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Dream - Lucid

Something to do with packaging out donuts. When they were all packaged (there were quite a few boxes), I was looking at them, and there were some glazed and chocolate iced french cruellers, which those aren't supposed to be chocolate iced, only glazed. They also looked really wilted and small. I remember seeing one that was small and had just a little chocolate icing on it.

Then, I was designing this roller coaster with my dad in the garage. We were picking out different kinds of track. I remember the train on it also looked very sleek, silver and thin with only one person being able to fit in each car. I was thinking about the fact that we had a roller coaster in our garage. We must be rich. The roller coaster was starting and I got in the front car.

~

I was with Dallas at the house I grew up in. We lived there. It was nighttime. His mom called. She was actually this guy I dated in the 8th's grade mom IWL, but she was Dallas's mom in the dream. I didn't really want to talk to her. She was asking Dallas if we had any mayo or mustard that we could let her borrow for something she was making. I thought that maybe we did. He put the phone down for a bit. I then went to check the fridge. We had a little bit of mayo, maybe half of a jar. I didn't see any mustard. I guess I was going to have to talk to her after all. I went to go pick up the phone to tell her. It was sitting on the counter, but was a spoon instead of a phone? I started to speak.
"Hello?" I said.
She said hello or hey or something.
"We have less than half a jar of mayo and no mustard. I'm sorry, I thought we had some! I guess we used it all!"
She said something else, like that's ok or something. We hung up.

We then, for some reason, were standing at the open front door. Before we could shut it, a blonde little boy, a toddler, ran out. He was running fucking fast, too! Dallas and I went after him. I was running as hard as I possibly could and he was just booking it. I was nowhere near him. He started to go around the house next door. I saw a little alcove with bushes next to the house with a path/shortcut leading to the other side of the house. I could cut him off! I started to run down the path. I was very close to the end, and I saw the little boy stop. I was about to get to the end and get him when this big, tall guy I work with, TJ, stepped in front of me and picked me up. He was talking to me I think, but I don't remember what he was saying. The way his hand was positioned was jabbing into one of my left ribs. It hurt! I tried to get him to move his hand, and I did for a second, but he moved it back, as if he was purposefully pressing on my rib. It really hurt!

~

I dreamed something about Kohl's, though I can't quite recall the details.

~

I was at my grandma's house, though it didn't look like it at all. I was in the guest room getting ready for the day. I was putting on my bra and underwear. My hair was also pulled back. I had a q-tip that I was sticking in my nose? I guess my nose was a little runny or something (still doesn't make sense but whatever). I had to go out into the living room for something. I walked out and saw the back of my grandma's head. She was sitting on the couch watching TV with some coffee in hand. She had on a hat as well. She turned around and said good morning to me. I then looked to my right and saw two little blonde toddlers, a boy and a girl, standing there looking at me. I wasn't sure if I should be out in my underwear, but at least I wasn't naked. I also felt silly with the q-tip, which I had left sticking out of my nose. I pulled it out.

I was then going to put these pastries, an elephant ear and a pecan crispy, on this table that had lots of pecan pastries on it. It had some white and yellow iced donuts as well. As I was looking at them, I was "remembering" what my grandma had said about how she gave birth to donuts before she gave birth to babies (like months before, very early on in the pregnancy). Apparently, this was normal. I was also "remembering" that Sarah, a girl I worked with at Kohl's, had also done that; I was "remembering" her working with me at the bakery too. I was staring at the donuts wondering how the hell your body could make donuts. What kind would they be?

I then figured I needed to put the elephant ear and the crispy into a plastic bag so they didn't go stale. I went and got one and put them in. My grandma was then telling me about how she was sorry she didn't have any plastic tupperware containers because they were all at the old house (which they moved out of 8 years ago IWL). Something about how some doctor lived there temporarily.

My mom was then there, and she asked me if grandma had told me about the donuts. I told her yes.

Dream - Lucid

Lindsay M., a lady who frequented the coffee shop I used to work at IWL, was telling me about love. She talked about how she didn't just love in a romantic sense. She also said she used to hate love.

~

I was working in the bakery, but it was different, more spacious. I think I was there early in the morning. This guy who recently got promoted IWL, Jo, was there with me. He was suspicious of me. He said
"I know you're smart, but there's something off about you..."
I didn't feel welcome.

There was more to this one, but I can't remember.

~

I was at my grandparents' old house with Dallas, my grandma, and my grandpa. We were all sitting in the living room talking. My grandpa was sitting in a chair in front of the fireplace. I was glad Dallas was able to meet both my grandparents. I then remembered that my grandpa was dead, and I saw that his head started to look kind of see through, like he was a hologram or a ghost. I figured my grandma was somehow keeping him so alive in her memory that he was appearing here. Hard to explain.

He was then gone. Grandma then said she needed to go to bed before she noticed that he was gone. I remember seeing her laying in bed. I then was out in the living room again. I saw, sitting on a small table, a shirt of my grandpa's that he wore all the time. It was just a t-shirt folded once longways. I didn't touch it. I thought to myself that the smell of my grandpa was probably almost gone from it by now.

I then started to channel the spirit of my grandpa. I asked him about my grandma's sadness. He said
"Sadness is disillusion."
His voice was strong and confident, and sounded much younger that he was when he died. I asked him more questions about sadness, and about how to make grandma feel better. He actually gave me some very insightful answers, but, of course, I can't remember them.

~

I was working at Kohl's, though it looked different. I looked outside and saw that there were some weird looking, low dark clouds moving around in the sky. It looked like we may get a tornado. So logically, I went outside. Others were there with me as well. This big gust of wind picked up and blew this white powder all over us. I saw others covered in it, and then, saw myself in third person. I also was covered in it. We were then inside and looked at the weather channel on a TV. There was a map of the United States with some dark storm cloud areas over our part of the country, some with lightning bolts in them, and then out west there were some more dark clouds as well. There was a man on the screen talking about the weather. There were no tornado warnings or anything. Odd.

I was then walking around the store when I remembered I was supposed to be at my grandpa's funeral! I kept checking my analog watch, which was saying it was around 4 something, and the time was way earlier on it than the actual time, which was about 7pm. My watch had slowed down. Great. Ugh. I frantically talked to David, a supervisor, about having to leave early. I don't remember what he said, but I think he gave me the go-ahead to leave.

I then was getting ready for the funeral. I was then thinking that I had already been to the funeral, but I had actually already been to the memorial. I was at the funeral home and saw that not everyone was seated yet. I was actually early, and I thought I had missed it all.

~

I was at work at the bakery once again. The lighting was dark for some reason. I was working with Nicky. She was working on decorating some things. There were also these Japanese themed cakes laying about, a bunch being on a high shelf. One of the cakes was sitting on the front counter. Nicky told me to watch it, because it would change. I didn't see it physically change, but I saw that it was a slightly different shape than it was a second ago. Interesting. I asked Nicky about all the Japanese-themed cakes, something about if they were the new theme right now. She said they were.

Then we were talking about cleaning. Nicky was telling me we had to get everything cleaned up perfectly, or the people coming to do the "medical inspection" wouldn't do it. Apparently, this "medical inspection" was a big deal, and they were going to come the next day, so we had to make the place look perfect. I thought about how difficult that would be since we kept getting customers.

Then, this couple came up to the counter, a guy in his 20's and a girl of the same age. They were picking out this cream cheese iced coffee cake square when the girl suddenly shot back and was on the floor some feet away. The guy was looking at her. I could have sworn I heard her saying
"Why did you punch me?? Why did you do that?"
but he hadn't laid a hand on her. I saw the whole thing. She did it to herself. I then started to think, for some reason, that I had imagined that she was yelling that at him. It was like I had tuned out and replaced the reality of what happened, which I have no idea what it was, with what was going on in my head.

A girl I used to work with at the coffee shop, Leslie, then came up to the counter with some other people. She came behind the counter to get what she wanted. She got these small brownie/cake squares and put some icing on them. She was in a hurry and was working/talking quickly.

Then, on the other side of the counter, another lady came up wanting 17 of the small cake squares. She wanted all chocolate and no vanilla. There weren't 17 chocolates in the case, so I had to go grab some more. There was a pan of them that I had decorated. The each had a small colored flower with small green leaves coming off either side.The first ones looked pretty good, but I had started to rush towards the middle of the job, and the leaves were long and janky-looking. I think Nicky and I gave her a couple of those. I don't quite recall how that one ended up.

Nicky then took a look at my decoration mess and said it looked good. What? The first ones, maybe, but the last ones? No way. They looked horrible. I saw Nicky carrying them off and the leaves looked like they were sticking up past the flowers. Ugly.

I then was opening wooden drawers on the decorators' side, and came across unsliced, unbagged loaves of bread. Bread drawers. Interesting. I then started to think about how the decorators must have gotten new storage back there because all these drawers and such looked new.

~

I was swimming in the ocean. There were other people there, but only a few in the ocean. I saw an area in the waves that looked like it had a strong undertow. I swam too close to it and got sucked under. I struggled to get back up, but I was being held underwater. I was still pretty close to the surface, but it was just out of hand's reach. I accepted that I was probably going to drown and tried to let myself ride the panic.

I then had an FA, though I remember nothing about it.

~

I was working at JC Penny's for some reason. I stated that I was going to take a break, though I had no idea what their break policy was, if I got a 10 or 15 minute break or whatever. I started walking around the back trying to find the entrance to the break room. I noticed I was wearing a maxi skirt. I also needed to use the restroom. I saw the entrance to the restroom from the back. Two girls were walking down the hallway to get there. I saw something about a family restroom.

I then was all the way in the back again, and saw these computers along the wall where you could apply for a job at Penny's. I only saw 2 initially, but noticed there were 4-5 total. They looked like arcade games kind of, and were quite big. I then looked down at my clothes and noticed that I was wearing the apron I wear at the bakery that has the name of the bakery on it. Hmm...did Penny's have a bakery?

~

I went to use the bathroom in our apartment. When I got to the toilet, two big pieces of crap gurgled out of the drain, as if they hadn't flushed all the way. Must have been Dallas. I flushed it, and noticed as they swirled around the bowl that both pieces of crap were much bigger than they looked.

~

I've been noticing lately that many details of these dreams are evading me, but I am remembering substantially more dreams per night. I also could have sworn I had an FA at some point during the night, but I can't remember it now.

Dream - Lucid

I was waking up in my bedroom in the middle of the night. I saw that next to me there was no nightstand, and another bed close by. Definitely a dream; I have a nightstand. I got up out of bed and went to go try to phase through a long floor-to-ceiling window. Outside, I could see that it was actually a cloudy morning, not nighttime; I saw little slivers of light. I tried to go through the window, but instead of me going through it, it felt solid, and rose up out of its fixture and went outside with me. It looked kind of like a garage door would look like as it was opening. Wow, I bet this looked silly to my husband, who was in bed still.

Speaking of my husband, I could faintly hear his snoring coming from waking life, and woke up.

~

I went back to sleep, and was again aware that I was dreaming. I got up out of bed and went to try phasing again. I approached a wall. This time, I focused on simply phasing through. I don't know how else to put it, but really, that's all I had to do was think that "This wall isn't solid", basically. It worked, and I emerged in what looked like an alleyway at first with lots of dressers and chests of drawers of all different types and wood colors. They looked old. The wall in this alley was a soft olive green color with a black border on the top. Instead of an alleyway though, it started to feel more like a big room. I approached a dresser, and really started to focus on my surroundings, taking in the color and vowing to remember it. The dresser I approached had something attached to it that had lots of small drawers and doors, kind of like a jewelry box. I started to open some up to see what was inside. I wasn't finding anything. Some of the drawers and doors were to high for me to reach, so I decided to try to make myself taller. I thought to myself I would be taller, and I started to rise. It almost felt like I was levitating, not growing, but nonetheless, it worked! I opened a small door and saw what looked like a small shadow box with some figurines in it. I remember a miniature white teddy bear and some furniture, but nothing else.

Again, I started to hear my husband's snores, and I woke up.

~

The snores got so bad that I had to move to the other room to sleep more, so that's what I did.

I then was dreaming of something that had to do with these big dogs I had. It's really hard to explain because it seems very abstract and jumbled in my mind. I feel like the dog care taking was kind of video game-esque. I had to go get something for the dogs. I went to Kohl's to get it. I was going up to some registers that don't exist IWL. I didn't recognize any of the employees there. I wondered where David was; he's normally up there all the time. I then approached a desk, I suppose it was the service desk, but it was round and in the middle of the store. Two boys were at it, one that had curly hair. They said whatever I was doing would take 15 minutes. Alright, that's fine. I waited. I do not remember what I got or if I even got it.

At one point, I remember one of the dogs loving me a lot for something I did.

~

I was at my brother's wedding reception. Something about maybe Dallas and I's wedding too? It was in this place that had lots of pathways and slopes, kind of like a hiking trail. I remember seeing my brother and his fiance' after the ceremony. I also remember thinking to myself I guess they decided to get married early instead of in December.

I talked to a lady about some food there. I was helping to serve the food. She wanted white chocolate macadamia nut cookies. I went to grab her some out of this plastic container with drawers, but then realized that there was another container of fresher cookies nearby. I went to grab one. She was trying to grab one out of the drawer container. I asked if she wanted that one or the other one. I think she took one of each, or two of the old ones. I can't quite recall. My brother's fiance' got cookies as well, the old ones.

Then, I was talking to an older lady with short, straight hair about a hair stylist. She was telling me she had expected me to leave her the name of someone that I recommended in the city I live in, and I hadn't, and if I could please do so. I wanted to tell her it wasn't my responsibility to find her a hair stylist, but whatever, I wrote down the name of a girl that I used to work with at Kohl's who does hair.

Then, something about someone Dallas used to work with at his old job. It looked like the job, which resembled apartments or a beach resort, was overlooking a beach, but the "ocean", upon further inspection, was just a really long pond that would fill when it rained. I saw where the pond ended. Dallas was shushing me when I was talking about something to this person because of someone at that job, his boss or something, could hear me.

Dream - Lucid

I walked back into Kohl's to shop for the first time since I quit. The service desk was in front of me when I walked in, unlike IWL where it is against a wall close to a corner. I don't remember who was working the desk, but it was someone I knew. David was there when I walked in. He saw me. I immediately felt like he was upset with me. In fact, I felt like everyone who saw me there felt that way. Nonetheless, David smiled at me and we talked. I said something about me quitting and how he must be mad. He didn't say he was mad, but I don't remember what he said.

Then, I was working there again, albeit doing a different job. They had me picking orders for this online ordering thing that they do there. I was surprised that they were letting me work there again. I thought about how I now had two jobs. I was walking around, trying to locate the order slips; I couldn't remember where they were. I "remembered" people always just handing them to me in the past. I walked by this big machine, and thought they may be there. I don't remember if they were or not.

I talked to the girl at the service desk. I "remembered" Cherie' telling me that they got a new customer service person.

The whole time, I kept thinking that the employees were surprised to see me back. I kept on doing my job, trying not to make too big of a deal out of it.

~

Blargh. Kohl's dream again. Also, a super early morning, so not enough sleep. Tonight and the next night should be a different story though. Here's to hoping!

Dream - Lucid

I went back into Kohl's for the first time since I quit. It was nighttime. I went over towards the customer service desk side, hoping that no managers would see me. There weren't many people there at all; I didn't see any customers. David (a supervisor) then saw me from a distance. I was fine with seeing him. He said
"Krista!" and ran up to me.
We talked for a bit. I had been noticing how different the atmosphere felt there, how it wasn't the same place I got hired at when I first started. I heard a girl's voice I didn't recognize paging on the intercom. I commented on this to David.

Then, David led me up to this big, tall black stair step ladder that was over by the service desk. He walked me up to the top of it and told me in so many words that since I quit, I had to stand up there for awhile. He then left to go do something else. I felt silly standing up there so I got down.

I feel as if I encountered David again, but I can't recall any more than this.

~

I was with Cherie' and Jeremiah sleeping in these makeshift spaces outside. It was morning, and I was just waking up in my sleeping bag. It was like we were camping. I had been sleeping in this incomplete wooden structure that Jeremiah had built; it's as if the bottom half of it was done, but it was missing a top half and a roof. The structure also appeared to be partially sunken into the ground; you could see dirt from underground pressing against the incomplete portions of the walls. There was also an orange tent next to it that was mine. I had gotten it late, however, sometime after Jeremiah had built his structure. For some reason, I hadn't slept in it in a few days, but instead, I slept in Jeremiah's structure.

I spoke with Jeremiah and Cherie' a bit. I told Jeremiah how the structure he built looked sunken into the ground; you could see dirt. I told him he was now at higher risk for snakes and pests invading his space. I then thought about how I hadn't slept in my tent in a few days, and my sleeping bag in the tent probably had spiders and stuff in it.

At some point, I looked at my sleeping bag and noticed a stripe of light brown/reddish dirt on it. I couldn't think of how it got there.

~

David was showing me some beta versions of some video games, Star Fox and some other game. The Star Fox beta was originally called "Bunny Adventure", where you played as a rabbit, probably Peppy Hare, in a Banjo-Kazooie type adventure game. A voice was narrating, as if I was watching an ad for the beta version of the game. It advertised the hero as having metal legs, which, in IWL Star Fox, they all do have metal legs. It said other things as well, but I can't remember what. I wondered if there was a full beta out there somewhere of this game since the game play in the ad showed a very complete looking game.

Then, David was playing the game and making all these things happen that weren't programmed into the game merely by thinking about them (a nod to lucid dreaming). He made this Satan-like boss appear, and
all these other dark things were happening too. It felt odd and a bit unnerving to watch him do this.

~

I know I dreamed more than this, especially in the Kohl's dream. The last dream about the beta game is very hard to explain; it had more of a feel to it than anything that was unnerving towards the end.

I haven't really been too focused on LDing these past few days, mostly just from dealing with daily life issues and focusing on work. This has also affected my recall, so it seems. When things calm down again, I'll shift my focus back.

My friends were helping me find a dress for a school dance. I found one at Kohl's and brought it home. It was a long colorful geometric dress. When I tried it on, it was too big. I said we had to go back and get a smaller size, but we never did.