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The night before last I didn't recall my dreams at all. Last night I can only recall a couple of fragments.

Fragment One: Playing Skylanders with my son, and found an area he had not unlocked yet. Got to show him all the secret areas in the level, like hidden passages behind bookshelves and stuff. It was awesome, but then I woke up thinking how off secret bookshelf doors were for a game like that, lol. Probably why I remember it so well.

Fragment Two: I woke up with the line Mischief managed stuck in my head. I don't recall the dream, but wondered if I had been dreaming of Harry Potter stuff, lol.

Fragment Three: I was returning from a field trip of some sort for a college class. In the dream my husband was part of it (he's never even been to college, so that was really odd, lol) as were a bunch of my friends from college that I haven't spoken to in years. I entered the college building through the library, and noticed I had an ass load of books and my daughter and son that I was trying to carry. I find a rolly chair, and I sit in it, putting the books in my lap and sitting my daughter on top of the books. My son holds my other hand and pulls us through the library. I briefly find myself searching the crowd for a man with long dark hair, but don't see him so I relax a bit disappointed. In the class room my son lets go of my hand and runs to his father, and my daughter jumps out of my lap to do the same. When she jumps, the books fall and I stumble around trying to pick them up without getting out of the rolly chair. When they're picked up I roll over to a table with my husband, and old friend from college, and two red haired twin boys I don't recognize as someone from RL but knew in the dream. I drop the books in the table, then stand up and tell my husband that I've got to take the chair back to the library where I got it from. He says he'll watch the kids, so I take the chair back and notice the long haired man isn't there still. I set the chair down at a computer and go back to the class room. IN the classroom I make the comment that the twins look like Weasleys and I need to take a picture with my phone and send it to my best friend A, because she'd love it! I think I might have tried to joke around and call them Fred and George but then I woke up.

I "wake up" in my mom's house. Immediately I know I am dreaming but I am not completely lucid because I feel like I still live there and fell asleep in my room there (even though I have already moved out). Everything is so realistic that I think I am actually there. I walk to my bedroom and can see the shape of my body beneath the sheets of the bed. I consider the possibility that I might actually be in my "spirit body" looking at my physical self. (After waking up I now know that wasn't the case.) So..Just in case I actually am, I protect my body by casting a white light to surround it. I feel like I did a good job so I walk downstairs into the kitchen. I think about this being a good opportunity to make an experiment. I grab some red oven mittens out of a drawer and put them in the oven. I take a dish towel laying on the counter, and put it on the exercise bike in the living room. I wonder if I am actually doing this and tell myself that when I actually wake up I am going to see if the items really were moved to these locations. Suddenly I hear someone walk into the kitchen behind me. I turn around and see it's my mother. She looks a little scared.

"I've been seeing you do this kind of stuff a lot at night lately Nick," she starts crying, "You never remember it. I feel like it's dangerous and I'm afraid of what might be happening to you. What if you have a mental disorder? I think we need to take you to therapy."

She hugs me for a moment. I feel shocked. What if she's right? I don't know what's going on. I am an inch away from completely believing her - because the dream felt so life-like. But I look at her closely. Her hair and makeup are completely unusual compared to how she normally does it. Then I look back at the exercise bike I had placed the towel on. It completely disappeared.

"Ha! This IS a dream!" I say. My mom looks infuriated. I couldn't believe my brain almost succeeded in tricking me.

"Leave me alone," I tell my mom," or I'll..."

"Or you'll what?" She snaps back.

"Or I'll summon a fiery demon to come after you!" I couldn't think of anything better to say. I put my hands out like I am casting a spell, and think about summoning one. Nothing happens. (-.-)'

My mom laughs hysterically. "You want to see a fiery demon?" she says as her eyes begin to glow red.

She starts casting fire all around her. I don't want to feel the pain of being burned in my dream so I leave and try to focus my mind on something else. Somehow that works to get rid of her. I am back in the kitchen. A decorative tree on the counter starts shedding it's leaves. A bright white light - similar to a search light - shines on the house. Then everything turns black and I wake up.

Now I'll try continue write on my dream journal here as I haven't done it much.
Yesterday I came home from my GF after being with her in like 2 weeks straight, so therefor I haven't been on MSN chatting with all my friends as I use to do daily. So yesterday I saw a friend named Nina who lives in Netherlands, she was on MSN and we chatted some as we haven't done it for probly 1 month.

The dream:
I was in a house, it was beautiful house with furnitures and walls made of wood. The kitchen was big and everything looked like new technology. It was around evening time and I was alone with Nina in the house. My GF was gonna come over in a few minutes or hours, I wasn't sure when. However I'd a weird feeling, like me and Nina were very close to eachother.. not like lovers but more like friends or if she would be a sister.
Weird though, we both had to take a shower, so we went together to the shower. (we did not touch eachother or any perv though!).
Later we went out to a small livingroom that was quite dark, we listened to music and waited for my GF to come. After a while of just listening to music and looking on eachother, I heard my GF comming. She came into the room we were in, and she looked abit differently of what my GF irl looks like. But still beauty.

And there the dream must been faded away.


Also I've had some fragment about me being in USA on a beach, with my systemcamera where I took photos of big waves that formed figures.

I woke up around 6:30 A.M. this morning, got up and went to the restroom, then went back to bed. I laid down and closed my eyes. The next thing I know, I felt a presence in the room and I shot up looking around frantically. The room looked kinda similar to this one, however, there were several differences.

The room was illuminated as if it were day time and the room door was wide open, however, I couldn't see anything inside it because it was pitch black. I looked up and saw a large sign that said "Happy Birthday! Ashley Beagan!" I also noticed these rings hanging from wires which were situation around my bed. I felt as though somebody was there and I said "hey!" in a scared female's voice.

I didn't get a response and I screamed because I knew that somebody was there before I woke up and those rings that were suspended from wires were scaring the living crap outta me. When I screamed, it was the scream of a girl, however, it sounded more like what a poltergeist sounded like in the movies. But it was my voice....

I awoke again but this time for real. I drew a sketch of what the room looked like (what I can remember) below:



I've never heard the name "Ashley Beagen" before and I have no idea what those rings were but they scared the crap out of me. If anybody knows anything about them, then please enlighten me.

Attempt 13:

This time I actually managed to stay aware for a little time longer, but I still fell asleep unconsciously, but this time I also regained awareness again. The problem this time was that the guided mp3 meditations I were listening to was on repeat so I had to move to turn it off when it got on repeat. So I will fix that and make a new attempt this night.

I did not remember any vivid dreams this night and I wasn't as aware as in the dreams as I have been the previous nights.
But on the coming attempts I am not going to focus on going into the dream, instead I am just going to aim for conscious sleep and let the dream come to me.

Now some minutes ago I actually had a breakthrough in meditation ;) I managed to stay aware for 50 minutes without falling asleep, which I usually end up doing. What I did was instead of focusing on an anchor like my eyes or my breath I focused on the awareness of my location. Close your eyes now and just think of where you are, you can somehow "sense" it. And everytime it felt like I was concentrating too much on my thoughts I focused on that.
Next time my body fall asleep and my mind is awake, I will try this meditation and maybe I will find myself being aware of a completley location! :)

Just a little motivation for you:

It took Stephen LaBerge, Robert Waggoner and most of the other lucid dreaming authors 25-30 to learn to frequentley lucid dream and to control the environment, so if you are struggling just remember that you are still doing better than what they did. And for me, it took the guy who learns from Don Juan about 2 years to focus his attention to anything he wanted in his dreams.

I am going to shorten this time span!

03.13.2012

Call of Duty: WAW simulation, Meeting Someone (Non-lucid)

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID

Dream 1: Call of Duty: WAW Simulation

Okay, I was playing a match in Call of Duty: World at War, the only thing different, is that I'm actually IN it. I was picking a choice between which attachment I should pick for the MP40, and I believed I decided to go with the Silencer.

I can't determine if I'm lucid or not, but I AM feeling everything, I'm feeling the gun, I'm feeling the tension, I'm feeling the sense of having to kill or be killed mentality rushing inside my mind. So for this one, I guess I'll say I was semi-lucid.

I'm within the Makin map for Multi-player, and I already start having plans of knowing where the other teams are going to be. I stay crouching down, and only dashing when I need to in this dream.

It's really dark, so I had to pay attention most only my vision for any kind of movement, and my hearing as well since the map mostly consisted of sand and concrete, with the mix a little grass as well.

I throw some type of grenade, like a testing grenade to see if the opposing team is over there, and it the test verifies that because like in the game, I heard that sound when your grenade or weapon made an impact to another player.

Then I realized I had to become even more serious since they probably knew which direction the grenade was shooting, and since I know I would have more attention coming towards me, with the high chance of dying and re-spawning again, I threw another grenade for the hell of it.

Then the dream shifts where I'm in this shallow water, and something is covering the area I'm in to where the small fire sources emitted a tan-yellow or an orange type of radiance.

I think I'm moving backwards, since I know no one could be behind me in this path that would lead to a dead-end. I just knew it would lead to a dead-end. I continue moving backwards, and I start to feel more enemies coming in.

I crouch done on my right leg so that my knee makes an L position to the ground while my leg left has its foot, but is making an upside down L position so that I can support the weapon I'm holding.

I already know the direction the enemy is coming, which has to be a left motion from my view, and try to spray and pray me. (Spray and Pray is basically shooting like there's no freaking tomorrow with an automatic weapon, and hoping that it hits and kills your enemy).

Then as I see the enemy, I start shooting immediately, and I back up a little as well while we're both shooting at each other.

I'm wondering which one of us is going to freaking die already, and I'm in the moment of thinking if I'm going to die along with this random enemy.

I think I killed him even with the feelings possibly dying. I know I did more things in this dream, but it was most likely just a shoot-and-run type of thing, which is a bad idea in a dark environment.

That's all I remember for that one.

I know I had more dreams despite how short I slept last night/early morning (which was around 3-4 AM lol).

Dream 2: Meeting Someone (dream frag)

I met someone, I know I did, I would like to believe it was someone familiar.

Maybe it will come in time, or just fade away, but it's better to jot something down than forget.

I don't remember much, but there is one piece..

E., my childhood friend, and his mother came bursting into my house. He had tears in his eyes and his voice threaded with despair. They gave off a panicked energy.
He said I would have to come.
His mother said "E. had a dream, where you died." I understood that they were trying to save me.
Basically, they were messing around in my house, before they dragged me outside.
We were getting away I think, but I don't know to where.

Indigo: Dream Signs and stuff
Red: Petty remarks
Everything started out stupid, i was in a war of 100k people vs 100k people, that was ok, but the fact is that and elephant unleashed all her might in the grond a couple times and the war was over...Just hitting the ground.

Now back to me,

Dungeon Crawling

It wasn't my usual kind of dream, i wasn't lucid and everything i remember is that it was WoWish speaking of grafics, that was before i hit the ground with my fists just to catch some gold(?).

I end up in a hole in the ground, i whine a bit for my friends to help but they ignore my plea.
When i look back, there is a ghost behind me, a silly one, it was like a old stained sheet floating in the middle of the darkness.
No joke, it was really scary, so i keep on diging. Now i'm lost for sure, i can't see the outside anymore and there are these...Signs on the walls...They are EVERYWHERE, look a bit aboriginal and have the following colors: Lime Green,Magenta, Indigo andYellow.
I keep running inside the dungeon, almost pissing in my pants, running away from the unknow.
A party of 4 people just pop in the dungeon with me, i'm not sure if they are friendly, i'm not sure they can see me, but they are 2 boys and 2 girls, all using white tunics, they walk fearlessly inside the dungeon and i realize:
"I'M DREAMING"

i don't know why but i made a poem in that moment, i think it will be useful sometime

"I'm the fear
Made of death and tear
Beware thy living
I'm GOD fearing"


Woke up.

I walked up to my mother, or who I thought was my mother. She didn't look like her, but she acted like her. It might have been my friend's mother. Anyways, I walked up to my mother, and asked her if she could see something for a minute. She replied sure, and I lifted my shirt up to reveal part of my stomach. She gasped.

Across my stomach were scratch marks that just appeared there. I looked to Sam and my friend who were with me, and they had them on their stomachs too. We thought it was just dry skin, or something normal. Apparently not. Suddenly, a doctor came in along with someone else I knew. She (the doctor) looked at the scratches and said, "I'm sorry, but this right here is a disease that defects the legs and arms once you get older. It will cause them to either shrink, grow bigger, or in different ways I can't explain."
"Is there any way we can treat this?" My mother asked.
"Yes, if you have the right things. Basically just feed them a healthy diet of pure vegetables and some other things picked out."

I sighed. Great.

"My mother right away started arranging the food. I walked over to the big window on the right of me and saw that there was a large ladder outside that window, and my cat was perched on it. All of a sudden, he fell off, but he was okay. I laughed, then sighed again. What will happen to me when I get older?

"Okay girls. It's ready." My mom called.
She pushed me my plate of what looked like corn, some weird roll, and broccoli.
After eating it all, it soon dawned on me that I would be eating this every day for a couple more years.

Then I woke up.

I was in a store like a JC Penny or Macy's. There were a few arcade games set up including Pop'n Music. I started to play for a bit, then I realized I had to be dreaming, since these arcade machines were only in Japan. I played with the machine for a bit, then set off to find an open area for my task, but by then I woke up.
--------
I was in the cafeteria with my friends. I did a RC and someone asked what I was doing. I told him I was checking reality (though I didn't get lucid from this.

I'm teaching programming to someone. I only remember the computer screen, nothing else was visible in the dream. First I go trough a part of code and then he starts writing something. When I see what he's writing I tell him that there is a function that already does that, so he could just use it.

I woke up after this and had to go to the bathroom. I'm not really even trying WILDs but since I had woken up, I didn't wan't to waste the change. It didn't work, any better that in the evening, though. It was probably too late in the morning, I was almost completely awake.

I'm playing kongregate. The have updated a LOT of their old games. I was casually playing them, when I found one called "Duck Life 4 Classic" I played it. It had nothing to do with ducks. It was a very weird game where as you were walking in real life, you press the space bar. Everytime you press the space bar, the girl is dumped by her husband once. Everytime you walk infront of a doorway, it resets. I managed to get like 14,999 (I didn't really press it that many times though)

(I had this dream a few nights ago, but I never put it in. I did right it down that day though)

Had this dream a good while back.

I was some kind of bird creature and I was running from insanely huge dinosaurs and predators. The setting was that of a destroyed city. I recall taking refuse inside one of the destroyed buildings and let me tell ya.... The feeling of being prey is terrifying....

Friday, March 9, 2012
WBTB 5:54 - 6:27 GM4mg+300Choline
WILD
I'm looking at the inside of the bus. Lots of passengers, some are standing. One of them is Sean Connery. I say, OK, I could have this LD. I am there - and I'm standing on a busy street. Then my cat shifts position and wakes me up.

Sunday, March 12,2012

It's at night. I'm accross the street from my house in NZ. There is 2 more people with me. I look up at the sky and there is 4-5 small suns and also moons. The landscape of the Moon has shifted.

We decide to better go home, when we hear some heavy trucks turning corner at H. street. So we can't run accross the street. We hide, untill they pass. But the last 2 wehicles stop right by us. There are some tanks and troop transport trucks. We run by them and hope we make it before they disembark. Our heavy backpack are slowing us down. But the military are getting out of their trucks as we run by.

We still make it to my house. Close the entry door to the hallway and I'm locking it. But I already see one female alien in pink sweater approaching the door. I prop it with my foot. Someone else is running towards the house. We open the door to let him in. He trips and drops some groceries and jug of milk. No time to pick it up, because the alien is just rounding the corner. I feel like we should get the groceries, because we could be under siege for a while.

Then I'm in a gov. research facility. I have a feeling, our gov. is cooperating with aliens. I'm part of some underground movement. I see a full color flier with info, how something is making people sick on purpose. It's very detailed with pictures. Then an alien female researcher stands behind me and I have an uneasy feeling about it. I wake up.