side notes

I woke up in my room but everything looked strange, the desk was different, and things were kind of wavy.
I thought maybe I was having a false awakening. I thought about it, and realized it even felt unstable and felt like
I was dreaming or thinking really hard rather than having just woke up. I looked down at my hands, and they were really blurry and weird looking.
Practiced moving objects 'with my mind' once I realized I was dreaming, lifed my entire to a sitting position using just my mind, but mainly because I was
afraid to try to move my 'dream limbs' and wake up. Anyways I ended up waking up after a short while I lost concentration.

answered my phone that was buzzing, fixed this thing on my wall, went back to sleep...

first thing I remember I was biking downtown on a bmx. random.

went to a party - climbing through ropes and stuff to get downstairs because, according to the DCs, there were loose bricks above the arch way and they didn't want them to fall? - really random..

-fragment-

I was in my res room - using my laptop and checking my email - I got an odd virus that would only let me use IE, which I hate. Dream sign - things not working properly - ended up waking up (after this fragment) and being like thank god fuck ie, etc. Kept getting weird text messages (phone not working right) in this fragment.. I remember I had actual mail on my bed (weird) and after opening it there was two leather passport-shaped leather things. One of them was addressed to me, one to s___ bow__. The passport like things had our marks for our courses on them- i remember mine was a 90 xD - and had some kind of military markings on it - sergeant I remember but with weird markings - i came to the conclusion that it said master sergeant. I realized there was a problem with them and they must've been addressed to the wrong person - after all s___ bow___'s was there which was really random. I remember wondering how the hell I was going to get them back to the mysterious sender. Later on, a____ came in, looking kinda like a player or something with his collar popped and a cigar in his mouth. he also had some kind of glasses on that made him look like eminem or something. xD He asked me if I got my marks and I said yeah (the pasport things?), he said yeah man its sick or something and lit his cigar. I told him not to smoke because the wind was blowing inside the direction of my room and I didn't want the fire alarm to go off. I looked at the wall as I pointed to the fire alarm and it was kind of like a leftover fragment of the backing of the alarm- like someone had torn it off the wall.
-fragment-

next thing i remember i was talking to a guy about the party, how the chicks there were all filthies - i showed him a text from my friend that said a couple of the chicks were squirting.. xD the text in the message kind of kept changing when i was trying to figure out who sent it to me, but i didn't really notice it consciously.
semi-lucid here - i was at what looked like res but i knew it was different - i got lost walking around after argument with two people being in my room when i didn't want them in there
weird-cartoon-looking cop showed up and asked if we needed help. i told him i was alright and kept going, should have known i was dreaming - he looked fucked and i was pretty much far away from my room at this point so I don't know how he knew about the argument.
I ended up walking out of res (getting lost) and ended up in something similar to Walmart somehow.
on my way back ran into s____ and she said she would help me find my room cause i was lost but then ditched when she ran into her friends.
I think maybe after she ditched me I ran into my friend that I talked to about the party, but that doesn't make sense because I know I got lost in res/had the argument with those people that were in my room after talking to him.. But I remember finding him as the first person when I got lost and finally found my room so I don't know..

-fragment/dream memory-
I remember that the strange version of the school is a fragment of another dream where I was riding a BMX through the different levels of res during the summer,
but the building was all torn down and destroyed and in this dream the res looked similar colours to my res rather than the abandoned building.
so the res was basically made up of the abandoned building from a different dream but painted, and with a walmart. xD
---------------

-fragment-

I remember at one point h___ kissing me then pulling away and shaking nervously, folding into a ball on the bed saying, "its the drugs im so sorry its the drugs" etc. while i tried to comfort her.
------------

-fragment-
i was at the end of a hallway type thing and there was glass, on the other side of the glass was a bank.
I remember looking and seeing there was a red switch type button at the bottom, and an emergency exit button at the top..
a cop saw me looking at the glass and she pulled out her firearm and shot at me by accident because i was standing by this glass? soon as she fired she put her hands up as if to say - oh shit no
all the sudden i was at a bus stop, and she had shot me through the side of it. no more hallway or bank.. :S
she ran over to see if i was okay.. i remember after she shot at me asking myself - am i shot? and coming up with the answer, no i feel no pain - but I lay down anyways because i had a plan - i told her when she made it over to me that if she didn't want to get sued she had better get me a prescription to some pharms.
then she told the paramedics i was fine, and to leave - and then she tazed me. (maybe this was my phone vibrating?)
pretty much woke up from there - no more dreams after that - my phone's alarm went off

Something weird happened tonight.
It's 11:00 pm and I go to sleep. I lay at my back, my hands on my stomach and I look at the ceiling. I get sleepy and close my eyes. After 5 minutes or so, I start feeling dizzy. I get a buzzing sensation. I realize that this might be sleep paralysis. I try move my hands. I can feel that I'm able to lift my hands. I stretch my arms out. I still have this buzzing sensation. I think about it and than I realize that it is impossible to stretch my arms out, because the bedsheets were lying on me! I open my eyes. I feel that my arms are still lying on my stomach. The buzzing sensation goes away.
I think about it a few moments, I'm confused. I turn to one bedside. And again after a few moments I get this buzzing sensation. It drifts away and comes back. It repeats itself a few times. I try to take advantage of this and imagine that I was moving my dream body.
My eyes are closed, everything is dark I start to see a dimmed light. I see that I'm in a cinema. There are a lot of people. A DC suddenly vomits on his neighbour. I feel very dizzy and the dream fades away.
I do a RC and I realize that I'm awake. I turn to the other side and sleep this time without any buzzing or so, but also with no dreams

I remember feeling - in between sleep paralysis - this overwhelming feeling of fear, and a very dark presence being very close to me - like I was standing and she was right there, but a dark and terrifying version of her - the ex again, right in front of me. I just want to get over this. We were talking in class today on the stages of grieving, and talking about how some people may think they have reached acceptance when they are still in the depression stage. I feel like my consciousness is in the acceptance stage while my subconscious is still grieving and depressed/angry..

Hoping for a lucid dream tonight, back home so hopefully i'll get a good nights rest

I'm sleepy and too lazy to write out my latest dreams in detail, so I'm just going to quickly jot them down here so I remember to write them in detail tomorrow

Dream 1: (Halloween night) Told my friend I want a new job. Frustrating work dream. Man captured and taken to the back room. Forced to tell his story or else. Witch posses his wife, and now he has lightning in the back of his throat. Witch comes, I run. And parkour on the roof. Lucid, we escape to the forest.

Dream 2: Me and the Lost crew are in a mansion. Widmore attacks from above, the island is shaking, were hiding in an elevator. We escape, yay tacos!

Dream 3: Lucid. Parkour on the tree with friends. Friend is stuck in a wheelchair so I try to help him fly, but he's too heavy.

Dream 4: Work dream, lady wants wedding clothes and lots of gold paint? Old apartment. Night time stroll. Later. Sis, mom and me look at the stars. Climb roof for better view. Amazing sky!

Dream 5: Hans is secretly married and hiding in his bedroom. Later, Liz goes out for food, at 12am. We wait for her by watching movies, but we fall asleep. See my sister in the morning and I ask her what took her so long. But then I realize the being in front of me isn't my sister because she would never do that and this is kinda freaky.

Dang! I'm a missing a day!

Church Play

Non Lucid

Dreaming about running around this camp type area surrounding a huge church which had been in my dreams a few years ago. It's made of stones with mortar in between, big stain glass windows, nothing too fancy. Small parking lot surrounding immediate area, and further out, were open fields of short, green grass with sparse trees. Further still was a forest. I don't remember too many details but I was running around, maybe hiding from someone. I was mad, I was breaking things, and being destructive. Then people were attacking me, and I was fighting them off. They were organized. Maybe SWAT. Idk

My Girlfriend woke me up and talked to me for a few minutes, then she left and I went back to sleep.
-----
Part2
Lucid w00t!

I am back at the same church. I am about 4 feet away from the wall. Between me and the wall is a decorative section with bushes and small river stones. I pick up one of these stones and hurl it at the window. The window spiderwebs, and I move on. (Here is where I realize I'm lucid) I feel that I'm in Spartan Armor (I was playing alot of halo 3 the day before) I look up and see parked in one of the spaces is a WWII tank like the one in the picture above. The lower half is painted gunmetal gray, and the turret part is white with a blue lightning bolt on it. The turret adjusts and levels at me, and I realize it's about to blast me. I start running for it, and I'm running in slow motion. All the while I'm thinking 'Man this is so amazing! I'm actually controlling this!' I finally reach the tank, it still hasn't fired. I jump up on to the turret and the momentum of my run slides me across it to the hatch. With one hand I lift the hatch, and with the other I grab the driver by his shirt and lift him up. I then take hand which opened the hatch and with all my strength, I hammer him in the face with a mighty punch. I wake up.

This is my first Lucid since joining DV. Before now I had only had 2 lucids and they were both DILDs. It only lasted 45secs or so, but it was awesome. I'm not sure if this is a DILD, or a WILD. I believe I was lucid from the beginning, I just didn't realize it. Idk, if anyone can shed any light on it, I'd be grateful.

Also, this was the first time I've every been able to punch someone in a dream. I've tried many many times before, but it's always felt like I was punching under water. My arm and fist would move so slowly that it would barely have any momentum when it reached it's target.

Awake, Non-lucid, Lucid, [Commentary made while awake]

[I apologize in advance for how much of the page this entry takes up. It was my longest lucid dream to date, though, and I wanted to make the best record of it I could.]

I'm at my old high school, outside the entrance to my mom's old classroom. The open-air entrance on one side of the classroom and the semi-enclosed atrium on the other side are reversed from the sides they're on in real life. I'm listening to an old woman [Betty J.? Aunt Edie? I'm not sure] talk about life. I also remember reading some text about how in the old days, we just lived together with love and respect for one another as a matter of course, without any need for external forces like social programs to manipulate or engineer good feelings between people. [Yep. That sounds like my mind, all right.]

I'm playing PackRat. [Again. I am so sick of dreaming about PackRat, and I know perfectly well that the only way to stop dreaming about it is to stop playing it. That'll happen at the end of this year, I hope.] I discover that the reason an old collection cannot be completed is that they created all the cards, with artwork and everything, but never actually made them available to players.

I'm looking through a rack of envelopes of photo prints, organized by the subject of the photos.

I'm reading a novel on a shiny, black electronic reader. The last page of one chapter has a small illustration of a rolling, bouncing boulder on it [this illustration is from a particular PackRat card]. The electronic reader has small, rectangular “previous page” and “next page” buttons in the lower right corner. It also has readouts in the lower left corner of the screen that show remaining battery life and how many inches from your eyes the screen is. It says that a distance of at least 9 inches is recommended. I see my reflection in its surface and am surprised to discover that I'm wearing glasses. [I don't wear them in real life, but I might have to, someday.]

I go to say good night to my dad. He shows me that he's discovered a way to screw this cylindrical part onto his guitar so that it still has its protective plastic cover.

WBTB at 3:58 A.M. I stayed up for 10-15 minutes, taking notes on the dreams I recalled so far. Then I listened to the second half of my binaural beats file and continued doing affirmations, this time including remembering to stabilize my dream as one of them. I then spent about 45 minutes being kept awake by my coughing and sneezing, but eventually, I managed to get back to sleep. I think I even experienced sleep paralysis for the first time ever; I remember a moment when it felt like my body was vibrating or shaking really fast.

When I find myself in House #1, I immediately know I'm dreaming. [Since I was lucid from the very beginning and can remember a little bit of the sleep paralysis, I think I may have just performed a successful WILD, even though I didn't originally intend to.] This time, I succeed in remembering to stop and take in the scene before doing anything else, in order to stabilize the dream. Once again, I gaze around in awe of the fact that my mind can create such a detailed and realistic environment. Everything looks real, even though I know it's not. I walk around the house a bit, and when I get to the sinks in the bathroom and kitchen, I look at the faucets and quietly expect them to turn on, and they do, without my touching them. [I think that's pretty cool.]

I go out into the study, which looks pretty much just as it did in reality, except that the space inside it is entirely filled with spiderwebs. I turn back and go back into the house, with spiderwebs sticking all over me. When I come back in, I accidentally let a spider into the house, too. It has a big, nearly spherical body with stripes in two different shades of gray. I squash it while it's walking along the wall in the master bedroom. Then I discover another, even bigger, red spider/crab thing on the carpet, and squash that one, too, saying something about how sorry I am for making a stain on the carpet. [The carpet I squashed the spider into was light brown and semi-shaggy. House #1 never had carpet like that; that's the kind of carpet we have in House #3. I didn't notice this until after I woke up, at which point I found it highly amusing that the details of the carpet had been off in one of my dreams and I hadn't noticed. ]

My mom is there in the house. [I don't really remember the specifics of this part, but] I lie down on the bed in the master bedroom and get under the covers so that my parents won't see that I'm quivering and shaking in the throes of SP. [I don't even know.]

I decide I want to leave the house and go explore other parts of this dream world, but I feel obliged to take leave of my parents first and tell them where I'm going, but I want to keep it a secret from them that I'm dreaming. I say to myself, “If I told them I was going to school, would they believe me? Given the setting, they might.” As I say this, what I have in mind is that I'm going to pretend to be setting out on foot for my junior high school. [Funny; that was the only school I ever took the school bus to. I did walk from my house to the bus stop, though.]

I walk through the side yard toward the front gate. I find my parents in the corner of the yard, where the wall with said gate in it meets the wall of the neighbors' house, doing some kind of yard work. I say, “I'm going to school. Bye, Mom!”

“Bye, (Emiko)!” says my mom, and it sounds exactly the same as it always does when my real mom says it. [Obviously, an unaltered memory.] “Have a good day!”

“You, too!” I say, or something like it. I walk out through the front gate and down toward the street. The neighborhood seems more spacious and spread-out than it is in reality. Now that no one is looking, I begin flying, taking off from the middle of the street and traveling parallel to it and upward from it at an angle, like an airplane taking off.

As I fly higher into the air, the dream and my dream consciousness start to fade away. Now, having read the DEILD tutorial, I had some idea of what to do. I lay absolutely still in my bed and concentrated intently on the dream I had just been having, willing myself to start dreaming again. It worked. [First successful DEILD, too! I was really on a roll last night!]

I end up in a group of interconnected, upstairs rooms in a building somewhere. I seem to have flown there. The rooms are white, and there are chairs, upholstered stools, and bookshelves in them. From reading a plaque on a wall near a doorway, I learn that these rooms are reading rooms dedicated to a strange alternate take on Christianity, centered around an alternate set of gospels written by different people. [I didn't recognize it as any sect that exists in real life.] One of the rooms has an analog clock on the wall. It doesn't have numbers, just a circle and two hands, all made of the same rough, gray metal. Even though I already know I'm dreaming, I deliberately look at the clock, glance away, and then look at it again to see if the hands have jumped. The first time I try this, they seem to be in pretty much the same position they were in, so I try again. The second time, they've jumped to a totally different position. I am pleased with myself; again, I was expecting that to happen, so it did.

I leave these rooms and start walking down a flight of stairs. The dream starts to fade again, but again, I manage to stay in it through sheer willpower.

The stairs end in a wide hallway. There is a set of double doors to the right, leading into a room. Judging by the decorations and items outside these doors and inside the room, it looks like there's a wedding going on. Am I the bride? I wonder, but when I enter the large, rectangular room and see the retail-style displays of clothing and stuff, I think, Oh, good. Just a fair, then. I see a real-life friend [I forget who] to my right, who says to me, “Cute dress, (Emiko)!”

“Thank you!” I answer, even though I think this is an odd thing to say, because all I'm wearing is a damp, clammy black blanket wrapped around me. It feels like it's made of swimsuit material. I continue further into the room, turning to my left and walking that way. I look down and to the left, between two racks of clothing, and see another real-life friend, Eleanor B. She's wearing a royal-blue bridesmaid dress [the one she was wearing the last time I saw her in real life, which was at the wedding of some mutual friends]. I call her name twice to get her attention. She looks up, sees me, and stands up to talk to me. I come over and talk to her. When I take a closer look at the clothes hanging on the rack we're standing next to, I say something like, “And are these the new Christmas sweatshirts from Target? Cute! I want!” The sweatshirts are white and have patterns on them of snowflakes made up of narrow lines, either in shades of pink or shades of teal. They also have hems and seams in those colors. I take one pink one and one teal one off the rack and carry them with me. They feel soft.

I leave that room and find myself outside. In the distance, I can see big mountains with snow on top of them. I continue exploring and somehow [I don't remember the exact route I took] make it into an old Japanese temple (or residence, or something). It has a very old, very traditional room with tatami mats on the floor. I pry off each of my sneakers in turn, using the toe of the other foot (suddenly, I'm wearing sneakers, I think). [Yes, I actually thought that while in the dream. Now that I think of it, I think I was suddenly wearing regular clothes, too.] Leaving my sneakers (the exact same ones I have in real life, I note) out in the passageways, I enter the room with the tatami mats and walk around in it. I can feel the mats and my socks under my feet. I say aloud to myself, “Wait – we're allowed to walk around in here? Oh – of course we are; that's what I was expecting.” Yet again, something is so because I expected it to be so. [In all my real-life experience visiting historical tourist sites in Japan, we were never allowed to actually enter the rooms with the tatami; we were only allowed to look into them from the outside. I always wanted to walk around inside them, though, so now, in a dream, I got my wish. Cool.]

Outside of this room are some passageways that are all painted a dusty shade of teal, and have wooden signs hanging in them. I walk around in here for a few minutes. One of the signs says “Telephone,” and indeed, there is a pay telephone on the wall in a wooden box. It looks like an old tourist facility.

One of the doorways within these passageways leads into a spacious, modern restaurant that I recognize as the one inside the onsen [hot spring] that I visited while I was living in Japan. There are a few people sitting at tables here and there. I walk through the restaurant, looking for one of my real-life friends [I don't remember which one now]. I don't find her there, so I decide to head for the restaurant's exit and go somewhere else.

The way to the exit is through a long passageway with a wall on the right side and an upholstered bench on the left side where guests can sit and wait for tables, which separates the passageway from the rest of the restaurant. There are two people sitting on the bench. As I approach the door, I think, What shall I do next? Task of the Month – cell phone – oh, yeah! For a split second I think of getting out my cell phone to text somebody, but then I remember the new Task of the Month for November. I turn to one of the two DCs sitting on the bench, the one sitting nearest the door, who happens to be a black, pregnant woman. “Hey, can I tell you what I'm thankful for?” I say to her.

“Okay.” She straightens, sitting forward on the edge of the bench, listening to me.

“I'm thankful for my family, and [something else I can't remember now], and my computer, and for being able to come here!” I say. [Meaning, to the dream world.] Unfortunately, the dream starts to fade again just as I'm finishing my sentence.

FA in which, instead of being me, I'm Cobb. Mal is there when I wake up, the real one. [They're characters from Inception.] We talk about something, probably the dream I just had. [I don't remember now exactly what it was we talked about, but dude. That was a really weird FA.]

FA in which I count my fingers while they're spread out against the legs of my jeans. When I find I have a sixth finger on my left hand, my reaction is, “Oh, damn. Gosh-darn it!” Apparently, I really want to actually be awake. But I'm still feeling sleepy, so I lie down, sprawling over the sides of the white, wooden bench I'm sitting on.

When I woke up for real, I just lay there for several minutes because my body still felt heavy. I recalled my dream and was pretty impressed.

--------------------------------

Side notes:

That was the longest lucid dream I've ever had. I'm also very impressed and pleased with the number of times I succeeded in controlling what happened just by expecting something to happen. I really got the hang of that skill last night. Finally, I'm amazed that I managed to stay lucid for that long, and to force myself to keep dreaming so many times when the dream threatened to end. Wow!

For the last two nights have had excellent dreams, but havn't recorded them as time has been an issue in the mornings. Anyways, have been taking melatonin past two nights which explains it. Going to try wilding tonight with 100mg of b6.

non-dream - non-lucid - lucid

05/11/10 The dream starts off with me waking up (FA) with a firm intention on playing World of Warcraft again, so I can get used to the new talent/gear system before the release of cataclysm. When I look at the computer I notice my monitor is standing on the floor. I have some sort of false memory forming that I can't remember the details about, but it makes sense that it should be there. However as I put the monitor on the desk I notice a plant on the desk, this is not unusual, however what is unusual is that it is half of a plant that I have recently moved away from the desk and I actively tell myself “this is not right, you are not supposed to me there” which results in a spurt of semi lucidity that quickly fades. There is something else that I can't remember.

Skip

I was at the recording of a TV show, reminded me of a Friday night show-type-of-thing. There were 3 people and I only recognised one of them, John Lithgow. He was wearing a big funky looking purple hat that eventually he threw on the floor, proclaiming that the place smelled like shit, his hat caught fire and he stamped it repeatedly, eventually extinguishing the fire only to find the hat covered in turd (an evolution of the old children prank although I felt like it was done intentionally). We leave the studio and this old woman, John and I go for a walk, it seems really absurd to be holding hands with the woman who is also holding John's hand as you would when taking children out for a walk.

I gradually become lucid during this, and I spend some time just looking at the scenery. When I have had enough I proclaim to the woman that since this is my dream I want to do something else so I take off in flight, but the old woman grab one of my ankles (not sure how, might have been some sort of tentacle, mental or otherwise) and slam me to the ground. I get loose and take off again this time flying backwards to keep an eye on the lady. She doesn't seem like a bad person she just think it rude leaving like that when this is the first time John Lithgow is lucid (WTF!?) in any case I think I ramble something like we need to show him what it is really like so flying might not be a bad idea. I am satisfied that my flying abilities are spot on, no wavering in the power.

I call out “MITZU!” and fly towards the place where the recording of the show took place. I am happy to see that she is in the queue to get in. I land next to her and find her eyes (I have to check that it is really her, still not sure about my abilities calling out for people) sure enough the lovely yellow eyes are looking up into mine and I go to kiss her on the cheek, she turns her head in a similar motion and I end up kissing her mouth instead, it doesn't become awkward, so I just continue to ask “so what are we going to cover today?” and I feel the dream fading and just manage to think “damnit!” before I wake up.

…

I am in a first person shooter level or something of the like and we are 3 party members, here one is a little boy that can't help himself and is an easy victim (this is important as Darth Vader seems to be drawing power from this person at the crucial time when I am trying to finish him off!) I am running around trying to figure out what is going on until I face Darth Vader with a staff type red light sabre (suppose you could call it a light staff, just doesn't sound right) and I figure out what is going on and turn on my own two (so pleased that I am dual wielding blue and green sabres in my first Jedi themed dream). He kicks the shit out of me the first time. I quickly re-spawn and soon I am facing him again, this time I get him to almost no health in pure sabre combat until both our weapons (both of mine) breaks. Now it comes down to force on force skills. I have a bit of a health advantage as indicated by the bars next to our heads and I manage to catch him in a force choke that takes his bar to completely drained without finishing him off. He catches me in the next and I can see (and sense) that in that particular skill he is stronger than me, however I seem to have a speed advantage and manage to catch him in the next, but it is unstable and his health is increasing. The non-verbally explains that it is because of the boy, either he is drawing life from him directly or my concern for him makes me weak. In any case it is a draw and I just remember feeling anoyed about the boy before I wake up.

…

I am in a capture the flag type game, and the map is long as hell. This seems not to be a problem as I can transform into a wasp at will. I am heading out on a mission as a wasp and I have to avoid some green clouds in order to not get sick. I manage to do this. I fly to the furthest flag and hide in a corner trying to overtake it, but quickly realise that Mark is in the house next to it also contending it. Damnit, he is a formidable foe! I transform into a wasp and fly into the house and starts flying around him stinging him a couple of times to get him out where I could transform back and surprise him. There seems to be friendliness about the whole game. After having stung him 4 times he taunts me to do it again, I don't dare as I know I don't have many stings left before my sting will be permanently in Mark. I dare not sting. And he starts swinging at me, a lot! I really want to get out of the house so I can transform back, but Mark seems to be blocking the way, damn! I wake up.

Notes: Although I hoped to speak with Mitzu, the themes of the following dreams seem somewhat “guided”. Seeing as shape shifiting isn't my thing and I have never performed a force choke (or wielded a light sabre for that matter) before. In particular I remember the shape shifting as me activating a skill by pressing a mental button, activating it. Recently I was shifting between human forms as well so this might be me learning how to do this, albeit I am not lucid while learning it. This might be a good thing as I have a very limited conscious imagination and hence need my subconscious in control to make it happen (hope that makes sense, it does to me anyhows =P). Also it is nice to notice the scenery checks finaly working for DILDs =) (the plant on my desk)

[Now I'm all caught up. This one is from last night.]

I'm in a [completely unfamiliar] house where my family is staying. My mom is temporarily adopting a baby named Ana from some woman. Inside the house, I pick up P., who is maybe 5 or 6 years old (small enough for me to pick up and carry around) but still thinks and talks like the 19-year-old she currently is in reality. I'm supposed to call her Ana in front of our mother, but I accidentally slip up and call her P. [I don't even know.] There is an actual baby Ana somewhere in the house; I see her there. While walking around outside the house, I pass by the baby's mother as she's leaving.

Our family has also gotten a small, fluffy white dog. While I'm lying in bed in my room in the aforementioned house, the dog comes and jumps into bed with me, and I pet him and snuggle him. He's warm and soft, and I decide I like having a dog. [I've never had one in reality.]

My family and I are walking around on a street outside, at dusk. The neighborhood we're in looks rundown and old, all one-story houses and vacant lots. A bigger dog runs up to me and jumps up onto my clothes. I'm scared and try to tell him to go away [just as I would in real life], but he doesn't knock me over with his paws, and I decide the experience isn't actually as scary as I had thought it was. [Hmm. That's the second time I've encountered and overcome a longtime fear while dreaming, although I wasn't lucid this time. I hope this trend continues!]

We continue walking through the neighborhood. I recognize a lot of the people living in it as students from my ESOL classes at DePorres, which I know is also in the neighborhood. I say to my family, “If I randomly say hello to people, they're my students.” After a short while, there's a crowd of at least 20-25 people accompanying me on my walk through the neighborhood, and I recognize at least two-thirds of them as my students. I say aloud, “This is the best neighborhood ever!” [Not only were my students much more spread out across the area than that, but the neighborhood around DePorres isn't quite as rundown as it was in this dream. Also, I notice that when I dream about Florida, sometimes it's bright and sunny, and sometimes it's darker and grittier than it actually is (well, darker and grittier than the part of Florida where I lived actually is, anyway).]

We come upon a vacant lot that is all dug up because people are in the process of building a playground there. Standing on top of one of the piles of dug-up dirt, I say, “This wasn't here two years ago.” It makes me happy that something is getting built there.

I have recently decided to cease all contact with a friend - S - and for some reason I have started having dreams involving her. They are not solely about her but she features in them and I rarely dream about people I know. It's kinda strange, I am not thinking about her consciously but obviously she is on my mind...

Lucid

Dream

1.

1p on Monday, 3p on Wednesday and 7p on Friday - the clubs way of socialising. An old bum stole Porygon we had Golem. From the bottle-o. I had S' umbrella to return to her. We were going to eat Golem.

2.

I was jumping off of waterfalls and it was just so nice being free in the air. Also I should buy $12 gloves.

3.

I was on a large wooden ship. There was me and the captain and possibly someone else on board. There was a 'fake' humpback whale like creature in a round cylinder. It was not alive but we were going to make it live. We had a vial of fake blood which we gave it and then suddenly it became living.
I realised that it was growing too big for the current cylinder so I moved it to another cylinder. Still it kept growing. So I opened the cylinder and it went down one level and we swam around and then we went all the way down to the bottom of the ship - it was all full of water. One half of the ship opened up and the creature was set free.
I jumped in after it and was very happy. I was young though and had to go back to the deck. They sent me somewhere whilst on my way I passed a school and the kids saw something (me?) and were curious. And the owl said 'teacher I think you better bring in your students' which were young animals.

4.

Car racing and a Plane crash.

5.

On a street and a boy teases a girl and another boy comes in and grabs some food off of her. I (?) in 3rd person see it and I am about to do the right thing, the boy focuses his attention on a kid with a basketball, when an old man comes out and forces the boy to be nice.
A young woman gets really sick and she is incurable the old man gives her something to feel better and off I go.
My other friend is in trouble so she is lying down on a bed, floating above it. I ask for the sick points and they appear, then I ask for the worst one to be taller than the others and it does so and I thank it. I become smaller and enter into the girl. there is blood on me but I am in the throat so I don't understand where it came from. Another person has followed. We are floating freely in the throat and then we are where her eyes are. I have a vial to administer...

non-dream - non-lucid - lucid

03/11/10 I am playing battlefield with a couple of friends, but we are more than usual and the difference is that we are actually there. I manage to find a good spot and snipe a couple of my friends before I run out of ammo. I throw a grenade or two, jump into the river and swim across, I have been spotted by one, but I throw my last grenade at him and keep running. I get him. I run back behind a building and find them at the same spot, but now I have the high grounds behind the wall above them.
I get compliments from the guys.

...

Something about having to change hotels because my mum, me and Åse (friedn of the family) still had traces of Salmonella so we had been booked into a different hotel.
The logic baffled me
we had already come home from holiday
why do we need to switch hotels
in fact I am lying in my bed right now
ah she must mean a different trip
and I am actually not in my bed
I can see that now
(Nominates himself for lucid miss of the year! ^^)
Something about cooking some food, although we were in a hotel, running around the rooms like mad.
(skip)
We were back at an old house my father built and there were loads of signs of him extending the house thoroughly. Marie was there and I was pointing out that now she could see for herself how much he was improving the house.

...

I was with a girl in a city setting that reminded me of Amsterdam. There were a lot of canals and we were heading back to my place. In the mean time the girl was contemplating if she really wanted to come as I had chickenpox and she hadn't had them yet. We were chatting a bit and our lips touched, not quite in a kiss as she was still a bit unsure, but she purred with excitement. She really wanted to come and in the end she sort of justified it with a “well they might be airborne within 10 years anyway”. We were on a really weird route back, a route that involved climbing across windows that where adjacent to the canal. At a certain point she tried to push me in, but I managed to grab hold of a rail, but I quickly realised that the rail I was holding on to was too high for her to reach, she quickly decided to just jump into the canal and follow that way. She had a ball that she threw at me while I was hanging up there and I laughed saying “I knew you were gonna do that”. I was looking forward to getting back with her, but I noticed the dream starting to fade (even though I never became lucid, even at this point) and I was a bit disappointed.

nope no dream recall tonight

I spoke to one of my gurus about my lucid dreams and he gave me some new directives, so I might have to change my commitment to the ToTY, ToTM and RPG's tasks, 'cause I need to be full-time focused on the tasks he gave to me.
My teacher also told me to relax and not to be so obsessed about having lucids every night and to once in a while not even care about recall - just sleep. He realised my excitement about LDs and shared dreams and the whole shebang and he said I was getting too amused with my dream experiences. The objective of my dream practice is not to develop a whole alternative life, but simply to train the mind to realise it's only in a dream and to carry it on to awaken life.
He told me to whenever I become lucid, just sit and medidate. I was not happy about it, but I know he is right, so I will do that as much as possible.
Flying and sending laser beams from my 3rd eye and meeting other LDers is fun, but my goal is enlightnement, so I must not get stuck on fun.

Real life Dream Lucid Dream sign
For me to remember, dreams are 067300, lucid dreams are the color below blue, #4169e1, and dream signs are the light purple, which is up one and left one from blue, #483d8b.

I lucid dreamt today! Oh my gosh! This has increased my will to lucid dream ten fold!

Lucid dream
All I remember was I was in a white room (this dream wasn't very vivid at all) when suddenly I became lucid! I was so excited I started to feel the dream falling apart. It's a strange feeling. I felt like there was an aching heat in me (but it wasn't a bad feeling) and I was slightly disoriented.

Normally when a dream fades from me, it's different. Usually when my dreams lose stability my REM cycle is ending, and I will start to become intensely disoriented, and fall to the ground. Everything in my vision will smear together and fade to white. I guess since my dream lost stability for a different reason, it felt different.

I thought of what to do from my experience on the forums and the only thing I could think to do was rub my hands together. I don't even remember seeing my hands, (maybe it was because my dream was so unstable) but I did so and things improved a little. It might have lasted ten more seconds because of that. I was so happy and thought to myself 'I'm aware that I'm dreaming!' until I woke up at 3 something AM.

I thought in my head "I WILL remember this dream!" over and over, and went back to sleep.

Sci-fi dream
I remember none of this dream but it was sci-fi in theme.

When I woke up at 8 AM, I did remember this dream, but not the lucid dream. I started thinking all about it in my head. Then I thought, 'Wait a second...' and then remembered my lucid dream earlier that night and got really excited. In my excitement I completely forgot the sci-fi dream, but who cares? I remembered my lucid dream!

Last night changed my general beliefs of dreaming in these ways:

• Lucid dreaming isn't impossible for me!
• People lucid dream many times before they finally remember one- as you can see here I almost forgot my "first" lucid dream.
• The above means that dream recall might not improve your lucid dream count because of recognizing dream signs more, but simply because you remember more of your lucid dreams! (This is just an idea, and might not be true)
• I had an idea a while ago that remembering dreams is like following a train of thought. It seems to me that recollection of dreams seems to never be put in short term memory. When I began to think about something else, I completely forgot my dream, and that might be because the dream was just something I was thinking about, not something in my memory. This could be why most people remember their dreams in the morning, but as five minutes pass you forget it. (This is just an idea, and might not be true)

(Good -- um... afternoon, everybody. On the weekdays, I usually write my dreams in the morning, on my subway ride in to work. But this morning I didn't think I remembered any dreams.

Then, sitting at work (really stressing over something, in fact), I suddenly recalled this dream. Weird.

The dream is weird. I'd say at least part of the influence on it is the fact that over the past couple days I've been reading Jack Kerouac's Book of Dreams. In one dream, Kerouac meets Dinah Shore. That dream was so charming, I think I also wanted to have a dream where I met a celebrity. So my unconscious obliged... kinda.)

Susan Faludi was out in the desert doing research on a new book she was writing. The book was similar to The Terror Dream. But this book had less to do with feminism and more to do with some general national conspiracy. I probably identified with Faludi or saw through her eyes.

Faludi had discovered whatever it was she had been trying to discover. She may now have been standing by her car in an empty road in the middle of the desert. Faludi may have slammed down the trunk or hatchback of her car with an air of finality.

She intended to go somewhere. Instead of taking her car, which now may not even have existed, she flew up into the air, possibly by means of a red and white striped parachute.

She flew away to her right, along the road. She knew that she actually needed to head along the road, but in the opposite direction. She flew over a small overpass. This overpass was a landmark telling her she was definitely going in the wrong direction.

The wind was carrying her in this direction, although she "had control" over "her power of flight." She kept telling herself that she would work up the momentum of the wind in order to get swinging around in the correct direction.

But she kept flying and flying in the wrong direction. It was now night. Faludi was in the woods. It was cold and snowing. Still flying along the highway, I/Faludi (I definitely was part of her decision making process here) saw a billboard. The billboard was on a 50-foot tall, steel column.

I knew that if I/she grabbed on to the guard rail in front of the walkway before the billboard, I/she could stop the uncontrolled flight and at least get my/her bearings. So Faludi grabbed the railing and did some kind of elastic flip onto the walkway before the billboard.

The walkway was snowy and lit by a few fluorescent flood lamps. Othewise, everything was snowy, cotton-grey dark. Some pine trees may have reached as high as the billboard.

Faludi huddled behind some weird, clear, plastic rectangle which I figured was some kind of a solar panel for powering the billboard's lights. Faludi thought she could call someone, perhaps her husband, to pick her up here. But it was just so cold, and she felt like it would take forever for someone to get here.

I had a false awakening. I was going about my "daily life" when somebody, possibly my mother, told me that Susan Faludi had died. I was really surprised and upset. I regretted the fact that I'd never gotten to meet her.

But it also seemed weird that Faludi should have died. She had always seemed like such a healthy person to me.

Somehow I saw a photo of her -- possibly on the web. The photo showed Faludi in a motorized wheelchair, like they have at the front of grocery stores, the kind that look almost like cars or scooters with baskets on the front. Faludi was overweight, with short, grey hair. She wore a white t-shirt and black slacks, both of which were sloppy and tight on her.

Again, this didn't make sense. I thought, There's no way Faludi could have changed this quickky. I began to doubt seriously whether Faludi was in fact dead.

(Just one small note on this, from November 14th. After looking at some news images, I realize that the image Susan Faludi is hiding behind in the snow is a teleprompter. I'm not sure why a teleprompter is hanging out on a billboard. And I'm not sure why I thought it was a solar panel.

But, then again, I'm still not sure why this dream involved Susan Faludi. The actions in this dream are completely the opposite of what I feel Falud's actions would be. They're more like what I think my own actions would be. So maybe the dream is saying I wish I was like Susan Faludi, but that I'm just still horribly, embarrassingly like myself. Oh, well.)