Something about watching Apollo for a night. I’m with Melissa and walking over to Crystal’s house (it seems close to where we live). We enter the house and it seems fairly large. It seems dim but moonlit. I think we have Stella with us and we’re going to stay here or bring Apollo over to our place. I’m outside in a place that looks similar to Frenchman’s. With Stella, I’m jogging down a gray asphalt path. It’s a pretty steep downhill and continues in a straight line. We pass more and more cars and people the further we go. It levels off now and we turn to go back uphill, which already feels harder.
Been a while. Jamie 1 Just seeing her face in a flash. Jamie 2 (Last night) A dream she is smiling at me. She is wearing a fancy, black, yuppie outfit. We hug and kiss. Took forever to get a good dream like this.. Construction Me and a co-worker are exploring a large under construction building
Non lucid. I was a pre-teen and for some reason my mom and new step dad were going to trade houses with his brother and their family. I was pissed and pointing out how one kid had damaged so much of it. I threatened to move away on my own as soon as I could. In one scene I was in the new house and trying to take a shower but it was inn a cramped area that ii could not fully stand up in. The dream was emotional and seemed to have hidden meaning.
I was testing reality by trying to TK small objects and found that I could move objects with my mind. that made me lucid. I eventually decided to try and find a person from my past real life, but not by just summoning them.. I would try to go to where they might be and also try to keep the landscape somewhat in line with my home city in real life. I started flying in a yogi meditation position but was not satisfied with the speed/ I have been experimenting with why I have trouble with really fast flight while maintaining a landscape/ I only seem to be able to fly at what feels like 60 mph. I switch to Superman flight with no improvement. I try swimming through the sky while still in a Superman like pose. It helps a bit. I stop and get a odd idea. I summon a chair and sit in it braced as if it where the seat of a jet fighter. I imagine the chair taking off driving me forward like a jet. This worked and i seemed to be able to go much faster. I went to where I pretended this person would now be working and did arrive at the work place I had imagined. It was very detailed with lots of customers and workers. They were not around. I asked a DC and was told they had quit and now worked in another building. I flew a short ways and decided I was there so a building appeared. I found it deserted and it was huge. I believed (pretended) I had heard someone moving and "knew" it was them. Around the corner I found another person. Nope, BS, I found who I was looking for no matter what the dream said. The dream gave up on trying to add randomness and it turned out to actually be the person I was looking for. (note: poor brain/dream trying to give me some randomness and adventure and I go bossing it around. Something for me to work on.)
Updated 06-22-2022 at 07:22 AM by 12783
I was walking south with Brandy, but a second later I was walking north past the same intersection with her and Brad. I tell them that this is a dream and I am off to go play. The change in continuity had made me lucid. They question me on what I mean and I point out that we are all now inside a phone booth on the same corner. Clearly a dream. I explore a city that looks a bit like the sci-fi stuff you may see in the show Eureka. Here is the big moment. I notice one of the DCs is actually an astral entity. It is a middle aged woman and is very familiar. I suspect she is my first dream guide from perhaps 20-30 years ago. She had handed me off to "The Monk" who later handed me off to "The Young Women" This woman I am thinking is the stern older woman who first trained me so long ago. She had a body guard type who seemed to dislike me and it often caused trouble. I am thinking she has made an appearance again for some reason after many years. She is seated and calmly watching me. There is a type of deep connection that happens between astral beings (including the dreamer) and appears to be focused through what I visualize as the eyes. She is gazing on me with this mystic sense/vision (sorry, it is beyond words). I meet the gaze with my own gaze/ astral sense thingy. We become connected in a telepathic bond of a sort, again I would have trouble explaining. It is worth noting that perhaps I am known to some of these things from multiple lifetimes (this has been suggested to me by them), and perhaps I have spent time with them between physical/ earth lives, but while incarnated on earth and projecting from a point attached to my human body I am limited in my memory and understanding. I also suffer from a sort of drunkenness and confusion due to the frankly weird ass nature of astral travel. She does not seem to be trying to boss me around or intimidate me as she often has in the past. I decide to talk to her much more like an equal than I have in the past (subservient/ awestruck/ afraid- note she comes across god-like.) I ask her, "can you explain to me who you are?" It is telepathic and includes a bit of "what are you" and "why me?" She intensifies the connection and starts to communicate. It sounds sort of like the adults in Peanuts comics "whawhahwaaa" I focus very intense and try turning my ear to her. Now I am breaking the eye connection and realize I do not even actually have ears. I reinvest in the eye contact. I ask her to be patient and go slow as I am having trouble understanding. She slows down and this is what I hear telepathically. "A while ago (decades? lifetimes?) my brother (whawhawha unclear) who is a god, took notice of you and (whawhawhaaa unclear). We have been observing you since then and (whawhawhaaa unclear). I have something to share with you (show you? give you?)" At this point she stands up and moves suddenly very close as if to kiss me but only in the sense of bring our mouths together. Suddenly she is exhaling/ vomiting a stream of multicolored energy that goes into my mouth as if I am inhaling it. All the visuals change and I experience some magical thing involving my energy body/soul that I do not understand. Then it is over and we are standing near each other. She talks to me with out the telepathic eye stuff. Oddly I can understand the entities when talk is this way. What ever the message she gave me at first it was something mystic and hard to grasp and is different to just chatting. She says they are having a celebration for a friend and that I am welcome to join them as I have been behaving myself for awhile now (I have got in plenty of trouble here in the past). There is cake! Now one thing in this realm is that some things are just dream images and other things are made of something that is real and quantifiable to them. This is real astral cake (my interpretation) if that makes sense. It is wonderful and I eat two big handfuls of it. If anything happened after that i have no more recall.
Updated 06-22-2022 at 07:01 AM by 12783
In which I must crawl through a small hole to enter a cramped sleeping space... I'm in a familiar house with extended family. I climb up a rickety attic ladder to a small opening in the ceiling that leads up to a storage loft. The space is small and dusty. There are blankets thrown across the floor and curtains on the wall. It smells dank, and I have to crawl on my hands and knees to pass through. At the end of the space, there is a tiny hole which I can only fit through by first stretching one arm and shoulder through, then my head, then the other arm and shoulder. I feel compressed and stuck around my rib cage, but once I get both my arms through the other side, I'm able to push the rest of my body through and pop out on the other side. I'm now in a larger attic room with an A-frame roof. The ceiling in this room is high enough that I can stand up fully in the middle. There are four mattresses on the floor in this room, and two of them already have suitcases and clothes near them. Somehow, I realize that the other two are where R and I will stay. I think what a hassle it will be crawling in and out of that hole every time I need to change clothes or sleep. In which I'm sharing a bed with a man who is presumably my lover... I'm sleeping in a bed with an older bald white man. As we are in the bed together, I assume he is my lover. I think of how I need to get up soon to let the cattle out to graze. The man is snoring. I'm pretty sure he wants to have sex with me, and I'm wondering how I can wake him up and get it over with before the cattle start to become restless. I remember a dream that I had many years ago in which this same man took me regularly to his house for hookups despite my not really knowing exactly how to initiate anything with him and despite him never really having much to say to me. His house was dark with blue lights. There were heavy carpets on the floor, and blankets and curtains draped across the walls and furniture. His bedroom was empty of any personal items, just a room slightly larger than the bed with nothing else in it other than a digital alarm clock. I start to wonder if that was really a dream or if it really happened. Did I really dream about this man before I met him? Then another woman comes into the room. She tells me that he has lately been paying attention to her. She sits on the edge of the bed and we discuss how she is going to attract him and take my place, and we plan how she can do it in such a way that I can return to driving the cattle.
In which I'm riding a unicycle toilet... We are still at K & S's house, but their parents and R's parents are all present as well. I excuse myself to go to the bathroom. The toilet seat is on top of a six foot tall unicycle, leaning in the corner of their hallway. I climb up to the top of it, bracing my arms and feet against the walls of the hallway corner, and eventually pull my pants down to place my butt on the toilet seat on top. Then I strap myself in. I have to keep pedaling to balance myself while simultaneously trying to shit into the seat. This requires me to pedal the unicycle through the house, all around the family in the living room and kitchen. I say that I'm embarrassed about this and I apologize to everyone, but they all just shrug their shoulders and keep drinking chai. It's normal, everyone has to poop.
bedtime 23:20, out of bed 08:10 final waking ~07:30 some dreaming, but memories from earlier in the night faded quickly emphasized going back to sleep quickly for good, 8 hours of sleep need to record keywords at each waking. earlier: + see boy scout equipment lying around on ground, see my inflatable ThermaRest pad, I'm picking out/up equipment, choose an [imaginary] saw? Blue colored? large, rounded teeth, like a saw-tooth shark nose + following a (plane?car) up a narrow windy hill road, I'm tailgating it, it's (we're?) going to take off? later: Some vivid moments but the memories really fade quickly upon waking. Need to work on grabbing recall instantly after waking before even the smallest movement + away from home base at some sort of cafe/restaurant/rest stop, I walk by some girls on my right and glance side-long at them, I see one (I know her?) with large breasts, the outline/shape of which are shown by her clothing. Talking with someone about whether or not we should return, considering it's a 30-minute drive, they encourage me to go on home, so I do. Arriving near to home I'm laying back and spreading my legs wide and getting everything "aired out", I'mr riding on something without roof or walls. On the grounds, I see a straight long lower alley (of grass?) (with sloping sides leading down into it) leading far in to the distance, passing under a dark bridge at 90 degrees to the path. In the distance there is a (white? light colored) wall with graffiti written on it in different colors, words, and young people are busy scrubbing it off Spoiler for sensitive content: + Viewing screens of pictures, some racy, I'm looking for the X-rated versions which I recalled I had seen earlier, but now I can't see them, they're of a girl and a guy in bed, the guy is wearing red robes/pajamas. Then I'm looking at a large screen with pictures of girls faces, and there's someone there also with me, I don't like being observed [DS]
earlier: + on beach, scuba/ snorkel training to left in the surf, I turn my back to the ocean, am hit by large wave, and dragged back in to the water, I think I'm a great swimmer but I am completely at the mercy of the waves and powerful current. A wave pushes back up to beach (but I can't get out) but on a second wave I get my feet underneath me and run quickly up the beach out of the reach of further waves + discussion with group about ski trip plans, some are upset we didn't get going at 1am later: + in (large-ish) room in house, lying on floor, with combo sniper rifle/shotgun. sighting at cork lying on floor along wall curved large radius meeting joint of floor and wall, switching back and forth between rifle mode and shotgun mode (there was a small level to do this about halfway down the barrel of the gun). I'm trying to decide between bullet/rifle mode and shotgun mode. I could try for shotgun mode at first to make sure I hit the cork to make sure my sighting is correct. I think I'm close enough that the blast should be fairly contained and not fan out too much to the surrounding area. I decide to shoot, and squeeeeeeze trigger slowly (as I remember is recommended) and take the shot cork zips all the way down to the far wall, bounces, and returns back to its original location, S1 & S2 come in and I say "hey did you see that?! How it bounced right back?" Then turn around looking at stuff on floor/wall boundary with S2, I think about using (crumpled up newspapers?) to pick it up and take/throw it away, I say to S2 "You can ask S1 to help you with this.' Looking at toy hokey game, seems like 2 vs 2 players but there are more levers (about 8), I'm looking at the right-side levers, the right-most is missing the rubber twisty handle with ridges. The lever about 3rd or 4th from the right is pretty seriously bent and wrapped around another lever, I untangle them a bit and comment on this bent lever, think about about the play of the game and shooting the puck around. + giving a tour of frat row to some (friends?), including young woman. We're riding by vehicle but the view is unobscured. My gaze is fixed on the frat buildings on the right side of the street relative to direction of car. It's dark/twilight. The frat buildings are tall (3-4 stories) and dark (no lights within). I'm trying to look through the windows to see the things I expect to see inside (trophies?). At the end of the street the group is walking and we encounter a van that drives up and stops near me on a "T" intersection, it approaches from the right. I know I need to arrange a meeting with these guys (they're govt officials?), I "remember" we pre-arranged a meeting at a point on the street back from where we (walking group) came from. I tell the driver we'll met you there. I turn our group around and start walking towards the meeting point. I think we're walking on a street different from where the van is going to park and I wonder if they'll exit their vehicle and walk around to our street to meet us. With group, there is a requirement for some of us (me and 2 other guys, one an older man) to drink a drink with tea, sugar, and some bright fruit juice. It comes time, but all I can find is tea with a lot of sugar, so I drink it. The man comments about the missing juice, calling it "<something> urine (?)".
+ losing L Some sort of business proposition (with L?) about ambulances, I don't understand and ask for clarification. There is a business meeting on an open field outside in twilight with a large group of women. They're all very positive about it, and I'm impressed at the swift level of approval of our idea. To my right on the grass I see some lines of what I believe is wiped/scuffed dog crap (it's brown and the right texture). I have a new romantic object and I'm really torn about what to do about L. I'm planning to leave L for the risky new romance. I think it's not fair to L. I speak with her and tell her that I need to move on. I think I'm taking a huge risk, I really love L and don't want to lose her. In a large auditorium [DS] for a talk/presentation/show, standing among the seats in the center, then I move (with L) to and aisle on the left hand central side, and an usher comes up and tells us to clear the aisle. I get annoyed and point back to where I was and say that I already had a seat. I look around and see that the seats have filled up where we previously were and all through the auditorium, and the only free spots are in the extreme corners/edges. I see a string of free seats near me and head into them with L, moving from the left central aisle towards the center of the auditorium. I see that JaCon (T5) is seated there, so I go up to him and L and I sit down, JC is on my right and L is to my left. I wonder about how to introduce L: my former love? my friend? I decide to say "JC, this is Lena, Lena, this is JC, my friend from T5. She externs her hand across me under my ams on the arm rests to shake JC's hand. I take her hand in mine after that, and I'm deeply saddened by the fact that I won't be able to take her hand in the future. I'm adjusting some written materials now that L and I are breaking up. I'm looking at my signature close up on paper. I recognize the first letter of my first name written in cursive but it is still strange and not quite from the alphabet. It's written in blue/green. I read then my last name in a stylized script font, very clear and regular shapes like on a computer. This is not my handwriting. I realize that it was written this way specifically to be highly legible. + glass house There is a glass house on a hill, someone breaks in there is tons of broken glass everywhere, there is a (glass?) dog lying on the ground a bit away from the house, covered with sequins that gets covered by the sharp shards of glass. I start to clear away the glass from the dog, it's owner (woman?) approaches later: + bus/music Seated on a bus (left-hand side near the front, where I used to site in Jr High) with a girl putting together a [my instrument]. I'm using a bottom piece from a professional player, mixing and matching pieces to build up an instrument. The player and an older woman (organizer?) are there, standing in the aisle to my right. The (woman?) recognizes me as a (normal and bass version of my instrument) player, and I acknowledge that yes, I play both. The player takes back his borrowed bottom piece saying I don't need it, I think I do but then realize I don't and say I could just play the bass version while the girl could play the normal version. + LDD #266 LD DILD DDILD stairway stars lucid man hat take me to group goose girl take her hand continue walking dream fades repeat non-lucid ask man take me to group, enter auditorium [DS], from right side (facing stage), go to left side (or am just there), undress girl (many layers of pants!), ushers come and kick us both out, heavy makeup, I remove her makeup and we sneak back inside the auditorium Climbing a stairway outside evening softer light, looking up into the sky above bare trees at the top of the staircase. Around the moon I notice a shifting / dancing pattern of bright little solid yellow "pentagram" 5-point shaped stars. They're fading in and out, becoming fuzzy/vague, then returning to clarity. Especially when they rotate in a circle that really gets my attention, I recognize that as a dream sign, and do a nose pinch, I can breathe, now I'm lucid. I walk up to the top of the stairs, there are people walking buy, I grab the arm of a man with a straw hat and tell him to take me to a large group of people, and I add that I know that they are nearby (so as not to waste time). I begin walking on a path to the right. An attractive young woman (short brunette hair) comes along and I reach out and give her a squeeze but don't want to get too engrossed, so I just take her right hand and turn to the right and continue walking along the path with her, happy, looking around at the detail, and the dream fades... I then repeat this plot non-lucidly (not a pure replay the visuals are different): I find a man and task him to take me to a large group of people. I enter an auditorium [DS] from the back right (facing stage). I find a young woman and begin pulling down her pants: there is layer after layer of pants and when I think I finally have reached the last one and expect to see her [ahem], there is nothing really to see. An usher comes and shoo's us out of the auditorium out of a left-side exit. The young woman's face is very heavily made up with colorful makeup. I clean off her face and then want to sneak back in to the auditorium past a security turnstyle, hoping that we won't be recognized. + fire room In a medium-sized room in a house, combined bedroom (left) living room (right). In the living room there is a fireplace with an automated fire system. I'm watching it mesmerized by its changing form and function. It has wheels and gears and metal bars/lines that move and shape change. There is fire spewing out of the open pipes. It's shaped in rectangles and a spinning circle in the middle. I think that this could be dangerous for us in the room. The fireplace changes into a flamethrower shooting a stream/column of fire into the room, sweeping the room from corner to corner, I think there's no way to escape. SphGrv is there lying on the bed on the left side, with her brother(?). She is lying in an provocative post and I think I catch a glimpse of a portion of her [ahem]. I wonder if she would like it if I went over there and engaged with her? Then she and others are on a central bed. There is an old fat perv guy trying to get her and the women drunk on vodka. He is pouring them huge glasses of the stuff, I can't believe the amount, it must be like 100ml or more, even for SG. SG takes the glass but does not drink, I can see she clearly does not want to. The man himself has poured and is drinking bourbon. He's encouraging her to drink. I'm talking to him, asking him about what kind of bourbon he has. He responds gruffly not wanting to share, (that it would spoil his taste?), I reply I don't want to drink it, I just wanted to know what it was. Later I get SG aside and tell her I'm really glad she avoided drinking the vodka. +[f] Someone at my pepper! It was growing on a plant [waking life true!] I was nursing along, and someone picked it without my permission! By the way this is my 800th DJ entry on DV!
I’m with Melissa and taking Stella to a pool. It feels like the pool at our complex but a little different. It seems we’re approaching it the same way as we really would, but there is no fence. Right away I notice two guys (one in the regular at work, Blair) and their black and white border collie in the water. Stella doesn’t react to it. Now I feel alone or just separate from them. In the pool, which looks like a long oval with a skinny section in the middle that also seems to be a hot tub, I swim and submerge myself. Someone? asks if I’m doing it to get away from everyone. I think to myself that she’s not entirely wrong.
(fragment) I’m sleeping in a room with Melissa. It’s unfamiliar and the bed feels like it’s in an alcove. I wake up and feel like we have fans on and the AC on a very low temperature, so I ask if we can turn it off. *I’m sure this is from sleeping in a much colder temperature than we have been, especially with the covers coming off of me at times.
Phil Lesh is showing me a round trip route on a map. The route is marked in red or yellow and passes through what looks like Idaho, Montana, and Wyoming (possibly including Colorado and Utah). I think it sounds like a fun trip and really consider driving it. He says there are two options through the state at the end - I see the line snaking up the full color topographical map. He says the one way is just small towns and Smith’s (the store) and the other is scenery. His tone makes the small towns sound unpleasant and I think I’d want to go the way with the scenery, envisioning both.
I’m with either Julia or Jessica or both in some unfamiliar room. It seems more like a motel than a house. Someone (the maintenance guy that lives in the building next to us) starts coming over and I know he’s going to get in, in a threatening way. I go around to lock all the doors (the locks look like that on the side door at work). He’s here now and saying something threatening as he tries to force open the locked handle. I watch it bend from the force. He’s inside this room now, facing Jessica and Julia, me facing his back. I watch as he shoots at something (not them) with a tiny black pistol. I think I now run to get a gun, shooting him when I return. He lies face down and I kneel on top to restrain his arms, as he’s still struggling. I call out for them to get a gun (I guess I’m not aware that I just had one) so I can finish it. It takes a while, but I think they finally do. I think I shoot him in the head, looking down at the resulting carnage. His body is moved now and I see indentations in the carpet and the spherical silver bullets about the circumference of a quarter within. *I can’t recall many emotions during the last part of this dream. It seems that what I was doing did not feel wrong, though it’s obviously disturbing to write down now.
I’m in a large house on the ocean shore. It is Dad’s birthday, but Makayla and I jokingly run away from him when he shows up. He takes it personally and the look on his face says so. I’m going to try to find him a book here to make up for it. This room looks like a large foyer, books lining the top of every wall on a high shelf. They all look like Franklin Library or similar. Some are more ornate than I’ve ever seen. There are a couple of thick Dostoevskys, the binding looking like his portrait in stained glass. I think about getting these for myself. I know that Dad wants [a certain title] that has to do with maritime, so I search for it. I do find the title, but it’s combined in one volume with The Red and the Black by Stendhal. I open it to find it’s in a weird font that is pre highlighted, I think each character in a different color. I don’t like it. I find one more pre highlighted and spiral bound. Again, I don’t like it. Al shows up now and offers to help. Looking to the shelves, I tell her I’ve looked through every single title. She hands me a book on the old west as a recommendation. I flip through it and see some familiar figures in the illustrations/photographs, such as Judy Garland as Dorothy. Appreciative, I tell her I will take this one. Now, through a window or open door I see Dad walking along the beach with a beer bottle in hand and talking to himself. It is dark out. He’s sad about us abandoning him and, staggering and slurring, says he is going to see [someone]. I feel really bad about this. Now, Julia is here and it feels late at night. She says something and I say “these shrooms are starting to feel good” (I must’ve taken them a bit ago). I go into a room here, hers?, that has a nicely made bed with a fuzzy gray color theme. The rest of the room has the same aesthetic. *Melissa asked last night what I’m getting Dad for Father’s Day and I told her I didn’t know. She then brought up Carlos’ birthday. I commented on the Franklin Library copy of Ulysses I’m reading and grabbed a Franklin Library copy of Crime and Punishment at work. The things in brackets are specific details present in the dream that I’ve since forgotten.
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