non-lucid

Well, I just found this page by watching a youtube video that talked about Timeicos dreams and I realized that one of my dreams has several characteristics of that kind of dreams, I saw that someone had made a thread with similar dreams but I have not found it, however I want to tell you about this weird dream I had.

I was around 4 or 5 years old, I don't remember being sick or taking any medication, so I had this dream on a random night. The dream was about a black space, as if all the light had been absorbed, however I felt no fear, there was my 5 year old self in that space and on my sides were both my parents and my maternal and paternal grandparents, divided, but all whispering to me to pick up a crumb, I listened to them, I lifted the crumb and immediately the crumb became too big, it was too big, I thought it would crush me but immediately my arm began to swell and enlarge just as it did with the crumb, my whole body became huge, the vision was a bit grotesque and disconcerting. But that's not the end of the dream, the whole scenario was erased, it was like a change of camera because the dream stopped focusing on me, now it focused on a brick wall, I do not remember if it had color or was black and white, and out of nowhere came a sphere, it looked like a wrecking ball but it looked too spherical and without the chain that holds it, it seemed to hang by a thread, it moved slowly but it hit the small brick wall too hard collapsing it.
I don't remember the exact order of the dream, if it was the crumb or the wrecking ball first, but I remember it was like floating in the nothingness but at the same time stepping on solid ground, it was so strange, there was no light but I could see, there was no music, no sounds, only those strange whispers, I don't remember what I did when I woke up, but I remember dreaming more times about that dream, during I was 8-10 years old too, when I was 13 years old, the memory of that dream stopped being in my subconscious and passed to be in my conscious, from that moment I have had the knowledge and memories of that dream

Fragment:

Me, Jasmine, and our dad's were in a Jeep Grand Cherokee with leather seats. My dad was driving recklessly and scaring the shit out of me.


Fragment:

I chased a mouse under my bedroom door?

Fragment:

I was running across the top of a waterfall. Bullets were flying. One hit a tree right next to my face.

Fragment:

I had a house. I knew it was mine, but it looked different from my actual house. It didn't have a garage and I remember wandering around looking for my car.

I had a vivid dream of boarding a futuristic space elevator with two other people I knew. Well, more like "strap in", as it was a kind of open carriage, and you were sitting down but only secured to it with seatbelts. The elevator started moving, faster and faster along the thin cable, and before long the sky started to get darker. I actually felt my body becoming weightless. But it wasn't because we reached space. The elevator "leveled off", and reached... a floating city in the sky. It was a beautiful city with beautiful classical architecture. For a moment, my rational faculties were awake enough for me to wonder how they managed to built they fully-populated city, if the space elevator technology was supposed to be new. After all, we were on its maiden trip... But in the end I just shrugged and explored the city.

Later that day, I got a Facebook "Memories" notification reminding me I shared a video about a future space elevator exactly 10 years ago.

Pharmascene
Beats blast. Patrons dance. Fluorescents flicker in time. This is a pharmacy, not a dance club. I am the only soul irritated by this apothecary party. When transactions are complete, finally feel a festive pull. Dive fully into the dance.

Graduation
Presentation complete. Gifted safety pins for our shoes, we disperse. Cousin Angel's unzipped lips cast unhinged spells. She is lost. Cousin Darla and her only son invite me to the beach. Strangers find it in their hearts to help. Beach is found. Lot is a confusion of cars. Cavort through chaos. My safety pin is sacrificed to see the beach.

Mouthful
Called to a prominent meeting of minds. Words can not be wound by a tongue caked with gum. Pull. Stretch. Peel. Scrape. The mass is an unending mess of stretching strands. It rips free, finally. Greeted by a fleshy mass of tongue locking glop. It is alive! Kick it to the ditch. After it all, attend the assembly in silence, still.

Lofty
Unprepared for what the teacher whips us with, two are banished to the roof. My companion, a seeming sleek 50s model, sits, smiles, studies. I amble past pillars and benches bare. Our teacher! He is John Rhys-Davies, slick in suit yet somehow still stout and angular as a son of Gloin. "They will see us!" he yells. Shoved to stones. Crushed by a shield of flesh and bone. Can't breathe. And then... all is well. Sit for a spell. 50's beauty and I soak in the sanctity of lofty lessons.

Re-membered
Bare as the day I was born, relish the rush of steam and shower. What games were played? Can not recall. My team mates names? Can not recall. It does not matter. I am one. I am now. Sing and savor this hissing stall. Too soon comes a curious reality. Pants can not fit. Enormously endowed with a member of mammoth proportions, I panic. Half naked, trapped, distorted. Wish only for the safe and shielding shambles of my home.

(Sept 23)
Remnants of scholars trickle softly through shadow swept halls. Bodies brush past one another but thoughts soar through scattered elsewheres. Trials are documented and cast upon white washed walls for all to see in the heart of a great hall. A friend finds me. Sits close. Closer. Lean on my shoulder. Slip under my arm. I am too weary to care but drape her in what comfort that my half embrace can give.

I think the overall idea of this dream is that I was going in and out of consciousness and explaining elements of my dreams to... Someone I was sharing a bed with? Documentary style??? One such element was a modification of either dph or heroin popular in the 4chan trans community that made the user hear an ominous text to speech voice followed by a feeling of intense dread and paralysis. The greek goddess Artemis herself took control of my body after I woke up, sat at the edge of the bed, turned on the lights, grasped her head and expressed grief and righteous parental concern at the idea of anyone doing that to herself. A lot of this part of the dream involved strategically looking at nothing and smothering my face in darkness so as to reduce the effect. At some other point after I fell back asleep in the dream, I was at what was supposedly the watt/I-80 station dropping off/making sure a housemate was alright to get where she needed to be. I told her of the similarities this scene had to the last dream, although the last dream was a nightmare and my housemate had a legit knife instead of a butter knife in her hand. We were overlooking a lake on a bridge. After taking the elevator down and avoiding eye contact with anything not directly in front of me, I hop onto the train back to... Watt/I-80? The point is I was taking the blue line back to the station near my house (which isn't that one). A fare inspector came by despite my expectation that since it was so early in the morning I'd be off the hook. He looked like my second year community college sociology professor and I noted the gorgeous frozen lake sunset scenery just as my zip pass randomly got deleted. He told me I had to get off and I said that was fine because this was my next stop. What should have been Watt/I-80 West or the one before that was "West Antarctic Station". I got off at a frozen riverbank where no train tracks appeared to be present. The river opened into the same gorgeous lake I pointed out to the fare inspector and I was officially stranded while waiting for the next train.

My girlfriend was in this dream somewhere at some point but I couldn't tell you where. There were also points in the dream where I got off at a bus stop at a corner store near an intersection in an otherwise nature-y area.

Funny couple days. Day 1 i was making a supper. For some reason the Jamie voice likes to bug me while I'm trying to cook. " You're doing that wrong... That's too much!!! You cut those too big!" First of all I ask how she would even know what I am doing? She always answers that she can see it in her mind. I always say you're not here to eat it, so let me do it my way.

Also the brake pads on my car are going so I'm not delivery driving until they are fixed. My dad has work for now.

Jamie 1

A quick flash of Jamie standing over a stove, eating out of a pot. Apparently it's supposed to be what I made. She smiles at me while eating it.

Jamie 2

A quick flash of her in a wheelchair. She's rolling towards me. Hm I hope this isn't a real thing.

Next night: nothing.

Yesterday, possible drive by when it was getting dark. I was talking to her voice outside and heard, " I really wanna see you." I heard a car slow down by me house, so I walked to see. It was super dark. A grey car drove by and in the passenger seat I saw a head turn to look at me. But it was so dark and fast I couldn't make the person out. The head turn was like her though.

Like I said, I don't mind if she does this. Just please make sure I can clearly see her. I wanna see her too. It does help validate to me what I'm going through on this blog. So don't be sneaky or disguise herself.

Jamie 3?

I was in a gas station store, that had a McDonald's in it or something. A familiar woman went to the glass door. Her hair was dyed light purple. I thought it was Zoe from when I worked with Jamie, Z worked at the same place. The woman recognized me and she seemed to be holding back tears. Zoe was another "friend." From that time (not as close), who suddenly turned on me when I was going through my dark night of the soul. So I reacted in the dream as if it was Zoe.

She started to say something but I cut her off with. " What, you're suddenly going to talk to me after 13 years? We were good friends and you dropped me without explanation, and I'm supposed to just accept you back?"

The woman took a step back. She said, "I'm going to kill myself." And it sounded like Jamie's voice. And she turned and ran out the door. I was going to follow her and apologize, but I woke up.

Yeah, I guess I'm going to have to be very careful with my words. I'm pretty sure it was Jamie in the dream. Unfortunately, the way I described Zoe also applies to her. I do acknowledge that Jamie at least, tried to explain. Just not very well.

I woke up and realized I had fallen asleep and didn't finish my prayers. I had started and dosed off. The Jamie voice was there , but quiet. We eventually talked about it somewhat and agreed to finish my long list of prayers. I added to not let us be prisoners to the pain of our past. There's a line about love in Corinthians somewhere in the Bible that says something like, "Love keeps no records of wrongdoings." While what I said to Zoe in the dream applies to Jamie, and I do indeed feel that way sometimes. That is a worthy goal to strive for. It's almost humanly impossible to forget. That's why I'm going to rely on Jesus and shut my mouth if Jamie comes to me in person with something to say.

Bull

I was in the lobby of a hotel checking on my business cards. I noticed the display tray was emptied. So I went to get more cards. When I got back there was a menacing bull with big horns in my way. I made sure I wasn't carrying anything red, so that it wouldn't charge at me.

Other small dreams involved something about a McDonald's franchise owner was meeting with a man who owned a bar franchise, or something.... Idk

One dream seemed to involve the lady from Our of the box. Hey, they haven't called me in weeks... I'm to shy to call them now.

Driven
Circle side-winding streets. Curse shape-shifting signs. Neath my wheels the living lines glitch with murderous glee. Snared in this slippery scene I drive... drive... am driven mad.

Thunder Hearts
A cat says, "A dog once said that hearts are tough, like thunder." We part ways. I can do nothing but wander, ponder, wonder.

Ember
Why does time, in all its wisdom, not stamp out our stubborn spark? Despise the flighty smolder that swells when our souls trip into each other. Fight? Flight? Freeze? Fawn? Want these basic embers gone. Employ fifth F... facade. Walk behind the ancient, unmoved mask. Let me lust fires fairer than this.

Constellation
Here we stand in surging lands of bullies, baggage, and ramblers. Our trek has forked. Our birds take flight. We soar into opposite nights. I am leery, lonely, lost. I wish you well. I wish you grace. I wish you find your perfect place. Only moon and stars connect us now. We have become the constellation Chrysalis.

Dreams from September 19th.

A Shell
Grave golden. Veins shriveled. Spirits ragged, as jagged as the twisting, turning trails. Bare soles scrape cross banks and beds of iridescent disaster. Suffer glorious torture. Search for salvation in but one unfragmented shell.

Show
Seduced by gaudy glimmers and fair fueled glee. Contraptions groan. Barkers yip. Music ebbs and flows, drowns out crows, cats, and other creeping souls... like me. Dare we sink into the shoddy arms of pendulums and scramblers?

Old one!

1. (Fragment)

Lucid - although I barely remember. I stand at my kitchen counter in blue darkness, my mum on the other side, and pinch my nose for a reality check. It fails, and I know that I am dreaming - I wonder faintly how to keep my mum from finding out.

2.

I dream a song - it is a rap or more accurately, spoken. I recall hearing it in full, with distinct rhythm and what felt to be profoundly meaningful words, though I can't remember much now.

When I think of Amy Wine/
_.._.._/
_.._..and/
Laid the foundations/
Of beauty...

The song resounds in my mind as I fly over the city and the rooftops, feeling like a shooting star. The sky fades between several hazy, painted landscapes - sunsets, mornings - beaming light and colour. They are by her - she was an artist, surely.

3.

I am walking through the streets around my home - touring someone around, perhaps - perhaps I am experiencing a TV show about my area. It feels like that - like I'm not really here. Someone else's voice in my head explains to me what I'm seeing. I pass down a cobbled street, introducing the viewer to the pastry factory on the other side of the street - although it looks like a warehouse it makes the best cakes, and they're cheap! (IRL in its supposed location there is in fact a small film studio - it does look like a warehouse.) It's evening and the sky is indigo with a blurry slice of cold yellow at the bottom. I am heading home with a spring in my step - it should be almost dinnertime.

Once I'm back in my room, I reach for something on my desk and it's not there - strange - only a gap. This makes me feel odd so I move a few other objects to fill the space and placate my suspicions. When I look over to my bedside table, too, things I thought would be there are missing. My confusion grows and I rearrange some trinkets and ornaments so it looks normal, to take my mind off the weirdness.

I check my phone; I have an email notification. My parents were discussing my always being late and what they should do about it (??). It seems I was late to dinner tonight and my dad's response was to confiscate loads of my belongings. I can't believe he'd do this without even telling me, and the next thing I find missing, I storm out to confront him about it. I can't remember his response.

4. (Fragment)

An attic dimly lit with blue light. Open cardboard boxes are about, books stacked inside. There is a bookshelf against the back wall opposite the door and a small window in the slant of the roof.

Notes:

- More technology.
- Dream music! Who else has this happened to?
- Seems like a trend (with my last lucid dream) that despite being lucid I don't want DCs to know I'm dreaming or see me do anything abnormal. I really wonder why...

Went home early today, started feeling tired but not sick. I can't do consistent 10-14 hour days like I know some ppl do.

Night off I decided to focus on the Jamie voice. If it's really her we had a good time and my dreams reflected that. Last 2 nights no dreams of Jamie.

Jamie 1

Just a flash of slow dancing with her in a bar. The song sounded country... Blech!! But we were enjoying ourselves and started kissing.

Jamie 2

I was in a park with Jamie. I was laying down and she got on me and started dry humping me. Lol. The image of it was funny. What if there's kids around?

I can't remember my other dreams very well. One was in a large building.

I find focusing on Jamie more instead of other things increases the frequency of dreams.

Foragers
Sisters three are starved. The fragrance of free food will not be ignored. Two weave past stops and through shops to find their fare. Third parts with bills to get her fill.

Cousin Son
I am a parent. Cousin becomes son. His mind, a masterpiece of meandering whims. A slave to his senses. He heeds with his eyes. His face must be forced toward my own before he will hear my voice. Aunt rescues him back from the mean hearted methods that must be used to maintain his composure.

Bee-ing.
Pick about posies. Sweep all shapes of bees into tiny jars. So caught up in the chore that the shire can't be seen past a handbasket of bees.