non-lucid

Is this website dying? seems no one DJ's here after the spring competition...

On the last entry: The "drive by". I heard the Jamie voice in my head apologize for that or something. No! It's okay. I go stir crazy sometimes trying to figure how "real," what I am experiencing is. To show up on the day I post about something distressing... Nah, you threw me a line girl! Thanks.

BTW if Jamie reads these. Because of my situation at home, my cousin just offered me a room in Lethbridge, I can get my old job back, I'm on 3 delivery apps, and i have the basic skills to start a side business. You KNOW how mentally unhealthy my family is. It's triggering for me here. I understand I was put here for now, to be closer to your area, for a reason. I'll hold out for as long as I can. But, if it gets really bad here. I gotta run. I'll let ya know. I'd hate to because it seems like a phenomenal amount of progress has been made between us.

Anyway dreams:

Jamie is crazy

FA, get out of bed and I see it's hailing out and there's a big storm (It's also night time.) I don't think to RC. I hear my brother say he hopes Jen makes it home okay. I hear a crash and I hear Jamie's voice from the kitchen say, "Rob, come look!" I run into the kitchen and see Jamie (As Jen) standing behind my dad. There's an acoustic guitar smashes over him. Parts of the wood are stabbed inside his body and the strings are cutting him. He's awake but makes no sound. I keep asking, "Um Should I call an ambulance?" Jamie keeps saying while grinning, "No, I think he'll make it."

Remind me to NEVER really piss Jamie off... my god.

Work

I'm working in some large building with storeys. I'm new, but everyone is wearing Wal-Mart vests. I see Jamie as a different girl. and the nametag says, "Julie," I have false memories, of working in another town with a girl that looked like her name ,"Julia.". Jamie's eyes widen in fear and she runs past me. Her friend (The one I met at the metal party at the airstrip in didsbury.) says something like, "Oh I think she likes you. Just let her make all the moves on you, she will." and I'm like, "Okay, i'm pretty shy with that stuff anyway so it's nice when someone else takes initiative." But in the middle of the sentence the girl I'm taking to is replaced by a chubby woman with grey hair. She yells at me, "Stop talking and get to work."

bed

FA, Jamie and her friend walk into my bedroom. I see Jamie as Katelynn now (Great now my perception of her is off again). I'm like, "I haven't seen you in so long we should have a hug." (knowing it's really Jamie.) Jamie goes to hug me in bed but turns around and I hug her from behind. Her behind is literally on my you know what again. But her friend drags her off the bed an out of the room. (note: In addition to the voice, While going to sleep or waking up in the middle of the night or early morning. There is a phantom sense of Jamie with me. I experience hugs, and other things. And I have read other "Twin Flames" have gone through this as well. While I think I'm going crazy, I do find it comforting.)

Last night.

Two brief flashes


In one Jamie is prancing some other guy around in front of me. I start getting mad and Raven says something like, "She just needs healing"

in the second Flash. I'm watching peaceful energy go over Jamie. Her vacant, glassy eyes become whole again. She looks at me and smiles. and we grab our hands together.

Well, we got attacked again. I tried to get Raven to help but of course, her dream friends also got attacked, so she spent some nights trying to resolve that.

Suspected Jamie drive by again. This time outside my place as it was getting dark. The car turned down the alley where my backyard is facing. Although it was hard to see due to some branches, it was the quick head turn that was the give away, and the hair. This on the same day of my distressing post. Maybe she was checking on me? Different vehicle again... Maybe I'm just paranoid and seeing what I wanna see. Maybe she borrows a family or friends vehicle. This reminds me of a Tik Tok post Emily King made a while ago on this sort of thing: https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMMqVB6sw/

[COLOR="#800080"]Warehouse[COLOR]

I was forced to work in a strange warehouse. There were these tiny rooms against a large wall but they were all connected. Everyone was supposed to go into the tiny rooms and do something I forget. I was put into a room and there was a tiny window next to me. I looked inside and saw two men being gay. Won't go into detail.

Then I had false memories of Jamie being with me earlier, but people had separated us.

This made me angry so I smashed through all the walls and knocked some people over. Some short black guy teleported to me trying to fight. He was jumping up and down really fast trying to be hard to hit. I put my hand on the top of his head to keep him there. He couldn't escape but then my memory fades.

The rest of the night I had 2 short dreams. I was trying to find Jamie but kept running into two women with cloth gags in their mouths. They kept saying Jamie was busy but to play with them. I wasn't having it

Next night.

Left on read

I was in a construction place with my dad and brother. I kept pulling out my phone and looking for messages from Jamie. There was an old message saying she needed space or something. Work was boring but when we had to leave, my dad was in a wheelchair and had an oddly shaped head.

Last night:

Maybe a dream about my Dog and some dogs.

Strange

Dreamed I was leaving work with some people. We all had separate vehicles. I followed them to some cul de sac area. We waited and chatted. Can't remember about what. I drove off but there was some confusion about who should leave first.

Drove into a downtown street like a cross between the two downtown's of Didsbury and Carstairs. There was all these people on the street blocking the way. Suddenly instead of driving, I was walking. It was night. I ran into my cousin, and said the one restaurant that I use for pickup was closed for the holiday. He mentioned a couple that were open. I asked about the one where Jamie worked (apparently she works at a bar in the dream). He said that I'm still not allowed in there, or something because of Her. Then he said it was BS because he heard Jamie say that she was okay with me, but the owner still wouldn't allow me in. Then my memory fades.

The first thing I remembered was my mom offering me a vegan beef jerky stick. I accepted her offer and took a bite. It was very tasty and juicy. After taking a few more bites, I noticed that there was a green slime all over it. I began scratching it off and thought to look where she grabbed it from. It was next to a window AC unit and there was slime and mold all over the other jerky sticks.



Starting to get nervous, I searched google on my phone what would happen if you ate slime mold.

• You will experience extremely vivid lucid dreams.
• If more than a drop is ingested, you will die."

"Oh no" I thought as I start pacing around and as my vision begins to fade, I feel extremely tired and find a place to fall over. I hear my mom say something about needing to keep me awake so I don't die.
Everything is black and I can sense my body free floating in the void. "I ate a lot more than one drop, I guess this is the end of me." I accepted my fate.

"Wait, that was a dream, I didn't eat any mold." glad to be alive I began flying upward into the void, seeing different images of worlds and places as I flew. What solidified was a world where the ground, walls, and sky were made up of an enormous blanket.



"Time to skydive teleport"
*This is a task I made up where I look at an object on the ground that has similar color to a place I want to teleport to. I dive into it and imagine that I'm actually skydiving into the place I want to go to.*

I see a tan rectangle in the blanket and attempt to visit a desert, instead of shrinking down and skydiving like I wanted, I'm just moving downward, and the blanket is being pushed down with me. I start swinging my arms around feeling the blanket as I look up and attempt to speak to my subconscious mind. "You and me are going to have a lot of fun together!" I began flying back up. "Could you create a dream character that represents you?" I plead. "Okay." A very quiet and meek sounding voice responded. "Did you agree to do it?" Not sure if I actually heard anything or not. "Yes!" it responded a bit louder but just as meek. I look around and see a huge muscular black guy. He starts rapping.
"Some people think they're all that, but they only good in the hood."

I lose lucidity at some point listening to him. I can't remember the rest of the rap, it was very good though. It had to do with people who think they're really good because the people around them are bad.
I wake up.

Note: first long DILD

Jamie and me are getting attacked in dreams again. Can't we just catch a break?

What?

I walk into a large basement room. Jamie is there but looks like an older woman I've seen from Tik Tok with a big fat guy. He looks like the guy who was the husband of the Jamie look alike I saw in wal mart a while ago. Jamie teleports him away. I go to the bed, but it's not a couch, I sit beside her and say, "Hello." Jamie just ignores me. The dream ends.

Jamie's double

I'm in a basement but it looks different from the last one. I'm exploring different rooms but I come to a big living room. I see two Katelynn's sleeping next to each other on a mat. I instinctively feel one Is Jamie however. I pick one up and begin going to another room. I decide against it for some reason and put her back. I notice one of them seems to be a darker shade.

School

All I remember is being in a classroom with children. The teacher starts complaining to me that I keep falling asleep and snoring. I decide I'm dropping out. I go by the door to collect my shoes. One of my shoes is really worn and is torn in half. I begin walking across the field to leave and I forget the rest.

I wake up and ask the Jamie voice if she had any dreams about me? She said something like she saw two of herself. I drifted off then.

Jamie's Double 2

I am briefly dreaming from Jamie's perspective. I'm in a dark room like the one with the two Katelynns I look down on a sleeping mat and I see myself, and also myself (Me, Robert the author.) I see them both between long strands of brown hair that are dangling down.

I consult Raven the next day that I am having two problems: 1. There's a Fake Jamie in my dreams. 2. I'm not seeing Jamie as herself, but other people (Jen, Katelynn, older lady) Raven agrees to help.

Last night:

again?

Brief dream where Jamie is next to another woman and being a little too friendly with her, and I'm jealous and angry.

Other dreams were random non lucids. They seemed really long but I can't remember much. none of them had Jamie in them.

Hotel

I'm in the hotel again but I can't remember what happened. Just lots of rooms with lots of people.

Busy

I'm with lots of people but we are going around town and doing things, can't remember what.

Recycling

I'm with my brother but he has a truck. We are by a beach, kind of like Sylvan lake. I take these bags of bottles and load them into the truck. some guy comes up to me and says he wants to buy the truck. Then I notice the bags are gone. I accuse him of stealing the bags. He says he just wants to buy the truck. I just get mad or something and talk to other people about him and eventually he leaves. I then talk to my brother about the guy.

I recently found an older SSILD tutorial on reddit that answered some questions I had about some aspects of it, so I’ve been trying it out the past few nights and felt like I was getting somewhere with it.

Around 6 or 7am a plant light turned on in another room too early, so I got up and turned it off. When I went back to sleep I went through 5 or 6 quick SSILD cycles, then began the slow ones. I feel like when I’m focusing on my tactile sensations I’m making progress, I think I fell asleep during one of those cycles.

One thing to note is that I had a benadryl around 6PM or so, my seasonal allergies were going crazy yesterday for some reason.

Awoken from dream sleep

On the side of a large smooth sloping hill/mountain there are many large nests attached to it with human sized eggs in them. I'm sleeping in one with two eggs around me. Something strikes the nest and I hear voices calling to me. I'm very tired and I look over the edge of the nest down the hill, there's a walking path down there that hugs the side of the mountain. P and a man are there looking up at me waving.

P looks very excited and shouts up to me that I should wake up and join them. I go back into the fetal position and shut my eyes, I just want to sleep. They continue calling for me so I get up and find myself walking with them on the path.

The situation is that P is looking for a new boyfriend and she had spent her time with this guy and now she wants to spend some time with me.

P is now showing me a motherboard that she's building. She's talking about how she plans to put a chip in a specific spot that will translate the audio of a game she's playing into German. I feel like she's just saying that because I'm learning German and she's probably not actually interested in learning it.

As she's talking I look at her, she's still looking at the circuitry talking away, the thoughts in my head drown out her words. I think to myself how beautiful she looks but also that I need to be with someone that I truly resonate with, I remind myself that I don't think that she and I would ever work out together.

Suddenly we're in my kitchen and I'm completely lucid. I turn to her and say "... I'm lucid?" She's holding a bag of popcorn, she puts a piece in her mouth nodding and says "Yup!". I walk over to her and ask her if I can borrow the bag of popcorn, she hands it to me and I take it.

I put the bag up to my nose and smell the hot air coming out, which of course smells like popcorn. I walk around my kitchen while smelling the popcorn, I'm very aware of the tactile senses of my body.

I turn to P and say "It's so stable, like, it's SO stable!" She just smiles and says "Yeah I know!" She adds "Can I have the popcorn back?” I say sure and hand it off to her. I go over to various counters and look at labels on different packaging that I find. I find myself slightly less grounded since I don't have the hot popcorn wafting into my face anymore so I shift my attention back to the sensations of my body. I'm so caught off guard that I'm lucid, I just take in what's around me.

As I turn around I find myself in a dark place that feels like an underground parking lot with hardly any lights on. There's a group of maybe 8 or so people huddled very closely together faced inward. It reminds me of that scene in 'I am Legend' when he finds those zombie like people in a dark building huddled together.

I imagine a spotlight is shining down on them and it happens. The people are looking at me squinting, shielding their eyes with their hands. One guy says "Could you not?" My recall ends around here.

Cyborg Hunt

A couple of scientists were really sad when they found their cyborg was dead. After scanning it they, thought the "living" parts were counterfeit. Meaning that the alive half of the cyborg escaped. The DNA was very important to them. Eventually they found the living part and shrunk down to the size of cells. They were surfing on a glowing blue metal thing hitting corrupt parts of the flesh with a rod. The rod triggered an immune response and the surrounding tissue stretched out, forming tendrils that attacked the spots.

Limb Manipulation

I hear my brother call for my sister "J, come!" I'm facing a wall I know I didn't fall asleep looking at. "Ah I'm dreaming." I begin closing my eyes and twitching my fingers for a reality check, as I open my eyes, I'm floating in-between many false awakenings. I begin rubbing my hands together until eventually I stabilize in a void. It's different than normal though, it's hard to explain but it had depth to it. When I started flying up, I could sense that I was traveling through a three-dimensional area if that makes sense. "Minecraft, I want to visit Minecraft. What does Minecraft look like?" I began thinking to myself.

Then all around me I began to see the World forming, bright, vibrant and blocky. "Time to experiment" I thought while bringing my hand up to block my left eye. Just like IWL I saw double, there was a transparent section followed by a solid more defined section of my hand. Satisfied by the results I brought my hand back down. The only thing was that only the solid portion of my hand was in my control. The translucent portion stayed behind and solidified as a large object next to the tree's that were in the background. "Maybe I can use this."



I start heading in a random direction. "Cursed arm summoning." I imagine my arm reaching through the ground in front of me. I see it reach out and I can control it like my normal arm.



I continue walking summoning more arms under my control. Spontaneously, I decide to try grabbing things with the arms and pulling as a way to boost me forward faster, it fails.

"I can try to summon a husk for possession at this rate" I look at a distant mountain for the husk and find it. The arms are reaching out of the ground and it's pulling itself upward. It's now just standing still, it resembles an armor stand with missing textures. "A perfect blank canvas."



I think about possessing it, then my body begins moving in 4 quick forward zooms, as soon as I'm about 20 feet away I finally fully possess it. I turn around to see the husk I left behind, it's now running straight at me. I hold my hand Infront of me and dismiss it into the abyss below, it falls.

I start looking around the top of the mountain and hear a Girl talking.

"You wouldn't believe how much a chunk with a Lemon and Apple tree cost me, zero!"

"This is my chance to talk to a DC," I started thinking to myself about what I should say or even how I should talk. "Just say something, idiot." I focused.

"Oh my dear, that must have been expensive!" My words came out delayed, and I noticed I sounded extremely posh and had a British accent.

"Didn't you hear me?" she questioned. "It cost zero!"

"Oh well, I seem to have misheard what you said. That's fantastic!"

"It's simply horrible! On top of that, I have to live next to the river where I can go boating anytime as well!"

"Now, now, don't want to get too exuberant about the river now, shall we?" I quipped, breaking a few blocks in the chunk as we spoke. The sarcasm was nice, and she seemed to be happy.
I saw some artwork hidden in the blocks I was breaking.
I wake up.

The day before this dream I was car-pooling with my family to my sister's 40th birthday in Dallas, it was a 4 hour drive and I was using active imagination for some spells I could cast in a dream.
I thought my spells could link to something I already know how to control, like my arm moving I thought. So I came up with a few spells. Here are two.

Cursed Arm Summon: Summons an arm out of the ground that I can control. The arm can be grabbing an object as it comes out, such as a sign or tree and use it to swing around.

Cursed Husk Summon: First summon the arm, then imagine it's pulling it's self out of the ground fully. The idea is have it do something that you want, or possess it for short range teleportation. It's important that the summoned arm is under your control. *My brother suggested that possessing a husk should leave a body behind, and it would attack me.*

I basically had around 8 hours of active visualization imagining what it would look like.

Besides that I wanted to try and put my hand in front of my left eye to see what would happen in a dream.

This is Day 42 because I noted some fragments during the competition, and forgot to send them in...

Two dreams tonight!

I'm inside a house, in a white dress, holding a baby. The front door opens and a man enters, he's wearing a hat and sunglasses and his expressionless, confident manner creeps me out. It seems I'm used to his entry, and I keep my head down and stand still while he walks up and down the living room before leaving. I don't remember arriving - I get the feeling I've been here for a long, long time.

Sometime later, my parents have come to visit, and I break down. "I don't want to live here," I sob. My dad pats me on the back but they both have expressions of not knowing what to say. This house looks a lot like my own house.

I'm outside, standing near the bottom level of a sort of Roman amphitheatre, a hand resting on the iron fence surrounding the arena. A soft shawl wraps around my shoulders. The theatre is sandstone-coloured and completely empty, weeds springing up through cracks in the stone. A man approaches from the arena and we talk for a while. I feel relaxed and peaceful, breezes are blowing.

Then I am in the house once more. I go to open the front door and let my mother in. She is outside and a little way back, waiting, is the creepy man. I hurriedly usher her in and shut the door in his face - I don't want him here today. Through the peephole I can see his face peering boredly in.

I show her into the lounge, and wanting to be far away from the man at the front door, suggest we go and stand by the far window. She agrees and we walk to the back of the room, gazing out. And then, the creepy man steps into view. He's come around the back of the house to the very edge of the window. I stand frozen in apprehension and he, too, is still - until he winds up his arm and smashes a wooden chair through the glass. Still expressionless, he moves to climb through the window. My mother and I seize another chair and use it to hit him and push him back. He doesn't yield.

Suddenly my dad is here, and so are the police. They have a 'stun gun' - not a taser but actually a tranquilliser gun with very short darts - and start shooting rapidly towards the man, and us behind him.

He's knocked out, but I feel and see a dart pierce my skin. I try to tell my dad that I've been hit, but no-one is listening and I feel my eyelids growing heavy. My eyes close as I'm babbling, grabbing at his arm.


2

I'm on a 'snowmobile'. No idea how those are actually supposed to look or what they do, but mine has a wide driver's seat and wheel, two seats behind and one on the back facing backwards. I drive it through the market street in the evening when who should I run into but a boy from my primary school (who I actually just met yesterday for the first time in ages) and his friends. We both exclaim at the coincidence and they ride on my snowmobile for a short distance. They drop off as I turn out of a narrow street onto the main road.


Regarding the first dream, the setting was a sort of dystopian society under heavy surveillance. I don't know how to fit it into the journal, it was just a feeling I had; the creepy man was there to watch me and how I lived. The baby might not have been mine, either.

Hazy Maze Cave:
I'm in a large space reminiscent of hazy maze cave from Super Mario 64.
I'm with Azula, Mai and Ty Lee from Avatar the Last Airbender.
I've won a battle and hooking up with Azula is the prize. Fairly vivid.
…
Elsewhere in the cave there is another large open section with more openings on the left and the right. The further one has a portal or time-related effect. Stuck in time.
I find some old stuff of mine there.
…
I’m leaving my car and walking through the parking lot to get to work. There is an escort standing by the turnstile with some pen and paper. She wants to give me her name and number.
I already have a sheet of paper and make a weak excuse. She fills her's out instead.
My hands are full with stuff and I finally struggle through the turnstile. My coworker B’s wife, J, asks me if I have my ant colony and my ant friend with me.
I quickly say yes, but then realize I don’t. Annoyed, I make my way back through the turnstile and head to my car.

Some really good dreams this past couple of days. Someone must have really liked my last entry!

Jamie 1

I'm outside a bar with Jamie. The same one from a while ago. It's a real place in Didsbury, the two bars facing one another practically across the street. Jamie is just being goofy. She has these napkins and keeps putting chipotle sauce on napkins and trying to make me eat it. WTF. No Chick-Fil-A sauce?

Jamie 2

Same place again. It's night time. We are alone and it's really late. Jamie goes up to an old grey car and starts trying to remove the headlight.

A bunch of other jamie flashes but they are too short to comprehend.

Next night:

Family outing

I'm with family in calgary, apparently visiting my Mom. We are in a park near the bow river but everything looks different than normal. I'm up on a hill and below is a grizzly bear, but it seems friendly. I find a bounce thing that propels you in the air. I jump on it and fly high over bridges. When I land I'm in a truck with my dad. We are in an uncomfortable silence. Suddenly I'm in a mall and Jamie is on my right and my dad is on my left. He make a really rude comment when we pass by some ice cream and smoothie stand. There's two small vats with flavored milk with a beater in each. He says since me and Jamie are lovers we should get an idea from those mixers... It makes no sense but it sounds sexual and rude. I just ignore it. I try to lean against Jamie while I walk and she almost stumbles or trips. I apologize and she puts her arm around me. I notice I'm eating a bunch of mini plain doughnuts from a small paper bag. I go to eat one and Jamie tries to grab it out of my hand. I give it to her. I say, "I don't like the taste of these anyway." As they are pretty bland. That's all I remember.

Audio only dream

I hear both me and Jamie reciting The Lord's Prayer together.

The real Jesus.

In my vision I see something like a nice painting. It resembles Jesus Baptizing Jamie in a stream.

I really hope it's true.

Day 4

Fragments as dictated to voice recorder

…/The closed door and I cannot get back into my place/…

…/The theme about <incomprehensible> from day before got into the dream/…

…/I see guys are wearing suits from 60’s~70’s/…

While WBTB I’m able to remember more details about the dreams while drifting back into dreamland. In that moment I think to myself that I will remember about those details. Then I get lost back into some other dream and forget them all

Day 5

Fragments

…/I’m collecting flags or something similar and putting them on sort of wooden towers. It’s a very Assassins Creed like sequence. It’s day. I’m in a big country house. There’s a lot of people around. There’s a wooden structure in the middle of a yard. I climb to put the flag on the top. I’m wandering around. There’s an Asian fat guy wearing only white trousers. He’s about to take a shower. I wonder how is he doing to get hot water if his heating system is off. I want to take a shower too, I think I might use his shower and let people blame him for using the heater because of it should be off/…

…/I’m getting to the side of U’s house in the middle of a field. It’s all covered under snow, it gets to my knees [competition theme related]I have to pick a bike that lays to the side of the road next to the house. S and N are already on their way. I have to hurry to get where they are. I’m in a hurry and distracted playing with a small purple/pink doll of gum. It’s like a key hanger. I have to be careful not to let some of its small parts fall on the snow, they might get lost there, it’s very deep/…

…/Sh brought some started joints and puts them on the table. He gives me one as I ask for a present. His girlfriend gets into the room. I cover the stuff with a shirt and pretend I’m folding clothing. She asks for a jacket that I see close to my right. I say I have no idea where is it and choose to ignore her/…

…/I get out of one of my recurrent graveyards and turn to the left heading back to my grand parents house. I see two guys talking. I wear my headphones and try to play some music with my mp3 player. It’s not working and it starts getting more and more complicated as I try to connect the headphones with the player, I stop paying attention to the place/…

It’s a recurrent dreamscape

Day 6

…/I’m taking part of some kind of Muppet Show sequence. I see Animal with a big monster bird standing on his arm in front of me. He gets scared the hell out of a dove that is standing on my back/…

Days 7 - 8

*Black Out*

Day 9

Fragments

…/I’m in the first place I rented. I see ER and we have a nice talk on the bed, I’m glad to meet her again. She lays first then I lay too close that she starts feeling uncomfortable. I try to explain her about somebody I know who reminds me to her. I pay too much attention on her body. I’m visiting for short. I didn’t set all of the stuff for the transport. There are two beds and one of my closets. There’re other friends from school CaMa is there and we let some Legos on the bed. RU comes around with somebody else, it has something to deal with black metal or music.
While I’m going downstairs to do something I meet the old woman who leases the house. She’s angry because of some plants where hidden under the stairs. She’s complaining about it because of the plants will rot and stink the whole place. I try to explain I wasn’t that person. She goes on arguing telling if it’s like that then she will have to get a new tenant. I don’t care/…

…/Some other people is waiting outside of the room on the roof. They want to get in to make some reparations on the water pipes/…

…/There’s some celebration day around. I see there are new stores on the street. A lot of things have changed. I try to find which was the small store I knew. It’s confusing, I want to buy something, may be a Coca-Cola. Somebody says that the people from this house buy their Cokes in a small store and points somewhere between two big business. I’m bit nervous about talking with new people. There’s some integration with the sellers/…

…/The doors of the house that lead to the garage are partially opened to let light come in, otherwise it’s impossible to see something. The lady had covered all of the open spots, I don’t find something I put on an empty oil barrel/…

At this moment other dreams get mixed while recalling, it’s another recurrent dreamscape. I tend to dream on the times before the last move so far. Sometimes I’m in a hurry or about to miss the flight

Day 10

I was playing Assassins Creed with one of my daughters the whole night just dreamed more smashed sequences of the game

Day 11

*Black Out*

Day 12

Fragment

…/I’m near a Main Street I used to walk very often during my school days. I see big trucks [competition theme related] crashing with each other. A white one loses control and crashes straight against the wall of a house that cuts the street. I’m arranging sort of cassettes close to the street, near a park of my childhood. Somebody comes and asks for help, The driver got hurt we must help! He says, I have to stop what I’m doing/…

Day 13 - 14

*Black Out*

non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid FA / AP

I awake in my bed in my teenage room, with something latching onto my left butt cheek. It's like a leech but square, roughly 2 cm each side. I drop it in the bed in horror and it magically goes through the bed sheet. I capture it and put it in a Tupperware type container I have at my bedside table with a bit of flat bread inside, as I go grab my phone to film it. When I come back the flat bread is alive and moving and when I try to grab it, it tries to bite me, as if the creature merged with it.
My mom is asleep but I want her to see it so I go get her and on return, it grew in size to look like a loaf of bread that is now moving on the floor. Then it takes over a duvet by shooting inside it what seem like very thin snakes. Then red insects come out of it and they all make it move as if the duvet is alive. I am now concerned with the spread of this "creature" and want to burn the whole thing down. But my cats just enter the room, see all that movement in the duvet and they wanna play and jump to it. I am horrified they might also get contaminated and shoo them out of the room. But certain that they were already infected or possessed buy that thing. I close the door to my bedroom and come outside with my mom to think of what to do.
I review the videos and think about showing them to some authority, but when I do, no one even looks at them when I tell the story, they just mock me.
Somehow I end up in a military base in Israel though and asked to wait for some ceremony to end, in the back of the room, supposedly to talk to someone. Although I am not a supporter of the Israel military and their whole colonizing history, I sympathize with the people here and I feel their fear.
There is word of an imminent attack at any moment. There are some fireworks in the distance which send everyone into panic mode, but through the window on the back of the room, where I'm seated, I can see the fireworks and I tell everyone to relax. But there are some sounds of unrest coming from the hallway outside, which puts the guards on alert and they form a barrier by the door with guns pointed and ready to shoot. Then it's just someone who's late for the event and they stand down. But the fear in everyone's mind is real and I feel it to. It's not a matter of if, but a matter of when.
Meanwhile I am trying to show my videos to someone who asked me about it, but the phone isn't cooperating and I can only find videos of my cats playing.

First off. I wanna backtrack on what I said about soul ties. I did some research and the term is not biblical. That crazy stuff about sex may not be true.

second: I was doing my prayers yesterday. Jesus kept pressing on me to give Jamie things to pray about... and I'm like: I get that, but could you be more specific? I was not expecting an answer but Galatians 4:3 screamed into my head. I actually never read all of the bible yet... So I wasn't particularly familiar with that book. I was skeptical but looked it up on bible gateway website. and the NIV translation really shocked me: So also, when we were underage, we were in slavery under the elemental spiritual forces of the world of course you always have to go with context. the next verses describe going into Jesus as a son or daughter, and onward it says 9 But now that you know God—or rather are known by God—how is it that you are turning back to those weak and miserable forces ? Do you wish to be enslaved by them all over again? So what I gather is: pray against your vices and keep them in check. And spiritual forces. I pray all that over her.

third: To Jamie, try not to feel worried or pressured that you must do anything towards me soon or right away. Take your time. If you know Jesus now, get to know him and rest in him - Lay your worries at his feet. I was on tikTok yesterday and occasionally i get BPD related videos and one said something that seemed to reflect what she said in a dream, when she said, "Please be very patient with me." It said: be patient and let them open up to you. I know it can be dangerous to you to jump into something if you're not ready or careful. I still have some issues to work on myself - Trauma over memories and stuff, which the head voice helps with (I ask: what did it mean when you did/said this or that sort of thing. Her voice does answer even sometimes reluctantly. I get answers that seem to make sense - not going to rely on this completely, the only answers i can really trust is yours.) I wanna work on making myself a safe place for you.

Dreams: only 2 from last night.

Fight

I was in a grassy hill area. I was flying around in the air or something. Jamie was walking on a hill all zoned out doing her glass eye thing. A bunch of people were fighting on another hill. A big witch was wielding a sceptor shooting electricity. Raven was there. I can't remember much.

ok

Another sex dream.. This time in a bunch of sheets.

honestly I kind of miss the dreams where we seem to be talking - negotiating, asking questions.

The Body Snatcher:
I’m at work and there is a horror movie scenario going in.
There is a body snatcher or imitator alien infecting my coworkers. Similar to gameplay I’ve been watching recently.
J from my old work group is upstairs in my current building.
He is acting off. I suspect him of being the body snatcher or affected by it.

Fragment:
I'm outside and there is an army invasion.
I have a vague understanding that the attackers are from the government, in other words, betraying the people.
It’s dark and scary. The army men look fit and uniformed in dark. Helmets cover their faces.

Fragment:
My dad is being investigated by a stereotypical gumshoes style detective.

Champion of Farore:
I’m in a volcano area. Similar to Death Mountain Crater from Ocarina of Time.
There is a game mechanic where you must choose one of the three goddesses to support. I’ve chosen Farore.
She has a large wizardly looking hat. This outfit that has the best stats, but there is another more simple one with tan cloth.
There is a menu screen similar to Final Fantasy. I’m using an item called token and it teaches a move with very high special attack called Prometheus. But it won't be active until tomorrow. I understand this to mean tomorrow, real world time (not game time).
To progress, you have to equip and unequip specific gear to show support to your goddess and then talk to npcs by doors leading deeper into the mountain.
My point of view is similar to Pokemon now, where there are trainers that must be defeated with the gear equipped.
Din’s trainer is a bulky looking bald guy, and he is the last one I need to defeat.
The doors have opened pre-emptively but I go to defeat the last trainer anyway for the experience points.

Fragment:
I’m in a park area, and there is a bulletin board in front of me. There is a war happening. Chaotic scene.

non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid FA / AP

I am invited (more like kidnapped) by a Russian criminal whom I have a history with. I think I am an hacker, I did some work for him once and he fell in love with me, but now I'm not sure if he is trying to help me for old time sake or using me as a scapegoat for his dirty work.
He says he'll release a virus in the world that will wreak havoc on all systems and asks me if I have any old PC with a floppy disk drive and I say I do. So he hands me a floppy disk which he says contains the antivirus. He tells me to use it on my computer and then I'll be safe. I find it really suspicious, because it will make no damn difference to have a working computer if the whole society collapses. There might not even be electricity if his plan works. But I'm scared for my life and I just wanna leave and go home.
I know my face will be everywhere on CIA screens for being here, so he is probably setting me up or using me as a decoy. I hide the disk the best I can, so that any camera that might film me outside doesn't see it. When I reach my flat, I turn on the news and chaos starts unraveling in the world. Banks crash and other services start failing, people flock to the roads trying to go somewhere safe. I just wanna go meet my parents and ensure they're fine, but it's still a bit far and there is almost no way to get through the traffic jams. I wait a bit and go out by foot to get some stuff and prepare my trip. When I return my house has been searched. They tried to be discreet as not to denounce themselves, but I can tell that a lot of things are misplaced. I still have the disk with me and don't know what to do with it. I manage to go out of town through a road that most people are taking in the opposite direction. I fear I might not have enough fuel, but I manage most of the way, then need to walk the final bit. My dad is worried with the chaos and showing me how they reinforced the front door and windows of the house, but when I go into the backyard to hang something to dry I notice there is one door from the outside to the corridor / garage leading to the yard that doesn't have any lock. We have our dogs there, who are like different incarnations of my RL dogs Hachi and Bernardo, and are also kept separate because they also don't like each other here (my parents here also look like my RL parents, but we are totally different people and live in a totally different world). I rush to tell my dad that door needs to have a lock asap as outside people are starting to loot.