non-lucid

I've been writing up my dreams on word on my computer when I wake up... This was last nights dream. The weirdest thing that I have to note about this was the extremely real sensations o.o;' And how it felt like I really was struggling to breathe... Bizarre x.x;

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I was in some sort of resort place, and it was almost like a caravan park of sorts. I was pregnant with twins, and I know that I was full term, but I kept walking up to people and rubbing it going, 'Look at my belly! Isn't it beautiful!' But something happenned, something was wrong with the babies; So I had to be rushed away in the car to some sort of hospital place but it wasn't really a hospital. I can't remember the faces clearly enough, but I do know when I was lying on the bed one woman kept telling me to push, but I didn't understand how I could do that. I sort of pointed at my belly, and tensed my muscles but nothing happenned and I became confused.. It looked like I was having to a c-section instead.

I wrestled with a nurse or something because they put one of those heart monitor stickers down my throat, or some food tube. At first it was horrible and I felt like I was going to choke but once it lodged itself properly I could breathe clear again and they put more heart monitor stickers on me and hooked me up to the machine. It kept track of three heartbeats, the two babies hearts were okay; but mines kept fluttering on and off. I felt my heart sort of jump a bit in the dream too. The dream changed before I actually gave birth but the memory of the other dream I had has faded, but I'm sure it had something to do with Daniel (My boyfriend).

Um...decent transition minus the fact that I'm wrestling with the demon HI that I was experiencing while trying to wild. I choked it out, walked out side and threw it across the street. And lost complete lucidity. I get back to the house, and notice trees have been moved, everything seems a bit out of place, but it doesn't trigger lucidity. I go into my room, and there's a girl who's been changed into a horse. I guess I have to take care of her or something. Finally she starts talking to me...recall is spotty so I don't know what we talked about....and then there's a transition.

There's a cartoon about how this couple on a hot air balloon had to eat food, and the only thing the guy supplied was alcohol. Then it switches to them driving around every where in this snowy place drunk. Everyone is singing, and everyone else is drunk. Now I'm on a bus (and things look real again) and this girl starts singing:

www.youtube.com/watch?v=9HmJQyS8QVw

I joined in and she was smiling, everyone on the bus started singing. Some of the words were off, and someone said there are different versions of the song. Later on I'm at a club, and this girl I'm with is buying me drinks. She's one of those "obviously gay...has to dress more like a guy than me" types. Cat Williams was there, along with some other stars. We stayed there till it closed, and the scene faded.

I woke up at D's house. B was there, and I think um....I can't even think of this chicks name....small petite, Puerto Rican....had her phone number, but just didn't get anywhere with her. Anyways, I spent a little time talking to both of them about last night, and how many drinks we had.

Since I'm in the midst of spring break right now, a school dream wasn't particularly pleasant.
I was at school. Although the first parts of the dream are foggy, after those I remember being in my Japanese classroom. There was a big hole in the wall that led to a tunnel, and apparently students had to race through it to see who would win. I decided to give it a shot. The first couple of laps were a piece of cake, and I was smoking everyone there. On the third and final lap, I heard a kid I dislike and another kid who I know but have never talked to. They were talking about me.
"That Tanner sure is a competitive one."
"Tanner? Yeah, I guess."
"Even if he's an idiot, he's still competitive."
I was very peeved off by that, but I didn't turn around to insult him, and instead kept staring at the tunnel waiting for the race to start. It had surprised me that he had said that, since in real life that kid is nice to just about everyone.
The final lap started, and I was almost going to win the race by the end of it, but it was called off and everyone scrambled out of there. As I was making my way through the crowd, I saw my girlfriend, who for some reason had long, blonde hair (whereas in real life she has short, black hair). I didn't think it strange, however, and hugged her tight when I saw her. We walked and talked for a while, until eventually we had to go to class.
For some reason, as I was walking to my English class, I was suddenly wearing nothing but my underwear, although once again, I didn't find this strange. I walked into my English class only to be greeted by a new teacher who I had never seen before. I forget what his name was in the dream (started with an R), but he was a young man, about 22 or so, with a patch beard and short, dark brown hair. The class was rearranged differently, and all along the sides were computers that the kids were using to goof off on the internet. I grabbed a chair and waited for the bell to ring.
There's also a brief snippit of dream that I remember (can't recall if it was part of the school dream or not) that involved me and my friend riding across long stretches of road on bikes.

Last night, well more like this morning I woke up, not during a dream though, however I thought I'd get up to attempt a WBTB, it didn't work. I did have a very long and vivid dream though, some I remember well and some just fragments, it went as such.

There had been a murder, I didn't know who the victim was or why they'd been killed, but I was on site applying for a job as a telehandler driver - had an interview irl a couple of days ago - and I saw that the Lightman group were on the case, Cal approached me and asked me if I'd like a job with him - BONUS - of course I said no way loser. As if, I jumped at the chance. So he gave me a mobile phone and told me it was his secret to telling if people were lying, what you did was start an app before the questioning and leave it in your pocket, as the questioned were answered, if the person was lying, get this, it set of a screeching alarm that could be heard from like a mile away. I wondered why it wouldn't just discreetly vibrate in your pocket to which Cal said "It's my app, it'll do as I want." I made no argument.

This is where it gets a bit weird and fragmented. It was lunch time and everyone was leaving, I went to put on my boot - were on site remember - and I couldn't find them. So off I go, barefooted looking for my boots, I searched everywhere, found ones that were too small or just single ones and then, along the roadside I found a display, it was of Frankenstein, he was about my size, so you guessed it, I decided to steal his boots, apart from they were alligator skin, pointed toe ones and as I was taking them off his feet a van pulled up. I acted as innocent as I could and they make the observation that people normally try to steal them, which put me off due to guilt. My phone rang, I was Cal, I couldn't hear him in the slightest - I wonder if that's a dream thing, has anyone had a clear phone call in a dream? - so I hung up. He then messaged me, which was also garbled although I got the jist that he was going to let me go already, so I messaged him back saying that he could use his gfeat app to tell if I was lying. I hung up and continued searching for him, my phone rang again and I woke to my alarm going off. Make of it what you will.

first i am trying to sneak in to a children's arcade. i don't remember anything else about this dream.

then i am on a hilly cliff-edge with a woman who seems vaguely familiar. the ground is blanketed with snow. there are several white and orange cats roaming around. we realize the cats are coming from an area further ahead so we follow the path to there, but we find that it is blocked by thick shrubs. the woman remarks she hopes to get into that area someday. the ground slopes softly to the right and we walk down there, but as we continue down the slope we gain momentum and lose control. the woman slips and accidentally touches a snake. there are 3 snakes here: one with yellow and black stripes, which she touched; one tawny brown coloured; and one whose pattern i don't remember. the woman is afraid the snake is venomous and she wants to get medical attention. i follow her to a building that resembles my school; it is night now. i have brought the snake corpses with me. at some point they turn to globs of pink flesh. i enter the school and the woman is gone. there are two boys at the top of a stairway with a metal bucket. they instruct me to put the flesh in the bucket and i do so.

then i am outside the school again with a girl. we see a dead man's body and i remove another glob of flesh from it. this one is lighter pink and fat-streaked. as we reenter the school the girl remarks that i should hide it, so they don't know i'm adding human flesh to the bucket. i try to throw it into the bucket when the boys aren't looking, but i miss. they don't seem put off by the fact that it's human flesh, however.

i wake up with severe abdominal pain.
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short analysis:
in the dream i considered the snowy landscape to be part of the dominican republic. this explains the presence of snakes and is attributable to the fact that a friend who had visited gave me a ring from there the day previous.

the brown snake looked and moved exactly like a large snake i saw in a forest a year or so ago (i live in ontario-- generally the only snakes you encounter here are tiny green garter snakes - this one was brown, 5 or 6 inches around and quite long... unusual sight to see on a walk in the forest. it didn't scare me at all, in fact i was curious -- and in this dream i adopted the same attitude towards the snakes, although the woman was terrified).

the dead body and the globs of flesh didn't disturb me in the dream; it was all very matter-of-fact. i wonder, upon waking, if these images of bodily mutilation can be explained by the severe pain i was experiencing. although i did not feel any pain in the dream, the body-horror type images could have been a sort of alternate perception of it -- a symbol of pain, so to speak.

So after my nap i did reality checks and i was recalling non-lucid dreams from it, and i accidentally fell asleep without noticing it(lack of sleep earlier didn't helped, duh). I got up since i already did reality checks and looked at time, it was 1:00, which couldn't have been since i started my nap later than that, i started walking towards balcony while looking at hands, fingers were strangely bended. Then i woke up. Couldn't recall non-lucids from that, but hey, got one more lucid dream.

I dreamed that I was talking to my boss Bill (I have more that one man I consider my boss at my work - this one likes to say "Remember, it's all bullshit."

What were we talking about in my dream? I remembered that clearly a moment ago, but then I moved to write it down. Was it dream interpretation? Was it the interpretation of the situation at my work? Anyway, I remember a sense of agreement. Which is as it is I waking life: Bill and I I think are on the same page mostly at least about assessment of situation there I think.

Damn it! I had already written 4-5 paragraphs of this when it got deleted. I don't feel motivated to go into my dream snippets with as much detail and gusto, but I'll try (yayyy enthusiasm ). To summarize, I have 4 dream fragments, some of which were chained between waking, and I remembered more but they faded before I could record. I promise it'll be have mas detalles manana. Until then, adios

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I am walking in a planetarium/mall, with train tracks looping across the floor, and planets of various shapes and sizes hanging from the ceiling. At some point, I am on a tour, but am ignoring the annoying, overenthusiastic tour guide to play with a piece of red lint on my jacket (much more interesting, I know). I eventually wander off and make it into a room with a giant, rancor-like monster situated in the dead center. There are oblivious pedestrians streaming past him, and he is growling menacingly to deaf ears. For some reason, I can drop a tab down over him, listing his name and "level", which is 594.

I am in a public bathroom similar to one at my soccer academy in waking life. As I walk past the vacant urinals (with no dividers, for some reason), I stop near to the end, taking a piss. As I do this, I notice a young couple studiously swapping spit in the dead center of the bathroom. Not thinking it odd, I zip up and leave (dream germs are dangerous too, kiddies).

*I wake up at this point, get some water, and record the first two dreams*

I am back outside the bathroom with some friends, wanting to investigate a scream. When we go in, we see the woman has been brutally murdered, and there appears to be a teeth-shaped cavity in her arm (nope, no zombies, sorry). For some reason, I think suspicion might fall on me, and eagerly run to a table that has appeared in the middle of the room and hold up my axe (apparently I own one), to show it is clean and unbloodied. I then point to the man from earlier, holding an bloody axe and standing over the woman's body, blood dripping from his mouth.

*At this point I wake up again*

I have somehow learned that the man is similar to an x-files monster of the week, and in addition to being a cannibal, gets most of his energy from electricity. The bathroom lights are out, and when I run outside, the door leads out of my house, and I am in my neighborhood. I run out into the cul de sac and scream at each of the neighbor's driveway in turn; "Turn it OFF", as they comply. I do this with 3 houses, then get up to the house where a quite attractive girl lives. We've had an on-again, off-again relationship, and seeing her in the dream is apparently enough to make me completely forget about the crazed, electrically charged cannibal that was running behind me moments before. As I approach her driveway, I see her and her dad going to get the mail. I run up and talk to them a bit, and somehow we are all sitting on the pavement by their mailbox, limbs all tangled together improbably. At this point, my alarm goes off, and I realize I'm knotted in blankets.

I don't know what was going on, but my SGTs were made at me about something. I ended up getting my ass handed to me. I was wearing glasses, and they broke them. The next day they took mem to get some more. I was pissed off and sad at the same time. Just felt horrible.

I wake up in my bed. My teeth hurt. I licked them and felt the texture on their surface wasn't clean and smooth like they are supposed to. There was something dirty on them, leaving them textured and tasting like iron. I walk downstairs to look in a mirror. It's evening, but there is just enough dim light to let me see my mouth. Red of blood, my lips opened to show my deformed and fully blood-covered teeth - at least the few I had. My set of teeth was shaped like a rabbit's. I went into the kitchen where my mother said I must have grabbed and chewed apart this weird salt grinder-like wooden thing while I slept. I went into the living room and sat in the couch with the salt shaker thing in my hands. My father walked in and asked what happened to my teeth, so I explained what I must have been doing while sleeping.

I'm sitting in a bus, looking at my cellphone, which in this dream is an old flippidy-floppedy silver model. The windows are pitch black and the bus is only lit up by the long orange-yellow lamps. The cellphone shows a message I had written to Cecilie a day ago in the dream, which asks her if she would like to go out with me this weekend. I'm about to write something to discard or excuse my message, when someone on the seat on the opposite side of the bus to my left says:
"I would love to go out with you this weekend," and there sits Cecilie in all her blonde glory, almost like she was illuminated by some holy light. Her voice made me feel relieved and ecstatic. She was beautiful, but she looked.. older.
"Where would you like to take me?" she asks and moves onto the seat next to me. The more I looked at her face, the less attractive she was. For each time I looked at her face, it looked more worn and old, yet in very subtle steps. Imagine a meth addict whose skin gradually turns ugly. She ended up looking like a different person, and I'm not sure, but I think her blonde hair got a few shades closer to light brown.
"I'm not sure. Any suggestions?" I reply.
"We'll find out," she ensures. We spend the rest of the dream browsing images on my cellphone.

Side note: I did once ask this if she was doing anything in the following weekend. She was busy but I backed down when she couldn't understand I wanted to ask her out. Looking back at how she had treated me even before I tried to ask her out (and even worse after), although I didn't realize it at the time, I think it was a good idea not to pull through.

During day: 5xRCs including DS review

Dream recall technique: none used, remembered 2 dreams

Total sleep time: 7+hrs

After being too lazy or tired in the last few days, I decided it's time to try to WILD again. Set the alarm clock to wake me 5hrs after going to bed, woke up, stayed awake for a few mins (I avoid waking myself too much because I really cannot fall asleep afterwards), then went back to bed, repeating a mantra. I fell asleep.

Dream1: I am in someplace which is my dream home and I am going to bed trying to WILD, blankets all around me, mobile phones, watches showing the time. Then I wake up in the dream, I am in the car with my dad who is driving me somewhere. How strange I think, I really can't remember what I did or where I have been before that. I look at a watch and it's five hours later than when I went to bed in the dream. “It’s like I have lost five hours of my life”, I am thinking to myself.

My parents are cooking dinner in an unknown building in our old neighbourhood. I want to WILD and initially lay my blankets on the roof of a building, trying to relax there. Somehow I am teleported where my parents are and they make a lot of noise so I can't fall asleep. We watch a large part of something, the size of window, fly off and crash on our neighbors’ roof. It is my fault [of course!] because I have forgotten to close the windows so the wind blew that part away. I remember in the dream that I have closed the windows and start telling this to my dad. We go to my parents’ bedroom where the neighbors are also visible and have a look at the windows.

The wind is so strong that I am afraid that everything will start flying off in different directions. I close the windows, but as soon as I do they open again. The frame looks pretty broken. My dad says he will put something on the windows so the windows can't be used again. This saddens me because I won't be able to look at the sunset anymore, so I tell him. I look in the direction of the sunset and a see a larger than usual sun, more yellowish less bright with some details visible. I remember not to stare at it too long because it's bad for the eyes.

A few blocks away I see a huge tornado just starting to form. Oh, no! It's far but it is coming, so I tell my parents we should go somewhere else. Then I start wasting time, trying to grab my blanket, looking around for other stuff. The tornado is getting closer really fast. It has a scary destructive force, I see it passing over and through a row of houses, there are sound and sight of implosions and the houses are completely destroyed. There is very little chance to make it if we stay in the building. Better try to run outside. So I do.

I find myself in another building, facing a boy. I consider this to be a bit strange but go on my way as I see the scary gray mist swirling around. There is an expensive section in this building something like a cafe for special people. Next to it is the exit. I am running from the windows where the tornado is towards the cafe /exit. I rush through the cafe shouting “Get out, now!” to the woman who works there. There are three very strange looking kids that have been left there by their ultra rich parents. I try to take them with me but they don't react, just stare there with blank faces, so I leave them at the table. One of the employees of the cafe tells me that all is safe outside, so I urge her to look around the corner to confirm. She doesn't want to do that. I do it myself. No swirling or tornado coming yet, so I walk a bit, but as I cross the street I see it is getting nearby, a fast moving mist rather than a tornado, so I launch myself forward, jump some fences and continue running...[end]

I woke up after this, since I had no WILD success again I just decided to sleep some more. I forgot any other dreams. It was time to wake up but I pressed the alarm for one more snooze. 9 mins to go. (By the way I thought I could change the snooze settings but can't figure how to do so). I am not attempting to LD, I really don't care at this point.

Dream2 Snooze DILD: I am in a car parked near my parents' current place, my alarm clocks are all around me again. My teacher is trying to reach me on the phone in the dream. I know that I will soon wake up so I don't bother picking up. I am staring at the sky. Is it a spaceship? A strange object is flying around, it looks like a flying truck, how can that be? My awareness is trying to awake. I follow the flight of this truck until it lands in the yard nearby. At that point I know that I am dreaming! An older DC man is in the truck, he reminds me of some unknown famous actor, also looks angry and menacing. He comes to me looking somewhat aggressive. I am really tired of all the chasing around, so I just intend him to be a nice guy, and to my amazement he decides to take it easy. The car where I am begins sliding down the road, but the yard end/road entrance is too narrow for it to pass. I somehow try to size the car down, it becomes very long and thin and I am amazed at this transformation. I stop the car and go to my room in my parents place.

No idea why I decided to go there. Now, in front of me is a gray cloud forming, starting to look scary. I remember the tornado fear, so this is unpleasant. I am still lucid although getting distracted by the cloud, when I remember not to give in. I try to make the cloud go away. In this case, I am stronger so it cannot do anything and just vanishes.

I somehow start unintentionally creating clouds. Those look like real clouds from far away, different hues and shades on the cloud, partly lit by the sun, etc. I also hear the sound of distant thunder coming from the mini vivid cloud in front of me, I really like that. I am having a moment of great enjoyment creating these clouds making them appear from my hands as if they were a ball of cloud, there is also some dark blue light sparkling. I do this quite a few times until I get exhausted and cannot do it anymore. I am still lucid, but am beginning to lose concentration, so I decide to get out of there and go to the street.

I am on the street. A rather unpleasant looking DC decides he will accompany me to wherever I am going. The only task from my list that I remember to do is to summon a certain DC and ask him a pre-determined question. I start calling out for the DC to appear, nothing. I try again, no result. I ask the ugly DC next to me where is the DC I am trying to summon. Of course, he doesn't know. I don't like that, but I nevertheless decide to ask him the question I had in mind. He answers something nonsensical. I try to have a conversation with him, but I find it hard to hear or understand what he says. We probably exchanged no more than a few sentence and I notice in the dream that I start forgetting what he said. [Very strange, I guess there is place for only one two questions at a time]

I wonder how I am still here on the street for what feels like so long and the dream is still here, I am happy about that. I notice two tall guys with black scarves around their heads walking towards us. I notice how out of order this looks and smile to myself, how easy it is to spot inconsistencies while I am lucid now. I try to stop them maybe talk to them, but they insist on continuing on their way, strong momentum so making them stop is really hard. Still no alarm clock interfering, I expect it to ring any moment. I get distracted thinking and then find myself in darkness, feeling my body. My eyes are still closed and I try to DEILD but no success.

I look at my alarm clock, two minutes to the alarm? I jump out of bed trying to hold on to the dream memory, which today feels very evasive as the dreams begin to erase themselves.

Final remarks: Dream control today was really good, tried out the tips to make the chaser a nice guy, which worked in this LD. I also think that reading posts and this tutorial on dream control http://www.dreamviews.com/wiki/Dream-Control-Tutorial helped!

Practices: ADA, Mindfulness, WBTB, DEILD
While falling asleep, mantra: "I am aware"

Dream #1 - I am with my friend, R__. She's driving a car - one belonging to one of my relatives, according to my dream-memory, but in real life none of them own a gray minivan. We're driving around a mall parking lot. We can't seem to find a parking space. She accidentally hits another car while pulling into a parking space, and I cringe at the sound, but she's more angry about it than worried. She decides to try to use a note left on her windshield to explain why she parked in one of the restricted parking spots, by claiming she can't walk that far, but I don't think that will hold up under scrutiny. She finally gives up and parks pretty far away from the mall entrance. We can see it from where we are, but it's quite a walk.

I briefly wake up from the dream and try to carry my awareness with me into my next dream, using my mantra.

As soon as the dream reforms, I am instantly lucid. I'm inside of the mall from the previous dream, but R__ is gone now. The lucid dream has the crystal clarity characteristic of my lucid. Since I'm not outdoors (unusual), rather than the usual sweeping landscapes and storm-swept skies, instead the architecture inside of the mall is extremely grand. Super high vaulted ceilings, probably 80-100 feet high, with graceful arches carved out of solid pale pink marble and golden inlays. Intricate carvings and sculptures. White marble floors. The whole thing looks more like the inside of a cathedral than a mall.

I look around and think, "This is definitely a dream". I inspect my hand - it's perfectly formed. I do a reality check by trying to push one hand through the other, but I can't. I shrug it off - I know I'm dreaming. I try to fly, and hover in the air above the crowds milling around the mall. My lucidity tends to fade very quickly while I'm flying, though - there's something about not having my feet on the ground that does that. So I land, and then crawl on the floor and inspect the marble tiles. There's grime between them and they feel a little gritty - this place needs to be swept and mopped.

I decide to go treasure hunting. I reach into my back pocket - for some reason, I'm wearing a skirt with pockets - and feel around for a map. I feel crumpled paper and tug. I pull out a sheet of notebook paper, folded in half several times, and unfold it. There is a map on it, scribbled in blue pen, but I can't read what it says. It also has little pictures. I decide that I need to go find a dream character who CAN read it, and if I'm going to treasure hunt, I'm going to do it in style - which means having a whole group of treasure hunters with me. I run my hand along the wall as I walk.

I walk toward the food court - well, an archway I have decided is the food court. The floor slopes downward between it in a ramp, heading underground. I can see tables in the distance. I decide that's kind of boring and want it to be something more exciting. As I approach, it morphs into a Viking style beer hall. I'm pretty satisfied - this is definitely more fun.

I enter the beer hall, which is smokey and full of warriors eating and drinking. There is an empty space in the middle with a fire-pit that looks like it's used by entertainers - wrestlers, musicians, etc. The benches on either side are elevated on steps, sort of like bleachers, so everybody can see. Nobody is performing right now, though.

I see a group of 5 or 6 Tolkein-style Dwarves over to one side. They look like they're having a pretty good time. I approach them and introduce myself. Their leader is a pretty buff looking Dwarf. He has long, thick braided brown hair and is wearing a sort of heavy brown leather harness that has what looks like a lion's mane stitched around the neck and shoulders. He greets me respectfully:
"I am Lokmin, son of (I can't remember his dad's name)." He thumps his chest (which is more Roman, I guess, but whatever).
I hold out my treasure map. "I've found a map to potential treasure, but it might be dangerous."
The Dwarves deliberate over my wrinkled sheet of notebook paper, making sounds of interest and approval. Lokmin looks like he's about to make the decision to follow me...

But unfortunately, we never got to find the treasure. I live near an airport - one of the EXTREMELY LOUD jets that I LOATHE flies overhead, waking me up and ending my lucid dream. I was pretty upset. Even now there's another really loud jet flying overhead. I hate those things, and the airport by extension (it wasn't always noisy here - they moved the flight paths).

I go back to sleep, trying to re-enter the dream, but I'm too irritated to focus.


Dream #3 - I dream that I am taking naked photographs of myself using my laptop camera and didn't realize the curtain across the sliding glass door in the living room was sheer. I figure either nobody saw me, or they didn't care.

non lucid
*Jumped by two blacks dude and prayed to reborn in sukhavati.
*Used a shower that took up the whole bathroom.

Got to sleep later than usual due to some credit card stuff and thus had to use an alarm.

I recall being in cave system of some sort and later there was minigame where i had to control small sphere that moved around area and collected chess pieces, also there were pink chess pieces that automatically collected all other chess pieces on in the view when collected.
Then i had some kind of discussion with LV and there was video of an AI playing through ESP Ra.De.(a shmup game) , the AI's name was 'Queen ESP Ra.De.'.