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I went to bed later than I usually do last night, and had lots of little dreams about realizing I am dreaming, and then having false awakenings. The only one I remember clearly is that I was at Pizza Ranch(my favorite restaurant) walking out to the car. I realized something strange about the situation, maybe that I wasn't planning on going to Pizza ranch for a while. I looked at my mom, and I realized I was dreaming. I then had a false awakening. This happened a few times, but I can't remember the other times very well.
I was in the city, walking down the street. I saw a hotel resort thing that was supposed to be from Hawaii or something. I saw these bath/shower things in the hotel where you got massages during them. Also, I saw an aquarium with some turtles in it. I remember really wanting to go there. Sometime later in the dream, my dad, brother and I were in the hotel, making sandwiches in it, which was a fragment.
I was in Walmart with my family, shopping for the trip that I just got back from. I got a giant thing of whipped cream. In the Bakery section, I recognized the worker as a Petco worker I see often. I asked her for a piece of cherry pie, and she gave it to me for free. (She gave one to my brother, too.) We were having a lot of trouble agreeing on snacks to bring on the trip. I wanted cake, and my brother and sister wanted chips and tortillas.

I had terrible dream recall last night. Only two dreams remembered, both very short.
One I was at Kohls, looking at a boot sale and seeing none I liked.
I was at a party at my house. My sister and her friends, along with a random boys were playing a board game on the floor in the kitchen. I decided to go upstairs, and I remember having to walk through a lot of people to make it. My friends were upstairs. And that was pretty much all I remembered.

My betta fish was in a tank with another fish, and was fighting. I pulled him out, and yelled at my sister to pour some water into a bowl, which she did. I put the betta in the water, and a bit later my mom came in. She then put the fish into a yogurt container, convinced that it was healthy. I remember being really skeptical. She then poured salad dressing in the yogurt container, and the betta fish somehow survived. A little bit later, the betta was back in the tank, and I was just about to carry the tank back to my bedroom when someone rang the doorbell. It was the family of one of my school enemies. They said, "Merry Christmas!" And I pretty much said thank you and stuff. Then the father of the family raised his hand and said something to me, I can't remember what.

I'm sorry I'm so late guys, I've been on a trip and no time to post.
I am at my friends house and we are anticipating someone to come to inspect her house. I remember seeing the inspectors come out the window. There was one concrete mixer and several cars that came, and parked in a parking lot next to the house. When they came in, it seemed like they were just normal people. They also brought in a lot of dogs and cats. I remember walking with my friend into the kitchen, and seeing one of the "inspector" dogs fall from the ceiling. We laughed when we saw it get up right away, acting as nothing had happened.

1.10.16

Had a day off yesterday, today I have a 6pm-11pm shift. Had a short lucid during morning nap from 10:30 am.

Today I did the same. Slept through night, got up around 8, then back to sofa at 10:20 to WILD then stayed in bed till 11:58.

I guess my subC was starved for lucids because it was just awesome. The sensations from the moment I layed down. Pushing backwards to get the falling feeling was so intense and worked like a charm.

This time I actually got into a lucid with the falling back motion. I think what I did is I leaned back, my headrush went crazy intense, then I straightened back up again and I was in a new dream. Once this didn't work, I was still in the same place, so I decided to stand up and walk away.

First LD - WILD - don't really remember what happened.

Second LD - DEILD - In a second lucid I was sitting in a high chair, like at the bar or barber shop. I just remembered that I wanted to read a book title. I grab a magazine off the counter and start paging through it.

Every page is a full cartoon add for a movie or a DVD. For some reason I think it's not for books. I read them with amusement. At the end I decide to wake up and write them down. So I reach form my pen I prepared and write down at least 6 titles. When I woke up for real, I only remembered "SpongeBob - Under the Sea" and "Iron man". I remember thinking "ooo, Iron Giant, OpheliaBlue loves this one too"

Third LD - DEILD - I also got to meet Payton Manning and 3 of his Broncos teammates, and taught CJ Craig from the West Wing about Lucid dreaming. Also came this close from having sex, but I had too many clothes on.

I was walking on a very wide and long, shiny stone starcase going up. On my left, there were more narrow stairs going down. On top of those stairs was a small platform with chrome railing. 4 football players in Broncos uniforms were standing on it. I was surprised there were no reporters. As I walked by, I recognized Payton Manning, the Broncos quarterback. I panicked and furiously thought about what to give him to sign. I was gonna give him my arm, but I didn't have a pen. So I just said to them "great job, love you guys, the whole team is great". They rolled their eyes and smiled.

I'm sitting next to a tall woman. I realize it's CJ Craig from The West Wing. I ask her if she knows lucid dreaming. I tell her I tell this secret only to people I know they are good. She says yeah, and she tells me what type of dreams she has. I tell her that tha'ts not LDing and proceed to tell her what LDing really is. When you realize while dreaming, that you are dreaming. She was called away, but she asked me if I wanna go with her on the movie set.

Next is a non-lucid. I'm in some building with many rooms. People having sex. I'm thinking I gotta get me some. But I realize I have too many clothes on. Darnet.

This non-lucid was proly last night - I'm with my dad and uncle and others in some hispanic suburb of NY. I look to my left and there is Empire state building with some golden colors on the top, just like in the beginning credits of Sex and the city show.

We are in a european pub and I'm picking beer to drink. First I have is a dark one, next i'm picking a light one. The don't have IPA.

Tonight i dreamt about:

I was in a room, in a restaurant or bar probably, watching how a woman did numbers of money laundry during times of war. She risked her life and still she was doing that job. She could die at any time and she was still laundring money. The numbers were like 500,000 to 125,000, she asked for the rest but the old man told her it was spent in the process. Anyways she kept those numbers on a notepad.

Then i see that a guy called Rick (Theon Greyjoy) comes in the room with a lot of armour. People don't care about him. But then a war enemy comes in alone, Ramsey Snow, and everyone wanted to capture him. He had two blades, he had nothing on top, not even a shirt, and he went to sleep in the same bed with Rick, like if each other protected from everyone. So nobody did a thing even though they wanted to.

On another dream i was with my father and his business partner. We were on a restaurant at night, perhaps on a train. This guy told him something about being aware in dreams and i replied that it is called lucid dreaming, thinking that he had his first one the night before. My father was looking at me like wanting to tell him more. I told him that there is no such thing as more layers in a lucid dream, that it is just one dream, it is not like meditation and the levels of awareness. Even though i said that to him i didn't get lucid myself.

A vague memory of a dream where I leave my mom's laptop at a friend's place, how will I get it back?

Mess at Lidl
I go to a Lidl. It looks different than usual, the cashiers are on a different level. As I approach it I see it is almost empty, no customers, and police are everywhere. I peek in and say are the registers open, I have things I want to pay for. They say yes and I go and pay. I have groceries that will cost about 10 bucks, I don't have any more money. She is checking out a lot of stuff and the total is going over 40. Did I take too much? I'm going to have to remove a lot of items. I realize that the cashier has rung up stuff from other people behind me into my tab. They are miserable, middle-aged men there who bought lots of fancy food items and are aggravated at the inconvenience. I try to be very happy and relaxed so the checkout woman doesn't feel too stressed.

The Cat's Voluntary Fast to Kill the Worms
I'm in an apartment I don't recognize, my mom lives there? I see a cat in front of me, there is a bathroom to my left. I'm told the cat is on a voluntary fast it won't eat, to kill some worms it has in its intestines. It's like I can see into the cat with x-ray vision. I see two massive worms in white in its intestines. I'm told they are so large that if they got out they could fight a mouse and win. I smell that the cat has some poop stuck on its butt fur. I should remove it but I'm afraid of getting the poop on my fingers and getting worms too.

Outside getting Taunted
It's night time I'm by my mom's place on a forested walking path by a bench. I'm walking to a female friends place. I see a group of hooded guys, I pull my hood up so they wouldn't bother me. I try to walk by but they taunt me, one kicks me in the ass. I yell out and tell him to watch it and the whole group laughs at me. I turn, getting real angry and I wake up. In the blurriness of waking up I see one of the guys, his back turned to me, as if he's looking at the book shelf. I focus and see nothing.

Gun Religion
I'm inside a central bus station, a little kid asks for cigarettes, he says I look like the type of guy that would have counterfeit Malrboros. (?!?) I have a leather jacket on. I tell him not to even start, it's going to be a thing he'll regret for life. I walk into the bus.

It's morning, sun is rising like the summer, I'm out to the east of the city. I'm walking on the sidewalk by the highway. It's so early there is no one around. I walk and I'm approached by two people, they have darker skin, they look Indian, and have good clothes on, like Mormons. They approach me and I decide to be polite and listen. They tell me to go and watch a movie at their place that will change my life. I'm about to tell them I know enough about Jesus but being too polite I go with them.

I'm in their place, it's like a basement with windows by the edge of the wall and the ceiling. It is well furnished. I watch a movie that starts with a map of the world when all the continents were still together, and shows how people first emerged in the center of the landmass and as the continents were torn apart people were sent around the world. That can't be right, I think, the two things happened in way different times.

The video shows how different cultures emerged in different places, the first cultures. What is the point of this video? Is this even Christianity?!? I look around and see cardboard cutouts and posters of people with guns in weird outfits, are these pro-gun religious people?

In the kitchen a hippie woman has made homemade ginger ale, it isn't too sweet and has lots of fibrous strands in it. I like it and compliment it to her.

Giant Bugs
I'm in my friends old place, the summer morning sun is coming through the windows. The place is mixed with a summer cabin, I see a wooden wall. There are giant mosquitoes flying around. I have to kill them for him. I have a giant ax and I try to kill them. Right as I swing at one I stop, this is going to cause holes in the walls. I look at the ax and the blade is actualyl flat, it's like a hammer with a really small face. I can use it without wrecking the walls.

I see some taxidermy-ed mosquitoes around, proud trophies.

????
Goofy and Pluto are kicked off the spaceship that has the rest of humanity escaping the end of the world. (who are all characters from Donkey Kong Country). It looks like an old-school sci-fi craft. As Goofy pleads to be taken in, they take Pluto in but then kick the dog out so Goofy doesn't have to die alone. They give him four cigarettes as sympathy. The spaceship launches away, Goofy and Pluto with four cigarettes sitting on the sofa of my childhood home.

Vague image of huts in the Pacific during World War II where each hut has a secret marijuana bush that then causes the hut to burst in flames?!?!?

1.9.16 - day off
Yesterday worked till 11 pm and went to bed at 2am. Slept till 8 or so, WBTB till 10:30. Slept till 2pm, but had a lucid in first part of sleep with WILD. Only about 5-6 min long.

I was in some tiny apparatus, which then turned into a flying car like in Jetsons and I drove it through a obstacle course to see how fast and accurate I can go. I went pretty fast.

In a much longer non-lucid after this one, there was a huge party in a family I used to work for. So much food. But I later realized it's all tofu. Even the icecream I ate. Ewww!

Today I went for my daily meditation session later...at 19.00...usual routine, make sure I'm warm enough, dim the light right down, play quiet backgound music. I realise that I am drifting into hypnagogic sleep because I suddenly realised that I was slumping forward from my normal upright stance (I estimate that at least 20 minutes had passed because the music is on its 2nd loop.)

As I slowly straightened with my eyes still closed (I'm well-conditioned to remain with my eyes shut and I always do things like correcting posture or dealing with itches as if it's a slow ritual...so as not to break the atmosphere) Instinctively now, I thought “create a square.”

What I got was a much larger square than normal and inside it was a clear, quite-detailed black and white outline of a house (was it more sepia? Maybe). Then reaction set in...part of me is conditioned to “bring the mind home” for meditation...part of me felt the excitement I got when I first started getting lucid events because this might be another step towards successful visualisation ...and the image faded.

What I now know about brain neurons (my minions as I now choose to call them) is that they begin to work in unison on a set task and the more they band together the better the result. Dare I hope that they have taken the “create a square” task a stage further? Right my little minions...if so start recruiting more because I'm going to try and use meditation to get to a focussed state of hynagogia and train myself to (a) keep calm when I get an image and (b)...the difficult bit...try and move further into a sleep state while remaining partially aware (a WILD of course)

I used to regularly defy convention and attempt to WILD during the day by merely relaxing. I used to get strong SP and really strong “rushes” (as if I was going somewhere) But a dream never formed and I eventually abandoned my attempts because I began to wonder if the strength of the sensations might in fact be damaging something (perhaps my minions were getting a bit punchy.)

Maybe my current ability to meditate is what was lacking before and I'm reaching a more relaxed state. (certainly I cannot create images when fully awake) Interestingly though, I'm not getting SP or the “rushes” this time around...maybe they'll return when I train myself to hang loose and let things move forward.

As I always say...only time...and continued experimentation will tell.

I'm in a city, it's as usual made of long houses interlocked with eachothers and very steep. I need to protect a small group of children from a man. I try to have them to run and get away, but they are too scared of stubborn to listen to me and I have to fight the man head on. I shapeshift into something quatripedal, with fangs and claws, attacking this man to keep him from snatching the kids. They run from me and I chase them into a house big enough to be a manor and scramble up some wooden stairs, shifting back and huddling in a corner between two dark rooms. I can see that one of them is a bedroom, with the single bed close enought to the half open door that I can see under it. I'm trembling all over, feeling both vindicated and hurt by the children's fear. My sister and a yound man find me here, and crouch to be on eye level with me, talking soothing nonsense.
The man take a halfstep to the left and a very strange insect crawls from behind him. It's a light, soft green color, and looks like a centiped the size of a small dog. On its head is a mass of feelers looking like ribbons or feathers, gently moving like algae in water. I'm both repulsed and fascinated by it, and I huddle a little closer to the wall when it advances. It stops before I get too inconfortable, and something grows out of it's back; it's butterfly wings, the same soft green color with a big eye-like spot and a long tail. It looks like a luna butterfly, and it's pretty, in a weird way.

Bed @ 2230
Woke @ 0220

After the cataclysm
I'm looking at a globe. Now, I'm looking at a globe online, after some kind of cataclysm has hit, looking at an area high up in the northern hemisphere. There's a large unlabeled landmass, and around it are fairly small islands, each marked with a country name. I see the US, the UK, France, and many others. I'm glad all the countries survived, though I'm saddened to see how small everything is now.

Now I'm outside, at night, in an impromptu campground filled with people who survived the cataclysm and no longer have a home. We're pretty comfortable here, as we made good preparations before the event, but there are many people with nothing at all. I look past a fence to the ocean and remember that we won't be staying here for much longer, as this area will soon be underwater.

Now I'm walking along a road looking at GPS on a small display on my phone's portable charger. I hadn't realized it, but it seems the charger can act as a second display to the phone. I'm using it now since this display draws less power than the phone's built-in display, and who knows when I'll be able to plug either device again. I get some kind of weird popup asking whether the charger or the phone should be considered the GPS source; I'm confused for a moment, then realize what it means and pick the correct answer.

Now I know that, if I follow this road for a while, I'll hit a certain intersection. I'll need to turn right along <some road> and keep going, and eventually I'll reach where we need to be.

Now it's day. I'm standing outside my car, in a deserted shopping center parking lot. I'm annoyed both at the car and at myself since it broke down half way to where I was going. Now I'm doing something - some kind of maintenance - that's gotten my hands really nasty and greasy. I see my wife drive by and I want to call her, to tell her she passed me, but I don't want to get my phone dirty. I'm working with another guy, and his hands are clean, so I move my arm to shift my jacket so he can see the phone and ask him to grab it, hit home, and tap the icon showing my wife's picture.

Now I'm at a run-down home. There's a screen door that's not working right - something's wrong with the pneumatic cylinder. Now there's a guy with me oiling it using some crazy contraption he built himself that has four cans of oil arranged in a circle tat he can pull the piston through to oil every surface at once. I'm impressed, and he tells me something of the device's origin.


Woke @ 0700 (alarm)

Talking about marriage
I'm on a conference call with Kaleb and Chad (I'm either driving or at a coffee shop, not sure which). Kaleb asks Chad if the "Not a constructor" error has been fixed. Chad says it isn't, and Kaleb asks what it even is, so Kaleb starts a screen share so Chad can guide him to see what's going on. When the share first comes up, Jira is on the screen, and Sara says "Now THAT'S a kanban board!"

Now we're talking about the woman Kaleb wants to marry which is strange, considering he's been married for years. I ask him if he's given her the ring yet, and he hems and haws, explaining he really wanted to do twelve/twelve, ten/ten, eight/eight, etc (something to do with liking even months?), though he likes ten best. I thought he'd been aiming for an April wedding, so I'm pleased that I may yet beat him which is also strange, since I've been married longer than he has.


A tight tunnel
I'm seeing a view through a tight tunnel. It's constructed on both sides and above and has packed dirt below. A pipe is running along the ceiling. I'm very thankful I don't have to crawl through there - it looks really claustrophobic, and there's no way to turn around. Now my view has shifted to a 90 degree corner that looks difficult (but not impossible) to get around. Now my view has shifted to the next corner. This time, there are two pipes - one coming from each direction - and they make the clearance low enough that it won't be possible to get through. I consider that, since the bottom is dirt, it may be possible to dig down a little to have enough clearance, but it'll be tiring and tough, and there may not be enough area to spread out the dirt.

Now I'm beyond the tunnel's exit, hiding behind a beat-up car in some kind of war zone. The combatants haven't yet seen me, and I'm examining the area to decide what to do next.

D1: I was at a train station in the middle of the woods with some people. A murder happened and me and the people I was with were responsible. We somehow compacted the body into a small size and threw it in a small trashcan in the bathroom. We were scared that our DNA was all over the trash can and the body, but lots of other people using the bathroom also used the trash can so their DNA was added to it. The whole dream was spent trying to cover up this murder/not get caught. The dream started to repeat itself. At one point in this dream, we somehow compacted the body into small cubes and I shoved them in my mouth to hide it. I woke up gagging.

D2: I was at my boss's house and he was showing me his dogs, as I was going to pet-sit for him while he was away. He showed me into the basement where he would play with them. There were 3 medium-sized dogs. His neighbor's house was connected so when he saw us he came to say hi. His neighbor was an older man, maybe 60 ish with graying hair. We were in the basement and I was standing next to this neighbor and my hand accidentally grazed his thigh. "Did you do that on purpose," he asked, flirty. "No!" I replied. "Yes you diiiiid" he said, creepily. Then he started touching me inappropriately. A girl next to me saw and started telling him to stop. We went up stairs and I started freaking out because I knew I would have to come to this house several more times to look after the dogs. I started to have a panic attack.

D1 - There was a creature that did not need human comforts, it moved out of the house where it had been as a human. It now lived in a hollowed out tree, surviving on things left on the tree floor. It was very cold and dark but it did not care. It just existed. Children came to the tree and it did not mind or pay them attention.
It went to work and carried out its duties with minimal interaction with others their and was able to dupe them into thinking it was a human.
The creature reminded me of the groak from the moomins.


D2 - At college sitting outside with a group of others, a girl is tuning up her guitar. A string is broken. It is a steel length with barbs on it. I offer to fix it and use my powers to melt and then stretch it back to normal.

D3 - Taking my daughter (when little) to a cinema to see a film. The cinema is on two floors and is very stark, qrey concrete walls. I buy tickets only to find the picture is not on, as the projector is not working. People are occupying themselves by eating in an upstairs resteraunt or drawing on the large screen with is not in use.
Eventually the film is back on but it is not the right film, no one cares as it is a children's film and pretty much the same. But I know my daughter will care and try to get a refund. I cannot however find my receipt or remember if I did infact purchase a ticket.

D4 - Some of the college students from the earlier dream are having a car race, the car is multicoloured with slogans all over it, mostly green thougth. We are in last place with the other cars infront bunched up. I use my powers to fix the car in time to speed ahead and win at the last moment.
In the student bar after their is a guy who was on the other team. I am concerned he will pick a fight with our team leader, so I invite him to sit with me at a table, away from the others. I then will be able to use my powers on him if he tries anything.
I ask fi who is there if she will hold my hand, I use my powers and when we hold hands it does a glowy red thing.

[comments]
I feel I have been living a life with no joy. Fairly bleak like the groak.

10/1/2016 (sat)

Before 6am
FLD "The Nicest Sink in the World"
A guy was having trouble with his ipod and asked me something. Later on I found his phone and realised he googled how to get to the next track. Didn't want to look stupid, I guess. Well, it's time to go back home, so I wait for several cars to pass before opening the car door and getting out.

I felt impatient, wanted to get home. Running is difficult, and I acknowledge that running is only difficult for me in dreams, so this is a dream. No flash of lucidity or rise in awareness takes place though. I struggle to run and end up at home. A group of people discuss a special promotion that allows you to get a new 'device id' and unlock your phone. Ignoring them I try to get into the next room by attempting to phase through the wall. Halfway through I get nervous about losing the dream and step sideways into the door.

The next room has a huge television set. As soon as I sit down the room fills up with people. MS walks over to me and start talking about work stuff - "the changing address problem". Also there is a problem with the motorbikes? I find gum in my mouth and put it into a tissue.

The situation goes a bit screwy here: We are now preparing for a fight. Several other DCs are holding baseball bats and discussing tactics. I get given a heavy looking stick. They also hand out sugar coated nuts. They are all different shapes, like different nuts are underneath - cashews, brazils, I try a few and they taste good. One DC washes their baseball bat in a sink, exclaiming: "This is the nicest sink in the world."
Erm... okay.

6-8.30am
Short LD 332 "Animated Magazine"
I'm in the living room of my house browsing the web on my laptop while in the background the TV is on. A music channel. The music is terrible, not my sort of thing, but the videos are full of ladies in underwear and heels dancing around.

In walks my sister, declaring it is time to watch Sesame Street. She does something with the remote and the music video jumps to the laptop screen. The room has changed. It is now the office. Realising this isn't really the place to watch erhem 'music videos', I turn it off.

The guy at the desk next to mine takes a bowl of fruit off my desk and mixes it in to some Angel Delight. It looks tasty, but he doesn't offer any to me. There is a candle on the desk which is exactly the same colour as his pudding, although with a white wick sticking out of it.

Feeling hungry I decide to go get some food. Ctrl-Alt-Delete doesn't lock my screen, just changes the desktop picture. Oh well, it doesn't matter, this is a dream.

At the exit to the office I find a shelf full of books. They seem to be graphic novels and comics. One set is called Shadowman and looks interesting. A crowd of people have also gathered to look at the books, so I attempt to put them back on the shelf. They no longer fit, so I dump them on sideways and make my departure.

Outside I head towards my motorbike, planning to ride home. My keys have a tiny dog attached to them. It wakes up, a tiny mass of white fur, and starts yipping at me. This seems kind of impractical, to put a dog on a key chain. Surely it gets squished against the keys when in a pocket? Still, the keys seem to be required to open a nearby door, but the scene fades.

False awakening. Lying in bed I find a pair of my jeans dumped on top of the covers. I consider getting up but then decide to sleep some more. Then it occurs to me this is still a dream. Next to the bed is a magazine. I find it is clear and easy to read, despite the darkness of the room. I become lucid and start flipping through the pages, wondering if I can make it a bit more exciting.

The pages mention European Stock. Boring. Needs more... lingerie models... flipping the page I find an animated scene of a woman in a long dress sitting on a swing. It looks like a Harry Potter newspaper, the text all static but the images moving. The swing is suspended from a tree with living vines and covered in ivy shaped leaves. A man in a suit walks up and kisses the lady on the swing. I try to step into the scene and instead everything goes black.

The scene reforms in a theatre. A rehearsal for a play is going on. An actor that looks like Ronnie Barker walks out on stage along with a short old woman. The woman says Ronnie's line. "Yes, I know." He replies irritably.

Suddenly a flying robot hovers over to them. They both looked shocked. Behind them a small robot stomps out. It looks like the barrel of a mini-gun. I'm a DO and attempt to influence or gain a body, but instead lose the scene again.

This time I'm with my sister walking through a covered market in a foreign country. A Chinese woman comes and opens a locked door for us. "Share share" I say. (Phonetically, that's "thank you", I think...) The woman nods and smiles, opening the door. It leads into a small tea shop. My sister is interested in several small white pots, possibly tea pots but not in a usual shape. I briefly become lucid, remembering that it is impossible for me to be in China, but then wake up.