side notes

The earliest I can remember is trying to fit in and out of a "space station" thats on earth in astronaut gear and talking about how I'm gonna have a real problem with claustrophobia. Later I'm cave scuba diving with A, D and C. We have cool masks that enable us to talk and we're squeezing through these tight crevices with our oxygen tanks scraping and eventually we swim into a cavern where we can surface but it only has the one underwater entrance. The dream is amazingly vivid and despite my fear I'm really enjoying it. We swim back, the caves are lit with underwater lighting and the contrast and colors are awesome. We surface on a wooden jetty that is built for scuba divers. As we're leaving Ross and Nick are going in the opposite direction coming from a scuba class in a pool. They seem impressed that I was in the caves. Later I'm back in the caves with them (could have been a later dream cycle)

I wake up at 7am take the kids to school and go to have a nap at 8am since I'm really sick and off work today. I try to wild and get really close but I wake up every time my body does weird stuff (noises etc.) Eventually I fall asleep and dream about playing soccer at the italian club, apparently Sias from 5fm is gonna show up. One of the guys headers a ball and it looks unnatural so I realize I'm dreaming, I do a nose pinch and my consciousness shifts to my real body (I'm not counting this as it was too short)

This man called me on my cell phone and told me he wanted to hire me to shoot a commercial for him, I was excited and accepted thankfully. He said he would pay me $1500. Instantly I thought about bringing Dan and Rob on to help with audio and such. Since I was deploying this job would be a great and productive time killer until then. I thought about what else to ask the man and finally he went totally silent, I tried to talk to him but he was gone. I remember he was very concerned about the things in his expensive mansion.

I was in this dimly lit room and somehow I acquired this strange object, I didn't know what it was, but when I unfolded it I realized it was a large desk fan that was pinkish and very nice looking. I used it to cool my computer, it wouldn't fit inside the case so I had to just set it under my computer desk. I felt the rush of air it created. I was on the 2nd level of a building.

I fell asleep trying to AP around 8:30 pm. I was way too tired from bodysurfing. I woke up at 2:22 am. I can't remember shit.

I think the key to WILD's and AP is to fall asleep slowly.

I became lucid twice but woke up immediately

I'm travelling somewhere by elephant. Then we're walking on some narrow pathways. We're at the cave churches in Cairo and I'm giving a tour. G was there.

Late morning nap:

I went to have a nap with the intention of trying to WILD. I lay still for more than an hour - no SP . Eventually I just went to sleep. I dreamt that I heard my wife coming home with the kids from school. My daughter came into the room to wake me for lunch. I pretended to sleep and she was pinching my face and stuff. I woke up for real. I did the FILD technique and literally felt something happen in my mouth when I transitioned. I slowly did a nose RC with my dream eyes closed and I could breathe I lay still for awhile trying to calm down. Eventually I slid out of bed there was a moment when I almost lost it cause I could feel my real legs. I remembered the TOTM and immediately went over to the dresser and started looking for colorful objects. I picked up a small bottle with it's lid painted red (I think it was a lip stick bottle) and two female deodorant cans one with a blue lid and one with a yellow lid. I was super happy but when I looked at my objects the yellow lid had turned to green and I panicked. I rummaged through all the items on the dresser and found a glass bowl with a yellow glass lid that was slightly transparent. Happy with that I headed over to the window to either teleport or just go outside, I was planning to find some unicorns. As I approached the window I started loosing the dream. I spun around slowly and felt the wooden cupboard door. It helped and I decided not to go outside but to go and see what my family DCs were up to as I got to my bedroom door I woke up.

12/08

Something about the fundraisers I'm organizing for a trip some young people are going on. Phone call with pastor from Bikers Church about details of fundraiser.

Something about a guy coming for biltong

Dads birthday. Beer and biltong ( google it ) Grandpa - cricket. Sharks are playing rugby against Griquas. Jean Deysel and Juan Smith and Kabamba Floors are in the house. I try to speak to Jean but can't speak (something to do with breathing). Meagan is in the dream.

13/08

I'm travelling of the Kimberley yacht club road with Janet. She is having financial problems and is basically asking me for money. I tell her I can't help her. I'm showering next to the road (in a shower that just happens to be there). P and a lady are walking on the other side. I get out the shower and I'm suddenly looking for a place to get dressed, I go in a cave and suddenly it turns into a warehouse - there are lots of teenagers there we're planning on camping there. There is a trampoline and tents. Piet is in a small office working on a PC. Their are broken forklifts in the warehouse and some working ones. A giant crane/machine comes to life and at first is just randomly dangerous but then it tries to kill us by spinning stuff that we have to jump over and dodge. It turns in to a person and I try to explain that we have permission to be here.

14/08

Walking over a bridge at night
Golf balls in the mud

15/08

Running an event. B and co involved. Event involves dancing and music. B and co supposed to be helping. D is also involved and organises some expensive socks to give away - I get a pink pair . i go to P in an old bathroom attached to a theatre like room. B and co are there I call them down to talk to them and try to finnish p'ing before they get there (I didn't wet the bed which is always a good thing). I eventually get to talk to them and some lady who has higher authority than me is backing me up.

This is bad. Again today I didnt manage to keep still after waking up one single time at seven. My excuse this time is that my cycle was messed up and I was both excited and tired, of course because of Adam Lambert. But as im running out of excuses and my previous success is slowly fading away, I am staying positive. I truly believe DEILD is my key to becoming a dream god, as it fits me so well. But until I manage to keep still in the morning, results will be close to none. What scares me is when I try to focus on a technique like this one, my recall is completely crushed. In fact, the only thing I remember from last night is how Alex sent me a message about what he could put in his luggage. I look on my cell to find out that message was imaginary. Deceptive? Yes. But im keeping my hopes up. I thought that maybe by putting a sleep mask I could control my eyes being closed and focus on movement. But that would include revealing my LD attempts to my parents while putting my hopes in a technique that is far from proven. If only I could recall while practicing at least I would feel satisfied when waking up. That is not the case, however. Using MP3s looks very attractive, as well as vitamin B6 and 12. But until I become a full fledged, dream every night oneironaut pro kickass master, lucid dreaming will be kept far from anyone excluding me. The final countdown has begun. I have only 15 nights ahead of me before school begins again, and until then I must fly. Thats my goal. Until I reach that goal, I will double my efforts and literally LIVE THE DREAM. I will combine all the techniques I have learned and my hard work will prove successful. It has to. Otherwise it will just get harder after school begins. That is why I will put all the chances on my side by doing both DILD and DEILD. No time for WILD and I cant do MILD since I must keep my mantra for stayin still. Whats left? Hope is all thats left.

Countdown to school: 15 Nights

I am in my old childhood neighborhood in England. I am driving correctly on the left side of the road and realize that the road I am on has been changed since I was last there. There is a filter to go left but I want to go straight ahead. As I am in the filter lane, I illegally go straight ahead and am stopped by a female cop.

I am out of my car talking to the policewoman and thinking about how I can get myself out of getting a ticket. I look closely at her uniform and realize that it is strange looking. All the badges are very faded. It suddenly occurs to me that this is a fake cop and I walk away while she is talking and get in my car and drive away.

I should have known I was dreaming when I realized it was a fake cop.

I remember two, probably related, segments, but my memory of them is a little limited so we'll see how much I can remember as I start here.

The earlier segment I can only seem to remember a few random image of. It was like some kind of futurey sandbox FPS scenario. I remember it was night for the duration of this segment, but it was that kind of movie or video game style night where it isn't really night but everything has kind of a dark blue filter over it (except where there's lighting). I remember seeing gray metal husks of tanks and fires all over streets. I was moving from place to place, destroying vehicles or robots or whatever I perceived as an opponent I guess. I'm not sure what my motivation was or what I was trying to do. I remember at one point I discovered a new way to take out some vehicles and was trying to describe it to an outpost of humans/allies but they were refusing to listen so I left them. I remember a segment where I was moving down a large bridge, with vehicle wrecks everywhere, sorta vaguely L4D2 style (only at night and no zombies).

The second segment was similar. There were two outposts of human survivors whose outposts were on an upper level. These two groups made up two Team Fortress 2 teams, the one I was with had a yellow outpost (and appeared on the minimap in the lower right corner of my vision as yellow), which was just kind of a crowded camp with people wearing mostly yellow clothes, and must have been the blue team since my opponents on the lower level were mostly wearing red. Everything on the minimap was represented by small, colored triangles, yellow and green for the outpost bases and control points, and gray for uncaptured control points. The other team had a green outpost (and was correspondingly green on the minimap) and was apparently the red team. On the lower level was kind of a Doom-style research outpost where most of the action took place. There was three objective locations arranged in kind of a triangle formation on the map that we were fighting over. In place of the usual TF2 characters, it was real-looking people just pretending to be the classes. I was a spy, and playing decent, but being constantly frustrated that my backstab was rarely working. I didn't have an actual spy's knife in my hands but I did the backstab animation with my fist and it would only work occasionally. There were a handful of players, both men and women. I remember there was a spy-girl with the spy's mask and blonde pigtails who would spawn and I'd keep following her and killing her because she wasn't very good. There was a larger guy with a red shirt on who was apparently a heavy. He was running around doing stuff and ignoring me as I tried to kill him. I backstabbed him and he said, "Okay, that's one." and I apparently understood I needed to do it twice to kill him but the second stab refused to work. Towards the end I somehow got to see the green outpost and I remember thinking it looked way cooler than the yellow one; for one it was green, there were light green lights everywhere and the people there looked like a cult, in green robes worshiping a triangle or pyramid thingy that was hovering a little ways up made out of the light green light. I remember a little ways before it ended it transitioned into what seemed like some kind of preview trailer for this little dream game where two people were discussing features; the one that one of them highlighted was how sometimes a third team would enter the game, something that was represented by another team (though I seem to remember it was the same color of green) popped up on the minimap and a line moved from their base to the outposts.

A lot of triangle imagery in the second segment.

I have stumbled upon the DEILD technique and I think it suits me very well. Though I didnt have results last night and messed up my recall because of it, I trust it will use both my extremely powerful biological clock while giving me close to nothing to do. I learned that the more a technique is demanding on my part, the smaller the results. In other words, I fuck it up every time. So a quick WILD looks like the right way to go, because DILD is too random. Even when I had my only two DILD, i feel like it was just a lucky shot and id rather induce my dreams. If I get any success with this it may also reconciliate me with the traditionnal slow WILD which has proven a complete failure so far. I also like how you get multiple attempts per night. Even though I have had no results yet, im unaware as of wether the problem is my ability to stay still when waking up or entering a dream. I guess light will shed on this mystery later on. And now, my only dream fragment of the night.

I am in Quebec in my family when I hear my Ipod ringing. I take it out of my pocket and answer. Its Shao but I dont know it. I ask who it is and he answers with something incomprehensible. I go: Ok...What do you want? He tells me to come at his place but im not even at home. I say I am in Quebec and I cant come. Whats funny is that my ipod is no phone, it cant ring!

So, often I have these memories from when I was little and I just can tell if they are real or fake. I think I might have gotten them mixed up with dreams that I've had but I can't be sure. They just seem so real that I believe them. I guess I'll never know for sure..

I'm not going to make these purple because I believe they actually happened..


Please! Don't Take Me Away!
I was really little, maybe even a baby, not really sure, and some stange man was taking me away from my mother and he put me in a black car. I kept screaming for my mom and wondering why she would do this to me. I don't remember where he took me. Once in awhile, I ask my mom about this happening and she's like "That never happened." but I don't really believe her..

Barney Peed in the Sandbox?!
I was watching Barney(just like all kids did!). He was outside at a playground or something and there was a sandbox. He just.. peed in it. Then some little kids came around and were like "Barney! You're not supposed to pee in the sandbox" or something like that. To this day I still believe that I saw that while I was watching tv.

My Favorite Episode of the Little Mermaid
I was wathing the Little Mermaid(tv series) when Ariel got sucked into this hole in the ground with Flounder and they had to try to find a way out but it was really hard to swim against the current that was keeping them in it. They eventually got out, but I don't remember how. This became my favorite episode, but when I recently looked it up, I found no such thing! But this couldn't be a dream, I remember it so clearly because it was my favorite episode!

So.... is it reality or just a dream?

Dream Recall
[]More than one dream a night.
[]Vivid, detailed dreams.
[]Identify a Dream Sign

Lucid Goals
[] First Lucid Dream
[] First Stable, lengthy lucid.
[] Decent, consistent control.
[] Complete Dream Control
[] Lucid Dream within a Dream
[] Fly
[] Explore Space
[] Teleport
[] Telekinesis - Small scale
[] Telekineses - Large Scale
[] Create a small animal
[] Create a large rideable animal.
[] Breathe Underwater
[] World Building
[] LD more than once a month
[] "" week
[] "" night

Last night I decided to forgo listening to the binaural beats WHILE I slept and instead listened to them and THEN went to sleep. I slept much better. In fact I think I was so tired from my lack of sleep the night before I probably missed most of my REM cycle. When I woke up for my WBTB method I couldn't remember any of my dreams. So I did my WBTB method (woke up for a few minutes, checked email, and then turned on binaural beats and laid back down) and listened to the beats for a good twenty minutes. I then took them off and went to sleep. I woke up a good 4 hours later (quarter to ten, waaay later than I normally get up) and had this jotted down:

My wife and I are on an airplane that apparently goes to space. I'm excited but nervous and am not sure how to react. The plane takes off and then just as quickly Leah and I warp to the airport (what they say about speedy traveling in Dreaming is true, eh?) and we are walking around. We are in a big airport that sort of looks like a giant mall. It's really white and really open. We see a line of people at the suitcase rack and decide to head over. Along the way I ask Leah how long we're on vacation for and she says 'Two days'. I'm instantly upset and go, 'What's the point of a two day vacation. Let's go for five.'. We reach the line of people for suitcases and watch as different people run over to a guy handing them out and open the bags up. Dogs keep jumping out.

I should be upset I didn''t remember much but, honestly, I'm just glad I got a good nights sleep. Two more days of Infinity. Knock on wood and let's hope for some developments.

Okies so,

This is the first entry for me here so be gentle, should probably work on shorting down the descriptions a bit, but as I am only getting back into dreamworks (clever ey!) I find it helpful to increase the level of detail I notice, I might start shorting down the forum posts and keep the detailed descriptions to a private journal.

Non-ludic
Ludic
Notes/reflections

12-08-10 Attained lucidity after waking from a dream within a dream. In the first dream I was hearing routine scraping sounds from my living room and I feared these a bit. In fact i feared them so much that I would not go to the kitchen in order to get some water or milk (I knew I had no milk). I decided instead to go to the toilet which was a hotel style toilet (even though it was right next to my room and I have no such toilet I didn't spot the hint) I was sitting in this toilet looking at the details noticing the increased space, but also that there was a sign right next to the toilet that explained what it was in different languages. I returned to my bed and noticed that my duvet was a bit too small that I could somewhat not fit under it and hide from the ghosts of my flat. At this point I woke up (within the dream) and the scraping sound was now louder from the room next door, but this time it was accompanied with a whisper clear in my head and I looked around and saw a transparent face. Now I suspected I was dreaming so got up, confronted the ghost and told him ”you are a spirit, I am dreaming” he tried to talk me out of it, but I tested my thesis by trying to fly, successfully. I landed snapped my fingers and said ”I am dreaming” I awaited a bit to see if the excitement would wake me up, but this waiting a bit seemed to stabilise the dream. I made the face my spirit friend and told him to come along for the ride, saying ”you are created by me”. I went to the corridor of my flat and tried to fly straight through the door, but everything became black as I tried to do so and after another unsuccessful attempt I decided to try the window instead. Here at first I banged my entire body against the glass (without it breaking) and I took a step back, focused and flew straight through the glass without breaking it. My spirit friend was at this point a bit behind me, but since he wouldn't keep up (or I couldn't be bothered keeping creating him) I flew high and low and saw some people on a spot of grass, and landed in front of them. I told them I was dreaming and that they were projected by me and that we should relish the chance to have a party. The scraping sounds had now turned into a full on funky house background theme song that stayed till the end of the dream. I flew down towards the university and a mass of people where gathering, again I told them they were just in my head and they accepted this and things turned riot like, in a good way. A car with some people in it and an angry driver Jacob Kliver, an old football coach of mine approached. He looked angrily at the people in front of him so I flew straight towards the car (to give him the surprise of his life ^^) put my feet first and kicked the window (without breaking it. The car emptied and I picked it up, to the amusement of the crew around me and tried to throw it in a top floor window, I couldn't quite get it to fit although I tried 3 times, but they seemed happy enough that I could throw a car around. However determined to prove that I could achieve some proper stuff I summoned a leather/metal sofa (now getting reminded that telekinesis was also within the realms of reality) picked it up with my mind and planted it halfway through the top window of the building across the road. I flew onwards and decided that I wanted some sexual/romantic action too and wanted to kiss the first girl that turned up, which happened to be a delicate good looking friend of mine reminding me of Sarah. I kissed her, but it was just too wet and I had some fun explaining to the girl that it was probably because I was kissing myself and in an attempt to stick my own tongue down my throat I was drooling all over the place. So I wiped my mouth and flew on without much happening till I got to a night club where I saw Sarah and a guy that had been on a street earlier. The funky house music was now coming from the speakers of the club and we decided to hang out a while. The guy I decided was a pain in the ass and I wanted to erase him, which I couldn't. I had a conversation with the guy about it saying it was funny that I couldn't because in reality he was a projection of my mind (not sure he thought it was funny) they left, after I insisted on getting his name, which he had to tell me twice (Jay 100) and I went to the window and decided to do a full on telekinetic exit I shattered the glass outwards with my mind (explosion style!!) jumped from the window in a huge arc and landed on a radiator on the outside of an adjacent building, to great amusement of some random people passing by (yes it seemed perfectly logical that a radiator would be placed on the outside of a building, at least at the time!). I decided to practice a few dancing moves, but at this point I had some trouble breathing. I took some time to focus and regain my breath, which I did (although I have no idea as to how, when I woke up later I was face down in my pillow). I danced a bit and did some heavenly parcour (spelling?) until I had some trouble breathing again. At this point I became scared thinking I might not wake up even if I was dying because my conscience was not with my body. I demanded to wake up without success, until I decided to close my eyes and focus on my breath (I have only recently tried WILD techniques, unsuccessfully, but apparently they are great for stopping a no longer wanted dream too =P) and woke up, drawing a deep, DEEP breath (after having pulled my face out the pillow).

Notes: This is the second time the presence of a ghost gives me the hint of the fact I am dreaming. This was in fact a wake back to bed attempt as I had been sleeping most of the day after not having slept much yesterday and getting called to work this morning by my dad.

Regarding the content of my dream, the meanings can be interpreted in a standard Freudian manner about desires, fears etc.

Also at some point there were some old school knee pad protectors (brown and fluffy) and I somehow knew I would need them, although they don't figure in the later stages of the dream(s). However I am not sure what dream they figure in.

12-08-10 Fragmented series of dreams. I was somewhere with some friends of mine Kaiser was there. As the end of the trip approached he told me he was looking forward to going to a long planned event with me that I had totally forgotten. Even as he reminded me of the contents of this event I had no recollection of what happened and how I got involved. He later tried to sway me me by having Dukakis on a call and a friend of Duki's asked what and what was happening to me, I believe the place I was supposed to go was Bulgaria. Later on I even took out my calendar flipped through the filled out pages (I should kill myself for not realising this was a dream here, as I oppose diaries and calendars with a passion) and did indeed find the date in mention with a note called “focus fuck” referring to my intentions of participating in this event. I still couldn't remember a damn thing, and although now I was actually getting convinced I had agreed to it, I was sure I hadn't agreed to anything that took place foreignly. When I in the end refused to go, Kaiser was severely disappointed, in fact he was in tears and this touched me. We departed at the train station, actually a hell of a lot of train travelling took place, and I ended up in bulgaria although Kaiser and Duki were not part of this segment of the dream. I met a girl, not a very attractive girl (in fact with a female mustache) but I felt connected to her and I liked her in a non-sexual fashion. We were not able to communicate a lot and therefore we decided to attend a language school together and at this language school the teacher asked who was serious and actually intended on learning something rather than being there to get credits for something. Both her and I decided that we were going to learn the common means of communication. However this never occurred as a demonic (seemed goblin like) police officer turned up in a car outside. He shot the girl in the throat, a fatal wound, and I never managed to catch up with him. I returned to the home of the girl and decided to remain a little longer in the company of her brother. Her brother introduced me to an older brother of his, who had experience and an underground network of people, in fighting supernatural beings. One of these ended up being a warewolf, also a police officer and I was riding a bike with this older brother who told me the gun I had was loaded with silver bullets. I shot this man who was chasing us from the back of the bike, I hit him in the shoulder, but because of the silver bullets this was enough to kill him. As he was dying I noticed that he started to shift (he grew a mean ass set of teeth!) and I also noticed that from the bullet wound a silver coating appeared engulfing the man's shoulder starting from deep within his veins. We returned to the house of the siblings and we went to a field to play some football the two brothers and I (after having ventured on yet another train travel). I somehow had a ticket that would allow me free roaming transport on any train, after having checked this with a controller. In the end I departed and explained to the younger brother of the girl that despite the tragic circumstances I was glad to have gotten to know him better and had a good time. I woke up.

Notes: This is not the first time I have experienced (and missed) trains as a clear dream sign.

Lucidity: 5/10
Vividness: 5/10
Length: ~5 Min.

I was in a giant playground where people were playing soccor, then I saw Toph. And a burst of awareness hit me, I was like "Toph, come here." Was what I was thinking. When I tried to talk to her soccor balls were flying all over the place. When I looked around, she was gone. I tried to stop the soccor balls but it didn't work. Then I saw two jets flying around so I decided to fly up there. I thought "well I might as well try flying." So I just got the idea of flying in my head and crouched for a moment, then jumped. I put my hands up like in super man and I was thinking about falling/failing, then I started to go slower. Then I was "oh crap" and decided to get it out of my head and concentrate on going faster. Then I went faster, I tried to go towards the jets but I almost ran into the building. So I went higher. I was about to try a second time when they came towards me. I think this was how I destroyed them. I just got the idea in my head of destroying them. And they blew up. Then I disapeared and I was like in a camera thinking "oh crap, I lost lucidity." But I didn't because I was thinking it, the camera went over to a building where the blown up helicopter was and I saw some guy down there in a giant suit. So I wondered if I could move him and if this was my body and it was. I went back to 1st person mode and I walked down this hallway. I went through a series of elevators that went side-to-side. One of them had all of these switches and I tried pushing them all. One closed the door so I didn't close that one again, and the other one closed the window. I tried it again and it made it go up and down again. And on the third attempt it opened. I saw these guys in white suites and I decided to attack them. I grabbed them with a giant white hand that I had and they shrunk. The next one I just saw if they would attack me. Turns out they just sat there. So I found a door that I decided to go in and when I got in I looked at the room and I saw a bed, I thought "might as well try sex again, the dreams going to end one day anyway." So I went up to the door that I came in and I tried to imagine what some broad looked like. And said that she would be behind this door when I open it. And some ass hole appeared there. He was trying to get in. I said "hey dude, could you stand behind that door. Thank you." And I closed it on him. The second attempt was a failure too. The same guy was there so I went to the other door that I found because the door fell down. I said that I wanted a hot girl. And there she was, she was short but hot. So I put her on the bed and told her to give me and my friend a BJ. I didn't atchually know him, but whatever. I blinked my imagineary eyes and she disappeared. I was like "not again." I tried to bring her back, but instead I just lyed down and imagined her giving me a BJ. It felt good, but right after that I woke up. I felt like I almost cummed. I was like "oh crap" and checked, but it's all good.

This one was way better than the other one. And I've decided that flying and destroying stuff is alot more fun than sex. I'm gonna try water bending next time. Yay.

Picked up another short fragment tonight: the alarm clock went off late, causing my wife to freak out for a moment as it give her virtually no time to get ready for work. I also fairly vividly remember looking at the clock itself, which read 7:43; my wife usually leaves the apartment about 7.

I'm certain this was a dream because the front door of the apartment closing as my wife left for work (at the right time, around 7) woke me up again, as it occasionally does. Additionally, the alarm woke me up finally at the time I usually get up at 7:30.

Unfortunately, when I was awoken by the door closing I had memories of a much longer dream, but my wife returned to the apartment to write a quick note on my computer so I couldn't get up immediately to write up a DJ entry. In this time, my mind wandered a bit and by the time I returned to thinking about the dream I'd managed to forget all the details.

Last night's lesson: I need to find a more efficient way of taking notes. It'll be a bit of a challenge though, my current sleeping arrangements don't leave a lot of room for keeping a notebook somewhere that doesn't require a bit of movement to get to.