Recent DJ Posts

The dream began in a European capital city, it was in the middle of the night.
I was hanging out with James and Vagabond and we were just walking around the city, talking to eachother.
The city encompassed us with tall buildings. At the time, we were walking on a road that was going in between two very tall buildings, and as we got to the end of the building and turned the corner, the scenery completely changed.
Following the road beyond the buildings lead us to a huge frozen lake, surrounded by a mountain range; the scenery was very Norwegian.
We walked on the ice until we got to the edge between the ice and water. For some reason, the three of us decided to jump in. On top of that I decided to put my phone on a small sheet of ice to prevent it from getting wet, but as we started swimming, the waves went on the sheet of ice and covered my phone in water. I quickly grabbed it and pulled it out of the water, I think it still worked.

Later on we went to a houseparty. We were sitting around a circular table, that was halfway in a sort of cubby. The sitting area in the cubby is a sort of bench with cushions, while the rest of the table is surrounded by chairs. I was sitting on the cushions with a guy next to me sniffing what I believed to be cocaine.
He was very outgoing and social, and he offered me some but I refused. He insisted and put a teent on the the tip of a knife up to my nose, but I blew air out of my nose to make sure I didn't ingest any of the cocaine. It was quite awkward and people were staring, but I was steadfast in my decision and wasn't embarrased about it.
I then went to another room and found a talking cat, laying on a couch. The cat was black with a white underbelly, with big and unrealistic eyes, like it was a cartoon cat. It was extremely cute.
I quickly realised the cat was a physical manifestation of my subconcious mind, and I was very excited to talk to the cat.
**I was aware that the subconcious mind stores a bunch of information that your concious mind can't necessarily access. I believed that the concious and subconcious minds are like two different minds that could indepedently think. I perceived the cat as a sort of spokesperson for my subconcious mind, so I really wanted to talk to it.**
I asked the cat if it had a conciousness outside of "my conciousness" and it replied with "Yes".
As I spoke to the cat, I would frequently hug it as it was very precious to me. I was very affectionate. It didn't mind me hugging it at all, but it didn't play into it either. It just remained sort of serious.
I also asked why it was hiding information from my concious mind. **Ironically I don't remember the answer**
On top of that I would ask very casual questions like how it was doing, if it was happy, how it perceived the world. I don't remember any particularly negative responses from it but I don't remember any concrete answers either.
The cat was relaxed and seemed generally happy, but I could tell it took it's job as "my subconcious" very serious.

After I finished talking to the cat, I was completely alone. Everyone was gone, including the cat.
The lights inside the house were also turned off, the atmosphere was very ominous. For some reason I knew the house had become haunted.
I was a bit scared but not much.
I walked into the kitchen and continued walking around randomly.
Then I woke up.


**Ok so I'm not a psychologist or dream expert, so I can't be sure of this. But you know how dreaming is a way to connect with your subconcious mind?
Maybe my subconcious mind decided it would allow me to directly talk to it in the dream through the cat. Or maybe it's just something my mind made up and I didn't actually talk to my subconcious mind.
I'm not sure, but it would be cool if it was the former rather than the latter.**

Please comment your thoughts!

Jamie seems missing, some nights.

Haunted

I was with 2 blond women (Asuka and Jamie?). We were dared to spend the night at a haunted house. I went in a room by myself, but the haunted vibes were so strong, I felt dizzy. Decided to leave and left. Can't remember what I did. Maybe some errands and went back. The women were still there.

Jamie

I was walking along a dirt road. A horse and driver pulling a wooden trailer passed by. The trailer was filled with random stuff. Jamie was sitting in the trailer. She opened her legs and flashed me her lower goods. "U want this?" She asked grinning.

Yeah sure, she knows where I live. Come snag me one evening nd let's get it over with already.

What?

I'm in bed, but I'm in a glass lab. Doctors or scientists are studying me sleep for some reason? And Jamie is with them.

High

I'm with my brother at some bar or social event. In this dream were in Edmonton. There was 2 big malls or something. I remember going between them a few times and roaming. But we wound up at some restaurant or something. But it was also a friend's house? Some blond lady offered us a drink with psychedelic drugs in it or something. I was like no. She handed me. Glass with one sip in it. It looked orange. She said it was a microdose. I took it without thinking.

I walked outside and was near a park with a hill. A purple bear was climbing a hill. At the top of the hill was a garbage can. A giant tentacle with spikes on it came from the top of the garbage can and grabbed the bear and somehow at it. I turned around end every thing had psychedelic hues. Very colorful people and creatures were walking around that were phasing in and out of existence.

I walked back to where my brother was and told him I am going to go find a place to pass out. I said I keep seeing people that aren't there.

I wonder if the woman was Jamie? She was into psychedelics when we were friends. I would like to re iterate that I will never touch hard drugs or psychedelics ever again. I'm pretty sure I had an unbearable panic disorder because of them. Even weed gives me panic. The odd beer use to relax me, now it gives me chest pains the next day. Last time was so bad I checked myself into emergency.

Jamie 2

I'm not in the dream. I see Jamie by herself in a restaurant or bar. She's closing the store. She finishes and finds some stairs and goes up them and goes through a door. She walks in. My vision zooms out and now she's in her farm house at the top. Is this how she teleports in dreams.

I miss the dreams where we were together a lot. And holding hands.

Posting a day earlier than usual due to the subject matter. (this is especially for Jamie if she reads these.)

Drugs

I'm at some woman's house. A woman is sitting in front of a coffee table. (Not sure if this was Jamie since she looked older.) On the table is a giant line of white powder. The woman is explaining to me that this is enough drugs to kill someone. She takes a razor and cuts a small section away and says this is safe. She was explaining it was a new psychedelic or something. The dream fades

what?

I'm in chilliwack or something... I'm with a woman that is supposed to be my future wife. We get into cars shaped like hearses... (that's not ominous at all..) The woman is older but when she smiles at me I recognize Jamie. We are holding one another.

I wake up... I get a weird voice that sounds like Jesus say, "I will take care of you after Jamie commits suicide." I'm like: what? I check in with her voice all day and she seems normal and fine.

next night:

Theater

A dream unrelated to Jamie. I was with a group of people and we went into a strange theater.

There was another small flash of Jamie but can't remember the subject matter.

I wake up and that same voice startles me again this morning with, "She's days away from passing away.". I spend some time in prayer asking Jesus if this is really him saying this? Is there anything I can do? Is this real, or am I losing my mind? The guy is just quiet on this. After some time I gt a sense to just put it in my dream journal and maybe he said.

now I'm not sure how to take these impressions. Especially since Jesus revealed to me in a big way, some months ago, a different future in mind for me and Jamie. Why would he suddenly contradict that? Or is it really him saying this? If it is a warning, maybe the drug dream is related. When Me and Jamie were friends I know she was into reckless drug use - her sometimes defending it as being harmless, like nothing bad is going to happen to her. But then again she was reckless after moving during an episode. Regarding that: I don't even touch any drug anymore or alcohol. I don't mind people smoking weed, but anything experimental or dangerous is not, nor will ever be, a part of my life.

I already lost a borderline Cousin to drugs. The one that died a few years ago. I remember at a time she was doing well, volunteering for police, doing all the necessary things so she could see her kids. Then she fell for the wrong guy, and went downhill over the next few years. This is why I also pray against counterfeit lovers that me or Jamie might encounter.

But seriously, allow me to list some of the people in my age group that I've lost to drug related stuff. My friend in chilliwack i went to high school with, his sister. A drummer me and my brother use to play with. Mine and my brother's other friend Brian, who's pregnant girlfriend found him hanging in a closet. My old neighbor in lethbridge, who got with the wrong woman, (She had a history of seducing men and using that to get them addicted to drugs. I still can't believe that people like that actually exist, but alas, I've seen the results).

So real or not, I feel i must leave a warning about this. I don't know if Jamie currently does any kind of drugs or anything as it's some years later. Borderlines do have a high statistics in suicide rate. I believe she's past that average age where attempts happen so at least pat herself on the back for making it past that. I've personally seen her grandiose side, that feels like nothing bad can happen to her. It obviously can. I'm posting this because It's real or I'm crazy - but it's out of concern. I, for one, remember that when when there wasn't a bunch of BS power struggles, that me and her got along better than anybody - and iot would be nice to have that again. We deserve a better ending than what happened.

Jesus said in prayer for jamie just to go to him with your concerns, he's always there.

delete

I had one of the longer dreams that left me with impressions when I woke up.

I'm at a college and walking around with two girls in my age. A man a bit older than us guides us and starts to chew some kind of thing. He tells us that he is a test person and that the thing he chewed can have a side effect of making his vision go bad and asks us if we want some. One of the girls says that it is undercover drugs and the girls do not want any. The man says yes and laughs. I take one and when we walk over a big height my vision goes bad so that I can't see that it is a big fall. It looks as though it is only 1 meter down but before it was maybe 10 meters. I understand that it is the drugs and that it is understandable that many people die of jumping of heigh places when they are affected by drugs.

I'm outside with some schoolmates and a teacher. I run away with two girls. Both are supposed to be my age but one of them looks just like my physics teacher that looks like she's 70 years old. There comes a car with a teacher in it and we hide by a corner. The teacher could have seen us if he looked closely.

I'm walking town with Claus and dad. Earlier in the dream there was some kind of time traveling and the prime minister changed place. I asked Claus and dad about this but I became very bad with words so I could not say what I meant. I do my RC and tells them that this probably is a dream. The RC doesn't work so I keep on walking with them.

I'm in my brother's bed and we are changing clothes. I pick up some socks but they all have holes in them. When I leave the bed some other kids about 11 years old take the bed.

It's some kind of computer game but I'm in a school. I run around and I'm apparently late to school. I am able to choose which school I want to go to and I choose the one with a girl I met earlier in the dream. She makes some kind of joke and I laugh at it and makes a joke too. I don't really understand them but she seems to like them so I laugh too. There are two more people in our company and they also join us. There is a big school disco and everyone starts to dance. New fragment. We're inside and sitting on a sofa. There comes a guitar and a girl says that she wants to show us her new song that is called "My Song". She starts to sing but it ends very quickly. I want to take the guitar but it is transformed to an acoustic bass instead. I say something about it impressed but no one seems to notice.

I'm in a different country and there are some news about a man that has sewn snakes for some mad purpose. I watch some videos where he uses a sewing kit and sew a living snake. He uses some other tools and brutalizes it until it's not much left of it. He cuts a part from it in order to eat later. I am disgusted and think about how there are crazy people in the world. He takes a big crocodile about 3 meters long and cuts a piece of the middle. He walks out with the crocodile and holds its distance with a long plastic stick. The crocodile screams in pain and tries to kill itself by banging its head against a wall. The crocodile enters someone's house and a big lion attacks the crocodile. They fight for a while but the lion wins. I'm now in my own body and the woman in the house thanks us for something. I walk back to home but we are on an island. My family sits around a round table outside and they ask me if I can grab something to drink from the fridge. They also say something about the woman from before. I walk inside and it looks nothing like our home. I open the fridge and find some good looking drinks. I grab one and walk out.

Notes: I didn't excpect to remember this much. The school theme was prominent in the dreams. There were also three girls that intrested me in them.

Semi-lucidity! Trying shapeshifting.
In the beginning there was some sort of scary things, it was like a catalog of drugs that make your dreams insane with illustrations of what you could see, most notably a drug that is some sort of mineral which looks like some really demonic face with a mouth stretched down for meters, an unhealthy reddish skin and dead white eyes, and it made you see faces like that in your dream. Then it was somewhat about Subnautica. But then I was at home and suddenly I had a small amount of heightened awareness that it might be a dream. Then there was a sort of puppet but it was alive and I brought it into a room and closed the door to protect us from something. We went outside again and there were intimidating people and it was also like I read something bad about them. They said something I don't remember. I went past them and at the window were also some intimidating people I couldn't get past. I went back to the room.

I don't remember the part right before it, but I knew I was dreaming and did multiple reality checks and they all told me I was in a dream, so, now aware, I thought of something to do. The dream was very unclear and I totally forgot about stabilizing, but didn't even notice, so this was at most semi-lucid. I went to a mirror and tried transforming into a dragon. I didn't manage to do it at all since I hadn't at all had a visualization of the dragon I'd want to transform in. I tried doing it by looking to the mirror and back once I had an idea of what I wanted. As it didn't work after multiple attempts I just tried a tail at first, and that worked... somewhat. I didn't really take the right idea at all from the beginning anyway. The tail was there, but it was numb and had no feeling. And it was green, and I wanted it blue, so I just looked away and back again, and there it was blue. Then I just sort of gave up. I went away to see if I could manage to breathe fire at the people I couldn't get past, but I just forgot about it and tried to do something else. At some point I lost lucidity somewhat and slightly fell back into the plot about these demonic faces. Then I got excited over something and I woke up quite a lot. I then remembered the shapeshifting tutorial, and I wanted to do it. I remembered dream chaining, laid completely still, aaaaanddd... my parents managed to wake me up on accident.

---

Glad to know my practice is working. Not sure what to improve for next time, though. Maybe I should just continue as usual with my practice.

A semi-lucid I had the other night, I was on a street close to the clubhouse in my childhood neighborhood, there was a dialogue going on but I interjected and said "this is a dream" and then the dream exploded into vividness, I started to try to stabilize the dream, I rubbed my hands together, I said "three plus three is..." and there was a slight pause in the dream then I said "six", I looked forwards and feared that the dream was going to wobble and collapse but I did something I don't normally do and I spun around to stabilize the dream, I remember vividly trying to stay conscious to keep the lucid dream alive, earlier in the dream I had become vivid and feared I was going to become too excited to pop the dream but it didn't end at that point.

I was outside with my mom, the dream scene was on a slope against a coast. My mom and I were picking in the grass, there had been some sort of item that had exposed a group of drugs and my mom was on the case, I was acting innocent like I'd never seen it, I threw the object onto the ground and my mom went on to the ground to see it, we were both now on the ground looking at what was originally a small object of drugs turned into a row of acid and molly, while I'm looking at this on the ground with my mom I see a girl from my high school Ol in a lawn chair against the house shuffling back and forth, she eventually gets up, she turns into my older sister, my view turns towards the ocean, I'm wearing a cape, the wind catches my cape and I'm flying down the slope towards the ocean, I think I may land hard but I fly upwards before landing harshly and I land in the ocean beyond the markers, and now I'm swimming towards the shore towards other people who are within the markers.

I am with Melissa inside somewhere that feels like either a hotel or a house. I tell Melissa that I’ve taken one (psilocybin) mushroom and one tab of acid. There is a ceiling light in this hallway; I am staring at it when the psychedelics seem to take effect. The light is either square or circular to begin with, but it swells in size and becomes ovular in shape. It takes on more dimensionality. The light is a soft white. There are shapes on the surface, amorphous and possibly moving and changing slowly. The more I stare, the more prominent it all becomes. When I look away, the psychedelic visual is gone and the light is back to normal. I tell Melissa what I just saw. She seems like she’s paying attention, but not completely interested. Now we are outside. The building is plain and white, two stories, possibly with a stairwell on the outside. It’s surrounded by a large grassy area. The sky is baby blue, and it seems like a very pleasant day. There’s a smaller dog out here; we throw a bone for it. There are two bones, and we start throwing them at/towards each other, pretty hard. I end up leaving (because of how hard we’re throwing them).

Sep 18 2018
(from phone, apologize for quality)
Color coded red, but lost. Annoying bc I really knew it. Need a better way, because I reinforced throughout the night and had it memorized, then lost 100% on waking
Dim room daylight square, person on bed - needs needle in foot, diff sizes available, I argue for smaller F says just use the big one! But point is flat, not sharp! Ask pt and they say bigger one! Have to swap/refill the compartments which have screw caps like soap sponge, the smaller needs a push piece, like in a click pen, I go off to find cups to do the swap cleanly
Clone troopers n beheading (starts as pixelated wii homebrew, then realistic) real uggos (SoMordor orcs) but good swordfights, blocks sort of cancelled out each other, I wasn't lucid, but was using will/intent/control to survive, some real big ones activated before end
School, road, early mornish, parking lot (important, not sure why, maybe had to do w foot)
Long dark hallway, I took drugs (ingested something, no smoking), halloween party, I'm gonna kill, dad, using umbrella to hide, in dark bedroom I'm forced by invisible forces, not in control of movements, (incubated? was thinking about doing drugs inside a dream last night)
College, blind guy, dad, looking for printer or scanner, lights are off but BG memorized rooms and lights come on, he directs us
BG inside lab w others, needs poster - long group discussion abt. honors program, girls knew L from HS who said it was serious but I told them it was nonsense
King of the hill carnival, guys in corner trying me (bobby) and sister, saying we met before long ago, etc. weird simultaneous nighttime and daytime lighting, there were no clear external lights, sun or artificial

I am outside, on some fairly large dock (by the ocean, I think). It wraps around a building and has a few extensions for boats to moor. I attach a long mop head to a pole, dip it off the side and into the water, and start mopping. I go in long, vertical rows. A slightly older and shirtless man is walking this way, so I leave room for him to get by. I believe that the water has been dosed with LSD, and so too will be everyone what now comes into contact with the mopped deck. It occurs to me that I’ll become dosed, as I’m barefoot and walking where I’ve mopped, but I don’t really mind.

I have DMT. This DMT is in the form of little white rings that look just like the lifesaver mints. I have quite a few of them (for a moment I think they’re laid out in a grid). I think I am going to take a ¼ of one - enough for a mild trip.



I have gotten high (from smoking pot, I’m pretty sure). It hits me and is rather intense. I haven’t been high in a long time and its wave is familiar but almost catches me off guard. I am in a room with Melissa (I want to say Melissa, but it also might be Felicia?) and both her and the room’s proportions seem off and fuzzy. She asks if I’m high, though it is obvious. I stumble back into a counter at one point.

I am outside somewhere that looks very familiar - very similar to Frenchmans. There are three lines of people, with about 20 or less in the largest line. I get into the ‘Lovebug’ line and none of the people my age in it look familiar. Someone clarifies that we have ‘moved up’ to Fireflies, so I move over. The lines now proceed up a moderate hill on an old, overgrown dirt road. I am wearing pants and long socks. The socks are kind of annoying on my ankles and the pants are hot and not giving me as much flexibility as I’d like. Someone walking with me makes a comment about them taking us on a strenuous walk. I don’t think it’s bad, but as I look at the incline and overgrowth, I could see how it would be for someone not used to it. We’re now reaching a crest in the hill and a building up here. I end up in this building - a bar and grill or something - with Dad. We’re seated at a table close to the corner and the bar, and we’re going to try a beer here. A lady comes over, I think we need a little longer, then it takes a while for her to come back. Looking out the window, I think about how there’s still a little ways to go. I am now back outside and walking. I’m with Jon, and we’re on more flat but forested terrain. It is greener and almost more inviting. The air is cooler and it is more dim and not as exposed. There is also a small river up here. I think there may also be a house, as Jon is saying and keeps saying something about ‘Jim’. He also keeps saying something about a spider (the image in my head is a large, black one, maybe a black widow). There are multiple wooden bridges across this river as we move onward. They are dark wood pieces placed parallel with the river, creating a flat bridge with supports every few pieces. When I watch Jon walk over some of them, the pieces move, swiveling, like a bead on a necklace. He’s been fine so far, but when he jumps onto one of the bridges, quite a ways from the bank, the pieces give way, causing his legs to slip through and him to be caught on one of the supports. He does have a grasp, but appears mostly stuck. I end up by him (in the water?) and am going to help him up. He places a small, circular, water-logged piece of meat onto the wood and then proceeds to clamber out of the water that seems turgid and turbulent yet somehow still.


I am outside somewhere that seems like a college campus or some other communal area. It seems slightly dim out. I have a pack of cigarettes and am smoking one. Others here are doing the same. I hold it between my middle and index fingers, noticing that everyone else does too. I think Niki is here. This carton is overly large and light blue. The inside slides open, revealing the cigarettes that also seem too large and like they’re made of plastic. I smoke one down, self conscious of my aggressive in and exhales, and want another, ashamedly. I think I smoked it too far? and it felt like the soft plastic piece sort of broke off when I got to the end. I think I now go somewhere with Niki - though it feels not as if we’re going together - but simply to the same place at the same time. Chelsea is here. It is brought up how she’s all but kicked a heroin habit, but is about to take it up again. We try to dissuade her, but she is blank, resolute, inconsolable. It is brought up where she would find the substance, and they say you need only follow this street. My gaze follows it down. It’s well known that it’s not the best place, and must be known for a prevalence of the drug. I think it’s residential, though it seems dirty and desolate out here.


I am outside and moving through some dirt trail between houses in a fairly rural neighborhood (almost like Dad’s). It seems I cover a lot of ground too quickly, almost like I’m watching it happen, instead of actually walking or running. I come to a straight-away that ends in a left turn that dead ends at the side of a house. On top of the path is a dilapidated train track. It follows the straight-away but is a few feet/a body’s height off the ground when it rounds the corner. I wonder how I am going to move along this, as it twists right before the house and may be incomplete in a section. The wall that the track runs into is a neutral color (light blue/grey?) and is slightly aged and worn and bare except for one large window. Through the window I see a partially drawn curtain and two chairs. I can hear people moving about talking inside, and these people are moving out of this house. It’ already pretty bare, but I start moving cups and other everyday items off a shelf. I think the people here don’t know that I am here? I now start moving stacks of DVDs (the ones we have at Mom’s, I’m pretty sure).



Analysis:

Later today, I go on a walk with Mom, on which we seem to come to some realizations about the first and third dreams from last night. What prompts these realizations is the sighting of a small bridge being constructed in a front yard. I find this significant, as the bridge as of yet only consists of the support pieces. I liken this to the recounting of my dream bridge and its support pieces and other swiveling pieces. I tell Mom that this dream involved multiple bridges over water and Jon jumping onto one, only to become stuck and in need of my assistance. I find it necessary to detail the background to this dream having any significance, that being me viewing the movie Hereditary on Saturday night and consequently contemplating a séance of my own with a plausible intention being contact with Opa. mom and I agree on the bridges, water, Jon, and my helping Jon all being symbolic in strict relation to Opa and his passing. Mom is the one what mentions that Jon was the one not present and therefore behind in coping with the situation. I seem to be helping Jon in this process and to me it seems to be because of my recent inclinations towards the idea of performing a séance to contact Opa. i believe the bridges are direct symbols of the ‘bridge’ to the ‘other side’. As I write this I begin to experience chills when contemplating the ‘turgid and turbulent yet somehow still” water, probably because it represents what the symbolic bridge physically bridges. Is probably significant that Jon surmounts the bridge. I am unsure of the piece of meat, as well as any meanings ‘Jim’s house’. During a pause in writing this, currently being unsure of the presence of ‘Jim’ and the spider, I go to the garage. Kneeling down by the fridge (which is right where the Black Widow used to be) I get a pre-recorded phone call in which the voice tells me his name is Jim. i immediately think it’s odd that it’s a Jim, but it isn’t until I’m recounting to Mom that I got a phone call from a Jim that it hits me that it was right by where we had the black widow, the one from the dream. Later on, still unfinished with this analysis, I text Kat telling her briefly what happened and asking if she’s had anything happen that has to do with Opa. She tells me a little while ago she had a dream of him in a silver Subaru, then she mentions how he is probably wishing he could’ve been at the graduation. It then hits me that the very beginning of the dream is probably a representation of the graduation. In it, I say ‘moved up’, which directly relates to Opa, while the whole scene can stand for Makayla’s graduation. As of now, it seems that the annoyance of my long socks and pants is the only part without apparent symbolism. As Mom and I started discussing the bridges, I realized that the train track in the third dream bears much resemblance to this image of a track or some sort of conveyance with missing or otherwise inoperable pieces. I believe this represents the contact or attempt at contact with Opa. The train tracks are an overt reference to Opa’s involvement with the V&T as well as a visual metaphor. The neighborhood is significant as well. I also feel that the tracks dead-ending in the house seems to be significant, as the house is another symbol for Opa or for the ‘other side’. The window conveys pretty much the same meaning, and the two empty chairs do not feel arbitrary. Mom mentions the two chairs that were always in Opa and Oma’s living room, and though that is true, the chairs in this dream were wooden and straight-backed, facing each other slightly, seemingly symbolizing conversation. I think it is symbolic that I never really see the people but only hear them (an image of the ‘spirit world’ or the impression of people contacting it) and also that they are moving out of this house. After all of this, I am left with the feeling that these dreams did not by chance occur so noteworthy and significant-seeming directly after my inclination towards conducting a seance. I with impressed with their impression, considering my lack of detailed dreams for quite a while, and believe that alone makes them significant. And then the sighting of the partially constructed bridge was the conduit for the deeper, real meaning. Every association produced varying levels of chills, which is enough for me to know that I have found the dream’s real ‘meaning’. I believe the dreams were some spiritual connection to Opa or an affirmation towards the idea of contact, with the same feeling of knowing I had about the dream in which he came into Starbucks when I was working, though not quite as understated.

In dream I was on the streets
And by the wall of an apartment I saw a little table with two trugs, they were some sort of things u had to eat, the table description said that it was drugs made by "russian hackers"and that the first is for beginners.
So I took the first one.
then seconds after i started to "hallucinate" : the things in my hand started to shapeshift, and so did the whole dream around me.

Then I saw agent 47 from hitman codename 47 (thats a pc game) multiply into thousnads , covering my vision, then it all got blurry and now I started to see and hear demon faces all sorts of scary shit
and I panicked
and seen some surreal sh1t
Then I snapped out of it and felt sick for real but I still didnt wake up ,only seconds later

note: I copied it from a chat cuz I'm so lazy

Hi everyone!

I had a dream last night..!

I had moved into a new area, it was on the wrong side of the city. I was a new member of a group, learning the ropes, and I had always be on guard. It was because people kept slapping drug patches on people's necks. You had less than a minute to remove them, or the drugs would kill you..!

People were constantly trying to beat the other, so it was a case of trying to stay one step ahead of the others.

Morning of August 23, 2017. Wednesday.



Considering that I neither smoke nor use drugs (even legal medication), this was a rather impersonal dream on some levels, but with the typical preconscious initiation symbolism as since early childhood.

---

I discover two large marijuana cigarettes in a drawer, which I am aware belong to my older half-brother Dennis. Completely unlike my waking self mentality, I am actually thinking of smoking both of them (though this is about subliminal dream state revivification rather than having any waking life relevance). Still, when Dennis shows up, I pretend that they should be shared with him. Curiously, he says he does not indulge in such acts anymore.

For what seems to be a long time, I stand near the end of the Cubitis driveway near Highway Seventeen. It seems to be late at night. I feel very good. I smoke one of the cigarettes, being clearly aware of the odd way the smoke and fire spreads out from it.

Eventually, a team of at least four men show up during what seems to be the next day. Apparently, they are here to search the house for drugs. The main one, the personified preconscious, whose job is to make me realize I am dreaming and thus should wake (to attend to important biological needs), is a chubby unfamiliar man with a gray beard. My mother is present in some scenes, mostly appearing as she was in the 1970s. I have no recall that she had died in 2002.

In another scene, the men are in a meeting in the house. I find a large box which contains sweet grass in a few different forms as well as several other herbs, some braided. I consider that they might see the plants as illegal drugs but this is not the case. They know it is sweet grass and even discuss how useful it is.

In another scene, the preconscious brings out a tackle box from somewhere. He seems to believe that he may find drugs in it (though the real purpose is obviously to get me to think about fishing, which symbolizes activating neural energies to arise from sleep). This angers me somewhat. Still, when he opens it, there are two large globs of stale cat food, though he does not seem to know what it is at first and expresses disgust. I inform him that it is cat food and that the tackle box had not been opened for many years. (As a cat has been validated to be some sort of “guardian” of liminal space as first determined in dreams when I was about five years old, this suggests I am still subliminally attempting to sustain my dream in unusual ways by having supposedly “hidden the cat food for many years” so as to halt a particular shift in consciousness. There is sometimes a subliminal hypnopompic association as well, based on “cats always land on their feet” to downplay the waking start that often includes a falling sensation of which is biological and has no waking life relevance.)

In one of the last scenes, I decide to go into the bathroom, as I still have a joint in my right pants pocket (though no one has checked me thus far) and I plan to stay in here until they leave (and this is likely an awareness of needing to wake and use the bathroom, but the urge is not yet that dominant). While I am in here, the shadow of the preconscious is cast through a window (which suggests he is closer to coalescing as my emergent consciousness). I stand near a different wall, but I still suspect he is watching me and I start yelling at him about spying on people, telling him I will call the FBI, which he seems to find amusing.

The emergent consciousness factor shifts back into subliminal reinduction as the preconscious is now clearly in view through another window. He comes into the house again and I consider that they may go through every container in the house no matter how long it takes. Before I see the preconscious inside the house again, I go into a room that is similar to our oldest son’s room in the Barolin Street house. I drop the joint down a vertical opening between the wall boards (at about elbow level) oriented to the right of the room on the north wall. The tip is barely visible. Perhaps they will not find it, but it still seems a possibility. (Note that a wall symbolizes real-time divisions of neural energy patterns and the more defined division between levels of consciousness. This validates the basic real-time subliminal theme of this dream.)

Getting tired of the presence of the preconscious (and only knowing what his presence indicates at a subliminal level), I stab him numerous times with a dagger (which validates non-lucid dream control as this is something I would not think about consciously in a real-life situation as such unless my life or a family member’s was directly threatened). There is a lot of blood; so much blood that there seems to be more blood than physical volume of his body. Soon, the other officials enter the room and look down casually at the remains. “Well, that didn’t work,” says one male, “He’s still not awake.”

They perform some sort of ritual to resurrect him. His remains transform into some sort of computer console as from the 1950s though I am aware it is female. The men watch the screen and I see a young version of Zsuzsanna walking around, but what this implies does not fully register. (A computer typically represents increasing neural activity in the waking stage as the unconscious does not possess viable thinking skills). I am not sure if they had intended to change him into a female computer console or not. Maybe it happened randomly, but they do not seem puzzled. They turn dials and study the actions of Zsuzsanna on the monitor. “Neural activity increasing,” says the male watching the console while the other two stand around. There is a list of Hz values on the right, the top one being 22 Hz (supposed intelligence enhancement). (Zsuzsanna was awake at the time in reality and had been walking around in the house.)

Then…I am in an unknown room at a table in a less vivid offset dream, sitting with most of my dream’s characters. I am drinking grape juice and notice that I have “hidden” the joint in the glass. It illogically remains in a vertical position near one side of the glass. (There may be an association with attempting to drink through a paper straw, which always irritated me in real life.) I tell them that I do not really care much about the taste of what I am drinking and my dream fades. (Almost all of us wake up with a strange flavor in our mouths. Your tongue accumulates a series of bacteria stored overnight.)

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