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Dream recall from today's nap, haven't had intense entry into WILD like that before, haha, fits that i recently had talk in chat about not experiencing much vibrations.

I am in my bed, after a while everything starts shaking and i have dream feeling, i just go with it and shaking becomes even more intense, like an earthquake, so intense that it throws me into air and almost off the bed, making me open eyes. I take control of the situation and stop them. I am in my room, looks pretty close to my room in waking life. I go to balcony, rub hands and jump off, i feel wings and start the flight, i look around and notice that i can actually see base of my wings this time, i easily change color of them a few times, stopping at black. Then i fly near some building and about to go with summoning, but dream fades out and i wake up.

To bed at 11pm, Woke up around 5:50am

In this dream I was in an elevator. The door opened and an attractive thin, tall, blond, young caucasian woman stepped in. I asked her "Going Up?" She: "Does not matter." And she stepped to the side of the elevator where there was a spacious card table and several chairs lined up, and she started shuffling a deck of cards, setting up for a poker game. This did not phase me - I was not questioning things yet. Apparently my mind has no problem with poker games in the elevator.

Then I looked at the elevator buttons to make sure my floor was pressed. The floor I wanted was 6, which is where my office is at in reall life. The woman had pressed 10 (though she had stated it did not matter, and clearly intended to just stay in the elevator to play poker).

Suddenly I noticed that the elevator button numbers were out of order. I decided to do a reality check, to look away and look back and see if the numbers change. Out of some reason the reality check was not working properly, but I thought to myself, "Skrew that, I don't need a reality check to confirm this is a dream. I know this is a dream." When I thought that, the numbers rearranged themselves (though I have a sense they were still out of order, but in a different way). The dream started fading. The vividness was low, and I did not have the presence of mind to fight it, to stabilize.

When I woke up, I tried falling right back to sleep in a DEILD, but was not successful, and I remembered several dreams from earlier that night, and had an urge to write them down - I had not written them down yet. I remembered to reality check only after I wrote them down, but yes, I am awake.

Earlier Dream 1: Learning Hebrew - under 21 need an escort In this dream I was at the Jewish Community Center, and I was supposed to learn the phrase in Hebrew that I am under 21 and thus need an escort into the building. Dream did not explain why I needed to learn this phrase though I am not under 21, 20 year olds don't need escorts, and the people at the JCC understand English of course. But I did not question any of that. In my dream the phrase was supposedly in Hebrew, but in hindsight it was more like Spanish, and I understood most of it. However, out of some reason I said "This is too hard for me. Luckily my learning this phrase is just optional." My older son was with me, while I was learning this phrase. We were in the lobby of the JCC. My older son was going to go back to his school, and someone at the JCC reminded him to bring back a bottled drink for his teacher from the cafeteria, which in my dream was something he regularly did.

Earlier Dream 2: Room Size Aquarium, Fish with Issues, Running out of Water In this dream I was looking at our aquarium which in the dream was room sized (in reality it is 29 gallons). I noticed that some fish were made out of paper but swimming, some had their tails bitten off, and some were mostly eaten, but all were still swimming. I was concerned about a guppy with tail bitten off because I knew that that guppy had been ok the previous day (I actually have this guppy and he is ok). I went around the corner to another ventage point on the room sized aquarium, and there the aquarium was almost out of water. I realized it was my responsibility to refill it somehow.

Earlier Dream 3: Failed to Attend Work Paid Training While Out of Town In this dream I was out of town for three one day long IT courses, a training that had been paid for by my work, and somehow I managed to fail to attend any of the courses. I was worried about that, because I did not want to waste my company's money and they had paid for the training. I wondered whether I could make up the courses at m\home, and pretend to my company that I had taken them while out of town.

Yep. fell asleep while reconstructing my 3rd remembered dream last night and only just discovered my journal is minus that one...and I can't remember it now. None were vivid or long...despite taking 100gms of B6 (my second try with B6)
I'm giving up on an alarm. My fumbling with it just disperses any dream I might have had. I need to self condition to wake naturally
I tried WILDing again on my sofa. Same feeling of deadness...same feeling of almost getting there...of course, it could be wishful thinking. I'll keep trying. The prospect of HI etc doesn't scare me...so i don't know why I'm not yet crossing the threshold.

Sleep Pattern:

Timings:
Time Awake - 12:00-02:30
Lights Out - 02:30
Sleep - ~3:00

No attempts or methods, just trying to fall asleep.

First Recalled Awakening ~ 9:00

Don't fully remember, but I think I woke up. I really need to start writing these posts as I get up instead of getting to sleep...

Next Recalled Awakening - ~11:00
Last Recalled Awakening - ~11:45
Up - 12:00

Modifiers the Day Before:
-DnD.

Modifiers Going to Sleep:
-Still sick...
-Computer and phone...

Modifiers Getting Up:
-Alarm at 12:00

Dreams:
1) Semi-lucid. I am being recruited into an army in a non-our world. I am aware that this is a dream, but still don't question the story and follow along. I packed a bag but forgot clothes, so I go back to get some. In the meantime, I come across my DCs scrambling around backstage, out of character. (I remember the implication of them being out of the roles they were supposed to, as I apologized to them for messing up the routine).

-Time Skip-

A girl from my high school is next to me in a movie theater, and I put my arm around her. She seems surprised, though not unhappy. Still semi-lucid.

2) Driving down a highway I have never been down before, having a bit of trouble making all the lane changes and turns, realize it is a dream. Pull the wheel up and the car flies vertically.

I was riding in an elevator. I was then in a room talking to this girl acquaintance who's about to go to prom. She was wearing a badge around her neck, it was "red leaf" in Chinese. It's a restaurant name, and I asked her why she was wearing it. She told me that everyone went to that restaurant as dinner before prom. I stood in the room, looking at the other side of the room where people were eating. I was then dancing with PW, we were just twirling around the room holding hands. I asked her why we didn't have something fun like that last year. She said there was, but we didn't go because she didn't want our relationship to get any further. I was then sitting at a table, talking to other people, talking about something else.

First WILD
I woke myself up four hours after resting to attempt a WILD. For the most part, it worked, as I slowly felt paralysis overcome me. Thereafter, sounds of static enveloped my hearing. Finally, I began seeing the sound, if that makes any sense. It was as though a spectrogram was hooked up to my vision, yet in all of this I still couldn't move.

So I sat here in static land, vaguely aware of my body just waiting. I obviously wasn't thinking because rather than engage my sense of feeling and try and actually move my dreambody, I decided to take myself out of paralysis. If its anything that this WILD taught me, it's patience and that I should always attempt to think my decisions out.

Second WILD
After I got out of paralysis, I figured I might as well try another WILD after thinking over the last one and began relaxing myself back into it. This one had more waiting to it, as I just laid there. This time, sleep paralysis didn't come around, and there was a momentary blackout period that I went through. At this point, I must had fallen asleep, due to this large, square game board with buildings on it.

I was still waiting for sleep paralysis to roll around as I watched (and did not question) these two entities play on the board. Judging by the conversation going back and forth, it was a father and his son playing a game on it, as they had no body. The game consisted of throwing a large ball at the right buildings to do as much damage as possible. The father taunted his son for he had the highest score as his son tried to beat him.

But then I heard a new voice, that sounded muffled, like as though it were coming from a walkie-talkie. I somehow developed a body and flew underneath the board as the voice started guiding through relaxation and sleep paralysis. My vision shifted back to a first-person perspective. It was then that I once again felt and heard vibrations. A tunnel developed, and the voice cautioned that I should stay calm. Breathing perfectly and right as I was about to travel through it, the most peculiar thing happened.

In an instant, my chest felt like it dropped as I was no longer in control of my breathing, and from my toes all the way up to my head, a quick wave traveled in me. Simultaneously, I heard a deep, roaring sound that can only be described as the crackling heard after lightning. But all this happened because I woke up. It's like when you're dreaming and someone suddenly shakes you out of it. Disappointed that the WILD failed, I decided to just try and get some sleep.

Short Semi-Lucid
I don't know how it happened, but after falling asleep I found myself in a pitch black area. I knew something was up and came to the conclusion I was dreaming. So I decided to do a few things. First on the list was to create a spaceship. I turned around and saw only part of this huge behemoth I created. It was clear, too clear. I could see every detail in it and if I kept looking at it I thought I'd go mad. But when I averted my gaze, I found myself in the rings of what had to have been Saturn. Huge asteroids began flying towards me, and rather than stabilizing my dream, I woke up. It was all very brief and probably only lasted around thirty seconds.

Defending the City
Once again, falling asleep, I dreamt I was in large metropolis of some sorts. I was on the roof of a high-rise surround by other, taller buildings. The technology and architecture looked like it was in the future, with computers and holographic displays. Judging by the large amounts of people, there was a celebration going on. Two people, a hefty guy who looked like he was in the military and a shorter, younger guy with his hair up in a ponytail stood out among the crowd. I was chatting with them when out of nowhere an earthquake shakes the entire place. After it ended, a few people gasped as they looked out onto the ocean off in the distance. Some Lovecraftian horror began shambling forth. It was indescribable, yet I felt no fear.

I know that the two guys and I had fought it, but I have no recollection of the weapons we used. Apparently, every week some creature either emerges from the sea or flies down to terrorize the city. Why that was, was not known. "Weeks" in my dream passed like minutes, as we fought more and more of the huge creatures. The last one came once again from the sea. It swam around the docks before morphing into a gigantic, destructive 'thing'. But once we killed it, there were no more.

I went to the intelligence department of the city where everything was recorded and archived and pulled up the footage of the last creature. It had spoken about why it was attacking the city though I vaguely remember the message. It had something to do with the expansion of the metropolis.

Through a Portal
After I heard the audio clip, my dream began to develop more surreal qualities about it. I went through some portal and watched a few medieval peasants build a village, then, out of nowhere, I was stopped by a dentist and told my wisdom teeth are coming through. I felt the back part of my gums with my tongue and confirmed that I indeed needed to get them removed. It was there that my dream ended.

Whoa! I had another Lucid Dream! Wait.. better do a Reality Check.... counts fingers, tugs on pointer finger... Ok I'm really awake this time.

Saturday, June 8th, 2013
Well, after sleeping for 5 hours, waking up and going back to sleep... nothing. Slept soundly for another couple of hours, woke up, went back to bed but I didn't go to sleep right away, I laid awake for a while then curled up with my back to the sunlight coming in the window. I didn't think I had fallen asleep so I must've had a false awakening because I got up and started fiddling with my knitting stuff. I found my crochet hook set but a few of the holes where the hooks should have gone, were filled with pencils, pens and other items, even some small crocheted bits of yarn. I pulled all of these out and started hunting for my loose crochet hooks to put them back. I found a small bunch of them, put a few in, hunted around some more and picked up the set again but it was full of the pencils and pens again. Every time I found a hook, the set was jammed with the other objects again instead. After putting the same hook back 3 times, I thought quietly, "This does not make any sense..." That was when I did a Reality Check. It almost didn't work though! I counted my fingers and I did indeed count 5 fingers... and one thumb, that made six. I tried to stretch out my pointer finger but it wouldn't stretch at first... I counted again, made sure that I was dreaming then I focused and tugged on my finger again. This time it stretched out perfectly. As I sat on my bed in my room I tried to imagine that I had a Snickers candy bar and took a bite but all I chomped on was air. I went back to pulling on my fingers, stretching each one out and letting them slowly morph back to normal. That helped, Then I sat in kind of a half lotus position trying to float upwards off my bed. But I couldn't seem to do that either. I know why I didn't just leave my room, because I could distinctly hear my parents voices talking right outside my door (even though my mom is currently in another state: Tenessee) and I was afraid of sleepwalking or finding out that I was actually awake... I was also not wearing anything which would have been quite embarassing. Plus, in taking the time to get dressed I might have lost the dream. So as I sat there on my bed trying to float, I noticed a golfball sized lamp on my bedroom wall, it looked straight out of a Sims game. It seemed to be getting larger, (from golfball sized to base-ball sized to bowling-ball sized) as I stared at it and it gave off a weirdly bright bluish white light. I was vaguely aware that either the bed was shaking or I was rocking back and forth. The luminescent globe had reached the alarming size of a beach-ball when I finally looked away. I looked down at my hands, counted and tugged my fingers to make sure I was still in a dream and still lucid. When I looked up again, the light was gone. I was glad since the light gave me the willies. I went back to my attempts to float off my bed, but in the process of trying to focus, I accidentally closed my eyes. This I knew was an immediate mistake as it caused me to lose the dream. It was a wacky feeling though, feeling my position shift from sitting upright in a lotus position, to lying down on my side curled up under a blanket.

Tuesday, June 4, 2013
After a loooong time of little to no dream recall, my life got really busy, I finally came back to DreamViews and back to my dreaming. I looked at a WBTB method of going back to sleep after about 4 hours. Here's how that turned out.

I dreamed that I was in an art studio getting some kind of animation lesson from a few people, one of which was Mel Brooks. As I was leaving, I thanked him and called him Mr. Brooks, but then I smiled and asked if I could call him Mel. He grinned at me, he was shorter than I was. I kissed him on the cheek, and he shouted Halleluljah! I kissed his other cheek and he shouted Halleluljah! again. Then I kissed him on the lips and I wasn't sure if he shouted that time or not... I left the area and it was filled with old props from 1920's era of movies. Then I looked around again and it was like I had gone through a time machine. The entire area looked like Hollywood circa 1920. Then the area changed to a mall and an arcade inside the mall, (I wonder if it was Whimsy in the Sherwood Mall?) I past an old coin opperated kiddie ride and I noticed I was walking with my Dad. Then I realized I must have still been back in time because I saw a younger version of my Dad and subsequently a young 6-year-old version of myself, walk past, towards the arcade. I caught up with my older dad and he turned and waved at my younger dad mumbling something about the guy looking familiar to him. The scene changed and I was alone at Delta College before it became a college and was merely a flea market. The sign on what was Danner Hall, read De Wanda. I notice another guy, he points out a young girl saying that it is his daughter, and that she get's married when she turns twenty. The scene changed again and this time I was walking through some kind of hardware store with Dad and Richard. Some weird guy followed me saying strange things and replied, "Oh go ship your... phone. At the checkout counter, I did a Realiy Check and realized I was having a now-lucid dream. Immediately I imagined holding a hot pocket and heating it in my hand. I couldn't really feel it getting hot but it did and in about 20 seconds it was done. I took a single bite and it was some kind of pizza hot pocket, I could taste it. While I was lucid, Richard in the dream, grabbed a rattlesnake and thrust it in my face several times over, he kept shouting at me, "It's only a dream! Only a dream! You can do whatever you want!" Scary flashes of the snake snapping at me and other horrors began to haunt me, turning the dream very nasty indeed. But I was still lucid so even as I was scared, I focused my mind and shouted, "This is going to stop in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1!" I opened my eyes and the nightmarish flashes stopped, although I had a rather creepy visual of Richard holding one of his sockets up to his temple as though it were the barrel of a gun and he said he was proud that I faced my fear. Then I woke up. I had my first Lucid Nightmare but the method worked! The entire dream took about 2 hours.

Since the method adovcated being able to have multiple Lucid's in a single night, I opted to try to get another one in. I tossed and turned until it was 11:00, I kept getting woken up... All worth it though, because I eventually did get to sleep.

The dream was kind of normal, something about cleaning my room, but there was some kind of show going on with an audience watching it. I could not see nor hear any show going on behind me, but the audience complained that I was being too loud for them to enjoy the show. So I opted to leave, taking a CD that I planned to blast at the rude people from the bathroom. A little old guy also wanted to use the bathroom, I let him go into an orange bathroom, while I went into the joined blue bathroom, closing the door between us. This bathroom looked like one from a previous residence I had lived in. I looked at the mirror at my reflection which looked ok except for one major difference. My hair looked ok from about my ears down, but the top looked like it had a bunch of grass in it. Green grass, fresh and lush. I reached up to brush the grass out, but the grass was in fact, growing out of my head! This thought was quite strange to me and rather horrifying. I pulled some of it out, looked down at the grass I had pulled out of my head, looked up, and now there was more than grass, there were weeds in my hair, in fact my head was looking like an unmowed lawn. I start frantically pulling everything green from my head, sickened by the thought of the weeds having roots under my scalp. As I pulled it seemed that I was finding worse things, I began snapping off small branches from my head, my hair had this lovely Gaia Mother Nature look to it but I was too concerned with removing the green from my head. When I was finally finished, my head was almost completely bald, and rough like a shaved dog or cat. I was mortified, but that was when I did my RC and realized I was dreaming. I was sooooo relieved that this was just a dream and I didn't really have things growing out of my head. Recalling that I wanted to make stuff appear in my Lucid Dreams, I looked at my hands and started trying to visualize making an object appear. A small, transparent, reddish, fuzzy ball appeared to float just above my hand, only becoming solid for a bare second. I tried to make it move around but it was choppy and fake like a bad Flash animation. After the ball disappeared, I looked up at my reflection one more time and my hair was completely back and looked beautiful. I smiled and fluffed it a bit. The scene changed to a brilliant night sky full of twinkling stars. I got a running start and flew up into the night. I loved the view of the stars, they looked like little chips of diamond in a sea of indigo, I was loving it. I tried hard not to look down because it felt as though it would pull me down lower. I did try to make that red ball appear again, but I felt that it was splitting my concentration and I was unable to stay aloft. Then the dream became fuzzy again and the scene changed. I think I was doing magic tricks in front of a store window, in fact it may have been the window of the magic shop. I was doing tricks for kids with some small thing, a coin or a mahjong tile or something, I think that the last trick was throwing it against the window, it did not break the window but instead stuck fast on the other side of the window. The kids and other audience members were amazed when they went up to the window and felt the glass over top of the item. I don't think I was lucid for this last part of the dream though I felt more in control than usual. Then I woke up.

So that method seems to work quite well! I had two lucid dreams in one night!

Forgot that I never copied this to my Dream Journal even though I made a post about it. I may as well add another while I'm here.

Co-worker acting Strangely - 12/14/2012

I don't remember how the dream began. Like many of my dreams it took place in one of my childhood homes, except that the wall dividing the two bedrooms at the end of the hall is gone so that it is one big room. A co-worker of mine (I'll call him K) is intentionally scaring people. But not in a leap-around-corners kind of way. More in an extremely-creepy-I'm-intending-to-murder-you way.

I'm watching him from the end of the hall. He's wearing ancient Chinese armor. It's all brown and black, the front and back are dark brown tiles linked together, with black plating underneath. He's wearing kind of a conical helmet with a face on the front, and a face on the back. The armor is designed in such a way that it's very difficult to tell which direction he is actually facing in. K is moving around the two people at the other end of the hall, twisting and sliding and bending like a contortionist.
This is about when I become aware it's a dream. I go to the other end of the hall, though he really scares me. I see that he's pulling a small bronze knife with a triangular blade from inside his armor. I can see another one. I make the choice to steal it as he's twisting around the man at the end of the hall. I believe that this is my only chance to stop the horror of K. So I grab the knife from inside his armor and stab him in the neck. The blade goes in, but he is bloodless. He takes the helmet off and removes the knife from his neck. It slides out like his skin is a sheathe. K slides the knife back into his neck and pulls it out several times, grinning at the three of us. I'm horrified.

The dream skips scenes. I'm standing at the start of the hallway again. I am very tired and I can see my bed. I'm really looking forward to sleeping. It has a tarnished brass frame and stark white sheets. That's when I realize K is laying in the exact middle of the bed, his presence deeply dismays me, though now he's just wearing a white t-shirt. The armor is gone. I assume he's not playing the creepy guy anymore, and see that as a role, a costume. I'm afraid, but I'm tired and I just want to rest. I walk to the bed and pull the sheet back like I'm going to lay down, but then I just stare at him. I can see the bloodless slit in his neck where he was keeping the knife. It really unsettles me. I go into the black doorway across from the bed, knowing it's my parent's bedroom. I realize the couple inside are not my parents, and I don't really know what I expect them to do about my problem. But, like a frightened child (that's even how I identified this action in the dream), I wake the man by lightly touching his foot.
"I don't know where I'm supposed to sleep....K is in my bed."
"It's alright, don't worry about it." The man says.
"But I'm afraid."
The man doesn't respond, I know he's gone back to sleep. I return to my bed. K rolls over and sits up. I just look at him warily.
"It's okay if you lay down." he says.
Reluctantly, I get under the sheets. I'm still afraid. He tries to reassure me that he's not going to kill me, but as he says it he pulls the bronze knife from under one of the pillows and casually slips it into the slit in his neck. He grins. I'm not reassured at all...

I honestly don't understand. As a person, K doesn't scare me. We're even work friends. On top of that I very rarely have nightmares, so I don't know why I had this one. Nothing has happened at work with K to trigger it. ((In hindsight this is hilarious. At the time it was true, I didn't really have nightmares for a long time. I've had many lately =/))

A man in a suit is talking to a young man with a narrow face, black eyes and black hair. He's giving him news of some inevitable event. The guy reacts childishly, beginning to protest in a high, frightened voice. "No, no, no, no, I don't want to. I don't WANT to. No, no, no."
The man in the suit frowns at him, thinking that obviously this person is more child than man. He had expected a more mature reaction. The kid looks dead-eyed, and for a second I wonder if he's pretending to be scared. Then I realize I've misinterpreted his wooden expression, he's terrified.


Saja and Wolf, Shame and Separation 02/05/2013
Part of this is going in a spoiler because it's sexual.
The beginning is much less clear than the end. I'm traveling in proximity with a group of people. It feels like we are on foot, going in the same direction but not actually together.
There's a long lush green field. They sky is gray overhead, but I've always liked how vivid the world looks following a rain spell. There are a couple of people flying kites. From the back, I recognize Walter Bishop. We end up riding bikes down the length of field , careful not to run long black hoses. I had a reason for doing that, but I can't remember it now.
We arrive at the house just before nightfall. The house feels old and rundown. The walls are wood paneled, the carpet dingy white. A few feet from the front door is a large mattress and a chair at the foot of the bed. I stand by the chair. A middle-aged man with curly black hair going gray, decides that the thing to do now is have sex.

Spoiler for grossness. :

Everyone except one woman and a couple of the men object. On the left half of the mattress is the man's brother, laying with a long legged blonde woman. She is only wearing a light blue button-up. He opens the shirt, spooning behind her. I catch the eye of the other man laying on the right half of the bed.
He eyes me lustfully. I just stand there, uncertain, unwilling. All around the house, people are pairing off. I feel like I have to do it too, and at the time, I almost want to.
"Take off your shirt, pants and bra. Leave on the that jacket and your panties."
I do as he says, leaving myself barely clothed now in white panties and a fuchsia duster that hangs to mid-thigh. He holds his hand out to me and I walk across the mattress on my knees to take it. He pulls me down in front of him. I feel a surge a disgust.
"Yes, that's nice." He croons as I lay down on my side. When I move the sweater pulls open. I'm pretty sure I don't want to have sex, especially with all these people around. He tries to convince me otherwise, telling me to watch the others. My eyes skate over the blonde and his brother. He's calling our attention to her arousal.
The man starts to touch me, pressing his lips to my neck and fondling my breasts. He slips a hand down between my legs and whispers to me. This goes on for a long time, but he doesn't take me. The whole thing feels like a mockery of something, and I can't put my finger on what it is. Like there's a deeply buried memory similar to what the man is doing, but this time I'm revolted.

A fierce-looking woman with red-blonde hair stands at the foot of the bed, arms crossed, looking disgusted. She beckons to me. I'm relieved I have a reason to desert the bed, I feel unclean. She goes to the window and peers out through the slats of the blind. It is late and the End is on its way. Unhealthy light flashes through the slats.
"They've started to gather. It's almost time."
"The others are out there?" I ask, intrigued. She glances down at me and I'm acutely aware that I'm mostly naked. I pull the sweater closed and cross my arms to keep it that way. "Is Wolf with them?"
"Who?"
"Our leader." I start to feel stupid. "The one who brought us here." I feel like I've made a mistake and it worries me.
"Oh. Him. I haven't noticed." She pauses. "So...you think that he orchestrated all of this." Her tone makes it sound like he's a low-brow brute and that my suggestion is entirely ridiculous. I'm offended for him, and for myself.
"No, the Spirits told him what to do."
"Oh, of course they did."
I wonder if 'Wolf' means nothing to them but I can't think of another name to call him. I sink into a chair that's angled slightly away from the window. She doesn't realize how deeply her lack of reaction has affected me. I ask about the first person I can think of.

"Is Saja with them?"
She gives me an uncomprehending look. "Could you check? She's..." I briefly describe her, she'd be small with curling black hair to her waist. I'm on the verge of tears now, my voice is thick with emotion.
"No." She responds, looking outside. "Maybe they just haven't arrived yet." She says it like she's just trying to make me feel better.
I completely lose it. My sense of purpose, my hope for all this to be over. The belief that my instincts were right just crumbles to nothing. I feel shame and revulsion for letting a stranger touch me so intimately and in front of others.
"I left for this?"
She doesn't understand what I'm talking about. I realize that she has forgotten all of it. Who we were, what we did, all that we left behind.
"I left Home so that some disgusting perverted stranger could feel me up? I left Liam for this?" I'm crying hysterically now. A different woman tries to comfort me but she has recently left one of the men and I can't stand the thought of her dirty hands on me. I've pulled my knees up to my chest and I'm hugging them as I sob nonsensical questions. The idea that we've come to this has broken me.

02/21/2013 Unsettling, Liam

This dream is unsettling because it was always difficult enough to walk around with this guy at work, because of how much he reminded me Liam. My reasoning mind kept me from thinking about it too much and after repeatedly working with him I had conditioned myself to ignore it. I had never dreamt anything like this with him as the focus and it made me very uncomfortable. For anyone who is hasn't been following along, Liam is a vivid DC who often appears in my dreams. He's tall, with copper or auburn hair and blue eyes. I'll leave the description at that.
I'm sitting on a dark blue couch pressed against a wall of dark tinted windows. It is night outside, it has a very...after-hours feel. Beside me is someone I used to work with who reminds me of Liam.
A pretty young woman sweeps out of the place, calling over her shoulder about meeting him later for coffee. He looks troubled, tense, unhappy. As I am about to ask him what's wrong, he speaks into the stillness.
"I don't know what I'm supposed to tell my wife." He says.
I smile sympathetically and pull my knees up onto the couch.
"I guess that depends on your intent. If you're going to coffee because you have feelings for her..."
He cuts me off with a humorless laugh. "You think this is about her?"
I freeze, unsure what I should do or say. Does that mean I'm the problem? Even in the dark I can tell he keeps glancing at me, deeply troubled. He averts his eyes, bowing his head, thinking how difficult this has become. He's trembling with the effort to...stay contained. To not cross a line. After a long moment, he reluctantly reaches over and touches my knee. This forcefully reminds me of Liam. I blush furiously, trying to stifle the rush of emotions that beset me. I sit very still. He starts to withdraw his hand when I pull it back by linking my pinky and ring finger with his, very aware of the weight of his hand and the pounding of my heart. He desperately wants this and doesn't at the same time.
I release his hand and rise to my knees beside him. I'm wearing a faded green tank top that I haven't seen since I was in high school. He presses his hand flat against my abdomen. I realize that this is the closest I will ever come to being intimate with Liam and decide to revel in the moment. He looks up at me. Faint light from outside illuminates the left side of his face and turns one eye into a shining pool. He looks so much like Liam that it hurts. He reaches up with his free hand and presses his palm to the left side of my neck. Again, I think of Liam. He draws me down and brushes his lips below my right ear. I lose track of everything.
Something forces me awake.

This dream was from a while back. I was hanging out with freinds of mine. They ended up ditching me and i ended up getting lost in the middle of the woods and these vampires started chasing me. I remember i ended up in a mansion in the middle of the woods when being chased and then found my way out. I don't remember if i escaped from the vampires or not anymore. It was from a while back.

Begin dream fragment:

My friend Kevin who trains a lot in the gym like I do, told me he was going to stop going to the gym because he "didn't have time". I was really surprised and a bit pissed off initially because I was going to sign up to the gym instead of just training at home.

End of non-lucid fragment.

Sleep at 15:00 wake-up 18:30 Lucidology timer, first interval after 70 minues, but I am not sure if it rangs. No MILD technique. The day before l read Lucidology 101 i 103 "pry eye lids" and talked with LD expert about it.

I woke up and then felt asleep a couple of times. At last I am laying on my bed awaken. I got a desire to have an OBE. I am concentrating myself to the other body which is in the opposite side of my room.I am feeling vibrations and sense of spiral movement down and down. I stand up and try RC. Point finger goes through my palm. I see it with a littly hazy sight, but afterwards I dont see anything. Despite that fact I want to fly up. I am feeling the sensetion of flying and clearly the feel of the material of our roof that I must being flying throughout. But I am still blind. I am angry and screaming "CLARITY NOW". But nothing happens. I remember at Lucidology 103 that I can open my nonphysical eye lids with nonphysical hands. I do it and it works! All I see is the edge of my bed and wall as being seen from the sleeping position. It looks the same as in reality. Strange. After I drop my eyelids again I dont see anything. i wake up. In that moment it was very vivid, but not after the final awakening I remember it with some obstacles. I still dont know if it was a false awakening LD or OBE.

Date: 08 June

Total sleep time: 6 1/2 hrs

Pre bed: 200mg valerian

WBTB: cold latte (103.4 mg caffeine), did not feel very strong despite the warnings on the label

Dream quality and recall: Hmm, recall was quite difficult today, I was extremely sleepy pre WBTB and after falling asleep post WBTB. Vividness was as far as I can remember normal. Not totally sure about the sequence of the dreams. I did wake up naturally after WBTB and tried to commit the dreams to memory without taking any notes, but then quickly fell asleep. After final wake I was like " What, I don't remember anything at all?" Then some fragments emerged.

Dream1: I am in my grandma's place and there is a hungry lion in there too. I barely notice it , just know that it is there. (It seems I wasn't looking forward to giving it a hug today!) So, I get a large bone to lure it, it looks like some big KFC leftover and I throw it in the corridor, while trying to sneak out. I am not very sure where this lion is, but I am contemplating on an escape plan...

Fragment2: In some place, which reminds me of a block that I only dream about. The place is a bit different, and the floor is made of Chinese tiles. I am crossing it, and in the meantime lots of Asians appear there. They have to be careful because there are fragile blue/white Chinese dishes on the floor. I go with a touch of irritation, pick some guy and tell him he should not do what he is doing. I get the feeling of another dream with some Japanese girls I had a long time ago.

Fragment3 DILD: No idea how this dream started, when I got lucid and what I else I did while lucid. It is quite dark, and it seems I ran into a DC that I assume is Xanous. I address him and start talking to him. I remember he may not be lucid, so I grab him by the shoulders, shake him a bit and repeat several times that this is a dream. Then I remember to do the gesture, and finally repeat the passcode a few times. It looks like he is trying to memorize it, I repeat it a few more times, hopefully he will remember. I hold his head with my hands, while the dream slowly fades away.

Comments: Well a bit unlikely that this was Xanous, did he say anything back? I am so good at terrorizing innocent DCs. Sorry guys!

Long dreams, but not much recall.

Dream 1(fragment):

I was playing some video game.

Dream 2(fragment):

I was searching something in some weird city.

Dream 3(fragments):

There was some story about some anime character that could time travel, i was going with him and we were trying to save something, then when we got back someone noticed that that character got older while only the day passed.

Dream 4(fragments):

I was at home and there was some discussion about UFOs, i started noticing few weird mini square fragments in everything that looked like Alien Alloys from XCOM game, i touched one of them and it felt weird.

My dreams have been dry for the past few weeks and I was not expecting a WILD this morning. Last night I went to a reggae concert and came home around 3am, pretty drunk and high. I went to bed and woke up around 9 am. I was still really tired so after being up for about an hour I decided to go back to sleep and was surprised by a WILD.

I was falling asleep on my stomach but I usually try to WILD while lying on my back. First I become aware of some really good rock music Ive never heard playing somewhere to my left. Then I begin to hear a television playing in the back of the room and I hear people talking and walking in the hallways of my house. I focused on the rock music, it sounded like a mix of motley crue and poison, and my started to feel very tingly and I knew I was falling asleep. Now I didnt feel like i was in my bed anymore, I was in my girlfriend's room. My body begins to slide forward out of the bed and I'm lying half in the bed and half on the floor. The floor was hardwood and my girlfriend had carpet floor so now I'm absolutely sure that I'm dreaming. I check my hands and sure enough, their all blurry and swollen looking. This was very vivid and I became very excited.
But before I have time to do anything, I become aware that my mom has walked into my real-life bedroom looking for somehting and she's talking on the phone. I'm wondering "why the heck would my mom be in my room especially while im sleeping?" but I try to ignore her so I can resume my dream when she walks out. She stands near my bed and I'm aware that she's hovering over me while talking on the phone. When she finally does walk out, I can't fall asleep anymore and I realize my mom never even walked into my room and that I was still dreaming.
I feel like I learned alot about LDing here but next time I hope to accomplish more with a WILD and to remain asleep longer.