I kind of stopped caring about getting lucid these past few days. And of course, lucid dreaming works in mysterious ways because just as I stopped caring, a flood of lucid dreams started to come. I can't remember what days these are from, except for the last one that I know for sure was last night. -+- I remember some dream involving being on a school bus that had broken down in my town. Manei and Marcus were there along with other dream characters. I became lucid upon recognizing my two dream characters were present. Marcus was talking to me about some new technology and, but I was distracted and wasn't listening. The little bit of hair on the right side of his head was sticking up funny. I kept trying to tell him but he kept talking for a few minutes. When he finally finished he asked me what I was trying to tell him, I told him his hair. He looked in the mirror above the drivers seat and laughed and flattened it out. Manei then asked some question about the story that I was writing based off of lucid dreaming. (actually doing this) She told me that I shouldn't mis-potray the characters since doing so would be a disrespect to myself. I told her I had no such plans. Why would I use my dream characters for inspiration if I didn't like who they were and was going to change it? There is really no logic in that. Also for some reason in the dream she was wearing a schoolgirl outfit. I can't remember but I think that the dream continued on for some time semi lucid. It was a school anime that DawnEye11 had animated and she was in it too. I don't remember any of the specifics about it but I didn't like the way she portrayed my character. -+- I remember I was at this museum, but some of the security guards had turned out to be evil and decided to trap us inside, and kill all the good security guards. It was some kind of hostage situation and they wanted the government to pay them a large sum of money to get us out. I recall the dream vaguely feeling like when my family visited the planetarium in chicago a few years back. Me and some of the other people had found a way out. Though it was dangerous. We had to escape through this very large concrete room that was filled halfway with water. There were all of these large egg-shaped structures in the room made out of red bricks and held together with cement. Some of them were attached to large steel beams connecting them to the floor or ceiling. Others were hovering on helicopter propellers. It was only appropriate that I became semi lucid upon seeing this very dreamlike and unusual room. People began making their way across the room to the other side. Most people just would swim, but this one guy said that a lot of people had cell phones and stuff that he would offer to carry over for them, and he would try to jump across the brick eggs. Also, the guy had a medical implant that he couldn't get wet, so he figured it only make sense that he do it. I remember the guy looked similar to my dad. Not identical, his voice was deeper and he was a little taller and fatter, but he gave me that same vibe. I remember watching him make his way across. He made it about 1/3 across of the way then he slipped and started to slide down the brick egg toward one of the propellers. I remember hoping that the dream wouldn't start to become a nightmare with this guy falling into the propeller but sure enough, he fell into the propeller and was ripped apart in the most gruesome way right out of SAW or something. lots of blood went into the water and people all started swimming away because they were afraid that the blood would attract sharks. At first I was confused since the water in the room was a closed swimming pool and I could see there were no sharks or even a way for sharks to swim in. But, because dream, about two dozen little sharks appeared in the water and started attacking people. The guys' head landed right next to me on the platform that I was standing on. The left half of his face was completely gone leaving only the skeleton. His head turned and started looking at me. The mouth opened and the head screamed at me. Somehow or other I found myself in the water that was now all pigmented with blood. I was actually standing on the bottom and some of the sharks started to swim toward me when I realized I was not holding my breath and I realized that I was dreaming. I told myself that I was not scared of the situation and the dream would change to something better momentarily momentarily. Instead, the dream decided to be a dick and get worse before it got better. The red water got darker and the floor went away and I was floating in a void of red energy/water. I could still see some of the sharks swimming around me slowly. I then saw Manei but she had been shredded up like the guy who fell into the propeller and half her face was a skeleton. Her body was stitched together in places. She said something to me but I can't recall what it was. I tried to do something or say something, but I couldn't move, speak or influence the dream in any way. I was annoyed by this fact. I remember thinking. "Okay, either I wake up or I dream about something that's not this!" Then metal spikes burst out of her chest, expanding and growing like branches all around me. Then all of the spikes started growing in as they would all hit me at once, but they all stopped right before they went into me and the dream faded away. The dream shifted. I was in a futuristic looking white hallway. I felt like I was still in the planetarium. This girl in a catwoman-like costume that left nothing to the imagination had her hand on my body and was transmitting the dream to me. "Stop! This nightmare! What does it represent?" The dream switched into third person. She put her hand on my chin and made me look her in the eye. "Oh, baby, wouldn't you like to know." She then kicked me back and threw me to the floor. I tried to fight but I was in third person and couldn't control myself. 'I' got back up and she kicked me agian, then scratched me across the face. I then started to feel like I could control myself. I remember the scratches closed with wolverine-style healing and as I spit down to the side. I went back into first person view. She tried to cartwheel toward me and kick me again, but I grabbed her foot and flipped her over my shoulder. She landed on her back and before she could get up and I stabbed her in the stomach with my hidden blade. She scratched me again and started to run away. I decided I would try something new. I shot my blade out on the end of a chain and it stuck into the exposed skin on her leg. I tried to crack the chain like a whip and pulled her up then slammed her into the floor. I then pulled her in and let go of the chain so she was flying toward me. The dream went back to third person but I was still in control. I jumped into the air and fire boosted toward her, then flipped around and kicked her with both legs. After thoroughly kicking her mostly-exposed butt, the skimply-outfitted catwoman lady morphed into a small boy of about ten who was crying. "Why weren't you scared? What are you?" (Paraphrased.) "Because I knew that it was all a dream. Even now, it is all a dream. And the scarier it got, the more I knew what I was experiencing was not real. That, and the fear you created didn't represent anything in my life. Nightmares only have power if they represent something. Everything in dreams is like that. If it doesn't represent something important, it can be easily removed or defeated." "That's no fair! Please don't kill me!" "I'm not going to kill you. I'm going to do something much worse... (<- Joke) I'm going to let you live so that you can learn from this. (Paraphrased from here on out, I remember roughly what I said so.) So, stop going around causing nightmares or your going to get what is coming to you." There was some story behind the boy that he told me. He tried to convince me that he was another dreamer who got bullied a lot during the day, so at night he would use shared dreaming to go into peoples dreams and make them have nightmares to make things fair. He thought that what he was doing did justice and was really angry because if made things fair. I remember posing the question of how this made him any better than the bullies. The dream actually continued on semi-lucid for a very long time after that and the boy became a lucid dreamer and had his own dream guide and everything. Like the last lucid, I don't really recall the details. -+- I am on this steampunk airship where this quadrillionare makes his full-time residence. The airship is actually in the atmosphere of a gas planet, but the planets' atmosphere has oxygen like the earth. The airship had ion thrusters where the propellers should have been, mounted on gold nacelles. The body of the airship was a dark red fabric. There was a large inverted pagoda tower on the underside and the guy lived in the very bottom. I remember we were flown in by this butler guy who flew this odd spacecraft. It was an octagonal frame with windows on every side, except the bottom. It was gold too, and had little maneuvering rockets on all sides. We docked with the big airship and the butler gestured us to go onboard and meet him. The airship was empty and quiet, but occasionally made creaking and buckling sounds.. We made our way down through each floor of the tower. I remember on one floor there were a whole bunch of boxes of legos. I thought it was kind of funny that this guy who was apparently so gentlemanly had so many kids toys. I figured he might have kids or something that come to play with them. We finally got to the bottom level of the tower. It was like this big foyer styled room with stairs on either side and a big glass wall. The dream character was standing there looking out at the storms and swirling clouds. I remember he had a black suit coat and a top hat. He was looking out over the storms of the gas planet. I cleared my throat to get his attention and he turned around and walked over. He had a cane in one hand and walked with kind of a hobble. I could tell one of his legs was a prostetic by the way he walked and the clanking noise it made. I also remember knowing that this character was connected to Marcus somehow. Maybe his father. I greeted him as he got close. Manei said hello as well and told him who we were and that we had been invited to see him. "What is wrong with all your dreamers these days? Cut your hair and grow a pair, boy!" He proceeds to try to poke me in the nose with his cane I backed up. He then went over to Manei. He said something perverted to her, but I can't remember what it was. She gave him this really dirty look. He then proceeded to poke her in the stomach and say that she was too skinny anyway. He said he wasn't interested in talking to us anymore. "Oh, great. He's annoying. He's perverted. and he invites us over just so he can decide he doesn't like us. Why does every dream character other than you or Marcus have to be a dick?" I guess he didn't like me calling him a dick, because he threw his cane at me but I caught it. I told him I was going to break it if he didn't shape up. He said it was made of unbreakable [something]wood from the planet [i forgot]. I took that as a challenge and broke the cane partially over my knee. It was still held together by a little bit of flexible wood but it was more or less useless. The man got mad and said that the cane was worth more than me. He sent a his bodyguard out. He was this huge, 8 foot tall man who looked like alex armstrong from Fullmetal Alchemist but had four eyes in two rows. He had an eye-patch over his top left eye. He told the guard to attack me. He charged at me, and I threw him over my shoulder and he went through the wall. The guard started to get back up and the dream suddenly ended and I woke up. -+- Though the dream that moved me the most, or was the most profound in my opinion was a conversation that I had with Manei. The dream had started out with me being on vacation with my parents at this mountain lodge location. I became lucid when I saw that I had my bracers and my dad told me to stop lucid dreaming because it was bad. My mom and dad got into a fight about whether or not lucid dreaming was bad or not. I acknowledged that this was probably a message about lucid dreaming, but moved on to manifest Manei. We started walking and talking about something in the mountains. I remember saying something to her like this. "Don't be offended by this, but you're everything I never wanted when I started lucid dreaming. I find it kind of funny. So many dreamers want to find their guides so badly, but get nowhere. I was that one in a million who was more than happy happy to go alone. Yet you have been right here all this time." We were now in the soccer field in a park across from my house. There were some kids flying very odd dream kites in the breeze. I remember Manei had a kite too. She seemed to be thinking of what to say. "Often, those who want to be alone are those who need a friend most badly." The dream was hazy and my lucidity wasn't clear. The dream carried on semi-lucid for a few more minutes after that.
Color legend: Non-dream Dream Lucid Lucid #2??: One Last Handshake I walk down a long hallway to find my dad and my grandfather sitting next to one another at a table next to the top of some stairs. My grandfather passed away over 10 years ago, so I simultaneously feel overjoyed and realize that this is a dream. I say, “I want the chance to shake your hand one more time.” He smiles at me. He was in a wheelchair in the years before he died, but now he just stands up and towers over me like he always did. I shake his hand, and hug him. For a moment I have the sensation of hugging him, but soon the visuals vanish into abstract shapes. “I want to ask you just one more question,” I say. “Can I do that?” I don’t have anything in mind but for some reason I want to do this. “Yes.” “What’s your favorite memory of your time in World War II?” A map of the world appears. “Was it your time in Okinawa?” Wait, no, he was never in Okinawa. “Or Pearl Harbor?” He wasn’t at Pearl Harbor. As I name each location big red glowing circles surround different spots on the globe. Other spots light up at random too. I become confused about what I want to ask, now, and the moment slips away. Now I’m back at the top of the stairs, and my dad and my grandfather have both vanished. I head down the stairs, trying to think of goals or Tasks of the Month. Nothing comes to mind, so I just wander through a long series of rooms that are decorated in fancy, rather frilly, and outdated ways. I run my fingers along the walls as I go, trying to remember to take my time with the dream and not to rush things. I come to a room that looks like a kitchen and there’s a girl of about 12 standing here. She’s talking to someone, a man that I can’t see. The man says, “[Girl’s name]? Is that you? Prince’s little sister?” [Prince, as in the singer!] Her: “Yeah, it’s me.” Him: “But how are you so young? It was years ago when we fell in love…” Her: “Yeah. Isn’t that creepy?” Him: “No, I remember…” He says something about how she was much older when he knew her. Now I have a false awakening where I’m lying on the ground in an empty parking lot next to a building. I’m still lucid, though, and nearby I see a door into the building labeled “Tony’s Dream Productions!” in fancy script. (This is a reference to Inside Out!) I realize that the man I saw in the previous dream scene is having a nightmare, and I should try to help him out. I mostly think Tony is a DC, but have this strong sense that I should still help. I enter the building and find myself on some kind of soundstage with all of these different facades and bits of fake movie scenery. “Tony!” I shout. “This is a dream! That’s not really her!” I keep walking around the soundstage trying to get his attention. Finally I see Tony at the top of a set of metal stairs. “I’m dreaming? How do you know?” “Because I’m dreaming right now. You are too.” I tell him that I’m sure everything’s fine between him and the girl, and that he was only speaking to a dream character. Soon after I tell him this, the dream ends.
I'm in upstate NY with ThreeCat in a cabin. We have sheep and I want to wander with them as they graze. I think of the cats inside though, and decide we can just go out for a walk for the day. We go outside and around the back where it looks like the lumber yard of Lowes. People in a pickup truck are blasting their bad country music and we wander off. Suddenly we are inside of a Perkins-style restaurant with a buffet line of pies. ThreeCat orders a piece and gobbles it up. I'm aghast that he didn't ask if it's vegan. I ask him how he knows it's vegan and he responds “it is.” I ask the girl on the other side of the buffet line what they substitute the butter with and she says “nothing.” I tell ThreeCat this is a dream and he says “no it isn't.” I think back and wonder aloud how I got from the farm to here and he can't give me a good response. I check text several times (don't know what it says), but it doesn't seem to change. I resolve that this is just a dream and leave dream ThreeCat behind. I find someone and ask if they know where The Fool (from tarot) is? I'm directed to Doug's apartment, except the location is actually Billy's. I go inside and Sh_ is sitting on the couch. They introduce him as Charles and that he is The Fool. I ask him if I may ask him a question. He responds there needs to be an exchange and implies somehow that it must be sexual. I sit in his lap and give him a handjob through his tshirt. I then end up having oral sex with RL in a side 69 position, but she corrects my technique. I definitely lose lucidity and am unable to come back to the dream to ask the question that I want
Yesterday (07-30) + wine tasting, I've brought a bottle, so has my girlfriend, I'm trying to smell the wine she's bought but the bottle is not open yet. + jumping around in a video game, getting beat down, finally get up to the platform and complete, I'm congratulated by guys saying I've won an ability + in a house, pull on a secret control on a shelf activate a secret area, explore, there's a coffin, "hey comes help help me open it", out comes an evil female super being?, fighting her as the double-slashing dagger-wielding guy but she wins, she comes up and hugs you and sucks out your life + William Shatner with his head in a narrow tunnel (in a pirate costume?) beating off an attacker?, he and another guy are putting on movies in a back room then kidnapping/torturing one of the attendees, there's someone lying behind the counter, turns out he's alive Today (07-31) better bedtime 23:23 bedtime (several early pee wakings before dream recall shows up, just vague thoughts that vanish quickly) 06:30 + buying shoes, guy says "you bought the $200 <something> you may as well buy the $600 shoes!", selection of fluffy ankle-high slippers + invited to Dubai to play a solo concert I'm concerned it's a ploy to get me to an Arab country because of my outspoken views on Israel; putting my instrument together, checking the key action, the top piece is broken I'm trying to adjust it / put it back together, a selection of reeds; I'm playing the slow movement of a famous concerto, under-tempo but it's lovely. + playing in a rehearsal, the conductor is all over the place, I say repeatedly, "are you in 2 or 4?! Show the downbeat clearly!", he retorts "listen and you'll hear the downbeats!", see my music (long opening sustained middle Bb) and then many pages of rests (I don't have to play for the rest of the piece), and the music of the 2nd, where there's a pencil marking indicating "1 only" (of the 2nd should play there). 10:39 + I'm walking around and singing (lovely tone!), forget some lyrics, girl reminds me, "oh yeah" I say and sing them; girls singing in a line, one of them drops a contact lens, another picks it up off the ground and hands it to her, she pops it in her mouth -- how did she know the other one didn't make it dirty first? + my cat's trying to climb up / jump to the top of a tall dresser and just can't quite make it, she runs around the walls (I'm impressed by this) to get a head start, and my wife comes and laughs + wife asks about where's the little plastic thing that was on the car's wheel, the car is suspended 6 feet in the air we're looking up at it, the wheel/axel joint has a photo camera built-in, I say either someone took it or it blew off + terrorist attack: I'm hanging on a corner on a major street with a guy talking, later on we return after the attack started, armed guards shouting in arabic, a single nun in black robes is standing off the curb waiting to be picked up, story of the nuns raped in the bus (every single one), "we were just standing right there a little while ago!" I say to the guy referring to the corner + trying to return a girl taken by a "pit of Sarnac"-monster pit with tentacles along the conical sloping walls, two soldier/investigators are getting her back, they're talking to the monster threatening to reduce it to dust and burn it. They will analyze the dust/ashes and find the perfect harmonic frequency of flame to use that will burn it all up instantly. I'm DO floating above and see the two guys standing next to a huge bin full of purple monster dust. with the girl afterwards I'm holding her and crying, I want her to be back, others are explaining that "they" made it so that you can "gather" many into one person, but once you've done that you can't "scatter" them back into many again, where each person retains memory of the original gathered one, I'm sad and rubbing my face all over her including her chest.
My family and I were on a trip somewhere. There was a big set of the curvy roads that go into other highways. It was night time, and we might have been in PA. There were a lot of street lights on, as I can remember their orange hue. We stopped at a rest stop, because I begged for my family to stop because I had to pee really badly. When I got into the restroom, the entire place was just one big unisex bathroom. There were dozens of stalls everywhere. There were also hundreds of people. Whenever I tried to use one, someone else got into it first. Also, I had the fear that someone would watch me pee. Specifically my brother, and a few other people. My brother was laughing at me and teasing me as I tried and failed to find a bathroom. There were many people that I knew there. E.g. there was my grandma's brother, N, and her friend, C, who I saw doing their business there. There were a few people from school, going to the bathroom as well. I remember my neighbor, K, waiting in line for a stall. There were also some hot girls there, pissing and crapping, too. I also remember stalls that were connected with no walls. People were crawling into and out of those ones. I thought that was pretty weird. I forgot if I actually managed to take a piss, but the dream eventually ended and when I woke up, I had the sudden urge to pee.
I was a wizard, escaping from undead armies led by a fearsome necromancer. Many times it nearly catched me, though I fooled it by sending some troops as a distraction. When I thought that I finally found a safe place - abandoned ruins, the necromancer jumped out from behind the corner.
Morning of July 31, 2015. Friday. Notes: The included images are from one of my wife’s many journals, this one being from age fourteen. The two scans are from the same journal page, one showing a distorted Merkaba form, and the other inclusive of the line “I feel you around me even though you have not found me”. Dream notes: Yet again, many years of my life and memory “vanish” and I am probably about nineteen years old. I am apparently in La Crosse at the Post Office (though it is actually a typical muddled composite location). Several other people are around (mostly males around twenty to thirty years of age) even though it is seemingly late at night (and the post office would otherwise be closed to the public by then in reality). I do not seemingly know anyone else though there is a friendly atmosphere. As I am seated across from another male, a Blue Pearl event (Merkaba portal) blocks my left eye’s field of vision (though not entirely) as in real life. However, this does not activate my memory (likely as it is just a rendered dream event and the Merkaba portal only appears in full wakeful consciousness). The other male had been aware of seeing the “blue flame” around me and seems somewhat surprised. “Did you see that?” I ask him and he nods. A little later, I try to “call” it but nothing happens other than a light blue veil-like impression in my left eye that quickly disperses. That is, it is very subtle and does not come “closer” or briefly flash and darken before fading. I end up trying over about twenty minutes in about three locations where other people are around. A couple people think I am jesting and make jokes about other colors such as yellow. One even pushes me near the shoulder (though lightly in a friendly manner). I am somewhat frustrated I cannot call back the Source for whatever reason, though I have no focused intent on why - just the idea of the appearance and not how I would relate to it. (Although there is information about “Metatron’s Cube” I have only ever seen the star tetrahedron that forms the blue portal when the normal and inverted pyramids come together and rotate in opposite directions, although my wife had drawn variations on it in her journal during her childhood and early teen years, along with, of course, the opossum under the airplane and hundreds of other remote-viewed confirmations.) There is one scene where a male is kneeling on the floor and seemingly doing some sort of occult ritual against another person (which I assume is metaphorical of people connected to the Source being manipulated by “normal” people and their false views of life). I immediately mumble some Latin (though I am not sure of the phrase; part of it was something like “dimittam”) and the implied villain falls over and is unable to move and the other person goes on his way. From here, I hear people talking about how the bus is late. I go out and see (on the other side of the street from the post office) two different buses, though there is another one on the post office side. The bus I have to get, second one across the street (facing southward) does not have a driver, as he seems to be involved in a fight - not a violent or physical fight but chasing someone from the area for some reason. The area north of the post office (on the side of the street I am on) is modeled fairly accurately after the bus stop area of the Chermside Shopping Center that was several blocks away when we lived on Stadcor Street, but this does not dawn on me. (Thus, once again, Australian and American settings join in an in-dream composite rendering.) I am feeling inside my right pocket for change and can clearly feel the coins (of which there are about seven of various denominations) and try to determine what they are by feeling the size - and reflect that there is at least about a dollar, though I am somewhat concerned if I have enough money for the bus (though I am not sure what the fee is), though I do not even reflect on what my destination is. My dream fades from around this point (before I get to the bus). It is possible, though not certain, that “trying to determine the denomination of a coin by feeling it” has something to do with a focus on trying to relate (blindly) to other people’s religions without really knowing at all what they mean, as “denomination” can also be defined as “a recognized autonomous branch of the Christian Church”. Although I do not typically document it online as it is almost continuous (and is sometimes so precise, it would almost make my dream extraneous by description - and who wants an extraneous dream journal), yet again a dream utilizes something my wife had been thinking (without her saying anything to me) or a detailed subject of something she and our oldest daughter had talked about (without any way of me knowing about it - unless there is some sort of invisible intercom on my computer desk that relays the information - a bit of dry humor). She and our daughter were talking about the “blue moon” last night (of which I did not know anything about otherwise). At the same time, it is also precognitive of something I see immediately after waking (also typical from day to day). In this case, it was a rather idiotic local article called “‘Blue moon’ doesn’t mean the moon is actually blue” and seemed almost like a humorous “continuation” of a couple in-dream concepts (from others in the post office).
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