• Lucid Dreaming - Dream Views




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    1. ccci. Meeting at a church, Visiting an in-dream dream location, Living in a mall

      by , 07-11-2021 at 07:03 PM
      11th July 2021

      ~7:30
      Fragment:

      Transitioning from the TBC era to WLK era. T is there as his paladin at one point. There's something very Roman-esque about the setting? We need to complete some gold-payment quest to continue on into the city. There's a group of randoms with us, part of our party.

      Fragment:

      In a place like L, by the pier area I think. There's a lot of commotion because of an upcoming football match. It's dark-ish, twilight-like, orange and purple hues in the sky? I want to take the subway to go somewhere, but first I got into this church. Many people are leaving an on-going service in the church but many still remain.

      Aunt G enters the church, I notice her and approach, getting her attention. She eventually recognises me and I tell her we should go somewhere together (to make up for lost time?) because I realise this place is actually quite crowded. I don't entirely feel safe, I think. Someone, an older lady but not as old as my aunt, she's putting up cordons and tells us we can't go in a certain area of the church. She had white hair, maybe tied back.

      The church is artificially lit, quite a warm light which contrasts with the twilight. Originally I wanted to move towards one of the areas that was cordoned off. We end up leaving the church and heading down a nearby subway entrance.

      (recall gap)

      We are next to a guy who's a pipe maker. I tell my aunt how many churches just can't afford new pipes, even though they'd benefit from them. The pipe maker gives us a statistic; only about five-hundred thousand out of one and a half million can afford such things. I realise and remark that it's only a third. I also remark that the distribution is going to be geographically unfair or disproportionate, too.

      (after writing these two, I got up and had thoughts about WBTB as I got back in bed)


      ~10:00
      Fragment:

      Visiting a church with H. In the dream, I had a dream where I'd visited this church and it was sort of empty. So, when we're there together, I already know the layout. During the dream, this made me vaguely think of "vision quest" dreaming and that sort of thing (no doubt related to reading Dreamgates before bed). The church has an odd layout, the rooms are laid in an inwards spiralling fashion. One of the back rooms we go through is tiled and looks a bit industrial.

      It has four big cylindrical tanks, all white. They're about twice and a half our height. I understand them to be part of some boiler system. A man, possibly the warden, is showing us around the church, some kind of introduction.

      Before this, me and H are outside. We just got out of the van. It's dark? I don't remember the grounds too well but there are tall trees and low dry-stone walls. H shows me something about a painting, which resides out here, on the external church walls. The painting is very big, mostly vertical. It's about one yard wide by four yards tall.

      The painting itself is kind of sepia in tones. It has a sketch-like look. At first I just see some eyes at the top, like part of an incomplete portrait, but as I move it around (because I'm moving it to hang it on another wall), the image changes. On some level, this makes me think of those "holo" images.

      Fragment:


      At a mall place with H. We live in a flat inside the mall, accessible via an escalator through a store, it's either a clothing or jewellery store. Some people I know from school are here, there's some interaction. Rest of recall is gone.



      Notes:
      - We went today somewhere that took us the same road that we can take when we went to see a pipe maker. This was recently, so I wonder if that dream theme was influenced by this.

      - The TBC->WLK dream theme probably came from a nostalgia of the actual WLK period and from having some interest in its classic revival. On the other hand, I have little or no interest in paying to play the game, especially since there's very little social motivation for me to do so. The last time I went on, the atmosphere was more "toxic" than I recalled, something I found hugely disappointed, making me feel like some people just never grow up. Perhaps when I played many years ago, I was just that much younger that I didn't think much of it/just ignored it or maybe it wasn't that far removed from daily life, but now it would just bother me.
      -- I still find WoW dream themes to be fairly enjoyable, since they do tend to focus on the sense of adventure, combat or exploration, which were feelings that were much more present in me when I was younger. I haven't felt a genuine sense of wonder about anything at all for many years.

      - In the area where I used to live, the mall has flats over it. Although the mall in the dream had a more "airport-shops" feel to it, the rest of the associations seemed fairly close to memory of home.
    2. Finding my cat and makeshift RTG | [10.07.2021]

      by , 07-10-2021 at 05:01 PM (Draeger's Dream Journal and Documentation)
      RTG = Radioisotope thermoelectric generator

      Finding my cat
      I am looking at some sort of website where we can apparently get a large list of benefits if we register, including ~350Ä. And apparently, they are saving cats they found alone outside by giving them away to new owners. I am afraid of that because one of my cats is roaming around outside after they ran away, but she always sticks to a certain area around my house, which means I can easily find her. But then I am not sure if she got taken away by that organization. Later, I find her in a bush and one of those people from the organization is wondering what I am doing, or maybe I just thought that they did, but I explain that this is my cat. Later, I think that it might have not been mine and that the cat just looked like mine. But I tell my mother anyway, and I ask if we should carry her home to save her or if we should use one of those portable cat cage-like things. She says we should use the latter.

      Makeshift RTG
      I am putting the last piece into my makeshift RTG: the radioactive material. It's this large pellet; it resembles ~2kg of plutonium, but in the dream, it's apparently not plutonium and I am having problems finding the name of it on the periodic table. I think it begins with W. Later, I show it to some friends on Discord, and when I return to it, the walls and ceiling of the space where the pellet is in are red hot, which is apparently according to how it's supposed to work. I feel around about 30cm above the ceiling of the little chamber in the middle, in which the pellet is sitting, and I feel the extreme heat of the chamber, even on my torso. I am also a bit worried that some of the heat I feel might be caused by radioactive particles hitting me.



      I have made a drawing of the makeshift RTG and also got the picture that the dream got inspired from:
      Drawings
      Your favourite things-dream_rtg.jpg
      Your favourite things-dream_rtg_open.jpg

      Picture of plutonium pellet
      Your favourite things-750px-plutonium-238_pellet.jpg
    3. Dad taking sister's money?

      by , 06-21-2021 at 04:42 AM
      The other night I had a dream. I was in my house's big bathroom which is almost oppiste of my Dad's bedroom (Mom sleeps elsewhere). The parents were both in the room, and they're literally counting coins (toonies, loonies, quarters, dimes and nickles). Some reason, one of our cordless phones were in the bathroom (I'm going to guess Dad left it there after talking with one of his friends). Someone calls and I answered it and then I get Mom. When Mom is talking on the phone in the bathroom, I see Dad taking all the coins and putting it in his pocket. Mom gets done on the phone and I said Dad took the money. We both go into the room and Mom says to Dad "You took (sister's money) let's hope you don't take her booze bottle as well" dream ends
      Categories
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    4. cclxxxv. Visiting MoonageDaydream for a donation

      by , 06-18-2021 at 08:35 AM
      17th June 2021

      Mostly going from end to start.

      Dream (DFLN):

      I'm in a city, I'm walking outside with MoonageDaydream, HumbleDreamer and another woman that I don't recognise or recall anymore.

      The dream ends when we are walking down a hill on a paved bit. It's cobbles and it mostly follows the hill but becomes stairs at some points where there's too much incline. Just before, I'm thinking out loud about how it reminds me of my native country, thinking that it looks to have more buildings however. I am beside the unknown woman, possibly slightly from behind and touching her shoulders, "It's funny, I don't remember getting here" and then I look at my right hand and begin counting the fingers from the back. The count seems normal at a glance but I feel self-conscious trying this RC in public. I think about M/M themes in this city but nothing manifests or changes.

      It's about near sunset and there's a sea visible from this hill. I start thinking about an airport and the name of the town, feeling dumb for not remembering and then I wake up.

      Just before this part, the four of us were crossing a road. It's a busy place and there are loads of people (or so it feels). We're somewhere in the USA supposedly and people are generally amused by my presence, seeming to think I'm British despite having no such accent. We have just come out of a store and as we cross this road with crossing island, I think about how there's Covid but nobody is wearing any face coverings. I also think to myself about how I've had my first jab, on my right art. (In reality I haven't yet)

      HumbleDreamer seems moody or perhaps overly serious for most of the walking around, but he doesn't really act that way. I am afraid that I have done something to upset him. At one point he says he got here from France and there's a segment where he's making a video for YouTube in a mostly white room, I forget what about.

      Back to the store, it's like an airport shop come to think of it. It's very generic and enclosed, at the end of a corridor. People interact with me and the group and this is the main reason I end up thinking about Covid. The person behind the till, a white middle-aged American woman, with short hair, kisses my hand or something and another woman offers a bite of a pizza slice to the group but we decline politely. Just before we get to the till, I'm talking to the unknown woman about snacks and such and how they're much cheaper here, because we saw a vending machine in the corridor leading to the shop. It's dark in the corridor except for some strong hue lights, reds and greens mostly. The drinks are like little cartons of apple juice and so on and cost about thirty cents, making me think I could buy about three or four versus the cost that I'm used to. The snacks are mostly potato stuff.

      We talk about how there's not a lot of importing around here, for some reason.

      Before the corridor and some dark halls, we are in a church yard of some kind. It's all mostly paved, gritty or gravel. There's a dry fountain in the middle, made of stone? It's MoonageDaydream's school workplace apparently. We came all the way here from wherever we came from to give her a donation, but I'd forgotten my hundred and twenty five dollars that I was to give her. I fear the group is disappointed with me but suspect MoonageDaydream is fine with it. I decide to give it to her as soon as I can.

      The church/school building itself is very grey and looks a bit like Gaudi's style, very bulbous and round shapes and some mini spires. I remark on this and comment on how it must be Spanish in origin, therefore. The outside of the building has a render made up with large smooth stones that can fit in a hand's palm. I talk about the building style with the group but I don't recall their comments.

      There was more recall but I felt too tired writing my initial notes.



      Notes:

      - When I woke up, I thought about how some of my conclusions during the dream were a bit hasty and I thought about how I could have become lucid at the end.
      -- In a way, it's unusual that I thought about how I got there, I just found myself trying to think of the trip there and the airport and finding I couldn't remember, partly attributing it to tiredness from the trip.

      - Unlike the other dream where I'd only heard MoonageDaydream, in this dream I could see her and HumbleDreamer clearly. Their details as characters seemed accurate to how I remember their profile pictures here.
    5. cclxxi. Giving dad some coins, Meeting up with an old friend and getting bitten

      by , 05-22-2021 at 03:35 PM
      19th May 2021

      Fragment (remembered this while in the car and thinking about money):

      I'm somewhere, meeting back up with dad. I'm giving him several old pound coins. I deliberately picked old ones instead of newer ones to give him and I remember ruffling through something (a cloth bag?) to get them.



      20th May 2021

      Fragment:


      I'm in a version of my old town. It's dark, night time, but no street lights or anything? I meet up with D (childhood friend), an accidental meeting. I follow him into a building, climbing some stairs that lead up to the ground floor where the entrance is. The building is the one opposite of the cafe on the main street.

      (transition)

      We're then inside his apartment, but like the building, it's not the same as it would be in waking life. There's a lot of stuff everywhere and I make some remark on how it's comforting to know that other people can also have this issue. It's mostly clothes, clean but unarranged and piled up. I forget what we talk about, but we discuss something. It's dark here too, but more like dawn than night. There's a cold ambient light.

      Then, I think I need a wee and I go somewhere in the flat. I go into this sort of secret compartment behind something and I forget all about needing a wee as I climb down a wall ladder comprised of metal loops in the wall. Then this part has a connection to the lift shaft. It's dark and goes a long way down in there. I look away? The rest of the room is some kind of cubical underhang thing on the building. There's a barred window in here at some two or three feet away. It looks much brighter on the outside, like it's daytime there. I look again into the lift shaft and the aperture is smaller than before now.

      I'd have to crawl first to fit through now and drop down. A mouse, two mice come out. They look clean but I don't trust them. One gets close and for whatever reason I still reach toward it with my hand. It gets on top of my hand and bites me. It doesn't hurt a lot but I feel worried about getting an infection. I'm angry at the mouse but quickly forget about it. I go elsewhere, not sure where, and there I eventually wash my hands in a bathroom.

      (there was a lot more to this dream but I couldn't recall much)

      Notes:
      - Before I fell asleep on night preceding the 19th fragment, I was again thinking of a general thing of Occipitalred's thoughts on dream awareness.

      - It's ironic that only just recently I told Occipitalred I couldn't remember any dreams about money but then just a day or so before I had indeed dreamed about the subject of money in some form.

      - I like to collect old and non-circulating coins, even if they are actually fairly recent. It seems odd that I would give dad the older ones rather than the newer ones, especially since in the dream there was some subtext of money being required to pay something banal.

      - The dream with the mouse is one of a few recent-ish ones where a rodent has appeared.
    6. Knife hunt

      by , 04-24-2021 at 09:52 AM (DJ of lucid goals and how it goes)
      I'm in some room with a bunk bed. My dad sits in the lower one and talks about money problem and some kind of new job (New fragment). I'm holding in a knife and fighting with Gabriel in my class. He is striking me all the time and I just block. I run away and see my surroundings, I'm in a big house with roof at least 8 meters up. I run for the exit but a girl is there with a knife. I run back and notice that she is going to throw the knife at me. I laugh at her because I know it will be easy to dodge the throw from this distance. She throws the knife and it is easy to dodge it. (new fragment). There is a ghost by the shore and we walk to it. It has armor and a bone shield on its back. I try to hit it but it has no effect. Dad comes and cracks his shoulder pad open. The armor falls off and Peter comes out from it. He is friendly and we walk away (new fragment). We come to a campfire and there is a good looking girl there which triggers lucidity. I tell all the people by the campfire that this is a dream and they nod. Details are disappearing and my vision goes dark.

      Notes: My cousins played a game where they pretend to have knives and hit each other.
    7. 18 Mar: Lucid through the mirror, walking maybe in Belgium and rural place

      by , 03-18-2021 at 02:24 PM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid FA / AP


      Taking a shower in what looks like my maternal grandparents kitchen in VFX. The shower is on an elevated platform with a very lose curtain in front of it, just by the left side of the door. I don't feel uncomfortable though and I am feeling a bit horny.
      I see the direction this dream is going and for that reason I get half lucid and decide to dry up and dress. Right in front there is another door leading to a proper WC. It has a large mirror on the wall. When I see it, I get fully lucid and I sink in it. Unlike other times, it just expands like a bubble and becomes transparent, letting me see that there are people working in an office behind it. I burst the bubble and join them. They look scared and some run away. One dude seems like he might attack me, so I manifest a bunch of money on his desk trying to distract him. Then everyone else goes crazy and I think I need to make more money to calm them down. So with some difficulty, I make it rain - there's notes falling out of thin air. Unfortunately, some just look like notes but are random pieces of paper, which again seems to enrage people. I decide to leave before they turn on me. I levitate towards upper floor and then go through a couple doors and I am outside. I feel the fresh air and find the sensation amazing. I also enjoy the view. Seems like I am in Belgium, the architecture looks familiar. I walk down a street looking for references and see a big sign saying Badesee or Badesek. Seems like an entrance to a station or a park. I almost lose lucidity in here, so I rub my hands. I am enjoying beautiful surreal things like trees with african pottery hanging from branches, a stained glass sky with beautiful sunset hues shining though it. Then I notice some weird guy kinda stalking me and I decide to fly over a wall to the other side. It's a more rural landscape on the other side and I see a huge snake in pastel yellow and green designs sliding through some wooden houses ad then turning into a girl in clothes of those colors. I find that lovely but also seems like she is a sign of caution from here on. Then I catch a glimpse in between houses, of some black guys running and I am not sure what they are running for or from, so I hide to see what's up. I hide between two very close walls of a couple ruined houses and I peek over a wall to see if they came my way. They didn't, they disappeared inside some other house or down the road. Then I see a man guiding a bunch of scared black women and children into a barn and other people hiding wherever they can in these old rural houses and barns. I don't know what they are hiding from but I am absolutely sure they will be found very easily when whomever is looking for them swipes the area. I want to help them so I plan to hover the place and shoot fire or whatever to their attackers, but I am distracted by my dog Lady who comes out of nowhere and joins me in that tiny space between walls where I am at. I hug her and all of a sudden I am in my farm and notice that all my dogs are outside the fence. Some idiot girl was passing by and when my mom arrived in her car, the girl leaned against the fence to get out of the road and she damaged the fence, and the dogs found a way to pass under it. Pissed of, I ask her to help me fix it while trying to bring my dogs inside.
    8. Welcoming death. Winning money.

      by , 03-13-2021 at 06:53 PM (DJ of lucid goals and how it goes)
      Doomsday is coming and we are about to rescue earth from a meteor by launching a rocket and explode the threat. We ready the rocket and launch, the rocket is going up but suddenly it turns of to the left and explodes on the surface. We go in a car and try to drive away from the location the meteor is going to crash. We drive by a lake as a big missile i penetrating the water and starts to spread a relatively slow explosion. I'm driving and see it closing in. I look back and scream "finally, I welcome you death". I feel a bit ashamed because my dad is sitting next to me. The fire closes in and eats me and I feel my body evaporating. We wait for the car to explode and suddenly it does.

      Notes: We watched a movie some weeks ago with very similar action.

      I'm in a big school and we have just played some kind of sport in the gym. I forgot my shoes and go back again. Gabriel is with me and we keep on walking. There is a door that is locked. Gabriel opens it with his key but I think to myself that it would be better for me to open the door so that he does not need to waste his keys. Mr Beast comes and congratulates me that I won 2 million kr. I am very happy and we are about to hug but then I think about corona and we stop halfway. I instead go on my knees and hug his very long legs. I ask him what he would have done if he got this money when he was in my age. He says: "I would probably have bought a bunch of CD-discs just so that I could make a tower or something as stupid." We laugh together.

      Notes: Our conversation was in swedish.
      Categories
      non-lucid
    9. Fragments, The Death of Ninjas Brother, Track Meet

      by , 12-08-2020 at 09:43 PM (Oneironautic Escapades)
      12/8/20

      Walking around outside a Walmart I think, I keep finding folded up money on the ground. Only ones and fives but they are all folded different ways. Some of them aren't even full bills

      Hanging out with Ninja and a couple of his friends in a room. They are being kind but one of them is still kind of shady so I keep an eye on him. At one point he comes back from upstairs and tells me my dad gave him this pen and hands it to me. I doubt him because the pen is important to me and there is no way my dad gave it to him. I call him out for it and ninja is embarrassed his friend is being shady.

      Ninjas brother now is being really nice and shows me a bunch of gifts he got for me and my family. They are like Valentine's gift baskets with chocolate and various things in them. It now becomes combined with minecraft somehow and he tells me when I activate a certain point it will build a house for me on top of where we are. I am flabbergasted and very grateful I gather this thing was very important and it's very kind of him to spend so much money on me and my family. Ninja is also surprised.

      The friend is gone and it's just him and his brother now they are both drinking and rather drunk. Ninja warns me we need to look out for his brother cause he is somewhat suicidal. We're upstairs and his brother is being sloppy drunk and they are goofing around each other. The brother wants to dive down the stairs cause he thinks it will be funny. We both say no and tell him not to cause it is dangerous and he could seriously hurt himself. We get him to stop but he's still being sloppy drunk.
      We are outside now and the brother is laying down next to ninja, they are laughing about something so we stop laying attention to him for just a minute. He picks up a small firecracker looking object and puts it on his forehead. He says goodbye to us and lights the fuse. It is a thermite flare and immediately burns bright and downward with great heat and turns his head to ash. We are both taken aback and cannot believe this just happened. Ninja is in disbelief and quite emotional. I try to comfort him but am still in shock about the occurrence.

      I use the little money I have left to buy a tracksuit. Like under armour tops and bottoms. It is cold out so I have a hat and a woven looking balaklava on. I am lining up with tons of other students for a track meet. I am still pretty upset about my friend but feel kind of numb about it, my parents keep trying to comfort me but I act apathetic. Mom tells me she is sorry I had to spend my money on a running outfit. I shrug. We are now lining up with other students who are stretching and getting ready for the meet. I feel like this is my first time running but still feel very capable to perform well. I acknowledge I'm not in the best shape and may not have the endurance but still feel like I may place. I see other people running and competing, I am unsure what event I will be in. I tell someone I've never been in track before (not true IWL) I see a couple kids practicing their baton pass. I decide there's no way I'm running more than 400m without dying. I wake up while talking to my dad who somehow jumped over a chair.
    10. cxxxviii.

      by , 08-13-2020 at 01:01 AM
      27th June 2020

      Fragment:

      Long dream but details faded. Remember being in the mountains, by myself. It was a sort of twilight hour. I remember looking under what was a false boulder and there was money under there, a few thousand euros and pounds. There was a message saying I was to take as much as I wanted.

      I stuffed it all in my shorts pockets.

      Then I remember thinking about going back home or something, I felt like I was lost in an unknown country. I arrived at a hotel place of some sorts and H was there in the role of a generic servant or something.

      (Transition/recall gap.)

      In some kind of big store. There's only a few people around, it's day time and not much artificial lighting is needed in here as it seems to be adequately lit naturally. Then this group of guys comes in and they are a bit stocky, not fat though. They are going to rob a vault at the store. They do so and there isn't much fuss about it, apart from the odd scream from a woman. I hear them talking or something and they managed to steal 6.2 billion.

      I think about how much money that is, and how it looks so small physically, as they only carried a few sacks of notes between them. I remember maybe being in the car with them and talking about their robbed loot.



      Notes:

      - Although I remember having this dream since it wasn't that long ago, none of the visual recall seems to be coming back really, so in that sense I can't consider it very memorable at this time.
      - I remember there was a fair bit of dialogue in this dream, but this is typically amongst my most easily lost details.
    11. Monday, June 22

      by , 06-26-2020 at 06:09 AM
      I think I am in New York City. I am outside of a somewhat smaller building that has at least two climbing walls attached to the exterior. There is a line (I think mostly of kids) for each. There are a few police officers that seem to be letting people in. I think I donít really need to climb one, but end up doing so. I think everyone is trying for speed and I know that I could beat them due to my age and experience, so I just climb it regularly. I think I only have socks on. I also think thereís something about not thinking Iím on a rope, but then discovering Iím on an auto belay. Now, I am walking around the corner to deposit a check (or make a withdrawal or something similar). The building has older columns and a white stone staircase. I pass by a few sketchy people, then enter into a tiny room. Thereís one other in here, a girl who seems to be friendly with the female bank teller. I have to sort of make my presence known. I now give her the slip and think I get it and a receipt back. I also think I did something wrong, since itís been so long since Iíve done something like this, and have to go back.
      Categories
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    12. Sunday, June 21

      by , 06-24-2020 at 04:56 AM
      Iím on a walk. I get to the edge of a driveway, where a Black man has met and is talking to a white, male police officer. I get the impression he has come down here so the officer wonít go on his property. Now, another Black man comes out and does the same thing. The officer leaves amicably and then the first man turns to me and starts handing me some cash, a few crisp bills. He has short hair and seems very genuine. I think itís a few 20s and I donít even know what itís for, so I say no, I canít take it. The second man, with shoulder length dreads and baggier clothes, tries doing the same, and I think I give in. I think at the beginning of this, I put on headphones to listen to a Tedeschi Trucks Band show (the song was ĎLaugh About Ití into a drum segment). The weather was cooler - I had pants and a long sleeve. I was walking on the right side of the roads [sic] as two girls were coming towards me. I noticed a car coming from behind them and from behind me as I had to go around them to the left, thinking it would leave very little room for the cars.




      Iím walking into a store with Sage. I think itís a reptile or animal store. On the left, I notice three tanks on stands thatíve been covered with a black film or cover. Two older ladies working here say hi and then I think profile or customer service me. This irritates me as we walk into a larger back room, Sage way ahead of me.




      Iím on a walk and have ended up on what looks like a sandy hillside that overlooks a beach and the ocean? It is sunset and the thick and vivid layers of deep reds and oranges are absolutely beautiful. There is some kind of electronic trance music playing and it makes for a very ethereal moment. Iím now down on the beach and there are a bunch of people dancing to the music. The sunset is the background, but there are also strobe lights. I think I start dancing.





      Granny has died, but I feel comforted knowing that she had the opportunity to say bye to everyone and also that she came to me in a dream (*this seemed very real, and I was recalling pretty much exactly our visit with her yesterday).
    13. Sunday, June 7

      by , 06-13-2020 at 06:07 AM
      I am ascending some type of rock formation. It seems to be a tall (hundreds of feet?) spire of sedimentary rock. It is probably only ten feet or so wide. It definitely feels very vertical, yet there is a dirt path that leads up the thing. I hear voices nearing a pause. A group of two or so is coming down. The first is a paunchy older middle aged white man with shorts, maroon t-shirt, a mustache, and what looks like a safari hat. He is nonchalantly sliding down on his ass, bracing with hands and feet. He stops and begins telling us (I think there are about two others with me) a story. I think he is Doc Watson. Heís slightly below me, and I rest my left arm on a rocky protrusion jutting out from under some sand. Some displaced sand begins to fall off, taking more and more with it, falling down close to his face. I tell him to watch out, telling him it was my mistake for doing that. Now, enough sand has fallen away that the spot I needed to continue on has vanished. There is a large cavity now, encased by only stone, beyond which I see the ground vertiginously and frighteningly far below. It seems that the only routes left are to climb this cave roof (brave and perilous) or to mantle this stone above me. I test the holds, a slight edge, and a slight block, and they do not give me much confidence. I keep gripping and re-gripping until my hands sweat, causing me to slightly panic. I am acutely aware of the fact that if I fall I will die and so the only way to survive this is to not fall at any cost. There is now a girl, slightly younger than me and wearing black leggings and a grey shirt, on the rock slightly above me. She might have a harness on? Her underwear, a thin, black thong with thicker straps, is sticking up above the leggings, and I grab onto them like a hold. She has me go first, probably aware that this is going to expose her. Finally, we have summited this spire. The top of it is flat and maybe 20 or so feet across. There are a few artificial climbing walls. I think weíre about to start on them, but her grandma is here now and putting some cash in my left pocket for a gift card. I already have a similar amount of cash in there and wonder about it. There is a very slabby wall, a vertical one with a lot of crimps, and one with large, circular, inflated holds that must be for grip strength. They all seem easy and the walls are just barely taller than bouldering height. Looking past them, there seems to be no background, just an empty space/void. I now realize and dread that I have to go back down. I think of any other way, like getting picked up by a helicopter.




      I am outside somewhere by or on a two lane asphalt highway. Suddenly the earth shakes - an earthquake, I realize. Itís steady in intensity, not enough to knock us off our feet, but enough to seemingly keep us magnetized down. It ruptures the highway in a fairly clean split.
    14. cviii.

      by , 04-02-2020 at 12:59 PM
      A few dreams though I only remember bits of them.



      Dream Fragment:

      I remember being in a somewhat dark room and having a discussion with some people about age, in the dream I was around an age when my hair would start greying, starting at the front and just lightly. Mom was there and she commented on how it was just like her dad's hair. I remembered a photo of him that mom has kept in her home office for years since his passing. Then I remember seeing a mirror and seeing myself on it. I looked older but unimaginatively so, but my hair did look a lot like his, except for the fact that his would have curled slightly.

      Dream Fragment:

      Perhaps from another segment of the previous dream, but I remember something about trains and a kind of alien (Mars-like?) desert. Day time, clear sky. There were some really high-tech-looking trains and one such train went up a hill into a rounded futuristic building. I was with a group of people (friends?) and we were walking in the opposite direction, though I kept looking. The engine carriage separated and sort of shot off on its own along the rails and quickly hit an end-track bit, bouncing back and then hitting the rest of the carriages. It was some type of freight train, and its ornamental features matched that of the building, featuring a warm orange.

      Dream Fragment:

      Something about me or captain Picard, in a large office room of some kind. Other people both friendly and not-so-friendly were there, and we were there to ask for money I think. Starting at 30,000 but then the guy didn't want to give us any more, so then there was this little scene where Picard walked closer to him slowly and then started punching him very fast until the guy, who was also kind of old, fell down on a spiral staircase. He didn't go all the way down or anything, just a couple of steps on his back, because the degree between each step was very small (less than half foot?).

      The staircase steps were marble and the handrail looked fancy, but I don't remember it in detail. I remember a woman speaking after this had happened and she said "well, now you have 25,000, since you have to take away 5,000 just for that". But then before the dream ended there was something about a million, I don't remember.




      Notes:
      - Recently in waking life I'd been thinking about how I don't really ever remember seeing mirrors in my dreams, so I think that's partly what brought on one's appearance in the first fragment.
      - Typically, despite being the result of a previous conscious thought during wakefulness, I did not realise the connection between the two things in the dream. This is happening quite a bit lately, which is frustrating at times. But it may just be that my recall is also decent lately, so maybe I just think I notice it happening more but it may just always happen this frequently and I haven't realised before.
      - Featuring myself as being older may also come as the result of conscious thought from waking life, as I often question why I'm always my current age in dreams. Although in the dream, until the hair thing was made obvious by the mirror, I did just feel like my current age anyway.
      - In the train dream, the group that was with me was a bit shocked with the collision, but I had been expecting it. The dream had a slight Borderlands feel to it.
      - There was a fourth dream fragment also involving trains but in a completely different context. I can't put the visuals into words now.
      - The dream with Picard may have just been some continuation of the first fragment. I'm really not sure anymore if these dreams were directly linked or not, because I don't remember any transitions and I had several awakenings this morning.
    15. Tuesday, December 31

      by , 01-03-2020 at 07:58 PM
      I am in the Jewelry department at work. I think I was just passing through, but a customer stopped me as if I worked there. Itís an Indian? couple with two kids. The man hands me two 100 dollar bills to first make a payment. Upon checking them, the first looks like a legitimate, newer 100 and the second looks different and questionable. Iím really not sure about it, so I call for Laynie on the radio, saying ĎLaynie, can you come to the jewelry department, by the down escalator?í I think that might sound stupid to some, but Iím just trying to be specific. The more I look at it, the more I think the second one is fake. Everything looks fine and thereís even a good watermark, but it looks like itís been unevenly cut out from a sheet. I put them in my pocket for now, hoping they might think Iíve done the payment over on this far side of the counter. I go back over and now they want to see items in a spinning case. I see thereís already a key in the lock, and think that it should not have been left there. The items are not jewelry, but earbuds and things like that. I can nearly show them one thing before they are wanting to see another. Iím trying to show them what they want and keep everything else locked up and itís getting annoying. I see Laynie on the far side of the counter, in a grey shirt and walking away. Assuming she didnít see me, I call out for her. The bills feel wet? and folded up in my pocket; I take them out to show her. I discover there is no texture on the number and it feels like the texture was added poorly to the background areas. Itís also very worn as if they added that to disguise the faux texture. She sees the uneven edges and agrees that itís fake. I think it weird that only one is fake and also genuinely donít think he looks like the type. Iím thinking that if he asks Iíll have to tell him that I have to keep it; he never does ask, though. I see an employee dealing with a lady asking questions. The employee doesnít know when we close and the lady seems irritated. I tell her 9 oíclock.
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