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Sorry i havn't posted in a while, my weeks are very hectic and it's difficult to find any spare time, especially to write dreams down. I was dreaming throughout the week though.

I had like 15 false awakenings last night. Because all those false awakening really threw me off, I will only be writing down the one solid dream i remember. I am appalled at my behaviour during this dream. This is not something i would ever, EVER consider doing in real life. There is a part where i kill another person, and i think it might even have been another dreamer, but i sincerely hope it wasn't...i don't want to hurt anyone. If it was, i'm sorry.

To explain my color coding:
Red is for Non Lucid.
Green is for lucid.
Purple is for my speech.
Blue is for male speech.
Pink is for female speech.
Black is for side notes, that are not a part of the dream.

I'm with a group of men, traveling along a highway in a car. to the left of the highway is a hill, or a slope. It goes down far enough that i cannot see the bottom. To the right, the slope goes uphill, yet i cannot see the top. Anyways, we are driving and discussing a plan. A plan we have, to break itno this place, and place an object i nthere, to destroy something, and also steal all the money from the place while i nthe process. I don't remember the exact plan, but it's solid, we cannot fail. Eventually we arrive at this lace, it's like a mixture of a school and a hospital. The students are adults though. So we come in through the main entrance, and lock it up. No one gets in and no one gets out. We head down a hall to left and enter the only door on the left. It's some kind of classroom. We come in and tell the teacher to shut the hell up, and give us the acess code for the electrical room, and the vault. She beings arguing with us, and givings us a hard time. None of my associates knwo what to do. I tell them i'll handle this. (this part is kind of confusing because i act like i'm lucid, and that i know it's a dream, but i am not actually lucid and don't realize i'm dreaming.)

"listen, lady, your life is in your hands here. All you have to do is give us what we need and we won't kill you."

"Well what about the class? we could easily just all over power you. And they are all witnesses, none of you are wearing mask. What are you going to do kill us all?"

"These people don't matter, they are just dream characters. They aren't real, i can do whatever i want with them. Watch."

I snap my fingers, and make one of the students stand up and casually wlak to the doro behind us, and lock it. She then comes and stands behind me, leaning on my shoulder and looking at the Teacher with a sly grin.

"you see, complete control."

I wave my hand and all of the Dream character's dissapear. The teacher looks upset, she knew she has lost.

"Fine, i'll give you the acess codes. And then go away and leave me alone. The acess codes is 219."
(219 is a number that follows me everywhere in waking life. this is kind of creepy.)

I tell one of my associates to go check it out. he comes back in a minute or two and says it was correct. I look at the teach and say, "thanks." The shoot her several times.

...

My associates and I are in a sort of in a cafeteria / lounge room, which is next to the acess room. There are more of us now. We completed our mission and are jsut kind of hanging out and relaxing before we leave. Suddenly someone comes up to me, i and i shocked. It is someone who i was friends with when i was younger, in waking life. He is older now, and still a skinny little s**t, but he looks a little 'meaner'.

He looks at me and says, "I finally found you. If you want to live, come with me. I'm taking you to Andrew."
(Andrew was another friend my waking life childhood. He was the sort of leader of their little 'crew'.)

"You STILL don't scare me kid. Neither does andrew for that matter. It would be nie see them again thoguh, perhaps i can...'clear up'...some of that bad blood." I say with a smile on my face.

"whatever lets go."

He handcuffs me and we get in his truck. We are driving along the same highway we where using to get to the building i had just commited crimes in. We are nearing the exit, and i realize Andrew would probably kill me on sight, and i am handcuffed so there is nothing i can do.

"Hey little bitch. I know you have hated me our entire lives, what do you say before we go to andrew we fight. Or are you a still a coward?"

He looks at me and slams on the brakes. We pull over to the side of the road. He opens my door and kicks me out of the truck. I fall to the ground, but it doesn't matter, i needed to be hear anyways. I slide my arms aroudn my lower body, moving handcuffed hands from behind me to in front of me. I hear the truck door slam on his side and he is starting to walk around the back to get to me. I open the doro to his truck, get in, and lock the door. Whe he realizes this he comes running up to the side of the winder and begins smashing on it. "You F**king coward!!"

"you're the one who wants to fight someone with handcuffs, not me."

I reach around in his glove compartment and find the keys, I remove the handcuffs. It's go time. I unlock the door and kick it open, which knocks him back. I jump down out of the truck and land. I ready myself. "now it's a little more even. Although, probably not, because you never could beat me." He gets angry, and pulls out a knife. "that's going to kill you, i suggest you put that away."

He ignores me and charges me. He goes for a stab in my stomach. I gracefully side step him, grabbing his arm in the process, and redirected the momentum to make his arm stab himself, in stead. He just looks at me with malice in his eyes, blood coming out of his mouth. He tries to say something, but more blood just comes out of his mouth. I look at his casually and say "Yeah, whatever kid." and gently kick him so he falls over, lying on the ground.

"well, that takes care of that, and now...."

Now, i realize i just killed someone on the side of the dang highway. This is not good. I can see all the people looking at me as they go by in their cars, some of them on phones, obviously calling 911. My only option is to cross the highway and retread upwards into the hill, as the hill was covered in forest. I cross and begin going around the woods, try to find a path. (The woods where beautiful by the way, all of the leaves where orange and yellow, and there was a heavy scent of 'fall' in the air. This is strange, as outside the woods everything was green.) I eventually find an opening, and...it's the boss. The one who organize the entire operation. He's stand by a tree, talking with some huge guy, must be his number one goon or something. The boss is short and fat. He is literally a spitting image of Ernie Potts from Hey Arnold!.


I come running up them.

"Boss, i ran into some trouble, I had to kill a kid on the highway and everyone has seen my face. I need to law low for a bit. Allow me to return to base."

He looks at me for a bit, then lets out a very subtle grin.

"Ah yes..i had....heard...about that. You can go to base as soon as you dig up the treasure. After yoru collegues retrieved the money from the school, they buried it here. I need you dig it up and take it to a location for me."

"What...i can't do that. There are going to be cops everywhere, looking for me."

"No no, it's fine. You'll be okay, i promise."

"No, i'm not doing it."

He chuckels a bit and looks at the big goon.

"i understand your concern. But i am the boss, and you really don't have a choice in the matter."

I get an idea. If i am forced to do this, i will just take the money and run. If i have to risk my life and freedom, then it will be for me and me only.

"fine."

"Ah, good, i'm glad you came to your senses."

He turns around, and begins talking and joking with the Tall goon.

Suddenly, it hits me.

"Wait...you...you planned this whole thing."

He turns around and looks at me, with a fake quizical look.

"You are the one who told Andrew my location, and you told him the Operation we where on. You told him you would give him a cut if he helped take care of me. So he sent someone after me. But you knew i woudl easily outmatch him. You knew i would kill him in a public place, and become a suspect. And then your plan was to have me move the money to a location, so it would appear i was the only who robbed the school as well, making you and all your men completly in the clear."

"...Rather impressive, you are not as dumb as you look."

"you won't get away with this."

"Oh? but i will....."


He and his good pull out a large knife. They begin closing in on me. Alright, stay calm we got this. The goon comes at me, and i do the same thing i did to him as i did to the person who tried to stab me in the stomach earlier.

The boos looks at me and snivels,"Impressive. But you will not kill me."

he comes at me and swings his knife, i am forced to roll backwards to avoid it, i wasn't able to pull the knife out of the goons gut. He walks over to the goon and picks it up, switching his grips on the knife so he holds them backwards. He comes at me, and goes for about 7 or 8 swipes/stabs, and i dodge them all. However, he is not leaving any opening, and without a weapon to parry his attacks, it's difficult to create one. He manages to get a stab on my upper breast, under my left collar bone. I ignore the pain. He keeps attacking and i keep dodging. He starts breathing heavily....this is my chance...
I take a side step forward, preparing the all powerful side step kick. Before i even bring my leg up all the way though, he jumps forward, and re-stabs my my breast, and the other knife goes into my lower abdomen.

"You where fainting....you f**k...."

i fall to the ground. He begins laughing obnoxiously.

And then i wake up, with my breast and lower abdomen hurting me. I was wicked mad he had done that, and i remember not even opening my eyes when waking up. All i could think was, "that bastard! i have to get back in that dream and kick his ass!" But....i was not able to get back into that dream. If that was a real dreamier i killed in the school i am terribly sorry if i disrupted your dream. I mean no harm!

There was another dream i had, but i can only remember bits and pieces of it, because as i said i had about 15 false awakenings last night so it was very confusing. The parts of that dream, there was like an all powerful vampire, and he was hunting my friend, who was a young weak vampire for some reason. I wasn't a vampire, but a vampire hunter. The dream basically consisted of me protecting my friend, fighting off the powerful vampire, and retreating and resting until he found us again. There was one part in the dream though, where we where at some college for some reason, and it suddenly got attacked by zombies. I rallied the students and got them all to start killing the zombies with me. Fun stuff.

Started out on a morning facing north, on country roads. Seemed as if it was going to be a bright clear day as the sun was coming to the eastern horizon. Roads and area was where I grew up and lived in my youth. Was going east and ended up visiting my maternal grandparents , long deceased. Was there a while and then moved along west picking up my paternal grandmother and taking here to eat somewhere, red lobster I think.
Moved along west some more down a hill and to the north. seemed as if I just dropped my grandmother off somewhere. Came to a fence along a road that was running east and west. Parked in front of the fence in a grassy field. To the west and north across the road were three girls laying out in their bikini's sunning themselves and talking. I thought they were pretty good looking, but seemed distracted from that with other matters on my mind.
I looked to the east and up a short hill next to my truck was a trailer house. On the north end of the trailer house was a older black woman standing their smiling at me. She said(with sound and words, which is not normal for my dreams) something like " wouldn't be a man if' n ya didn't take notice of that and give it some thought" as she gazed over at the 3 woman. I replied something like " true, but I'm almost 25 years married". She responded with something I either didn't hear or don't remember, to which I said something like " probably going to be divorce soon anyhow" . She said something and I said I'd like to come over and talk a bit and spend some time with her. She smiled as if eager to have me for company. As we walked towards the back of her yard the dream ended . I woke up a bit disappointed I didn't get to talk..


She was another woman who in my dream had distinct presence that I was aware of and a certain rich warmth and love. The 3 women across the road, while looking great and sexy, were empty of such feeling...illusions in a way

I remember nothing.

I was having some non lucid dream that I can no longer recall all that well that involved me walking home from school. The dream may have been along the lines of an anxiety dream because I was counting on a friend to get my backpack for me; I had left my back pack at the tech school.
So I was walking home and taking a rather strange route, past the large blue factory near the edge of my town. There is a path that runs by it in RL, but in the dream, the path was broken, there were pits and valleys. It looked as though some construction work was being done on the factory.
I also took note that there were a large amount of gardening supplies, there were some plants in trays and saplings that looked as though they were ready to be planted. Perhaps the factory was looking to be environmentally friendly. I try to get through this part with out stepping on any flowers.
I get back on the path and it normals out a bit. I get to the end, where my subdivision would start, but this does not look like my subdivision at all. I may also note the seasonal difference. In my home state it is winter, but in this dream it was summer. The subdivision I was in looked something like mine, but the layout appeared different.
I get lucid here, for no reason at all!. For a moment I was excited. In getting lucid I had just completed my goal of 8 lucid dreams this month. (And in the 11th hour too.) But here we are.
I took a right off the path and began walking down the street. I rubbed my hands together and said to myself "stabilize dream."
I tried to execute some voice commands, but they didn't work. My voice sounded rather strange too, like that clip of the "only thing we have to fear is fear itself speech." I didn't care. Also, I felt like I was wearing a cloak. I caught glimpses of a hood in my peripheral vision and had long black sleeves on.
I also took note of one thing that I have never heard before in a dream; birdsong. And it was beautiful.
I got to the end of the street and arrived into some kind of cul-de-sac. I felt a strong wind blow in out of the forest in front of me. And an even stronger gale blow from behind. After a moment, I realized that what I was experiencing was not wind, but rather gravitational shifts.
I then had a gravitational shift that pushed me downwards. I was pinned to the ground and unable to move. And I came up with a rather... Interesting means of trying to get the gravity back to normal. I held my hands behind my back and manifested a headset microphone. I put it onto my head and asked whoever was on the other end to please lower the gravity to 10% of what it was.
For a moment, I was able to stagger to my feet. But another wave of gravity slammed me back into the pavement. This actually felt somewhat painful. I felt as though I was being dragged backwards along the pavement. Also, with all this going on, it was difficult to hang on to the idea of lucidity.
I went on the headset again, and asked whoever was there to please make the gravity 1% of what it was. One more, I was able to get to my feet for a second. Then a gravity wave flew past me and tore the headset off of my head. It flew in front of me then looped around behind my head and flew off into the sky.
The gravity slammed me back into the ground. I was laying on my back now, looking up. I saw there was a dark patch in the sky where the moon was supposed to be, but it (now this is the strange part.)
The moon looked as though it had been carved into shapes. I can recall the shape very clearly, there were three feline forms, though they looked to be standing on their back legs. They all had long hair as if they were human girls and had taken fighting poses. I could tell it had a sort of anime styling to the outline.
"Okay, the moon has three cats."
Gravity returned to normal and the design in the sky faded. I got the feeling that whatever had shifted gravity like that was trying to get that message across. Now they are done, and I am free to experience my dream as I wish.
I walk back up the street I came about two houses, then make a right down another street. I am stabilizing as I go, paying attention to how my feet feel as they hit the sidewalk. Am I wearing shoes? socks? I can't recall now.
I can't help but feel that I am alone, there are no other dream characters. Just as I do, I hear a man's voice.
"Hey! Hey you!"
About two houses away, a man is stepping outside. Then, across the street, another two houses away a group of three kids come outside, along with what looks like their nanny.
I continue walking and go past the man. I look at him and think "he's a dream character, just a fragment of my own subconscious, not a real person." And after I thought that to myself, I got really really lucid. I thought about the "5 layers of a lucid dream and thought about going to layer 4. Maybe I'm already at layer 4, I just haven't made any changes yet.
"You guys are dream characters and I am your dreamer!"
The man and the nanny gave me these really kind looks and they nodded. The kids jumped up and down with excitement. They ran over to me and asked me if I wanted to play [some game].
"No, you know what, I have a better idea!"
The kids look a little confused.
"I am going to teach you guys how to fly."
The kids look very confused.
I kneel down on their level.
"You need to focus the energy in your own body, your chi."
I demonstrate by doing my old flying method (I guess that's not fire, but chi.) and lift off, thrusting up with these cyan-ish flames. I start to slowly rise up above them, and the kids follow. The three kids instantly seem to get it, one kid had green flames, another orange, and another, purple. I note that the sun has set and it is now nighttime. A fourth kid comes outside and asks if he can fly with us.
"Sure, just focus your chi!"
He rockets up on red flames and joins us. We are not flying very high or very fast, but that matters not. This is still the most fun I've had in a lucid dream, ever! The colors of everyone's different chi against the night were just beautiful.
I sense that I am losing the dream. I look to the cluster of first-time fliers. For a moment, I thought that they were other dreamers and not dream characters.
"Now, look, I'll be back."
I lose the dream. I am in a black void for a second and see myself. I then wake up.

Well that's it, no TOTM this month. God dang it. Who cares, teaching dream characters to fly is much more fun than asking them what they are doing different this year anyway.

So that's it, got in my 8 LDs. Can't wait for February's TOTMs. I also thought of a good one on my own. I want to try and listen to music in a dream and see what it sounds like.

I woke up lying in a room that I'd never been in before but I knew it was mine. I stay lying down as my eyes wander around the room. Someone shifts next to me so I turn my head to look at them. Stiles looks back at me and smiles. He grabs my hand and squeezes it tightly. "Are we awake", he asks. I cannot answer him.

My reality checking lately has had me considering 'if this were a dream what would I do next?'...

Last night I had EPIC dreams...

One dream was lucid... but not. I was not aware I was dreaming, but I was also on huge trip the entire dream thinking to myself if this were a dream I would do this and proceeded to do exactly that each time, without realising that, hey I am dreaming!

Another dream I was in a telephone booth and each of its walls were distorted panels that were each member in my family. As I looked at each they stopped moving and clarified into perfect pictures. That's pretty deep because I recently have accepted the difficult fact of who they are.

Another dream I was comforting a long line of terminally ill patients.

The next I had gone ahead and studied nursing like I once wanted to and it was my first day on the job, but I was also a patient in the same ward.

The rest of the night was massive and I cant put things into words!!!
The theme seemed to be resolution. Very deep and meaningful. The night before last was strange too, I usually remember my dreams, but that night I was blank, very rare.

Calea Z usually has zero effect on me. Mugwort now and again produces epic dreams that go on and on. I had both last nite.

Dream Fragment: I'm standing in a lit up room, it's bright white. There's this blonde girl in my personal space urging me to tell her about my secret. She tells me that she knows I have a twin sister. I just stare at her confused and she gets more and more aggravated with me and grabs my arms and pushes me out of her way into a wall, and she walks out a door and slams it shut.

Morning of January 31, 2014. Friday.

Dream #: 17,210-01. Reading time: 1 min 20 sec.



I am in the “last cave,” the last form of existence bordering the world. I approach the wall to perhaps move on to “higher” awareness. There is a purple glow from the cave wall, a circle around the letter “M,” and two back to back instances of the letter “L” (representing our last names), which is also an upside-down “T.” It burns for a time, a “cool” fire. It also seems like an elevator button at the same time it is a lock (that I have a key for). (“M” can also represent an upside-down “W,” depending on the font or style.)

“M” is Virgo, the 6th (Yin) sign and 13th letter, Zsuzsanna born on the 13th and a Virgo. The upside-down “T” is Sagittarius (me), the 9th (Yang) sign and my birth on the 20th (T being the 20th letter). It is within the circle often reserved for the S and C (our first names when anglicized) or 6 and 9 of Yin Yang. No faux system (such as astrology) means anything, yet can form patterns to discern personal recognition.

“M” also came from the symbol for “water.”

“T” is the second (2 again) most common letter in English (after “E”). It is also the last letter of the Western Semitic and Hebrew alphabets..

T over M - “cross over the water,” a play on going to Australia to marry my twin flame Zsuzsanna

It represents TWO, approaching entropy of the English language (a coincidental letter pattern that spells “two”). The “W” (or “M”) splits into two instances of the letter “V,” the Gate itself, the Master number 22, and the bottom half of the Heart (in continuous cycles, also face to face twos). Even my last name means “the two.”

It is layer upon layer, and all the strength of every member of the human race cannot move or change it.

I am unsure where I will go. It is a phasing point that allows access to higher dimensions of any range.

---

Dream Fragment: I'm in a bathroom that looks super close to my moms. Madison from american horror story is in here with me leaning against the counter and she shoves a wooden brush into my hands and tells me to brush her hair, so I do. Then she pushes me into the bath tub and opens the door and leaves, and leaves the door open and I have a hard time getting back up.

I'm in this huge one story house, theirs a countless numbers of other house guests here with me. All of them are rude snotty bitches, but this one girl with dark brown hair is cool. We both go out to the backyard under this wooden gazebo thing. There's this other little building on the other side of the back yard with a sliding glass door. She goes into it, and talks to me through the glass. She puts her hair in weird rubber bands, and says she gonna cut it because the bitches will steal it in her sleep so she wants to burn it. She goes out of view from me, then comes out with tall broom hair and the side shaved and now all of a sudden she looks Samoan or Hawaiian or something. I ask her why she didn't cut it shorter and she says that that doesn't apply anymore to her. So we both walk back into the house and everyone questions who she is like they don't recognize her, and she loves it and refuses to tell them.

Me and mccrae from BB15 are out on this patio, there's this huge bean bag chair that can fit like 15 people, he sits on it and wants me to play this battle ship looking game, but I don't really want to, he begs me and follows me, then some of the room mates in the house looking out the glass door give me angry looks, so I go sit on the bean bag chair and he does to and I agree to play a game with him. I wanna play the blue pieces but her puts it so I have to play the yellow pieces so I get all butt hurt and lay on my side.

My dad is waiting outside to get revenge over something. Me my sister, my half sister, and my niece are all sitting around the kitchen table figuring out what to do, but I'm the only one worried. They're just worried about the chocolate milk bag I'm drinking from like those ones from school. I tell them I don't know where I got it, but it was warm and tasted off but I kept drinking it fro some reason. It will give me HP, so they get pissed that they don't have one in case they lose HP. I tell them I can just steal them some and that I stole them all the time.

I'm in this underground wet place, there's a latter on the wall that leads up. I'm this bald man, I'm wearing a clown mask that is covered in blood, and these three guys are holding guns but don't even need to shoot, me because I'm moving wrong and slamming my head on the floor and against the wall and the men laugh at me. It amuses them, and I'm making grunting noises and am drooling and foaming at the mouth. I try to use the wall to get up, but then they all step down on me with their boots on me to hold me down, so I scream and they laugh more, and then we hear load foot steps coming from down this hallway, his boots are stomping in metal floor. The three men who were fucking with me, ran silently in fear up the latter and leave me twitching and stuck on the floor. I don't know if the man is coming to help me or hurt me.

I'm in the front yard, it's sunny as fuck. There's these cracked brick walls everywhere that usually aren't. My dad is in the yard with me, and I'm trying to hide from him. I ducking with my back against a brick wall. I have aerial view and I see him sneaking over. I run from my hiding spot and he runs after me, I hop the front gate, and steal his gmc jimmy (an suv). I get into it an hope that he left his keys in the car. I find them still in the ignition. I start the car at the car doesn't go fast at first, I try to hurry away before he catches up and gets in the car, I drive and see him running behind me after the car, and I see him stop because the car finally accelerated at a decent speed. Then the jimmy turns into a shitty dirt bike,and it's going so fucking slow. I'm driving through cobble stone streets between houses, and through alleys, I go through a short cut trying to make difficult directions so he can't find while the whole time worried at how slow the bike is going. Then I go through this alley that leads to a driveway with this girl washing her car, I frighten her, but i tell her I'm just trying to get away from someone. Then she points me through some trees to a dirt path, I tell her my bike is slow, she put gas in my bike, and then my bike goes faster, and then I realized it also goes faster when I turn the throttle, I think how dumb that I was just rolling and using the throttle or putting gas. Nor the dirt bike is fast as fuck, and I go down that path the girl pointed me to and it lead straight to my house and my dad is still in the street, so I make a u-turn and he begins chasing me, he's faster now, but I'm faster to, he chases me longer this time, but I still get away.

I decided to take a brief nap and this is what i recalled. I had just recently gotten into a super car, this thing was beautiful i couldnt tell you what model it was but it was sexy af. anyway i decided to take it for a spin down the highway. I drove fast and with precision.. hence "drove it like you stole it" i got down the highway quite a ways and decided to veer off into a different road. i took mental note where i was turning so that i didnt get lost and i could find my way home. this entire time i was in a third person view driving the car which i dont like but its just how it was. i then turned around after travelling that way quite a bit with intentions to get back home before i wreck the vehicle. i started grinding the gears bad, i turned in front of a car and tried taking off briskly, which i did, but didnt shift corrrectly. either way i made it out with out a scratch on the beauty. out of nowhere i started hearing some bikers pulling up next to me and weaving in and out of traffic with me it was pretty awesome. then next thing i know im driving a crotch rocket. and the thing is im not even on it my hand is pushing it kinda like im 4 years old playing with toy cars. the guys pulled up next to me and tried to say something but i couldnt hear them over the roar of the motors. i then noticed my backl tire was completely gone and just the rim was on the pavement. they laughed and said something which i dont remember, then i spoke and they said they couldnt here me over the wierd noise the bike was now making. my brother then wakes me up telling me dinner is ready