Recent DJ Posts

The semi-lucidity has been strong with me, even through my dry spell.

I recall in my first dream I was flying around above my subdivision. I had a smartphone and I was recording myself flying because I wanted to have it for when I woke up; I was planning on using it as lucid dream motivation.

I remember a couple of dream characters that vaguely resembled some old bullies that used to hang around my subdivision appearing in the dream.

I continued to fly around. I seemed to be moving pretty low and pretty slow, and it was taking some effort to keep myself airborne. I then got a long stick with a miniature Breadcake (ahem... art thread... ahem) on the end of the stick and began recording him as if he were flying through the air. There was some context having to do with filming it for a lucid dreaming related youtube channel.

I awoke at some point and tried to properly WBTB into a real LD, but I just wound up with another dream that was more or less nonlucid.

I was out on a lake in the mountains, with Marcus and Manei in a small metal motorboat. Well... I wasn't with them, I was watching them from the third person. Marcus took out this big duffel bag from the bottom of the boat. In it was... well... me. It was a robot body with a synthetic skin made to look just like me.

He moved it up and got it into a sitting position, and inserted a small power cell into the back of the head, then initiated the boot sequence. I began feeling like I was being pulled toward the robot. The robot stood up in the boat and then dived into the water. After it landed in the water I merged with it.

Marcus told me to just enjoy myself and that even though I had a robot for a body I should not be concerned about the water because the synthetic skin made for good waterproofing.

I saw a wooden structure on the water and thought it was a dock. I swam over to it to investigate. It turned out to actually be a train track. I climbed up on it and through the use of some magnetic technology I was able to slide along it at a decent pace.

The track was built a little bit like a roller coaster that traversed the mountains. It was an eerie landscape of beautiful vegetation, though it was very foggy and visibility began to become more obscure.

At some point I passed through a city. Though the whole city had been overgrown by vegetation. Some of the buildings had collapsed or were leaning up against one another. I came to the end of the track here where, taking me up a long hill like the first hill on a roller coaster and then just ending.

At the very top I found a note written on a very old looking sheet of paper.

"Well, I really Photoshopped myself into a dead end here...". There was a picture of a pixelated skull and crossbones below the writing.

I lost track of what happened after this. I think a raptor attacked me and bit off the synthetic skin on my right arm revealing the robotic endoskeleton.

Nothing!

So I was in the upstairs of my house when all of the sudden I looked over the balcony, and I saw the Easter Bunny. he had brought a pink cat with wings, and a couple of deer. I should have known it was a dream when I saw him in the first place! I am so mad for not realizing, but it was a cool dream that lasted only a few seconds anyway. I was in First person point of view for the first time in this dream!

I was in an apartment with a few friends. I was in the bedroom with a particular friend who I've only recently grown attracted to. We were laying next to eachother but not in any sexual sort of way, and I got up and went into the kitchen. I then saw the others laying in the living room and watching the television and hanging out. I saw my crush leave the room and I suddenly figured I'd ask her about her first kiss to segway into my kissing her, but decided the best place to do this wasn't in front of everyone where she'd feel pressured, so I retired back to the bedroom.

She followed me but when she entered she was no longer herself. Instead of it being Alyssa it was now an old friend of mine Taylor. I felt awkward asking a question with that purpose but for some reason it was already decided that I'd ask. So I did and she mentioned something about her boyfriend and then we segwayed into going on a trip.

We were in a BMW that was stick shift however the seat was rotated funky and I couldn't press on the clutch very easily and shifting was a challenge. I adjusted the seat as we approached a red light after driving several blocks with this uncomfortable seating arrangement. I was feeling very tired or something and was looking out the passenger window instead of watching where I was going and the lady in the lane to the left of me had decided to start switching lanes to pull into my lane but ran out of room to pull forward so she was half in my lane and half in hers. I have extensive wreck avoidance practice from racing and so out of the corner of my eye I saw her as I approached and I had pulled a bit far up on her side, it looked as if I was trying to block her from getting into my lane.

The driver was a middle aged mother of 2 and both of her daughters were sitting in the passenger seat looking out the window. I could hear them talking and somehow our cars were attached and it was like we were only separated by a thin sheet of glass but I could hear them just as if they were right next to me. I told Taylor that I could hear them and then I wondered if they could hear me. When I looked back at the mother and daughters all three of them were looking directly at me, but not in a creepy way, just more like the mother was looking at me because she was pissed off and the daughters were looking because the mother was.

The light turned green.

I let her pull ahead of me and I began to drive. With the seat fixed I felt much better with driving the manual transmission and downshifted to second gear after we were going down the road. I nailed the gas and we began to take off but it wasn't as quick as I anticipated. In fact the car was rather slow. I shifted to third gear. Not much speed.

The road then dead ended into a parking garage and we were waiting in a line of people to get a ticket to park. I noticed that the lady from the red light was in front of me.

We lost interest in waiting and got out of the car and walked through a doorway. We were on this rooftop of sorts. It was like a restaurant that had been setup on a rooftop. It wasn't the place we had been looking for and I looked around. There were quite a few people around. Suddenly across the rooftop an older man raised his hand and waived at us. It was Taylor's PaPa. He was a kindly looking older man with white hair. Before we walked all the way over to him I thought "this is all a really weird scenario" and decided to do a reality check. I looked at my hand to count my fingers, a full proof method of reality checking for me, and noticed I had 5 fingers. I looked up and then looked back down at my hand. I had to concentrate because it was difficult to count for some reason but i managed to tell that there was an irregularity with my hand. I managed to count 6 fingers. I said "okay 6 fingers so I'm dreaming".

I felt the rush of lucidity waft over me like a wave on the sands of the beach. I felt warm and everything became very clear and colorful. The sun was out and there were clouds in the sky and people eating at tables. The first thing I wanted to do was stabilize the dream. I started clapping my hands together and then remembered reading something about touching objects in the dream world. I walked up to somebodies table and slapped my hands down on it. They didn't go through. I was surprised at how real it felt. I rubbed my hands together a little more and then I walked up a small flight of stairs to go to the next balcony restaurant patio thing and picked up somebodies drink from their table. I poured it on the ground right in front of them and laughed. They looked at me and I said "suck it" and then he went back to eating. I looked around and started wondering what I should do. I quickly looked for the hottest girl around to get some action with but then thought that this would be a waste of a lucid dream. Regardless I found a girl and slipped my hands into her shirt. I closed my eyes for a moment to imagine a girl and have her appear but when I closed my eyes I lost lucidity and the dreamscape closed.

Fuck. Wasted a perfect lucid dream.

In which C almost drowns in a flood...

I'm in a food court with H's daughter, C. We are sitting at a high table with bar stools near a concrete pillar. The floors and walls are concrete also. There are huge rectangular windows lining the walls similar to the old roller rink, only they are enclosed with glass. We are waiting for food. I'm holding my swimsuit for some reason, and I nail it to the concrete pillar near our table.

Our number is called. I walk to a counter to retrieve our food when suddenly we are hit with the force of a giant wave. The entire food court is immediately submerged under water. I hang on to the counter and hold my breath while the wave passes. Then I'm able to get my head above the water and look around. The water is still now, but nearly touches the ceiling. I swim over to the windows and open them. The water rushes out.

I look for C and find her on the ground near our table. She is a reddish blue color, still and slightly bloated, her wet hair spread out on the ground around her head. It's H at the viewing, of course. This doesn't make sense to me, so I shake her by the shoulders, and it's C again. She sits up and vomits water.

Suddenly she's herself again but she retains the reddish blue skin color. She's laughing, nonchalant about what just happened. I tell her that we need to get out and see if everyone is OK. The force of the water was unbelievable, and I'm worried others might need help. She's laughing and unconcerned. She's talking about how she thinks her new skin color is punk rock. She says she's just like Mystique from X-Men. She wants to take selfies and put them on FB. I'm annoyed with her, but I can't leave her there alone.

I need to remove my swimsuit from the pillar. The area around the food court is covered in water still, and to swim around helping people, for some reason I must have my swimsuit. I'm trying to pry the nail out with my hands, but it won't budge. I go back to the food court counter and ask the employees for a hammer, but they say it was pulled away with the receding wave.


In which I have an argument with my mom, visit a waterpark and cannot kill a boy...

I'm riding with my mom in the car. She asks me if I ever hear a chiming sound from inside my head. I know exactly what she's talking about. (In the dream), I had just posted on an online medical discussion board about hearing this sound. It's a common symptom of a disease that I'm worried I have. I don't want to discuss it with my mom.

No, I tell her. I have no idea what you are talking about. I hope this will end the conversation.

Instead, she glares at me. Oh really? You've never heard that sound? I guess you never have a trembling sensation in your neck right before the sound either?

She's being passive aggressive, and I hate that. I just repeated my answer. I have no idea what you are talking about. I want her to shut up about it. It's none of her business what I search for online.

I happen to know that you are lying to me. I happen to know that you go online discussing these symptoms with people.

At least now she's being openly confrontational. I start to see red. How do you know what I discuss online?

You logged into that discussion board on my phone and I saw it there.

I know this is a lie. I would never use her phone to do anything I wanted to remain private. I told her she was lying.

I know exactly how you really found out. You looked at my phone while I was using the restroom.

She admitted it. She's angry. She wants an explanation for what I'm discussing online.

I tell her she has no right to snoop. I tell her that it's abnormal and unhealthy for her to snoop around like that. I tell her that if she's angry, it's her own fault. It was none of her business in the first place.

She argues that, as my mother, she has every right to snoop on me. I respond that this might have been true when I was a child, but it is certainly not true now that I'm an adult. As an adult, I can discuss whatever I want online, and she has no right to snoop around in my life and that I do not have to explain anything to her.

Then, I lose it. The emotions that came up were intense. I tell her that even when I was child, the way she snooped around and never directly confronted me about anything and the way she showed my personal items to other people and all of that made me hate her. I told her that it was damaging and shameful and that it made me rage.

She responds by throwing some of my adolescent behavior up in my face. Some of it is really embarrassing, and I'm not sure why I did the things she mentions. It makes me feel ashamed, and for a moment I'm terrified and guilty and exposed. But then I remember that I'm not a child anymore and that none of this stuff matters anymore and that I can just leave.

So I do. I walk off. I walk into a waterpark. There are no other people there. At the center of the waterpark is a 30 floor high tower from which five or six waterslides descend. I run up the stairs as fast as I can. I'm so angry that I want to smash things and destroy something. I'm stomping and shouting the whole way up, and it feels good to feel my heart pounding and my blood pumping. I'm crying with rage. I get to the top and immediately jump down the slide. It is a very good waterslide- very fast with lots of turns and thrills, but I hardly even notice where I am or what I'm doing because I'm so angry. I pass under the camera that takes pictures of riders, and I scowl. I think how stupid it is going to look later.

I land in the pool of water at the base of the slide and immediately run up the stairs and do the ride again. Since there is no one else at the park, I do not have to wait.

Then, I run up the stairs a third time. The stairs are very steep, and there are 30 flights of them. I take them two or three at a time. I can feel my body working efficiently now. I'm in a zone. I think of how good it feels to be alive, to be in shape, to get your body to the point that you can nearly effortlessly achieve an athletic feat. I wonder why I let depression knock me down when it feels so good to be so strong. I shouldn't be lazy. I'm a badass when I want to be.

I get to the top of the slide a third time, but the ride is closed. I'm calm now. I stand there and look out over the park. I count how long it takes my heart to return to its resting rate, and I'm satisfied with how efficient it is. I turn around to go back down, but I somehow take the wrong stairwell. I'm now standing at the back of a huge auditorium. There is a ramp descending from the doorway with rows of auditorium seats on either side. In the central main seating area, there are a dozen or so middle school aged kids. An adult sits on the stage in front of them. He is sitting casually on his bottom with his legs dangling over the stage. He has a water bottle nearby and some papers in his hands. A few lights are shining on him. He is obviously some sort of theater teacher.

The teacher looks up at me and smiles. He waves me towards him. The kids all turn around and watch me walk down to the stage. The teacher stands up and shakes my hand. He's about my age. He's very calm. He explains that the stairs I was looking for disappear when the water park closes, and I'll have to spend some time in the theater now. He smiles at me again, and I realize it is a trap. All the kids smile at me as if they are expecting some sort of show.

I turn and run backstage. I climb the ladder up to the catwalks and sit up there trying to figure out what to do. I start to rage again. I'm frustrated at how quickly a day can go bad. I don't know how I'm going to get out of the theater.

The teacher calmly climbs up towards me. He doesn't completely ascend; he stands on the ladder but leans his elbows on the catwalks and casually addresses me. I'm screaming in a rage about all sorts of things.

He asks me what the anger feels like. I tell him it feels like I want to destroy things. I want to smash the theater with a sledgehammer. I feel like I could tear open someone's stomach with my hands and pull out their entrails or grab them by the back of their hair and repeatedly pound their skull into the pavement. I tell him in detail how angry I am and how much I want to rage and tell him to leave me alone. But he is very calm and just tells me to come down. He says he'll give me a sledgehammer or a victim or whatever else I want. I look at him and think he is disturbed.

I come down to the stage. The kids are all watching attentively now. The teacher and I are in the middle of the stage and the spotlight is on us. The teacher calls one of the middle schoolers, a 13 year old boy, onto stage with us. The boy lies down on the wooden stage floor at my feet. The teacher tells me to go ahead and rage on him.

I just stand there and stare at him. Come again?

Beat the kid up. Kick him.

OK. I pull my foot back to kick him, but I can't bring myself to hit him with any real force. I can feel his ribs against my feet. I think how easily they would break. I can't do it.

I sit down on top of the boy and wrap my hands around his neck to strangle him. He starts to gasp and turn colors, but he does not struggle or act disturbed. He just lies there and looks at me. I can feel the blood pulsing through his neck and he starts to turn purple. I think of how long it would take to cause brain damage.

I let him go and look at his neck. There are finger marks where I was holding him. I realize that I was not squeezing in a way that would efficiently block his trachea, so I reposition my hands so that one thumb is pressing firmly into his tracheal airway and the other is pushing in his tracheal cartilage. I have a good grip on him now. The teacher is now squatting down next to us, watching. He seems to approve of my repositioning. The boys' cartilage feels bumpy and fragile under my thumb. I can't make myself apply any pressure at all.

I tell the teacher that I can't intentionally damage someone like that. The teacher asks me how I feel. I tell him that I feel pretty calm.

He takes me out the exit of the theater from backstage. I have to take another waterslide back down, but because the park is closed, the water is not running. I try to slide down the slide, but I keep getting stuck in the turns. Finally I stand up and try to walk down, but the slides are shallow and turn at sharp angles. I have to sort of crawl and crouch my way down on my knees with my hands holding the edge of the slide.

I was in an area near the sea. There's some kind of obstacle course. I was with others from parkour training. We were going to go through the obstacle course. I was afraid but I was able to pull it off. I jumped over obstacles and climbed, and I even rode that line thing from one area to the next.

I think I skipped my turn because I was afraid at first but then built up the courage. I jumped in line.

---

Notes:

- I was on/off sleep coz I was very tired.
- I was supposed to do tricking training but skipped coz I was too tired.

This was a very intense dream.
I only wish I could remember enough of it .
This was like a time-loop dream where, when I don't like the outcome, the dream sort of rewinds so I can change it. Non-lucid.
I also DC hopped throughout the dream, taking in the perspective of almost everyone.

My main DC was investigating the disappearance of many people. She dyed her hair blue to follow a clue. She went to a warehouse and a woman greeted her and told her she shouldn't be wearing the lipstick shade she had on. But she was welcomed because she passed the test in finding them. These were all people who felt out of time and instead of just going with the flow of time, they interrupted the outcome by leaving it for solitude.
Then I DC hopped into a family fighting, then back to my main where it was revealed she had lived 3 centuries but along different time-lines.

A boy was brought out- her baby brother, I think. He looked translucent like a ghost. Another flesh-and-blood boy was placed beside him. They had life meters in front of them. A man appeared to show her the extent of her actions in messing with time. The more her brothers meter filled, the more the meter of the other little boy depleted. Everyone was wailing.
Something happened to disrupt the process. Both boys were in a sort of limbo.
My main DC walked past a couple who pleaded with her: "Please don't take our son from us. This was supposed to be his time."

I hopped back into the fighting family- the grandmother, as she was stabbed by someone. I saw life fade through her eyes.

Then the dog woke me up

In this dream I was at some sort of sea world facility with my brother and we were trying to go see the killer whales. We were allowed into a indoor room with a pool that contained one of the orcas. The trainer there was nice enough to let us back there by the pool. I could see the orca swimming around and I really wanted to see it. I lay down next to the water of the pool and the orca jumps out of the water right next to me and I am able to pet it. Its skin is wet and feels a little damaged, probably due to being captive at a park(I do NOT agree with orca captivity). I just hang out with it for a decent amount of time there by the pool. I don't want to leave it but after about 10 minutes it decides to go swim in the water. I try to call it back but it is busy doing it's own thing. We open some underwater gates to see if the other orcas will come into the main pool to see us but no luck.

That has been the highlight of my dreams lately, and I was a bit sad waking up to find out it was just a dream.

havent updated in a while but this dream was important to me so i really wanted to share and archive it.

I was in school. I went into a classroom to take some papers. When I taken them, teacher told me to stay for a while. I sat on the chair close to the tabl with random snacks. Teacher, an older, blonde woman sat in front of me. After a while other students appeared.

We talked and ate snacks. Then when we finished I went to IT room. Everyone was playing something. I went to a PC and started working. I turned on texture, model and level editors from development kit, and whenever I made a change I tested it in game.

The game was in wireframe mode, so I had to use console and type gl_texturemode 1 or gl_wireframe 1 when I needed to switch between them. I wandered dark, abandoned building. I stood in front of dark corridor, waiting for anything that would go out of there.

I drawn a magnum gun, and started to shoot. Suddenly a pack of zombies went out of corridor, and I had to kill them.

So in my dream I was somehow drafted by an NFL team called the Golden Eagles. I was very proud of this, and wanted to show off and was texting some of my friends to search for "Radin NFL" on google. For some reason I was confused about what city the team was in. I wasn't sure if the city was Seattle or San Diego or what. I also felt a lot of doubt about whether I was actually on the team or what... I was confused and apprehension and just told my friends to look me up, lol. I think I already played in a game??

Another scene involved me and a few others reviewing case files of certain people and analyzing whether there was anything sucpicious in the files?? I remember analyzing one file of this guy who was kind of chubby and had glasses. His file seemed clean I guess except for a certain picture in which he was with three girls, me and my team questioned how he got those three girls on his team?? I think it was for some sort of campaign this guy is running for??

I remember another scene of a chicken fry... ( yes, like the kind from burger king lol) talking to some old man. They were arguing about something, but then the chicken fry won out and got to leave the house.

Then there was another scene in which a mother is talking to me and a large group of people.. I think other kids my age and their parents. I think it's cold and snowy outside. After this mother is done talking, I ask my mom if we could put on music to get ready for music festival that's about to start ?? We're all about to start pre-gaming to go to some kind of music festival??

6.12.15

Still night shifts, so sleeping from noon till 9-10 pm. Except today, because I had to go to my second job after first one. Got home at 1 pm, bed at 3 pm - 9:45.

Bunch of dreams

1. A child slides down the stairs that look like stone stairs in my moms apartment. He slides head first and his head hits the floor 2-3 times. I feel bad, even when I didn't do it.

2. I'm on a wooden deck, very high up in the sky. It's attached to some building. The deck is overlooking a bay and I can see in the distance the Liberty Island and Statue of Liberty. I'm taking a picture of a child with the statue, then I ask him to take mine. More people are there, just sitting, wrapped in blankets and coats because it's windy.

3. I point to an apartment overlooking the bay in New York. I show it to this kid. Tell him either me or him has to move there. It belongs to the owner of New York sports team. I'm sad we have to separate, and I know he is too.

4. I'm walking on the edge of grassy playing field. Lots of people to my left, playing all kinds of sports and games. It's the Olympic games. People in white uniforms playing with volleyball, showing off their skills. But the game is not volleyball.

As I'm walking, I realize the games are televised and I wonder what will people think seeing me on TV, why am I there, how do I look and if it's even legal for me to be waling there. But I'm sure it is.

5. Now I'm walking on the edge of the water. There are some puddles on the walk path and I see bunch of marine animals in them. There is a beautiful and huge octopus, and another one, smaller. One of the tentacles is hanging out of the water. Tons of soft coral, anemonies, crabs, I don't want to step on anything, and don't wanna be grabbed by the octopus. I pull out my phone and want to take picture of them. Looking for an angle where sun is not reflecting off the surface, but I can see what's under water. I see that few times when sun shines right through. Have to wait for it few times because it's kinda cloudy and clouds are moving fast.

I was on this small colony on an island. Everything looked and felt kind of like Assassin’s Creed: Black Flag, and I was one of the assassins in my hooded cloak. I was semi-lucid, and remember having a conversation with some guy on the beach. He mentioned something about fire, and I remembered that firebending was something I really wanted to do in a dream. I held out my hand, did a little flick of my wrist, and my hand caught on fire. I could feel the heat from the fire quite noticeably. It didn’t hurt at first, but it got hotter over time, so I had to take breaks every couple seconds. I tried a couple times to make the biggest fireball I could before having to stop because of the heat.


A highly convenient representation of my situation from a YouTube video I watched the other day.

I was now at this event at this large outdoor arena. I was on stage seated with Howie Mandel (comedian and judge on “America’s Got Talent”) and one other guy. Howie got up to do a stand-up routine for a few minutes before introducing me as the next comedy act. I was actually surprisingly calm (despite how nervous I would be in the same situation in real life), but I still didn’t really know what to say. I got up and told a few jokes (which I remember thinking were fairly cheesy, but the audience liked them) before finally waking up.

I went on a date with someone I met at work, I couldn't concentrate on anything he said because every time I looked at his face there was a different insect crawling across it. He wouldn't listen to me when I told him there was something on his face. We look at the menu and order, some time later the waiter comes back and tells me he needs to take our order again. When I look at the menu it makes even less sense than before so I just point at something to get it over with. Later, I leave without so much as a goodbye and after the fact I wonder if I maybe should have said something to him...then I wonder what I was even doing on a date with someone else while I still have a boyfriend.
The restaurant was a part of my workplace, I find myself heading back to the breakroom, feeling slightly panicky and sad. When I round the corner I find my friend's husband DM standing there. I stop to chat with him.
"Are you okay?" he asks.
"Not really."
"Does it have to do with (boyfriend)? Because when I saw you earlier I asked you how he was doing and you didn't seem to know." He replies. I notice that he has one bright blue eye and one brown.
"It's just...we don't really talk anymore."
"How's that? I mean, you live together."
"I know...I just don't see him." I hesitate. "Things have been pretty bad lately."
He asks me why, sounding faintly curious. I glance away, there's a lump in my throat.
"Um...it's like there's this giant chasm between us." I use my hands to gesture, not sure why I'm telling him. We're not even close friends and my co-workers are everywhere eavesdropping. "It's so wide I can hardly see him anymore."
"You'll find a way to cross it." He says. I know he's trying to help, but it just makes me feel like I have to explain that there is no crossing this gap.
"You don't understand." I say, nearly shouting now. "It's not just a chasm, but a cliff. He's at the top and I'm all the way at the bottom and---"
"Then climb up." he suggests with a faintly gung-ho gesture.
"I have been climbing!" My voice issues from my throat in a whispering, grieving shout. "I've been climbing for years and there's no getting to the top, the cliff wall just keeps on going and I'm so very tired of climbing." I stop suddenly, hands in fists at my sides.
"Surely if you tell him this, he'll find a way down to you."
What a useless thing to say. I know him so much better than that.
"But he won't, he'll just stand there at the top, watching me climb, pretending all the while that he's trying to find a way down me. But really there is no way down and I don't have the strength to keep climbing."|


That wasn't at all depressing. Thanks, subconscious.