non-lucid

Jamie dreams are kinda back? They are few and far in between but still somehow consistent. She might have done a drive by I was brushing off my car. A grey car turned in the alley by my house behind me. It felt like someone was looking at me. I turned and saw part of a head with brown hair and sunglasses. The voice mentioned it may have been her. If so, this is becoming more often. She's getting braver.

Jamie 1

I was in a long non lucid dream that was boring. Me and Jamie met in the middle of the dream. We both briefly talked about the plot of the dream we were in and moved on. Can't remember what was said or the rest.

unsure?

I was in... I'm not sure I had an ipad or something. I was selecting music. The band: Helloween, came to mind. Couldn't figure out if I wanted to hear, "Eagle fly free." or, "Dr. Stein." but then the tablet menu went funny and I couldn't find it. The tablet was suddenly hanging by string around a girl's neck. It was now a white board that we could write messages on. Not sure if this was Jamie or not.

Fighting

I was with a younger guy also named. "Raven." (Not my other dream friend. who does healing songs and stuff.) He was the native guy I ran into one day in the Wal-Mart parking lot when Jamie was giving me a ride home. In the dream he was getting mouthy. So I pounded his face in for a bit. Then I said something like, "Respect your elders." or something and he backed off.

More fighting

I think me and Jamie were in a fortnite game or something. We were walking through a valley and someone shot at us. Jamie got knocked and she was doing the crawl. The shooter grappled over to us with his duo. He told me to Res her so he can kill her again. I said, "If you kill her I will definitely find you and kill you." We went back and forth a few times like that and he backed down.

New fortnite season tomorrow. I have a love/hate relationship with that game. Mainly hate the cringe and the super toxic community.

Jamie again

This morning after our bedtime sweet talk session we often have in our heads. I was in an HH dream she was there. She made lasagna and offered me some.

I enjoyed that dream.

Hi everyone, this is my first post here on the website. I have tried lucid dreaming in the past, just never found the strength/motivation to keep working on it. But now, a few years later from when I first tried, I'm determined to make this work, no matter how long it takes.

!!Just a heads up, English isn't my native language, so I apologize in advance for any grammar mistakes you see here.!!

So, I remember having two dreams today, one around 2:00 - 3:00 AM when I naturally woke up to drink some water, and the second one in the morning hours. Thing is, I did some dream delving right after having each of them, and had a near perfect recall of both, but ended up forgetting most of it. I forgot most of the first one because I moved involuntarily on my bed for feeling uncomfortable, and then the second one because of a loud noise in my house. So yeah, off to a stellar start .

But anyway, to actually talk about the dreams now.

1. Am I in Hellskitchen or Something?
From what I remember, this one had something to do with cooking, because I feel like I was in some kind of kitchen, and there was a bunch of other people with me. There was someone shouting, either at me, someone else, or all of us at the same time. It sounded like this person was mad, pointing out something we did wrong while cooking or maybe a dish that turned out not very good, Gordon Ramsay style.



2. Messing Up Passwords... In Space
The second one is even hazier than the first one. I have the faintest memory of this one taking place in space, inside some sort of spacecraft, but I could be wrong. What I do remember most, is that I was trying to input a password into a terminal, but failing it multiple times. I think this one was partly inspired by me watching some Markplier In Space the night before.


And yeah, that's about it. It bothers me a lot, having almost all of it in my head, just to lose most of it shortly after. But I'm sure this is where most people start from, so I can't be too mad. But like I said, I'm willing to make things work this time, so it doesn't matter how long it takes. And I'll make sure to share any future amazing experiences I have with you guys, as well as reading about yours .
Until next time!

Not many dreams. Jamie drive by again? I was pulling into the Reddi-mart to pull out some cash. Noticed the one car with the wannabe red but not quite color. Stared intently inside... I saw a woman with brown hair, sort of like Jamie but unsure. She seemed to notice I was looking her way and she defiantly turned her gaze to the side (but was probably just shoulder checking for oncoming traffic before turning.). moments later while inside... her voice started up. "Why did I do that? I'm sorry." Her voice was apologizing non stop throughout the day. Her crime - Doing the freezout thing. I mean I'll try my best to let it slide. Even though her voice promised me that she would not do that anymore. I'll admit when I worked with her - it was an extremely frustrating thing to deal with. I have never liked it, don't currently like it, and never will. Experiencing that currently kind of doesn't help. Remember - I'm absolutely certain I have at least mild traits of BPD myself. The worst thing for me emotionally is to consistently re live past trauma. It's bad enough that I currently live with my dad, even though he is getting old and feeble - He still is emotionally abusive. Constantly scoffing in disappointment over every single thing I do. Also Boomer parents, "Why don't my kids wanna see me.?" I'm absolutely positive Jamie reads these, so please take these things into consideration. I have stated a lot on this journal, that I am trying my best to work on my issues around her, so that I can be a safe place for her. It should go both ways. I'm dedicated to being sensitive and accommodating to her issues, and working it out with her with good communication. I however, expect the exact same thing from her. Because if me mentioning in a dream how long it's been since we've talked and how salty I am about it is going to trigger her badly into a splitting episode, What does she think ignoring me in outright defiance does to me? It's a fine line - walking on eggshells. And I do pray everyday that Jesus somehow solves her BPD issues. There's a guy on Tik tik sensitive.stability - a self proclaimed self cured BPD guy that has a program for trying to be symptom free. It probably costs money, but it might be worth it for us to check it out. It's loosely based on DBT. Another thing is that her voice keeps asking for prayers, when we both gt upset at this stuff. That's really good. Wether the prayers are getting answered or not, it's a good thing that seems to help us stay grounded with one another.


On a lighter note. If Jamie wants to talk to me I imagine we are going to have some pretty awkward initial conversations. Somehow I don't think,"Hey there Captain Booty cheeks, are you ready to make that daughter we've been dreaming about? Or are you chicken?" is going to work well.

Dreams:

first night: Nothing, except a flash of Jamie coming up to me and hugging me.

Night after her apparent) run in.


Wal-Mart

I was in a Wal-Mart with some native girl who wanted to be my girlfriend. I saw a Woman I recognized as Shannon M from didsbury (Nice trailer park lady who worked at Hi-Ho for years. Has a couple kids - one borderline daughter with a kid) I'm like "Hey!" And the woman (Possibly Jamie.) started hugging me from behind really tightly and kissing the back of my neck in the same spot over and over again. I was walking as she did this. The Native girl was staring at me funny. I said, "I know this lady I worked with her at Wal-Mart for 5 months or so." (In reality I never worked with shannon but the line implies I was recognizing Jamie). The dream seems to end there.

The voice was still insistent that the van I saw Monday was Jamie. Even though I seen a similar grey van at the same store driven by an older brown haired lady. The voice argued that there's lots of grand caravans in the area. This is true. Her voice complained later, " How come you pretend I'm not there when I visit?" Well... Driving by someone goes quick. Sometimes her sightings don't leave me room to visibly react. One apperrent drive by was at night and I could barely make out the shape of a face. And I couldn't literally see inside the van well because of the lighting. Depending on light reflecting off a windshield can determine how much you see inside someone's vehicle.

Uncle again

I was almost lucid. I spoke like I knew it was a dream. I saw my uncle lying on a cot with some woman. I asked if his name was his name. He said yes. I told him not to come into my dreams anymore. I don't remember much after.

One night I woke up at 2 am and Jamie's voice kept asking for prayers because of a nightmare. Was she watching "From?" - It gave her nightmares. I have heard that Borderlines can have excruciatingly long and vivid frequent nightmares.

Raven

A brief dream where I saw Raven. Can't remember details tho.

Jamie 1

Brief flash of her holding me in bed.

Possibly Jamie?

Started off, I was in a shopping mall. I was in a Zellers or Sears like store. Some women in medical clothing were testing someone. It turns out they had a contagious disease. They said they had to quarantine the area and since I was a few times away that meant me. They put some weird medical gown on me.. more like a vest. Then they brought me a Hazmat suit. This was interrupted by a horde of people running through the store in a panic. The medical people ran away too. I tore off the vest and looked two the double doors leading outside. Another horde of people were running outside as well.

I took off and went down a hallway. Went through a door onto a street. No one was running so 8 figured I was past the danger. I felt I was near Jamie's place so I went up these garden paths separated by plastic bubbles with zip up doors. I was on a hill looking down at at garden being tended by an older lady with brown hair. I knew who she was. I had seen that lady lots in dreams at Jamie's house. Not sure if she's a guide or guardian.

I went through the next zipper door, and I was quite confused as to where I was. Inside was a living room. A woman that looked like Jamie was sleeping on a couch. I woke her up and asked how to leave? She got up and said she would help. Her hair went from long to shorter with the ends by her chin. She said, "Make sure you give me a hug and a kiss before you leave. " I thought since she no longer looked like Jamie, that she was someone else... That it might be cheating. I gathered some things that I had left there including a gun. Jamie didn't seem bothered by that. I tucked it into a side pocket or purse. She looked like Jamie again and I was waiting for my hug. Jamie went into a kitchen then and she looked like someone else. An older man was suddenly with her. They were talking. I figured it was the woman's husband. She no longer seemed aware that I was there so I left.

Year three of the necessary and restorative retreat up in the Topanga hills of California with several of my closest friends. On Sunday, Meow Meow, whom I had just met for the first time at this retreat, noticed a book I was reading "Man and his Symbols," a work with an introduction by Carl Jung, and the subject matter of which (dreams, archetypes, etc.) became the grounds for a brief conversation between us. She showed me the Jungian tattoo on her back, to which I took great interest. That night, I dreamt that all of us were sitting together outside during sunrise, and a pillow of fog began to envelope us on all sides. It was very similar to how the fog in the Lost Woods of the Breath of The Wild game would engulf Link if he strayed too far off the path. I also dreamt that after the fog started surrounding us, I began cuddling and making out with Lynn, one of the other friends who was with us on the retreat. The night before, we had all took MDMA and were snuggled up together very close, and I felt a profound attraction to her. But no kissing took place. Anyway, here's where it gets important. The morning after that dream, I began explaining the dream to my friend Shot, who immediately adopted a look of shock on his face. I explained it more to Meow Meow and Kai, who both explained that this exact thing happened to them this morning, as they had all stayed up till sunrise, long after I had gone to bed. They told me how the morning fog surrounded them as they were all sitting together, and they noted how much I would have loved this. They even considered going to wake me several times, but never did. Lynn had left the house before I woke up and I did not get a chance to say goodbye, but she texted me saying that my spirit was with them that morning. Clearly, it was. This synchronistic occurrence will live with me forever. I am still sort of in shock. I have a renewed love of dreams and synchronicity. I hope to keep up dream journaling more regularly now.

Really tired, I'll try to journal everything as best as I can.

Outside the Reddi-Mart yesterday around 5 pm spotted a Grey Dodge caravan, later model. Because of the light I couldn't exactly see inside. A brown haired woman sitting there and possibly smiling at me? Unsure as I couldn't see. As I walked away. The Jamie voice suggested that it may have been her. Since I didn't see clearly, I'm not putting too much faith in it. Maybe try waving next time???

Dreams:

Jamie 1

Just a dream of me and her in bed kissing.

Jamie 2

I was at a bar with my brother. It was karaoke or something. I was at a table with some paper writing down songs. Jamie came by me as I left the table, and nervously muttered something, which I couldn't quite make out. But, it seemed directed at me.
I walked away and said, "Yeah!!! What SHE said!!". I went outside for a smoke.

Jamie 3

I was with Jamie and her friends somewhere. Jamie was singing something. She noticed me and changed the lyrics to include my name. I said I have some songs I can sing about her. But she didn't seem to hear that and took off with her friends. I was a little disappointed.

Lucid?

I became lucid randomly in a house. I remembered wanting to find Jamie. I went outside to walk to her dream area but my memory fades

From

(I was watching the paramount+ show "From." Before bed.)

I was in the setting of the show. I was in some barn at night with the brother and sister from the show. I was holding a talisman against the door because I couldn't hang it up for some reason...

What?

I went to visit my distant uncle. I thought he could help me with some. He was sitting in a large chair surrounded by people. He gave me a long speech about how I bought myself a coffee and someone else. He seemed to be guilt tripping me about spending money irresponsibly. He then nodded to someone and indicated that they could give me a heart attack in a dream or something... I left dumbstruck. Give someone a heart attack over buying coffee?

Drywall

I was on a drywall Job with the same uncle. I was leaving the job. I wanted nothing to do with him. He seemed to be apologizing, but I wasn't having it.

Jamie is still hard to find in dreams. Things keep interfering.

Jamie 1

Long dream. But all I remember is taking a bus. I was going to the transfer station to catch a connecting bus. Suddenly instead of a bus, I was in a car... And my mother was driving. She drove right past the bus stop where I was supposed to catch the other bus. I told her to let me off but she wouldn't. I asked again. Still wouldn't let me off. My mother is a recovering schizophrenic so I thought maybe she was off her meds. I started yelling and insisting that she let me off. We were in a school zone now and we were slowing down for children. I started yelling that she stopped her meds. The car stopped. Instead of my mother it was Jamie driving. She looked at me really upset.


Really annoying I keep seeing Jamie as someone else...

Jamie 2

3rd person. I saw Jamie lying in bed. Some spider like creature was on her ceiling.

Woke up and made a comment about it to the voice. Her voice said, " How do you know what I dream about?" I answered that I dreamed it.

Jamie 3

We were in a stadium at some game. We were making out.

Annoying

I was at a house with some people. Someone kept trying to get me to drink beer. I didn't want any. The guy kept insisting, and I kept refusing until I was yelling. That dream shaman guy started yelling at me too.

What

A flash of a dream where Jamie was at an orgy. I saw some stuff....

Maybe that dream shaman guy interfering again?

Wtf

A dream where Jamie was dressing up in some lingerie. But she looked like a man. She was also in a garage talking to someone, asking if I might like the outfit.

Last night

Um

I was with some dark guy in a city. He was showing me to some secret hiding place. We had to walk down a long sidewalk to get the. It was this warehouse place under a bridge.

Once there he pulled down his pants and started pole dancing. 8 was like, " yo look buddy, I think you have the wrong idea about me." And he was like: I guess I read the situation wrong. And I'm like, "I don't know what I did to make you think... How do I get out of here?"

He pointed down a ways and I left.

What's with all the Gay themed dreams? I want my Jamie back dammit.

Semi lucid

I was in an abandoned house. became vaguely lucid. I was watching a bed. I tried to manifest Jamie in it. A shape appeared under the covers. I pulled them off but no one was there. Memory fades after.

Kind of frustrating. Voice at night and mornings is great. She keeps saying it's the best relationship she's ever been in and she doesn't see me in person. I hope that changes someday. It is for me to.

My dream began in a house in what seemed to be a classic American suburb. I was getting a haircut by a barber that my brother recommended to me. It was the type of "underground" barber that would cut your hair for cheap and only take cash. I entered the garage and saw a guy with a girl standing next to him; they were both of Korean descent.

I took my seat and looked at the TV-screen in front of me. The barber was putting up "funny images" on the screen and was just having fun, fucking about (I do not remember what the images were but they were not funny to me).
After a while, the guy slowly started cutting my hair, and halfway through I realised it looked like shit. I had faith that the barber knew what he was doing so I didn't say or do anything. But when he was done, I was almost completely bald on the backside of my head with uneven lumps of hair sticking out. My hair was a complete mess and I was legitimately considering buying a wig.

While contemplating what to do, I looked to the left to see my friend James standing under the garage door. When he saw me, he broke out laughing. At this point I was furious and I chased after him because I wanted to beat him up. Although I tried, I could not catch up to James and gave up chasing him fairly quickly.

I was still fuming with rage to the point where I couldn't contain myself. I felt the primal urge to destroy someone, but no one was around. So in an attempt to attract people to me, I screamed "N*GGER" as loud as I could, in hopes that some angry bystander would approach me. As luck would have it, three guys approached me in anger. Without the slightest hint of hesitation, I immediately attacked the guy standing in the middle. I was simply enraged, beyond rhyme or reason, my main goal was to inflict as much pain as possible. The others attacked me as well as I went back and forth between the three of them, exchanging hits. Even though I took a lot of brutal hits, I was so outraged and doped up on adrenalin that I felt no pain. I just kept on fighting them, not caring for their well being, until I completely lost myself in a moment of euphoria.
Then I woke up.

Please comment your thoughts!

I had a dream where I was being held captive under a contract by a very large and powerful company. The contract specified that I was forced to play chess against a very powerful opponent, until I beat him. I'm around 500 elo and the opponent was roughly around GM level. This took place in a large nature/grass area, with a nearby stream, that I know from real life. The chess games were played on a computer and were streamed live and with millions of people watching, and there were what seemed to be roughly a million people standing around me as well, spectating.

As the days blended together, I kept losing time and time again. I had access to the stream chat, and I sometimes typed in there, but nobody in chat noticed it was me. I was world famous, but I was essentially a slave to the company as I couldn't leave. One night, I tried to escape at dark, but the security, consisting of around 20 people, ended up catching me, bringing me back and forcing me to continue playing chess for my freedom.

Days passed and i slowly went mad with rage. It started out with me slapping papers in random peoples faces as i tried to vent my anger onto others. It eventually got to the point where I would target my aggression on the guy managing the whole chess event; I spat on him and threw water in his face.
My mental state declined exponentially. I became more ruthless and violent. At some point I gouged some guys eyes out from rage, but nobody could do anything to me as I was under the protection of the company since I was making them tons of money. Essentially everyone around me became the victim of my anger driven torture schemes.

On a early autumn morning at around 5 AM: I beat him. I was barely paying attention, but I saw the checkmate pop-up on my screen as my heart rate increased rapidly. I checked the stream views and they went from around 16 million to 600 million+ viewers. I earned my freedom.
But I felt that I had to handle the situation properly. As I was a big asset to the company, I knew they wouldn't let go of me, so I went to ask the manager to see my contract without letting him know I won (I for some reason didn't think any staff was watching since it was early in the morning). I asked to see the contract so I could check for loopholes and have a raw copy in case they tried changing the contract in an attempt to prevent my freedom.
As I asked for the contract, the manager ignored me and by then I knew it was too late. They must have already done something to the contract and I knew I was never gonna be freed. I cracked.

I took out a knife and stabbed the managers stomach, cutting him open like I was gutting freshly caught prey. He was still alive and screaming in pain, I cut off his ears and eventually his genitalia. At this point around ten people were desperately trying to pull me off of him, and as they tried to subdue me I ended up slashing some guys eye with the knife.
I had become fully insane, with my only goal being to hurt as many people as possible. Nothing mattered more to me as I became a fucking torture machine, desperately trying to cause harm people.
Then i woke up.

Please comment your thoughts!

Virtually no dreams for two nights.

Last night:

Jamie 1

A dream Jamie was in picture butte, the town I was living in for a couple years until mid summer of last year. She was checking out the town.

That town has a really good Dutch bakery.
I had a Jamie look a like sighting in that town. I was getting coffee one morning at a gas station. Someone with her look was standing by a sink. Kind of stared at me and smiled. I just ignored it. Outside was a white SUV tho. Looked nice and expensive like a range Rover.


Jamie 2


A dream I found a note from Jamie. It said something about how she keeps running into really attractive people but she is deciding to stay the course with me.

Yeah, I get little crushes here and there too. I'm not an aggressive guy at all so nothing comes of it. I just get bored and it goes away. The few times I've tried to be aggressive, I get so emotionally unstable to the point where I can't sleep.

I hardly ever respond to flirting anyway. I've dealt with so many false flirting from people getting a kick out of shutting me down. Most people aren't worth responding to at all.

I'm so dense anyway. When I was younger in high school. Some girl who already had a boyfriend. Invited me to help her babysit. After the kids went to sleep she cuddled up to me. I thought, "this is nice." And just enjoyed it. After a minute she said I was weird and slept somewhere else... I didn't clue in until years later. The few women I have been physical with had to literally tell me," Okay, you can kiss me now... Put your hand here."

I often wonder if Jamie was trying to prompt me to make a move on her. I'm just dense and didn't pick it up. Can't expect a guy who never was a player to know all the player moves. Her voice sometimes asks why was I ignoring her at certain times. Well I wasn't. If she wasn't talking to me I didn't talk to her. And if I did try to talk her, she would get mad and shut me down. Once in response to her voice asking this I responded, " well, think back. At what times did we have good conversations and things went well, what was the most consistent thing?" And she answered, " When I talked to you."

Woah, why am I ranting?

Annoying

A dream that dream shaman guy that use to live here was visiting me.

I wish the guy would get a clue and stay out.

Hug

I dreamed of seeing Charlotte, my cousin's daughter outside a house. She seemed quiet until I offered her a hug, as an apology for not being able to visit. She readily accepted the hug.

The Attack
I was on a jobsite when I heard my mom yelling.
"Either you're going to give us second floor or we're going to take it!"
Her demand was met by a silent pause.
"Attack!" She demanded.
I reached into my tool box for some weapons and found two hammers. One was metal and the other was rubber. I stormed into the building looking for enemies to hit when I found no one. I started looking around and saw a women who looked like a librarian behind a counter picking up an AK-47 and decided I shouldn't mess with her.

*I had another dream that I didn't wright down and forgot.

*Dream signs*
Adventure
Family members in strange locations.
Battle

The Wtich
I was with a group of two other people, we were a typical mmo group and I was the healer. I can't remember what they were but I think one was dps and the other was a tank.
One of them was talking to us like she was trying to teach us, the first thing I remember was her asking.
"If it comes down to it are you going to kick curbs?"
She was referring to me using attack spells on enemies I can't beat.
"I'll kick curbs any day!" I responded
"You never kick curbs." She said scoldingly.
Soon after that we were attacked by a flying witch, she wore red and flew on a magic broom.
After many attacks from my party it wasn't enough, I couldn't heal them enough and we couldn't deal enough damage.
The two of them died and I ran away to the tree's, I was now in my childhood backyard(we lived in 3 acres of the woods) Now hiding under a tree I heard something above me. It was another witch, this one was levitating on a broom stick as well, she had an owl on her shoulder and was dressed in brown colors. After talking to her for a bit I determined that she didn't want to kill me.
"Don't attack the priests back!" She yelled out.
I prepared my attack spell and was about to attack the owl witch when, thinking she was trying to trick me, when suddenly the red witch appeared but she was going straight to the owl witch and started attacking her. As the owl witch fled the red witch followed, I tried casting my attack spells but I couldn't time the attack right as they were quickly flying away.
Not sure what to do now I wondered to the burn pit and found a metal trashcan lid.
"Maybe I can use it to protect myself." I picked it up.
Under it was a grass hopper and many ants. The ants were walking towards the grass hopper but as soon as they got close the grass hopper did a a small hop in the air to let the ants walk under it. More grass hoppers started popping into existence and did the same little hop when the ants came too close.
I hear a casual whistle above me and looked up to see the owl witch chilling in the sky. I assumed she managed to kill the red witch. "Probably because my party already damage her", I thought.

*Dream signs to look for,
1: Adventuring with a small group of people
2: Casting spells
3: Flying witches
4: Things appearing out of thin air.
5: Battle

A few fragments from the previous nights. Was talking to the Jamie voice in the middle of the night. Many in the Twin Flame community report hearing their partner's voice in their head. As well as experiencing their presence while going to bed. For me it's like experiencing physical sensations with a phantom body (hugs, kisses etc.). I think her voice wanted confirmation of this. Specifically we both mentioned that we both felt safe during this nightly experience. Also I fall into HH or micro dreams which usually reflect the experience.

Jamie 1

A dream where Jamie was in her house. My vision zoomed out and her house was in a toy box or something.

Jamie 2

We seemed to be getting married in this dream. Jamie confirmed her vows and then it was my turn. I began stumbling my vows and finding it hard to speak. Someone started yelling at me for this.

Jamie 3

Brief sex related dream.

Last night:

Jamie 4

HH during talking to her voice. I was seeing a hallway in n a hospital filled with equipment. I heard Jamie's voice say, "I love it when you kiss me down the hall."

I woke up and asked her voice what she meant. Her voice said, " it was my dream, it made sense at the time."

Jamie 5

Jamie was in a rage or something. Not sure what about. I grabbed her in a hug to calm her down. She struggled and maybe swore at me, but I held on. She stopped and I just let her cry.

I woke up and her voice said, " Thank you for calming me down."

Annoying.

I was working in a strange place as a chef. I was in a bathroom and saw something gross in a toilet... Whoever had left it there, was dying from colon cancer. There was blood all over the floor.
I left and passed by a door leading to a room where someone older men were sitting. One man was dying and bleeding... Maybe the cancer guy.

Went to the kitchen. But didn't know what to make. An older east Indian woman was trying to get with me while I was working. Kept force hugging me after I told her to stop.

Went back to the room with the men saying I was going to quit because of that woman. I came there for work and nothing else.

I dream of the [X] library again. I've dreamt of it before, I'm sure, and it was like trying to recall my other dream - I struggled to remember where everything was.

I slip out of my house from a back door (white, frosted glass pane) into a narrow cobbled alley, and head towards the library. Soon enough I'm there. Entering the large double doors of the library I see a huge neon red sign, below which is surely a bar - tables clustered together, people clustered around them, moving, a long bar at the back wall, and everything is dark in there, as if it's midnight already, although the sky is bright outside.

I turn and head down some corridors towards the library. They are all white linoleum, white walls, windowless, winding - but somehow I find my way. At the end of a corridor are two curved white doors, leading off in different directions, where I know the library should be. They have circular porthole windows at the top. I push each one open, look inside, rush around searching, but all I find is more white rooms and offices. They are all empty and so quiet - it feels like I shouldn't be here.

Finally, whoever knows how, I find the library. I peek through the round windows in the door and see, set against purple carpet and dark green walls, shelves and shelves of books throughout a moderately large rectangular room. Children and (a few) teenagers mill around and stand and sit reading. I realise that this is the children's library and I need to find the larger one, and I turn back to search once more.

When I reach the large library, it is almost outside, a large glass wall facing onto a paved courtyard, accessed from a semi-covered walkway. I can see, through the full-length windows to the courtyard, the huge room filled with books and a few people walking around. But there is no door in sight. I proceed along the walkway, following the library wall, looking for ways in - I find none. When I at last come across a door, quite a ways along, I peer through its window and see just another corridor; narrow, curving, dark, empty, dimly lit with yellow lights here and there. It gives me an eerie feeling.

I retrace my steps to the courtyard and wonder how this can be. A woman in uniform (looking like an employee) marches briskly towards where I am, turns sharply to face the library wall, and shouts out an admonishment to the people inside while raising and bringing down her arm, just once, in a forceful slicing motion. The courtyard window seems to pop out of the walls a few feet, revealing hidden side walls which are also full-length glass - and then, as I watch from the side, the whole library slides forward out of the concrete at a dizzying speed, while shouts and protests come from inside - I see people leap up from their desks and gesticulate angrily towards the now departing woman. The library comes to a stop with a glass door now in front of me. I enter.

This is a library I used to visit often as a child. Not anymore, however - when I was 11 I lost a book and was too ashamed to go own up and pay the fine, so I never went back. The guilt has never gone away...

Jamie seems missing, some nights.

Haunted

I was with 2 blond women (Asuka and Jamie?). We were dared to spend the night at a haunted house. I went in a room by myself, but the haunted vibes were so strong, I felt dizzy. Decided to leave and left. Can't remember what I did. Maybe some errands and went back. The women were still there.

Jamie

I was walking along a dirt road. A horse and driver pulling a wooden trailer passed by. The trailer was filled with random stuff. Jamie was sitting in the trailer. She opened her legs and flashed me her lower goods. "U want this?" She asked grinning.

Yeah sure, she knows where I live. Come snag me one evening nd let's get it over with already.

What?

I'm in bed, but I'm in a glass lab. Doctors or scientists are studying me sleep for some reason? And Jamie is with them.

High

I'm with my brother at some bar or social event. In this dream were in Edmonton. There was 2 big malls or something. I remember going between them a few times and roaming. But we wound up at some restaurant or something. But it was also a friend's house? Some blond lady offered us a drink with psychedelic drugs in it or something. I was like no. She handed me. Glass with one sip in it. It looked orange. She said it was a microdose. I took it without thinking.

I walked outside and was near a park with a hill. A purple bear was climbing a hill. At the top of the hill was a garbage can. A giant tentacle with spikes on it came from the top of the garbage can and grabbed the bear and somehow at it. I turned around end every thing had psychedelic hues. Very colorful people and creatures were walking around that were phasing in and out of existence.

I walked back to where my brother was and told him I am going to go find a place to pass out. I said I keep seeing people that aren't there.

I wonder if the woman was Jamie? She was into psychedelics when we were friends. I would like to re iterate that I will never touch hard drugs or psychedelics ever again. I'm pretty sure I had an unbearable panic disorder because of them. Even weed gives me panic. The odd beer use to relax me, now it gives me chest pains the next day. Last time was so bad I checked myself into emergency.

Jamie 2

I'm not in the dream. I see Jamie by herself in a restaurant or bar. She's closing the store. She finishes and finds some stairs and goes up them and goes through a door. She walks in. My vision zooms out and now she's in her farm house at the top. Is this how she teleports in dreams.

I miss the dreams where we were together a lot. And holding hands.