false awakening

Introduction

I got up far too early this morning and decided to go back to sleep and lucid dream. It took me a while to fall asleep again after waking up. I used the usual MILD strategies - keep my body perfectly still until I experience sleep paralysis; focus on sleep; and maintain my lucid dreaming intentions. After an hour I so, I found myself in my first dream of several.

The Dreams
I was able to repeatedly induce a series of semi-lucid dreams, most of which I have already forgotten. I still remember a few of the dreams though. The first was a false awakening where I checked my hands. It was then that I realized that it was a false awakening - I had six fingers on each hand! Next, I squeezed my nose and realize that I could still breathe through it. That confirmed it - I was in a lucid dream! At this point, I was so excited that I was starting to wake up as I felt my hands on my bed (despite standing up in the dream). I tried to go back to sleep and lost consciousness. And so, I decided to "reboot" the dream.

Take two. I held on to the previous dream in order to re-enter it. This time I found myself in the same dream bedroom I woke up in but instead of a false awakening, I was standing in the room. Just for fun, I did some experiments: I jumped and floated around. Then I waved my arms. Uh-oh...I was getting to excited again and my physical body was starting to wake again! I let go of lucidity and tried to "reboot" the dream again.

Take three. Once again, I found myself in the same bedroom. I found my dad who was a dream character who behaved almost nothing like him in real life! I approached him with the intention of conversing with my subconscious. He seemed quite ... untalkative, providing with one word answers on everything I ask him. Nevertheless, the answers provided what I needed to move on. I was starting to wake up again from trying to be too lucid so I gave up lucidity again and rebooted into another dream.

Final dream. I found myself at a lottery booth with lottery tickets scattered across a table. I tried to read the tickets for numbers and dates, hoping to see today's date and tonight's predicted winning numbers. But the numbers keep changing each time I glanced away. Instead of numbers, some of the tickets had words on them. For instance, one of them had "poop blossom" instead of lottery numbers. Hahaha...very funny, subconscious mind.

Observations
- Time/Duration: 7 AM - 9 AM / 2 hrs.
- Dream control was poor in all of these dreams.
- Dream vividness was also very poor - these felt more like daydreams than lucid dreams.
- I was more "awake" in these lucid dreams than any I have had before (which were all DILD).
- I was partly awake during the transitions between dreams.
- Lucidity disappears if I become too "awake" in my dreams because then I can feel my physical body.
- I was very "analytical" in these dreams, much like in waking life. I constantly tried to figure out what's "rational" and what's not in order to stay lucid. Maybe that's why I couldn't do many physics-defying tasks such as flying.
- I was tired after waking up.

Speculations
- Having a series of lucid dreams reduces dream recall, analogous to having a series of regular dreams.
- Vivid lucid dreams require me to be "less awake." DILD earlier in the morning may be best for that, based on prior experience.
- Dream control requires less analytical thinking and more spontaneity. Stop thinking about physics!

Planned Experiments
- Try another MILD early in the morning but wake up after the first dream instead of "chaining" more dreams to it. Is dream recall improved? Am I less tired? How is dream vividness?
- Dream control: Be more spontaneous in dreams. Stop being so analytical. (This is hard...)

I was thinking about/visualizing a story that I have been working on lately and running through some plot elements. I was thinking about a part where the characters fly to space on a special spaceplane. I then decided that had best wake up, since I have to teach Taekwondo on Wednesdays. I brought myself out of the visualization but felt odd accelerations.

I opened my eyes and saw that I was on the special spaceplane, and we were landing. I did a nose pinch and sure enough I was still dreaming. I sat up in my chair and looked around. I told myself I would regret this at some point, but that It was important that I wake up. All that managed to do at first was make the plane phase away and drop me on the runway.

The runway morphed into a road and became narrower. I was now standing to one side of it, in a wheat feild. Across the road were several large industrial buildings. There was a stand selling bananas on my side of the road. I noted that what few cars there were were driving on the opposite sides of the road that I am used to.

I went over to the guy at the banana stand because he was kind of blurry and I wanted to get a closer look. He turned out to be this huge hulk of a man with a balding head. He smiled and said:

"Im the Supervisor, Can I get a taxi number?"

(A cookie to anyone who can tell me what that DC referencing without having to look it up.)

I saw the word 'Taxi' was printed on the side of one of his bananas.

Second false awakening. This time I was in my backyard. I thought it was waking life for awhile. I looked around and all around me were digital clocks. But of course they all read weird times like 12:338 was one that I remember. This caused me to reality check. I became lucid and realized that this had happened twice now, clearly I wasn't getting out of this dream.

I remember at this point in the dream I looked at my hands. People always talk about how your hands look so weird in dreams. Mine seem to look completely normal most of the time. I look at them. The skin tone is darker than I am used to but they look completely normal. I'm not wearing my bracelets, but I didn't make a note of that. I try to poke my finger through my hand. I'm simply met with the usual resistance and I can't do it. Just like a waking life hand.

I guess I figured there was no point to continue to try to wake up, so I figured I would just see what the dream had to offer. I looked around the backyard. All of the plants/trees were gone. Not just the ones in my yard, but everywhere. Just the grass was left. I looked inside my house through a window and saw that all the furniture was gone.

I tried to fly by jumping off the table on my back patio but I just floated back down to the ground. I also noticed that I could see my reflection in the window of my house. For some reason I had really long hair, like down to my knees long hair.

"Hello?" I yelled and my voice echoed though the neighborhood. I became worried that this would be like one of my early lucid dreams where I was alone somewhere and no dream characters would show up. I was relieved to see. A group of identical people in the distance talking to one another.

Out of the group came Marcus. Except he had a huge distracting beer belly. He walked over and I asked him something. I remember his voice very clearly when he replied but I can't remember anything having to do with what he said. Then Manei appeared as well. She was pulling a wagon and she looked to be about 10. Except she also had a mustache. (Okay, so not her funniest appearance mess-up to date.)

She said she was excited because she was taking to see me a music show. She said something about it being a group from her tribe and their traditional performance. I didn't see any show, but I saw some people putting towels over a fence. I thought this was kind of weird until I figured out that it was a puppet music show. So the people were putting towels over the fence so you wouldn't pay attention to them, only the puppets then they had large puppets, too big for even a hand. They actually turned out to be costumes.

Okay. So what are the towels for? So that the actors have privacy while they change. Pointless since we can see them from where we are sitting; and they're just putting the costumes on over their clothes.

It was at this point that I took into question the reason my usual DCs looked different. In particular, I wanted to know why Manei was so small all of the sudden. I asked her and she replied, but I don't recall what she said.

I then notice that once they put on the costume, their appearance seems to morph some. One of the actors changes into Manei, and the one sitting next to me goes away. Only this version of her is super vivid, and the correct age, except she was wearing beige/brown instead of the usual red, and had two braids. I remember the same kind of thing happened to Marcus only he didn't have a beer gut and he was wearing gray instead of blue. I remember both of these DCs really seemed to 'pop' from the dreamworld.

Then, I felt myself getting pulled twoard the third actor. My 'soul' was forcibly pulled from my body, but I just let it happen, curious as to what would happen when I was absorbed by the costumed actor. I was then distracted when I noticed there was a fourth actor. But he/she wasn't turning into anybody.

A computer error appeared.

"Compatibility Error.
Dream [1] character has incompatible drivers.
Dream [4] character not found.

Would you like to exit the dream or check online for a solution?"

I lost the dream and woke up laughing.

First dream

I went out of my home, and entered a car with rest of family. Somehow, it contained ten persons, with everyone having comfortable space. We drove to my school. With my younger sister we entered the toilet. Just as we entered the room, a powerful force closed the doors and attacked us. It tried to push us into a portal of some kind, also scratching and trying to break limbs.

Someone opened the doors to the toilet, and I managed to escape from the ghost. However, my sister was still there. I quickly grabbed the doors, preventing them to close. The ghost was strong, and I almost lost with it, but then two other girls entered the toilet, and told us about the way to banish the ghost.

There were three sinks and two liquid soap dispensers in the toilet. Used in correct order they would weaken the ghost, and then washing your hands in each of sinks would banish the ghost for good. They did that while I was holding the door, and then we went away.

We headed to stairs, and went to lower floor. As we were going to entrance, my older brother appeared in front of us, shouted "Wakka-Takka-Tobbaco!" in high and annoying voice, and with light speed he ran upstairs.

False awakening

I was on a ten day course, far away from my house. I entered the toilet, and turned the lights on. I went closer to toilet seat, and looked to a bathtub. There was a dude taking a bath in there. I said "You really should close the doors. And turn the lights on too." while peeing.

So first, I dreamed my cousin, her friends and I were at a toy store when we were younger. Apparently, in the dream, my aunt (who lives in Hawaii) was living in our neighborhood. I asked her if she wanted to come along to the store. She says "Sorry, I can't be in this dream, I'm busy." For some reason, I didn't realize I was in a dream, even after she said that! So we went to the toy store. Stuff happened, Blah blah, and I woke up to sleep paralysis. I think. Or a false awakening, in a drem... But everything was so in detail, but blurry. I saw one of those things that hangs up pictures. I thought it was a little hole. Anyway, I couldn't see my hands, because I couldn't move. But I felt like I could move my hands. So I did a couple of reality checks. I tried to push my finger through my other palm, and it felt like it worked, But I wasn't sure. So I closed my eyes, plugged my nose (or felt like my hands were plugging my nose) And closed my mouth. Apparently I could breathe, and I tried to move my head. I sorta figured out how, for some reason a voice in my head said to "Imagine my head is a disc, and a DJ is moving it". I tried it, and I guess it worked! I turned into a dog, and my sister into a cat, and I don't remember what happened. Then, I turned into a Zayn Malik- looking guy, and after that, I lost lucidity.-

Did WILD, arrived outside my Nan's house. It was a bright, sunny day. I looked at the other houses lining the street and I saw that their design was vastly different to the real houses. In an instant, and without any fanfare or beautiful lights, the purpose behind this new design became apparent, as they were in fact large boats. The ground below and around them instantly became water and they sailed for a bit. I turned around and looked at my Nan's house. It too was different, but it was stationary and large and resembled a shopping centre more than anything else. I remembered my dream task and attempted to fly into space, to find a black hole. I failed and the world started fading out. I attempted to will clarity back, but failed at that too.

I found myself in my room, and convinced I had woken up, went on my laptop. I searched (God knows why) for humans acting as animals (can't recall the exact search term). The first link I encountered was for a TV tropes page called "elephantra". I intuitively knew it was an invented word and looked at the side of my laptop to discover the charging cable was plugged in. In real life, my sister had it. (She broke her own, so, we share). My laptop was also dead in real life and this was enough to make me lucid. Sadly, I woke up (for real, this time).

Sleeping: August 8th 2015, 11 PM (UTC +7)
Awake: August 9th 2015, 7 AM (UTC +7)

Non-Dream, Non-Lucid, Lucid, FA/Possible FA

Last night, I slept at 11 PM. I'm not sure when, or if I actually had any, but I remembered there was a natural awakening. I woke up and looked at the clock (can't remember what time was it), and went back to my bed, doing some mental maths. A thing I found is that my brain activity is pretty low, I can find myself struggling to do easy equations. Soon, I drifted off to sleep with higher consciousness. (This orange part could be anywhere in this journal entry. I can't remember when I woke up in real life or had this false awakening.) I can remember a dream where I was on a floating world/island with my family/friends. The place looked great and beautiful. We were around edge of the world. I was running/flying around and such. (Too much activities to note/recall, not in chronological orders. Most of them look fairly reasonable, at least within my dreams. Would work better with mental map, if it's to list everything.) Though, not much other characters were talking/doing anything with me. (At least what I can remember) Yes, this place was place of freedom. Most things were already made possible, including flying. I decided to summon a UFO Mount to ride on and levitate freely with thoughts instead of getting wings. If you could control almost everything for personal happiness, why you wouldn't? (The world had been balanced out to prevent crimes and such.)

I can't remember too much details, especially chronological orders in that part, but I can recall the feeling when I looked down from edge of the world, seeing clouds. Whichever ways, there was this part. I was down on the ground, on a flat land. Everything looked red, dehydrated, deadly and aggressive. I was confused and tried to ask people what happened, but they ignored me. I could see tanks fighting as if this world had wars going on. I knew afterwards that the world I had been living on was just a world designed for most people. We lived there without question why we were there in first place. However, reality down here was bad. Everything was destroyed already. I questioned things in frustration. I asked one of my friends where they're going (in this case, they: those soldiers in war), what they're doing. Only to get the answer: "Where are they going? Nah. They won't tell you. You have to find out yourself." before they left me without caring for me.

Possibly in another dream, or false awakening after first paragraph. Family woke me up with smiles. I slowly went on my clock and it said 8 AM. However, I decided to continue sleeping and attempted DEILD, hoping that they thought I was not fully awake yet. (Illogical? Yes. It's not possible at all to continue acting like I'm not awake with that much movements. I used to do this when I'm too lazy to wake up, and just continue sleeping though.) I managed to drift off to my sleep, thinking that I successfully did DEILD/WILD. (A false one, yay!) I somehow found that my attempts to continue the previous dream failed, as my (false) physical body senses still co-operate. With that, I realized actions similar to sleepwalks occurred on my (false) physical body. Knowing that my family members were there, I decided to troll them around with physical body asleep, but my mind awake and seeing everything. Things were funny though. Can't remember what happened afterwards, but I finally woke up in real life. Something made me question what happened few moments ago, I did a reality check and found that this was awakening life. I looked at the clock and it said 7 AM, before I punched my pillows softly in frustration. How the hell I forgot to even think that the false awakening was illogical? Since I had been waiting for FA, thinking that it would be greatest chance for me to get lucid.

This night was one of weirdest nights so far. I can't seem to sort anything out in chronological order, while I was always able to do it all the time. Everything looked like there were run on parallel timeline. Let's think it in positive way. This might be a sign of being able to recall multiple dreams a night. Time to appreciate it and try again next night!

EDIT: I just noticed how "fabricated world" is quite something along The Matrix. I haven't watched it before this though.

early sort of vague, long BTS after a short WBTB, followed by a mega-TOTM top-5 (maybe best ever) LD

Note: I listened to PercyLucid's MILD audio class all the way through this week, and have taken up several of his suggestions and his mantra "I will have lucid dreams TONIGHT, or VERY SOON!" I do his MILD, holding a still mental image of my desired dream scene in my head as I fall asleep. I've been doing it for about half a week at this point.

Betime: midnight-ish. Glass of red wine some hours earlier (4?) at dinner. One Opti-Men multivitamin around 3-4pm.

06:11, ~3 minutes of voice notes

+ standing among statue/memorials, where the shape of the stone is a language conveying a message ("Hindu"). In particular the place where the column narrows in diameter and then widens out again has some sort of special meaning. I read "pardo" chiseled into one of the columns (they're about 4 feet high).

+ several big bags of galantamine capsules have arrived from Amazon, and a bag of small round B6 tablets. The boxes were opened (I guess by my wife), and the big see-through plastic baggies (Halloween candy bag sized) are lying there on my bed along with the Amazon invoice. The galantamine capsules are large, about the size of my current Alpha-GPC capsules (which are real horse pills, it takes eating bread/drinking water to get them down). I put some in my mouth and start chewing them? I wonder if I have time left in my dreaming night to take some or if it's too late.

Looking at the fine, thick, luxurious paper that Amazon uses for printing invoices, and the detailed high quality printing, I realized this is why I use Amazon, for this level of detail & quality.

+ circular cushion, it has to last a lifetime, one kid is jumping up and down and I severely discipline it, it gets progressively younger as I do so until it becomes an infant and rolls off on to the ground; two families different religious traditions are sharing this circular couch thing, it's OK with one family because their attention is usually focused outwards, you're not supposed in their tradition to use the middle part.

I'm wandering in and out of sleep as I review the prior dreams.

WBTB, BTS

It takes about an hour to get back to sleep it feels like. Need to put on a sleep mask as the room is too light now.

08:51, ~16 minutes of voice notes

+ LD #133 (TOTM advanced I & bonus success): KILD

I'm in a fairly dark area with people, I hear (students and teachers?) talking about math, I remember hearing "N-squared". I seem to be re-entering this area, and notice in front of me a teacher lady lying on a reclining garden/beach lounge chair, facing me. She's by herself. I go towards her, lean down over her in order to kiss her, and as my face approaches hers I get lucid. I continue in for a quick kiss on the lips and say "I'm dreaming!" I get up and head up a stairway to the left, saying "I didn't go up here last time through". There is a very wide open platform up there. Up ahead along a long wall stretching along the platform is an open door, and I enter.

Band Practice (TOTM basic I missed opportunity):
Inside is a large, wide, but not deep, well-lit band room. Most of the room is off to my left (the door is on the right edge of the room). There to the left on a series of risers are the band student musicians (seems like high school aged) sitting with their instruments. I look for a guy playing (my instrument), and see him in the 3rd/4th row up, and call to him to show me his instrument. He holds it up and I nod, "nice. What's your name?" I ask, "Norman," he answers (delay not too long, sometimes my DCs don't know their names well!). "I'll be back later" I say and head out the door, starting to think of TOTM.

Moon (TOTM Advanced-II)-fail:
I try to remember my TOTM task cheer song, and all I can remember at first is the rhythm. Argh! I finally remember the moon rock task. I decide I will grab a chunk of the moon and eat it. I look up into the night sky, slightly hazy, but with lots of distinct stars, the background is not totally black. I clearly see the stars at high resolution, and notice several satellites lazily making a straight path from one side of the vision to the other. I follow one's progress for a few seconds enjoying the view. I will the moon to appear, several times, but it does not appear.

I am now in the backyard of my childhood home, still looking up at the sky for the moon. I start to hear my mother's voice.

Mom:
I hear her voice clearly, like she was standing next to me. I know she's in the house. I'm now floating fairly high over the house looking down, and am amazed at the clarity and accuracy of her voice. Sometimes voices in my dreams do not sound right, but this is perfect. She is speaking coherently but I do not remember anything that she said, she's talking to my father. I'm trying to get down to the house and have some trouble, I have to air-swim a bit. The house is not right: it appears to be a sort of a modern, multi-section compound with rooms of differing shapes from above. Then I'm on the deck at the back door, still hearing her voice, and I enter, go through the kitchen, and expect to see her there and see her walking through the dining room heading towards the living room, her back is to me. I get really happy, finally I'm going to see her in a dream!
(in waking life she passed away two months ago).
I follow and enter the dining room, imagining her being really happy to see me. She turns and sees me and I open my arms wide, (I'm wearing a light jacket and quickly unzip it and hold up my arms with the ends of the jacket, kind of like bat wings), and she comes to me and I give her a big hug, kissing her cheek and I tell her "I really miss you!" I see her and her face clearly. She seems young. Either she or my dad answers, and says something like now it is time for me to be with my father.

Mom saves a FA:
I find myself waking, and I still hear my mother's voice. If I can still hear her voice, that means I'm still dreaming! I have no visuals and decide to slowly "open my eyes." I seem to be in my childhood home's living room still, with something on my head, like sheets or a blanket. I sit up and stand up. I try for a little bit while walking forwards towards the kitchen to take the thing off that feels like a towel wrapped around my head, but I can't get it off, it's like a really really long sheet is hanging there and I just can't get it off. I decide just ignore it (and then it stops bothering me). My mother is standing at the doorway between the dining room and the living room just on the kitchen side. She looks really young, thin, healthy, and happy. Shes wearing a bright lipstick, orange-ish. I say "you look like you're doing great!" while I stand close to her with my hands on her waist, and something like "we will meet again!".

Dinos! (TOTM Advanced-I success):
After seeing my mother, I go out on the deck and ask my sister to take me to show me where the dinosaurs are
(asking DCs to do stuff for me is fast becoming my favorite dream control method).
She takes me to the corner of the deck and I look down and see weird beasts walking down the stairs to the backyard lawn (in particular notice one big black quadruped freaky looking thing walking down). I go down off the end of the deck and mount some small furry thing that I think is actually a movie monster of some sort. I'm a bit concerned about this not counting since I don't think this is a dinosaur. I ride it down the stairs to the lawn. There I imagine and see a medium-sized Trex there battling with a medium-sized King Kong. They're both between 15-20 feet tall: definitely big, but not immense. I jump and land expertly on the back of the T-rex. I imagine a faintly strange beastly odor. I'm sitting fairly high on its back/lower neck, and urge it forward to run up the stairs because I'm concerned about Kong. I urge it and imagine it running really fast, I'm "pushing" it forwards by "pushing on the reins" and it's leaping up the stairs towards the street but it just doesn't get going fast enough to please me, Kong is still chasing. Up on the street Kong attacks and I jump/fall away...

Black Hole (TOTM Bonus, success):
... and (am in the void? Rub hands for a while, feel them, dream is solid, visuals return), I'm in a garage (childhood home?), I exit and turn to the right (180 degrees) and there is a large open plaza full of college-aged young people ahead of me. I try again to remember the full TOTM cheer song and I again can only remember the 2nd half (advanced) and "...Black Hole! Black Hole! Raa raa Raa!" I've already done one advanced, so why not? I decided to summon a black hole and jump in. I walk forwards a bit to get where the crowd starts, I hold out my hands straight in front of me and pull them apart quickly, imagining a massive black sphere appearing: instead something big dark and round flashes and disappears. OK, again! (I wonder what the students will think of the black hole!) I put my arms together, pull them apart quickly, and this time a large sphere appears solidly before me which I know is the black hole. Only it's partially reflective mirror-surfaced, which I think is fine because everybody knows that light plays funny tricks around black holes. I dive forwards into it and try to feel the sensations. I don't feel much, after a brief disorientation I find that I'm inside a sphere sort of like a one-way mirror, I can see out but people can't see in. There is a filtering effect looking out like sunglasses. The party is going on all around me in the plaza still and everyone is ignoring me. The black hole is about the same size inside as outside (about 8-10 feet in diameter, tall enough to stand in). There's a girl standing near the edge of the black hole on the outside and I pull her in (and kiss her?). The dream wavers/I enter a bit of the void and call for a DC to take my hand and pull me out, and "John" does just that, and the dream continues from there...

John and boobs:
I asked for a DC to take me by the hand and lead me from the Black Hole sphere, and a guy does grab my hand firmly and lead me out. We start walking together, I decide his name is "John." As we're walking through the crowd, a girl comes towards us .

Spoiler for sexy stuff:

I grab her and hold her by the shoulders and sort of push her along in front of us (she seems slightly uncooperative but doesn't make a fuss), I start squeezing her boobs through her clothing. Double handed at first with my left arm around her back. Then I decide to let John have the left boob and tell him to take it and I stick with the right one. I think I stripped her top off or at least exposed her breasts, but I was on purpose not staring at her so as to keep the dream going and it seemed to work great. Then we approach a table with some other people mulling around, and decide to have sex with her together with John, hoist her up on the table and the dream fades. In the void. I try an interesting variant on "hand rubbing" and start pulling my "ahem." Definitely feels like dream body, so I'm still dreaming. It gets longer and longer, and seems fairly small diameter, but seems to be getting a bit hard. I want John to help me enter the girl.

Eventually I have John take my hand again and lead me back into the dream, works again, visuals return. I look at and touch briefly the edge of the table. Then I leave them both and move on down the path.

Girl outside:
I've lost a bit of lucidity, I'm standing outside a door to a building, as I move towards it a girl sitting on a bench calls to me "<redacted>" which gets my attention.

Spoiler for sexy stuff:

I instantly kneel down in front of her and pull off her pants. Looking at her sex organs it seems to waver to look male for a bit, I will it to return to girl and it does and I begin oral on her. I begin moving my tongue enthusiastically and start to feel the connection superimposed with my waking tongue

and this brings me back to full lucidity. I stop with her and enter the door in to the building.

Girl inside:
Inside is a large mostly empty space, I spot two girls sitting at a desk not far away. I head right for them and sit down, noticing the girl on the left and give her my attention.

Spoiler for sexy stuff:

As I sit down I reach for her body and rub her torso a little bit with my two hands. I'm close to her face and I look at her and appreciate her beauty and lean in for a kiss, I feel it well. I try for some tongue but again it starts to superimpose with my waking tongue so I stop that. I kiss her again with just lips, short, but really nice.

I move my gaze to look back up over my shoulder to the my left so as not to stare at her too long, I catch a scene of some busy detail outside the door I came in through.

I stand up quickly and take her hand and lead her away, just desiring to be in motion. I'm holding her left hand with my right, and I start swinging our arms while we walk. <Something about a vending machine?> The dream starts to fade and I use contact with the girl to come back and continue a bit:

Spoiler for sexy stuff:

I stick my right ring finger in her mouth and push it in and out a bit, I feel the warmth and wetness of her mouth. Then the same with my middle finger then the same with my index finger, telling her to really suck hard and she does.

This brings me back into the dream. I then get the great idea to

Spoiler for sexy stuff:

repeat with my (ahem), I place it in her mouth and tell her to suck hard, I start to feel it and I see her face down there with my (ahem) in her mouth

and the dream fades, this time it feels like for good, so I start gathering my recall and prepare to record.

Finally! After two weeks of trying to lucid dream once again, I finally have another one. As usual, I woke up before sunrise and went back to sleep, reminding myself to do reality checks if I dream.

The Dream

The dream started off as a false awakening nightmare. I was lying on my bed in the dark and there were these figures in the shadow talking about how much they hate me because all my weaknesses and insecurities. They talked about how much they hated me and that my roommates are trying to kick me out because they are starting to dislike me. Then I tell myself to stay calm - this is just a dream.

I floated on up and out of my bed to use the bathroom. I did another reality check by looking at my hands. My fingers were deformed; it must be a dream then because my fingers aren't broken in real life. I looked into the bathroom mirror and saw that my hair was gray and my skin was wrinkly; this must be a dream since I'm much younger in real life. I jumped and try to fly, but could not - it felt too real. Next, I decided to open the closet. I tried to imagine something magical. But there wasn't: There was a teddy bear on the top rack and a glass of red wine in the lower one.

I was apprehensive about drinking the wine since I don't know what will happen after. Why did my subconscious offer me a teddy bear and a glass of red wine? Why did I turn into an old man with deformed hands? I don't know what possessed me about I held the large wine glass with two hands, bowed to the closet, and gulped it down as though it were an antidote. I blanked out.

Dream Signs: Looking into the mirror. Hand/finger check. Nightmare.

Interpretation: A very literal reflection of my fears and insecurities.

Was in my work place with a college he was asking about my brothers (who are married now) as if they were still boys - I looked at him pondering and then said" this is strange, I must be dreaming" - I became Lucid
As I stared at him aware he was a DC he changed from being a college into a strange man and his face kept changing..." What do you represent to me?" I asked
He didn't answer but his face started to melt. I repeated the question loosing lucidity for a bit as I did so - but then then I noticed small spontaneous fires starting up in quite a few spots across and around the room ( a sewing room so there is lots to burn!) This made me realise I was dreaming again although I tried to put the fire out at first ha ha. I turned back to the DC and he was laughing at me wildly " Tell me what you represent!" I shouted - I can see I got a bit too involved here and ended up back in my physical - I am not Usually so interested in DC's but this one really hooked me in- lol


A few false awakenings this mornings also but only realising after - one where I had a good bit of awareness tho ; a little girl playing nearby to where I lay " can you see me?" I asked
" Yes - I can see you " She answered
I had asked because the boarder wasn't clear as to whether I was awake or asleep...could still feel my physical world but also knew other world was close by by hearing it - not seeing.
After she had answered I tried gently to turn my head to see her in an effort to join the dream world but my physical body was woken then too much!

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID

I remember laying in my bed at my dad's house. By the white light coming from the window in front of me, I could tell that it was morning. I also noticed something else in front of me. A black shape. It looked like a silhouette because of the light behind it. However, it did look like a person.

The thing talked. It was my brother. I did a nose plug RC just to make sure I wasn't dreaming. At first, I didn't realize it. But I had breathed like it was nothing. I was dreaming! I was now aware that Sam was in my other sister's bed beside me. She was awake, talking to my brother.

I had to keep myself calm. "This is a dream." I said to myself out loud.
I tried to get up out of my bed, but, it was as if there was a hundred pound weight on my chest. I could barely move one way or the other. I didn't want to try too hard, either, for fear of "breaking" the dream.

So I tried to through expectation. I looked over to Sam, however, I could barely see her because my fixed neck wouldn't allow me to look that far. "Sam," I said, "I can get up out of bed, right?"

I saw her look over at me, "Uh, yeah." she said with a snort.

I tried to get up, but to no avail. I was glued to the bed. I tried again.

"Sam, I can get up, right?" I said with more force.

"Yes!" she hissed.

I tried again. I was actually able to get up this time, but very, very slowly. I also found myself unable to lift up my head at all. It was as if I looked down at my navel and my neck became fixed in that position.

Frustration overcame me as I slowly made my way around the bed. Suddenly, it felt like something was pulling me back towards the bed, like a magnet. I tried to escape it, but within a split second, I found myself back in my bed in the same position.

"I am DREAMING." I said a little louder. "I have control!"

I flicked my eyes over to my brother, who was still, creepily, standing in my doorway.

"Hey, can you help me get up?" I asked.

I saw him move a little, but he didn't come near me. I sighed. I tried to think of something that I could use to almost "gravitate" my body towards. For some reason I thought of my computer charger. It seemed to work, and I was suddenly beside my bed with the charger in my hand. However, one of the ends was snapped off, revealing open wire.

I don't know why, but an urge overcame me to put it in my mouth. I did, and a small electric shock coursed through my body that started in my tongue. It scared me at first, but I wanted to try again. I did, and held it for longer. It was a very weak electric shock that tingled my tongue, and I could almost imagine the individual currents that were running throughout my mouth and down my spine.

I tried to take a step forward, but suddenly, I found myself back in my own bed again. I silently cursed. I had to do something even more rough to get myself out of this predicament, but I didn't want to end the dream entirely by doing it.

While I was still thinking about it, the dream ended.

A series of FAs where I am trying to fall asleep while a DC keeps distracting me so I can't seem to transition. After a few more FAs, I realize the previous ones were actually dreams so should have already acted there.

Scene change, some on and off lucidity scenario with family members at grandma.

Inanimate object - blanket lady

A bit later, I get a wave of really strong awareness and remember thanks to reading other people's reports the inanimate object task. There is a blanket so I lift it up with some sort of thought control and say hello. I begin to laugh and it answers me with a creepy echo laughter. Moreover, it turns and twists and becomes the upper part of an 18th century woman. In the dream I try to memorize the shape to eventually draw it later on.

Clone

After this I take quite a while trying to remember any other tasks. I am even overly concerned that all this strain will certainly end the dream, but luckily it doesn't and I recall the clone task. I try to think about myself while turning around but nothing happens. I decide to half close my eyes, risking the dream disappearing while thinking of an image of myself but again nothing happens. Finally, I decide to open the door and expect to see her/me there. This seems to work and I finally meet her. We go into the corridor where there are a number of somewhat harassing DCs and then into the kitchen. I have no idea what to do with my clone though, so we just walk around from room to room until her features change.

Then I spot Gordon Ramsay who looks very tired and I try to talk to him. Fluctuations in lucidity, rises up again while I speak to him. He asks if I can hear him well. There are distortions in the direction of the sound for a moment. The alarm wakes me up.

First false awakening

I woke up in the middle of the night. Everything was dark all around, so I turned the lights on, took my laptop and turned it on. I started to write some code - it was a quasi C++ mixed up with Python and Java. Then I started to compile it. The effect was instant - somehow, the code was working. I saved all the files, turned laptop off and went back to bed.

Second false awakening

I woke up on a sofa in the living room. I quickly standed up and went to my bedroom through the kitchen. The room layout was normal, though most of furniture were moved to different places, and the lights were working weirdly. When turned on, they lit only a spot in the middle of the room, leaving the rest of it dark. When entering my bedroom, everything disappeared and I was left in void. After a three seconds or so, I could move freely, as if there was an invisible floor. Suddenly, a group of men and women appeared, making an orgy. I joined them. When I was just about to finish, my room appeared again, this time with my friend and another dude. He said "You like wanking, eh?" I just took some clothes from the wardrobe and went to take a shower. After that, I wanted to go to sleep, but I had to go to a sofa, as my bed was taken by someone else.

Third false awakening

I woke up in my bed in the early morning. I was going to do what I always do in those situations - stand up from bed, drink something (tea or water preferable), go to toilet, and go back to bed, ending 4-6 minute WBTB. This time however, on the way to toilet I met my mother. I asked "When do I have to go for drivers license ride?" She said "Half past seven." I said "I thought it was half past five." Then she replied "No, it's half past seven. Do your thing and get back to bed!" Then I finished the cycle.

Really? I haven't posted here in 4 days? Wow I'm slipping! A fairly great night, finally, both LDs and fairly good recall.

00:00 (approximate) bedtime

02:00? (unknown) get up to pee
takes a while (10-15 minutes?) going back to sleep, I repeat "the next time I'm dreaming, I realize that I'm dreaming" to myself while falling asleep

04:16

+ LD #129 (first recalled dream of the night is a lucid, that is a first for me I think!) I'm in an international airport connecting flight area/border control, some of our group is down the long (curving?) hallway at the border control. I see my other travelling mates with their suitcases, I don't have mine, I realize I've left my suitcase on the previous airplane. I panic, what will I do, there is only 15 (25?) minutes for the connection, and I'd have to re-cross border controls/customs, they may not let me through. I decide I must go back for it, and start running fast. I think without the suitcase I'll have (no clothing?) for the (camp?) we're going to. I'm running really fast and am really concerned, when I get the notion that maybe there's no reason to worry if this is a dream, I do a nose pinch while running and it clearly indicates dream. I'm lucid and still running, part of what got me lucid perhaps was the fast speed I was running, completely effortlessly, and I'm amazed for a moment at this.

Spoiler for sexually explicit:

Pretty much all caveman all the rest of the dream. The first few encounters I don't recall. Then I see some women standing among a line of trees/border in between rows of a parking lot (outdors, night). One of them I "remember" having the hots for, she's middle-aged but hot so I go up to her and present myself for a BJ, she says "with what, all your two inches!?" I'm sort of annoyed but ignore it and get a BJ for a while. Then she takes off her top and her bra and she has an odd flat chest. I move on. I meet a young man with glasses and he takes off his shirt (and bra?) and also has an odd looking chest, I move on since I'm not into guys.

I come upon a car full of Asian (Japanese?) people, there is a Japanese couple (man & woman) right there and I grab the woman by the shoulders and say "excuse me, I'll just take her" and pull her to the side and get going on a BJ, she kneels down in front of me and I think "yes this is a very good position, I should do this more!" and she gets going really well, really fast, it feels great, (a smartphone is involved somehow?), I think I may be able to climax soon. Then I look up and see some women standing nearby (I'm kneeling now?) and choose an Indian woman and reach up under her shirt and squeeze and pull one of her boobs (she has a slightly exasperated expression on her face) and

the dream ends/transitions.

+ LD #130 FA in bed (false dream home), on a high bed-stand next to us I see a white sleep/lucid dreaming mask with little LED lights on stalks, my wife reaches for and is handling/talking about this her "favorite" of my sleep masks, I'm concerned that she'll see it's more than just a sleep mask. I'm starting to suspect, then when I see my wife, who's still looking down at me, is floating up to the ceiling and bouncing around there I get lucid and a clear nose pinch confirms it. She's really bright, clear, shining, and beautiful. I notice/say "Hey you're young and hot, let's (get it on) like we used to" and I

Spoiler for sexually explicit:

reach up and massage her breasts through her top, and pull her down and lay her on her back on the bed, and (pull down our pants?) and begin intercourse (it's a vague sensation).

About this time I notice out the window on the street below (we're about the 3rd floor) across the street a military/security vehicle, white and cube-like and open like a jeep with some triangular insignia on the driver door (facing me) is pulling up and stops, I look away so that this will not distract me from the sex. During the sex I look down again and see there's a man and young woman in the jeep, I meet the eyes of the young woman and decide to show off, I point to my sexual activity and give the woman two thumbs up, she nods and returns a gesture and makes a kind of humping motion to indicate she understands.

My "wife" at this point seems like some sort of mechanical construction and the sex is unsatisfying, and then another of my wife enters the room with some things in her hands and indicates we need to choose some poster to put in to the plastic folder hanging off of the bed (it's somehow to please our cat?).

+(f) kissing a DC (redacted)

(later)
+ semi-epic multi-scene long: at the basketball level of childhood neighborhood park:
1) watching fencing competition, I'm standing on the sloping road leading down to that level looking down. I admire the performance of a friend of mine, the fancy thrusts he makes. Afterwards, I go down and want to meet him and imagine holding his foils in my hand and what sort of grip they have (there are two of them). I then move to the far side of the level and want to enter the hot tubs with the other competitors, at first there is force/gravity/wind that blows me a bit to the exit road leading down to the street but I recover and enter the hot tubs and have an animated chat about something.

2) a vicious angry dog is gripping the back of my pants on the belt, I'm trying to placate/distract it to get away. I reach around to pet it (nervous about getting bitten), pet it, speak soothingly towards it, I'm walking up the path to the middle level. Back down on the basketball level there are containers of (breakfast cereals?) on the retainer wall and I scatter some treats down on the ground and this distracts the dog.

3) I'm walking back towards the road to the middle level and see along the right a table of free cookies and other things, I think how great it is to work here to have these treats all the time. I'm looking at the cookies and take some into my hand, some look like big round really dark chocolate brownies, they're soft. Across the table I see a chocolate and red velvet muffin that looks awesome and I go around to get it, but some guy reaches for it as soon as I get there. Next to it is a full chocolate/red velvet cake so I quickly pick it up and put it on my (dirty with chocolate crumbs/sauce) plate to cut a piece before anybody can grab it, and I push it round a bit with my finger to get it in to the right position. The red velvet dude chastises me for touching the cake with my fingers which I thought I wouldn't have had to do if he hadn't have grabbed the muffin I wanted in the first place.

+ I'm moving down S avenue towards HC childhood home, the house on the left at the big right turn is being demolished and I'm surprised to see only the brick skeleton remaining among the ruins. On HC facing my childhood home, I see both the L's house to the left and the G's house to the right have new construction on them (new dreamsign, 3rd, 4th time this has happened recently). The L's house has new levels and some towers added on top, and the G's house is not much higher but the front has been completely redone and is has a lot of fancy details and decorations on the exterior walls. I'm looking carefully to see if new levels have been added and it seems like about 1/2 of a level has been added on the left wing. I'm amazed at how fast that appeared because this is the first time I'm seeing it, I ask my parents when did that happen, how did it change so quickly?

08:45

+(f) with financial advisers and parents, tell dad he should sell some stocks or other investments, he's hesitant

+(f) stuck in some stairway exiting a parking garage at a security station, there's a flat wide locked metal barrier (sort of like an ironing board but rectangular) a guy helps me out, a small lift lowers down I put a foot on it and ride it up, he says I stood on the wrong part of the lift, I don't care

+(f) (vague) (DO?) guy says to parent "you're the one who's going to kill him, so go you go first" (gesturing to the Tribes inventory station)

Black: non-dream
Blue: non-lucid
Red: lucid

Dream 1: Hangin out with Lloyd
I remembered heaps of this dream but then forgot it 90% of it -.-.
It was a slice of life kind of dream, really nice and vibrant, it seemed to take place at my primary schools grassy field. I was hanging out with friends on a nice bright summer day and I see my friend Lloyd. He hasn't spotted me yet and I haven't seen him for some time now, so I decide to go surprise him. I can't remember how I surprised him but we all laughed and then played some sort of sporty game, the whole thing was a blast.

Dream 2: Insect zoo or something...
I was walking down a corridor in a dimly lit hall, it was about 3 metres wide and everything was wooden to give off a 'nature-like' feel for its insect residents. The insects were behind several large glass panes that stretched up across a cross-section of a tree, of which there were 3 in my immediate vision. Candice and another guy who's name I forgot were looking at them with interest (they're geologists who specialise in fossils of trees and stuff), the guy said "oh there's actually a real one".. I glanced at what they were observing, I could make out the fake plastic giant insects (the size of a hand in length and quite thick, they had furryish bodies and large insect wings), but as I inspected closer I saw something else... The realism in the dream changed and suddenly things were sharper in detail, the insect I was now looking at was huge, it was nearly half a metre and appeared to be a queen... I could clearly make out the hairs on its body and see how its body quivered and vibrated with internal resonance, at this point I think I woke up...

After waking from this dream I felt funny, I couldn't move and I felt a sharp pain in my lower back, to which I immediately thought was the result of a giant bug biting me
I quickly shook of the sleep paralysis in the first few seconds though but still felt uncomfortable, I felt normal though. I then lay back down and cemented the dream in my mind and went back to bed. At which point I had a false awakening thinking there were spiders and bugs crawling all over me, I hopped out of bed and shook them all off, it was scary! Then I actually woke up...

It was a warm morning. I went out of my bed, took some clothes and went to a kitchen. Looking through the window, I saw a black car parked in the middle of backyard. I saw that someone was coming out from the car: a pretty, blonde woman in early thirties - my previous teacher. She was wearing only short trousers and her brea. She was holding flowers in her hands, she looked at me and smiled.