Recent DJ Posts

I dream that I have to go pee at work. I enter the restroom and see S. I start to pee in the trash right next to him. I realize what I am doing and just act like it was all a joke. S laughs nervously. I walk up to the urinals but instead of urinals it’s a low wall that opens up into a shooting gallery type space. Its very similar to the Texas Ren Fest we visited for Thanksgiving break this year in waking life. Instead of targets there are guys running around getting “shot at”. I have to pee so bad I don’t care. I figure if that’s what they want to do so what. My urine stream is very much not like normal. It sort of just forms a wide high powered spray instead of stream. I feel like I am peeing a long time with no relief. At some point the guys in there start shooting back. Now I am very mad. Some of it hit my shirt and got my hair. I go to the sink and start trying to wash off. I am so mad I want to beat that guy that peed on me. L from management and some other guy walk in asking what is going on. I say, “that idiot peed on me.” I really should knock him out. Then it clicks. I am dreaming. I can do whatever I want. I can’t get fired for it. I immediately go tackle the guy that peed on me and start beating his face with my fist until there is a lot of blood. I notice how dull and unreal it feels to hit him but I am satisfied. I get up and start to leave but I wake up at that moment and have to pee very badly. I felt thankful that I didn’t wet the bed.

I was in my old neighborhood at night coming up the hill I used to run. It is warm as though it is late spring or early autumn and the last of twilight is just fading away. I become fully lucid and begin to fly. It doesn't seem to be my usual flying but rather a slow sort of swimming through the air that never gets me more than a few meters off the ground.

I tell myself that there will be a means or indication to stabilize the dream. I see a tree with dreamcatchers hanging from the branches. I take one off and loop it around my neck which increases the clarity. I then land, deciding that I want to convert the dream to daytime. I set down, no longer flying.

I then reach up for the sky. I really start to question my method of dream control here, recalling something from the robert waggoner book about thinking of the dream as a mental space rather than a physical space. But I still want to use a physical method of dream control. I begin pawing vaguely at the night sky, rotating the moon and stars along with it. I rotate the entire planet 360 degrees with a few pawing motions until the moon rises and is roughly in the same spot. No sun. I then remember that I should probably rotate the earth east-west. I try rotating to the west one or two swipes and the sun appears, though it is in the northern sky, roughly where polaris would be.

Neil deGrasse Tyson appears and says "Damn it we almost had the three-body problem solved and you hippies had to come and screw it up!"

deleted

delete

About time I caught up with this dream journal. I've been too busy with other stuff. All the following dreams were non-lucid.


Night Before Monday 21st November

I dreamt a racing driver who had been about to retire had returned for another race, but only to run tests which meant that his car was set up to remain stationary on the track. He could rev the engine and run through the gears but there was apparently no drive to the wheels. At least one other driver was doing the same thing.


Night Before Tuesday 22nd November

I had a fairly vivid and exciting, non-lucid dream. The first part I remember was one of my recurring DREAM SIGNS of being in an unfamiliar part of the world or the country, having some kinds of obstructions trying to find my way home. We were riding in a taxi with a foreign driver. My mother was talking to me about something about not wanting to offend the driver and I was telling her to be quiet (as he could hear).

We came to a deeply flooded section of a widish road through countryside, with trees either side. The driver hesitated and asked us which way we came through here before. I think my mother answered that we came by boat / ferry. I think he might have said "Oh." as he realised he was faced with a problem.

The road was so flooded it just looked like a deep river. Without saying anything he confidently drove into the water, maintaining a surprisingly high speed [which in reality would've made a wave of water flow into the air intake of the engine] much to my excitement, probably slight apprehension and, as I could see the driver was succeeding, admiration at his skills. We reached a part where the water seemed to get even deeper and he instinctively moved over to a slightly shallower area to the left hand side.

I remember feeling jubilantly excited after we made it through the water, loudly telling him he is awesome and [this bit is fading] I feel like this blended into an experience of sharing this story with other friends or colleagues who weren't in the car when it happened.


23rd - 26th November

I had an unremarkable dream about carrier bags on the kitchen floor and a couple of unpleasant dreams showing apparently deceased animals.


Night before Sunday 27th November

I dreamt there were lots of animals in the kitchen. The kitchen looked different [DREAM SIGN: Room changed]. They seemed to be loads of large birds initially, like crows possibly. I was conscious that I needed to keep the door shut to prevent them spreading into the rest of the house. As I kept looking at them I saw a strange animal that I couldn't immediately identify as a bird or mammal, that seemed to be on all fours, quite stocky, about the size of a medium to large dog, with a broad, rounded head. It looked purple. I called it a griffin. Shortly after this I saw a bird of prey in the kitchen as well and a smallish chimpanzee that approached the doorway. I was a bit nervous that the chimpanzee might be aggressive but someone reassured me they lived in this home, so presumably domesticated. The doorway now seemed to be open and I was standing in a long narrow hallway running from left to right behind the kitchen door [DREAM SIGN: Unfamiliar room]. The chimpanzee started to look a little more human as it got to the doorway. It may have been wearing glasses or human clothes.


Night before Monday 28th November

I dreamt I was standing in my grandparents' front garden, looking at their quite large house. I noticed short rounded towers sticking out on the front left corner of the house. Possibly later in the dream I noticed there was a separate one on each storey. I think they each had a window of some kind. I did start to question this because I was starting to wonder whether you could enter them from the downstairs dining room and upstairs master bedroom. This is where my subconscious started to change things to explain it. At first I thought there was a bay window on the tower in the bedroom, then I realised I was actually seeing towers on the house opposite my grandparents' house, which looked quite similar. When I turned back and looked at my grandparents' house again, the towers had shrunken a lot in diameter so they barely looked like towers anymore and obviously couldn't be entered from inside the house. Still didn't get lucid or question this further. [Seeing my Grandparents' house and seeing unusual adornments on a building are DREAM SIGNS as are the changes of perspective and the objects when I tried to question things].


Night before Tuesday 29th November

No dream recall. I have the vaguest notion it might have been another dream about travelling away from home but I really don't know.

Better sleep despite an awake period after delving for "earlier" dreams, and fairly good, varied dreaming, decently vivid

I'm scribbling written keywords notes on all wakings with recall now

earlier:
+ working the blinds in my childhood home room, trying to open them, fiddling with them a lot; looking at cactus plants on top of my dresser in same room, flower (artificial?) arrangements, on which beetles (which morph in shape/size as I watch) are crawling

+ best friend MR proposes a game to play: someone poses a problem, and you need to propose some solution [more involved than that, don't recall]; I don't really want to play but say I will

+ hunting on a hill with a rifle on a large open field sloping before me; a large group gathers; moves indoors, thoughts of some large gun arrangement; look out window to group of kids below, "they're waving at me" so I wave but they're waving to someone else instead outside on a girder

+ some question about an old Harry Potter inside a tunnel with a lot of moss/dust bunnies that I'm clearing away from a doorway

+ in grandma's house: close up view of an ornate wooden table, decide to go to bedroom, see "pop up 3d" pictures of family member faces on cardboard stands; in the room see baby picture of me making a frustrated face and I'm struck by how much this looks like a baby picture son #2

later:

+ broken ipad, the screen is all messed up, I'm upset at this, the room is full of tech equipment, I pick up a router from the floor and place it on a table

+ [f] at a rest stop, I need to choose some (long, tree) saws to throw away, they're all bent and unusable, someone is interested in them?

+ [f] parking a car, too close to the crosswalk I think, there are no better places

+ [long, fairly vivid] Fo.Gi. (WFP, college, deceased) is alive: divorced, not dead, skype convo, I leave, he's upset, calls me "prick!", with DD (FG's wife), talk with her new parents in law, I tell her how I was surprised to see FG, I retell the FG story in a room full of people sitting at tables

+ Outside/snow/flush flood, I'm shoveling it and causing rivulets to run, my car is stuck several cars back and go to it but I see it's entirely flooded, guys there point out my frozen horse in the ice flow river, floating on its back with its legs up; I hitch a ride with a trucker and talk about the names of the local university towns, I'm holding a cart-sized wheel in my hands

+ trap house: blow small objects through multiple tubes to "prove" there is no beast lying in wait inside, look down ramp to open area and see evidence of other "blown" objects, move to other side of house and monster emerges, I stay on the high ground to avoid it

Felt like I was awake from 23:30 until about 07:00. No dreams in that time. Then slept until about 10:30, sporadic wakings with some recall:

early:

+ [vague, early] doing things with people in indoor locations, some sort of adventure?

mid:

+ With young g/f (probably too young for me I think) in room, close door, want to get frisky, notice door knob turning, her older sister is in hallway (enters?). I see the door knob turning multiple times. Concerned about someone entering / not having privacy [DS!!!]

+ Take off flying with friends in open outdoor area from high place in front of a huge (massive!) fir tree, spot another group of flying people, we tangle in a brutal flying gang-fight, banging heads against boards, etc. I notice the fir tree branches and needs close up, it's beautiful [waking walk in pine forest 2 hours yesterday]

+ Visiting a pizza parlor where everybody orders toppings from an external vendor, which are then delivered in a group to the restaurant individually packed in plastic bags, people pick up their packs of toppings then hand them to the parlor cooks to complete the order; they have particularly fresh cherry tomatoes and basil, which is why everybody uses them

+

late:
+ standing on lawn looking at street at old CA home, my home is behind me: my car's parked on the street blocking someone else's car. It's closer than bumper to bumper, my car seems partially parked into the back seat/hatch of the car in front. There's no way that car's owner could move. If he does some I hope he won't be upset, I'll just rush down and repark my car in a second, so he shouldn't be. Then the car's owner arrives and he speaks through the car window with (my dad?) in another car about something, I think he's talking about like how I park in my driveway, I see him gesturing towards my driveway so I imagine this is what he's saying, I feel the need to go talk with this guy and settle any issues he has.

+ Many scenes in an office, revolving around my work cube: sweater gift, I get a brown wool sweater, and drape it over the entrance of my cube (and put two shoes underneath it to make it look like someone is there?), get a 2nd sweater gift?

They take away my monitor, but this is OK because I have a laptop, I move to the side a bit and there's a large screen there that I can connect to from my laptop to work, but there's a guy there with a game controller playing games. Large, purplish game scene is on the screen.

There is a guy running through the hallways and bellowing like a berserker, he's a D&D player and his character is a warrior so he just swings weapons around. I think about the other characters that round out a good campaign group: mages, clerics, thieves. I tend to like playing thieves but they have their limits [false I like mages].

Walking past a table, there's a guy there with red berries left on his face from eating pie, there's some talk or presentation we need to get to (?).

They take my back wall of my cube, which means my desk is now connected directly to the desk of the cube next to mine, and while working we're going to have to be looking directly at each other. There is a girl who's been promoted ahead of me, and I think this is a case of severe ageism. She needed the larger work space(?). She's leaving anyway and donates her promotion equipment back to some other employee (her manager?).

I find some guy and ask him about my professor: what are his office hours, where's his office, where are my classes? (He doesn't answer, but tells me that there is a limit of printed or plastic reading materials that each employee is allowed to keep)?

Continuing to seek information on my prof and classes, there is a desk (raided above ground level) where a bunch of female secretaries are working, I ask them, (one comes down to me?)

CrgLe's [WFP, uni B, grad school] discrete math book, I invited (?) CL to my cube, he is reluctant to come, he has his Discrete Math Puzzle book with him, I look at the cover it is colorful with example of many sorts of physical puzzles made up from colored blocks and objects. He explains something about the idea behind the book.

The promotion girl is meeting with (HR?, Banker?) in order to get her salary, she sits down at a desk across from the rep, and asks for some deposit slips. I'm standing a bit back from the desk watching. The rep immediately takes out a pad of desposit slips and starts writing down the girl's salary on it, I sneak closer for a look, I want to see what she earns, I wonder if that's a weekly amount?

I am focusing on the feeling of freedom in my dreams. Specifically, freedom of movement. I have designed MP3 track meditations, with my own recorded affirmations, to listen to as I go to sleep. Last night I dreamed I was being attacked by a huge, powerful enemy. I struck him with a double hand attack to his head and he fell. I then became lucid enough to marvel at how easily I had moved, almost as if the motion were lubricated.

Side note-For some years I have had a recurring nightmare-type dream consisting of imagery from a horror movie I unfortunately watched years ago. When this first began, back in 2011, it invoked a sickening fear that absolutely devasted me. Since then, I have done a helluva lot of inner work, focusing on using everything negative for a positive gain. Over this past month I have had about three dreams that contain the remnants of this original nightmare. The elements are washed-out and in pieces and I know what they are and just throw them away. I'm going to claim this as a victory over myself. To anyone struggling with inner issues that produce nightmares I advise you to take the Hero Path, go inside and challenge the most frightening thing you can find, challenge it to combat. Never back down, always go forward. Turn the fear into courage. Hail Odin!

Short scenes, terrible night of sleep according to fitbit, despite Huberman cocktail (first time it's failed...I went a little light on the Mag L-Threo, maybe need the full 144mg?)

+ playing in a rehearsal/concert, lots of solos, fun music. Then I get a glance at the sheet music I was supposed to be playing, it's made up of a lot of boring whole notes, and weird 16-/32-64th notes.

+ (I'm a?) warrior monk, and I/we're upset that we have to fight (some other warriors?), I thought when we signed up that we'd be fighting exclusively creatures from the forrest. Arrive at a door, there's a pile of books there, these will lead to wisdom. They're all Sherlock Holmes books. Snow or sawdust is blown away revealing a name carved in block letters in the stone, WHEATON. Find him and we'll find the truth (?). Inside the building, I'm balancing on a walkway high above the story below, a bit concerned about falling.

+ Vacuuming the insides of a suitcase. I'm showing (my wife?) how to do it properly, you have to use a circular motion of the brush head to get all the stuff up. Towards the latch there are a lot of short whiskers or animal hair.

non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid FA / AP

At an office with coworkers but during the weekend. Some team building thing, which includes a sleepover at the office. First day all goes smoothly and we do our meetings and activities normally. Then at night we party, and from thereon all descends into chaos and debauchery, with lots of booze and sex. Some guy passed out and others put him on the xerox machine with his pants down and are printing dozens of photocopies of his butt. Maybe someone drugged us, I wonder. Next day, when I start feeling sober, I notice there's security cameras all over and I panic, because I remember doing some sex stuff right under some of the cameras. I tell my colleagues about it and they don't care. Some claim the cameras must be turned off, but I go check a central console that provides info on the cameras and I confirm they are on. Unfortunately, for security reasons, the console does not give access to the recordings nor allows to shut it down, it is just informative stuff. I then think if the office is all clean and tidy, maybe nobody will feel curious to see the recordings. If someone does and finds out what happens, they might end up on the web on some porn website and it will be the end of me. So I start taking out the trash and tidying things up frantically, in an effort to hide whatever happened during the night. The others really don't care and are already waiting for their ubers and lyfts. I find a document briefcase that seems abandoned. Nobody claims it and it is indeed mostly empty except for a crumbled paper inside, some kind of dirt at the bottom and something sticky in a pocket. It looks old and dirty and certainly should go to the trash, but first I look into all its pockets and crevices, as I always tend to find something useful or important left behind. And there is indeed a small blue plastic box, the kind that usually contains jewellery. I open it up and also contains some crumbled small pieces of paper, but beneath it isa bunch of necklaces and earrings that look like gold, but I am not sure. Then Fernanda looks over and she says "Oh, that's gold alright, 35 karats." And I am like "How can you tell?" And she just smirks and I remember she is into fashion and all things luxury, so I trust her judgement. Others call me a lucky bastard and I put it away before they start getting ideas. There's a few thousand euros in gold right there.

back to "morning of" for labelling DJ entries.

Night of rest. some light recall. Only one bathroom trip. despite late light meal, I slept well, with pretty good fitbit sleep numbers:

87 score (after 3 days in a row of 91!): 7:40 asleep, :49 awake 1:15 deep, 1:47 REM, 93% below resting, 4% restless

earlier:

+ on top of a very high cliff overlooking a lake. A girl to my left dives head first and I watcher her hit the water with her hands out in front of her, I think the impact on her head must have been a doozy. Then I jump. It's a long way down and takes longer than I thought to reach the water, I hit with flat feet with a smack that's not too painful and I continue very deeply down, when my momentum stops I look up and the top is waaay far above me. I begin swimming and it takes me a very long time to get back to the surface, and I feel like my lungs are really beginning to ache with the strain of holding in the air. Eventually I make it up to the surface and take some deep breaths.

mid:

+ in a pool, I want to put on goggles and dive under water and look around

later:

+ with people in places: view of a long trailer for hauling large/long vehicles, it moves over a bumpy road and makes a lot of noise at the trailer rattles when it hits these bumps

+ talking to people, someone in a high position of authority is planning to quit and return in a new capacity, then someone else threatens to do the same, I think they're just copycatting the first person

Attempt #2 -- long, vivid, stable, super high res, "more real than waking," epic LD.



Wow. Wow wow wow. 4mg galantamine and 600mg Alpha GPC taken at the 3hrs waking....led to a WILD (in every sense of the world) lucid romp through FAs, more vivid than waking, ultra-stable, high-res, super-realistic, multi-scene, long LD (felt like an hour, definitely 30 minutes or more), and follow-on vivid non-lucids in later sleep cycles. This is the 2nd time I've tried it this year (the first being Nov 2, about 3 weeks ago).
After taking the supps, it took me somewhere around 30-60 minutes to fall asleep again. I spent the time relaxing body and mind with the idea of falling asleep unconsciously and having a DILD in subsequent sleep cycles. I took it early because of past issues with falling back asleep and I wanted to make sure I fell asleep again quickly after taking the supps. Instead, after that timeframe mentioned, I felt the familiar deepening feeling of sleep, and then WHAM! I was hit with a wave of vibrations the like of which I've never experienced before. I'm not unfamiliar with REM atonia sensations, I've felt vibrations many times before. But these were massive, strong, and accompanied by a sensation like my heart was stopping. I even sort of (maybe in a dream) half-raised up in bed to shake off the vibrations because they were so unpleasant. But I lay back down, they continued for a bit, then subsided, and I tried to imagine entering a scene. I detected slight movement in the visual field, and I tried to imagine a scene on a vehicle, and I shortly appeared in a bus or train moving past a moving landscape. It faded in a few seconds and I thought "wow that sucks, all that time and such a short dream", ... and then woke in a FA on a bus non-lucid, and the dream continued non-lucid for a while, then after failing to fly, I did a nose pinch state test, and got fully lucid, and began the lucid adventure!

Dream contents, and following non-lucids TBD (20 minutes of voice recording recall, it's going to take 2 hours to transcribe!)

+ LUCIDD #274 after WILD entry (noted above), I feel myself awake lying on a seat on a bus. I feel that I'm pressing up against a person seated to the left of me. I sit up and I'm seated in the 2nd row on the right side of a traditional bus layout against the window. There are sections of a newspaper around me, looks like a Sunday paper, there are colorful sections including a comics section, I move them section by section to the now empty left side of the seat. I create quite a tall pile of these papers, trying to keep them in order (I wonder if this is the newspaper of the two guys sitting in front of me?). My group (2-3 people, including [1st] wife?) get up and it's time for us to get off, I stand up and try to shoulder a backpack, it's heavy with lumpy objects making it uncomfortable on the back, as I stand up some cards/papers fall out and I see that they are very important family sentimental papers, like kid's birthday cards to me, I'm concerned that if I get off the bus I will lose some of them. I pick them up and as I move past the 1st row or seats on the right a guy seated there says "that's what you get for having kids." I respond "just wait, it'll be your turn soon." We get off the bus.

Sort of a vague scene with a woman and man, both of which have a cloudy left eye (like glaucoma), the idea is that they're from the moon?

With the group who got off the bus, standing near a busy urban/suburban road, I recognize this as "Stevens Creek" or Santa Clara and say so. We're then in a mall parking lot, very large, there's a car ahead, a woman and kids are moving to it, and the kids run circles around the car. The car is parked back up against a drop off of about 3 feet, I move to it and stand over it looking out over the lower level of the parking lot. I have the urge to fly/glide [DS], but I think I won't fly in this case. I decide to try anyway, and sort of launch myself off the edge, and fall directly down and hit the pavement, getting a bit scratched up on the asphalt. I stand up, and do a nose pinch, and I can breathe. I'm really astonished by this and check a few more times. Yes, I can breathe, I'm dreaming! I'm amazed, it is so vivid, clear, bright, high-res, so waking like, nothing to indicate dream in the quality of the experience.

I notice a young woman clerk entering a store ahead of me. Brunette, attractive. I move in to the store and see displays of lingerie. She is continuing to the back of the store and I follow her with the idea of getting a fashion show from her in a back dressing room. I lead her in, it is a tiny closet space just barely big enough for one person to stand in, not even move, with us there together it's incredibly crowded. I tell her I want to see her undressed. She resists and says that she can't today. I then counter that "now, it's tomorrow, so you can." I keep trying to close the curtains but can't (someone outside keeps opening them?). I give up and we leave the room, as I walk past her colleagues seated at desks I sense disapproval, and I defend myself by saying "I didn't force her, I just invited her, she came in on her own." A male colleague seated at a desk, with a bread/mustache comments "you're a real piece of work: <accusation #1, 'A">, <something about a backpack>, <some third thing>". I feel these are unfustified charges and a bit confused by them, I'm trying to determine if accusation #1 is true or not, I think not. I didn't understand about the backpack, I asked to repeat that, he repeated again something about a backpack (with the idea of murder?), and says "this information comes straight from heaven." I look at him for a second then leave the store.

I enter the neighboring store, it is a small front office, with the sign "Steak and (soda?)" on the wall and a door to enter further inside, I don't want steak so I leave again.

I enter the next store, it is a Vietnamese/Asian (massage? beauty salon?), it is packed with people, mostly young pretty Asian women, some plain, (dressed in white?), I think there is a beauty/modeling contest going on here today. I'm looking at their faces, most have brown eyes. I try to enter deeper into the store through the crowd, but a manager blocks the entrance saying no one can go in. I turn back to the entrance and try to push my way out through the crowd, there's a petite woman in jeans in front of me and I give her a push on her butt to clear a space to leave, she doesn't complain just moves forwards. A security guy blocks the door and says there's no access out that way, I ignore him and leave saying my car is parked right outside. Outside, I don't see my car, I'm looking around for it. A bit farther away I see a car that may have once been mine but has been heavily modified, I hear a group of young guys sniggering behind me, I turn and look at them, I think they probably pranked me by transforming my car and moving it to a new parking spot.

I move back into the open area of the parking lot, between a couple of taller buildings to the left and right, 3-4 stories, past a group of young men who are hanging out talking. I look at their faces, some are slightly distorted, they ignore me. I decide to fly, try a quick superman take-off, it doesn't work. The dream is super vivid and waking realistic and stable the entire time. I try a frog swim and gain a bit of altitude, but it's slow going.

I fly past (on my right) a restaurant lounge, with a sign that reads "Beef Wellerman", and I see through the glass walls [DS] that inside are people wrapped in human-side "blankets" made of giant cooked steaks, all throughout the restaurant, 10-20 people wrapped in beef blankets.

I wake in my bed, it's dark, I'm lying on my left side (the side I went to sleep on after taking the galantamine), I suspect a FA, nose pinch, I can breathe, I'm still dreaming. I stand up quickly, throwing off the covers. I get a glimpse of my [1st?] wife lying in bed on my right, I immediately turn towards the window, which is closed by curtains. I see on the floor a pair of eyeglasses, and wonder if these are mine. I pick them up. They have a bright thing brass wire frame and on the right earpiece is a 2-inch length in the shape of a corkscrew. I think these are not mine. I part open the curtains with two hands and look at the window: it is made up of small (6 inch by 8 inch rectangular) blocks of glass held by thin, 1-inch wide strips of dark brown painted wood. The windows are locked with padlocks. I want to go out and so I pull open the left pane, it opens, and I look outside into an open courtyard, like a motel swimming pool courtyard. There are people there, a group of kids. I go down and interact with the people there. A mother there offers to bring another of her kids to me, one that can generate cinnamon (bread?) if you touch her in a certain way. I do this (wanting the cinnamon), and wake up slightly in bed doing that movement. A nose pinch shows
I'm awake.

Several vivid non-lucids follow, will record later.

False awakening

On an airplane. I look out the window and I am high in the sky. I decide I must have fallen asleep before takeoff. My mom is there.

Some dialogue.

I’m in cockpit view now but I'm not the pilot. The plane keeps going up.

I’m above the cockpit now outside of the plane. Think video game.

The plane is not flying right. It goes straight up and down then stalls out.

Now it's tumbling toward the ground. I sincerely believe I am about to die.

Another FA except I know its a dream but its a low level of lucidity as I am still invested in the previous scene.

I decide to rebuild the plane so it can fly correctly. Its still a video game view and the parts of the plane are very much like Terratech.

My son is with me discussing how to do it (we have been playing a lot of Terrtech together in waking life).

The wing pieces don’t look right and my son keeps making suggestions. Annoyed, I finally say, "Look we can just pretend it will work and it will work (knowing its a dream).
It doesn't have to look right."
]
I wake up.

non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid FA / AP

With Nighthawk, somewhere with other people around. Looks like an office as we are sitting in office chairs with wheels, but also feels like a café as people are just chilling in nearby tables. He is talking about something and I want to get closer to him, so I give an impulse to my chair to slowly roll to his side. But I pull it a bit too strongly and I roll too fast and bump into him. As a result I grab his legs and put my hands too close to his crotch and his reaction is to flinch and push himself back. I say sorry and he asks if I did it on purpose and I honestly can't tell. I feel like it was both accidental and intentional to a certain extent. I am also upset that he reacted that way but I guess it is to do with being in a public place with other people, so I don't insist and we just continue a normal conversation.

At my parent's house but the house looks totally different from what it really was. My bedroom is normal but it is attached to some shed that has the roof cracking in the middle and we are all waiting for the moment it falls apart and trying to keep everyone in safety. But when it falls apart, the roof in my bedroom also falls apart and then half of my parent's room also goes down. We are tryig to take it calmly and make plans to cover it all with plastics until we get the reconstruction done, but my father starts calculating the costs and it is despairing. Anyway, we adapt to living like this. But for no good reason I now have to shower in my room, as the shower head is right above my bed. So I wet my bed completely. My mom suggests I wash quickly to reduce the amount of water soaking the bed and I wonder how I am going to sleep on it later as it won't dry until then. Then I remember we have a second bathroom with a shower that wasn't affected and wonder why we ain't using it. Then I become aware that I am dreaming and I teleport involuntarily to a street in a city with very modern architecture mixed with old palaces at an ocean front. I want to see the place but then I notice how long the street is and I don't want to walk it all the way, so I lift off to see it from above. I see this shore line to my left, another to my right and some more in front but far away. I dive in the water just for fun and wonder what to do with my lucidity as I don't have anything prepared. All that occurs to me is to summon Buddha Tara. All I get instead is a red or pink tide on the water, as if something is gathering to form a shape, but it never does. I focus harder on any Buddha to appear and one starts forming and getting out of the water. It is actually a white porcelain figure, looking much more like Budai, not any Buddha. Not very fat but a little chubby and with thin green lines making beautiful designs all over its "skin". It is human sized and I touch it to see if it is a statue or a living being. I am still in the water and he has risen above it, but I manage to touch its arms and legs and I am surprised that it feels like porcelain but also like a peachy skin at the same time and it is warm. It feels so pleasurable to the touch that I continue caressing it, I reach for the neck and chest. The statue then comes to life and scolds me for touching him inappropriately. He gets mad and summons guardians from the water. I start feeling threathened by the figures that start emerging and grabbing me. There is a floating platform nearby and I get up on it. A strong current forms and drags it, but I allow myself to go with the flow. Then I hit the shore and some monks appear requesting me to come along. I ask what is it and they say some Rinpoche requires my presence. I hope it's what I am expecting but deep down I feel that it is not. I follow them anyway and they take me to a house. We pass through a room where some monks or lamas are sitting watching tv and they take me to a bedroom in the back. I feel uncomfortable when all I see is a bed and a lama I don't know in a poorly lit room. But then I see there is a young lady laying down on the bed, I feel like she is his companion. I ask what is it they need me for. And he explains she can't sleep for a week or so and she is going mad and they are desperate. I ask if we can talk and he asks her to come forward and listen to me. At first she looks angry and uncooperative. I don't know what she expects from me, but I start by telling her about a friend I have that also couldn't sleep for a week and it was because of anxiety he wasn't even aware of. And suddenly her face changes and she is interested. I ask if there is anything in her life, past or future, that could be the source of anxiety. Something that happened and she can't let go thinking about it or something that is going to happen and she is consumed in fear or doubts about it. Slowly she admits it may be fhe latter. She is studying something and she is going to do an exam for which she feels totally unprepared and she thought she wasn't worrying at all, but now she sees she just wasn't aware of how the concern was consuming her. I give advice on how to let go and examples of how my friend managed to let go and she seems definitely calmer.