nightmare

I walk to class, it is quite nice outside. In order to get there I walked through a familiar kitchen, as well as some locker rooms. When I get the, my favorite professor is there. The class room was enormous, at least holding 20,000 people or more. In front of the class was a gigantic projector screen. The professor forced us to watch the most disturbing film I have ever imagined. Gray elephants with half their face ripped off, weird looking half human half something else crawling in the screen. I didn't remember most of it because I looked away most of the time, due to it's disturbing nature. After the film was over, two girls who were sitting next to me started to hit on me. One grabbed my "package" on the way out.

__________

I am on my way walking home from somewhere, through my old neighborhood I used to live. Snow is everywhere and it is extremely dark outside. Seems like I am walking long ways.

Well to start off my Dream journal for Lucid Dreams I should start of with my first non-Lucid that I recall for that month which is June...

Dream 1
6 June 2010
Sunday

I dreamt I was in a factory's parking lot, running from someone with a women who was attractive and had long Black curly hair. Next thing I knew we were fighting a bunch of bad guy gremlins who were working for the guy who was chasing us. These gremlins are like the ones in that move "Gremlins" ( I know surprise surprise right) . Then I saw a policeman who was old and slightly overweight who was assisting us in battling the gremlins. The cop shot the second in command of the bad guys. The second in command looked like your typical gangster but with short messy hair that was brown he also Looked dirty then out of no where someone shot the cop and he was down. The beautiful women who I was fighting alongside with was starting to search for the shooter of the cop. What I also noticed was that even the second in command was crouching like the gremlins and the Gremlins acted like gangsters as well. Then the leader came out of no where, he wore a long brown trench coat. Did I forget to mention that this battle was in my garage. We then were at the factory again when the leader appeared. Though now there millions of Brainwashed human workers and billions of gremlins to fight. The leader mocked us and said we were trapped like a typical villain would. He also said we can't leave forever ,we tried to fight our way out but like he said we can't leave so we couldn't leave.

The End

Dream signs: -Women who had long black hair
-Factory
-My Garage
-Policeman
-Cell phone ( there was a cell phone some where)
- My best Friend.

June 24-25, 2010.
I had a dream that I was inside my mother's house. I thin there was a guy and a girl in the bed in my brother's room. I went to do something, and then a few minutes later he was on our living room couch moaning, I think he was with a doctor. So I went and asked the girl what happened. This is what she said:

"I was laying at his feet. (And then she said something about a broken leg, like she rolled over it) Then he had fallen off of the balcony...and his arm had fallen off."

Then I woke up.

My little brother had died for an unknown cause. He came back to life as a demon, I think. My dad, and I'm not sure if the rest of us were there, but I was there too.

I would say to my little brother, "It's okay, it's okay." while backing up and crying. (I was really scared) His face would turn a deep dark red and he'd start running toward me. My dad stopped him somehow. He then disappeared or something, because he was all around us. This guy was there to help us out I think. There was fire everywhere. He had this contraption mind control thing, it almost looked like a toy. He pressed the button and fell to the ground. His head started shrinking.

I was gasping in horror. (What the toy thing did was transform you into a cat and leave your body there, almost like Avatar, except your a cat) I knew that Tom was out to get me, so I quickly pressed the button. I then felt my head shrinking, like a swirling sensation. My image went black, but I appeared as an orange shorthaired cat, and I could feel I had a tail. I think the other guy, which was a cat, told me to do something, but I can't remember what we did. I think I then woke up.

(There is a "trigger warning" on the content of this dream.)

I am standing at the four way intersection that leads to the dead end street I grew up on. It is night time and must be spring or autumn beccause I am wearing my warm, blue zip-up sweater, jeans, and black baseball cap. The corner of the intersection I am standing appears as it did over ten years ago when one of my old neighbour's (Mrs. Jolleff) lived there, on a quarter acre of land, in a small white house surrounded by maple trees. Not long after she died her land was sold and redeveloped into a townhouse complex. Because the area looks different than it does today I immediately become lucid.

There is no one around and not much to do so I recall learning to fly and want to give it a try. I spread my arms out and bend my knees and jump into the air. At first I am afraid of being to heavy and not being able to defy gravity (problems with flying in dreams that I have had before) but remembering this is my dream I just think of myself as weightless and I am able to float about fourty feet in the air. I then leisurely glide over the houses and tree tops towards my parent's house. As I get closer I notice that the house I grew up in and some of the houses on either side seem to exist in a void of grey fog and some facades are different that they appear in waking life and indeed when I enter the fog the outside world disappears and while it is no longer visible I can sense that it is still there, though it seems far away. I cannot make the fog go away but I can make myself invisible and see through the walls of the houses with my dream control.

My partent's house is empty of people but all of the houses to the left of their's have many people living in them, all of them people I do not know as they are not the neighbours who lived there when I was a kid. The first house to the left is empty of people but by the boxes and furniture scattered around the floors I can tell that someone has just moved in. The next house is two storeys high and each level has been split into a seperate appartment. As I slowly fly towards that house I can see a blond woman looking out the window towards me talking on the phone, but I know she cannot see me as I previously made myself invisible. I plan to make no effort to control the thoughts or actions of any character I meet in the dream because I believe they are creations straight out of my subconscious and hope they might have something interesting to say and that I might learn about myself.

I fly up to the window where blond woman is talking on the phone and childishly revel in that fact that she can't see me by making faces at her. I then fly around to the back of the house and notice through a window a dark haired man and woman dressed in stylish business clothes preparing food on the second floor. I plan to eavesdrop on them next. I fly through the wall and listen in on the blond woman's conversation. She wearing jeans and a heavy light brown sweater and her hair is shoulder length. Her apartment is sparsley decorated with things that look secondhand or very simple and homey. I cannot remember what was said now but I do recall that I found her conversation terribly uninteresting and I let myself float down through the floor to where the dair haired man and woman are. Their appartment is furnished with much nicer stuff and their is a circular glass table with wine glasses and setting for two and it looks as if they are planning a romantic dinner.

The dark haired woman is wearing a white blouse, black skirt and black high heels and her hair is pulled back into a pony tail. The man seems to have disappeared into another room for a moment while the woman is washing and cutting green and red peppers by the sink. Despite the nice surroundings and stuff the woman has a miserable look on her face and seems very unhappy. I cannot read her mind to figure out why which I find very frustrating. The man reenters the kitchen from another room and he is wearing a white shirt with black buisness pants and black tie. The woman puts down her knife and turns around to embrace him but he grabs her by the wrists, spins her around and roughly pulls up her skirt and forces her to lean over the sink. After undoing his pants he starts having sex with her from behind and demands that she continue washing and cutting the peppers while in that position. She doesn't respond verbally but I can sense that she is even more upset then before and she struggles but is not strong enough to escape the man's grip. Even though I try, my dream control won't allow me to force the man to stop or let the woman escape.

I become kind of upset myself and start to dissociate, even start to think that I want the dream to end but I hear a phone ringing in another room and go towards it. The ringing stops before I get to the phone (in an office on the other side of the appartment) and I can see a red light flashing on the display to indicate that a message has been left. I pick up the phone because I want to listen to the message (hoping that this will be something important or interesting from my unconsious - and I want to forget about the rape happening in the kitchen that I cannot stop).

The phone has so many buttons and many of them have symbols that I have no idea what they mean. I am frustrated that the phone is super complicated and has so many extra buttons that seem to do nothing. The woman in the kitchen starts screaming and I drop the phone and fly as fast as I can out of there. I am very dissociated now and cannot end the dream even though I try.

The foggy void outside has gotten thicker and darker but I can see a row of SUVs in the distance, some of which of have police lights on top but the cars are empty and seem abandoned. I notice that the home to the immediate left of my parent's house has a few lights on so I fly over there to see what's going on. While I cannot end the dream or affect that thoughs and actions of characters in the dream, I can still control my actions and inanimate objects around me. I fly into the living room of the house and see a man sitting on a recliner trying to figure out his newly hooked up cable box on his large widescreen television. Or at least that is what I think he is doing until he figures it out and violent pornography appears on the screen. The man starts masturbating and I lose interest and start flying outside but before I pass the walls of the house I hear a child crying in the basement.

I go down there and the floor is covered in discarded furniture and various basement junk but I cannot see any child even though the crying has gotten louder. I notice a set of metal grates on the cement floor, half hidden underneath a dirty mattress and some boxes. I telepathically move the junk and open the grates and discover a shallow well which contains the decaying body of a little boy. The boy is obviously dead but the crying gets louder and I use my dream control to undo the decay on the body and return the boy to life. He is surprised as first but then very scared because the man who murdered him is still upstairs. He is unable to talk but communicates telepathically and asks if I will help him sneak out of the house. I pick him up and we float up through the ceiling into the front hall of the house. Several of the SUVs I saw before have entered the foggy void and are either parked infront of the house or are driving back and forth in front of the house on a small section of road that exists within the void.

A man in dark clothing is at the front door and the word SWAT is printed on the back of this jacket. I tell the little boy that he is probably going to storm the house and arrest the man who murdered him. Instead the SWAT man knocks on the door and waits patiently for someone to answer. Because I am inpatient I use telekinesis to both swing the front door open and grab the man watching porn and force him to the front hall. I make myself (but not the little boy) visible and rat out the man for the murder. The SWAT man looks confused and says that he is there to arrest the other man for pirating cable signals with illegal cable hookups.

I use my dream control to project everything I have seen into the mind of the SWAT man and tell him that this is my dream and I want him to do something about the crimes taking place. The SWAT man responds: "There are no crimes taking place because this is only a dream." I do not know how to respond to that at first but realize that I have finally met a figure from my subconscious that might be able to give me some answers, so I then ask him: "Why do images like these appear in my dreams? What am I supposed to learn from them?" SWAT man responds: "You cannot learn on the subconscious level that which you have not learned on the conscious level."

I ask him to clairfy but the dream suddenly... I don't know how to describe this, um, explodes or rips apart. I am still aware that I am in a dream but have lost my control and it feels like some outside force has grabbed the foggy void and is tearing it to peices. The characters arround me are violently pulled into dark holes and tears that have suddenly appeared and the structures and setting disintegrate and are sucked into invisible voids. Everything is pulverized and disappears and a horrible feeling of dread overcomes me and I feel like there is an army of demons standing on my chest, though I am able to end the dream and wake up before anything more freaky happens.

There was a group of wolves, they were going to kill another group of wolves. The white wolves were the evil wolves. They heard something in the distance and bounded off to rip it to shreds. I think they were angry that the brown wolves kept piling up the snow. I found bags of snow, buckets of snow that were being filled with a snow hose and dumped them in front of the wolves. The snow didn't pile up, it just melted away.

I was in a trailer that felt like an apartment building. I was hanging out with some old friends of mine who I never see anymore. A cop knocked on the door and burst through into the living room. He was really angry and dragged me outside where he did horrible things to me and then beat me up and threw me back into the house. My friends were concerned and started ranting about police brutality.

The dream slightly changed. Things in the house began to age, my old friends were replaced by new ones. Things looked dilapidated, like they were falling down.

A woman police officer stormed through the door and began poking around. "Everyone needs to get out of here," she announced, "horrible things have happened here." She lifted a rug to find lots of blood.
At that moment I felt a chill sweep over the entire place. I couldn't stand to be there anymore. I felt like horrible things would happen if I stayed.

Summer was waiting outside in a van. She said we needed to get far away. I turned back to the trailer and saw baby cat sitting there. I wanted to cry. She was my favorite cat, and I've missed her so much. I felt like she was trying to tell me to rescue her, but I was already far away.

We were trying to get to Minnesota. We were not sure where we were or what highway we were on. We decided to stop at the next exit we could find. We turned into the parking lot of a dingy looking taqueria. Inside there were several men standing behind a counter. There were no food or drinks inside, just several men in blue shirts with dirty white aprons. They glowered at us as we slowly walked towards them. They didn't want us there. I looked around and felt like this was also a bad place. The ceiling was rotting and seemed it would fall down on us at any moment. The door to what I assumed was the bathroom has black mold creeping all along the outlines of it, I wanted to turn on my heel and run, but felt safer being with Summer. We left quickly.

We got back on the highway. The trailer was next to us, baby cat was sitting in the window, looking straight at me. We passed the trailer quickly.

We stopped a place, a busy street. The wolves were back. The white ones. I needed to stop them, so I started piling logs and trash all along the street, forming a giant barrier. I piled it so high that I had to climb up it to keep piling things on top. Finally, a car came on the other side, angry. Several trucks came and within seconds had all the logs in the backs of their trucks and were hauling them away. The path was clear and the wolves were standing there, facing me. End.

30.12.2009

In Da Club (WILD)

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID

I had a great many lucids in an afternoon nap today. Too much of a good thing, I think- I can't remember them in very great detail.

I had a FA in bed in my old house. I was so drowsy I didn't notice where I was right away. I tried to DEILD, thinking I had woken up for real. I fancied a party, as I was looking forward to new year's eve, so I imagined myself in a nightclub. An absolutely awesome song was playing. It was completely made up by my mind, I'd never heard it before. It was of the same hip-hop/pop genre they play in a lot of clubs (specifically my ususal one). I'm not really a huge fan of that type of music, being more of a rocker myself, but to me it sounds like partyin'. The song went on for about three minutes, and even had a chorus! I danced a path around the club looking for someone I knew, but no luck. The stability started to go a bit, so I grabbed onto a metal pole to "feel my way back in".

Gradually, I was back in the bed like before, but I could still feel the pole in my hand. I was gripping it quite tightly. (yes ha ha.) I was however, still dreaming that I was awake. Since it felt like I still had the pole in my hand as I went to sit up, I reasoned that it must be a FA. I felt some pressure on my leg and looked down. There was a dude with blonde hair and glasses sitting there. No sooner had I seen him than he shot up towards me. His head turned into that of a tiger and he snarled viciously. He was a centimetre from my face- it was as vivid as real life. I knew it was a dream but it still shocked me awake.

24.12.2009

Bus Ride (DILD)

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID

A major dream sign I've noted (can't believe I didn't see it before) is buses. No exaggeration, since starting this DJ, I've had about 10 dreams involving buses. That's like 12%. I'll be keeping an eye out for them in future.

I've been having decent success with DILD's the last few days. I think of it as a lazy approach. I wake up in the morning, then just go back to sleep as if it were a WBTB, but fall asleep normally. I tend to become lucid naturally near the start of a dream.

FA in my old caravan. It was night time, and very dark. There were no lights on outside. My brother Andrew was asleep in a bed across the room. I saw a shape move on the other side of the door. (The door is made of frosted glass) A huge brown dog phased through and was now in the room with us. I nearly shat a brick. I'm not afraid of dogs at all in real life, but there was something terrifying about this enormous one which had found me in the middle of the night. I became semi lucid as it advanced on me. I was sitting up in bed and made up my mind not to run away from it. I leaned down so my face was level with the dog's and stared it out. It got closer and closer and I kept glaring at it. Soon our noses were nearly touching, and the dog's face was all I could see. Then it vanished.



I woke up Andrew, who had slept through the dog's intrusion. I told him that this was a dream, but he seemed reluctant to accept it. I looked at my hand and saw way too many fingers. I showed it to Andrew and asked him what he could see- but he didn't give me a solid answer. I considered the possibility of this being a shared dream since it really seemed like him, but I doubt it was.

I looked out the caravan window to my left. There was a double decker, open-topped bus parked outside. I closed my eyes and tried to teleport on board. At first, I was pretty sure it hadn't worked, but when I opened my eyes, I was on the upper level, at the front. Andrew was with me. The bus started moving, driven by Idon'tknowwho. I kept looking at my deformed hand and trying to get Andrew to comment on it, but to no avail. We held on to the railing at the front of the bus as it went far too fast over bumps and round corners- it was like a roller coaster.

abridged
I am a dark African sitting in a grass hut on a swamp somewhere on the dream plane. I have a necklaces of animal bones around my neck, and feathers coming out of my head. I have thick dreadlocks.

There are all kinds of voodoo shit hanging about.

Raven enters with MoSh, Tigress and Loaf. MoSh is half snake, but no one seems to notice. Loaf is half vampire, half werewolf. Tigress is a werewolf. Raven is Queen of Night.

"We have come to seek the guidance of the Night Shaman," says Raven.

"What is it you desiyah??"

"We desire the Great Red Ruby of Foresight atop the Mountain of Despair."

"Oh, no. You don' wan go dere! You goin' die. You all goin' die many many deaths."

"Just tell us how to get there."

"Me not know if you be deservin'. Are you strong? Are you wise ones? Are you... in unity? If not, you will die, die like a snake writhin' in th' sun! You must accomplish de task of Fiyah firs'! Outside dere is a large swamp tree, with a hollow arch. Walk t'rough de tree. You will find you in de Hell of Hells. Bring me de One Watah Drop in all of Hells, and you will prove to me dat you have de strength it gon' take. NOW GO!"

They eye me suspiciously, but turn and leave. I cast enchantments upon them of protection, energy and power to assist them in their trial.

Q appears next to me. Do you think they'll make it, Professor X?

Well, Q, it's my Danger Room. I can turn it off if they lose lucidity or get lost in pain. I am going to give you an AI orb with a portion of my power. This orb will guide you in my will, and stay with you when I am awake.

I summon a small silver orb, and put a piece of my sentience into it. I hand it to Q. Q10 appears. Q hands the orb to him.

I wake up in some remote viewer facility.

"Good job, sir. You have successfully joined the Dream Corps of the CIA Remote Viewing Project, Dreamgate."

"NO YOU BASTARDS! LET ME OUT OF HERE!"

Code BLUE CODE BLUE WE HAVE A LIVE ONE!

I run out of the room. I am in a huge underground base in a mountain. I run down a catwalk. I don't know where I am going. I have to get the fuck out of there. I feel needle in my back. I collapse to the floor.

I wake up strapped to a table in an operating room.

"You have already betrayed your friends. Oh, yes, you fool. You signed on the dotted line when you slept, you idiot. Don't remember, do you? Too bad your recall sucks."

'NO YOU'RE A LYING FUCK."

THey show me a video of me signing a document in blood in an interrogation room.

"That's not me, you asshole, that's some CGI actor or something."

SILENCE. And now, we torture you for your insolence. Release the straps.

I try to get up. I can't move.

You have been given a paralyzing anesthetic. You can't move for the next forty-five minutes. Yet, you will feel all the pain and torment as we slice you open, and examine what makes you tick.

I see in the reflection of the crazy doctor's eye, a jaguar face. I am confused.

They slice me open, and I scream. I feel no pain. They remove my guts, and play catch with my liver. I realize it must be a dream. I feel a dark fire burning inside me.

I roar, and stand up from the table.

CODE RED CODE RED CODE RED MAN YOUR BATTLE STATIONS. DREAMER IS MANIFESTING BEAST SELF.

I grab the doctor, and bite his head off, then spit it on the floor. The others back away.

WHO ELSE WANTS THEIR FUCKING DREAMS HAUNTED FOR ETERNITY?

I shoot claws at all their eyes, then fly through many floors until I get outside the mountain.

Goddamned spooks in jet packs are awaiting me.

I call out to Koomo, as the RV Templars hit me with a knock out drug. Fuck yo tranq, beeyotch! This is MY DREAM!

I begin to fall. Michael catches me. Man-bats appear out of portals, and we battle the Templars.

I soon see my friends from the first part of the dream come and join me. We kick ass.

Loaf runs through the mountain, affixing bombs to the pillars. He hands me the detonator. BOOM!

We fly back to the Moon, and rest.

19.12.2009

Ask Hell! (Non-lucid)

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID

This one was straight up-weird and very dark. Not like my normal dreams at all. I can barely remember it, but what I do remember is strange.

I was in the upstairs of my granny's old house. There were a couple of other people around, I don't know who, but they were definitely female. Somebody had just died, and I needed to talk to them. One of the people I was with said I should "Ask Hell," if I could speak to them. The way to do this was to get a tin can, fill it with water, then talk to it. I did as instructed, and looked down at the water in the can. The world around me went dark, shadowy-black. I could vaguely see what was around me, but it all looked like an old sepia photo. A demonic face appeared in the water, and it started to boil. I asked about the person I wanted to get in contact with, but my request to speak to them was denied. The face talked (in a hissing/rumbling voice) about how people in hell don't get those kind of privileges, and started laughing. For some reason I started crying. The water in the tin was nearly boiled all the way to the bottom. As it was disappearing, I asked,
"Am I going to hell when I die?" The fizzing remains of the water-faced demon shook its head. Then the scene went back to normal and the water was gone. I felt extremely relieved, I was genuinely expecting the demon to say yes.

Note: I fell asleep with very little in the way of goals tonight… MoSh had said he was going to come over to do a healing on me, although I told him I felt ok. But then a little extra positive energy never hurts anything, so I figured if he wanted to do it, we could share some positive energy, most likely with Basara involved since he usually shows up whenever someone mentions the idea of healing. Unfortunately I was not successful in entering my WILD this night.

I was in a clearing in a forest. I could see there were buildings around, it looked like a small town was hidden amongst the trees. I wondered where I was. I didn't even consider the idea I might be dreaming. I noticed that there were quite a few people around, and then I noticed they were Templars. What the fuck was I doing in a Templar base? I figured I didn't want to be there, so I went to leave. That was when I noticed there was a big guy on either side of me holding onto me tightly. Their grip was like iron, and I could not make them budge to get free. I was a prisoner of the Templars… that couldn't be good.

I heard another Templar say they were ready. One of the big guys holding me forced me to the ground so that I was lying on my stomach with my face in the dirt. I felt someone lie a long wooden pole on my back, and I was quickly bound tightly to that pole. When the large Templars moved away from me I couldn't move at all except to turn my head and look around a bit. They turned me over onto my back and ripped my clothes off… I called them a bunch of fucking perverts. I was now naked and tied to a metal pole… I could hear people around me laughing and jeering.

The Templars then stood the pole up and I realized I was bound approximately in the middle. I saw they had a fire ring in the middle of the clearing, a rather large one. It was long and fairly narrow, there was a rotisserie stand on each end of the fire circle, and a pan sitting on top of the wood that looked like it was there to catch the juices of roasting meat. It looked a lot like the picture here, except the pan was on permanent metal legs and the fire pit and pan looked long enough to accommodate a very large piece of meat… or a person…

It was about then that I realized what they might be planning to do. Since I believed that was my waking life, this resulted in a feeling of ice cold fear at the pit of my stomach… I fought against my bonds, desperate to get away now, to avoid what it seemed they had planned. The bonds were too tight… I couldn't budge them even a millimeter. And my worst fear was confirmed when they carried the pole I was on over to the fire pit and placed it where the spit of the rotisserie would go with me hanging on it, looking down into the black pan. There was a quantity of grease in the pan, which was hardened right now. I was noticing every little detail… a fly stuck in the grease and trying to get free, but it was no more able to move than I was. Templars preparing to light the fire. This couldn't really be happening. I think I might have done a reality check if I could have even moved in order to do one… I found I kept repeating the word 'no' over and over, and I was ashamed of the fear I heard in my voice.

Then I said there must be some agreement we could reach that would allow me to get out of this. A couple of them laughed. But one of them said there was. He said if I could present one of my friends to take my place, they would gladly roast up my friend instead of me and I would be free to go. One of my friends? He said yes. Any of them would do. Either Nomad or MoSh would be their first choices… but if I presented them one of the others I have shared dreams with it would be sufficient, too. Markus, Tigress, or even Loaf… someone laughed that they could have toast… just choose one and teleport them here and I would be free to go while my friend was executed in my place. I told them they had to be kidding… there was no way I would betray a friend like that… I knew perfectly well I could never live with betraying a friend in that way, so in spite of my fear I told them to go fuck themselves. The Templar said it was my choice, and told the other one to go ahead and light the fire under the pan.

I didn't really notice anything at first. Then the pan was heated and it was getting a bit uncomfortable as the heat was rising off of the pan and into my face. The heat continued to increase, an intense and dry heat that made it feel almost like I was on fire. How long could this last? Wouldn't I get heat stroke and pass out from that heat before long? They let the fire die down a bit and the heat faded to a lower but continuous agony. For some reason it seemed to be imperative that I make no sound to let them know the pain I was in, so I kept my mouth tightly closed so I would not let an involuntary cry or moan or pain escape. I saw as the grease below me melted and the fly was consumed by the heating grease, killed. Another thought I was having was that the heat would burn through the ropes that bound me to the spit… then I could get free… but they were thick and sturdy ropes that didn't seem to be suffering from the exposure at all. A Templar came over and looked at me, then he poked something on my leg with a long fork, causing a sharp and excruciating pain… somehow I knew he had just popped a heat blister… that area of my leg was now in much more pain than the rest of me, and other parts of my body felt like they were beginning to blister, I could actually see a few blisters starting to form on my breasts… When would I finally get heat stroke and pass out?!

Another short while… and several more popped blisters later… a Templar came back over. I was expecting another popped blister… but instead he had a cup, which he used to scoop some of the now sizzling grease out of the pan. He proceeded to pour the sizzling grease all over my back… where it burned unbelievably hot. The Templar poured a couple more cups of blazing hot grease on my back, laughing when I was unable to contain a cry of pain… these assholes were basting me! And even after he walked away, the grease on my back was continuing to cause an unbelievably intense agony… it seemed I would surely pass out, but somehow I didn't… even though I wished I would, prayed that I would pass out or die from heat stroke… Instead I just hung there in agony, all hope seemed lost…

"Raven!" I heard a familiar voice and forced my head to turn, although that caused heat dried skin to crack and bleed, bringing with that another wave of pain… I someone standing off to my left a ways, and a portal opened behind him. My sight was fuzzy… I wasn't sure who it was… He continued talking. "It's time for… what the FUCK?!" Apparently he had taken a look around for the first time since arriving and noticed things were not as they should be. I wanted to call out to the man for help, but my throat was too dry and cracked to speak… and all that came out was a small squeak… As I have stated, my mind was really foggy from the heat and the pain, but I heard some cursing, a demand to release me, and then a fight. I saw movement to my right and the man who had just arrived shoved one of the Templar's faces into the hot grease in the pan below me. When the Templar's face came out it was covered with blisters and the Templar was screaming in pain. I heard more fighting, some Templars screaming about something… a loud hissing sound like an angry cat or snake… and then silence.

The man from the portal returned. He took the spit I was tied to away from the flame and started untying me. Every time he touched me it was excruciating, but I did my best not to let him know that because I knew he was just trying to help. Once I was free I found I couldn't even stand on my own… my legs were about like spaghetti… The man supported me, holding on to me as gently as he could… I heard him say he would get me healed up as good as new. He could heal IWL? Wow… I wondered if there was any possible way I could get him to teach me to do that… but even if he couldn't, he had already done so much by getting me free of the Templars. He lied me down in a soft area of grass. Even as soft as it was, each blade of grass was like a steel blade cutting in to me… I once again did not let him know how much it hurt. He was trying so hard to be careful.

The man sat down near me. I could hear him playing a guitar. I could feel healing energy come from that guitar. Soothing healing energy… it felt like a soothing healing salve had been applied to my entire body, and it felt wonderful. I tried to open my eyes and see who it was that had saved me… but I was so tired. Completely worn out. But he was playing a guitar to create a healing effect. I only know two people who do that. Basara and MoSh. And I couldn't see Basara shoving a Templar's face into burning grease under any circumstances, unless he had seen what they were doing and completely snapped, so I was assuming it was MoSh… I tried to ask the man if he was MoSh… "You… MoSh?" He didn't really answer that, he just told me to rest… when I fell asleep here I would wake up and be safe in bed. Safe in bed? Was this really just a nightmare? I let myself relax and slip into sleep. I could find out for sure later if it was MoSh who had come to find me. I fell asleep and woke up.

Missed a dream sign..

After grad night I got in late and was dreaming about lots of people wearing suits. Should have picked up on the dream sign but I missed it. When I was dreaming I remember thinking to myself, "that's odd.". Lots of negative imagery in the dream also, negative feelings, situations and ideas.. Likely something to do with *her.



*note to self - highlighting dream signs in blue to help in the future

15.06.2010

When it Rains, It Pours [Nightmare] (Non-lucid)

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID

I wake up to my TV tuned to the local news channel, the weather man is giving his hourly report.

"As you can see there's a low pressure pocket right above Travis county, most likely we'll see some pretty good sized thunder storms over the next week or so. There are sever thunder storm warnings for Bastrop, Blanco, Travis, Hays, Lee and Caldwell counties." He finished.

I got out of bed and went to the back door where my father was standing. He was looking outside, he seemed concerned.

"What's up?" I asked.

"Look," he said pointing towards the sky in the direction of our front yard.

I walked past him and stepped out onto the porch, I saw not only a massive thunderstorm moving in, but what looked like a giant wall of water rushing towards us.

"Dad! What do we do?! Should I let the dogs out of their cages?! Surely they'll drown if I don't?!"

He remains quiet, all the while the huge wall of water rushes towards us.

"DAD?! DAD!!! WE HAVE TO DO SOMETHING!"

He still didn't answer. He wouldn't act. I was terrified.

I wake up in a cold sweat. The emotions in this dream were weird, I was really scared unlike in most of my dreams.

14.06.2010

Mistake [Nightmare] (Non-lucid)

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID

I'm in a dark abandoned hospital. There's dirty water on the ground and broken glass everywhere. I'm searching for a rape victim who's body was said to of been dumped there. This dream shifts a lot, one minute it's just a computer game, the next I'm in it. It switches back and forth a lot. I remember at some point pressing keys on a keyboard trying to get doors to open up, but they wouldn't work.

Anyway, I don't know how but I'm searching for my own body. I look in open vaults and bloody hallways, hospital rooms with the windows broken and rain pouring through them. Sometimes I'll walk through a door and wind up in a fully functional WalMart but I just turn around and keep searching.

I walk down another hall and see a well lit hallway ahead, once I reach it I see a vault that's partially open. Curious, I approach it and pull the huge door open. Behind it is a red battered wooden door that just screams danger, but I open it anyway. Inside is what appears to be an old freezer, there are red sacks stuck to the walls. I instantly know they are eggs and that I should leave. I worry if they hatch that the beasts inside them will be too powerful for the world outside to handle, so I take a shotgun and shoot one of the egg sacks. Bad idea. The monster awakens. It looks terrifying, it has no skin so you can see it's mussels and joints. It just floats in the air, I think it had no legs. There's a weird yellow-ish aura under it and it follows in wisps behind it when the monster moves. I notice that monster is growing in size rapidly.

It lets out a shriek and I run out into the WalMart/Grocery store. I run past the bank inside the store and see my grandmother inside, she's complaining about a new checking system. I stop to tell her to get out, but the monster lets out another shriek and I here the back wall crumble, I know he's broken through it and into the store. I run. I run through the clothing section, the monster right behind me now. He grabs people and eats them, the sound of their death is horrifying. I run past my family members, my mother shopping, my brother wandering around trying to find her. I run past them and the monster grabs them. I hear them scream and I let out a choked breath, almost tripping. I make my way towards the seafood section, I know there is a freezer back there. I find it and hide there. I know the monster can break into it, but I don't care anymore. I lay on the floor, wishing to just die.

"It's all my fault," I say choked.

I'm unable to cry, unable to move, unable to function. I hear movement outside, I can tell the demon-like being has acknowledged my pain and thinks it best to let me live; he wants me to suffer. I hear him outside, he snorts and runs away.
Fragments:

I'm watching a town get ripped apart by the monster in third person. The sky is a fiery red. I remember him ripping part the starting gates at a dog race and the dogs escaping onto the streets.

Note: I had a goal tonight of meeting up with MoSh, checking on and doing a healing spell on Asuka, who has been absent from his dreams lately. After that MoSh wanted to go view an event from a Carlos Castaneda book where Castaneda was watching don Genaro do something interesting near a waterfall… I'm not sure what, but MoSh said that to see the full extent of it I would have to look at his energy, not just his body. So we have tried to do this before and met with an epic fail, so we're going to try it again. I used my light / sound machine to meditate. I fell asleep and successfully slipped into a WILD…

*Execution*
Ok… I immediately noticed something was off… I was actually over someone's shoulder and being carried… wtf? Was this some kind of attack on MoSh's inner world? Because that was where I was supposed to be… I tried to ask the person carrying me who the fuck he was, but I found I couldn't speak… my mouth was full of a foul tasting fabric… yuck… I went to take it out of my mouth, but I found my hands were bound tightly behind my back. Ok… this was annoying. I tried to activate Witchblade to cut through my bonds… nothing happened. This was really starting to piss me off. I was going to try something else when the man carrying me slung me off of his back and stood me on my feet, which I also found were tightly bound. I looked at the jerk who had been carrying me and did a double take… it was a fucking Templar.

I tried to curse at him, momentarily forgetting my mouth was full of foul tasting cloth… apparently curious as to what I would say, the Templar removed the cloth. After a couple of spits to try to get rid of the taste, I did curse at the Templar. I told him if he didn't want a personal tour of Hell then he had better get those bonds off of me immediately. He just laughed. He said I was the one who would be going to Hell… He said he was glad I was awake for my sentence, although he was sure I would have awakened as it was being carried out. No one could sleep through that.

Ok, this guy was dense, so I would have to show him a thing or two… his armor was metal, so the first thing I thought of was to use Battery on him. Nothing happened. I repeated myself, "Battery!" Still nothing happened. The Templar laughed. He said I should know perfectly well that stuff doesn't work in waking life. I told him that this was a dream. He said the drugs must have gotten me quite confused… but I had already been convicted of crimes against humanity and sentenced to death. He said I had seemed to lose my senses when the method of my execution was announced… but he was glad to see I was fully lucid and able to experience every moment of it. I said of course I was lucid, it was a lucid dream. He said I could tell myself that all I wanted, it wouldn't change a thing. He pushed me to the side, I fell to the ground since my hands and feet were still tightly bound. I looked up and saw the Templar opening the doors of an old medieval execution device known as an iron maiden.

At first I wasn't really sure what to say… was this madman really intending to use that thing? He picked me back up by the ropes on my arms and carried me over to the device, setting me between the open doors. He laughed and said this was going to be fun. I had no thought that I could be actually killed here… I knew it was a dream… I told him if he even thought about trying to use that thing on me I would see him in the dark realm where I would have a front row seat to watch the cruelest demon I could find slowly burn the flesh from his bones. He just laughed again and started swinging the doors closed. I told him I had been leaving them alone because they hadn't been bothering me, but doing something like that would mean all bets are off. So unless he wanted to know… While I was threatening, he had continued swinging the doors slowly closed. The spikes on the doors were poking me, and pushing me back a bit into the spikes on the back of the device. He laughed when my words got cut off, then with one final hard shove, he pushed the doors completely closed.

The first reaction I had was that I couldn't believe he'd actually had the balls to do that… and of course his balls are something I would cheerfully relieve him of… That thought only had an instant in my mind before I was hit with a wave of excruciating pain, feeling each and every spike as it was rammed through my body… it was immediately the worse physical pain I have ever felt… and then to top it off, they had piped in some kind of loud screaming that sounded a bit like an enraged banshee who was also in pain. But this was a dream… why was I feeling so much physical pain in a dream? That damn screaming was too loud for me to think… and then I realized the one screaming was me… apparently an unconscious reaction to the excruciating pain… With an enormous effort of will, I forced myself to close my mouth and think… I just had to wake up. So I focused on waking up. Wake up… wake up… wake up… nothing happened. I tried to move a bit to wake myself up, but the attempt at movement only redoubled the excruciating pain I was in by shifting my position on the spikes… And still I did not wake up. Why could I not awaken? I also noticed I was no longer silent. I hadn't started screaming again, I was just emitting low groaning sounds of pain that sounded like the expression of someone in the deepest pits of despair. I could hear laughter outside… the Templar was enjoying this.

I remembered reading a couple of articles, from when I was doing some research on torture devices I could put in a dungeon for a video game I am designing, about a person shut inside an iron maiden living for as long as a couple of days. How long had I already been in there? Not long, I didn't think… this was a dream. That meant I would wake up. But how long would that take? This was a dream… that also meant I should have my powers. Why weren't they working? Maybe something was blocking them… I just needed to focus to overcome that block… As I was trying to focus, I unintentionally shifted my body again… another wave of unbelievable pain… an involuntary cry of pain and despair… a laugh from the Templar outside… broken focus. A simple ability, like telekinesis… I focused on opening the doors to the iron maiden. That would either result in my being free or in my dream body bleeding to death and me waking up. At that point either alternative was an acceptable result. Nothing happened. I was going to try to focus better when the floor literally dropped from beneath my feet. But of course I was pinned on the spikes and could not fall… instead I was hanging on the spikes now… and what I had thought was the worst possible physical pain got about ten times worse…

After hanging there with my mind clouded by pain for what felt like forever, the floor closed again and I was once again standing on something solid. Apparently that was something they would do for periodic amusement. I could now hear at least two or three Templars outside laughing. One kept saying to do it again. Another said they had to wait… set a pace for the pain, deliver it all at once, what do they do for fun then? For fun?! For fucking FUN?! Those fucking sick bastards, what kind of mind does a person have to have to think putting someone in a device like this is fun?! Rage and dark energy were boiling up within me… and I let it. The dark energy brought a feeling of cold numbness, which blocked out most of the pain. It was not stable dark energy, and I didn't care. I let it be unstable, let it expand and fill me until it was bursting out of me like an explosion… and then there actually was an explosion…

The resultant explosion that blew the iron maiden into three separate pieces… blasted the two doors off to the front, and threw the back half against the wall behind me. One of three Templars got slammed with a door to the iron maiden… it had flipped around in the explosion and he was now impaled on the spikes of the door. Another Templar was staring at me… and kept repeating two words… Oh, shit… oh, shit… oh, shit… He disappeared, abandoning his partners like the coward he was. I was currently pissed and full of unstable dark energy. I used telekinesis to lift the free Templar and slam him into the back half of the iron maiden, impaling him on the spikes there. Must have hit a vital organ or two, because he died quickly. I noticed the one pinned under the door was still moving. I went over and looked at him. His face was contorted by pain and terror. I wondered what I looked like that would instill such a fear response… as if that was a request, I saw a brief 3rd person view of myself… I looked like Sorceress Edea from Final Fantasy VIII (the form usually called the Queen of Night), but in addition to looking like a dark sorceress, I looked dementedly pissed off…

ok… it was a bit disturbing, or it would have been if I hadn't been bursting with unstable dark energy. I stepped on the door under which the terrified Templar was pinned... forcing the spikes further into him, and eliciting a cry of pain and a plea for mercy. I had no urge to be merciful… I gave one more shove down on the door and then walked away as the Templar was grimacing in pain and trying in vain to lift the heavy iron door off of himself.

I walked over to the dungeon door… and did absolutely nothing, but the door blasted off of its hinges apparently of its own accord. I left the dungeon into the main Templar base, throwing dark energy spears at the Templars, randomly impaling them and pinning them to the wall. Some died quickly, others cried out in pain as they hung there dying a much slower death. I got to the center of the base, or what looked like the center, and unleashed an Immortal Fire of pure unstable dark energy, a wall of black flames burst out from me, incinerating everything in its path. I was feeling a bit disoriented… and the scene around me shifted.

*Visions of Castaneda*
Now I was in MoSh's inner world where I had intended to go in the first place. My dark energy had been drained off in the Templar base, and I just felt drained rather than homicidal. I collapsed to my knees in the yard in front of MoSh's house, taking deep breaths and trying to calm myself down. I noticed all my wounds had somehow healed, probably from the intense energy flow… The door to the house flew open and MoSh came running out with Asuka right behind him. MoSh got over to me and was worriedly asking if I was ok… what had happened? I wasn't able to answer right away, which seemed to worry him even more… but finally I was able to tell him I would be ok. Data was there… and he opened a portal. MoSh picked me up… I was trying to tell him I could walk just fine… and carried me through the portal, Asuka followed, and we were in the healing glen. Basara also showed up, and we did a mutual healing, with the crystal golem putting in extra healing energy. My dark energy was stable again, completely controlled.

"Carlos Castaneda," I said to MoSh, "Let's go watch him." MoSh looked surprised. He said no, we didn't have to do that tonight. He said I should get my rest. I felt the dream slipping, too… but for some reason I thought it would be a worst case scenario to let this entire dream be wasted on being tortured by and subsequently killing stupid Templars. I wanted to do something productive. I told him I was ok and I wanted to do it now. I focused on time dilation to stabilize the dream, turning one hour of IWL time into four hours of dream time… I asked for the book… then I remembered it was called 'A Separate Reality' by Carlos Castaneda. I summoned the book. I opened it and skimmed for the word waterfall or don Genaro. Found mention of don Genaro, so I transported MoSh and myself to my room in my inner world and got my laptop. I loaded the book into my laptop through a scanner and then activated the holographic viewing system… I was wondering if it would work… the new scene took shape around us. We could now watch the events in the book… and see the events of the book instead of looking like snack food to a bunch of hungry graboids.

I looked around and saw the target of our viewing. Castaneda, don Juan, and a couple other guys were sitting in a line on a row of rocks that they were using as chairs. They were all staring at a waterfall. The waterfall was quite beautiful, but I didn't see that the beauty of the waterfall alone would command their full attention for that long… I looked over at the waterfall. There was an older man climbing a trail beside the waterfall. It looked like a difficult trail, but the man looked like he was in much better shape than his age might indicate. For the most part he was sure footed about his ascent to the top of the falls where he disappeared from sight.

MoSh touched me on the shoulder and asked if I was sure I was ok… he said it looked like something pretty serious had happened to me. I said I was ok now. He hesitated, then said since we were here, we might as well do it right. He said to point at don Genaro with my pinky when he came back into view. I didn't say anything about that not being my method of energy scanning… I knew what he meant, that was really all that was necessary. The man, apparently don Genaro, appeared by the edge of the waterfall at the top.

I focused on seeing his energy, not just his body. At first I just saw a bright aura, he had strong energy… but also pure and stable. No corruption there, but that wasn't what I was looking for. I watched him for a bit, then his energy field seemed to change its shape, he was clearly manipulating his energy. I watched from next to MoSh as he used tendrils of energy like ropes to help him get to a small stone in the middle of the falls… and then to an even smaller one… somehow without getting swept away. He wouldn't be swept away, he had his energy tendrils to hold on to. He stayed on the second stone for a while, positioning his energy tendrils just right, removing them from the first rock and anchoring them to the far bank of the river… And then he used them to pull himself over to the far bank where he landed with cat-like grace on all fours. He paused there and pulled his energy tendrils back into himself, then finally stood up and looked down at his audience. All four men were staring wide eyed. Don Genaro now momentarily glowed brightly, expanding his energy field in a bright and colorful aura that looked like it might be visible from space… before disappearing from sight on the other side of the waterfall.

It started raining now. The four men who had been sitting got up. I could hear Castaneda talking plaintively to don Juan who was responding as one might to a child who is complaining too much… responding in a tone that sounded like a reprimand… but I couldn't hear what they were saying. And I also had the feeling it didn't matter what they were saying. MoSh and I had been there to see don Genaro's show, not to find out what Carlos Castaneda was complaining to don Juan about… MoSh asked what I had seen. I told him what I had seen, don Genaro using his energy tendrils to help him get across the flowing waterfall without falling off. He commented that it seems I had seen it. I said yeah, I have been able to see energy in the dream state for quite some time… though I didn't remember seeing someone use the energy in that manner before… MoSh said that when Castaneda and don Juan had first watched this, it had been in the physical plane of our own home world… and then Castaneda had written about his experiences, although Castaneda had not been able to see what don Genaro had done at that point. Castaneda had looked, but had not been able to see. That didn't seem odd since most people on our physical plane aren't able to see energy…

The hologram shut down at that point, apparently MoSh and I had seen everything we were going to see. MoSh said don Genaro had been manipulating his energy body on the physical plane of our world. I said yeah, that was pretty cool. I saw MoSh and I were back in my inner world again. I went over to the couch and sat down. MoSh was walking around looking at things. I could feel myself about to wake up again. I told MoSh that I was about to wake up, and time dilation seemed like too much effort to try again when it has never worked the second time anyway. MoSh was saying something else to me when everything faded and I woke.