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In our backyard, we have an old sandbox from when I was a kid. I'm 16 now and I don't use it anymore. So this spring my mother and I decided to grow potatoes and onions in there, since those plants like sandy soil.

Fragment- I went into my old sandbox and everything had grown a lot. The plants were far from mature, but they were certainly a lot bigger than they were now. I took one out of the ground and saw that there were several peanut-sized potatoes dangling from the roots. I then tried to put the plant back into the ground but for some reason it was a real hassle.

Fragment-I was out in my yard holding a curved stick. I was in my yard swinging it around like it was a Katana. I was perhaps bored or a little angry. I just hacked away at imaginary foes for a short while.

My parents and I were sitting in the room of a house that wasn't ours, or as far as I knew. I forget what mom did, but she hit something to make the house flip upside down. We were then dunked into the ocean, and the ocean water splashed about the room of the house, bringing a lot of fish in as well.
a fragment. oh well.

I'm in a room, there are kids everywhere, and my friends are there. I get wind that that it is a religion class and I, along with the other kids who went through the class in past years, are going to teach the class for the year. I am pissed off now because I am agnostic and hate when religion is shoved down my throat. I yell and stomp and leave. Somehow, in the process I get pissed off at my friend and he gets pissed at me.

That friend and I are running down a mountain trying to hurt each other. I get to the bottom of the mountain and hide under a tarp/tent. He finds me and starts kicking a soccer ball at me. The feud randomly ends and he is gone.

When I come out from under the tarp, it is a camp site. On the picnic table there is a bunch of shot glasses. I decide I am going to go back up the mountain/building and apologize and ask for my job back (because I want money). I figure I'm going to need some alcohol to do so? In the shot glasses there is only oil and marinade. As I am leaving the camp site I see an old guy (possibly one I know in waking life) pouring shots for himself. He hands another kid the bottle to put away. At this point I really want to steal the bottle, but figure I won't be able to get away with it. I leave the camp site.

I am climbing ladders and going through hatches to get to the top of the building. It is difficult because I have to hold open the hatch above me, while putting the hatch below me back. I make it to the top. I say to the woman who was running it, "Hi... I was here yesterday and quit.... I'm really sorry... Can I have my job back...?" She hesitated and says yes. There is also a game room near by that everyone has won prizes from. We begin walking down a long spiral ramp in the beginning. I wake up.

This was a pretty fuzzy dream, but I think it's actually pretty obvious why I dreamed it.
Religious stuff- Because I "came out" as agnostic/atheist to my mom yesterday.

Campsite & marinade- I've been stressing, I am going on a camp out with Scouts next week. I'm vegetarian (temporarily), and I am nervous about what is going to happen when I don't eat their food.

Job- I have been looking for a job with little success.

Bwah.

[COLOR="#483d8b"]- Some couple fighting in a store.

- I had just left the schoolhouse, it was 2pm and I suppose Tuesday. I was walking to the parking lot, but before that some of my friends wanted to talk to me. There was L and E, even though irl I had just met E, she was pretty friendly.
Okay, then I could proceed to the parking lot only to see that I had missed the bus again. I walked til the end of the small road, checked the time on my ipod and when it was a few minutes past 2, I was sure that I had missed it and started walking to my mom's workplace. Then I woke.[/COLOR]

Can't recall anything else right now.

[COLOR="#2e8b57"]lucids[/COLOR], [COLOR="#483d8b"]non-lucids[/COLOR]

I was at some carnival type of thing like Luna Park and Ihad the thought that when I click I would find 2 dollars on the ground and it worked. So I tried repeating this and it worked eventually I got a lot of money any some of the money was from a different country. I was at a store with my mum and I saw a kid from my school which I kind of make fun of and kind of am friends with. Jack. His mum was there and she was a from slovak speaking country like my mum. Russian, and they were in some family crisis kind of thing which explained why Jack was upset or something.

Dream One: I'm walking across my aunts yard to my Grandpa's house (same Grandpa's house pig guy tried to start a fire the other day and I blew up at K) I see a group of five people hanging out on and around the porch. The porch is like it was when I was a kid, open to the outside (they made it a closed in porch when Grandpa's cancer got bad) I get closer and see that the people are the music duo Blood on the Dance Floor, and two guys and a chic that must be their fans or friends or something. They say hey, and even though they ask my name and introduce themselves, they treat me like I belong in the conversation just as much as everyone else. I tell them it's cool to meet them, some of their music isn't too bad. I don't know their names, but the cuter, chubbier one offers to give me an autograph, but I don't have any of their cds, I download their music w/ DRM rights from my ISP's music program. They say that's cool, and just give me a cd with an autograph. Cool. Then I turn around and see a mirror. I'm wearing a tunic, belt, and green hat like Link form the Legend of Zelda. I'm really confused by this. Someone else shows up then in matching Link cosplay. I'm asking "wait, why am I in links clothes?" and every laughs and says I must be too stoned because I've been wearing the cosplay the whole time. I keep trying to tell them I've never done drugs before and never plan on it, but they are all just laughing and goofing off. That's not the end, but it's all I can remember.

Dream Two: I'm at the house my mom lives in. It's a HUGE house, and in waking life she wants my husband and I and my Grandmother to move in with us. There's a male presence, he doesn't say anything as far as I can remember, he's just there watching over me. It's got to be Vesta. I spent some time last asking that he come give me some advice since I've given up on being lucid while I'm so stressed. I can't even remember to do reality checks with everything else in my brain :/ Anyways, I'm thinking about moving there and how maybe I made the wrong choice telling my husband no. Then I try to do some magic, I want to do something with a bracelet that will help me with my dreaming. I find I can't draw power or anything. I feel like my magic is blocked or drained away by the place (not surprising as my mom is a self proclaimed psychic vampire :/ ) and I'm even more sure this option is just wrong. Things are good where we are now. I'd just gotten away from mom's stress when I had the dreams that led me to finding dream views, but then the stress started again and the dreams that helped me find interesting things stopped. If I move then I won't feel like I have any power anymore, because her and the stress and problems she creates for me and my family will only be worse. There's a reason why I avoid seeing and talking to her even though she's only twenty minutes away. Upon realizing this in the dream, I wake up.

Warning, begin rant. Another night of stress and barely being able to sleep. I'm up five hour early again. Still arguing with my husband about moving, with no end in sight. Plus, I'm tacking on the added stress of realizing that dreaming has become almost meaningless for me. I don't know when it started, probably around November/December when we started having outside stress from my family and my nightmares starring my mom began... But my dreaming has shifted from being a deeper, more enlightening and all together exciting experience to feeling shallow and pointless. I should have taken note of this earlier, but looking back at my book of discovery the last few days has reminded me how my dreams used to leave me waking up feeling mystified, and yet enlightened. These days they feel like little band aids to patch all the problems I have in life, and not at all spiritual or enlightening like they did before. I rarely see K or Vesta, and when I do they're merely trying to calm me down and make me feel better. There are no more dreams that feel like lessons or tell me what to look for when I wake up. I rarely do more than mundane superficial crap in any of my dreams anymore. Even Lucid dreaming, which I had originally hoped would help me find some of the answers I'm searching for isn't working. The few times I have been lucid, I haven't actually looked for any of the answers I intended to find. I get excited and run around like a smitten puppy looking for K instead of even thinking of the answers I want to find. I know this stress will pass eventually, but right now I feel like I'm on the wrong track and need to turn around and get back on track. /Rant

I seem to remember being in the midst of some kind of battle on-board a battleship, at one point somebody was driving a tank inside a giant enemy vessel and had to square up against some kind of giant super-vehicle owned by a mechanised Napoleon.


Dream 2

I was ordering food inside a rather large fast food store that served sandwiches etc. I think my mother was waiting for me in the car but when I returned she was missing and I believe there was some anxiety over this as I tried to find her.

Last night I had a couple of dreams but I couldn't be bothered to waking up and write them down
Later on I remembered that I did a nose plug RC and could breathe, don't remember what I did next so maybe just forgot a lucid

Just had this one.

It started out with me trying to get some sleep in my room at my mom's house. One of my subordinates, a girl, was in the room with me along with about two of her friends. I don't know what they were doing but they were making a lot of noise. I thought about getting up and just flying up to the clouds to sleep on them instead. I decided to just get up. As I was about to exit the room, I remember trying to show this girl that I knew how to go through walls. I kept trying to put my arm through one of the walls but I couldn't get it to work, lol!

I left the room and must have flown some place because I was now in some other place that kinda looked like a sewer but it wasn't at all. It was a tunnel made of stone blocks and I was hovering over very, very deep water checking my cell phone, lol. I saw a school buddy who I hadn't seen in ten years after graduating from High School. He was also hovering over the water talking to me. And there were other people there just conversing. One of the other guys who was there was my subordinate. He did something as I was about to levitate to solid ground that made me drop both my cell phone and digital camera into the deep water. I hadn't known he did it until later.

I managed to rescue my phone via psychokinesis but I was unable to extract my digital camera. My cell phone was missing the battery and back casing when it came to me. A tall skinny guy with glasses who was there came over to me and told me he might have spare parts for my cell and he wasn't going to charge me. So, I gave it to him to fix. Now, I'm somewhere else and I'm surrounded by people. I went over to some guy who sells lost and found items and asked him if anyone bought a digital camera. He said _____ bought it for $9.00. That guy _____ was one of my subordinates (1 of 3 in this dream). I was pissed. Somehow I found out that _____ had done something to make me drop my cell and digital camera. He must've retrieved it somehow without me knowing which would explain why I was unable to extract it from the deep water.

So, I went to go see _____ and I found him standing in somebody's yard. I didn't see the digital camera but I knew he had it on him, that bastard. We exchanged words but I don't remember the conversation. Then I flew away until I was a good distance away from him. Then, I turned around while flying away from him and motioned my finger as if to say "come here" and the digital camera slipped out of one of his pants pockets (I guess) and flew towards me at a very high rate of speed. It easily caught up to me even though I never stopped flying. He found out immediately and flew after me. I led this traitorous bastard to some kind of hanger-like building that didn't have any front doors.

I landed and ran inside and that guy was right behind me. Somehow it got so I was standing in front of the doorway and he was at the back of the hanger. Then he charged at me and we locked hands and he was pushing me back. I knew exactly what he was going to do because I recalled being beaten by his transformation a very long time ago (dreamworld memories, lol), which was that of a giant Manticore with horns, very similar to the one found in Final Fantasy XI. I ran outside and he followed but stopped just outside the hanger.

Then he transformed into a giant black serpent that was taller than the hanger even though all of it wasn't standing up. I said to this guy "I'm not the same as I was before. My master is Koloran Flash." I've no idea who or what that is. And I grew and grew! I was now looking down--I mean FAR down at the little hanger and this itty-bitty black serpent. I saw my large coiled body and tail and realized that I had turned into a skyscraper-sized cobra. The black serpent was looking up at me wide-eyed and teeth clinched. Then I said in a monstrously deep telepathic voice "Stop wasting my time!" And I cracked this black serpent on the back of its head with the tip of my tail which knocked him out of my sight. I guess that killed him. That's the first time I've ever transformed myself into a snake. Transformations have always been the hardest thing for me to do but it worked without a hitch during this dream.

Now, I'm sitting up in a bed and my remaining two subordinates are sitting in chairs, one in each corner. The girl is complaining saying stuff like "why did you do that? he was a cool guy." And all kinds of crap I didn't care to hear. I said something like "he stole from me, so he got what he deserved." The guy was all cool and stuff and didn't say anything. I didn't get to look at his face but he had a long scarf that hung down. I think this guy kinda looked like Blade. Then I told the girl that she will simply have to work with Taboo (the male subordinate). I've no idea where these names are coming from, lol. I woke up to write this stuff down.

Soap Opera Castle

I was in the room with a woman who was the mother of a family in a soap. She was in her mid 50's with short, thick, slightly dis-sheveled brown hair. She was curled up on a sofa, and she said, "This will be the best story yet." She was referring to something that her family had done, not the fact that a soap is actually a story.

I thought she should be embarrassed about what her kids had done, but she didn't seem to care. Her kids were men. The butler was in the room, though I didn't see him. I thought the mother should be embarrassed with him there, knowing what the kids had done also.

The mother was looking out a window, or windows. They were large, plate glass. She looked out over a castle. My view was like in a helicopter as I flew over the land and got a moving view of the castle. It was incredible.

I could make out the architecture. I can't describe it, but the castle was isolated on an island, though still close to the surrounding mainland.

I was explaining to my daughter that they owned the castle. That's what it is to be rich; you can just buy everything there: the castle and all the land.

I said, "That must be a fjord?"

I came in for a close-up of the landscape. I saw hills with clover rather than a thick turf.

Dream skip

I was lying on a sofa with my boy. I was thinking about going to the store. All of a sudden I'm going to sleep. Clearly Lucid is in the room. Iwl, my windows were open and I'm very cold, so in my dream I can see my breath.

Clearly Lucid starts talking to me about our tomatoes, and he strated telling me what he thought about the rain and the cold on our newly planted tomatoes.

My breath was visible in the room. Even when I was breathing in. I thought that was odd. It kind of scared me. I kept focusing on my breath breathing both in and out noting my visible breath.

I then saw some kind of light as I was waking up.

I shut the windows in my room cause it's freezing in here.

REI

I was going to REI to use some points I had. Iwl I am a member and have credit there.

I started walking down a path to get to REI. It was night time and kind of spooky. I got to a a small pond that I needed to cross to get to REI so I could buy a life jacket.

I rowed across the pond. The boat was very unstable. There were large fish in the pond and I sensed danger if I tipped over.

I made it to the dock on the other side. REI was right there by the water. I walked up a bit of an incline and talked to a lady outside who worked there. I told her I was there to buy a life jacket.

Somehow I needed to get there 20 minutes before closing so their system could take the money and ring me up. It was barely 20 minutes before closing. She said that she couldn't ring me up because the system wouldn't have time.

I was pissed! It seemed so stupid. I said, "Fine. I'll buy it at the other REI. I went over to a rack where there were life jackets just for the trip back to the other side of the pond where I came from. I pulled one down but it was like a full length jacket. I got another and it was the right size.

I then saw a door that led to a room. If I went through, I could get to the other side of the pond, but I wasn't supposed to go that way. I asked about it, and they said I could. They were going to let me, but they said I shouldn't. I said, "That's OK. I'll take the boat and go the normal way.

The dream ended there.


DV DC

A DV DC wouldn't let me call them by name.

I was in some kind of company building, and the place I was sitting on was very much like the living room in my secondary home, there was some dude staring intently through the window (actually it was a door with a big window), searching for something in an inappropriate way. He was kind of annoying but I didn't care to much, however someone else went there (he had a small dog with him) and opened the door to see what's going on (there was a big dog out there, however the small dog scared the hell out of him, which I found pretty funny). When I was looking outside a moment I saw something shooting star like, but it was somewhat bright outside and due to it being pretty big I figured it was an meteor. Kind of thrilled I went outside to see what was going on and then I managed to spot some planets in the sky, at first only a few, then about 10 which were coming closer. 2 of them were somewhat earthlike so I wondered if one of them was earth, I kinda zoomed in but saw that the continents didn't match earth so they both had to be different planets. Now really excited I ran around with something particular in mind while thinking. I was running across a large plain with several different zones, some even separated by fences, some vegetation here and a few smaller buildings there. There were a bunch of Chinese looking people everywhere shooting with small water guns at people to keep them from moving around, and while some of them thought it was a game, the people in some area noticed something was up when a big wave was coming in, they were trying to do something against it but I figured to keep running, as I was about to leave the place I came to the conclusion I've got to be dreaming so I did an RC and became lucid. The dream was somewhat really instable and I tried at least 3 different stabilization techniques (looking at my hands, rubbing them together and my WSS) without success. At some point I also wanted to go in some certain direction into a grey looking forest for no reason and used super speed and flying with great success until I got tangled up in a tree at which point the dream finally started to collapse for real. I kind of managed to stick to it hard enough so that it just minimized into a smaller window and even managed to force my dream to tell me how stable it was, then I got a big red font across the window, like this:

Stability: 18%

The number was changing somewhere around that value and I didn't manage to pull it up anymore so the dream faded. However only into a false awakening which strange enough I didn't manage to catch up to. I woke up in an unknown room, my girlfriend and some other girl were sleeping in the same room, and I got up to write my lucid down like I'm used to, apparently we exchanged a few words but the dream already faded, and this time for real: I woke up.

4/19/12

DILD

I couldn't record this for a few days so I have some fragments based on the notes I took.

I was lost with Dr. Grant from Jurassic Park. We eventually escape from some compound we were trapped in. I become lucid and fly around a bit.

I am looking for a way into the metaverse so I find a TV. It is off, but I crawl right through it. I end up in some building and forgot about my metaverse goals. I meet another guy, and I am teaching him how to be lucid. He is looking for a girl and I show him that you can just grab any ass nearby. I eventually go up to this girl and start hitting on her. He is lucid too but doesn't do anything cool. I try to show her how to fly, but we are inside, so I end up jumping to the ceiling and grabbing onto a ledge. I am hanging by my fingers. She doesn't seem to excited to explore lucidity. I go up some stairs to the second floor.

I lose the dream, and I eventually get a new environment. I go into the same building as before, and I try to go up the stairs. There is a brown leather chair facing down the stairs. I sit in it and ride it up. I find the metaverse TV around the corner.

I lose the dream and come back. I go into the TV again, really expecting the metaverse. I enter an all black world. I try to visualize the street behind me. I turn around and there is a green outline of a city. It seemed like a computer world. I fly over and the buildings become more real. It looks like Las Vegas. I fly over a pool and fall like 50 ft. I land in the water, but it is only 1 ft. deep. I get out and walk around before losing the dream.

I had this dream where I was stuck. No matter what I did to try to wake up nothing worked. I can't remember entirely what happened. The only things I do remember is moving around and seeing black silhouettes or something like that flashing around me. I could feel my own body move and everything. At one point i thought I was awake. I was at school talking with my ex.(This dream or whatever it was happened some time after she broke up with me.) she said she wanted to get back with me and she was acting differently. That's when i knew i hadn't woken up. I even said out loud and fell to the ground clenching my chest
"This isn't real. I'm still dreaming and I haven't woken up." I said

Thats all i remember. That and finally waking up. I was terrified. I had no idea what happened.

Can't remember last night's dream gaaaaah. Damn work schedule and insomnia.

I may remember it later then I'll post it. It helps that I write in here at all.

Paradoxically Stimulated and Sedated [Trip Report]
L-Theanine
Date: April 21st, 2012

Dose:
T+0:00: 400 mg, oral, L-Theanine

Today I decided to give L-theanine a run after reading that it had some stress-relieving effects and reading about its pharmacology. It increases levels of GABA and dopamine and has some affinity as a NMDA receptor antagonist, meaning overall it's a sedative, stimulant, and dissociative. The bottle I bought had one 200 mg pill as the recommended daily dose, so I chose to double it for this test; the LD50 is said to be very high. As a final note, I'm feeling rather sick today so my resulting lethargy may have skewed the results slightly as far as how much energy the dose gave me goes.

I took the dose in the early afternoon and waited for it to set in, totally unaware of how long it was supposed to take or what the duration of the effects would be. Within half an hour I was feeling noticeably sedated, but not necessarily enough for me to say it definitely wasn't placebo. But by the hour mark I could feel a bit of a head fogginess that I recognize from other GABA drugs, and the music I was listening to had started sounding wider and deeper. Though this could have been from NMDA antagonism, I'm going to say it was likely at least mostly from the increase of dopamine. The mood it created was one of being paradoxically stimulated and sedated. Figuring that staying on the couch would be a waste of a dose, I decided to go for a walk in the nearby park forest.

Unexpectedly, once I actually got outside I had a good deal of energy. Or rather, my body was moving very swiftly and fluidly, despite feeling rather at peace. It was a great day outside and being in the sun and feeling the wind rush by me was very soothing. Once I reached a hill that I really like in the area I could tell that my senses were somewhat expanded. I felt like I had a wider panoramic view than normal, as if my vision had been flattened somewhat horizontally, but I believe that was only an illusion caused by the fact that I was taking in a very large quantity of visual data at once (like the opposite of tunnel vision). Among the forest wall I could easily spot several complex patterns of leaves and branches, and colors were fairly saturated in a way that was almost cartoony, but not quite. There was definitely a dopaminergic filter applied to the world, but given that I am very accustomed to this mental change and can pick up on it easily.

I ended up walking down a path in the forest and found myself feeling very connected to nature. I watched bugs fly around me and animals scamper through the trees as I just walked by. The feeling of mental calmness despite the stimulation made for a very synergistic mindset at this point. I read that L-theanine may have effects on increasing serotonin as well, though it's still disputed. I'd believe it after experiencing this, but it could have just been from the GABA increasing/NMDA antagonist effects as well. Eventually though, I started to feel a bit tired. This may be due to my sickness, like I said, but I also suspect that the dual nature of L-theanine might make the stimulation more susceptible to reduction from fatigue than the average stimulant. It wasn't really an exhaustion though, just that I had gotten my fill. I headed home and basically relaxed until the effect died out. I'm not totally sure when that was, I didn't much pay attention to it after that.

This was more impressive than I had hoped. It wasn't a very powerful effect, but it wasn't negligible either. I do think though, based on some reports I've read of people getting "drunk" from higher doses, that L-theanine's sedative effect will eventually overpower and probably blunt its mild stimulant psychedelia. This is one probably best used as a compliment to truly psychoactive doses of stronger drugs, as it seems like it could ease your mindset a bit if need be or maybe just smooth out an experience a bit, while still maintaining the same level of hallucinogenic effect. I'll certainly be keeping it on my shelf.