All DJ Entries

D1 - In office, virus on computer. Technician tries to track via Keypresses on computer being traced.

D2 - In a room in an abandoned house, hiding. Make a break for it down the road. It is a normal suburban area and the roads go on everywhere in every direction. Where to run? There is a large white triangular wall in one direction, I head towards it.

D3 - Stuck in a museum with a girl. We use a cloaking device to hide. I can see its semi transparent from the inside. I am lose contact with her but I have her number and try her at work.
The phone has a camera so I can see her work solleague pick up the phone. There is a bright blue neon light.

D4 - I am driving along a rough country road through a shanty town. The road is all baked mud and rutted.
The car can only make it so far. So I get out and walk.
I walk past a large temple and off the road to under a tree lined path overlooking a grassy area. Two people from the temple offer me shelter for the night. I accept but find it hard sleeping on black leather chairs and keep slipping off.

I am at my job's dock and it looks quite disorted from how it is suppose to look in waking life. I see some people I know talking on the top deck and notice someone trying to wake me up from the bed I was lying down on. Which is wierd...considering I am at work currently. He telling me to get up cause he wants to know who I like more and if this so and so is true about him. I get up and look at him and see what he and the other were argueing about. I decided I'm not interested and leap off the bed to go to no where land. But before I do this I notice a car that is very out of place and I could've sworn I seen it move on it's own.

I sharpen my sight by clenching my eyes real tight to see if there was a driver in there. There was no driver. So I got my hanbds on to the front of this car and notice that it felt extremely light. Light weighted enough that I could move it with my bare hands. I push the car back in to it's right parking spot and didn't think much of it. Soon after I see this woman with redish brown hair darts over to where I am at with a face that looks to be in a hurry. I walk pass her and tell her I got your car back in to the right position. She looks at me and says yeah and I decided to ocntinue walking up to the deck. I sepnd some time up there with the guys before heading back down to get some rest back in the odd bed that is still there. Which I didn't seem to mind sleeping on, outside with everyone watching me.

As I fell asleep in the dream, the scene to where it was my brother and I in this tight nit hallway with those old fashion lights that told you it could go out at anytime. My brother and I were running from this girl with a weird object in here hand. But he and I both assume that if we were hit by that thing or caught by her, it was all over. So we kept running through this maze like hallway hoping to find an end in sight somewhere. But soon we kept finding dead ends and we could hear her shoes racing through the solid concrete floor. That's when I pulled out a hero move and told my brother to go on as I fend her off myself. For some reason my brother didn't say, "no I can't do this without you". He had no problem ditching me and ran off in to the dark to where he'll be eaten hopefully. He's a cool person but his dream self is not. I am eventually greeted by her presence as she tries to attack me.

I dodge and made a left hopeing she didn't hear my breathing. She turns and comes toward my direction as I held my back closely to the front door. I could hear here steps coming closer intill I was face to face with this person. I raise my hand up as it was at this time I became lucid. I wanted to shake her hand and we did. I continue to explore the area as it look like an abandon prison station. I would then have a false awakening but soon made myself really wake up.

Went back to what worked in the first place: SSILD. Realized I was dreaming and decided to complete a dream task. I have been telling myself for the past week and a half that my "lucid adventures" will not start until I find a particular dream character sitting on a park bench near my house. So as soon as I became lucid, I wasted no time in trying to execute this goal. I managed to get out my house and into the street. When I was half-way there, a powerful wind started blowing in the opposite direction making it obnoxiously hard for me to keep moving forward until I started flying into the air.

I immediately tried to resort to my classic dream control tactics of using expectation to get everything under control but to no avail. I was so close too, unfortunately. I don't recall if I woke up later on but I do remember being in Dubai during a terrible sand storm that was pinning me to the side of a building wall.

WARNING, RANT:

I was reading a comment on reddit about the possibility of SSILD being so effective because it takes you outside of your head and quiets the mind whilst trying to fall asleep. This motivated me to try the technique again because I had came to similar conclusions in previous journal entries featuring lucid dreaming had post-meditation. So when doing SSILD, I made sure to go through the cycles as normal but to be aware of the fan that was running in the background of my room. My intention was to get my awareness 'outside' of my head and have it hone in on a distant object. This is mostly easy to do with hearing. For sight, since I was facing the fan, I simply relaxed my eyes and acted as if I was lazily looking through my eyelids and at the fan in the distance. For touch, it was a normal body scan of various sensations but I did lazily try to be aware of the ambient temperature of the room, if that makes any sense.

What I am getting at here is that 'Awareness of Ambience' may be MY key to consistent lucidity. Some of my previous lucid dream inductions seem to attest to this. To anyone reading this, it may seem like I am trying to reinvent the wheel considering so much scientific research has been done to conclusively say that prospective memory and autosuggestion are the critical components of lucid dreaming.

I have no refutation to the work that has been done in the field, it is just that I find 'brute-forcing' my way into lucidity via mantras/hypnosis/autosuggestion/binaural-beats/visualization tends to ruin my sleep and end up barely working. In the past 7 years, I have had FAR better success with simple dream journaling and meditation during a WBTB cycle.

If I can have 4 more lucid dreams this week , I can perhaps begin to form my little pseudo-scientific hypothesis about "Ambience Induced Lucid Dreaming". If I find good results within a 30-day time frame, I guess I can get around to authoring a guide not necessarily about a new technique, but a general approach/tweak to the SSILD method.

It was a great one. Damn memory

Morning of October 18, 2016. Tuesday.



My wife Zsuzsanna and our children as we appear now are living in the Loomis Street house, though I have no memory of my relatives who actually lived there. We hear loud voices from upstairs a few times. It turns out to be at least two young males, possibly college students.

I am outside near the (south) side of the house when I hear some yelling in the upstairs apartment but I do not see anyone. Just as I go back into the house via the front door, one of the unknown males is suddenly there yelling as if he thought I was spying on him just by me being outside. This is the personified preconscious but I am fully non-lucid and do not recognize the essence at this point.

I soon go outside when he is no longer present. I am carrying my large barbell bar. I end up getting my second one because I soon see that the other two males have a couple near the back of the house, sticking out through the door of the laundry room (which is not logical as it is our living area not theirs) though they do not pick them up when they come into the backyard. I hold both my bars up as if for a sword fight. I decide to steal their two barbells, and, along with my two, put them in a (fictional) attic in the house where they cannot get to them. I tell them this directly. The attic is full of features that I falsely recall are mine, including bed frames (dream sign).

We get into a fight and I knock one of them out; the one who had been yelling at our front door earlier (personified preconscious). While the other male stands on the back concrete step for the back door, I end up putting a dagger horizontally through his neck. Still, I feel a little bad about this because he is much younger than me.

Still in the backyard, I place his body in a bucket that is full of water (which of course is very unrealistic as how could someone fit in a bucket). Somehow, the water does not spill out. I decide I will resurrect him.

After I focus more, with the intent to bring the character back, I look down and notice a skull in the bucket (not logical as he was not in skeletal form when put in). Soon however, a long white balloon with a sketchy skeleton design on it slowly rises up from the water as if being pumped up with a bicycle pump. This seems a bit strange to me but does not puzzle me a lot or trigger any significant thoughts. I get the impression that the character goes back to normal in vague liminal space during the waking stage.

---

Because this involves water induction and resurrection, I will assume that this character is my personified conscious self (as it had been determined long ago that the personified preconscious is sometimes a partner to the personified conscious self as a precursor to resolved emergent consciousness in a non-lucid dream, the dream self being the personified subconscious regardless of the “I am” identity - this being obvious because the personified subconscious or dream self cannot remember much at all, unless of course more threads of the conscious self are present). On one level, this could be subliminal reinduction (especially as water is involved); an attempt to “bring my dream back to life”.

---

This was a strange one.

Lee and I were walking in the woods after checking out an insane fantasy view. We were walking back to the car when we passed a bro looking dude. I can't remember who said what or if we bumped into the guy or something, but suddenly he became very pissed at us. We giggled it off and got in this white pickup and started driving down a road in the woods.

About a minute later I look back, and the dude is following us. I tell lee and he gets kind of weirded out, but I decide to make it fun. "It's a race then". Lee floors it. I look back at the dude.

7 white pickup trucks are all ripping after us, full speed in the deep woods. We are fucking dead. Lee hauls ass and we start to panic. We pass a small sports court, next to it is a building with a basement. We both notice it. As we continue down the path we realize that we are heading directly into the den of the beast. There's a Mormon comune up ahead. Lee freaks out and starts to swerve. There is a massive building dead ahead and we skip to a stop.

"MEET ME IN THE BASEMENT! GOOD LUCK!"

I can't get my seatbelt off in time. The trucks close around in a shield wall and I am ripped from the vehicle. Kneeling on the ground, I close my eyes and raise my hands. In the long oment I await the gun barrel to my head. Instead, I feel a hand touch mine. Then another. And another. I am surrounded, my captors all touching me as they begin to recite a prayer. My fear deepens. They want to make me one of them.

I open my eyes and they hold a piece of scripture in front of me and ask me to read it. I read it at a level so indistinguishly quiet that they had to take my word that I said it at all. Then, the indoctrination began. They raised me to my feet and welcomed me to the commune. Immediately the most 'hip' guy closest to my age was assigned to take me around. He was clearly born here and had no idea about the outside world, which could be seen everywhere. He took me outside the building and we looked at the beautiful view of the surrounding forest and valley. I did not RC. I turned and looked, and two beautiful girls came outside. They were sent to seduce me, already in the last few minutes they had noticed that the guy would have little effect in my conversion. The girls were clever but totally brainwashed and used obvious tactics to get me on their side. I looked them all straight in the eyes but never did an RC.

After a little while I was given a bit of freedom of movement, and all the while I had not stopped thinking about what Lee had said. I knew he must have moved on from the basement by now, but if he wasn't brought back, there must be a solid method of escape there. There was an emergancy of some sort, and the men running the place were called to an auxilliary bulding. I was about to waltz off to the basement when they all emerged form a door. They were looking for me, when suddenly I realized, I can fly. Why the fuck am I here when I can fly. I ran past them and leapt in the air, flying up in a shitty spiral toward the stained glass roof of this massive commune building. The leader, who was the ballet teacher from Black Swan, saw me. He screamed and I doubled my efforts to fly. This is when I realized i was dreaming. The feeling was amazing, entering a clear first person perspective and knowing that this is the time for me to be conscious. There was no more play time, no more need to be a slave to this place. I started analyzing the rules of how I fly. I went up through the window, but the man began to scream at me. His voice and incantations created a vortex in this hole in the roof, sucking the glass in and pulling me down. I overpowered him and shot into the sky.

In the epilogue of the dream I lost my lucid state, but I met Lee and he explained to me how he escaped, by stealing a UPS truck

I had a dream last night that was less than pleasant. It had a very video game-like air to it at first with a lot of people in an area where treasure chests were scattered and hidden. The treasure inside would regenerate after a while of being taken, but it was randomized. I found a chest with little daggers and such, but it was someone else's stuff, they were keeping it in the chest for safe keeping and they were not far away. I told them I just wanted the dagger and I pulled a pine tree shaped cream dagger out of the chest, they looked at me weird because this was one of their more useless items one they had many of. I said yes and they let me have it, I walked off to continue my search. I came upon a group near another chest which was also empty, this group was gathered around a table. They spoke to me so I showed them the dagger, they liked it and were very friendly. I smiled and chit chatted with this frosty haired boy for a while before leaving.

The dream fades into a more...serious and um, morbid dream. I was unhappy and I knew why. A figure I can not remember the appearence of had told me 'Ever 150th person must die' he showed me a blue electric grid of names as he explained. Every 150th person must be killed because they make life difficult and such....pretty much to restore order, every 150th person on this name grid would be killed.
Obviously someone I knew and cared about was killed so I wasn't the happiest person and I sorta just went about my time keeping my heartache inside. A child stayed with me in the broken building I had taken resedince. I was a grump, seeming like I was constantly annoyed and tired of this kid's antics, I never smiled... and at the end...a flower with six shaped centers, I jumped through. I ran and the child's parent, was to be killed next. I knew this. The child did not, but he followed and witnessed it. Poor thing shouldn't have seen that, I was about to comfort him when I woke up.

I was in bed with a woman. She was older then me, but not much, perhaps in her late 30's. I think she had red hair, or dark hair. I wondered to myself how I got this lucky. And I realized this was very unusual for me.

The house was in a suburban neighborhood of almost identical houses. When we were downstairs again, I saw something. It was a flying saucer. It looked like the city destroyers from Independence Day, but smaller - about 50 meters (150 feet) in diameter. It had an opening in the bottom center of the saucer, but this wasn't a weapon. It was more of a tractor beam. I think I got really excited, and ran outside. Our neighbor was also on the street, gawking at the ship. I took out my phone and started filming it. But the saucer went hostile. It started snatching people up using the tractor beam. I saw that the "beam" was more of a thin white wire, people got tangled in it, and pulled up to the ship. I ran back inside as my neighbor got taken. I kept filming through the roof (there was a skylight), but the battery power dropped below 8% and shut down my ability to record video before I could get the saucer itself in the image. So instead, I took some snapshots of my neighbor being lifted up by the white "thread". At some point, whoever was flying the saucer became aware I was in the house. I was grabbed by the thread through the back door (which was still closed, it was thin enough to fit between the door frame and the door). It tried to pull me through, but I resisted with all my might. I pulled so hard, I was pulling the wire back, instead of the wire pulling me back. It was during this struggle that I saw something. On the wall there was something that looked like a soap dispenser, and it had English writing on it. Strangely I thought this proved the saucer wasn't piloted by aliens, but rather by humans. I questioned it for a second, realizing the dispenser wasn't part of the ship, but the situation was too hectic for it to fully sink in. Anyway, suddenly the wire gave up, and the vanished again. I went outside, hell-bent on getting out of that neighborhood. I ran around the house and considered climbing a fence, but it was high, had spikes at the top and a high hedge behind it. Luckily, I saw I didn't have to flee anymore, as I saw the saucer fly off in the distance. Interestingly, the girlfriend had disappeared from existence somewhere mid-dream!

I ran away from the house, joining a column of people walking on a dirt road, in the fields next to the houses. I was very emotional by what had just happened, and desperate for someone to believe me. They saw I was very shook up, and realized something must have happened to me. Suddenly I 'realized' the day had been 'reset'. This had all happened before, only then I was the one who didn't believe the UFO believers. The previous day started with this exact event, the column of people walking through the fields (it was a false memory though, I had no such dream).

---

A later dream had me crawling through a ventilation duct, and disarming a flashbang grenade attached to one of the exits as boobytrap. I managed to do it, but there was still lasers and a turret attached to the lasers (cross one of the beams, it riddles you with bullets). I exited the vent same way I got in, and ended up in a supermarket? My ex-friend Fenn was there, and quite of few other people. I talked to him about the trap (I think). His buddy (another ex-friend of mine) Barra was nearby, and looked pissed because I was talking to his best friend. At some point I was wearing a long, white leather coat with fur around the collar (I casually adjusted the collar, that's how I found out).

DILD 1-Not able to see anything, I found myself carrying somebody who sounded like my late grandpa. I could hear my grandma as well. I felt a bed and placed my grandpa there. I told him I couldn't see. Suddenly my vision flicked on. My grandparents were laying in bed, both naked. A soft light shone on them. We rejoiced and talked for a bit before I woke up.

DILD 2- I was looking from my bedroom window across the street.A voice said they needed help. I phased through the window and flew across the street. A tiny brown puppy appeared in my hands and we flew. The puppy said, "Thing about dogs, you can kiss them!" My dog IWL then flew up to join us. We landed someplace where there was a big brontosaurus. I figured I had enough of this nonsence and tried to find an opening to summon an orca. I woke up. I looked at my clock and found I had only been asleep for 5 minutes! Hmm. I did a nose plug and could breathe. I phased through the window and flew outside, again looking for an opening to summon an orca. I tried to summon one but couldn't. I woke up.

I’m playing this Virtual Reality console that intercepts your brain impulses so that your muscle movements move your game character instead of actually making your real muscles move (kind of like Sword Art Online). I’m in this dungeon game that is kind of a mix between Zelda and Shadow of the Colossus. I have to go from room to room, killing the giant dragon that lives in each room. Each dragon starts out invisible, so half of the game’s challenge is the puzzle of how to make the dragon visible so that you can actually kill it. The first dragon I remember facing was one involving a laser trip-wire and invisible fireballs. The dragon starts out blocking the laser so you don’t see it, but once you get close enough, the dragon moves and starts shooting fireballs. The key is to stand in the path of the laser and reflect it at the dragon (using the sounds of fireballs passing by you to locate where it is) to make it visible. I finally accomplish this and quickly manage to kill the dragon.

I don’t really know what causes it, but I suddenly become lucid. However, as soon as this happens, I’m grabbed by an invisible force and pulled sharply downwards. It feels like a ton of strong, invisible hands are pulling me somewhere, and even though I know it’s a dream, I’m still fairly terrified. I try my best to fight back. I struggle to break free of the grasp, then swing my fist, hoping to land a punch on whatever creature is fighting me before being grabbed again by what feels like even more hands. It’s somewhat disorienting, as I have the distinct feeling of being pulled, but the entire scene around me is completely still. This struggle continues for several unnerving minutes. I start to feel like I’m actually shaking and groaning in real life, though it may have been a false dream-me using the VR headset. The monster starts to become slightly more visible each time I hit it, though it’s still mostly a purplish-haze that appears on me while I’m pulled. I finally get to the point where I can’t take it anymore. I reassure myself that I’m dream and that I am in control. I then grab at one of the “hands” and do my best to swing it downwards, hoping to slam whatever is at the other end into the ground. It works, so I keep doing it, getting harder and harder with my swings each time. Finally, I release all my built-up rage towards this monster in one final powerful slam that cracks the concrete beneath it.

The silence is deafening. I stop to catch my breath and take a look at what I’ve done. On the floor lying dead is this dragon-like creature that kind of looks like a blue version of Baloo from Zelda: Wind Waker, but slightly more snake-y. I look around and find that I’m still in the laser tripwire room, but the dragon from that room is back. I don’t feel like fighting it again, so I check my inventory. I see a picture of the beast I just killed - apparently it’s the second-to-last boss in the entire game. I also have the option to summon it to fight for me, which sounds like an awesome idea. I press the button to summon it, but the game kind of glitches out, and I end up standing on its head while it flies upwards, causing me to phase through the ceiling into the room above - the dungeon of the final boss, “Glibc” (frick, I’ve been programming too much lately). Luckily, I manage to escape the room before the boss battle starts.

I find out that the game is being recorded by the Game Grumps for one of their episodes, and once they’re done, they turn off the console, which sends me back outside of the game into this huge ballroom. I meet this guy who I’m apparently supposed to get to know, since we’re going to start working together. I start talking to him, but I notice this holographic display pops up next to him showing his interests compared to mine. They’re all colored red - meaning we share absolutely nothing in common. I try thinking of something to say, but then I wake up.

I’m still kinda shaken up from the nightmare, so I can’t fall asleep right away (so basically a forced WBTB), but I eventually do. I have a small fragment of driving in a huge circle around my entire college campus on this road that somehow intersects itself.

I’m now riding in a car about to meet up with some friends for a game of tennis. I’m riding in a car with two friends (who I don’t actually know in real life), and we see our third friend walking from the parking lot into the park. Apparently one of our traditions is that whenever we see this friend, we throw a shoe at her. So my friend pulls my shoe off and throws it out the window, just barely missing her. We all get out of the car, when we realize that the entire place is infested with these huge yellow ants and a swarm of Beedrills. The ants start crawling up our legs immediately, and I’m especially vulnerable since I’m missing a shoe. I duck my head and hope not to get stung as I run through the Beedrills trying to get back to the car.

DILD - 10
Super Strength - 5
Fully phase through ceiling - 10
WBTB - 2
1 Fragment - 0.5
1 NLD - 1

Night 4 Total - 28.5 pts

I'm in a hotel hallway in front of what I suspect is my hotel room door. I see the door next to where I was planning on going is ajar. I enter the room, and there is a giant decorated Christmas tree in the center, a bed on either side of it, and behind it, there are risers like from a chorus concert in elementary school. I see Lauren, my ex girlfriend, and she has short red hair like from when we were dating, natural red, not like burgundy or dyed red. She tells me that we have to take down the Christmas tree and put the room back to normal. I walk up to the tree but now instead of decorations, it has things from a craft fair all stuck into it... like yard signs, like "Santa Stop Here" and stuff like that, reindeer, etc. Everything is very sparkly and glittery. I start taking the signs out and placing them in piles according to design. Everything in the tree is grouped into bunches of three or four. I look over to the risers, and they're all covered with white cloth, I guess for decoration, or maybe to make it look like snow. It seems like something is moving underneath it, and I want to check it out, but something tells me it's not a good idea.

Bed @ 2245 /w glass of water
Woke @ 0400 /w full bladder

Fragments:
I'm in a flat grasslands, and I'm surrounded by people with horses who I know to be the Rohirrim. I'm pleased with how they treat their horses (and wouldn't expect anything different), but I feel very uneasy about something.

I'm showing off my trackball: especially how I've got buttons on it set up to switch between different virtual desktops and how Synergy lets me control two computers from a single keyboard and mouse.


BTB @ 0410 /w SSILD
Woke on and off through the night

Fragment:
I'm in a strange vehicle that looks like a white, mechanized worm. A bunch of blue goop gets dumped onto its head and a giant circular saw comes down and starts cutting into it where the goop is.


Going for a walk
I'm talking with my wife about the day's schedule. We're going to be taking the subway downtown, and I'd like to stop by my office for a few minutes, since it's near the station. I think I'll have time for about half an hour, but my wife points out that, with walking time and schedule uncertainty, I'm probably not going to have any extra time at all, especially if we plan to have lunch together. There's something about a restaurant in the station itself, walking down the hall from the dining area straight to the ticketing booth.

Now my family and I are walking to the local subway station, and my old friend Brian is with us. We're spread out across a full lane on the road, but there are no cars, so we're safe. We come to a T in the road, headed off to the left, and take it. The road starts going uphill. Now Brian is pushing a small shopping cart with some of our stuff, and he's going (in my opinion) way too fast. I keep thinking that he's either going to tip the cart or run into someone. Eventually, I end up running alongside the front of the cart, keeping one hand on a front corner to guide it. We come across a neighborhood on our right and turn into it.

Now we're standing in the neighborhood near something like a gazebo. Looking through it, we can see that we're right on the edge of a steep slope down, and we have an amazing view of the country beyond. Most of it is flat, but there's a mountain sticking up from the middle. The side of the mountain looks like a patchwork quilt of different colors. I remind my second daughter that the other side of the mountain was all one color and contrast it with how different - and neat - this side looks.

1- My husband and I were on a cruise ship early and we were eating food when my husband realized he forgot our dressy clothes. He said we had plenty of time to go back and get them so we got off the ship (Dreaming because I had no idea where home was) and I couldn't find him anywhere. Needless to say I was walking and running through really bad areas that looked like a ghetto when I made it back to our place(dead giveaway it was a dream) we had a roommate. I kept calling my husband to find out where he was and worried if something happened to him, or did he stay on the ship? I mentioned that to the roommate when she acted as though she was shocked we were on a cruise. I was worried about the dogs. I showed her the directions on the table and she said she couldn't watch them. Now I didn't know where my husband was and the roommate wasn't going to watch the dogs, yet the cruise was paid for and I wasn't going to waste it. I teleported there by just thinking I needed to be back on the ship and if only life were this easy we could actually go on vacation haha. I was back on the ship and spent so much time again searching for my husband and never found him. Very loooooong exhausting dream. So happy to have had sleep last night though :-).

2- It was daytime and I was out in the backyard playing frisbee with dogs when I noticed the moon starting to open up (knew it was a dream, but intrigued to see how it played out). Panels were opening up on it and it looked like a big black opening. There were a bunch of spaceships flying around it that looked really long and rectangular and they were all lining up. I call my husband to come see this and tell him he has to just watch and not talk or move. You could hear the sounds of machinery all the way on earth. People started floating toward the moon like there was no more gravity, only it was just the people moving? I looked at him and his eyes were wide, I told him he was in my dream so he was safe. (This is opposite from my usual flying dream, now I had to keep us both on the ground) The dogs were no longer in my dream but my neighbors dogs and kids were all floating up and they went through the pool cage. My neck felt sore from looking up for so long but I couldn't stop watching. They were piling them into the space busses and taking them to the moon. I know I could have probably done a lot with this one if I was on my own but for some reason it felt good to know I kept my husband safe haha.

Day 4.

A full non lucid dream.

I was a girl, and I was around 17 years old, I had black long hair, and I loved art. I wanted to be an artist. So I entered an Art Academy. My permanent teacher. Was an Artist himself, and was still fully active with making art. He got two students he would teach art, and that were me and a other girl.

The other girl was one year older then me. (18) she had orange curly hair. She looked a little like a lion.

The teacher had black long hair till beneath his shoulders. He was around 24 year, and pretty handsome..

The girl was totally into him, so she tried to flirt with him a lot... But we can't have any love with teachers. It is prohibited, so I try to keep my distance.

But what I noticed, was that the girl wasn't really experienced with art, and almost had nothing she knew about art history.
I really wondered how she entered this Art Academy. You need a portfolio..So I wonder if she had anything good enough to enter?

Anyways, me trying to do what is told, took a big sheet of paper, and I begin to draw rouch sketches of the things I saw in the big white room. (that was the first task, draw what you see in the room)
The other girl still hadn't begun the task we had to do.

The teacher scolded her for not doing his command, and that she had to get started and not get so clingy on him. (She is around him all the time, she is like sticking gum) it didn't bother me much. She can do whatever she wants...but I hope she does something what has to do with art. What she came for..

a little while later, the girl had to go somewheere for a meet up, so he left.
The place was only for me, drawing what I see. And the teacher working on his own things.

It was so quiet. only sounds of paper sounds, and writing sounds. I was almost done with my drawings.
So I had nothing to do. I just take a look at the room, and there were various painting hanging on the wall of famous artists. But I also noticed some who are aren't famous, but I totally knew them.

As a little kid, I always took all the artbooks in the library with me, and looked page for page at all the art that was made. I never got bored, and found all the art wonderful. I also remembered them perfectly who made the art.

I loved art because there always is a story behind it. And that story is made with colors, stripes, and various other things to make that story. You can also draw your emotions with it. There is much you can do iwht drawing. It's the same for tattoos. Although I don't know if I want one yet. Maybe later in the future. I am still too young for it.

Back to present. I watched a painting in the room. It was my most favorite of all. It was dark painting with a burned down forest, and a white dressed woman sitting next to a pool of black water.

I was absorbed in the painting, till the teacher suddenly stood next to me, watching the painting with me.

He asks me, "do you like this painting? You know who made it?"

"Yes.... I really like it. It is so dark, like I can feel it through, and I am standing there. I can feel all the emotion." "Also... The artist who made it is ......."

Him, "Yes, you are right with the emotion. I also can feel it and be absorbed with it, as If I am standing there, feeling pain. It's that this is on my top 1 most emotions painting. And the artist isn't that famous, but you still know the name who made it, that is incredible."

His compliment skips a beat.... "I-it's nothing.. I saw it in a artbook when I was young, and it became my motivation to make my own art like it."

"Mmmmmm, interesting. I'll help you reach your goal since you are my student."

"Y-yes!! Thank you very much, please take good care of me!! I'm looking forward to it."

He smiles and says, "haha, take good care of me too, I am looking forward to it."

It was already time to go home, but full of happiness. (I wonder what kind of art he makes?)

The next day we begun painting what we feel. Put your emotions on the painting. I was happy with this task, because it is what painted the painting I love the most. It will be a good experience! The other girl was not that happy like I was, and only stood there bored, with her phone in her hand. Chatting with her friends. (I don't like her that much... Why is she even here if she doesn't do anything?)

Well, I'll ignore her. I started thinking of my emotions. Trying to think of colors that would fit them. When I know what I am going to use, I get started with mixing colors.

While I was painting, the teacher entered the room after he brought some paperwork to the director. The orangehair girl, immediately putted her phone away, and jumped like, on his shoulders. The teacher was totally annoyed with it, but stayed calm. He tried to get the girl started with her painting.
They sure look lovely dovey though.... Not that I mind... I think. (Argh, what am I saying? I shouldn't think anything about it, a relationship with a teacher is forbidden, so she can't, and.....I can't.)

I was still painting my emotion that I suddenly noticed that I used more dark colors, because of how annoyed I was with the girl.

(Whoops! I wasn't planning to paint colors of annoyance...)



The teacher saw my shocked look, and begun walking towards me. (Whaaaaa nooo, don't look pls! It is totally messed up..) I say that on the inside, but on the outside I try to stay calm.

He then stood next to me, observing my painting. (Ahhh, he is so close! Wait.. Why am I freaking out? It is just a teacher!)

I step a little bit away to keep the distance.

He doesn't notice a thing.

"Hooooooo, so first happy feelings and then suddenly you get a turn of emotion of annoyance.." "I wonder why you suddenly got annoyed? I wonder if it is the girl who doesn't do what is told and is too lazy to do anything?"

"......" (I had no words, he knew exactly what I was thinking..) I stayed silent for a while, finding words to say.
He breaked the ice, "Haha, it's okay. I am also worried that she can be thrown out of the academy if she doesn't do anything, I am trying to get her to work."

I answer, "Yeah, but I also wonder how she entered here, can you tell me?"

The teacher stares to emptiness, and answers, "That is classified information, I am sorry I can't tell you."

"Oh... No worries, it's okay." (Classified information huh....)

Later on the day, the girl still didn't do much, and tried to flirt with the teacher again. He tried to get her off his back, and working on his paperwork he has to finish. Me, already done with my painting, and totally satisfied...Even though some colors of annoyance weren't meant to be here. I am ok with it.

On a nearby green sofa, I layed down, and let my thoughts out for a while. This sofa is soft... I am little sleepy.. But I try to stay awake, I am in school, I can't fall asleep at this place. I stared at the ceiling, and walked with my eyes from up to bottom, observing it. When I noticed there was a painting hanged up in the middle of it. I instantly knew which artist made the painting. It was again on of my favorite paintings after the dark painting.

This painting is very old, and a reference of the style that was used in the stone age, were people drew drawings on stone.

This was a painting made with tools direct out of the nature. Like stones with colors, and the colors of plants. It is overall orange-brown, and used with more dark brown for the figure of the face of a man with a large chin. There were also white spots overall on the painting. As if the man in the painting drew on himself with patrons. While staring at the painting I closed my eyes.

A while later I woke up, because I heard someone calling out my name.

".....!! .......!!!! ...!!"

"Mmmm......yeah??"

I get a blurry vision of a figure with black long hair. Sitting next me.

(Whaaaaaaaa!!!!!!)

I opened my eyes instantly, and could see better this time. Did I fall asleep?? Damn! I didn't plan to fall asleep at school!!

I sit up. And he asks, "haha, did you have a nice nap? The other girl is already gone."

"Whaaaa, sorry! I didn't mean to sleep here, I was just laying, an staring at the painting on the ceiling, and instantly fell asleep without noticing."

I apologize countless times.

"Haha, it's okay, if you are tired you should sleep. Don't push yourself too hard, you have to be healthy to make good paintings. You can always nap here if you feel like it."

"......Alright, thank you for being so kind."

Then he asks me a question.

"So, do you know who made the painting, hanged up on the ceiling?"

"Yeah... It is '.......' from Africa. I remember every artist and painting I see, even the more unpopular ones."

"Haha, you know pretty well, you really like arthistory, don't you?"

"..yeah, it tells everything about a story. It fascinates me."

It stays silent for a while. And then I think about that I should go home to make dinner.

"I should go teacher, I had a great day! Teach me more tomorrow!"

I stand up, and walk away to take my jacket and bag. When I try to escape the room, the teacher grabs my arm, and pulls me to him, kissing me on the lips. (Whaaaaaa???!!!! What's happening?) I try to push him away, but that didn't work, because of his strong arms. (A teacher kissing a student? That is forbidden right? Why is he kissing me?) I then stare to his eyes, when he opens them. I see my reflection cleary into his grey eyes.

It's there that I woke up... Why at that moment? I wanted more... Anyways, hope you liked it^^.
*Sorry if grammar isn't correct!! If there is anything wrong, you can tell me!! thank you*

I was at home at my dads house. It was a summer morning and I were about to go school, but before I wanted make sure everything was really shutted down.
I went back to my room and found my computer was still running even though I'd press on shut off, the screen was off but the fans in the computer were still on - so I turned it off on the backside.
Then my sister suddenly were home and she were gonna start the washingmachine, I told her not to do it if she's not going to be home all day, as well she had loaded the washingmachine with barely any clothes so I told her to fill it up instead. I pressed on a button to finish the washing immeditly.
I felt in a rush for school, I went to the office where I'd my backpack and suddenly I felt that I needed to have a shit, I couldn't hold myself and a second later I'd a pile of diarrhea on the floor.
I went to toilet to gather paper and I told my sister that I just need to take up some shit I'd and told her it looked like melted chocolate.
As I wiped up shit I noticed a pack of toiletpaper was nearby that also had some diarrhea on it, so I grabbed that paper and wiped up all diarrhea.
Then I were walk to the hall to get my outdoor clothes and rush to school.

the end.