side notes

I fell asleep at 4am and dreamed about The Sims and one of my professors. (I'd seen this professor the other day around town and said hi, remembering that spring break is over and I go back tomorrow ). So I had gone back to class and he was trying this new thing. He wanted us to play The Sims and create ourselves or something. A starter house.

I remember thinking, really? I've been playing this game for 12 years and you want us to play the original version. (I really have been playing that long, I just counted it up and Wow, I'm a loser. lol) Anyway, in the dream I was all big-headed and knew I would be the best player there. lol. I realize how silly that sounds, but I was really excited to show my "simmin'" skills.

So I play for a little bit and remember thinking how weird the first game was since I've been playing the third for so long now. So simple and I really might as well go make myself a paper doll house and put on a pretty pink school girl dress.

So I'm sitting at this computer for a while and I'm looking around at other people playing the game. Their screens look different than mine and not in any physical way in how they appeared, but they seemed different, brighter and more new than mine. Still, not in appearance, I guess in my head.

I don't know, dreams are so weird.

Anyway, a few people start getting up and leaving and my professor is telling them goodbye, see ya thursday. I get up and say, wow, is it time to leave already? I start grabbing my things and realize that a few students had stayed and were sitting in a circular group on the floor in the middle of the room. My professor was with them and they had looked at me when I spoke. I saw that the clock on the wall read 5:42, but it wasn't a digital clock or anything so it looked a lot bigger than usual and it's a fuzzy picture, but hey, I knew the time. I realized we still had another 45 minutes of class left.

I asked him if we could go and he said yea, that's fine. I turn to leave but I notice the look on my professor's face. His eyes are bright and he's smiling at me. I stop and say, well, I guess I can hang out with you guys for a bit. I go to join the group and wake up at 6am with my son in his bed, ready to eat some breakfast.

I was actually enjoying the dream. So I was little upset to wake up from it. I really don't know why, it wasn't anything spectacular. Sometimes good dreams don't even seem all that great when you're in them, but when you wake up, you realize you were having a good time.

I need to quit playing The Sims, but they do have an interesting way of working into your dreams. When I was 12 or so my aunt had the game at her house and we didn't have a computer. I'd stay with her for a week or so every now and then and I remember getting really hooked on that game. She'd let me stay up all night and play it.

When I had gone home the next few weeks I kept having dreams about playing. I remember even at 12 that playing in the dream was a lot more fun than in real life. I knew I could do so much more with it in my dream. Interestingly enough, that's around the same time I had my first lucid dream.

When I recall the dreams I had about The Sims back then, I think I might've been lucid in a few of those. Of course, definitely not realizing what it was or how important it would be to me later on in life.

This was a really long and interesting night for me. I went to bed late and quite tired, so I couldn't think of anything related to lucid dreaming, which just made me fall asleep. I only remember now short fragments of my dreams:

1. Me staying in my classroom. About half of my class was there, along with a brother of an old friend of mine and an old classmate of mine, both of which weren't supposed to be there. The desks were arranged in a weird manner and they seemed to have round edges (while in reality they are just rectangular benches). A classmate of mine was sitting in my seat and he told me that about half the class wanted to go on a specific trip, but I knew that was untrue because most of them felt forced to go, being afraid of the teachers.

2. I was walking with my girlfriend, and we were going towards some sort of family party (with my family). As we were almost there, my phone rang, and it was my girlfriend. It felt really strange that she was right next to me, and I was also talking on the phone with her (the person near me wasn't actually talking on the phone, so basically I was interacting with some clones or something), and I was wondering whether she was jealous because I talked to this clone of hers at the same time.
When we got there I saw an older person whom I don't know that was really drunk and he said he was just "enjoying the moment while it lasted". I felt quite embarassed.

3. The next thing I know I was in some sort of ghetto-ish area. It was very dimly lit, quite dirty, and there was really no one around. It slightly resembled something you can see in a Fallout game. I realised that something was wrong,and that I had no idea how I gotten there, so I told myself I must have been dreaming. I looked at my arm and two of my fingers were flashing (appearing and disappearing). I realised it was a dream, and I knew that the first thing I had to do was calm myself down and stabilize. Still, I had absolutely NO control on it, and my body started flying upwards. As I saw the whole area under me, the lights became really brighter and I woke up (in paralysis, seeing a skeleton sitting on top of me. More on this here.

After I got out of paralysis, I turned around in my bed and went to sleep again, hoping I would sleep quietly until morning.
The next thing I know, I'm somewhere in my town, close to a shopping mall and I spontaneously realise that I'm dreaming. I hold my nose and I can easily breathe through it, and once again I know that I HAVE to stabilize and calm down, but my body instantly starts flying upwards. The lights get too bright, I blink repeatedly in my dream and wake up (not paralyzed, this time).

This exact dream happens again two more times, each time in a different area of my town, and with a different RC in them. In my first one I somewhere in my neighbourhood, and I looked at my hand and saw 6 fingers, so I knew I was dreaming. Instantly, the same thing happened again, I flied upwards and woke up.

Then, for the third time, I get a very similar dream (in another part of town, close to a school). This time I see my fingers flashing again, I get lucid, start flying,and wake up.

I really hope I'll be able to control everything better from now on...

I am really frustrated with my dream recall right now.
I'm not even stressed or anything, which would explain the lack of recall.
Usually when I get adequate sleep, do the occasional wbtb, and try to remember my dreams when I wake up, my dream recall gets pretty decent.
When I'm doing well I often remember 5 or more dreams per night.


Looking at my recent dj notes though:

17.03.2012
No recall.

18.03.2012
No recall.

19.03.2012
No recall.

20.03.2012
No recall.

21.03.2012
No recall.

22.03.2012
In the U.S. walking through a pet shop. I find bearded dragons which I like.
One of them has a really strong green skin color, must be a rare mutation.
I then spot at least 15 pairs of eyes on him. Huh? How weird.

23.03.2012
No recall.

24.03.2012
No recall.

25.03.2012
No recall.

26.03.2012
I hear my father coming into my room to wake me up whilst still dreaming.
I cannot recall the dream though, only that I heard him come in...

Brain, why u no recall dreams? >_<

I stopped doing DJ entries on this site about six months ago now. I came back to a DJ so horribly Disorganized and poorly written that the only real option seems to be to just clean this out and start a new account. I will replace all of the DJ entries with "deleted" But don't worry I'm copying them into a folder on my hard drive.

Some might say it's good to have a messy dream journal, but I personally don't like how any of these dreams were worded or came out. I categorized this as "side notes" because it mostly has to do more with my movement to another account than lucid dreaming at all.

DV site itself only does a soft delete. I really want these off the web completely.

So I will be coming back to this site very soon on a new account. I really like this DJ system. ;)

3/18/12
I dream I am driving home from some sort of event. I can't recall the event, I just remember being in a large warehouse-like place. I left, and then entered my Dad's car, who was apparently home already. My brother sits in the passenger seat, and I take the driver's seat. I start the car, and drive off. As I drive, I dream like a total numbskull. I drive through yards, off road, on sidewalks, and I recall running over a wooden fence. When we get home, my brother is tattling to my Dad about my terrible driving. The two of them leave now. I become lucid. However it's very very vivid. A friend of mine came over, and that's all I remember.*

NOTE: I don't quite remember where the dream started, or ended, but I recall this one part of it.

I dream I'm sitting in the back of a black van with some friends(not people I know in waking life though). It's a nice sunny day outside, just like most of my dreams. We're driving through an urban place, and we come to a four way intersection. On the sidewalk to my left, there's a man, who pulls out a gun. He shoots another man, who goes down. I'm staring at the scene in shock. Another man comes up to the shooter to stop him, but he is also shot. A man who walks by is also shot. I'm now scared, because I believe he may open fire on the van I'm in. The police now show up, to the right of the van. They have multiple cars, and make a blockade. The shooter opens fire on them, but he is a bit unsuccessful. The police wait for him to run out of ammo, then they rush over and arrest him.

That's all I remember.

A black panther was growling behind / under / beside my bed. He was very close and very angry. I was just waiting for him to attack.

In my dream, I was in bed and had been sleeping. I was now trying to open my eyes, but I couldn't.

Then, the panther was a cat. I still couldn't open my eyes, but the growling was now the purring of a cat. I could feel it's cool breath on my face.

I think there is some connection with FA's and becoming lucid. I felt close to lucidity in this dream, and I considered this an FA. I'll keep tabs on it.

March 7, 2012
I didn't write this dream down right away so I'm just going to summarize

The first part of the dream is extremely fuzzy. All I can remember is the fact that I faked my own death.

During the second part I am at this large football field. Off to the side are some tables. I, and a few others, are wearing party party hats and other party attire, most likely for a birthday. I remember gloating to them about how my parents thought I was dead

I then see some girl on the football field being a bully to someone else. I feel enraged and have a strong urge to beat her up, so I follow her. After a short while I manage to get near enough to punch her, and I stop when she is knocked out. After that I was all excited and proud.

The dream is fuzzy after that but I can recall flames and disaster as well as the fact that I was over 100 years old :/

I was a busy girl this night! Four MILDs, one almost V-WILD, and one non-lucid, not to mention some shadow creatures at the beginning of the night. Intense!

Side Notes - So, as I was falling asleep there was suddenly some very vivid and weird blobby structure textured like blue jeans behind my eyelids, it twitched and morphed very quickly. This was not hypnagogic imagery (at least, not fully), it was a remnant of when I used to meditate while abusing anticholinergic deliriants, it moved in the exact same way. I open my eyes and say "Great, so I'm hallucinating now." There were dark clouds moving across my room and coming up to my face, I could feel an animal presence in each one, but I didn't allow them to form into anything. Across my ceiling moved a cloud that I always recognize as one of my delirium signs. Had I let it grow, it would've turned into a big white alien crab thing. I decided to just close my eyes and try to fall asleep quickly anyway while repeating my lucidity mantra.

#1 - Playing With The Weather [MILD]

The first few parts of this dream I only remember in flashes. I remember wishing some city was closer to us for some reason, I think I perceived it as some cool party area, then blur... then there's some spaceship ride at a theater or old house or something where we weren't supposed to be, but I got on the ride with a couple other people and it sent me into third-person mode in outer space, controlling some ship (a star destroyer from Star Wars, maybe?) as some commercial about it plays in the background (just the audio) and the ship gets continuously divided into smaller copies of itself by other ships around it. I think this phase is what caused me to become lucid... suddenly I was back in first-person and standing in front of my house. A big red bus was driving down the street and I tried to pull it toward me with telekinesis but it didn't work, probably too big of a task for a beginner. (I don't think I've used telekinesis since my second lucid ever.) So instead I lept up and blasted off into the sky at supersonic speeds, the wind felt so amazing rushing past my face. I even got to feel myself pass through clouds, which was awesome! I watched the ground streak by until I stopped over some really big field in a country area with one or two small farms. I was really high up, above the clouds, and I saw a tornado tearing through the countryside. (Though, aside from a couple storm clouds, it was bright and sunny outside. ) I gave my telekinesis another shot and managed to change its path by holding my hand out and pushing it in a different direction. Next I turned my attention to a storm cloud next to me and tried to make lightning strike the ground from it, but it wasn't really working too well, it was more like a mild flash that was just a glitch in my perception. I guess that one might take some waking life visualization first to do well. After that I transitioned into third-person again and lost lucidity, there was some kid breaking into a bank and some nasty old man with a shotgun (I think...) and his dog comes in and threatens him to leave and return what he stole or he's going to call this other old man and make him his pet. I woke up after that. There was a lot of dream leading up to the blurry part too, I remember experiencing it, just not what it was.... Though I do remember it involved Erii.

#2 - Outmatched [MILD]

I was back in middle school but in a class with a guy I didn't meet until high school, and the environment was somewhat fused with my community college. I have two electric guitars made of rubber, and they really work but they also aren't stable and bend and flop around a lot. Apparently one of them is broken and the other is a replica of the broken one, and my teacher gets mad at me for having them so I ask if I can take them to a different classroom. She says sure, so I get up and start walking through the halls and swing them like crazy on my way, they bend so much that they made that *wop-wop-wop* spinning blade sound but with a cool little electric guitar noise. While walking through the hall I become lucid, and somehow I went from the second floor to the first floor. I look up a massive staircase and see someone who I don't remember, but I flew up to him and asked him where Mason was. (This guy I had a class with in high school, I don't know why I thought of him but I was basically just trying to keep a dream plot going.) He didn't know so I flew off to the cafeteria (first floor) and there were several rows of tables with computers set up there for some reason. I just had fun walking through the rows and seeing tons of old people I went to middle school with, including D and C, working on some projects. I walked to one of the stairwells and sat down next to it and pulled out my phone to start texting (I think I almost lost lucidity here), and O walked by me and said that I'd better be careful because he had just gotten in trouble for doing that, and I was like oh snap, I'm supposed to be in class! I walk up the stairs next to these two random DC girls and tell them about the guitars and they laugh, and I'm like "I know, fuckin' dreams." Upstairs we walk to a section where there's a large gap in between two sections of the floor that you can see the first floor through, with a bridge off to the right of where I am. Directly across from me is a room with a bunch of people standing out front, so I jump across the gap myself and walk into the room. It's small and nearly empty, with another even smaller room (like closet-sized) connected to the side of it. There's a random girl standing next to the window looking out of it, and she looks over at me. Suddenly she runs over to me at LIGHTNING speed, like leaving a blurry trail behind her and everything, and stands right in front of me with this serious face. I freak out and try to kick her away, but with her super speed she just jumps to right behind my foot. She just stares at me and then reaches out to grab my leg. O_O And I'm basically terrified at this point, but then I wake up.

I need to master that level of super speed as a power!!

#3 - Walking On Water [MILD]

O and I are leaving our middle school to go to In-N-Out for lunch but we accidentally use an exit door that has an alarm on it. I figured this out after we used it but O didn't, so I just wanted to get out of there so I don't get in trouble. We almost left, but O started seeing everyones' reactions to the alarm going off and starts having a panic attack, so I put aside my worries to keep him calm. It jumps forward to me right up next to some window blinds, like literally they're all I see, with individual ones having information printed on them about how I have to sit in this timeout class all day for being in trouble, and it specifically stated that one of the school admins was ninja9578. Eventually I back away from the blinds and see that this class is in a tiny building in front of the school, in the parking lot. This one guy in somewhat fancy black clothes is there and asks me what I'm there for after talking to the teacher about something, but I became lucid around this point. I just tell him I'm getting out of there, and I fly up and phase through the wall and into the sky. I look back and see him smiling and looking encouragingly at me, and he says "This is a dream!" or something like that, and I just smile at him and fly off. I start off down the road toward my house, but then I decided to ground myself and hoof it this time to make sure I didn't get too much of an adrenaline rush. I run down the path, and normally there's a bridge and on the left side of it you see my old elementary school, but instead this time right at the edge of the bridge was a beach with a long stretch of water going out from it. :O I decided that walking on water would be a cool thing to do, so I just ran out on to it. There are waves forming and breaking beneath me and it feels so cool, I try to jump over the waves as they come just for the fun of it. That went on for a short amount of time, then the dream ended.

False Awakening - I had a false awakening here where I intended to start writing that dream down, but it wasn't really significant. Luckily it didn't mess with my memory of it, but it did make me think I had woken up between the alarm part and the getting in trouble briefly when I actually hadn't.

#4 - Sleepwalking Scare [MILD]

I was briefly lucid, I can't remember much other than that the plot of the dream seemed really unstable and ill-formed, like the DCs were actually invisible. They were definitely there in a third eye kind of way, but they vanished easily, and I was afraid that I was actually lucid sleepwalking or something because I was standing naked in my bathroom, and if I closed my eyes and walked around I felt myself moving and all, but when I would open them I'd still be in the same spot. However, when I actually woke up I was still in bed.

Side Notes - After this I wasn't really intending to fall back asleep, but I didn't feel like getting up either. I stayed in bed and started thinking about giving myself a breast massage, but I was so lazy that I didn't even actually feel like lifting my arms to do it, so I started visualizing it instead. To my surprise, the visualization was incredibly strong, and I felt like it was actually happening. A scene started forming around me too, I was walking Target and looking at DVDs while doing this. It definitely felt like it was about to completely take over and suck me into a V-WILD several times, but it was never able to fully do it. Maybe if I'd done this method before I would've known how to push it all the way, but as it is I just don't think I was tired enough to fall into it. After I gave up with that it took me another fifteen or twenty minutes to fall asleep again.

#5 - Chao Raising [Non-Lucid]

I was raising chao (from Sonic Adventure) with K, and then my memory gets blurry.... I wrote down "find a way back to the beginning of an obstacle course which takes me back to the beginning of it all and causes me to hatch from one of his eggs?" I remember before this he was at my house writing a trip report for some cannabinoid smoking blend we had both tried, and then he was leaving but I said I wanted to go with him and he said I needed to hurry, so I went to change clothes and somehow it launched into that. Afterwards he asked me what I was going to do with the new chao and I told him I might go for one beauty-based (?) because until then I'd been looking at Erii as the figure of beauty. (??) Then I woke up lol.

Still not much luck with recalling the dreams. However there is something I remember very well. Yesterday I emptied the trash but didn’t replace the bag. I remember seeing it replaced in a dream. In the dream I notice the bag and think that somebody else must have replaced it. In the morning I noticed that nobody had.

So, I tried taking 1500 mg of aniracetam at midnight to see the effect it would have on my dreams. My advice would be that if you are sensitive to hallucinogenic states of mind (like I am) and/or have a history of panic attacks and general anxiety (like I do), that you DO NOT try this. In my previous experiences using aniracetam as a nootropic, I had noticed that it seemed kind of like piracetam but a bit more trippy, it just has sort of a dissociative energy to it. Now I know that I shouldn't take more than a standard dose (750 mg) or possibly even that if I'm not willing to deal with that. :T

Basically, as it was setting in, my thoughts started racing. I also realized that it may not be good to take a good dose of something that pushes a lot of oxygen to the brain while trying to go to sleep, but that's my bad. I was zoned out and into a mild hypnagogic trance (I get very light, transparent hallucinations easily) when suddenly the weird patterns I was watching became really strong and pushed me into alertness. I sat up thinking "Okay, that was odd. >_>" After that there was an abrupt shift in consciousness, I honestly did a RC to make sure I wasn't dreaming. It didn't really feel like a dream though, more like a trip. In the same way that hypnagogia can involve things like loud noises or images that appear really quick and then vanish in a way that makes them immediately feel really distant, I started getting sensations of chest pains that would last barely a second, then feel like they almost never happened in the first place, and I started to hear my heart beating and it sounded somewhat erratic. Though I've never had it quite as fleeting as this before, I've been here a million times... the point where I have to suddenly get myself under control or I'm going to launch into a panic attack.

I forced myself to get a grip, and started doing some of my normal calming exercises. The anxiety and sensations didn't fully go away, but it didn't make me totally freak out or anything. I frequently was getting the unsettlingly strong dissociative feeling of having all of my senses pulled away from me, like I was about to snap into an anesthetic OBE, but this also came and went pretty quickly. It took me a long time to fall asleep after that, and I think I had one dream before the first one I logged but I can't really recall anything about it. However, all of my dreams after that were considerably more vivid than they had been the past few days, or even really more than any dreams I'd had in a while.

I'd always wondered about the supposed 5-HT2A and D2/D3 action of aniracetam. I'm still not sure if they've verified it yet, but I'm more willing to believe it interacts with those receptors in some way now. It was a lot crazier than I expected.... I know people take doses much higher than that normally and are fine, too. I guess I'm just really sensitive to its effects. If I try it again in the future, I'll probably stick to the 750 mg doses, and probably a couple hours before bed. It does seem to have an augmentative effect, but it needs to be used correctly.

Anyway....

#1 - Meeting Up With Laura [Non-Lucid]

I was hanging out with this guy J I met in high school but haven't seen much of since graduation, and I was supposed to be meeting up with some girl I don't know named Laura soon. I asked J if he wanted to go to her house with me and he said sure. This part of the dream is hazy, but we got in my car and I drove us there, and somewhere down the line J turned into D. We got to her house, but she wasn't there! Her parents and my parents were, though. They were having some kind of breakfast feast with a bunch of pans on the stove that included hash browns, eggs, and mini pancakes, possibly among other things. I went into Laura's room and gave her a call on my cell (I think) and it turned out she had actually gone to my house looking for me, so I felt bad about missing her. :T I told her we'd go bowling to make up for it when I got back. I saw her as I was talking to her, but she's hard to remember. At this point my mind started associating her with Laura Palmer, from Twin Peaks, and she was blonde like her but she didn't really look like her otherwise. I thought to myself maybe we can bring some drugs or alcohol to the bowling alley to surprise her, that'll make her happy. After I got off the phone I went back and saw D pigging out on all the breakfast food. I told him we needed to head out and that he should make those pancakes he was getting be his last plate, and he said "Even worse, I think they're Chinese." and laughed. At the time, I knew what this meant.... It was some reference to the way they were cooked. I have no idea what it means now, though. After that, we were getting ready to leave and I woke up.

#2 - Talking About Disgaea [Non-Lucid]

I spent the night at someone's house talking about drugs or something, then in the morning when I woke up and walked out the front door (into a big auditorium-like building, on the second floor ) there was a huge band/orchestra event going on, so I wanted to get out of there quickly. I distinctly remember walking past this chibified version of another J I knew in school, and he even had a squeaky voice to go along with his look. I ran into an old friend (some random DC?) and the scene changes to a huge department store, and she gets mad at me for not forcing her to play Disgaea before when she thought she wouldn't like it because she said she finally decided to try it after all these years and loves it. She asks for some teaser details about what she can expect out of the game, so I gave some vague information about the plot and some cool stuff you can do in the game, which were amazingly accurate considering I was saying this in a dream, but then the dream ended.

#3 - Glitchy New Pokémon Game [Non-Lucid]

Playing a copy of an unreleased Pokémon game that I somehow downloaded on to a flash cart. (Even in the dream I admit to not remembering how I got it.) I refer to the game as Black version, but I think I might have meant Black 2. It looks cool, but because it's a dream it's extremely glitchy and not consistent at all. Yet somehow, I managed to realize that if you keep going back and retrying the options you were pressing over and over again intending them to work, they eventually would. I don't remember much about the content, though I was actually able to read everything perfectly fine, and I remember seeing a picture of Link (in child form) from his art in Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time. Meanwhile, my parents are also walking around the house (I'm moving around while playing) and arguing about whether or not someone will be able to fix some issue if my dad contacts her, but I can't remember exactly what.

I'm going to start a dream journal!

Sometimes I hate living with 2 people. They always get up early. My partner either moves or shifts position or an alarm goes off. It's really disruptive to my dreaming. Thankfully both of them had to leave early today and I was by myself for most of the morning and I was still tired enough to go back to sleep.

I am with Ashley and a group of random friends I don't know. We are going out to a club. When we get there it reminds me of one of the "open-minded" clubs that I go to where I live, where all sexual orientations and a wide range of flavors of people go - Everyone from goths to punk-kids. We go to the second floor. My sister hands me a beer. I down it pretty quickly, and then someone else gives me a cocktail (rum and coke) that I also suck down.Surprisingly I actually feel quite drunk in the dream after that - so much so that I feel like I need to sit down. I stupidly end up sitting at the edge of the stairs with my legs sticking out. A girl comes around the corner and then trips over my feet. She lands on a group of people who are also heading downstairs and they all tumble over. The girl I tripped gets up and comes over to me quickly.

"Don't worry it's not your fault. It's really theirs for not knowing how to prevent themselves from falling," she says.

(Wow, my subconscious really does try to shift the blame!) Another girl who fell that was with the group of people also walks up to me.

"Nice job," she looks angry, "Idiot!"

I don't say anything to her, I just walk over to a fire-pole, and slide down to the first floor. I hear her call my name as she throws something down at me. It hits me in the head. Before I can look to see what it is the dream ends and I am awake.

I turn over....annoyed that I didn't become lucid. I figure this is a good time to try WBTB. I close my eyes and concentrate.

Suddenly I am back in the club. I hear this really cool music. It sounds like a punk girl band. I am pretty impressed that my mind can make this stuff up. Then the dream fades again.

I am back in my bed and I decide I have to do it again.
This time it's harder though. I close my eyes and I can feel my head coming out of my body. Everything is black but I can feel the process. First my head, then my arms. I basically feel like I climb out of my real body. I try to concentrate on going back to the cave where I met that mysterious DC who knew about lucid dreaming. It doesn't quite work. The dream scene appears and I am in a nice village with lots of small streams and ponds. I start flying. For some reason I feel like the cave would be located next to the ocean. But there is no ocean around..and I wake up again.

Even though the dream was kind of boring. It was my first WBTB so I note it as a big achievement and had to post it on here.

"Destiny" is a recurring dream scenario.
It is the name of the first faster than light spaceship, on a controversial mission to investigate a signal that can only be of alien origin.
Here's a summary of current events:
Recurring dream about a spaceship mission to find extraterrestrial life. - Dream Journals - Lucid Dreaming - Dream Views

I have had a few more dreams about Destiny, but none of them drove the plot further.
I always find myself in the cockpit starting at instruments, but nothing ever happens.
Tonight something did happen.


We're all strapped tightly into our seats.
It is time.
A female computer voice is counting down to zero.
Once the countdown runs out we will begin the breaking maneuver to get out of ftl.
It will last approximately 20 minutes, which will most likely be rather unpleasant.
The artificial gravity system will compensate most of the g-forces, but if the acceleration maneuver was any indication
then there will be a considerable amount of vibrations.

My assumptions weren't off.
The first few minutes of deceleration weren't too bad, If I had to venture I guess I'd estimate that we are experiencing about 2 g's right now.
However, after more than 10 minutes, this gets tiring and stressful.
The skin on your face feels like it is trying to peel itself off.
And that's the time when the vibrations start.

The hyperdrive is designed to operate at a specific speed, and it turns out that it does so surprisingly well.
However during the acceleration and deceleration phase, when the ship is still at ftl but far below the optimal operation speed,
saying that it is running sloppy would be putting it mildly.
Imagine an old car engine with a rough idle and a piston not firing properly.
Now imagine that engine having enough power to propel 400 tons with ease.

It's not just the vibrations, it's being shaken around what really wears you down.
The noise of the ftl drive is phenomenal though.
It is the sound of raw power; The sound of a thousand lions roaring over the echo of a thunderstorm.

I can barely appreciate the view. My eyes are focused on the main console, expecting a warning light to go off any second.
I miss most of the spectacle right in front of me. Slowing down to the speed of light, the view gradually shifts through the color spectrum, producing all sorts of fractal patterns.
But no alarm goes off. No warning light. Not even a check light.
As we drop below the speed of light, we are shortly blinded by a flash of light.

The vibrations and the g-forces gradually decrease.
We are back in normal space, coming to a stop.
Finally! Those 20 minutes felt like an eternity.

"Initiating hyperdrive cool down phase."
"Hyperdrive will be available in approximately 20 hours."

We'd better hope so.
Without the hyperdrive it would take a few thousand years to get back home.
It is safe to say that without it, we are screwed.

Everyone's pretty nervous. Nobody knew what to expect, but we were all expecting something.
We find ourselves not too far from a blue gas giant.
It doesn't seem to have any moons.
I find this a bit disappointing though I have no idea what I had in mind.
An inhabited planet? That would have been a bit ridiculous I guess.

But then a vague beep catches my attention.
The most important beep I will ever hear in my entire life.
The HUD highlights a location close to the gas station and has it marked as "UNK_00000"
UNK stands for unknown artificial object.
Non-artificial objects are marked with AST for asteroid instead.
UNK can be anything from an unofficial or military satellite to space debris.
But this time it is none of those.

It is in fact an alien space station orbiting the gas giant.
This is the only time where calling something alien is not premature.
Who else could have built an artificial structure orbiting a planet hundreds of light years away from earth?
We plot an interception course and point all of our sensors at the structures.

Catching up with the planet doesn't take very long, but synchronizing the orbit is a more time consuming task.
You can't just point the ship into the general direction of the space station and hit the throttle.
If you go too slow you get caught by the gravity of the planet, if you go too fast your orbit becomes elliptic.

The wait is painful. There are so many questions.
Is there anyone there? If so, how are we going to communicate? How will we make contact? ...

... We sit in front of the station for a prolonged period of time, trying to find out all sorts of things with the on-board scanning devices.
The station has begun to light a path towards what appears to be some sort of hangar bay.
It is clearly inviting us in...

... We have landed inside of the hangar, which surprisingly seems to be pressurized.
There must be some sort of force field in place keeping the air inside.
The air mixture is mostly nitrogen / oxygen... just like on earth.
A single hallway leads out of the hangar.
It is again lit by lights inviting us to step inside...

... I am walking through the corridor in a pressure suit, accompanied by our language and culture specialist.
We're not wearing the suits because the air isn't breathable, we're just afraid that if we do encounter any other living organism in here,
we might be contaminated by potentially dangerous bacteria.
The atmospheric scanners on the ship found the air to be sterile though...

... We enter a big, well lit room.
It is divided into two by a transparent wall...

... We are not alone ...

On the other side of the wall, a humanoid being is waiting.
I become so incredibly nervous that the feeling becomes so intense that I can no longer feel it.
I just walk forward.
Thousands of questions answered within a split second.
Are we alone? Is there other intelligent life?
But those are immediately replaced by an identical amount of new questions.
Why would other intelligent life be humanoid? Why do they look so similar?
The odds for that are so insanely low.
Anyone who knows the basics of evolution would tell you that the likelihood of extraterrestrial life being similar to us is so low it is ridiculous.

Yet here I am, approaching this woman who looks more similar to humans with every step I take.
Eyes, eyebrows, a nose, a mouth, teeth, ears, two hands with 5 fingers each, thumbs.
Her hair is very different, it looks very organic, almost plantlike.
Her skin texture is also slightly different, but the only thing that is really obvious at first glance are her hair and her clothes.

She smiles.
I am so close now.
I look into her eyes, without any plans on what to do.
I just follow my curiosity.

Her eyes... they remind me of something.
They are so vivid. So detailed.
I need to see them more clearly.

I unlock my helmet and take it off.
I don't worry about the consequences, I don't even think of them.
I have to see.

I approach the transparent wall until I am nearly touching it with my face.
I take of my right gauntlet and press my hand against the wall.
She does the same with her left hand.
Our hands would be touching if there was no wall separating us now.

I can now see her eyes clearly.
I know those eyes.
Those eyes so vibrant and colorful that they defy the capabilities of human vision.
Those eyes with an unlimited amount of detail.
The deeper you stare into them, the more details you can see.
It would be so easy to get lost in them.

I have only met three woman with such eyes in my life.
One is Yuya, another is the "hibiscus girl". http://www.dreamviews.org/blogs/hyu/...verload-23438/

The last is a mysterious woman from the future. A "twinner" as MoSh would say... http://www.dreamviews.org/blogs/hyu/...s-women-15610/

Is is her...
Those eyes I wouldn't forget in a million years. They are so unique and the memory of them so powerful.
It is her, in the form of an extraterrestrial being.


This leads me to the obvious and only possible conclusion.
I am dreaming.
This is a dream.

I am not sure whether to be sad or amazed about this.
I feel both, so strong that I cannot distinguish between them.

She whispers something, but her voice cannot penetrate the wall.
My desire to know what she said is so incredibly strong I can only barely bear it.

The wall slides away and she hugs me tightly.
I am so confused, so full of joy, so ultimately sad.
My hands are shaking, I can barely stand. I have no control over my body.
She whispers in my hear with the most gentle voice I have ever heard:

"Soon"

The dream fades away.

I wake up still full of confusing emotions.
I can't decide whether I am overwhelmed by this amazing experience or by the sadness of the feeling that this "story" might have come to an end.
I think "This is why I dream"

Feels good to be back, expect some crazy dreams very soon. Will update with every new dream

Regular dreams will be posted in BLACK
Moments of lucidity will be highlighted in BLUE
Achieved goals will be marked with RED

DREAM GOALS
[] Fly
[] Jump extremely high
[] Hang out with someone famous
[] Hang out with Tyler Durden
[] Commit a robbery
[] Drive a car
[] Smoke weed
[] Visit my hometown
[] Breathe underwater
[] Exit one dream and create a brand new one
[] Create a portal
[] Play with my childhood dogs