lucid

goal LD 3/10 for remainder of Feb. 7 to go!

+ bowling: lots of shots making 1-pin-left spares. I have oil on my fingers and the ball drops down several times when I lift it behind me, I try to wipe it off. A girl is bowling on the same lane at the same time. I run down to the end of the lane and there is a giant ball there with some object that I take as a prize and run off.

+ monsters, bar
Big Evil Bos is chastising a minion, the minion manages to talk his way out of it, placing blame on some other schmuck, convincing the evil boss that he's the right minion to help the boss do things. BEB agrees, and tells the minion to assign the other minion to "our most difficult rescue job."

In a large open area with a bar, we're captive, I go to the bar and eat some of the little pickled martini white onions [always loved those!]. There are some vouchers with cash there that I use to buy our way out of the captivity, the captor is amazed I'm willing to spend all that cash, but I say our mission is critical and we must leave immediately.

+ hunt, bikers

Looking top-down at a map, the lead guy changes the course, it's a zig-zagging pattern. I start running with another guy along the course. I'm holding (or conjuring) a diagram/map and using gestures to stretch it and rotate it as we move along.

Some (enemies?) rough bikers were captured by another gang and being interrogated, they captives are standing at attention outside, one captive is sassy and answers a question something like "pull it outta yer ASS!" The captor leader is impressed by his courage and praises him.

We're on the hunt and reach a barrier. Some (fairies?) guards are blocking the way, they demand two severed fingertips from our group. Two guys slice off their fingertips and give them to the guard, who then heals them (re-attaching the fingertips) and lets us go on our way.

+ LD #177 room w/friends, historical origins of horror literature, phone call, sexy time(s), gollum attacks

The LD part was very notably extremely vivid with clear and bright visuals, and very stable with lots of successful control. Too bad I didn't remember loftier goals :/.

... early part forgotten. Some friends and I enter a large (hotel?) free-standing room. My ex-gf SB is there, some (guy?), and me. We're talking about how we're going to arrange to lie on the large bed. Bed-left is nearest the window and that's where I want to be, there is a row of high windows along the right side of the room as facing the room with back to the door. At the bed, SB is saying she wants to be next to me so she can touch me (woohoo I think!). But the guy doesn't want to be on the left side, and I don't want to be in the middle.

SB and the guy are talking about ordering a few hundred hamburgers to have them delivered. The thing is though that it's late, and they don't want to take large orders this late because the delivery guy has to deliver and return to the store before he can go home and they don't like doing that. Then SB and the guy are tossing giant greasy hamburgers around the room and they land on the bed, I say that's gross as they're leaving grease marks on the bed and I'm tossing them off of the bed.

There is some interlude in a different place where the history of horror literature is discussed. It is a "scary" portrait of a hand against some odd background. Then it's revealed that what happens is that a light comes on behind you, and a shadowy outline of the devil appears on the portrait, you can see the horns on his head. Then there's a brief thing about how the devil is just really some typical dumpy looking guy, and you could even call him "Bob" or "Ralph" and say "hey, how's it going, Bob?".

Back in the room I'm noticing the colors of sunrise already in the sky through the windows. Oh man it's late, the sun is already coming up! I get a phone call, it seems like my waking life ringtone. I answer the call and go outdoors outside the room to talk. A girl's voice answers, and she immediately goes off on a diatribe like "OMG! I can't believe you made me listen to that [my ringtone which she somehow heard?]! That's the most terrible thing that's happened to me in a long time! [Blah blah blah for a while]." Then I ask who is calling and whom are you trying to reach, a man's voice comes on briefly, and it's clear that it's a wrong number and I hang up. That sure was a weird phone call, I think. Wait! Weird!? <nose pinch> .

I'm dreaming! As always, I'm astounded at the convincing feeling of being awake. The dream is bright, clear, and stable. I immediately decide that since I've always wanted to have sex with SB in a lucid and "she's right there back in the room" that I'll walk back. It takes about 5-10 seconds to get back to the room/building, but there's no door there. I do not let that stop me, and I just phase through knowing I'll end up at the entrance to the room. I do. SB is there on the left side of the large room, and I go to here.

Spoiler for sexy time:

I move her to a small cushioned seat, (she's a bit uncooperative at first), and I start with giving her a kiss. Her face is very clear, it's a reasonable approximation of her looks when we were going out. She's fully dressed and so am I, and I try out something I've wanted to do for years and make a "ripping apart" two-handed gesture with my hands and command, "BE NAKED!" and instantly she is naked! I do the same to me, looking down at my fully clothed body, my pants/underwear vanish but my long-sleeved shirt remains! Oh well, that's good enough, I start in on getting a BJ from SB. In order to prevent my typical fast wake, I look to the left, and I look to the right in the room, while still feeling the BJ action. I then get the idea of doing a walking BJ, we'll go for a walk outside and SB will continue the BJ.

We get up and go outside and there's some confusion about the number of which "door" we must go through. I think oh let's just get on the pavement and do it right here, but SB's gone now. I think OK, I'll go back into the room.
I walk at the brick wall again at the place where the door should have been and pass through with no issues like it's an illusion. But instead of being in the room, I'm now in a hallway with girls standing around outside the ladie's room. There are some really nice looking girls there and I move to bring a bunch of them into the ladie's room with me.

Inside the ladies' room, it's like a big fancy restaurant, sumtuous wood and cushioned seating, very posh, I think briefly yeah those ladies know how to do it. There is a girl standing at a podium and I know she is the maitre d' (!). I go over to her, she's not attractive, but va-va-VOOM her assistant is HOT. Yes, you'll do nicely I think.

Spoiler for sexy time #2:

I maneuver her to a couch and just like #1, she's fully clothed and so am I, so again I do "BE NAKED!" and she's fully naked, and again I command myself "BE NAKED" and again my shirt remains, haha! I pull the shirt out of the way and scootch her hips forwards to the edge of the couch and I lean down and take a whiff of her lightly-pubed (ahem), and catch a very nice distinct female scent. Just about to dive in when ...

BOOM! Pain! Something bony and sharp has jumped onto my back in between my shoulder blades! It's like a 1/2-sized gollum very bony, I think he's the security system of the bathroom and has been sicc'ed on me. At first I pry one of his hands off of me, take out my "lightsaber dagger" and motion to cut off his hand. He's off of my back then but still targetting me. The unattractive maitre d' is standing nearby and I command her "you have to f^&* him." She responds saying "What!? NO!" I then tell gollum "you can f^&* her!" and that distracts him away from me (he says "Yeah!" and seems excited at the prospect) and I turn back to my girl #2.

Spoiler for sexy time #2, contd, mild dominance:

I tell her to put her arms up over her head and she lifts her forearms up to her shoulders. No, not good enough, I tell her again to put her arms up over her head, she slightly lifts her elbows but it's not what I wanted. I grab her arms then and push them fully up over her head. She then gets it and exclaims, "You mean THIS shit!?" And I answer "Yes, THAT shit."

and I wake up...

I was really excited by the quality of the last dream and LD so I never made it back to sleep for 2 hours until my alarm went off.

Went to bed at 00:00 after taking 50mg 5HTP, WBTB from 05:50 to 06:00 taking 8mg Galantamine.
Relaxed deeply but stayed awake for over an hour - turned right and drifted to sleep. I was dreaming that I was in my room moving in the dark having difficulty due to things in my way and sheets cought on my leg - then it hit me: am I dreaming? Finger through Palm:+!!! Yes, This is a dream! I move around in the dark and free myself from the sheets but there is something covering my right eye. I get out in the balcony and take off easily! I fly around over people in a big field moving effortlessly - it's beautilul! I hear an engine sound while flying. Then I loose the image and I am now in a dark room. I remember to do the ToTM. Since I am inside I can't look at the sky, so I try for the call to another planet (I had pre-decided to call to Essassani and speak with Bashar using FryingMan's voice dialing idea). I look in both my pockets (I am wearing a sports trousers) but there is no phone. Then I hear a phone ringing - its in my back bag! I reach and get the bag and in it there is my iPhone. The screen is black but I simply say: I want to speak with someone on Essassani! To my surprise, a male voice answers: Sissassani is not here.....some gibberish and:...here is only color yellow. I say again: I want to speak with Bashar! Voice: ....some gibberish and: not here. I find the door and get outside. The image is very clear now and I am at a yard with trees between old-fashioned buildings. I try again and this time I manage to free my left eye from whatever was covering it. I remembered the "look at the sky ToTM" and look up: The sky between the trees is all covered with clouds. Thick grey-purple rain clouds, no clear part of the sky (interestingly, today the sky was exactly like that while yesterday it was clear...). I start walking through the yard... ... there is more but I will keep this part private

Created Saturday 20 February 2016

I succefully attained a WILD, and got what I believe was one of the TOTMs. There was a dream before the first awakening, which I partially recalled immediately after it occurred, though I remember nothing of it now.

Spoiler for Spoilered to save page space:

Dream 1 - Alien Codec Call

Scene 1 - No Sight, No Problem!
I was in bed, feeling as if I badly needed to use the bathroom. I thought to get up, but found it difficult to move, making me very suspicious. Soon, I felt a familiar dizzying sensation, making me certain I was near a dream state.

Now, I knew I could just roll off the bed, thinking I'd do this by wall-phasing for the TOTM. But, I was sure the nearest wall I could easily maneuver to was a bit far, not to mention that I was blindfolded at the moment, so I tilted myself off the nearest ledge instead, doing so with ease.

By that point, I was slowly descending into a vast pit of nothingness. Wondered why I ended up here, until remembering I didn't really have an initial destination in mind. Oh well, at least it was a soothing fall, and the warmth in the area felt relaxing.

Got bored, so I imagined I'd hit ground soon, which occurred faster than intended. Still too dark to see, so I felt around, my expectations set on feeling some grass and fallen leaves suitable for a forested environment. Instead, I discerned a dusty, chalky stone floor. Further rummaging revealed nothing else.

Then, I overheard the voices of children passing by.

"Hey look," shouted one, "there's a man on the floor there!"

I sensed them gathering around, muttering to each other in curiosity.

"Stay away from there!", I heard a woman yelling nervously. "Keep moving..." They left soon enough. Oh well, nothing interesting.

Anyway, I thought again of the TOMTs, cycling through the possible options. Given my vision problems, I knew the phone call one would be the best bet, and began thinking how I'd go on about that, probably feeling around for a phone or something.

And then, surprisingly enough, I heard something ringing. "That's weird", I thought, "where's that even coming from?" Something about this tone sounded familiar. Upon hearing it further, I identified it as the sound cue for Codec calls in Metal Gear Solid. "Nice, how convenient." By instinct, I tapped my right ear, immediately hearing a voice muffled by static.

"Hello?", I asked.

"Wwzzyyxaeu..." Thought it was more static.

I continue. "Is this another planet?"

"...wwwzzzuuy ayeaz awwz zaaxuuuiiieee...?" This droning went on for a while. As I heard more, I could indeed identify someone trying to communicate, someone with a high pitched tone. But, I learned this voice wasn't hindered at all. It's just how it spoke. Like a robot, one that spoke only in "z's" and vowels. In fact, aside from inciting its gibberish much faster, this thing sounded just as WALL-E. It's buzzing tones hinted curiosity. In time, the noise became louder, as if shouting angrily. After a single whooshing beep, the call gets dropped. Either way, this was very amusing.

Got a little concerned on whether I got the TOTM done right or not, so I decided to call again. This time, I tried visualizing an interface to go along with it, one styled as a black and green display as found in the aforementioned game. What I got was far cruder in comparison, seeming like it was made by an amateur flash artist, but I went with it anyway.

A few rings later, the call went through. From the display, I could indeed see I was speaking with something not of this world. This appeared as a generic Grey, one which, for some reason, wore the Cat in the Hat's... hat. Heh, talk about cliche. Anyway, my own profile in the display was left completely blank.

I then tried talking to it once more. "Hello again."

"Wwwuuueee iizzzxxaazz zzzeeee!", it droned. It was obviously not happy. The thing dropped the call yet again. Oh well, good enough for me.

From there, I resumed in visualizing the environment, this time, through appropriately themed music. Not too sure what I thought of, but I do know it was a cheery video game song. In any case, the environment began warping before my very eyes.

Scene 2 - Chalk Dungeon
The visuals were highly blurred. I was laying in the floor of a long, narrow corridor carved of chalk-white stone. I still maintained lucidiy.

Got up and wandered for around for a while, passing through various small furniture placed within indents. Of particular interest was finding an occasional dais carved in the walls, from which stood a full suit of plate armor. As I crossed these, I had to make a double take, for, from the corner of my eye, it seemed as if they'd somehow moved.

Noticed the music was the same as last time, which clashed with what I saw. I cycled through various other songs, not certain which ones, until I settled with the more appropriate theme for Serigon Caves from Link: Faces of Evil. That's better.

After a bit more travelling, I end up in a small room of the same chalky material, a suit of armor tucked to the left rear corner. I step in to look around, when suddenly, the music changes to some RPG battle theme. Glancing back, I could indeed see the nearby armor was alive after all, slowly pacing after me. I reactively pose myself in a boxing stance.

Unfortunately, the dream collapses immediately afterwards.

Scene 3 - Ah, Crap!
I woke up in bed, where, embarrassingly enough, I found that I soiled my drawers. Wasn't much, but still...

I walk stiffly to the nearest bathroom. To my dismay, I find my dad, and my brother, Xavier, were there working to fix something in the bathtub, with dad laying on the tub while Xavier hands him various tools. The two start arguing in Spanish, speaking on the differences in grammar found in the French and Spanish language, and difficulties found in translating between these. I recall Xavier claiming that Spanish was "too methodical", which seemed to insult dad a bit.

Anyway, I stood around impatient for them to finish, not even thinking to use the other bathroom not too far away.

I then awaken, both relieved (on not actually crapping my pants) and somewhat disappointed (in not realizing what I'd experienced sooner) to find that was just a false awakening.

Spoiler for MEDIA REFERENCES:

Codec:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P82zy333H2c


Link: Faces of Evil - Serigon Caves

I was talking to a man about a car. He said something about getting it from Arr cars instead of ORR cars, then he asked me about the paint and I said something like blue nd white or blue is white. He kept saying red is black or red is white (kept switching up the phrase) The last thing I remember is a phrase along the lines of blue nd white or blue is white.

P.S. A car in relation to my dreams means I have committed myself to some sort of endeaver in my life. White and blue means the ability to convey thoughts, dreams, ideas, new awareness, new beginnings.

I had this one during a morning nap of 50 minutes.
It was a WILD inducted LD. Infact I was observing all the images that come across my mind in that land between the wake state and the sleep. In all the process I tryed to keep the vision of the my mantra (Am I dreaming?) on the background.
At a certain point I felt like a fracture in all my being and suddenly my legs were hovering over my body. I did a reality check, that one of the hands, and then followed my legs in the air.
It was difficult to detach myself from this vision, this situation. Finally I got out of the room and met some OP who didn't seem surprised in seeing me flying around as a baloon. Nothing seemed to be interesting so I passed through the walls (i know how to do that by now) and got out of those places that seemed too constricted to me.
But then my alarm clock went off and I found myself on the bed.

I have to say that this experience was less exiting of the first one, that was a DILD LD.
Maybe the fact that I found myself in my own room wasn't actually so emotional and different from the wake reality and I don't know yet how to change the scenery of the dream world....
Anyway.... I had a prove that everything about LD is true.

So I'm in third person point of view, viewing an old woman who is hook up to a lot of stuff that I assume life support. I think she just died as people bring candles and things. I zone out of this scenario and see superman getting beaten up by someone I don't know. As superman drifts to unconsciousness the dream changes again. Everything reappears and I become more aware that I am dreaming. I open a door since nothing else would appear and see superman and wonderwoman tied up in a chair. They both had their eyes covered up. I make an attempt to untie both of them but some guy punch me from behind. I am no longer lucid. Lucidity Time: 1 minute

I'm laying on my bed, feeling warm and relaxed. I start to get the rocking feeling I associate with dream, but I get a little too enthousiastic and wake up instead of getting into the dream. I don't move and bid my time. When I feel it's strong enough, I throw my dream body out and roll of the bed. I grab the edge to get back up and follow it to the window, in pitch blackness as usual. I get out through the window and walk alongside the wall until I start getting my vision back. As it happen, I snap back in my bed, once again in the dark and half awake.
At this point I take the time to calm down, still not moving, because lucidity in ten seconds intervalls will get tedious. I do the whole throwing my body out again and get out, keeping my hand on the wall and focusing on the texture to keep me grounded. I get my vision slowly, and I'm in the front garden. The car usually parked here is nowhere to be seen and Everything is tinged by the golden light of a very late afternoon. My vision is somewhat blurry, and there is somme kind of dark circle obscuring it. I make the gesture of taking of a pairs of glasses and hear them hitting the ground, but it doesn't really help. It's irking me and that's not good for the dream's stability, so I decide to let it go instead of focussing on it. I walk a little down the road, knowing that I need to find someone, but not remembering who. I extent my hand behind me tentatively, but no-one grabs it. I walk a little more, trying to remember, but I really don't remember and I start to worry that the phone is going to wake me up.
So I just call Eli for a hug


I'm going to need a post-it with "silvery man" written on waiting on my pillow everynight, don't I?

I had a series of short dreams where I became semi Lucid...

I remember trying to get a tattoo as a tribute to my boyfriend. In the dream I had a hard time describing what I wanted, I kept changing details thinking that's what I wanted.

The scenery was winter, cold, snowing and bitter. I remember trying to fly across a frozen pond, thinking that I knew it was a dream and that all I had to do was believe in order to fly properly. I had subconscious doubt which made me falter in my flight but I made it across the pond non the less.

There was also a couple puppies but I don't remember much after that.

I’m in an apartment and there are girls, a woman and a guy. Me and the woman ………sexually part ……… I run out of the apartment and run down stairs when I say to myself "I’m dreaming" and realize that I’m dreaming right now. The floor is cover with blue carpet. I run and jump happy that I’m lucid dreaming right now. I can clearly remember my objectives to do. I say to myself, "do I go back up and continue the sexually part, or find my ex". I decide to find "M"(my ex). There are two ways, the parking or the stairs. I take the stairs. So I run and take the stairs. As I run up the stairs, the dream start fading, I say to myself to not take care. I’m now in a train station and I see "M" sitting down. I go toward her and tell her that she is beautiful and that I’m glad to find her. From far, I see a girl who I know watching us, I make as if I didn’t see her. So I say to "M" if she wants to take a walk with me. She says yes. I grab her hand hard and we start walking away from the train station. We see a kiwi merchant. She tells me to stop but I pull her hand and tell her "no, I just want to spend some time with you".

I forgot to ask her the question.

I haven't dreamt for a few days but last night I finally had a dream. In my dream I was near railroad tracks and I was almost hit by a train whenever this swirling mass knocked me to the ground. Whatever knocked me to safety transformed into the guy that appears in most of my dreams, and before I know whats going on we are holding hands and running theough the misty woods. Before long we stop and an intense makeout session starts. Then I wake up.

P.S. a train symbolizes energy being controlled, in relation to my dream this means positive changes are near.

[URL="http://imgur.com/a/GHDWh"]nr 10 and 11[/URL] (2 a5 sized entries on an a4 sized paper)

nr10 is lucid, nr 11 nonlucid

about nr10: the dream characters were more elaborate than usual and felt almost like real people. at one point i could force a girl (non physically, i have some control over the actions of dcs, if i want them to want me, they will) to want to have sex with me but i didnt because she seemed reluctant initially, because i wouldnt feel good about it. at some point i told a guy that this is a dream and that i am dreaming right now. i asked him if he dreams and he said i was crazy and superstitious (or religious). later on i used powers to light lamps and looked for people to give dream powers so they could be of more help (we were in a survival type situation in a warehouse and had to work together) and i was looking for a responsible person. (this goal was forgotten moments later) i also thought of asking a girl if she could listen to me summarizing my dream so i can remember it better when i wake up and said "hey.. can i ask you something?" and there the dream ended.

pretty cool.


edit: this past week ive actually been getting lucid once a day on average. yes. holy crap thats amazing. yay for nose plug rcs and counting down from 100 thinking "lucid dreaming" on every count. now the next huge step is to learn how to prolong dreams. if i can do that... its happening! its finally happening = D

according to laberge: rubbing and spinning are effective
yell clarity

to bed late (not by choice), ~1am

+ team-based conflict. Sabotage: one guy used an incendiary clicking device to attempt to ignite the underground gas lines via the electrical outlets and blow up several city blocks. "You can't escape" he called out. I ran anyway. Through a door, a guy far stronger than me was pursuing, but I had prepared a small pitch-fork just outside the door and picked it up and stabbed him putting him on the ground, and I called for reinforcements and they beat him up on the ground.

+ (f) returning to the cages, a tiny (female?) dog had been rewarded and entered the cage of my old dog "L". L came along later?

alarm @ 5.5 hrs, very tired, got family member up, back to bed. Alarms are terrible for recall. I had to reach to remember the above.

eventually summoned the will to stop following random thought chains and implement my Back To Sleep Mojo (tm) with the intent of lucid dreams. It worked again

BTS mojo: start with deep breathing. Totally relax and let go of everything: tension, thoughts, all trying and effort. There is a very special "sinking" feeling for a moment at the end of a long exhale when you successfully let go of tension and start to sink deeper. What I do then is try to hold on to that "deep sinking" feeling, including during inhales and exhales. While breathing, I sometimes imagine I'm breathing through my "3rd eye" in the middle of my forehead. Breathing in dream energy and breathing out tension and thoughts. HI may begin during this time. Try not to focus on them, but simply remain lightly aware of them.

+ I'm walking outside in an apartment complex (small, 2 story) in between buildings. It is dark (early morning I think). I hear a sound to the left and look up and see a man through a large sliding glass door [DREAM SIGN], he's doing remodeling in his apartment. He's using a scraper on the glass door, and it's really squeaky and noisy, I think it's rude to be doing that at this early hour, it could bother the neighbors.

The building on the right of me also has a glass wall on the 2nd floor apartment, I know there's a woman in there I'd like to sneak a peek at. I'm staying below the window and trying to remain unseen. (The light comes on?) I sense she's walking around in her robe. I hide under the overhang, and her legs in the reflection of the glass via a building to the left. I think that means she may be able to see me, too.

At one point my wife comes out and I try to hide but she sees me, she's in her bathing suit I guess she's going for a swim/sauna, but she doesn't suspect me.

LD#176 (2/10 goal for LDs for remainder of Feb)
I felt sure I was waking lucid in "my room" in the dark. The room seemed right. I sit up on the side of my bed, and notice vague bits of furniture about, including an alarm clock? [false]. I have a small bit of trouble maneuvering out of bed, but made it OK. Decided to head outside and fly into the night sky and explore the city at night and have fun. Pretty high awareness, and very clear. I get outside and look up at the sky. I think the stars were "beautiful" but in retrospect they were pixelated like computer graphics, and the sky was rather gray not black. The stars were swirling around the sky a bit, interesting. I went to take off flying into the sky and I hear suddenly and unexpectedly a very creepy male voice behind me that startled me and freaked me out a bit, he barked out some statement that I didn't understand. I took off and looked behind me and very very clear and vividly saw two guys on top of the roof of a building. I circled around to go fight them. summoned my lightsaber in to my hand, at first it was the size of a pen with tiny little bumps on each end like a miniature dumbbell from the gym. I reached over with my right hand and "pulled" it which extended it, at first too large, then pushed back a bit and got it to be the perfect size. landed, hit the "on" button expecting awesome sound and visuals (but they were kind of weak like usual), and started fighting. There were several opponents and more coming it seems. Tried force lightning on a 3rd guy who came on me from the right: extended my right arm straight and made a "claw" with my fingers, but managed only a few sparks at best. impaled several guys with the blade at close distance with lunges, one in the chest, one in the face. several good swipes, but just not the vivid blade and effects that I want. There was a bit of resistance to swinging the blade, like swinging a sword in water.
I'm losing the fight, they're getting their attacks in close to me. The main opponent almost got a swing (he had a lightsaber too I think) to land on me, I had to sacrifice my saber to block it and then jumped backwards off of a pier to escape. In the distance in the water some people are standing on a platform.
I climb back up on to the pier a bit away from the fight and look at who's here. It's sort of an open area, looks like a party is going on. Right in front of me, my attention is grabbed right away by a lovely blonde woman in a sexy, revealing, white evening dress. Her hair is in a medium-length braid down her back, and her right side is facing me.

Spoiler for sexy time, explicit:

I approach her and notice as I'm approaching that she's naked underneath her dress, and see that she has a nice patch of blonde public hair. This gives me a "zing" because true blonde pubes are really rare. As I approach her she is now sitting on a bench with her legs slightly open, and I'm kneeling down in front of her. She is looking at me and giving me a playful smirking smile. She is naked now from the waist down and I get a great view of her very substantial bush which is a large triangle of thick, but short-cropped blonde curlies. I tell her "Excuse me, but you have the most beautiful hairy p***y I've ever seen!" She shifts down a bit making her (ahem) fully available to me, and I dive in for oral. It is an exquisite moment: I feel the moist, warm, flesh of her cleft for a few seconds before

the dream fades.

[URL="http://imgur.com/a/rnSaI"]paper 9[/URL]

2 A5-sized entries on 1 A4 page

i also had the nightmare with my mom in which i couldnt tell whether i was dreaming or not. i looked at my phone and did the nose plug but detected nothing strange. i wasnt very clear minded.

Ritual: Yesterday was full of work and stress, conditions that I have previously correlated to vivid dreaming. I worked until going to bed at 2am. Woke at 5am to feed the cat, then again at 6am after a dream that culminated in an experience of intense frustration, vivid enough that I spent around 45 minutes writing it down—an unintended but useful WBTB. Since today will also be very busy I did not do any other lucid practices, however, I had primed myself a little by reading the list of TOTYs last night. Apart from those conditions, the following dream was spontaneous, and I woke from it at around 8:45am.

DILD: I am at my mother's house, but it is unlike any WL house. I am in a long room with high ceilings, very spacious and sparsely furnished, with no modern accoutrements. Maybe it is the medieval look of the interior that reminds me of the TOTYs, and I become lucid. Which would be a good one to do? Fairy would be easier to do outdoors. I could turn into a dragon but then I'd have to destroy everything and I don't want to wreck my mother's house. Phoenix? That would be a good one. I try to remember the details. I can't just summon it directly, I have to burn something, right? I look around the room for something suitable.

On the far end of the room is a table under a shuttered window. The table is covered with a white cloth, and spread across it is an assortment of jewels and precious stones. These look ideal. I select a faceted gem and place it in my left palm. It is small, only about six millimeters across, transparent with cobalt blue striations, like a combination of diamond and sapphire. It is faceted into what I think of as a classic gem shape. [According to online sources, this is simply called a "round" cut.] I walk slowly across the room back toward the couch where my mom is sitting, concentrating on the stone and willing it to catch fire. The stone feels inert in my hand, and I feel that I have chosen the wrong one. From the coloring, this stone is clearly attuned with ice, not fire. I should go back and pick a different one.

I return to the table and find a small stone of matte earthy red color. This is more a mineral than a gem, and it is shaped like a narrow lozenge, almost a centimeter long, pointed at the ends, and only a few millimeters wide in the middle. I begin to will it into flame, but immediately have second thoughts. The stone is so skinny and small, it would probably make a scrawny phoenix. I go back to the table to look for a better one.

I decide to find a gem that could pass for a phoenix egg, examine the options more carefully, and finally come across a good-sized stone around three centimeters across. It is also matte and reddish, but a generous oval in shape, and the top is composed of randomly assorted rounded protrusions, like bubbles. The bottom has been leveled off and already set into a metal frame. I decide that this one is ideal, put it in my left palm, and begin to invoke fire in earnest. Around this time my mom tries to talk to me about doing some household chore but I hush her: "Not now, I'm busy."

The stone resists at first, but I do not let myself doubt my ability to do this. I've summoned fire in my palm before. This time I'm just transmuting it from a substrate. I will a flame to emerge from the stone and soon it does—but I notice that in the process, the stone has transformed into a candle. The candle is larger than the stone, filling my hand. It is a 6cm tall cylinder and is conveniently fitted in a round container. Between the candle and the sides of the container is what looks like a filling of crumpled dry grass.

The flame is burning on the wick in the ordinary way, and I will it to expand and consume the whole candle, turning it into the phoenix I am trying to create. For a moment it burns quietly, but then the whole object transforms again. Briefly I seem to be holding a bundle of smoldering dried grass, around a foot in diameter, until the whole thing explodes and violently flies apart, patches landing in various places around the room. Failure? I'd better check the remains.

I wander around to a couple of the smoking remnants, but see nothing notable. I remember that I need to keep my expectations high, so as I walk toward a third, larger patch, I anticipate finding a baby phoenix. Sure enough, when I prod at the charred dried grass, underneath I discover a tiny, long-necked, bird-like creature! The phoenix has hatched! But it is it skinny and completely limp. What can I do to help? As a creature of fire, I reason, it must need heat. It is probably freezing to death.

I gently pick up the baby bird, which drapes across my hands with no sign of life, and take it to the fireplace. Luckily there is already a good fire burning. There is a kind of metal chain screen separating the fire from a metal grate on the hearth. Sprawled on the grate, soaking up the heat, is a long iguana-like lizard that I had previously noticed on the table when I was selecting jewels. I figure it must be a salamander, with the same need for warmth as my new phoenix. Should I place the phoenix in the fire directly, or on the grate? Since my hypothesis about the wisdom of putting the phoenix in the fire is as yet untested, I decide to lay it on the grate in case I need to remove it quickly.

The experiment goes well. As soon as I lay the baby phoenix next to the fire, its body begins to perk up and fill out. It grows until it resembles a toucan in shape and size, though red in color and with a sleeker bill. Success! But was there more to the task? I can't remember if we were also supposed to fight something, and figure I'd better do that as well as long as I can maintain dreamstate. "Let's go fight something!" I say to the newborn phoenix, and it hops up on my shoulder.

I head past the table with the jewels and open the window in the end wall. The window is a square aperture about three feet on a side, fastened with a single wooden shutter. The shutter is hinged on one side, flush with the wall when closed, and opens inward to the left. This truly resembles a medieval house in that there is no glass in the window, so it is easy to climb up and out. I pause on the sill and bid the phoenix to fly on ahead. Meanwhile, I hang up the long metal hook that I used to open the shutter so that I can grab it when I come in later, then use another device that resembles a hook attached to a wire loop to suspend myself from the sill and ease the drop to the ground, which is far enough below that it requires some precaution. I have the feeling that I have done this many times before.

Once on the ground, I look around for someone or something to fight. I am on a grassy lawn that extends between a number of different buildings. The buildings themselves don't leave a distinct architectural impression—I wish I had taken a closer look. Instead I was scanning the ground between them, but all I see are ordinary people walking about, none of whom seem like suitable opponents. I don't want to be an unprovoked aggressor.

The dream begins to fade. I worry that the abrupt transition to a different space might have unbalanced it, and I immediately take steps to stabilize, falling on my knees and examining the details of the grass while running my hands over it for texture. For a moment the grass turns grey and although I see all the usual plants among it, like clover, everything looks unusually small. But then a voice hails me from above and the dreamstate resumes its integrity: "Do you want to fight?" I promptly agree.

I am facing a man who is accompanied by a creature resembling a muscular, short-haired white dog. The man has a sword, and immediately begins to strike at me. Although I am unarmed, I find that I am able to parry his blows with my hands without too much discomfort. I suspect that I could turn the fight to my advantage if I want, but the whole point of this exercise was to fight in tandem with the phoenix. Where is that bird? "Phoenix? Phoenix!" I call anxiously.

The blade keeps falling, and I keep catching it and pushing it aside, but luckily the dog is hanging back for now. Suddenly to my relief the phoenix swoops in, aiming a stream of fire at the dog. More gouts of flame follow, consuming the man and dog, but they do not go down easily. I watch the phoenix, who has now taken human form, take a blade right through his stomach, angling up toward his chest. It is an unmistakably lethal blow, and I run over to him as he falls. I feel guilty for having put him in this predicament—but recall that for a phoenix, there should be a way to fix this.

Looking around frantically, I am pleased to discover a fireplace in my immediate vicinity. Nevermind the unlikelihood of finding a fireplace outdoors; it is just what I need so I don't question it. I drag the phoenix, currently in the form of a slim Asian boy, over to the hearth and dump him directly onto the flames. I expect the fire to heal him; instead he begins screaming as his skin burns and chars. It is horrifying, but I hold him down as he struggles—he was dying already, this is the only thing that might help. Maybe this is how it is supposed to work. A phoenix has to die to be reborn, right? The human body blackens and burns away. Sure enough, in its place I find a little baby bird, looking much like it did initially but yellow instead of red this time. I wonder if its pale color means it needs to eat. The bird pecks at some morsel of food near the fire and I try to tempt it with something better. "Here, eat a hot one." I pluck an olive-sized piece from a row of snacks baking in the fireplace (I don't feel the heat, just as I didn't feel pain from the sword earlier) and offer it directly. The little bird compliantly swallows the morsel, growing in size and turning red again.

I feel that I have completed the task to satisfaction, so even before I wake up I begin reviewing the details, making sure I commit them to memory. There is a moment when I am back in the same house as the beginning of the dream and ask someone to remind me the name of the guy I fought. "Ziggy Starduster and the Hoarfrost," comes the reply. I note that they definitely said "Starduster," not "Stardust." Since I only hear rather than see the names, I briefly wonder if the dog's name is spelled "Whorefrost" or "Hoarfrost," but decide that the latter is more appropriate on a number of levels.

Context: before going to bed I watched Trancendence. I was wandering whjat would happen if I try to build an AI, what would happen if the AI was able to reproduce, maybe a little mathmatical nonsense to this and the idea of all possible thoughts. Here is how it turned out:

Once in the dream I tried shaping a small unit, like a singele neuron, only difference: I tried to model it so big, that I could see it. I used a „thin tube“ as input and several larger tubes an an output, different thickness, being a higher prabability of conducting something like water poured into it. Concept seemed to work, constructs of larger size were able to solve „simple“ tasks like the TSP pretty well. Problem is, this modelling in RL would be a heck of work, slow, unpractical. Conclusion: I need to model more neural networks of different kinds, maybe one is RL applicable… well so much for this result of my dream.
Second I imagined a world where I supposed about every 6th part oft he soil was usable for constucting the robot I tried to set free. Only task: gather recources, reproduce. Given a slow circle to reproduce, the whole plain I was standing on was destroyed in a few minutes.
Memo to myelf: never ever let a robot build itself from corbon, oxigon or silicon… bad idea.
Next one I tried the Banach-Tarski-paradox. This enables you (in theory) to duplicate points in the 3rd dimension. It actually is quite fun to watch in a LD how it specifically works. Sad thing, this is not possible in RL…
Last one: the idea of the ending for Trancendence. I spend some time working out the details. The end is, (stop reading if you wanna avoid spoilers) yes, we can in the best case destroy an all powerful singularity, but maybe that’s not even the smartest thing to do. Sometimes external things know what’s best for us, better than we ever could. Like in politics, really:
We always cry, as soon as change hppens. Maybe we need to get a little more open minded.
With this I do not mean, we should accept everything, heck no, but we should try to see the good intentions, we should try to see the persons long term motivations, we should see what it has as consequences. For example, though this is arguably my personal püreference: we should see, that some things are unpleasent, but still must be brought through, taxes for example. Great medical applications like stem cells research. Some times you need to take a leap of faith. The world ahead can be a pleasent one… I think.