non-lucid

Nightmare Game
Let's see if I can explain this for you. It's actually very interesting, and I found it very scary - so keep reading!

I was with my Dad, ready to play a videogame, but the way I accessed the save files was very weird.
There was a cylinder of stone, which had small angels carved into it. Below each angel it said the name of the level I was on, and the time and date I had saved at. There was also a statue of a tree (I think), and other carvings on rocks. It was like this huge centrepiece of carved stone, and I could access the save files of the game by interacting with the statues in real life. Very odd, I know. I chose to delete a couple of save files. The statues broke apart and fell into a moat of water around the centrepiece. Again, very strange.

Something about the angels, the save files, made me afraid. It was like I was preparing myself for a journey. A dark descent...
The game was top-down, set in the dungeons of a castle, I believe. There were demons, living dead, all manner of creatures which could drive a man to insanity.
But this was no easy hack and slash adventure game.
It was about creeping through dark corridors, hoping you wouldn't be seen, hoping you wouldn't be killed. It was a game, yet it was real at the same time. Imagine Amnesia from a top-down view, with weapons and more creatures. And then make it real.
This game was terrifying. But you know what? It was addictive. The fear and the adrenaline pushed me and my Dad onwards through blood-stained halls, seemingly empty passages, tombs, catacombs, crypts, and more, slaying horrible enemies all the way.
We played and played for ages, each step we took putting us in more danger.

-recall skip-

My character walked up out of a cellar, into a large modern house. It was eerie, and contrasted with the somewhat medieval setting of the world below. But something was wrong.

It seems that fear manifests itself quite strongly in dreams. It becomes a part of the world - it's not just a feeling any more, it creeps into everything. You can't escape it - everything feels wrong when you're afraid. Anything can turn against you in a dream - nothing is solid, nothing is permanent. An empty room could fill with enemies desperate to tear your heart out and feast on your living body.
This feeling haunts me in every nightmare I have.
I know subconsciously that every room I enter is putting me in more danger. The fear inside my brain can create more horrible things, causing more fear. There is no escape.

There was a % above my character, next to a skull. I knew that if this gauge reached 100%, my character would have some sort of seizure, and demons would manifest in his world, ready to kill him. It was horrible - I was battling my character's own sanity.
I exited the game, but the fear followed me. Exiting the game was pointless. It was real, it was still there. The gauge referred to me - not just my in-game character.
I had to research this medical condition which caused hallucinations - I had something to do with the vascular system (it doesn't exist, but in the dream it did) - and at any moment something could just "pop" and I would be plunged into a world of terror.
I reached for a nearby laptop, but I couldn't find Firefox on the start menu or desktop.

End of dream.
Wake up, then go back to sleep.

No Reflection
This dream wasn't scary, unless you count the fact that I nearly slipped down a huge waterslide (hey, I'm afraid of heights).

I was on some sort of desert fortress. It was a large building, and the architecture was almost alien in design. Think "Sandtrap" from Halo 3.
There was a gravity lift, which would shoot me over to another "arm" of the building a few hundred feet away.
I walked up to the gravity lift, and was flung into the air - but instead of going the full distance, I landed in the sand below, in the middle of the gap. I hit a piece of scrap metal.
Standing up, I walked towards some steps, back onto the strange building (or alien ship, who knows).
I went through a doorway, which lead to a normal dining room - except at the far end, there was the start of two waterslides! As I walked over to get a better look, I felt myself slip - oh no! I was sitting on the precipice of the second slide, feeling the water run underneath me. I struggled upright, and backed away from the edge. My subconscious does everything it can to make me do fall down huge drops, or go on rollercoasters and waterslides. Every time there's a perilous drop, I slip or find myself sliding towards it, almost like I'm being dragged. I think it's because I really don't want it to happen, so it does.
I turned around and faced the rest of the room.
There were some people I didn't recognise inside, now. They told me their names, and I told them mine.
"Yes, we know who you are," a middle aged woman said.
I had the feeling that I was famous or something, except I'd forgotten it.
"You know me? How?" I asked. "What did you see me in? What did I do?"
She mentioned something on TV or the theatre, I can't remember. My Dad appeared at some point, too.
My vision blurred and I felt dizzy, as a result of banging my head against the metal on the desert floor earlier. I walked over to the table, and looked in a big mirror on the wall. I couldn't see myself or my Dad! I had no reflection, but I could see lots of people eating dinner at the table in the mirror. When I looked for real, I saw nobody sitting there.
I said to my Dad, "Dad you have to look at this, quick! We've disappeared or something, just look at the mirror!"
The middle aged woman was still there, so I told her about our problem. She took out a camera to test if it would pick us up, but that seemed to trigger something.

Floating tiki heads started flying through the door, angered for some reason. They looked a bit like this.

I won't let them take me! I thought - even though I wasn't lucid, I managed to project white light at them, and shrouded myself in it. It was a sort of energy, and I used these powers to fight off the tiki heads.
End of dream.

There was a sort of false awakening too, or a "false reality", but it wasn't very exciting and I can't remember it well, so this is all for now!
As always, comments are appreciated.

Im going to this place which is partly underground. The entrance looks like S's house. Its pretty dark outside and theres some lamps next to the door, there is also some snow on the ground. I enter the place and there is H and J and some guys I dont know but they look like "though" guys. We are planning to get drunk and one of the guys starts digging his bag which looks like a bag where you have your sports equipment in like skates and so on, its black. He grabs some bottles of Koskenkorva and Vodka and gives them to me and the other ppl there. P joins in but he doesnt want to drink. I start drinking from the Kossu bottle and H is sitting opposite me and drinking also. I dont want to look at H in the eyes because they are so big. I start to feel this warm feeling and that Im getting drunk. The place where we are is like a locker room and theres an entrance even deeper underground and theres this restaurant. The people in the restaurant start to get pissed of "to those youngsters drinking in the lobby" I start to feel like moving away from that place because of the attention, but the other guys wont move. I go to the restaurant and sit to a tiny table with P and S. Then we start to hear sirens which sound like police sirens, so I ask "They are coming for us right?" I know the police will make me blow on a gauge displaying the possible amount of alcohol in the air exhaled so I grab some soda water from the fridge and start drinking it. It tastes just like soda water. Why Im doing these is that I thought it would make it seem like I wouldnt have drinked so much. I take my wallet and grab 5euros and give it along the soda water bottle to JH and like make him to pay it for me. Then there comes these 2 guys shouting my name down to the restaurant and they say that the police want to test me now. I go up and there are these 2 polices dressed as civilians. They test me with a breathalyzer and first it shows like some 1.5 promilles and then it goes from 15 to 0.5 almost all the numbers between really fast. I start to beg the police not to tell from this to my parents so I say that I just tasted some and can I get away with this If I pass the drunk tests (like walking a straight line etc.) Suddenly we are on a roof of some building and its alot brighter and snowy. I start to walk a straight line and ask "Like this?" and then when I have walked the line the other police grabs me from the hands and is like pushing me. Then he says that I passed the test and they wont tell my parents about the drinking. I thank them alot and show some interest to their job. Then I see this device on the snow and ask that is this their phone, then we realise its some alarm device for the roof. The other polices son comes to him and I jump off from the rooftop to the street. Im walking now on the street and its rush hour cause theres lots of ppl walking. I cross the road and come to this plaza. I see some bums verbally abusing each other and then they become violent and start up a fight. Some of them have knives and some shout "F*ck this it hurts too much" I decide not to go to the plaza.

Im at our living room and I should go to school but theres this some movie coming from the TV and I hear S and J's voices telling how hot the woman in the movie is, so I decide to fap to it. I go to my "computer room" and try to take a desk but theres another desk under it. I have some paper with me. The lighting is a bit weird its same colour as one of the walls in living room.

We are at this boarding house with A and S and we are trying to find an exit from there. We go to the other end of the house and theres F and K in front of the mirror putting their hair. We ask them for the exit and they say theres none here. I go to this room and there comes a guy from our school to the door where you get outside. Hes running from a teacher and first I decide to ignore him but then I open the door and let him in. He thanks me and I say to him that He hasnt ever met me if someone asks.

Im at this laundry room and I hear that someones coming so I hide behind some very thin objects. A hot woman comes in shes brunette and shes like deciding what to wear. I try to be quiet and not to get noticed. Shes in front of a mirror and then she bends over, and Im just looking at her ass and thinking "Holy crap thats an awesome butt". I try to hide my face so that it doesnt glow in its paleness and reveal my hide out. Im wearing a black t-shirt and sweatpants.

Dream Type- Normal

Was at the main shopping street in my town, except it was a varied version (one which I usually visit in dreams) of the street. By this I mean that it contained shops that aren't there in real life, other shops that are but are in different places and the angle of the street (it slopes downwards slightly) is much steeper. I often visit this street in my dreams, I refer to it as AltaJames (in reality the street is called James Street). Found the urge to order a burger at my favorite burger joint, however for some reason the cook wanted me to drive home before I could eat it. Once I had received my burger I instantly found myself outside my house, in the front seat of a car that I had never seen before. This of course did not seem odd to me.

Later in the dream I recall being at a stormy beach that had a long series of train lines running down it. At one point I had to carry something across the lines as a train approached and only just made it to the other side before the train rode past. It was here that I encountered a female friend of mine, someone who in reality had shown an interest in Lucid Dreaming. I proceeded to explain it to her, however I foolishly took no time to realize that I myself was dreaming and could had quickly done a reality check and became Lucid. Upon awakening this fact frustrated me greatly.

I was at some form of social gathering, however I was with a vast range of people - some were friends, some were really old, some were not. We were in what looked like a community hall, and the room was well lit. It was very dark outside. The walls and floors were a light cream colour. I was in the far right corner with my incredibly annoying friend Nick and a middle-aged woman. The woman was very childish for her age, and reminded me of Trixie the dinosaur on Toy Story 3. This was due to her childish nature and high pitched voice. She was fairly short, quite chubby, and had short and rough auburn hair. She was wearing a dark blue, frizzy knitted jumper that was too big for her, and a pair of male blue jeans. She reminded me of the kind of middle ages woman who would be single, living on her own with her cats for company Nick kept talking to her about Nintendo games, and she seemed interested, despite occasionally suggesting she was getting annoyed by him. Suddenly, the two were told they would be room-mates for some form of trip that the group were organizing. Nick was happy with this, and so was she. Nick then went on to explain that He'd be playing his new Pokemon game on his DSi all night, so he might accidentally keep her up. She said this was fine. Nick then told her that once He'd finished, she could borrow it.

02/08/2011
Dream One
"Oneironaut vs. the Dream World"

(Wow. This is the longest entry I have made in a long time. Lol. It's been a while since I have taken melatonin, and I ended up taking 6mg last night, before bed. I also took a batch of multi-vitamins late, which might have played a part in this. I had a ridiculously long lucid, filled with some of the most incredible action I've experienced in a long time. Unfortunately, this dream was so long that I was not able to retain a lot of the detail - even though I stopped myself and tried to remind myself of the past events, along the way. Oh well. I was able to recall all of the encounters I had (I think), but the details of each fight (and the timeline of which fights happened when) are either hazy, or completely gone.)

I was back at my High School. (I had gone to a friend's memorial service, on Saturday, and it was at our old High School. I hadn't been on campus in over 10 years, and we actually got to go inside and take a look around, which was pretty surreal.) I was either in the gym or the cafeteria, and there was something strange going on - though I can't remember what it was. A kid near me was trying to help figure out exactly what was causing these strange occurrences, and he looked up behind me and pointed his finger toward the ceiling, yelling out "Look!!" When I looked up, I saw someone's arm, high upon a window sill, drawing itself back, as if trying to stay out of sight, the rest of the body hidden because of my lower position. This was all too familiar, though, because not only did I recall the last time I saw a mysterious arm tuck itself away from my sight, high above the floor, but the arm was decked out in that same tell-tale green and red sweater. I both became lucid and recognized this recurring character, at the same time. "Come on out here, Kruger!" I called up to him, from below, now fully aware that I was dreaming.

Freddy showed up. Unfortunately, I don't remember much of our conversation or fight. I do remember that at one point, he charged at me, and I did something of an aikido-type of counter, sidestepping and grabbing his arms - using his own momentum to turn him into a front flip and land on his back on a cafeteria table. After a while of fighting, he'd ended up giving up. (That makes twice he's given up against me, so far. Ha!) and I continued on around the school.

I remember even less about the next encounter, but I somehow ended up getting into a brawl with SSj Gohan, from Dragonball Z, still in the school. (I would almost think of this as completely random, but I did have a dream that SSJ Gohan was stalking me, some time ago. I was not lucid at that time, and ended up spending the whole dream running from him.) I remember vague images of this live-action kid with bright blond - almost platinum - hair standing up on his head, and wearing that purple gi he'd gotten from Piccolo. Unfortunately, I don't remember much of the actual fight, but I remember that it had ended up back in the gymnasium. I walked toward the closed gym doors, where Gohan was about to make his final stand. When I stepped toward the doors, prepared for anything, I remembered the Kaiyo-Ken attack, which is one of my favorite things to do while lucid. I flexed my upper body and imagined the energy pushing outward from my center. The dream was very vivid, and I could feel the energy surging through me, small flickers of red waves of light radiating around the edges of my peripheral vision. I could tell that my body was ablaze, but - in retrospect - I wish I would have looked at myself or something, to see how awesome it must have looked. Lol. The last thing I remember about this part was pushing open the doors and walking into the gym to finish the fight. Don't remember how it went, though.

The school scenario continued. Sometime after my fight with Gohan, though, I had lost lucidity. A couple of friends and I were walking on the top floor of the school, and ended up in a wide open hall that felt somewhat like our old school library. (In real life, the school was only two stories tall. In the dream, it was much, much taller.) There was a long row of windows, set over a wall that was probably about 3 ft high, to our immediate right. Seemingly out of nowhere, a Harrier jet hovered into view, its nose slowly waving from one side to the other while pivoting along the hallway. (I was playing CoD before bed, which heavily features Harriers.) It was scoping for us - one of us, at the very least. The moment it zeroed in on us, the fighter jet opened fire. High-caliber bullets came streaming in through the glass, and my group scattered. Being that I was the closest to the wall, I hit the floor and rolled toward it, positioning myself to a seated crouch in a corner, below the window - just this short, thick stone wall between myself and the flying jet outside. I figured that, if I wasn't directly in front of the window, the jet would no longer be able to see and target me. I was wrong, though. Even through the explosive shower of glass particles, I could see the tracer rounds blazing into the building over me, my friends ducking and diving behind any cover they could find for themselves. Then, the train of supersonic shells began to descend toward me. The plane was now gunning for me, even though I thought I was out of harm's way. I lay down on my back, the bullets cutting down through the glass, and then into the top of the stone wall I was hiding behind, busting through the stone barrier as if it wasn't there. All I could do was watch the tracers break apart my hiding spot and rocket across my body, inches above my chest. A feeling of dread washed over me, and all I just hoped to God that the onslaught stopped - that the pilot would become convinced that I wasn't actually behind this disintegrating wall anymore, and cease fire before his bullets cut through me.

I don't know if it was my subconscious will what made it happen, but the line of fire settled on a height just mere inches over my chest. Even though he kept firing, he wasn't cutting down through the wall anymore. His aim just loomed over me like a limbo bar. With these few passing seconds, I had enough time to process my disbelief at what was happening. I realized that I was still dreaming. Immediately, I jumped up to my feet, completely ignoring the machine gun fire, which I must have simply phased through, because I didn't feel a thing. Itching for revenge, I remember jumping out of the shattered window and landing on the plane itself. I'm not sure exactly what I did to it, but the next thing I remember is levitating in the spot where the jet was once hovering, and looking down below me as the jet fell toward the earth, already engulfed in flames. It hit the side of the building once and exploded, the wreckage crashing down to the courtyard floor.

More time passed, and I was now walking through another section of the school, still lucid. I was in an outside, upstairs hallway, walking with some teenage kid (as a visual aid, here is an actual picture of an upstairs hallway that I took, when we visited the school). He was leading me somewhere, but at the time, I didn't know where. The longer we walked down this hallway, the more it seemed to morph. It was changing from the school to something of a dark, medieval castle, the stair-well area that we were coming to turning out to be a catwalk-connected castle tower. We stepped into the dark tower, and guess who showed up to greet us...Ol' Freddy Kruger. Again. He thanked the kid for leading me to him. Apparently, the unknown kid was just sent out to fetch me. Kruger wasn't the least bit happy about our earlier encounter, and he wanted another go-round. This time (as I had done in a previous dream against him), I matched him nail-for-nail, flicking my fingers so that matching razors came out of my fingertips. We had a short clash in the tower, but again, I don't really remember the details of the hand-to-hand combat. The one image I do still have is of stabbing at his face with my fingers/nails, and him bringing up his own hand, threading his fingers between mine and stopping my hand right in front of his face. We fought for a while, though, and it actually ended up spilling off campus. I remember running out to the parking lot with some girl, and we both jumped into an old muscle car. There was a high speed chase where we were either chasing or being chased by a 'ghost car' that was being 'driven' by Freddy (by that I mean he was just controlling the car, but no one was in it). Unfortunately, I don't remember much more about this part than just weaving through traffic with the girl in the passenger seat. I believe that it was sometime around here, that I lost lucidity.

(It's possible that this next part was a separate dream, but I honestly don't know, so I will count it as the same one.)

I was back in the High School. There was a girl walking in front of me, and I remember looking at her back, lost in thought. (I don't know if it was the same girl from before.) For a moment, I had completely forgotten about all of the previous events, but the girl looked back at me and said something to jog my memory. (I wish I could remember what it was.) Whatever it was this girl said, she tipped me off that I might be dreaming. A bit surprised at the possibility, I looked at the wall to my right, where a clock was supposed to be. There was no clock, but there was some kind of schedule which showed times that marked certain events. Using that as my clock, I remembered one specific time on the list; 9:59. I turned away from the schedule and when I looked back, there was no 9:59 anywhere on the list. I had to look carefully, because there were times close to it, but there was no 9:59. I was still dreaming! By this time, I was completely amazed that I had not woken up yet. I ignored the girl and tried to recount all of the events of the dream(s) I had been having - thinking back through my fights with Freddy, Gohan and the Harrier. Even by this time, I didn't remember all the details, but I remembered the basics. The girl stopped and asked me something about why I seemed so distant. I told her that I was in the middle of the most incredible lucid dream, and started exclaiming about all the battles I'd won.

We walked through the 'multi-purpose room' (which was the main room that we entered/exited, when I revisited the school in real life, on Saturday), and out the side doors of the school, toward the parking lot. There was someone walking out behind me, but I didn't notice at first. He was talking shit to me, but I wasn't paying him the least bit attention. Eventually, he said something about the boy that had led me to Freddy Kruger, some time ago. I heard him imply that I had kicked the kid's ass (though I don't remember doing so), and that the kid was his brother. Apparently, this DC wanted to fight me, in his brother's name, but I really wasn't interested. I had half a mind to just keep on walking, and let the guy keep on running his mouth. But then he said something about my ex, MJ. I can't remember exactly what it was he said, but it was something like "Or maybe you'd like to hear about what I did to your girlfriend, 'the Virgo." (MJ is the only Virgo I've dated.) I stopped in my tracks and turned around. I recognized the guy. He was B.S., one of the 'tough dudes' back in HS, that you just didn't fuck with. J.S. was his brother (in waking life, but I didn't recognize the kid from before as J.S.). He chuckled at the fact that I had turned around at MJ's name. He said something like "Ohh....why so defensive? She's not really still your girlfriend, is she?" As he said this, two other guys walked up beside him, putting down their bags as if they were all about to kick my ass. Still completely lucid, I said something like "No...but I'm just getting tired of hearing you talk." I stepped up to him, staring him dead in the eye. I said something like "Well? You are apparently looking for a fight. Go ahead. Come on. Do something." This obviously threw him off his game. He stammered a little bit, looking at his friends. I just egged him on. "Come on," I said, looking down at my wrist, as if there was a watch on it. I warned him that "you're running out of time," knowing that I would be waking up soon. If this guy was going to make a move, I wanted him to do it now.

He did. He and his goons all attacked me at once, and I basically just tore them apart, punching and kicking from person to person, not worrying in the least about their attacks. It was like Jackie Chan taking on a bunch of punks. They didn't stand a chance. I just completely took them apart, criss-crossing between them - moving as fast as I could to attack whomever came in range. By this time, there was a crowd gathering, and one guy came close to me yelling "Yeah! Alright! ...." and I punched him in the mouth, thinking he was one of the attackers. The guy stumbled back, holding his face, and said "WTF?! I was rooting for you!!" Quite comically (and in somewhat traditional Jackie Chan fashion), I apologized to the guy and kept on fighting against the small gang of schoolyard bullies.


(I woke up during the fight. From the way things progressed, I was already amazed at how long the dream had lasted. I knew that I'd taken a lot of melatonin, and was expecting that I had slept most of the day away. But when I looked at the clock, it was only around 7:30am - and I didn't go to sleep until around 4:30am. I had only been asleep for 3 hours! I was absolutely blown away by this, and I jumped out of bed and went over to the computer to jot down my notes. Looking for a chance to induce another lucid dream by WBTB, I then went back to bed and tried to fall back asleep, before I stayed up too long to do so. Thanks to the melatonin, I had no trouble drifting back off.)


Dream Two:
"Fight and Flight"

I don't remember anything about this dream, before becoming lucid. I was with Todd and, having already known I was dreaming, I was flying over the landscape with him right behind me. Since I had a lot of room to work with (and no real plot to pay attention to) I was really pushing my speed, digging in and trying to go faster than I had, the last time I was flying as fast as possible. I had amazing control, and I would dip down toward the patches of water beneath us, changing directions close to the water and having it spray up around me in my wake. I remember just trying to go faster and faster. Every time I would settle on a speed, I would try to push it even further. Flying over what was either an ocean or a marshland, I came toward a patch of trees. The patch was at least 100 yards wide, maybe slightly longer from front to back. For just a moment, I wondered about trying to fly around these trees, but since I was going so fast, I wanted to try something else.

When I came to the watery forest, I imagined myself phasing from left to right, zig-zagging so fast that I became nothing more than a non-local blur moving through the trees. I have never really done this before in a dream, but it worked perfectly. I didn't lose speed at all. I simply came in contact with the forest, and 'whisked' my way through the trees, shifting myself around so fast that it practically felt that I was in more than one position at once. Still flying at a breakneck pace, I exited the forest, looking back behind me and seeing that Todd was still right there on my heels. There was no trouble with gravity; no 'sinking' feeling, when thinking about the fact that I was trying to fly. I was just in total control of my flight, at a level that was very rare for me.

The last thing I remember about this dream was that we had landed on some far-off jungle island. Night had fallen, and there was a bit of a scenario about a voodoo-type tribe treating us like monsters and plotting our demise. We found ourselves in a torch-lit courtyard, standing before a set of enormous doors made of logs. The doors flew open, and an enormous beast charged out at us. It looked almost human, but had elongated arms like a gorilla, and it was very pissed off. Once again (and this is becoming an unfortunate habit), I can't actually remember much of the actual fight. I do know that we ended up winning, because there was a part afterward, when we were talking to some of the indigenous about our victory.

(Even though this dream seemed much shorter, I woke up almost 6 hours afterward, which I would suppose accounts for most of the details of the fight scenario being lost. All in all, though, the entire night's worth of dreams was absolutely amazing.)

08.02.2011

The dungeon to 1800s city. (Non-lucid)

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID

I was in a big room. I was looking for a secret passage or something that would lead me to Australia and get to meet Dreamer. The room was very dark, it was lit with candles and torches with oil burning. The floor and the walls were made of solid stones. The room was very dark, I could barely see.

There was a secret compartment that hace a small statue of Nelson's Head (from The Simpsons) When the compartment opened, I could hear his laugh, "Haaaaaaaa-haaaaaaaaa" I decided to enter this hole and explore, maybe it would lead me to where I wanted to go.

I entered the hole and appeared in a different dungeon. There were a few stone briges and I followed them until I saw light. I exited to a very old school town. I observed how a stoned door closed on my back, making me unable to return from where I came. There were no big buildings and the construction was mainly made out of stone. The walls were painted with pale colors, oranges, pinks and blues. I started to wonder if I could get home. I was in an odd city that I did not know and I knew I was not near home. There were no cars, only vehicles pulled by horses. I was excited to explore the place, but I needed to go home. I had an odd map that looked like:







I was able to understand the map. I walked in a small old school market. They sold mainly produce, but some, had brass figurines and other artifacts. I could hear the voices from other DC announcing their stores.

I started to jump to ceilings in order to get back home. I remember I wanted to meet with Dreamer, so I started looking for her. I had a FA somewhere and then I woke up for real.

My Notes
Non-lucid
Lucid
Awake

I didn't bother with the alarm. I had to wake up early again, and I'd lost track of time and went to bed early.

I remember walking home from school and was surprised to find my dad parked out waiting for me. The weird thing was, even though I was walking home, I was walking toward school.
There was also something else about Ricky Gervais, but I don't remember.

a
Yesterday I was having a dream about some guy interviewing me for a job I didn't want and was not qualified for.
Anyway...
I slipped into a passive observer mode (POM). I have never been able to do anything to mess with a dream in POM. Soon some guy crawled on his hands and knees over to another guy looking at his crotch. I was NOT going to watch this! It is time to end this dream but I was in the POM. Then I started to debate whether I should be aware that this is a dream! This lasted for a few seconds then I thought about the paradox about asking myself in a dream, if I should be aware if this WAS a dream! I woke up thinking WTH was that???

Now I am fully convinced the pressure and trickery to not be aware is in our minds, or at least mine, and thats where the work needs to be done. It's not biological or "natural", it seems like it is some kind of learned dream psychosis. The only other place in our lives where this kind of self imposed amnesia or self deception is used is when there is something too traumatic for us to consciously confront. Even this trama would have to be healed and the "sufferer" ultimately has to confront what they are hiding. Well at least I know who the man behind the curtain is now, it me.

aaaNega Caden aaVs. aaCaden aaaaSolo Round!!!

2/7-8. 12. 630. Academy. Go for testing and a bunch of us took a van. We go next to some soccer fields. See Wallace and stop to talk to him. Derek Xxxx is next to me now. Now we go past the fields to our hotel. All in a bus. Bus driver, big lady, had a gun on her and she had some story and we had her tell us. We stopped at a fire station and talked to the guys

738. Go to Jessica’s house. It’s in Norco. Brett is following me, but then disappears. I pull into her driveway which has a front area and a back area (similar to anther dream?). Driveway is sort of steep at the front. Park truck. See Nate and Jessica on a lower area next door?. Walk around front of truck and looking at the bumper to see what I could do to it. Have a kit on the front. Tires are farther forward, so front looks like \. Look at bumper more. Walk into the house (kind of like a patio like at Josh’s trailer), and walk back out. Some kid walks up to me and says, “Hey, do you have a Nazi flag?” He’s hitting his fist into his hand like he wants to fight. “No, I don’t.” “Well, that’s too bad.” I hold his arms so he can’t get a swing. I ask for some help since a few people are next to us now. Jason VanCleave there too. No one helps

With Dave and Sean. Dusk/ dark. Going somewhere. Walking and see Xxxx leaving the station he volunteers at. I tell Dave and Sean that. Then we run to a building and go inside. Then I dream I have an FA and wake up next to Theresa. I’m up and go to the computer. A popup says I’m lucid, and I become lucid (Dreaming I’m lucid). Go back to bed, then dream of becoming lucid again (A dream of becoming lucid in a dream). Cindy is then there, but it doesn’t look like her. Have “woken up” by this point? Other

I'm playing a very odd game. It starts out as some sort of text-parser where you type in a command and a nondescript character does it. The catch is you have to find commands that won't kill him, since some very innocuous phrases turn out to be dangerous. Then I get an expansion pack for the game, and suddenly it's not a text-parser anymore and the perspective has switched to first-person. The theme and character design is very heavily Assassin's Creed-based, and the action is a mix of that and Sly Cooper, as there's less hiding-in-plain-sight and more acrobatics and just-plain-hiding. Also, more stealing.

The first setting is a town, and I sneak into someone's kitchen. I tiptoe on top of cabinets and refrigerators. The objective is to get a box of butter, because then splotches of butter and sauce will show up everywhere in that town, showing me where I can do extra stealth-acrobatics moves without getting caught (sort of taking the place of sparkles in the Sly games, or the pigeons in AC). Other settings include France and a desert, and the Assassins' Bureau locations are, for some reason, spaceships that provide transportation between the levels. Each time, I have to find the butter-boxes in order to make the new map areas stealth-friendly.

Of course, I keep getting caught, and at some point I end up quitting the game.

I went to bed early the other night. I was trying to do the technique where you lie still and trick your mind that you're asleep. I began to hear deep noises, like bass drums, and saw flashing lights on my eyelids. I got excited and my eyes began to open. I tried calming down, but it was like my breath was coming faster. It scared me a little, but I eventually saw Ronald Reagan telling me to "Tear down that wall!" It was OK, but then I woke up. Tried again, but failed. I nearly was in the dream. Almost....

dream1: I was ice skating on the backyard rink at jess's house. i had my skates on just bought. the ice was a bit tore up in certain places and had parts where it broke off and cliffed to a lower level. i skated around the good areas and stayed clear of the cliffs.

dream2: I was holding a rifle. i was with 1 or maybe 2 other guys. it was somebody else's rifle we were using. we were sighting in a target. I believe one of the guys to be my childhood friend chad b. it was like the rifle was all of ours and i had an extra 350 dollars to spend on a new rifle and i was trying to persuade them that we should spend the 350 to upgrade the gun. get a new scope, etc. i recall saying "why use that current scope when we could use the money to get a sweet scope like this"- and then the dream cut to a view looking thru a new and improved scope lens that could see better, further, more clearly.

dream3: The same group of guys and I were staying at a hotel. Someone came in and told us that "xxx Loewell" left a treasure in our hotel room and we had 20 minutes to find it. We looked all over the hotel room and couldn't find anything. At the very end of the dream, I found a keyhole in the closet on top of the shelf. I tried using a key to open the keyhole and it just opened itself into the next hotel room. something happened and i woke up.

*somewhere in between dreams I had a fa where i was speaking with a guy and i was explaining to him that i need to be aware in my dreams to unfamiliar people because my subconscious is putting them there and they reflect symbols and i should find their meaning by asking them. the person just listened to me.

This is what I've put together from my last dream. In the obstacle course they sent "Anne" in, their secret weapon. I thought she was going to come for me but instead she went for someone else, a girl. I know who she is, but not what her name is or what she looks like, just that she's there. The man who's trying to destroy the world (lets call him Bill) needs her in order to destroy the world. A special forces team was sent into a place that they believed to be her location, checkpoint "Simpson". In there attempt to rescue her they were discovered and pinned down. They call for backup. Only one squad closest to their position. The squad goes into checkpoint "Simpson". Save the DC, save the world. This is the scenario.

Of course this isn't really in serious terms but it's something to do. How I'm going to find her if I don't know what she looks like or what her name is I don't know, I guess I'll just know it's her when I see her.

Last nights dream:

I need a favour. This favour I'm asking the president of the united states for, John F. Kennedy (so at the dinner party they weren't honouring John F. Kennedy, Kennedy is the president). Kennedy will meet us at a certain time. In between then my dad and I go on some dream adventures (ones I can't remember). It's been a long time, me and my dad are being chased by someone. We drive the car right into the place where we're meeting Kennedy. Kennedy is there with his wife, child, and body guards. I think for sure that were late and that JFK's gonna be pissed. But my dad reassures me,

"Look, were right on time."

Wow, we are. It's impossible but were there. We then ask Kennedy for the favour (can't remember what).

At the end of this dream I think I'm talking to my subconscious. I want to ask it why I keep getting up at 4:30 in the morning.

Ironically enough, I wake up at 4:30 in the morning before he can tell me.

I start thinking about checkpoint Simpson, what it looks like. My mind starts to wonder on the subject and I fall into a dream.

I think I'm inside Simpson, I don't know for sure. I look into a room, there's a girl inside, her hair covers her face.

"Excuse me?" I call to her.

Yeah she's a zombie. I close the door. I continue upstairs. Now tons of zombies are upstairs. I start running down stairs. I take a light machine gun from my back and start shooting the zombies coming down stairs. I start seeing real people going down so I hold my fire. Around a dozen people walk down the stairs. I tell them to line up. Suddenly, I notice my gun disappeared. I start looking at them to see if I recognize any of them. I recognize one. A girl I know, Sarah, but she isn't the person I'm looking for. As I try to see if any of them is the girl I'm looking for the zombies start getting back up.

I run for a door to the outside and then I wake up.

08.02.2011

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID

It was electromagnetism test day. When I first entered the test room I laid my bag at my table next to J but A took my seat. I told him to move over and he did, but then I regretted it and lent him one of my rulers. I had two, the one I use for class in real life and another longer one, I lent him the long one.

The teacher explained the exam to us, there were going to be twenty questions but we only had to answer ten. He told us something about a robot program and he was sick and wanted to puke, and so was I for a moment. He also asked us how many of us were sure that we wanted to be physicists in the future or something physics related, but only a few people raised their hands.

When I got the exam I was surprised because there were not any electromagnetism questions and it was all questions like "have you grown accustomed to college yet?"

Had quite a heavy night last night, but my recall was better than usual in those circumstances - maybe I'm improving? Even so, I can only remember fragments of two dreams.

1. My friend Gareth wrapped himself up in clingfilm and went for a bike ride, trying to convince everybody that this was the perfect way to get fit.

2. Unwanted attention from a friend of mine.

I also had a moment where I woke up and just knew I was going to go lucid, I had a huge ringing in my ears which changed in pitch as if it was a siren going past me. I then found myself in the "floaty" SP state which I had encountered before. I had my eyes shut but could see my room around me but was quite over eager. Tried to throw my arms in the air and fly to get the dream going but this actually caused me to move in RL and wake up.

Still, very proud that I made this much progress with alcohol in my system.