dream fragment

I can barely remember being in the city with a lot of friends, and somehow we had to kill each other to survive, I guess like The Hunger Games. I survived and woke up into another dream, in which I was in the beach with the same friend who didn't kill me. I said to him: 'I just had a dream and you had to kill me haha'. He was with his cousin and we went into the water.

Morning of March 3, 2014. Monday.



There is something quite odd going on here in this one. Apparently, when someone dies, their body is then inhabited by a living relative who acts “as them” at some sort of celebration or diverse variant of a funeral and longer wake, I believe over two weeks or so. I am not sure I ever had a dream of this nature or anywhere near it. There are even serious questions brought up (in my own mind) about the practice later on.

Somehow, the situation is relating to two sisters who have passed on in reality (Carol and Marilyn) and my mother. (I am wondering if this is some sort of variation on the “three women” theme I have sometimes had since earliest memory.)

Sister Marilyn is “alive” in body, inhabited by a brother-in-law’s relative, Vickie R. We talk, although there is something very unusual and “new” about the whole scenario. Carol actually seems like herself, but I guess that is relative to the acting skills of the one who is “inhabiting” her. Most of the scenario takes place at sister Marilyn’s house. I do not recall any other specific locations.

Apparently, the relative who inhabits the body of the deceased for all the ceremonies and interaction and such is asleep (that is, their physical body is asleep) during that time period, being that person with the energies of their spirit and mind (even though I also sense that the person who inhabits the relative is somehow also living their waking life normally at times - which does not seem possible in afterthought). However, I have to wonder that if the person who is deceased is actually deceased, then how does their body function at all, especially after a week or two? They seem healthy and normal in their speech and manner. I also am not sure why my two sisters and mother are in this event all at the same time, since they had died at completely different times.

Over time, I start to question how the deceased were no longer alive in the first place, as, in my dream, death makes no sense at all in the way it is portrayed, that is, how could the body be activated by a relative unless the person (the deceased) was forced out of their own body somehow (for example, how could you die if the body was still fully working or “inhabitable” by a spirit or soul or mental energy) - which makes me somewhat suspicious of the practice of this “alternate world”. My mother seems no different, that is, it seems to be actually her, at least most of the time. Marilyn is the only one where the inhabitant is actually identified for certain. However, there is also the idea that my mother’s “driver” is the spirit or energy of someone who has also died prior to my mother, which makes even less sense, making my dream more ambiguous at one point, although this is not certain. Even less sensible, if spirits can survive beyond death, could they just inhabit their own bodies in the way the relatives do in this case and live normally? (For some reason, I am not taking the fact of how bodies age into the equation - dream amnesia, I guess.)

There is not much drama; mostly an unusual suspicion over how people actually die in this alternate world. It is not a strong emotion; I am just wondering what exactly is going on and how long it will last. It even seems slightly like a holiday at one point.

1. [Non-Lucid]
Watching a guy/friend play this racing game, he does really well, I decided to have a go to to try and beat him, first go I failed almost immediately and said "uhh that was just a test" so I tried again and I'm terrible at this game and thus fail repeatedly.

We have to go get on a couch to somewhere so we stop playing and exit the room which turned out to be a cinema, outside are lots of parked buses, the coach I'm getting on seems to just be a slightly bigger bus but then we walk over to the side and the coaches hull carries on sideways like its flexible in the middle, we walk further round and opens up, there are spiral staircases (Laura randomly appears for second or 2) I take the left staircase.

When I get to the top theirs a barrier and a woman with a device in the shape of a stick that she attaches to my chairs left footplate, then I go on through. Now I come to a wall we have to climb, I don't really remember what happened except all the while I could hear 2 women arguing and swearing at each other, we almost reach the end, to get to the end we need to grab onto a ledge, so trying this i slip and fall grabbing onto some random blue string dangling from the ledge but unfortunately for me it can't hold my weight and I fall...probably to my death.

Fragments:
I'm looking for Mr.Thelton for some reason, I eventually find him.

Possible dream signs:
Laura

01-03-2014
I had quite a few dreams last night. The most prevalent one being where I could hear my parents coming home and I went to my car to get something. Only to realise that all of my doors and my boot were open. I think one of the back doors was even missing. I realised I'd been robbed. I parked my car in the garage with both of my parents cars, and my mother "new" blue car. Which means that somehow 4 cars were parked into a two car garage. I spoke to them for a bit before going inside. For some reason while I was locking up the gate I was viciously terrified of being robbed and just wanted to lock up as soon as possible. I was inside and locked up when one of my parents said something to me. It was really scary and I realised that theres no way tis could be real. So I realised it was a dream and I tried to fly off. But as usual my subconscious tries to mess me up by having my parents tell me theres no escape and one of them flew after me. I was flying super fast in the air and was way up in the sky. It didn't even look like earth anymore it looked like the setting from one of my childhood dreams. It was very game-like and there were cats with wings and projectiles being shot everywhere(to precent one from flying out of the atmosphere) I decreased my height and was being chased by one of my parents who had morphed into some weird looking angelic boy. I flew behind a car( which was floating in the sky) and the boy ran out of altitude at that height and plummeted back towards my house. My dream was telling me that because I had exceeded my flying limit that my body was dead and I was about to fall as well. S I leaned against the car until my body had regenerated all of my health back.

Then for some reason I was back at my house. I did a nose RC and it worked so I became lucid again. Before my parents could speak I ran out of the house( my fear always fucks up my control) and started running at mach speed. Something was chasing after me and after some time I realised it was a howler monkey. Some car lights came on in front of me so I took a different path to the left in order to avoid getting looped back to my parents house. I turned myself into a monkey to confuse the one following me and then set upon a path that no creature other than a monkey could ever follow through bushes and bouncing off trees and under logs etc. the monkey chasing me still hadn't lost me. A rabbit started chasing me and trying to knock me down but he was way too small. So I tapped into his conscious and had him attack the other monkey. Then we were on the other side of my house near the cricket nets and I jumped up onto them. The monkey was replaced by a group of guys from my old highschool and one of them was trying to bully me. I climbed up to the top of the net and then it started to fall down so I jumped off it on the other side. The guy trying to bully me slipped through the gap formed by the net falling and wanted to fight. Which makes no sense because although he's bigger than me IRL and weighs like 90 kilos he doesn't have a chance of beating me. I beat him to a pulp and I think I broke one of his arms. Then the rest of the guys( now turned into a bunch of big drunk englishmen were through the net. I tried to climb the next net but the grab-able part( new word) was on the other side so I slid down. I now was in a small enclosed room and had to fight all of these guys without any lucid powers because I'm pretty sure I was no longer lucid... I was smashing faces in and elbowing one of my high school friends in the face repeatedly because he was all weird and stuff. Eventually a trannie had found its way in and was touching my back. I got my friend in a choke but said in his ear "dude lets pretend we're fighting so hard that we have to move to the opposite side of the room so that we're far away from this trannie!" He agreed and we moved away but now all the guys had run to this side of the room to escape. I found a door and we all got out.

We were in a little lobby/garage and there were weapons lying on a table. Most of them were bata but there were a few machetes and katanas lying around. I grabbed a katana(yes I am an anime nerd) but it didn't have a handle. So I took a broadsword instead that was in a hockey stick bag and I ran out of the lobby into the room next door. For some reason I knew this was the women's room and the room I was previously in was the mens room. I ran in and the girls were screaming that some kind of military was there and they were armed. I ran towards one of their ships that had landed( we were now outside and it was daytime again) and three guys were running towards the ship to do exactly what I was planning to do. So we joined up as a group and attacked the ship. The first guy from the group was a really fast runner so he arrived first surrounded by four guys and started trying to fight them. I figured he'd end up dead so I ran to a guard that was aiming at him from far. He turned around when he saw me but he was so frightened( rookie, hmph) that he hesitated for a moment. I slid underneath his guns range and grabbed him around the neck. I wanted to kill him but the other guys with me told me to use non lethal force. One of them pistol-whipped the guard with his own gun and we carried on. I was angry because I was so sure that he had killed the guard with the amount of force he used and he had just lectured me on toning down my violence. As we got closer to the ship I woke up.

On a side note I had a dream where my brother was standing near my bed and my father was lying in it. I wanted to hug my brother but he wasn't in the mood. Then my father told me I must join some political party within 6 years. I thought a lecture was coming so I was getting ready to switch off/argue but then he started talking about how black people in the past were discriminated against and he started choking up so I started crying as well.

Truth be told I had no idea I would write this much of the dream because I didn't remember the majority of it until I started writing it down. Oh well! Guess I still have some decent dream recall

1. [Lucid]
I'm in a taxi heading somewhere, I recognize the route, //suddenly I think to myself "if this was a dream I could levitate" and perform the levitation RC, the RC failed but I was almost certain this was a dream, I became filled with joy at this point, but my subconscious kept thinking of reasons why this is waking life and in turn nothing happened and the taxi carried on.//

2. [Lucid]
//I'm laying in a bed, its dark, I keep repeatedly looking to my right and I see a dark silhouette of someones shoulder, I kept feeling a tingling sensation all the way through my body and this felt really good, I also kept curling up into a ball, all the while worried about the time.//

-------------------

Legend:
// - Lucid

Fragments:
In a strange narrow area with ladders everywhere used as platforms.
A parking lot

Possible dream signs:
Taxi, Ladders

Morning of March 2, 2014. Sunday.



I still have a cold (trying to keep it in the “background” other than with the cough on the first few days), but it is being “knocked back” day by day over seven days (had a lot of exercise today shopping and pushing heavy stuff around) - do not know how I ended up with a cold - as I said before, did not feel it “come in” like I did in the past. I can keep myself “out” of the cold, “in state” (which a special sound pulsing I have used all my life) for several hours or more, but it flows back in each time I “return” (a bit “weaker” each time, though) - so apparently even the universe cannot cure a cold (like it instantly removes a toothache, rebuilt my left forearm nerves and muscle over time, and healed my wife’s right leg from leaking cartilage, and several other things I can be thankful for and one more thing people “do not believe in” but I care not) - or maybe I have not found the exact “trigger” or symbolic phrasing to do it yet. I guess I still have patterns to learn. Exact pattern nuances can be tricky and completely unpredictable (at first) as I have learned - and they never use a word with even the slightest negative connotations unlike all the commercial rubbish out there (such as “I am not” this, “I no longer” that, “I will stop smoking”, “I will lose weight”, and so on - absurd and completely wrong phrasing in every way imaginable - and they actually make money with this fraud).

---

In my dream, I am at my sister Marilyn’s house. Though I have validated many instances of legitimate “communication” with my relatives (far outside of what is considered “possible” by other people which of course means nothing to me in light of actual experience) when alive or in the actual state of dying (even of John Belushi), I still wonder somewhat if potential contact after their passing on holds any merit. In the case of my parents, I am certain enough that it was “something more” (and unexplainable by normal means), but not sure about other connections at certain levels. This dream is somewhat “average” (actually much lower than average in the second section) and I do not consider it paranormal in any way in contrast to the precognitive/telepathic ones where I learned about sister Marilyn in the first place in such detail and those were validated at other composite levels (regarding additional and unrelated yet-to-be experiences) with intriguing precision as is often the case.

I go into the front room and call to Marilyn and try to “force” an association and encounter (even though this is not a lucid dream, oddly enough). I seem very mournful. Marilyn was like a “second mother” to me in my later years. She eventually does appear in another room (the smaller northeast one) and comes out and gives me a hug and it seems to go on for some time. She appears as she did when I was about twenty. There is no sense of additional energy or external presence as with some encounters in dreams, not even as much energy as some tulpas, but there is still a deep comfort. In another recent dream, it was brother Jim that gave me hugs (although that was far more vivid with more energy).

Later, I find myself with a need to go somewhere, though I do not recall the details. This dream introduces a brand new composite. My sister’s backyard, instead of leading into the north/south-oriented alley as in real life, leads out directly onto Tenth Street on the other side of town, which is perpendicular to King Street, and the boarding house is there on the corner, appearing much as in reality. It is wintertime (well, it would be there in reality as well) and ice and snow is everywhere. Leonard the pinhead and another person who lived there for a short time nicknamed “Squeaky” are out on the sidewalk, across from each other (“Squeaky” on the front lawn and Leonard on the boulevard). Leonard seems to be picking at loose skin on his left index finger and seems more aware and “present” than in life. (He also actually speaks like a normal person - which is intriguing in afterthought.) Squeaky got his name from attempting to go near the pinhead’s living area (when he was sleeping) without being heard and stepped on a particular board near the doorway that made a loud squeak - and he accidentally repeated this a few times no matter how careful he tried to be.

I ask Leonard about his finger but notice that I should probably be picking up some of the ice from the sidewalk in order to (if only symbolically) “pay back” the owners for ways that they had helped me in the past. I start picking up the ice chunks from the sidewalk and throw the pieces into the yard. They are about the size of a larger hardcover book and larger (and like most “ice dreams”, this part becomes a bit more vivid). Leonard says that his finger is recovering from the pinworm they (I assume legitimate doctors) took out recently. (This makes little sense as pinworms are “small threadlike worms infesting human intestines especially in children”. It is probably some sort of play on “pinhead”.) He talks about the “paraphernalia” they were looking for - a word that I have not heard in a long time (which oddly does not have the definition I am familiar with in the free dictionary site I mostly only use to quickly check spellings, as it gives suggestions for any word it does not have in it). Paraphernalia can be found at a “head shop” and is used by police to describe hash pipes and anything to describe items that are used for illegal drug usage. I am a bit confused though, as I am fairly certain that, other than a can of beer a couple of times a year or so, neither Squeaky nor Leonard used any sort of recreational drug even though there seems a vague concern about such matters at this point within my dream. As I continue to remove the ice, I see a few instances of desiccated dog poo (that had been frozen for awhile, I guess) near the edge of the sidewalk - and decide not to help the owners anymore (who I do not actually see at any time)…

---

Obviously, my dream, at least in part, is a play on “trying to get rid of a cold so I can move on” (or to “clear out” the cold/ice to walk on down the street…) and the dog poo represents that the virus’s effects are still a part of my present physiology - even though the “worm” itself is gone. “Paraphernalia” seems the clearest expression from the pinhead, which is possibly a play on “Pariah” in his case. I was his only friend for a time. One of his only day to day activities was fishing (with worms). As such, this may also be related to a distorted fishing concept, which symbolizes emergence from sleep.

This is just a little fragment I remember.

I was walking into a field/ park( with that green chain link fence) and I saw Mario( the Video game character). I was supposed to distract him, although at the time I didn't know it. I went over to talk to him and we decided in a challenge to climb trees to reach a person. As we got to the trees I distinctly remember commenting that the trees were poplar and I touched the bark. Mario agreed and we began to climb. I beat him to the top and there was a man and I grabbed him.
Then I was in a comic store and the male cashier showed me a message from my three sisters and a guy and they were drunk. And then I chose toothpaste from the glass case. There was two kinds but one was actually acid. It was like a trick but I decided on the first one and the man got it for me and brushed his own teeth. I kept hearing bubbling noises but it I had chosen the non acid toothpaste. Then the man told me that a series of events could have been avoided if I hadn't taken so long with Mario. I was like, "of course if I has just given him cheese". And then I saw a scene of Mario eating cheese.

March 1st, 2014

6:30 am non-lucid

Dream recall triggered by playing Animal Crossing and seeing a fish's shadow.

Had a dream about the fish イトウ in the mode of Animal Crossing.

I had a nice and some what strange dream experience last night.
I was in a dream, i'm not sure exactly what was happening , someone was standing behind a glass door taunting me, i said something like : i will put my hands through , i will, oh yeah i am dreaming, i try to put my hands through but it just stretches like plastic the marks from my hands stay imbedded in the glass.
The next thing i know i am flying out my window... The house and yard look nothing like my real house or any thing i have ever seen.. I fly into the sun near atree and turn around the sun is really warm and nice.. I face a highrise buildings i land backwards on the grass and slide as i land.. The grass is nice and soft on my bare feet.. I look over at the highrice and notice my mum grandma and aunt sitting on the balcony so i fly over there but i am stuck 2 floors below them i can't fly any higher so i cling on to the side of the building and climb up... There is cockatoo shit all over the chairs.. I notice my brother eat some pizza he offers me some when i go over to get it he pretends he wasn't talking to me and everyone laughs... This infuriated me so i try and shove the pizza in his face .. He starts rubbing it all in his hair and everyone laughs again ..

I wake up in bed eating some pizza .. It the occurs to me that i don't have any pizza in the house and even if i did i wouldn't eat it in bed in the middle of the night lol... False awakening ...

I wake up again and slide my hand under my pillow there is a whole bunch of pizza crust under there and heaps of crumbs ... Lol ..., false awakening again..

1. I’m at ‘home’, and Rane comes up to me and asks me if I need anything from the store. I think about how I need pure pumpkin and mini chocolate chips. I try to find something to write it down on. There are brown strips and white squares of paper, but they’re all written on already. I go to the bottom of the brown stack and find a folded one with nothing on it.

My handwriting is near child-like, with all-capitals. After I underline it, I see that instead of writing my name, I wrote “TAKEN”.

A young guy comes in to hear what I need. I think he’s too young to go on his own and to pay for it, so I take out my card, but he shows me that he already has one. He was a bit heavyset with short, blond/brown hair.

-Gap-

We’re walking through the store. As I look through my wallet for my card, I realize…it’s not there. I quickly grab my buggy and start speedwalking away. The guy calls out to me but I ignore him.

I wade through a bunch of people with kids and carts loaded with Christmas items – trees and presents, as apparently there’s a contest going on. Some of them are complaining about me but I just focus on getting out of the store.

I’m standing at the bottom looking up the steps. There’s an older man sitting there, and he starts telling me about how people don’t make their salads with lemon right anymore. Instead of replying verbally, I start typing up my response on a typewriter-like keyboard, but a regular screen. It’s something about how it all boils down to laziness. I notice two typos but struggle to fix them.

Suddenly, a woman standing on the left gives me a knowing look and says ‘you’re blind, aren’t you?’. I stare at her blankly for a moment, but then go along with it. She takes the ‘computer’ from me and points out my typos. As she works on it, I try to read it from where I am, and she says ‘you’re looking the wrong way’. Perhaps she assumes I’m trying to look in the direction of the man, who's talking. I look a bit to the right of her into the bright yellow sun, as seen coming out of trees and such.

-Gap-

I’m walking away from the store. I get a certain distance away before I stop in place, as if I had a thought, or waiting for something.

A man calls out to me that I forgot my purse. I look over my shoulder and see my old black purse sitting on the ground.

I’m looking for a vehicle to leave, but remember that I didn’t have one, I could leave by….I don’t remember.

Inspiration: I forgot my card a few weeks ago when we headed out to the store. Lemon is a trigger in a memory palace, as is Christmas trees and presents. I'd been thinking about pure pumpkin and mini chocolate chips for a few days because I needed them. I recently switched from a black purse I used for a long time to a new brown one.

2. Lying on a bed side by side with another girl. She gets something on her hand and points it out. We get up and see that there’s a light blood stain on the sheets under where I was lying. I deny that it’s from me, because I don’t have blood on me anywhere.

I’m wearing a dress with a built-in bra, but am still wearing one underneath it, and don’t take it off to sleep.

Inspiration: I'm thinking the 'Triad' dream sparked off a whole set of F/F dreams. XD

3. A shower is halfway full of water as I go to step in, and I see that there’s a floating pair of men’s underwear. As I carefully pick it up, I see that it’s stained. Wrinkling my nose, I put it on the side of the tub out of the way.

4. I remember a fragment where I was in a building and people were talking past. I waded into them to get to the wall, and carefully went around a wood section when the way was clear. I believe a guy came to help me.

The guy is crushing on me, it’s almost stalker level. He asks me to listen to a music CD he made.

-Gap-

I get into his bag and find the disc labeled 3&4 with notes under each section. I confess to him that I did it and that I loved the songs.

5. I’m sitting on my grandma’s porch talking to a man who’s sitting in a chair across from me. I say something about 'something being in my memory palace'.

“Whose memory palace?” The man replies, and as I go to answer “mine”, he points next to me. I look over to see Sherlock Holmes (BBC) sitting there.

Inspiration: Recently did an interview about my mind palace and mentioned Sherlock.

6. A diamond in my ring is missing, someone says they can fix it? I know there was more to this but my trigger probably wasn’t enough.

Notes:

I am really excited to try adding/accessing my memory palace while within a dream. Imagine how much easier it’d be to just add things from within a dream here and there, than to have to lay there and remember the dreams all at once. Only thing is with that I might not be able to note the time, unless I still wake up – I could add the time then.

Or what if I put stuff in my memory palace to access for when I’m in dreams? Like TotM, things to try, a storyline, character, etc that I want to incubate...

1. A woman is walking through a trail with another one. She suggests the other woman show her breasts, but she replies that she got away with it last year at Christmas, but there are too many people there now (for Halloween). The woman looks around and sees various groups walking around.

A man, their lover, watches nearby from a tree, thinking they look good together.

Inspiration: Listening to ‘Triad’?

2. Walking through a building.

In a room full of beds and stuff, it’s a place for people to hang out and rest. I’m lying down, and a couple on the bed to the right of me are bouncing around being a bit noisy. I know there’s no rule against it, but I know the people in the room are trying to sleep.

Notes: I love the ‘walking through a building dream’. I don’t know where I take the layouts from but it’s fun exploring.

23:

Standing in a building looking out a window. A man is running around out front making a lot of noise. I realize he’s trying to draw zombies to the building. But then a squad of police-type guys dressed in white suits come and take the zombies down.

Inspiration: Thinking about The Walking Dead coming on the next day.

25:

1. I’m helping my grandma (dad’s mom, deceased). There are people around us. I get her some food. She asks for something and I hold up a thin bottle of pills. I bring them to her but she says that not the kind she was wanting. I look at the label and see that it says to take one when you’re feeling down and it’ll make you content.

I say that I can understand not wanting to take it, I barely like taking ibuprofen when I have a headache. She says that she’ll take those over ones that just dumb the feeling down rather than treat it.

Inspiration: Sister getting the wrong thing in the mail, my own feelings towards certain medications.

2. The visuals in this are kind of nonexistent but here’s what I think happened: ‘Me’ riding in the arms of a robot as we escape. We ‘drive’ backwards on some kinda of road for a long time, and he has to keep telling me which way to distribute my weight. We felt very close, very important to each other.

Next thing, I’m waking up and asking where he is. Someone tells me that he’s in the freezer, recovering because he was fatigued.

Note: Possibly inspired by my watching/thinking about Almost Human.

3. Mom putting some grape kool-aid flavoring into some water, and me thinking, ‘oh, she bought some?’ and feeling down that I didn’t get any, had no money to.

Inspiration: From talking to mom about wanting more and what flavors we’d get.

21:

All I remember is a yellow school bus, and that the other two dream things were yellow. Oh, one was soup, inspired by me wanting chicken and noodles and putting it in my palace.

Inspiration: Probably adding yellow things to Lucas' House for a visualization exercise. XD That is so cool, must do some experimenting with that if it keeps happening. It could be effective incubation. Maybe I could make one house in Sandgem Town specifically for incubation.

22:

In the school yard. I hear a man yell for his kids. The mother was neglecting them. I flew up to them, there were three. (Two little boys and a girl?) I swooped them into my arms and flew away with them.

I feel like there was something else, but I don’t remember it.

1. Mom helping my clip some of my nails, which have chipped off in places, including beyond the quick.

Inspiration: Worrying about my jagged toenail?

2. There’s an ad on Tumblr for a ‘discount’ on Memories.

3. A dark-haired, muscled young man is being held and tortured in a dark, cell-type area. He apparently lost his female love to the torturers, and they killed their baby and pinned it to a wall.

Then, a young man and woman come to him, opening their arms to him and drawing him to them, his saviors. The female had shoulder length brown/blond hair or maybe longer, male had shorter hair.

4. In a storage-type building, a group of friends are giving away units full of gifts in an exchange. They’re all standing in the entrance to them in a circle.

Two girls are sitting up in a loft-type area above the units. One of them is showing the other a card of a drawn woman. One of them says how they like the style it’s drawn in.

Inspiration: I told mom earlier that evening that I liked the style a card she showed me was drawn in.

Long story short: Computer broke, couldn't fix it, using crappy laptop now. :[ The dreams from 2-18 on are ones I've stored in my Pokemon Platinum memory palace.

1. Me? and a fairy. Or I was the fairy? Wandering around a house. Outside the house looking in a window, the fairy is inside. I bust the window to get her out.

Inspiration: Fairy is one of my Persons in PAO (#84).

2. A really big tennis ball falling over a cliff and onto an old shack, down into a ravine.

Inspiration: Used a tennis ball as a trigger in my bedroom memory palace for 'the park'.

3. Mom and Smoke paralyzed.