The geometry of all this strikes me as strange. How is their arm so long that they can still be submerged and grab onto me?

As I'm thinking this, the person floats up out of the water, still gripping my hand. She's a complete stranger -- blonde, early 20s, fair-skinned, slightly heavier build. She's wearing a black one-piece swimsuit. "Who are you?" I ask, and her only reply is to half-smile and turn away. I notice that her teeth have a very mild yellow/brownish stain to them.

"I'm going to change you into [NewArtemis]. Okay?" I'm not trying to ask permission so much as... explain what's about to happen? There's no reply. I look off to the side to make the transformation easier, but the dream ends before I can take this any further.

Good morning, everybody.

Dream #1

I was in a house all by myself. The house was one story. The living room was huge, but it was extremely cluttered, as if laundry and blankets were strewn everywhere. It was early morning and dark.

My mother and the rest of the family had left the house some time ago. They had probably left for at least a few days. I had the house all to myself. I didn't live here with my family, but I was "in town" for a few days.

I walked into a bedroom which was just off from the living room and right next to the front door of the house. The room was really small, maybe twice as big as the small bed inside it. It was also extremely cluttered.

I may have heard a car arriving outside. I knew it was my father. I think my mom and the rest of my family had left because they knew my dad was coming for a visit and they wanted to avoid him.

I walked out into the living room through some kind of thin sheet that was now hanging over the doorway to the bedroom. My dad was already in the house. I was wearing a red and white trucker cap. My dad may have been wearing one as well.

My dad may have asked me why I was up so early. I said, "I always get up this early. This is when I go to work. In fact, I'm heading to work right now."

My dad and I were looking toward a huge sliding glass door to the backyard. But our view to the backyard was blocked by a thin, yellow curtain and possibly also a white dry-erase board.

My dad asked if I always go to work this early. I told him I did, and that I tried to work pretty late as well. My dad said, "Well, my habit has always been to do Fridays only from nine to five. I thought you might do the same thing. At least on Fridays."

Dream #2

I was in a grocery store, getting checked out. The front of the store had big windows running along the wall, looking out on a bright, sunny parking lot. I felt like something, almost like a big piece of machinery, was behind me, making it very uncomfortable for me to stand in the checkout line.

A thin, Latina girl just a bit shorter than I was bagging my groceries. She asked me at some point about my work. I was away from work and I needed to get back. I may actually have been picking up supplies for some kind of work party. The girl may have asked me if my work was really strict with how long I was away.

I told the girl about my hours and what I did at work. She had bagged my stuff and was now walking out of the store with me, helping me take my bags to the car.

I was out in the parking lot. I may have been by myself. A few kids whom I may have thought of as a group of kids I'd taken out on volunteer projects came walking up. I was a little shy, but I called out to them. We kept talking, but for some reason I kept heading to my car, which was a few aisles away.

I now saw that my sister was among the kids. I couldn't see my sister or the kids anymore, but I was "talking" with my sister. She told me she would try to be back at home for whatever party I was throwing. But she wasn't sure she could make it. But if she didn't make it I shouldn't be upset. Because she -----

Dream #3

I was in a hotel lobby. The interior was small, but furnished with nice wood and chairs. But the light was a terribly drab fluorescent. I sat at some couch.

I got a call from my grandmother. She said she had prepared some form for me so I could stay at this hotel for a kind of long period of time. I now had the "form" in my right hand. It was on an iPad. The form was black with white lettering. The blanks, when not written in, were an orange-fadey color.

My grandma said she'd filled in a lot of the form. I noticed she had filled in my social security number. I was kind of surprised by that. But my grandma said, "Yeah, of course I have your social security number. I can get that if I want. I can even have them give me your social security card if I want. It comes with being your grandmother."

I felt slightly inconvenienced at having to be at this hotel, but I figured I'd stay here anyway, since my grandma had done so much to secure a place for me.

But either I or my grandma pointed out that the forms would not be finalized for a while. I told my grandma, "If thats's the case, I need to go somewhere else until the forms are finalized. These people don't like having me here in the first place. And having me here without my permanent forms finalized is just an excuse for them to give me a bad time."

I spoke with my grandma about where I should go while I wait. My view was now of a map. It was apparently a map of Colorado, where I grew up. I kept travelling south on a red road on the map, through a number of towns notated by circles. The color of the map changed from pale lime green to yellow.

I kept telling my grandma I couldn't stay in any of the towns my vision passed through, as the people in those towns all hated "people like me." I eventually went south of Colorado's border, which was much more jagged and rounded than it is IWL. There were three towns just south of the border. I may have figured one of those towns would be safe for me to stay in.

WAKING LIFE DREAMING LUCID
BOLD IF IT FEELS PARTICULARLY SIGNIFICANT

FFEDCIDD Practice
FFEDCIDD = Face, Feel, Expand, Dissipate, Coalesce, Integrate, Decide, Do

Jealousy roaring up. Expanded about a foot from my body. specks of contained heat (but not touchable?) It was like an insulation, a bit spongy. Jealousy felt bizarre - that might have been the first time I’ve really let myself feel it. I have memories of stuffing it down because it was unattractive.

A loose approximation
(more like just a pretty thing that had similar colors)
by fleicap

Under it a sadness centered in my gut, heart, and throat. The sadness (or maybe my mental reflections on it) brought me to memories of soothing myself as a child by crying into a mirror alone. I feel a lot of resistance to posting that little intimate detail, so maybe forcing myself is the way to go. Gah, I’m not always this serious, an insecure voice inside me is sharply whining and pushing.