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Date: 08 Nov

Wbtb: latte (1/3), 34 mg

LD: I suddenly find myself in our living room and it is dark. My initial thought is that this is quite a bad location for any TOTY tasks. I take some time to fit in instead of rushing like crazy. There are creepy noises coming from somewhere and I don't feel very comfortable with that, so decide to stay where I am. My hands find the tablet and I use it to light around. I think I am also seeing the HI lights swirling around the room at some point.

I open the browser and decide to type dreamviews, but as soon as I type "dre" the keyboard changes and I give up. Then think that it will be really cool to play some music. I tap a couple of buttons like the music app and a song starts playing, there's also something on the screen like album picture. I expected to hear some cool dream techno but it's a nice rock song. The only problem is the sound is not loud enough for my preferences. I want the sound to blast all around me or at least to be a bit louder. My tech instinct is to increase the volume on the tablet and I keep on pressing the button but no result.

I decide to check out how the other rooms look, carrying the tablet to light the way. There are 4 plastic and paper shopping bags in front of the entrance door. I also take a peek in the bedroom and see bf asleep. I concentrate and see a sleeping body where I should be. This feels a bit creepy and I quickly walk away, trying not to wake myself up (also flashing with the tablet in my own face).

I go back to the living room, now contemplating an exit. The most efficient way seems the window. I face the it, wondering whether to directly phase though it or try to open it, being a bit concerned that phasing might make me end up in the void, like a few days ago. I do a mix of both, half phase, half open the window which is somewhat stuck.

The outside world is someplace unknown to me, but I don't pay attention to that. I end up on a balcony and try to figure out how to get down from here. There are kids playing on the street, and if I correctly remember the trees' leave are already yellow? I shout something at the kids about them helping me out, more to feel confident that asking for help, then I do the swing forward and end up on the street. Not sure if I used a tree branch or just the habitual move.

Before I go anywhere, I take a last look at our place. The window is now open, and we are dangerously close to the ground, making it possible for someone to climb back there. I briefly wonder if it is possible that the dream body actually has opened a real window, then dismiss the idea. There are three kids running around, one wears a strange purple clay-like mask on his face. I tell him to behave, there was something that he did. Then, I think I asked them where the wall of China is, but no reply. The kids were pretty independent and lively DCs though.

I decide to walk around and look for the wall of China. Everything is extremely vivid and stable. It is midday, feels like early fall too. There's so much detail. I see a street name on one of the nearby buildings and try to read it but then change my mind. This time, I decide that I will allow the dream to gently lead me to any desired TOTY objects, rather than me forcing things to appear. As I am scanning the surroundings for something appropriate to use, I notice this church on one of the streets. It's made of pink sandstone, very beautiful. The whole building is absolutely perfect and so elaborate that I just can't believe my mind can create so much and correct detail. Still checking out what's around me, I make sure to also look for any tall buildings that can fit another TOTY. Nothing too tall though.

I turn right and explore the other street, looking for the wall of china or any elements that might help get there. There are rail tracks in front of what I think is near our place and also a pretty large and quite beautiful train station, its facade is made of bricks with the same pinkish color. I decide to go back, looking for greenery in the other direction. Instead of greenery or the street where I came from, I now find myself facing rail tracks again and a number of heavy trains are passing by. As I wait for them to go away and evaluate the terrain and how hard it will be to cross all these rails, I think it might be a good idea to rub my hands and remind myself that this is a dream. I am casually walking around, rubbing my hands, but the dream already seems out of fuel and I gradually wake up.

I am supposed to journal, but fall back to non-ld sleep instead.

Right. I am way behind with journalling. In the meantime, got mostly short lds and finally a long one today (will post separately).

Date: 1 Nov

Combo: SJW, B6, p.oil cap, latte

It's been around two months since the last time I took this combo. This time, I found the dreams before the wbtb very emotionally charged and not with pleasant emotions. It was mentally exhausting.

I do a quick wbtb and go back to bed repeating the mantras. An hour passes by where I thought I was awake but actually I was in some sort of deep sleep. Can't recall thinking or dreaming anything. I take a couple mins to concentrate on having an ld and fall asleep.

LD: From the darkness, the scene begins to form around me and I start walking briskly to allow myself to get in properly. I am on the street in some neighborhood. As I examine the surroundings, I see a chimp in the yard across the street. Cool! I remember that I was supposed to turn into a gorilla for the NY task, so having a point of reference for the transition is very welcome. My thoughts and emotions make the chimp stand on its feet and beat its chest or something like that.

The dream is kind of unstable and as I look around, I see the chimp suddenly vanish in front of my eyes. It quickly fades away to become transparent, where only the contours can be seen, then these disappear as well. I want the chimp to reappear and look in another direction. Behind the fence of a close by yard, there are now a number of bear cubs and as I am staring at them they quickly increase in numbers. The whole yard is now filled with bear cubs, maybe 15-20 of them. I look towards what I feel is the city center, hoping to see a tall building, but there are only 5- story blocks here. There's this gut feeling that I shouldn't have started changing the dream so early on as this is causing too much instability, but it's already too late. I wake up.

I do another quick and rather sloppy attempt to have an ld, but it seems that I fall into unmemorable sleep again.

4 Nov

From scratch short ld in the living room. High instability, decided to do yoga - handstand but lost the feel of my hands and dream collapsed.

5 Nov

Stable, vivid, somewhat unpleasant atmosphere. Recognized frequency of objects (toilets) as DS. Decided to leave the place by phasing through a mirror. Imagined Egypt behind and phased but ended in the void. Shortly felt warmth and some sand around but then continued floating forwards in the dark void. Minor dream paralysis (in the void) while trying to rub hands.

Date: 25th Aug

Pre bed: Gingko, Q10, peppermint oil capsule

Total sleep time: 7 1/2 hrs

Dream quality and recall: Vivid, bright colors, some positive moments, some annoying ones, evading recall

Fragment: Some kind of reddish cliffs (similar to AF, but no water)

Fragment: We are in school and there is some activity all of us are participating in. There are mostly sweaters on the desks with numbers on each pile. Each student is assigned a number and we are supposed to take the pile with our number somewhere.

Dream: I meet my special friend and he is very friendly. We sit somewhere and he tells me all kinds of details about his life. Later on, I am at our old home and I can see him in the building in front of ours as he calls me on the phone. I pick up and my voice is barely coming out, I excuse myself but I know the reason is that I am feeling this strange way again...We arrange to meet.

I wake up super happy, but sleepy and decide I will just review in head instead of taking notes.

Dream: I am with my friend again. He is involved with an organization that brings poachers to the top of a hill, but the activity stops after they are discovered. There are no consequences for him. Later we are somewhere talking and he tells me he is working for some sort of zoo. I can't believe it! I actually think this must be fate that he is working for a zoo and I like animals so much. As he tells me about the zoo, I begin seeing images of animals, he says they have over a hundred pandas there and I reply that's impossible, then contemplate on the structure of the place.

We go in this place which has a classical history exhibition. There are huge statues of Greek gods and special effects in each hall. The two I remember are different type of rain that is falling down in the rooms, one next to a statue of Zeus. I worry about my hairstyle due to the rain. We continue our tour and my bf appears to my left. My friend is holding my hand and I wonder about this, he has a gf and we are very good friends in dreams. Three of us stop in a corridor and my friend makes some remarks about us that seem to make my bf jealous. He also comments on his temper. I didn't expect my friend to behave like this and move closer to my bf, each guy is separated by his own window frame.

Fragment: I am in front of grandma and bf's mom who looks like a mix of a teacher of mine and unknown people is recommending some dates for me to travel. I don't want to do this. There was something else as well, I can't remember. My classmate appears and makes a few jokes that improve my mood. Then we are all supposed to listen to the anthem but I couldn't care less. People disapprove of my behavior.

Dream: FA, I am journalling about the previous dream, trying to put the dates from the previous dream down, but the calendar is missing the dates. In the meantime, bf is behind me reading the journal and I feel a bit embarrassed.

Dream: Grandma is sleeping and I am sleeping on her, she changes positions, and I am careful not to wake her up. I have a look at her legs and think about how well she always looked. Then see some veins and other stuff and wonder about age. There is some sort transparent plastic bra/shirt that is filling with blood and I tell grandma who is now awake to take it off. My dad comes to help drain the blood off the device. It looks more like passata and we get into a discussion about what exactly is going on. We have to smell the stuff, now in a cup to confirm what it is, it smells like chicken broth.

LD: I am in my other grandma's kitchen and become lucid. There's a smart looking DC, blond hair, bright clothes, and I say a few words to him. My mind is kind of foggy as I can't remember any tasks I am supposed to be doing. I ask him for help with advanced TOTM and he looks pretty confident and starts walking around supposedly to show me what I should do. I can't remember the advanced task at all! I rely on him to tell me and he says something like "fire". Hmmm, I know there was something related to fire, but still can't remember, was it burn someone's house down or what? I am not sure I want to do this.

Anyways, I move to the next room, which exists only in dreams, it's full of brightly colored objects and number of DCs but I don't take a closer look. I finally remember I have to do the three step task for the competition. Phase. No, interact with DC, ok, already did that. Next one is phase, keep your eyes open. There is a wall but I don't want to go through it as I may end up in the void, so I decide to go through the glass door just next to it. The patterns on the door are such that one only vaguely sees the room and stuff behind it. Keep the eyes open, I remind myself and push forward. As I do, the blurred shapes behind the glass door become sharper in front of my eyes as I get in the room. Absolutely cool effect, I am thinking! I recall CL's enhancing dream vividness tech too, but am not sure how to proceed about it. The dream is quite vivid and stable anyways.

Now in the room, I see two Korean women reading a newspaper. I have a look at what's written there and think about how I am going to describe it. It looks like Korean, yet it isn't as the letters as different. I am beginning to feel exhausted, some sort of weakness plus heaviness in the head, so decide to move on. What was I supposed to do next? Advanced summon, I am thinking about summoning something extraordinary. I am looking out the window while I do this, see the skyline of some unknown city. The idea was to summon Angel Falls, but I feel like dream control is very hard in this place. Yet, the moment I think about the waterfall, right in front of my eyes and in the distance of the city appears a large structure of falling water. I concentrate on it and start manipulating it to make it Angel Falls but get something like a long protruding towards me half of a bridge and the water turns to shredded material that is waving in the wind in my direction.

I am still not sure whether that counts as advanced summon, so look in the other direction where there are yellow trees and see if I can make some special effects appear there. I almost zoom out of the room as I do that, but the dream seems to be fading away so I go back the way I entered and head to the living room. This place still has the layout of my grandma's place. As I go down the corridor, I hear a roar-like sound and think to self "Nooo", anticipating an unpleasant surprise. I cautiously approach the living room only to see an old slightly overweight Thai man trying to fall asleep on the couch. His wife is also there talking to him. He tells me something about me having eat to the fish he cooked and being offended. There's a small piece of fish next to a piece of carrot on the chair and I taste it, tastes like poached salmon. I then go into the kitchen thinking what to do now, having the impression this dream is generally very stable and control might be hard. I compare this to sivanson's cities in the astral and wonder if this is something similar where they might have imposed restrictions on gravity. The dream slowly fades.

I wake and rush to take notes.

Date: 11 Aug

Pre bed: 100mg B6

Total sleep time: 6 1/2 hrs?

Natural wakes: many, got up on 5 to pee, drink water, take notes. Also lots of micro-awakenings where it took me some time to fall asleep. Noises from neighbors and early morning arrangements of others woke me up too.

Dream quality and recall: Very vivid dreams, some stability issues. Recall was challenging, forgot two lds, but then I recalled them, pffuuu. One suspicious also.

Early dream (+2 hrs after bed): I had the impression there might have been something lucid here, but sleep was so deep, I have no idea, it was quite vivid though.

Dream: some kind of tower, bf, something forbidden? (why didn't I write a whole sentence?)

Dream: this was a crazy dream, not very pleasant but interesting. The part I remember involved me getting to a window, where some kind of deadly poisonous gas is working. I am unprepared (compared to others) to deal with this gas and do some maneuvers to avoid it, while it's coming straight at me. I think I am trying to open the window as well. I notice that small wounds begin to appear on my hands from the gas. For once, they almost look ok, not too bad, but I am naturally worried about them. At the same time, I am fascinated that I feel no pain despite my exposure to the gas. (That was pretty close!)

DILD1: I go out in some kind of yard and want to sit on the stone wall. There are two teenagers there that plan to make out, so I move not to interrupt them and go sit on another fence. Soon they go back to the entrance and I hear an electricity shock. I think that a bad guy has done something to them and is now coming in the yard, so I look for a place to hide. I evaluate a few hideouts but decide I will be discovered so better leave now. The main idea is to get as far away as possible, while still able to observe the guy.

As I make my way through yard after yard, I get this familiar feeling. I have been running like this in a lot of my dreams. Semi-lucid, I continue on my way, climbing fences, going far enough. Then I finally reach a block, which I start to climb as if it is a tree. No matter where I step or reach there is always something to hold on to, like a balcony, the window etc. I finally reach the top of the building, which is like 5-6 floors and sit there to contemplate. It is not very easy to keep balance as I am holding on to some unstable part of the building. At this point, I also reach a much better clarity of mind. I look around and see all kinds of junk around me. I either become worried about stability and the dream becomes unstable or the other way around. I wait and things improve somewhat and I get the weird idea that I will turn this building top into the top of Angel Falls then jump, but I feel the need to have something stable below me to start with. It's a bit like I am sitting on a wobbly chair on top of pile of crap right now.

I look to my left and see that a beautiful river is flowing through the nearby part of neighborhood. There is also a small waterfall in the middle of it, too small, but inspiring enough. I want to go down there, I have no idea how and where I but get and reach to this branch and once again use the tree branch swinging method of moving. I swing forward and land exactly where I wanted to - down where the river is. I start thinking about turning this into Angel Falls. The river starts to change and at some point I find myself right in the middle of it, observing how the now dark water flows down a slope. There are dark rocks as well, and the current is way too fast, so I feel kind of uncomfortable being in the water. Somehow though I am dry and not moving with the current? This is not quite like what it is supposed to be and I concentrate on the landscape to cut off the water and make it flow into an abyss just ahead of me. Despite my efforts the river changes just a bit. I get it, it is just not working right now and I also become tired so give up. The thought quickly flashes that I might try to turn the end of the river flow into a beach, but now lack the mood for that. I begin reviewing other tasks I have memorized but the the dream ends just as I go through them.

I am now in my bed and a bit pissed off that the dream didn't just continue into another scene, and I have so much awareness of my body. I nevertheless remain still, nervously waiting until something like a proper DEILD happens.

DILD2: The beginning of this is very vague. I think I just appeared somewhere and held on to this DC for stabilization. The next thing I know, the dream is much more stable and I am walking down the street with the male DC to my left, holding his hand in a friendly way (I think this is the stabilization residual). I am quite happy and for some reason conclude this is Xanous. I can't remember much of this part of the dream, just that we walk down the street of a European looking town, talking about something. OB is also involved either in my thoughts or mentioned in the conversation.

We are facing a closed metal gate plus fence and the male DC turns to the left to go the part where there is no fence at all. I then tell him, why don't we just phase through the fence, this is a dream after all. So, we go back and walk straight through the fence. I easily pass as if there is nothing there at all, but the DC has a bit of difficulty going through, he emerges but it looks like it has caused him some discomfort. I feel guilty for making him do this and begin apologizing. He doesn't look much like Xanous at this point - brown hair and wider face, but it's him in my mind. He seems quite independent for a DC, but that may be just me. We then continue our walk through the city.

At some point, I feel the dream is beginning to destabilize, but I don't want to share it with Xanous as not to mess his stability or something like that. I just walk further forward, rubbing my hands and hop walking for a while. The dream stabilizes and I am really happy about it. He is to my left again, this time with copper hair and tall. I start talking and notice how clear my voice sounds. But even as I talk, I almost immediately forget everything I say. The only thing I remember is "do you think this will work out" and point at me and him? Then I feel embarrassed this might be understood the wrong way and add "I mean this shared dreaming thing". I finally remember that I was supposed to do a gesture and share the passcode but before I could do anything the dream ends.

Micro-ld: I am back in a town of my past, in the place I used to live. Bf is also there. The thought that I am not supposed to be there anymore crosses my mind, but I come up with the explanation that I am now just visiting the town? I look around in the room and conclude that everything looks like it is real life and not like in dreams where there are all kinds of objects that don't really belong to this room, even though it really doesn't. I see that the windows are very dirty and this makes me think that the neighbors have been throwing drinks from McDonalds at the windows. Soon I see the neighbors throwing drinks. I want to threaten them with the police, but fear revenge, so decide just to call the cops to get them. I also complain to bf about it.

It looks like we are leaving the place next day (Sunday) and I need to take some stuff. I can't remember much detail here, but I look around the place, and there are neatly arranged flowers in the yards nearby, which look similar to dreams about the place I had and not real life.

Then I am in the city center, maybe doing last min shopping, I have no idea. On one of the familiar streets, I look inside a strangely shaped car and see a guy with semi-finished and a purple? demonic face. He gives me an evil look and I become lucid and begin to sway the car back and forth, my intention is to lift it and move it, which I do. I make it turn over and leave it like that for a moment, thinking about some more mischief. In the meantime it changes color and shape. I have the strong desire to try to lift the car as high as possible and then send it flying in the air like a balloon. I concentrate on it and lift it quite high but there is some resistance, I send thoughts that all of the people on the street are also doing this task which makes it easier. I am holding the car in the air for quite a while, until it becomes harder, but I still keep my gaze on it. It has become a round large piece of smashed black metal that is dissolving /dematerializing in the air. Witnessing the dissolution of the object is very interesting, it happens gradually and the object loses its physical properties, becoming more of an energy and I also see aura-like glow around the edges - green and red. The dream ends.

I wake up, think briefly about the ld and then fall asleep which makes me forget it. Noises, distractions and final sleep attempts.

Micro-ld: I can't remember the beginning of the dream/let. There is a very interesting sun clock in the sand of some sort of a pot in the park. I am playing with the sand, thinking about lucidity and stabilization? Then I continue walking down the lane when a DC guy looks me with some sort of irritation and I become lucid. I realize that I am finally in the dream as if just entered a dreamlet and feel very floating/unstable. For some reason, I keep repeating my DSs as a mantra and also grab the guy's T-shirt and move along with him, but he wants to move on his own so he is staring at me annoyed. I let him go and see my mom ahead of me, carrying flashlight which is on and the light looks more like the ray of sun shining on all the dust in the park. Very cool effect. The dream falls apart and I wake up.

Comments: I am happy on this occasion there wasn't too much B6 related agression with the exception of a few bad looks from DCs which helped me achieve lucidity.

19.06.2011

Lucid 5 (WILD)

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID

It was night-time, I'm in my room staring out the window, I felt something come up from behind me. I phased through the window/wall and then landed outside in my backyard, facing my bedroom window. I wasn't wearing shoes, I could feel the grass under my feet. The window was bigger than normal. I started to lose clarity and stated rubbing my hands but everything was still going blurry. Oh right- I looked at my hands while running them, then dream began stabilising again.
I flew up over the roof and phased down from it, back into my room. I was sloowly losing clarity. I wanted to ground my senses, and having read Hyu's dream journals, I materialised an ipod from my pockets and put my headphones on. I said out loud "play". It started playing some Senses Fail.
I teleported into my kitchen and grabber a pear out of a box, I didn't even reach fully into the box. Taking a bite of the pear, it was sweet. I started walking back towards the bathroom and expected my dg to be there. It didn't work. I closed and reopened the door, attempting to make my DG appear again. Nada.
I walked back into my room and noticed that my ipod had stopped playing. I lightly layed a finger on it and said "Beast" (an artist). Music started playing, but it wasn't BEAST (maybe it's cause i've only recently started listening to their songs). My girlfriend called and I lost alot of lucidity. She asked me about my day of school.
"What?"
"How was your day at school?"
"I wasn't at school.."
Then I was somehow talking to my friend John about a new Eminem song and how it felt like it related to his father.
I looked up at my stereo system, but in it's place was a fanXvending machine.
I thought "Why don't I put some water in there.."

Lucid~

Woke up in my room as usual and then it was dark and I was pissed. So I cast a Harry Potter spell and the light turned on. I then warped through my door and tried to fly away but I floated and landed on a rock. I then proceeded into moving into the dark woods and a weird person
with a strange costume on came up and said something then I woke up.

Short but sweet ;x

I also had a normal dream about rotten peaches.

Confusing, multiple versions of the same dream again but managed a lucid. False awakening too. Enjoy. Oh and I took Choline + Galantamine a few hours after first falling asleep.

Cold Feet (non-lucid)

I enter my house and take off my shoes. I ball up my socks and place them inside. Wait, it is no longer my house. We moved out. I go up upstairs and see a scantily clad women cleaning the bathroom. I can't let her see me. I sneak into my room and see clothes stacked on the bed a floor. The closet and drawers are cleaned out. Posters overturned on the bed. I sneak back downstairs, grab my shoes, and head out back. Leaving the socks. It is snowing.

I walk down the alley and there is this garage without a door. I go inside and there is a black leather sofa and some people through tinted glass. A girl rides by on a bike and I follow her. I pas a woman that says something about pregnancy and veins. The garage opens up to this sort of backstage area like I am going to a concert. End.

Cold Feet: The Lucid (dild)

I am lucid in my house. I don't remember how or why. I am upstairs and again there is a woman in the bathroom. I forget all about my goals and decide to kill her. I go into a bedroom and into a drawer. “There will be knife in here.” I think. I open the drawer and dig beneath the clothes to find a knife. It is weird. It is a Swiss thing with drill bits and cooking tools and all kinds of things I don't need. Fine, I'll just strangle her. “That should help stabilize anyways.” I think. I go inside but she is gone. I feel a cold breeze from the open window.

I leave the bathroom and search for the women. I go into the attic bedroom but it is empty. I look in the mirror and see I've got this crazy dragon tattoo on my bicep (none irl). I examine it, taking the dream rather slowly.



I go downstairs and into my living room. I phase through the window (something I've gotten good at, I'll do it again.) I am on my porch.

It is still snowing. Snow covers the ground. Bro and a co-worker shovel snow. I then see my neighbors' house...

and through the window covered with Christmas decorations I see my neighbor and his daughter sitting down to eat a nice, peaceful meal. “Jill” I yell. Nothing happens. I phase through, crash through their window and onto the table. I jump down and try to Force Push/TK him away. He smiles and says “I bet you just need to play Whiplash.” and smiles again. I have just enough time to think of the song before waking up.

Whiplash by Metallica

Notes: Yesterday I had multiple versions of the shark dream. Tonight, I had multiple versions of Cold Feet. At one point, in one dream, the scantily clad women cleaning the bathroom was my mother. Yikes. And I was on a cell phone or something. Confusing. After the lucid there was an FA. I was sitting on my porch watching the snow. I went inside any my family was there talking about dogs.

Frags:

I found some work equipment in the trunk of a car, there was something about the Nintendo 3DS, and the police were there.