non-lucid

I'm pretty sure I just had my first lucid dream. It seemed kind of long at the time but I may only remember some bits and pieces now, gonna try to get down as much as I can. And it's weird, it feels so foggy now. Was a very intriguing experience. There was another dream before it but I want to get down as much of the lucid as I can so I'm writing it first.

I'm trying to recall what it was that triggered the reality check. I think it was that I was laying in bed or on the phone with my wife and she said something absurd (I think it had something to do with her saying she was on her way home from class at university, and I quickly realized she doesn't go to school in reality) that caused me to quickly consider that this isn't real and pull a nose-pinch reality check. I was able to breathe like my nose was just a little stuffy despite the nose-pinch. There was an obligatory, "Holy shit, I'm lucid!" moment. To keep the dream from fading from excitement and to calm down, I closed my eyes and (for whatever reason) pictured a topographical map key. Feeling it was stable, I opened my eyes, did another reality check (marveling of course at how weird it was to be breathing through a pinched nose, and then started wandering my environment. I seemed to be in what looked and felt like my old house on Broadway. I was a little unprepared for my first lucid; I hadn't thought of anything cool to do. The first thing I did was go into the bathroom. I figured since I was lucid I might as well start playing around with how well I could control it. I went to the door of the bathroom and decided I'd summon something on the floor outside and close the door to see if it appeared; I arbitrarily chose cake, and then I sort of glanced up and back down and it was there on the floor, slightly stale and with a big slice missing--I didn't even have to close the door. Happy, I went to the big picture window out front and continued experimenting by swapping between night and day by closing my eyes for a second then looking at the sky. I noted some unusual mixed success, namely whenever I wanted it to be day or night it would literally only be just starting day or night (ie at dawn or dusk). It's a little foggy if there was something occurring between now and what happened next, but the next thing I remember was that I was quickly running out of ideas for things to do, so I thought, "Well, I've always wanted to experience sex as a woman, let's give that a try." So I went back to the bathroom (it's notable that the previous time it was the bathroom from the old Broadway house, but it was now the bathroom from my previous apartment on Oak Street), stripped down, then looked in the mirror. Quick comment after the fact, the mirror worked just fine for its purpose in the dream, but before transforming I started in my normal dream avatar--which is myself as I recognize but much thinner. I was able to transform myself by pointing to the parts of my body that I wanted to transform and focusing on them. I started with breasts, then moved on to my penis. I recall being amused/annoyed that as I was shrinking my penis my foreskin wasn't shrinking with it so I had to do that separate. I started to get a little impatient so I just waved my hand around in front of my crotch and looked up at the ceiling to try to speed things up. Eventually everything looked pretty good, wasn't perfect, and I noticed that at some point I had lost all my body hair without intentionally trying to, but it was good enough for a first attempt. I was trying to decide what I wanted to do first with my new body when I noticed I sorta needed to pee so I decided to get that out of the way first, so I did. Just that was an unusual new physical sensation. There was some toilet paper sitting in the bathtub next to the toilet, so I grabbed some to clean things up a bit (since I was planning to shortly be playing around down there soon anyways); as I was cleaning up the phone rang and I answered it. The voice on the other end was some woman trying to tell me about how there were cloths in the tub that I could use for whatever but to leave them there so she could wash them later (I noticed here that it was hard to focus on what was happening now while I was on the phone trying to listen). I looked back into the tub and the toilet paper had been replaced by dark blue cloth. I shortly regretted flushing a few of them down the toilet. I checked the mirror one last time to see if things were still good and then went back out to the living room. I'm think there may have been somewhere here where I experimented with my new body, but if so unfortunately I don't remember it. Eventually there appeared in my house (as though she was familiar with the place) a thin, light-skinned black girl. Delighted to find another person to help me experiment with my new body, I asked her if she wanted to have sex with me. She seemed apprehensive; focusing on her I first removed her clothes then, noting of course that she too was female and thus would make proper copulation difficult, made her instantly grow a penis. She wasn't very amused by this, however, and she angrily stormed off to the basement. Shrugging, and once again bored, I decided to turn my attention on mentally recreating graphic-update remakes of old school video games I love in my mind for entertainment. I started with what I assume was Final Fantasy 6, though thinking on it after the fact the action doesn't match up properly with the game (though I specifically recall Terra's appearance). At some point this was interrupted with my wife calling, when she called what had been the video game scene taking up my entire stream of consciousness suddenly appeared as though I'd taken it out of full-screen mode on my monitor on my computer at my current apartment. I even had my headphones on, so I had to remove one of side of them to expose an ear for the phone like I usually do. I was annoyed at the distraction but answered the phone anyways. I don't remember the contents of the actual phone message, but I note again after the fact that it started to break my lucid concentration. The last part I remember now was going down to the basement where I found the black girl (who had now been transformed into some sort of small Pokémon-like creature) cuddling on a table with another small Pokémon-like creature. Saying, "Oh, so you'll have sex with him but not me!" and did my own storming-off-angrily upstairs and back to the living room, where I waved my hand and did some sort of mental slash across the table they were lying on and killing them both. My memory of this dream ends here, though when I woke I seemed to think that there was more non-lucid dream that came after this. I awoke just prior to starting this journal entry and did a quick reality check that passed, officially ending my first lucid dream.

Note to self: be wary about answering phones once you're lucid; it seems to help break lucid focus. In fact, I'm going to try to make an effort to start reality checks whenever answering and/or ending phone calls. I'm going to try to remember that the next thing on my agenda for practice when a dream goes lucid is controlling the environment; this time I kind of let the environment do what it wanted around me.

There was a dream sequence either prior to or leading up to where it went lucid. There was a long prelude to most of what I remember, but the bulk of what I remember was that there was this stretch of interstate that I would drive down as though I was in a GTA-ish sandbox type game and try to score points on this segment of highway. The segment of highway was kind of a long straight section with a curve off to the right. I'm thinking I may have lost more memory of this dream out of excitement for the lucid one, so maybe more will come back to me later.

22-08-10 Something about dreamers forum, Finding my dream name, telepathic communications with a new user, she asks me to put a program on my computer, this gives acess to game statistics, I thought it would avoid minimising the game if new message received, Niklas from WoW is there explaining to some wisehead that it took ages for a lot of people to find out that beer was his dreamsign and apparently mine too, although I don't recognise this to be true for me.

22-08-10 Something about a competition in exorcism versus a loner played by Sean Penn, kept travelling all over the country. Was somehow also a competition in dreaming so went to the dude's website and gound my dreams to be waay cooler than his. All I really wanted was to be better than this guy. I had a partner, can't remember who it was exactly. I do remember at one point paying extra attention to trees, but never enough to remind myself of a reallity check. Was there something about a graveyard as well, possibly some train traveling, man a bucket load of dreamsigns.

Dream change, it is Christmas and my entire family is together. The kids run around and look for presents on the parking lot outside the communal office and it is bright sunshine (!!!!!!!). They ask me if I brought presents this time, sort of refer to my sisters baby who at this point already is born. “I don't do presents, you all know this!” They then question both my cousins on my mothers side and for some reason especially Heidi is speechless and looks to me for support, I don't quite understand what it is she wants me to do, until she says “Dennis tell them!” They keep looking at her with question marks in her eyes. I say something like “Oh for crying out loud just give them a couple of years of it, they will get used to it”. The entire family starts laughing as we walk into the communal office.

I had like a million dreams last night because I ended up sleeping for around 12 hours
The latest one I remember was something to do with microbiology and eukaryotic and prokaryotic cells and since I knew what they were I could save some company, or something like that
I cannot really be bothered/do not have the time atm to think of and write the others down.

Wet Pillows

I was in a suburb just around the corner from my flat. I was staying at a flat there and tI think people were having some quiet drinks and just chilling. It started raining and there were some people sitting under a tree oblivious to the rain. I think I went to sleep and came back out in the morning. The people were gone but they had been using my pillows to sit on in the dirt and they were all wet and dirty!


Creepy Guy

I was trying to WILD in the morning. I could hear all the guys who had stayed over last night. I slipped into a dream and one of the guys was hooking up with a topless young asian girl. They saw me and she turned to cover up and her whole back was tattooed and even down her legs with this amazing blue sky. There were clouds and birds, it looked real. I went into the lounge and there was this guy maby a little older than me waching tv and his younger sister who was like 7 or 8. She was sitting down infront of the tv. The guy told her to do something and she did it straight away. The guy was amazed, it was like he just realised he could control her or something. He told her to pick up her doll and do something with it. Then I woke up.

Had a bit of trouble remembering my dreams in the morning. I wrote one when I woke up at 5ish but it came out pretty incoherent. I have no idea what this means:

And suddenly I'm tagging along as I follow someone else down what appears to me to be a dream room.

When I woke up in the morning, for good, I had to walk around and really try to remember what I dreamed about. Normally I woulda thought that I wouldn't be able to come up with anything but I managed to remember two more:

I'm visiting some sort of house out in the middle of nowhere where a bunch of people my age are living or at least partying. I'm there to visit and i don't quite fit in. I have a journal I keep with me where I write my secrets and personal stuff. This place is at the end of a very tall hill. Leah is there I think.

I remember at some point we are all in this big open hot tub area that is surrounded by nothing but glass.

So when I finally leave I forget to grab my journal and i am very worried that someone might read it. So I call Leah and ask her to grab it for me.

I'm visiting my mother on what appears to be a mostly abandoned farm. I don't think it's hers but it does seem like she is vacationing there. It sounds like something my mom would do. I walk into the dark grass and there she is tending a bunch of plants that are on a big table. She says something to me but I'm not sure what exactly.

Suddenly I'm in some sort of office building and there seems to be some sort of jurrasic park inspired ride there. It looks like one of those kid roller coasters that take you by little scenes from the movie to try and scare you. I figure I have nothing better to do so i hop on. The ride begins right away and I'm first taken to an exhibit with a raptor. I force myself to scream and laugh and to make it sound like I'm having a good time. I don't know why.

I'm taken by a few more exhibits before I decide this is too lame for me. I hope off of the ride and begin to hoof it outta the building. I don't know why I'm completely alone.

R and T were talking outside my old primary school. T wanted to ask R something but was dodging doing it by conversing in Japanese. Both of them were using really beginner language but they did it perfectly and still managed to communicate quite coherently.
Unlike some non-English dreams I've had I remember clearly that they were actually speaking Japanese and not just something that I believed to be Japanese.
Eventually they had exhausted all of their low level language and rather than become more sophisticated T got to whatever the point of her being there in the first place was and the dream sequence ended.

This is significant to me because normally I only encounter a dream in Japanese when I'm study it a lot right before an exam/assessment but this morning's had no bleed-through effect at all.

21.08.2010

Sexual Medication (Non-lucid)

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID

this one was weird, but completely awesome. i was inside a house, inside some sort of storage room. there were two other people in there with me, i don't remember who the other person was, i just remember him/her being there. the other person however, i do remember. i think she looked like the blonde woman off of a show i saw, i dont really watch it. she was the weird boss woman off of "better off ted", but prettier. i think something was wrong with her. i had to have sex with her, like she needed it as some sort of sexual medication. she was reluctant of the whole thing, she said something like "lets get this over with, just don't even look at me ok?" either she or the other person in the room said that she had to have sex every week, for what purpose im not sure. i walked out of the storage room to see if anyone was around the house, i think i didn't want to get caught. well we started to have sex, trying various positions, but they all sucked, i think it was because i couldn't "penetrate" enough. i then said "why not try the missionary?" lol, don't know why we didn't try that in the first place. we tried that and got some very good results. she was like "there we go!" lol. lets just say that after we tried that, everything got more passionate, touchy, and she didn't seem to care what i did to her. thats all i remember, it started to get choppy after trying the missionary. it was awesome though, very realistic, tactile wise .

19.08.2010

Shooting (Non-lucid)

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID

this one was pretty vivid at first, but it gets foggy near the end. it starts in my house, theres someone dangerous nearby, like a robber or killer. i have a revolver in my hand, but its empty. i started at home, in the livingroom, so i headed towards the office, i think i was walking backwards, i never took my eyes off of the livingroom once. when i got into the office, i started to make the motions of reloading the gun (i wasn't really loading it, but somehow the bullets got in there. i didn't see anything as i was still looking at the livingroom). when it was loaded i did the cliched spinning and walked back to the livingroom. then suddenly a man jumped out from somewhere in the livingroom, i was still in the dining room. i didn't hesitate, i aimed and emptied the gun into his chest. he hit the ground as i walked into the livingroom, and i started to leave the house. but when i looked back, the dead man was replaced by a seductive woman, half naked, silently beckoning me to her. i started to have sex with her, but for some reason, she was transforming into someone else. i stopped it by visualizing her, it was weird, i was controlling the dream without being lucid. then, i suddenly heared someone coming downstairs. i hurried and got dressed, and the woman was no longer there. before i had heared someone coming from upstairs, i had the feeling that i wasn't actually having sex with anyone, that it was just my imagination. when my stepdad came downstairs, the woman was gone, and i was dressed, thinking to myself "phew, that would have been awkward, someone walking in on you having sex with no one" lol. then my mom came down, and they were accesing the damage of what looked like a robbery. everything was turned upsidedown and flipped everywhere. my stepdad kept stating obvious hints that it was all my fault. what a douche

19.08.2010

Store with aunt (Non-lucid)

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID

this one is just bits and pieces in the beginning, but it gets better in the end. it starts in a store, i think one similar to Walmart, but i never saw any signs. im with my aunt and some of her kids and some of my cousins, all little kids. we were all shopping together, thats all i remember of the beginning. then, somehow i got around five dollars, maybe more. i was walking around a certain section of the store, looking for a fish to buy, as a present i think. the fish area was enormus, it had fish tanks stacked up to the ceiling left and right. the fish were all too expensive unfortunately, they all were $6 and up. my dream wasn't like other dreams, everyone always says they can't read text in dreams. i could clearly see every price tag, they all had a price next to it and said "per Lb", completely normal. anyway, i continued my search for a fish, leading me into this underground, museum type aquarium. there were some people from school there, it was like a field trip or something. i remember leaving the aquarium and returning to my aunt fishless. thats all i remember.

19.08.2010

HAAAAAAA!!!!! (Non-lucid)

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID

this one was funny. i was at a school, i think it was after school hours, because there was an after school group setting up for a meeting. i saw a man standing at a podium, he looked scary, i think he looked like the main character off of "Burn Notice". it was a religious group, i looked at a sign, and it appeared that the group was called "HAAAAAAAA!!!!!!" lol. strange name, i know. i sat down in one of the chairs, apparently i was in the group. after a long memory gap, im outside the school, sitting outside a smaller building, at the top of some steps. there were two people with me, people from the group, they were giving me stuff to look over, information i needed to know or whatever. one of them was a girl, i knew her from my actual school. she gave me what looked like a bible, and told me to read it and look over the notes on the sides. after another memory gap, im sitting on the same steps, reading the book she gave me, then some people pull into the parkiong lot in a black car. thats all i remember.

19.08.2010

Restaurant (Non-lucid)

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID

this one starts out in a restaurant, im at the front, about to get a table. theres a guy who had just walked up to me standing there, he was a friend of some sort. he was waiting for me to get a table, but (somehow i knew) he was fretting over me seeing who he was eating with. he took me anyway and i followed him to his table, where i saw my neighbor eating with him, which i couldnt care less, im not sure why he was so nervous about me seeing her with him.

16.08.2010

Poisoned at the Farmers Market (Non-lucid)

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID

this one was strange. it starts in my stepdads truck. im with him and my mom, and were pulling into what looks like a farmers market, maybe a peach farm. anyway we get out and go into this house. then after a memory gap, us and a bunch of people are gathered around the living room, eating some sort of food, i think it was some kind of cobbler, possibly peach or cherry. then all of a sudden, all of the adults in the room doubled over and died, except my parents, and this one blonde woman, i remembered seeing her earlier in the dream. there were several kids in the room also, and they weren't screaming, which was weird. then, the woman said to the kids "ok, you're free!" then she said something else, i don't remember. i then asked the kid next to me if he was gonna eat his food, he gave it to me, i then asked the woman if it was safe to eat. it was. apparently she poisoned nearly all of the adults there, like they were evil or something. thats all i remember.

16.08.2010

School 2 (Non-lucid)

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID

this one was a long one, but i don't remember much of it. it starts in this cafeteria, but it was different, almost like a fast food place. i kept going up to the counter to buy stuff, the cashier lady was cool, she liked me. the only time remember actually going up there was to get some milk. when i got the milk, the lady pointed out that someone had taken a drink of it and put it back with the others, it was a plastic bottle, with a lid. so i went back and got another one, a full one. then after a memory gap im in a bathroom. its a very big bathroom + locker room, complete with shower section. im in there, but theres a girl in there too, a friend i think in the dream. we were talking, but she had to go take a shower, so she left. i was gonna follow her, because she was hot, but i decided not to after hearing her scream and seeing a fat, hairy, naked guy walk past her (they ruin all the fun ). there were other people in the showers as well i think, mostly men, so i left. then after another memory gap, im outside, theres a lot of people out there, waiting for something to happen. theres a guy sitting next to me, doing some homework, then he asks a girl near me to help him. im like "hey, why not ask me? i know math..." but he ignored me. to be fair, i did sound a bit stupid when i said that. then, the display started. it was a bunch of cheerleaders being thrown in the air, wearing some sort of fat suit, it was weird. thats all i remember.

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID PRECOGNITIVE

Around 0:00 GMT

Nudist beach
Was at a beach with some friends and some people were passing by on the beach, completely naked. I commented with my friends that I didn't know that was allowed on that beach.
[It seems it was precognition, because today I received an invitation from a friend to go to a party at a nudist's beach. I don't think I'm going.]

At 2:40 GMT

Dry riverbed and fries at a snack-bar
Missed the beginning but was crossing a very dry riverbed, thinking that a torrent coming down at that moment would kill me. Some friends were waiting on the other side, which was a hill. [Then a gap] We're at a snack bar on a line choosing what we want to eat. Everybody is choosing fries. I think I shouldn't but end up asking the same thing. I remember it was around 7 EUR all together and I want to pay with a 50 EUR bill. The cashier says she has no exchange and I need to look better and find 10 EUR on my wallet. Then I struggle to get all the coins in the wallet.

Apartments with glass walls and a horse
[Then another gap.] I find myself inside a building, I'm in the hallway and the walls have horizontal glass stripes so I can see to inside the appartments. They are luxurious. Then it gets absurd and I only remember there was a horse in one appartment and my mother discussing with me this was not good - for the horse, I guess.

At 3:50 GMT

Walking house
I'm inside a walking house (ever saw the Walking Castle, from Hayao Myizaki? It was similar). The house stops walking on a hill, everything inside the house is therefore in a steep angle. My mother is the kitchen cooking chickpeas and cabbages. I look for the toilet. I find a big one,with white tiles all over. There are two condoms on the floor, apparently not used. I think I should put them on the garbage, so I pick them up. Then my former boss enters the toilet and I feel embarassed. I explain to her that I was just going to put it in the garbage but she couldn't care less. She just asks me "I need to know if you are working for any corporation." I was "What??? No." Then she kept asking questions but I don't remember anything else. It felt totally absurd and the dream collapsed.

At 5:00 GMT

A secret dream
I had a full length dream, but it's personal so I won't talk about it.

At 7:00 GMT

School/college
I'm with some more people, walking down some street in a strange neighbourhood. We're late for something and apparently I'm the only one who knows where we are going, but can't really remember what it is. I just keep going looking for something familiar. I find the place, it looks like a school. We enter a huge large hallway. Lots
of small children playing and chatting. One little girl touches my butt and I think "Kids don't respect me. They've always treated me as if I'm still one of them. Not even now that I'm almost 30 years old, they don't feel intimidated."
Later I'm in an amphitheatre on a class but no longer with kids but college students. My boyfriend is by my side and one of my old colleagues and friend of mine is in the middle of the room. He is teasing the teacher, who is what I would call a "cougar". He is being ironic about something but she takes it personally and considers he is flirting with her. She gets blushed and leaves the room for a while. When she comes back she has a bigger cleavage and she is clearly flirting with him now. I laugh.
Later I'm on the common room, lot and lots of students, they all look foreign, all blond. I sit by the side of a guy but his girlfriend looks at me with piercing eyes, so I move on. I go up some stairs outside and enjoy jumping around over a metallic structure, that seems to be some strange sculpture but kids use to play.


Another secret dream
I had another secret dream that I won't share. Sorry.

Visiting a foreign city
I'm with my father in some foreign city. He never travels with me, so he was very excited to be there with me this time and insists we must take pictures to remember that special day. We see a structure near a harbour, that is really cool to photograph but he is not getting the right angle, so I tell him to sit there for a while and I go some other way to see it from another angle. On my way I find a very nice pink building that is the Embassy of Switzerland. I still don't know what country we are, but the sign is in English. In front of this embassy, on the other side of the street, there's a kind of fence in stone or concrete and below is a river or canal. I lean against this fence to take a picture of the embassy building but a guard comes and says it's not allowed, so I say ok and move on. Almost reaching my father again I pass by a cute house with a lovely balcony or porch with beautiful plants. I try to get a picture when I see a couple inside and they seem to be arguing about something. The girl gets upset that I'm taking a picture so she starts making grimaces and poses. I realise she is speaking german, but the guy seems to be portuguese. They ruin my picture so I go get to my dad. [Potentially a precognitive dream, to be confirmed in the future.]

1. There was someone trying to break into our house. At first he just tried to go to the front door, ring the doorbell, and have me open it for him, but I saw that he had gun, so I didn't let him in. he went to the neighbors house while I debated with my mom whether or not to call 911. I decided to, but when I got on the phone, it was just a recording of "Beat It" by Michael Jackson. The man came back and broke through the window in my mom's room. I tackled him to try to take his gun, but I couldn't get it. I told my sister to get it from him, but she refused, then my mom took his gun and shot him in the head. He didn't die, so I tried to find the phone to try to call 911 again, but I couldn't find the phone.

2. I was on a pier talking to someone about what kind of sea monsters we can kill. As we were talking, I saw a big white sea monster passing by and it made a very loud noise. When it passed by, the person told me that he could kill those very easily. I told him that every time I tried to kill one of those, I ended up dying.

3. There was a paper clip (it was bent, but it wasn't completely straight) stuck in my arm. I pulled it out, but it broke off half way. I reached my hand in my arm to get the other half of the paper clip. I pulled it out, and then sewed my arm back up. I remember feeling intense pain in my arm while doing this. I don't know if I was sleeping on my arm weird, or what.