non-lucid

Recent dreams included an appearance from Inanna and Dumuzi.

Today's:

Avoiding direct sunlight, I made my way into a bar where I'm surprised to find a certain man - I'll refer to him as my friend. That's a lie, but it entertains me and disturbs him when I adopt a friendly attitude. I sit down and address him by name, and say, "I thought you were going back to Australia."

"This is Australia," he says.

That explains a lot. My aim is terrible, but at least I've got him to serve as a guide now. But to my surprise, he's not at all impressed by seeing me here. I'd really expected more of a reaction. We talk at cross purposes for a while, until he says that he'd thought I'd disappeared with yadda yadda event - I realize he believes he's talking with the hallucinatory version of me who'd been with him for a while. I'm surprised that lasted so long, it wasn't intended to. I explain to my friend that I'm not his hallucination, I'm the real thing. He doesn't seem to believe me.

I sit down at the bar and wait for him to come around, and watch the sun go down through the window. A woman comes over and sits down next to me - on the bar itself, not a stool. We explain pleasantries, and she says a few things that don't make much sense to me until I recognize this as the opening moves of a mating ritual. I start to tell her that I appreciate the intention but our species aren't compatible in that way - and now my friend's hurrying me out the door. Oh good, it seems he's accepted that other people can see me.

In the parking lot outside the bar, I stop and stare at the stars. I'm absolutely in awe of them. I call my friend by name, and ask him, "What am I looking at?" Seeing them in this unfamiliar arrangement is astonishing. He doesn't seem impressed by them, and I can't figure out why - this arrangement must be the one he grew up with, the one he spent so much time trying to get back to, so he should appreciate it. Seeing them through an atmosphere creates such an amazing effect. There are a few wisps of cloud adding to the view - and for a moment a patch of stars appears to be moving, but then I realize there's a children's toy floating above our heads in the shape of a translucent butterfly, distorting the view. I look down at the kids - they're looking at the toy, not the stars. My friend is trying to hurry me along through the parking lot, and I try to impress upon him how moving this is. "Do you know how long it's been since I've been down to earth? Any earth?" He remembers, he was there, and he is not interested in reminiscing.

Short note from an earlier dream today: reading a description of "laurel leaves, called apollon," in which the author acknowledges that they cause strife but states that it's merely like the rebelliousness of an adolescent, and that they are indisputably sacred to Apollo.

Two weeks ago, I saw one anime called Death note. I had one of those notebooks in my dream, and I was using it to kill bad people...
I was kind of a super hero, because I was able to run really fast. I was running, trying to get to my home, and my sister was in a motorcycle doing the same... In the road, there was an army, and when we get closer I saw Hitler was there, and then he and all his army start fire, trying to kill us...

My sister went off the road, and she scape, but I continued the principal road, and I was hitted in the right leg, I really felt some pain in my leg, not compared to a gun shot, but it felt real...

There is a big part of the dream I don't remember...


Then, the other half of the dream felt really real...

I remember all the people saying I was the bad guy, and they want to kill me, then in some place in my house my father was grabing my neck, and he had a nail in his hand. He put the nail near my eye, and nose, and suddenly he start nailing it!! In that moment I was watching all in first view. When he finished nailing I felt again the same pain that I felt in my leg before, when I get shot...

I was dead, I could hear my family talking about that, but then I was watching all in third person, so I was able to see me, and I was crucified...

After that, and a few seconds in darkness, I was alive again, but I dont understand nothing since that part because, all the people, including me, where talking japanese...

I knew it was japanese, because I've heard some words in japanese, but I can't explain what was I saying or what was my dream about since that part...

After a while, I woke up...

I drove to school with my mother and older sister. Mother went to the parents meeting. Sister had really important exams, and I was waiting for them in the school cloakroom. Suddenly the tallest guy in my class appeared. We become aggressive towards ourselves, although he tried to calm me down. I shouted I'll bash your skull! Then sister and mother came, and tried to calm me down. I went outside, waiting for them, but after a while I went back there. My class ended school day, I greeted with one of them, as we drove there in the late afternoon. I avoided interacting with anyone else. I sat down, and waited.

Morning of January 3, 2015. Saturday.



My non-lucid manipulation of my newer dreams have gotten somewhat amusing as I am still seemingly focused on working mainly with my fingers and metaphorically “entering codes” in various atypical ways, some “technological”, some “magical”. This one was extraordinarily long but I will summarize the main sections.

The beginning scenes relate to some sort of miniature people, which are likely to be closest to the concept of brownies or elves. There are thirty of them living under a particular house, though I am not sure if it is my family’s home. They have extensive conversations of how humans no longer see them or regard them in certain ways, which seems problematic for their continuing livelihood. This ties in with some later scenes long after some completely different scenes take place, all in all, about three different plots. Most of the brownies or elves are older males.

The next scene related to the brownies or elves involves being in an unfamiliar residence. My youngest son is there as well as my (deceased) sister Marilyn and several others, some unknown. My son seems slightly ill, with a mild cough. I get the impression that I should call on one of the thirty brownies that live under the floorboards of the house. I seem to automatically know how to do this even though most people have no idea about the inherent “call for help” system. I tap the fingers of my left hand in a particular precise pattern (somewhat like Morse code), which will supposedly bring about aid from the magical beings. After I tap out the code on an end table next to me to my left, I wait. I look towards the partly open curtains in the large doorway farther to my left. I expect something or someone to appear but I am not certain of what or who. I am aware that no one else suspects something unusual will happen or knows that a magical being may soon appear from behind the cloth curtains, which hang to about three inches from the floor.

After a short time, a small younger male “creature” appears and walks into the large room. Instead of one of the previously established brownies of only about two inches tall, he is about three feet high with somewhat darker but yellowish skin and is wearing a plaid kilt and also has some sort of animal fur (somewhat like a brown mink stole - but seemingly more relative to a religious garment) draped over one shoulder. Without pausing, he goes to my son and takes away his cough with some sort of brief ritual.

Later, I am outside with my sister Marilyn and others (including a few relatives of my brother-in-law’s) in an unfamiliar area in an unknown region. They mostly appear as they did during the mid-1980s. I am somehow manipulating time - which will supposedly help my sister somehow (regarding her declining health). A large tree falls over dramatically not that far from us. I am aware that in an alternate reality, this is what killed her earlier on in life. She is to my right and seems okay except for a mild cough. I feel a bit sad in knowing she has already died in one “alternate” reality.

I play with time in my dream and even tell the other characters what I am doing. I deliberately cause my dream to rewind by five seconds and point this out by telling another character to watch the clock. Logically, they should not be aware I am doing this if everything is rewinding (which would “logically” include their own viewpoint rewinding as well and erase their memory), but they do note it, and seem surprised I am able to do this. Eventually, I pretend to make a “mistake” by causing my dream to rewind (relative to the ongoing scene and setting anyway) by half an hour. Eventually, my dream seems to be “playing” with me by accelerating time forward a bit during certain times the clock moves backwards. Eventually, it is near dusk, although the clock shows that it should be morning.

In another section, I am flying over cars in a long tunnel. There is an overpass structure within the tunnel which almost seems to be part of a residence for a time, as I notice a refrigerator near one corner (it may even be part of my house but elevated a bit above the traffic). A foreman from the factory I worked at years ago is there. I fight another character for a time as we do martial arts in midair over the cars. At one point, I throw him into a wall and he disappears even though he seemed fairly confident of his skills at first. I am not hurt in any way.

The foreman asks for my help due to a car carrier crashing into his parked bulldozer while he was on it while the car carrier was going up the overpass and not having enough clearance. I try to get to him quickly as he is still speaking to me, but he keeps falling and rolling down through the rest of the traffic. Eventually, he is run over several times and flattened by his own bulldozer, which somehow slides down past other cars and trucks. The car carrier loses its cars as well; they fall back, hitting some of the other cars that are going through the tunnel and creating havoc though some drivers do not seem to notice at all.

Even though the other male is killed and completely flattened (though without that much blood or gore) I am able to effortlessly resurrect him as his body completely rejuvenates and heals, though he only thanks me in a manner that he seems to think I had only pulled him out from a difficult space from under a part of his wrecked bulldozer. I do not mention what had really happened to him.

I really need to work on not losing the dream 1 minute after I become lucid.

Something didn't feel right. I looked at my hands and saw that I was dreaming. I was in my house at night time, and wanted to go outside so that I could go explore. The dream was pretty unstable so I stared at my hands for quite awhile to try to stabilize. I went to the door to the garage and I was afraid that opening a door would make me wake up so I just walked right through it. Then I was in my garage and the garage door was closed so I walked through that as well but then I woke up.

I was learning about WWII by actually being there and seeing some of it happen. Apparently there was a big flood that trapped thousands of soldiers who drown. Hmm, never read about that one in history books.

I was with a girl in my room who I've never met before but it was like we were friends already. I went into my mom's room and she was slurring her words and stumbling around. I got mad at her for being drunk so I yelled, "FUCK YOU!" like five times. She didn't respond. I thought of how my new year's resolution was to be a good person and realized I was kind of failing at that by swearing at my mom. Oh well. I went back into my room and was crying and I think my "friend" was trying to comfort me.

Two gay men who looked alike and dressed exactly the same were making out on my kitchen floor

Woke up with the song "Sweater Weather" playing in my head.

I remembered my goal was to meet Jack Skellington (one of my lucid dares. Now, I haven't seen Nightmare before Christmas in a long time, and I can't really remember the story, though I think it has to do with different worlds assigned to each holiday. But I know who Jack is, and what he looks like, sounds like etc.)

I recall a game of dodgeball being played in the park in my hometown. Though it was some modified rules to the game that made the game more interesting allowing... well just about anything.

Both teams took full advantage of this. We had a giant ball, easily 20 feet in diameter provided by our team captain. The plan was that we would roll to their side hopefully taking out most of their players. The enemy team two or three of these little tanks with flamethrowers on them that drove to our side of the field and set our players on fire.

At some point, we formally lost the game, though the tanks were still killing off our players. They started pushing the giant ball back as well, they were going to use it as a weapon to finish us off. Also, apparently losing in this brand of dodgeball made you a wanted criminal if you lost, and everyone wanted to kill you.

K appeared and she led me off the field. We went to the bakery in town and got in line. It was at this point that I realized I was very cold. I then realized that I was only wearing a sweater and a pair of briefs. Both of these garments were soaking wet and covered in mud.

K stated that there was some rule in the game that eating doughnuts gave you points, and that if the two of us ate enough doughnuts we could beat out the other team and be declared the winner. She ordered a dozen doughnuts and sat down and started eating them.

It was at this point that I recognized that as a dream sign, someone eating a lot. I then realized that I haven't worn briefs in years, and the general absurdity of the situation, so this had to be a lucid dream.

I made my way out of the bakery. I looked up and looked down, hoping to manifest a new outfit. Yeah, a black shirt and baggy brown pants. Clean and dry too. Much better. I made my way into the back of the bakery, laying down some stabilization as I went.

I found myself in this building. The whole thing was laid out hexagonally and made out of dark brown bricks. As I made my way around, I couldn't help but think that this place was familiar. Yeah, it was. I eventually found myself in this huge atrium room and realized that the building felt very familiar.

"Yeah, I have been here before! It's so nice to have a recurring location happen in a dream!"

Though upon waking the brown building is completely unfamiliar. I wonder if it was some memory that was only accessed during a dream. Or perhaps just faulty logic.

...

At some point I found myself on a city street. I remember all of these people (male and female) parading down the street in silver morph suits. I saw a club and thought that manifesting a sex dream would be fun.

"No, I will do that the next time."

I thought about my lucid dares. The easier one; meet Jack Skellington. I decided that I would carry out this goal.

"I am going to meet Jack Skellington right now!"

I got teleported to the side of a mountain. It was nighttime, but there was a huge full moon providing enough illumination for me to see. I am on a winding dirt road that heads up the mountain. It is a warm summer night. I can make out other mountains and the sea nearby.

A warm wind blows. I start looking for him. For a moment I thought I could make out a skeleton against the backdrop of the sky, but then, a skeleton popped out, no more than three feet tall with a round and rather disproportionate head. It wasn't a perfect circle like Jack Skellingtons, but it was simply two rounded shapes stuck together to vaguely give the idea of a skull. The eyes were small and offset to the side of the head, and the mouth looked just like his character does in the movie. And all that was on a perfectly normal anatomical skeleton body.



When he jumped out at me, I grabbed him by the ribcage just below the neck. We both screamed for a second. I very nearly sent a force wave to blast the guy back, but luckily I didn't.

"Gotta watch out, the last thing that tried to scare me in a dream ended up being turned into a kitten." (That wasn't the last nightmare I had, but it did happen.)

"Sorry!" Jack Skellington had a deep, gargly voice, like the new batman. Though it was very comedic to hear as well.

"So, are you Jack Skellington?"

"Yeah! Whatta you want?!"

"I don't know... to be honest I only planned on getting this far... er... um... so what's it like being dead?"

"I can't tell you!" He said that really fast, as if he had gotten this question a lot. "I can't tell you where and when you will die, either."

We talked for a minute, though I can't really remember what about. As we were talking, I couldn't help but think that he was actually rather cute. Though I guess he wanted to create the image that he was scary. Eventually I doubled back and wanted to see if I could get anything interesting out of him. The dream scene changed to my home backyard.

"So... where and when am I going to die?"

"I said I CAN'T TELL YOU!"

He stormed off. It was funny to watch him sulk as he walked up the stone stairs on the side of our house.

I realized that I really did want to get an answer to that question out of a lucid dream. I began looking for another DC who might be able to tell me. I got the dream ending feeling and woke up.

Not bad... not bad at all...

I was in my home. I had a tropical bug as a pet. The only problem was that it could kill a human with one bite. It had highly dangerous neurotoxin. It was kept in secure place, but somehow it escaped. With my younger sister we were trying to find it. It made lots of nests in my room, but most of them were empty. Finally, we have found him lying in my bed, under the pillow, waiting for me to fall asleep.

Morning of January 2, 2015. Friday.



I am in America during the Christmas holidays, in the backyard of the Loomis Street house (where I have not been in real life since February 1994). I am not aware that Christmas is over, as my dream self perceives the date as December 24th instead of January 2nd.

I have a metallic container made of aluminum, which is like a small loaf pan or bread pan. It is shallower, perhaps half the height of a typical loaf pan, but also longer. There is no recalled backstory, but for some reason I believe I can make smaller Christmas cakes with some sort of technological process that is integrated into the movements of my physical body. There are some unknown people around at times.

I put some sand and dirt from the yard into the loaf pan. It is about one-fourth full at one point. After this, I draw, with my index finger, a one-byte binary sequence across the surface from left to right, which I think is 01010100 (which is 84 decimal, which represents a capital “T”). (It is possible that there is a play on “one byte” vs. “one bite”.) However, I contemplate, with a sort of wariness, that this may not be the right code to make Christmas cakes with. It does not bother me that much, though. To activate the creation of the cake, I move my right hand, mainly my index and middle fingers, from right to left, over the pan while holding it in my left hand. This seems to be a normal way to activate codes, similar to pressing the “Enter” key on a computer keyboard, metaphorically a sort of “sweeping back”, also similar to pushing the carriage return on a manual typewriter.

My finger movements seem to create at least four miniature cakes of which three other people seem to want and so I let them cheerfully take them. I eat the one that is left and it tastes a bit grainy and somewhat metallic and sour. I then consider that the code was wrong and that I have eaten poisonous minerals, but, even though I am not lucid, it does not bother me at all. I still somehow know that I am not in the real world even though I do not suspect I am dreaming. (This is instinctual dreaming.) I know I will not die or even get ill from the highly toxic minerals.

I fill the pan with dirt and sand from the ground again. This time I draw, with my index finger, what seems to be 00010110. This would be 22 in decimal, which, as well as being the Master Number of Zsuzsanna and I, representing “V” (the 22nd letter, which is the bottom half of the heart symbol which twenty-two also creates when one two is mirrored to the other) and nearly endless layered connections, also coincidentally relates to “synchronous idle” in ASCII, which “coincidentally” goes back to being “^V” in caret notation.

I repeat my “code activation” with my index and middle fingers moving back over the top of the pan from right to left (the direction utilized with dream state reinduction).

This time, the cakes look and seem a little more edible, but I am still not certain if they are perfect. Still, people remain happy to take them and no one had gotten ill by that point. Mine does taste a bit better than the previous, sweeter and more like actual cake.

---

On the first day of New Years my Dream Guide gave to me: 1 dream, 2 dream fragments, 4 False Awakenings, 2 short lucids, and a partrige in a pear tree. (Just kidding about the last one).

I hardly EVER have false awakenings. This is probably only about my 3rd time having them in all my time practicing lucid dreaming(which is about 7 years). I would always browse the forums and wonder why there were so many threads related to that. Well now I know..

I was with my sister and we were in the car listening to music on my laptop. We got to a store and I left my laptop in the car with the music still playing and the windows down(What a stupid thing to do) and I didn't lock the car. Then we went inside the store and a few minutes later I realized that I probably should have locked the car. So I went back out side, and sure enough the car is gone. I get out my phone and call 911. I was actually kind of happy that it got stolen because my car is a piece of crap and so is my laptop and I wanted to get a new one.

-fragment about getting Aubrey for secret santa and trying to figure out what to get her

-fragment about getting a galaxy bath bomb for christmas and being very happy about it


-False awakening in which my mom was by my bed telling me something

-False awakening where there was an officer at my bed and I thought he was probably there to talk about my stolen car(from previous dream) but it was super fuzzy, then I "woke up"

-I had another false awakening and I knew I was dreaming because everything was fuzzy. I looked at my hands to stabilize and then got out of bed and walked down the hallway, but everything became so fuzzy that I couldn't see.

-So I "woke up" AGAIN and it didn't feel like real life so I looked at my hands, and sure enough I was still dreaming. This time I could see clearly. I got out of bed again and walked to my living room. It was like somebody had turned the saturation up because everything was so colorful and sharp. I was going to try my goal of flying to space but instead was like, "fuck it, I'm going to have sex."(which I've never done lucid). So I went outside and looked for a guy. There were so many women walking down the street. One of them was dressed like Snooki and was wearing pants and a purple bra and had huge boobs. Finally, I saw a man. He was really good looking. He started walking towards me and he began to take his shirt off but then I woke up.

I was in school. The classroom was old. I was sitting in the front of classroom. We were talking about a boy who died on a heart attack here. There was a girl who can sense his presence in the classroom. I looked all over the classroom, searching for any abnormalities. I took my glasses off, and in the blur, I saw a transparent shape moving all around. When I went out of school, I met that girl and talked with her about that. We decided to find any clues about that boy. We found that he couldn't pass the exams a few times, and spent twenty years trying to finish them, and that he had a descendant. We decided to find this child. Once when walking through a park, we were possessed by unknown forces. I saw myself and the girl from the third person perspective. Yellow light emanated from our eyes. We were aggressive towards everyone in sight. When it was over, we have found out that the ghost cursed us, and we were in grudge with the lords of the underworld. Next we have found the ghost's descendant in the poorest section of town. The man must have died recently, since the child is only a few months old. Another day in school, we were possessed again. Everything went black. When my vision returned, I found myself lying on the ground in front of my house.

Morning of January 1, 2015. Thursday.

Dream #: 17,545-02. Reading time: 1 min 40 sec.



I am in the Cubitis house in the morning. The living room is about four times bigger. The bedroom my father built into the carport is also about four times larger.

I am aware of noise and music from an unknown source (from the northwest). After about twenty minutes, our oldest son’s martial arts class, as it was when he was younger, enters the house through the front door. It is disco music I do not recognize at first. The intrusion and noise annoy me. (I do not question why my son is younger or why the martial arts class will be in the new north bedroom. It does not occur to me that my son had never been to America). I am standing near what would be the eastern wall, near the windows, looking west into the expanse of the living room. It has a slightly shiny and partly reflective floor. (In reality, the house had brown floor tiles in every room, speckled with different colorful patterns on each tile).

The real-life instructor asks me if I mind the music they are using today, some of which is The Village People. Even though I find it irritating, I say, “I can take it or leave it this morning,” so as not to cause an argument (especially as he seems very cheerful and kind). He seems to appreciate my honesty and willingness to allow the class to continue, and they go into the carport addition, all dressed in white martial arts uniforms.

---

Question and answers:

Why the martial arts teacher? He is this dream’s vestibular modulation personification, an association with the emerging (preconscious) awareness required to wake and become active with discernible physicality and coordination.

Why the martial arts class in the bedroom? It is because I am sleeping in a bedroom at the time. This dream is nothing more than a typical wake-up call precursory to correlating with real physicality upon waking. I consider the martial arts class (and music) as “intrusive” only because I desire (liminally) to sleep a little longer.

Why is it in the wrong bedroom? It is so I do not mistake my dream for real life. My son is younger for the same reason. I remain in the living room without the process of wall mediation (entering the bedroom).

This type of dream is not much different from a bathroom wake-up call dream, when a bathroom is inaccessible or “wrong” to eventually produce the realization of the need to wake and answer nature’s call.

---

I kept transferring trains, going somewhere.

I was in a building. Or going inside a building. We're going to the 50th floor. There was sort of entrance or block in a nearby building.

I was on the street. Taft? Aurora? Daytime. I was talking to a guy about school or going back to school. La Salle. I thought about transferring.

Was arguing with my mother about some money that my auntie gave me to save for what ever i needed . In real life i already spent some of that money on some stuff i didn't really need and felt a little bed . So my mom was asking me what i spent the money on and i refused to tell her since it was stupid stuff i spent it on and she would only get mad . My mom never ever asks me what i do with my money . Than she told me that if i would show her that i have all the money that my auntie gave me , she would double it not bad right . But since i knew i spend some of the money my auntie gave me i did not want to do that . Now that i woke up and thing about it , my mother knows my auntie gave me money but she never knew how much , so if i was lucid enough i could have said "yes here is the $20 or $50 or $2000 from my auntie ) and i would not be afraid of lying or .

Morning of December 31, 2014. Wednesday.

Dream #: 17,544-02. Reading Time: 1 min 46 sec.



While contemplating going to sleep (in our bed in our present home) to enter a vivid dream while maintaining conscious awareness, I am unaware that I am already asleep and dreaming.

A city council tractor mower is going over the grassy wayside near the west side of our house without seeming to complete the task. I sit on our bed facing the lounge room, wondering when this noise will stop so that I can sleep and dream. (There is no loud noise in my real environment at the time.)

Our lounge room has the fictitious feature (not perceived as erroneous by my dream self) of a reverse bay window, that is, it extends inward rather than outward. One of its windows faces me though at an angle.

I perceive that the council mower is getting closer to the west side of our house. The directional orientation of the sound is extraordinarily realistic.

The unfamiliar male face of the driver of the tractor mower appears in the fictitious window that faces me. His visage is dramatically exaggerated hostility. He is somehow driving the tractor mower so close to our house that he can look through the window and remain there. The situation makes no sense, as he is also supposedly still driving the tractor mower back and forth at the same time he is at the window, but this impossibility does not trigger recognition that I am dreaming. (Obviously, his face could not be close to the window if he was sitting on a tractor mower.)

I get up and go to the window and place my hand against the screen. My fingers push through the window screen, bending it outward as if it was soft. The tips of my fingers go into the face, dissolving it. Eventually, there is nothing there. (I neither see nor hear a tractor mower, either). I do not possess a functioning dream state awareness, yet I have no qualms about eliminating this entity.

---

Crucial background information: Before this dream, I was in an activity about discernment of this process by moving my hand forward to determine if I was dreaming. In testing an image in front of me, if my hand touched my solid CRT computer screen, it would indicate that I was awake. In contrast, a malleable texture would verify that I was dreaming.

---

Caution: I rarely practice reality checks because they corrupt reticular activating system functionality, an important biological factor of sleep-wake transitions.

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NON LUCID
*My girlfriend was doing something as I watched her thinking about beautiful she was.

*I was eating these strange chips along with an orange.