lucid

I can't remember much, but I had some false awakenings which made me become lucid, but it caused me to transition through layers of false awakenings and occasionally actually waking up and going back to sleep. In one FA, I knew I was dreaming and got up from my bed, but my dad was also theree and he asked why I'm moving around weirdly. I checked my hand and saw that I had five fingers. If only I remembered me and my dad are in different continents...

Morning of May 23, 2017. Tuesday.

Dream #: 18,418-03. Reading time: 32 sec.



I am near a variation of the Cubitis house in the backyard. However, when I go into the house, I am near our bed at our current address. There is an unknown male present, but I do not see him as imposing.

I had taken four dream journals from the area beyond our backyard, near the railroad tracks (Cubitis). They seem like unlikely composites of my childhood notebook dream journals and my stamp album binders. The Senior Statesman stamp album design is in photographic negative; pink and blue rather than green and copper.

The dream journals belong to four unknown girls. Somehow, they are also mine. I want to check if they synchronize with my main dream journal. (Despite the ambiguity, it seems ordinary. It probably relates to comparing and contrasting my dream journal with Zsuzsanna’s.)

---

2017, 05-19

Search for Asuka

I am in an amusement park with my mom and my brother John. We are waiting in line for a ride, it seems we have been waiting forever. We finally get up to be next and one of the cars pulls up to the platform. There are three seats there, perfect for the three of us. John gets on, then my mom, but when I was going to get on a bear comes from behind me, walking upright like a human, and takes my seat on the ride. My mom says I’ll just have to catch the next one. I’m annoyed that there is a bear taking my seat. The ride leaves and I walk away from it, passing two more bears who are next in line. I wander through the amusement park for a bit to find a ride I will go on by myself. I find a hall of mirrors and I decide to go in there.

As I am walking into the hall of mirrors I see a man waiting at the entrance for me. I immediately recognize the man as MoSh. He asks if I think she is somewhere inside this maze. I ask who. He says Asuka, of course. Isn’t that why we’re here? So we go into the hall of mirrors and start looking around. The first thing I notice is the mirrors don’t reflect either MoSh or me. But they reflect each other in an infinity of mirrors which is quite disoriented. It’s hard to see where the paths are, so we make our way through it like blind people, groping our way with our hands. After making our way through the hall of mirrors for a while we find an exit. The exit leads to a large garden, a beautiful garden. There are many colorful flowers and green bushes and I hear water flowing somewhere nearby. I look around and MoSh wanders off a bit, then he says he sees her. I look in the direction MoSh is looking and I see a Japanese woman in a kimono. It’s Asuka.

MoSh and I head over to see Asuka, there doesn’t appear to be anything wrong with her. But as we are passing a hedge the thing attacks us! I see MoSh has a sword and he cuts the vines reaching for us. I use an Alex Mercer blade arm to cut more vines reaching for me. After a bit of pruning we get to where Asuka is. MoSh asks her where she’s been, she says she’s been here in the garden. MoSh says this isn’t her garden, though. Asuka seems disoriented as if she was on drugs or something. I look at some flowers that Asuka had been tending and getting too close to them makes me feel a bit light headed. Those must be there to keep Asuka drugged so she doesn’t try to leave. I tell Asuka she’ll feel better once she’s back in her own garden. She looks puzzled, but says ok. I focus on Through the Never and on getting to MoSh’s inner world. The portal opens and all three of us go through. Asuka says she feels sleepy and would like to rest. I figure the drug needs to wear off. MoSh takes her to a bedroom to rest, everything around me fades and I wake up.

2017, 05-18

Distracting the Eye of Sauron

I am in a place I don’t recognize, standing on the top of a hill with numerous warriors all decked out in battle armor with swords and spears ready for action. I look around and see a few familiar faces, I see Gandalf, Aragorn, and Boromir around me. Several people step forward and call out the Dark Lord for crimes against Gondor, I go with them. An ugly man comes out through the cracked gate on an even uglier horse. He calls himself the mouth of Sauron and basically starts talking shit about everyone there. I can’t help it… I say he sounds more like the ass of Sauron with all the shit he’s spewing. He looks at me but is silent for a bit as if not sure what to say. He then sees Gandalf and starts talking shit again, presenting Gandalf with Frodo’s gear taken when he was temporarily captured. Pippin jumps out and looks afraid, so I quickly whisper to him that no, the enemy doesn’t have Frodo or Sam, I can’t prove it now, but I know it to be true. He remains silent as Gandalf rejects some very unreasonable demands for the release of the alleged prisoner and takes Frodo’s things, supposedly to remember him by.

The ugly mouth / ass of Sauron turns and rides quickly back to the large black gates as they swing open wide, and hordes of enemies start flooding through the gate and from the surrounding mountains both from in front of and behind us. Our forces are completely surrounded. I quick tell Gandalf that I’m going to drop an Immortal Fire right in the middle of our warriors to force the enemies back, but our people needn’t worry, the fire won’t burn any but those with black hearts. I then make my way to the center of the group, figuring to give our people some breathing room. “And suddenly the unreal silence is broken by a lament... a lament coming up from the deepest, darkest abyss. And from the seven gates of the dark fortress the dead come back to life to face them! This is hell...” Light energy erupts all around me now, getting the attention of those nearest me. Aragorn is telling them my fire won’t burn them, only those with dark hearts. “Immortal fire now rise, light my heart, light my way through the darkness, a guardian of space and time!” The energy explodes out from my position, not touching any of the warriors of Gondor and Rohan, but blasting away at the enemies with the force of an atomic bomb. I put all the energy into it that I can, take out all the enemies I can and definitely attract the attention of the giant red eye of Sauron.

After the Immortal Fire finishes I see there are no longer any enemies very close to our people. There are still plenty of enemies out there, but at least for the moment they seem to be keeping their distance. I am wondering what may be next when I see large shapes flying in the sky, coming our way. Everyone seems to be a bit freaked out as they see there are three dragons heading our way. But our people have nothing to worry about, two of the dragons, a blue one and a red one, attack the enemy armies, and the third dragon, a Blue Eyes White Dragon, swoops down and plucks me up and pikas at me as he sets me on his back. I see the other dragons from up here, and I see one of them has a man on its back, that’s MoSh! I wonder how he came to be here. As if I’d asked the question aloud, Q speaks in my mind and says he went and brought MoSh back since I wasn’t lucid enough to pick him up on the way. By now the enemies are attacking again, and MoSh and I are diving in on dragons to attack them. Then I see the Nazgul on their winged monsters and engage one of them in a dogfight type maneuver in the sky, me on my Blue Eyes White Dragon against him on his ugly demon steed. We dodge past the dark energy attacks he uses and nail him with light energy lightning. I turn in time to see MoSh is facing off against two Nazgul, the dragon he is on blasts one of them to dust and the other dragon, who is riderless, blasts the other one. I am about to engage another Nazgul, but I don’t get a chance before I wake up.

Ritual: The new Twin Peaks started last night, so I watched the usual Sunday shows in their second round and didn't get to bed until after 2am. I woke around 7 or 8 and looked at my iPad a bit, enough to wake up my mind, with the usual vague intention to make this into a WBTB, but the only other mental preparation I did was to remind myself that dreaming involves proprioreception, so I should pay attention to my whole body as I fell back asleep. It was 9am when I woke after the dream, which I felt had lasted only a few minutes.

FA-WILD: During my WBTB, my husband mentioned that he was going to the grocery store this morning, so when I was half-woken by the sound of the garage door, I knew he must have left. This much was evidently a real perception, but right after that, still believing I was half awake, I heard voices. I knew my brother was in his room on the other side of the house, but I couldn't account for the other voices. [DL: My brother lives on the other side of the country, and the room I thought he was in does not exist.] Was he on the phone? But there were several voices, and the sounds of people moving around. Had he invited friends over? Then I recognized one of the voices as that of my maternal grandmother. [DL: She died over twenty years ago.]

Despite the dreamlogic, these observations did actually make me wonder if I was dreaming the voices, not because of the incongruities that would have been obvious to a waking mind, but only because of my conviction that if my husband just left for the store, then no one else (besides my brother) should be in the house so early in the morning. I tested to see if I was getting any dream imagery, and sure enough, when I partially closed my eyes, the four flaps of a manually closed cardboard box appeared superimposed over the rumpled covers of the bed that I had thought I was seeing with my waking eyes. [DL: In retrospect, is it apparent that everything I observed after hearing the garage door was already in dream, so I was mistaken in believing that I had woken up. My mind was half awake, despite the dream logic, which is what led to the confusion about which perceptions were dreamed and which were real.]

I realized that if I was already seeing dream imagery, then if I was careful I could probably "get up" out of bed and into the dream just like I do in WILDs. This was easily done. I crossed the room, an accurate likeness of my bedroom, and opened the window to look outside toward what I understood to be my brother's room, on the second floor above the attached shed. [DL: The shed has no second storey.] The ground was covered with snow, and I did recognize that this was incongruous with the current season. It gave me the idea to do the TOTY that I had attempted a couple times earlier, the sled ride.

The last shot of the final show I watched last night was a woman diving backwards over the edge of a boat to go scuba diving. It made an impression on me because I had only ever dived into water face first, and at the time I had tried to imagine what it would feel like to enter the water that way. Now, as I was about to jump out the window, I decided to do it backwards like a scuba diver. For a moment I felt like I was falling and wondered if I would actually hit the ground, but then the nongravity of dream caught me pleasantly in an inverted arc, and I settled gently to my feet.

I remembered the last few times I had attempted the sled task, and how I had overcomplicated it to the point where I kept waking up before I could finish. This time I decided I'd better just get it done, even if my solutions weren't elegant. So instead of going to the trouble of finding or manifesting the necessary sled and mountaintop, I just asserted these conditions into existence. I'm on a sled, riding down a mountain. As is typical when I "brute force" things in dream, initially it felt like a fiction, but soon I began to feel plausible sensations of sitting on a sled and sliding down the snowy slope. It was far from my best work, but it sufficed.

I was sufficiently familiar with the task that before I had even intended it, my sled slipped through an irregular opening like the mouth of a cave, into a wide dark space. But then I wondered if this was good enough—I hadn't read the terms of the task in ages. Would a cave suffice, or did it have to be a proper hole through the surface of the earth? I couldn't remember, so I decided to play it safe and conjured a perfectly round hole, like the sort of thing you might see in a cartoon, just in front of me on the lower floor of the cave. My sled and I slipped right through, and at this point my interest perked up, because I didn't know what to expect, and had not planned or intended anything past this point.

It was dark down here, and I had no sense of the borders of the space, yet I could see the details nearest me perfectly well in the nonlight of dream. The place felt public and even familiar—familiar as a type rather than a specific location—but I can't think of how to relate it to anything in WL. A "town square" might be the closest analogue, but of course in WL town squares don't tend to be in enormous caverns underground.

I felt my mind shift over into observation mode and began to take deliberate note of the things I saw, but at the same time I felt really hungry and couldn't resist impulsively tasting everything. [WL: I hadn't eaten much for dinner and had even felt hungry again by the time I went to bed, so this was a genuine bleedthrough sensation.]

My sled had disappeared in the transition through the hole, so now I was on foot. The first object that I passed, on my left, was a piece of fabric that had been fashioned into the form of an elephant, about about eighteen inches wide. It was attached to the top of a pole stuck in the ground, elevating it to just above waist height. I pulled the fabric elephant off the pole to give it a closer look as I continued to walk. White was the dominant color, but the details were stitched in brightly-hued threads, red and blue and green. The base fabric had a thick pile, almost fur-like, akin to what you might see on a stuffed animal, but the object overall was flat, lightly padded like a thin quilt. My hunger impelled me to take a big bite, and in my mouth it had the taste and texture of a sort of bland taffy. (Tastes are rarely very distinctive in my dreams.) I dropped it and moved on.

The next object I encountered was also on a waist-high pole, and about the same size as the elephant. This one was made of paper and a bit more three-dimensional—it resembled a large origami fish folded from patterned paper. The taste and texture were even less remarkable, but I was so hungry it felt good to be chewing something.

As I observed with mild amusement the way my hunger was driving me to try to eat things that didn't even resemble food, the rational part of my mind responded that this being a dream, there was no reason I shouldn't try to eat literally anything I could see. I put this to the test, breaking off random bits of any surface I came across and nibbling on them. One thing I remember distinctly was a table. It was a round table covered by a long, dark-hued tablecloth. I think there was a vase of flowers in the center but otherwise it was bare, so I grabbed a hank of the tablecloth and started noshing on that. I was cramming far more in my mouth than I ever would in WL, but I didn't worry since I knew that this stuff had no real substance.

I was still in snacking mode when I came across a white-bearded gentleman in a navy blue blazer. The bronze buttons caught my eye, and without so much as saying hello, much less asking permission, I reached out and twisted off the top button, bringing it to my eyes for a closer look. Tiny convex letters around the top spelled out "Bartholomew," and a small human figure occupied the center of the button. "Saint Bartholomew?" I asked the gentleman from whom I had taken the button, while trying to remember if there was really such a saint or if I was just free associating. [WL: I still wasn't sure so I googled it. Apparently Saint Bartholomew was an apostle, and although I was not consciously aware of that, I suspect the influence of day residue, because in The Leftovers last night several disciples were mentioned, and I've never been able to keep disciples and apostles straight.] The man shook his head, and when I looked again at the button I saw the letters rearrange themselves into the name "Balthus," which seemed to make a bit more sense... in a way that I can't entirely explain. Still hungry, I licked the button. I thought it tasted a bit sour and metallic, a bit like licking a D battery but without the tingle. The bronze button had been darkly tarnished but now gleamed where I had licked it, so I licked it a few more times to polish the highlights. I looked at the letters again and now they read "Ubewiz," a name meant nothing to me, though I thought it sounded vaguely Polish. [DL: I just noticed the symmetry between the verb "polish" and the adjective "Polish," so I suspect dreamlogic lay behind this observation.]

FA: I woke up (so I thought) and immediately fished my dream journal out of the bottom drawer of my bedside table. [WL: This was a realistic detail, because although usually I keep it right on the table next to the bed, for the past few days it has been in the drawer.] I flipped through it and couldn't find a single blank page, but I didn't want to waste any time so I started writing my notes in the margins. I was jotting down keywords: "Bartholomew, Balthus, Ubewiz," read the first line. Then I included brief notes about the fabric elephant and origami fish. I hadn't gotten very far when I woke up again and realized that I had been taking my initial notes in a false awakening and would have to start over, so once again I pulled my journal out of the drawer and wrote—grateful for the blank page this time—"Bartholomew, Balthus, Ubewiz."

2017, 05-18

The Battle for Minas Tirith

I am in a place I don’t recognize, on a ridge overlooking a wide open valley on the other side of which is the city of Minas Tirith. The open valley is crammed full of enemy troops including orcs, evil humans, trolls, Uruk Hai, Worgs, and every other manner of evil thing you can imagine. Several Ring Wraiths are soaring over the armies on their demonic steeds. The enemy army looks like it’s thousands or even tens of thousands strong. I’m not alone on the ridge, however. I am standing among another formidable army. King Theoden is off to my left on a beautiful white horse, Snowmane, so that must mean I am with the riders of Rohan, and I see they are preparing to charge down into the fray. Horns are blowing to signal their arrival, and on Theoden’s signal everyone charges down to battle.

I am being passed by people on horses charging into battle so I form my right arm into an Alex Mercer blade and charge down into the battle as well. There are plenty of enemies out there, and I don’t hesitate to cut into some orcs and a big troll, jumping up on a Uruk Hai’s back to gain enough altitude to cut the troll’s throat. I continue fighting and I lose count of how many enemies I take down when I see a dark shadow over the area. I turn to look and I see Theoden’s horse rear up as one of the Nazgul swoops down on him. It’s the Wraith King! I see the thing push Theoden’s horse over on top of him and then perch on top of it. As it is about to finish off Theoden, another warrior comes in when most everyone else, allies and enemies alike, have been retreating away from the monster. The Wraith King taunts the warrior, saying no one should dare come between a Nazgul and his prey, and no living man can kill him. The warrior announces she is not a man, she is a woman and removes the head of the Wraith King’s hideous steed. The Wraith King is enraged and advances on Eowyn, for surely that is Eowyn. Then a small warrior, no doubt Merry, strikes the Wraith King in the leg which distracts him enough for Eowyn to bury her blade in his head.

The Wraith King falls, now just a pile of empty robes. I see Eowyn and Merry have also collapsed. I go over to Theoden and find he’s alive, Snowmane has rolled off of him. Snowmane is also alive, but barely… which is enough. I focus healing energy on Theoden and on Snowmane, and they are revived. Eomer has come over to see what has happened, he sees Eowyn on the ground. Once healed, Theoden wants to continue fighting. Healing the damage done by the Wraith King would take too long to do in battle, so some men carry Eowyn towards Minas Tirith. I point out Merry also needs help, and guard them as they are taken to the city. I barely get to the city and see them through the gates before everything fades and I wake up.

I had another false awakening this morning that was frustrating. I am lying in bed and I have a sense of falling and know it's going to be a lucid dream. I give in to the feeling and wake up on my bed and make sure I am dreaming by driving my index finger through my palm. I want to get up from bed and explore but I seem to not be able to get up from bed. I try to float while reminding myself that this is my dream and I am in control. I touch the wall to try and make the dream more stable like real life. It doesn't work so I decide I want to enter a different dream. I try to pull the blanket over my face and wait for a different dream scene. Nothing works and I end up waking up after closing my eyes to wait for a different dream scene.

Date of Dream: SUN 21 MAY - 2017



Dream No. 117 - Separated Sections

Dream 117 A - Stack 'Em High (Lucid Dream 7)
I forgot how I became lucid but I knew I was lucid because I was always consciously aware of things. I was in a small storeroom with this large filing cabinet of three levels. On the third level, there was some nest with one egg inside it. I was ambitious about getting the egg out of that nest for some reason. The first thing I did was call for Dreamy WB.

She entered the storeroom very quickly after I called. First, she ended up giving me the biggest hug ever in dream history and I am not joking when I say this. In the dream, I said that hugging her was like hugging a really soft sponge... We hugged for quite a long time. Then she helped me by lifting me up to the nest. It's like she was partially lifting me and still hugging me at the same time. Still, I couldn't reach it. So then Mr. B came in and he lifted Dreamy WB up. So the chain was now Mr. B on the ground, then Dreamy WB, then me who this time, successfully got the egg. I don't remember what happened after that.

Dream 117 B - Demolished Grounds
I came to Killester for a visit and my main objective was to look for WB. As I made my way to the quadrangle area, most of the place looked destroyed like a mini world war 3 had broken out. Additionally, there were these metal wire construction fences blocking off some areas, including the walkway from the year 9 area to the oval. To get over the fence, I once again found myself using the Balloon Mario method based on Super Mario 64 DS. When I got over the two lots of fences, I made my way to the oval. When scanning the oval, there was no WB... Only junior PE classes in action.

So turned back and went to the edge of the quadrangle. When there, I assessed my surroundings again and thought that maybe WB was having English in the library. Usually, there is an accessible staircase next to the art rooms but in the dream, there was not. The only available staircase was the main one where the lift was. So I went back over the fences and then scanned the area where the staircase was... Supposed to be! The main staircase was non existent, at least so I thought. There were remnants of the top half of the staircase in which the bottom half had been broken off like the school had demolition day. I looked to see where there were accessible stairs. I eventually caught sight of the newly placed staircase which does not exist in the waking life Killester.

Leading up to the staircase was this long wooden walkway and in the middle of the walkway, I noticed Mr H conducting a choir. Still, I thought I'd stop by the choir in case WB was in that... But I soon noticed she wasn't. There were a lot of girls and so the space of the walkway was very crowded. Additionally, some strange gravity was always making me fall backwards and almost tip over off the walkway. Eventually, the weird gravity started to affect the girls in the choir as well.

The dream scene then skipped to me talking to my mum in the car. I was saying to her that I was going to stay longer as I realised the year 12 graduation assembly was today. Either I don't remember what happened after that or I woke up.



V Behind The Scenes V

116 A: Why Lucid?
Although Dream No. 116 A followed a non lucid plot, I felt like I was really aware of my surroundings and the things that were happening. When I am non-lucid, my goals appear to be blurred and I sometimes use crazy methods to get them... Like you know what you want but then at the same time, you're not sure how to reach that goal. In a lucid dream, I clearly know what I want my first resort is to call Dreamy WB. It's sad that I don't remember how I entered the lucid state as it would have been good to write the reality check here to prove it to anyone reading... As well as just to basically share insight on how I got lucid, not just that I was lucid. I think I might do a comparison chart below as to what non-lucid dreams feel like, compared to lucid dreams.

Non-Lucid Dreams
1. Summoning Dreamy WB
There are multiple approaches in non-lucid dreams. First, I find myself looking for her
rather than just calling for her. Also, I sometimes my get the real version instead of
the intended dream guide. Although I'm in non-lucid dreams, I can still tell who is who,
even in the slightest personality differences... It doesn't always have to be nice and
nasty. Sometimes, they're both nice but the real one acts more informal and teen like
whereas the dreamy figure acts more motherly like. Basically, she's unpredictable in
non-lucid dreams and sometimes, I can't even get her at all.
2. Interacting With The Environment
Anything can happen in a non-lucid dream. Also, it's like the environment controls me.
I can't really interact with the environment fully, I can only do what it tells me to do. For instance, I know I could have reached WB's place if I wanted to but because it was a
non-lucid dream, I remained lost because I was unable to command an instant change,
rather the plot just flowed as it was going to, all the way until the end of the current REM
cycle.
3. Ambitions
My goals aren't so straight forward. Additionally, I find I may only set a certain task if a
problem arises first. I guess dreams would be meaningless if there wasn't a storyline to
follow along to.
4. Dealing With Problems
In non-lucid dreams, the solution doesn't come to me straight away. Additionally, I may appear scared of confused in front of the enemies I face. Even if I start out strong, I feel
the enemy always finds a way to weaken me before my dream ends. Especially in nightmares, I am completely helpless and cannot even feel my dream guide's energy around anyway.
5. In Summary
The dream tells me what to do. The more violence, the less I can feel energy and instead, I feel rather deserted and lost.

Lucid Dreams
1. Summoning Dreamy WB
This works pretty much all the time! The first thing I do when I realise a lucid state is call specifically for Dreamy WB. Additionally, if there is no response, the lucid state allows me to keep persevering whereas in a non-lucid, I could risk losing focus. In lucid dreams, she always arrives promptly and greatly assists with the task at hand.
2. Interacting With The Environment
I find that I interact better with the environment, having a connection to it rather than being the environment's puppet. I can actually also assess the sensations. For instance, I may not have described Dreamy WB's hug so vividly if I wasn't lucid. Additionally, in Dream No. 93, I knew it was fading, whereas if I was non-lucid, I wouldn't have realised that the dream was exiting.
3. Ambitions
In lucid dreams, I know what I want and am able to stay focused, even if non-lucid aspects of the lucid dream try to set me off course. Most importantly, I find myself having an ambition as soon as I enter lucidity, there is no hesitation.
4. Dealing With Problems
So far in lucid dreams, I haven't encountered any real evil yet. I predict that it would be the same as the above 3 points. I predict Dreamy WB going to the root of the problem rather than me having to go on a quest to get help. Also, I think I may be able to assess the dangers before making a move rather than suffering from a wrong choice, influenced by non-lucid plots.
5. In Summary
I have a higher awareness and I actually know what I want, rather than being lost and confused and just pushed around by a pre-written story plot. Additionally, since Dreamy WB can be summoned from the start, nightmares won't be a lonely, heart attack causing encounter

Lucid

I was lucid somewhere but forget the dream.

Fight

I remember being in the middle of a big fight. I was floating and shooting plasma balls at a sorcerer hooded figure.

Weird work dream

Went to go work at mcdonald's late at night. Had to work at a different store. I wound up at a back door where there was a fence close to a wall. for some reason I wanted to squeeze in between it, but couldn't go through.

Went in and went to a downstairs area.Became lucid randomly. Wanted to stabilize, and found something on the floor and ate it. Tasted terrible but didn't care just trying to focus on senses in the dream. I tried the hand time dilation thing. Didn't get far but into the counting I saw a hand under my hand, then another and another. it fell apart.

FA, in the downstairs area. I found a big room with people sitting on tables. They were in mcdonald's uniform I started telling one kid about the previous dream. He didn't seem to care and just stared at me. I forget what happened after.

Alone

Was in the downstairs place again. There were a couple girls there I had been talking to earlier. They gave me dirty looks for some reason and one invited another guy to her table. Then she stared at me menacingly. I went upstairs and ate my lunch by a fridge and a door leading outside.

Games

Was in a long dream where I was with Data playing some video games. We were on a couch playing something. He said I should bring my xbox system. He seemed like the only sane person in the place I was in. So I went to grab my system and forget what happened after.

Lame work dream.

Another work related dream. I had to work at a different store for the day. I remember the inside being really big.

more HH of Bjork

I'm half asleep an see a woman's face in hypnagogic imagery. It's like she's trying to conceal who she is but not doing a very good job. she has her hand over the bridge of her nose. But I see the eyes and hair that is kind of dyed red. It's obviously Bjork.

Lucid Party

Asuka is leading me out of a bedroom while I'm lucid. she leads me into the dining room where data, and some of our children are in party hats and there's big cake on the table. I want to dilate time and think of a song. I start singing a parody of the ending lambchops song, "song that doesn't end" and try to make the lyrics about dreams, "This is the dream that doesn't end!" But everyone starts singing the lambchops version off time with mine. It throws me off. and for some reason it wakes me up.

Invasion

Can't remember much but a bunch of dimensional portals open in my house. They are energetic circles with red edges and people run through them. Pretty sure it's remote viewers. I am hiding behind a couch when Dr. Strange emerges from a portal and claims he's there to help. He's not really fighting, but he pulls out something like a bingo dabber then pulls out a vial with purplish liquid and pours it on the dabber. he hands me one and says that all we have to do is mark the invaders with these things and the invaders will be immediately transported outside.

We go around the house marking everyone until they are gone. I go through the house and notice that Asuka, Data and the kids are missing. I have no idea what to do about it when my recall fades.

Different house.

I'm in a different house. I go into a party room where some people and my cousin are. I tell my cousin about the dream but he get's annoyed. I find a red chapstick cylinder and tell him we were using something like these to get rid of the bad guys. Him and the other people get annoyed at me. I also spot a guy that seems familiar. I think he's Nomad's friend. I leave the room and briefly become lucid. A part of the house has a bar with stools on it. people are sitting in them.

Fa, get out of bed and RC, Still in the strange house. I walk through the hallway and enter the bar area. I spot L from work sporting a cowgirl outfit. I tell her it's a dream. She looks at her hand briefly and says, "So it is. Thanks for telling me." I keep walking. I walk through some more hallways not knowing what to do.

I Try Walm's time dilation method. I jump at the count of 40 to keep the dream bubble from collapsing. The dream snapped back and stabilized. I walked into the other room with the people. I began to feel tired right away. I found a couch and fell asleep on it.

Perceptual Barriers

I'm walking outside my supposed house at night time. Don't remember leaving the house and become lucid. I'm on a residential street at night time. I flap my arms and fly up. I see the house I was supposed to have come from. It doesn't look like grove street. I see a big grassy field by it and some trees. I yell, "To my inner world house!" and then the house vanishes before my eyes. I just see a highway road between grassy fields. I start flying down the road. Everything seems normal. I don't know where to go next So I decide to troll and old flame Jamie. I think of her and where her dream might be. As I do this I notice a large overpass on the road. Okay maybe she dreams at a farm type home like she grew up in. So, I fly where the overpass road goes but instead encounter another overpass. I decide to fly under it, but when I do thousands of overpasses materialize everywhere. I fly under another one and find a concrete wall with lots of road lights. I turn around and find myself blocked by another wall. Now I am trapped. The dream ends.


Jesus

I am flying over a desert road during the daytime. I see Raven in a crowd of people and she doesn't have her hood on. "There he is!" She declares and points a bunch of people gasp. I look to where she's pointing and all I see is a sandy and rocky cliff with a cave in the middle. I look to the top of the cliff and see Jesus standing on it in a "see me in all my glory" pose. I go to fly up to him but I wake up.

Almost all my lucid dreams start as false awakenings. This morning I had another uneventful lucid dream. I false awake on my bed and I feel weird. The whole thing feels not real. So I try to put up my hands to do a reality check but I don't see my hands when I hold them up. That's when Inknoe that it's a dream. I find that I am naked and try to conjure a dream figure to have sex with, but it doesn't work. I can't even see my own hands, even though I feel them rubbing together to try and stabilize the dream and have more control. I can feel the dream disintegrating so I try to close my dream eyes and will a new dream outside my bedroom but I awake instead.

This dream is from a little while ago. People tend to enjoy my really absurd dreams so...

We are coordinating a D-Day style invasion to overthrow the pumpkin king's kingdom. He is fortified on a small island about 10 miles long by 100 miles wide somewhere in the Mediterranean sea. The plan is to sweep across the island from the far end of the capital city and overwhelm the enemy with brute force. I do believe I pointed out the questionable military strategy in saying that it would be better to land nearer the capital and go straight for what was obviously the heart of their command and where their leader was.

Regardless I am overruled and we begin the landing on the beach. The main landing force consists of me, the Scotsman from Samurai Jack and several ships full of overly-muscular vikings. The beach is defended by battalions of Battle Droids from Star Wars and them being used had something to do with them camouflaging with the tan color of the sandy beach. I for whatever reason have gone into battle unarmed and pick up one of their guns.

It seems as though our landing is proceeding well when the sun is eclipsed by a giant Jack-O-Lantern and it begins raining down pumpkins. The pumpkins land on the heads of the vikings and mind-control them turning them into slaves of the pumpkin king. This causes infighting amongst our forces but me and the Scotsman press on. We climb a cliff at and get into an area with some forest and farmland. I see a compound with a pagoda that has blue roofs and I falsely remember that there are blue ninjas stationed in there. Manei appears and I tell her about how I once trained with them but I left because I didn't agree with their moral code. She suggests that we charge in anyway and the Scotsman agrees with her, but then disappears from the scene avoiding the consequences of her suggestion.

We get inside the compound and there are more battle droids along with Sugilite from Steven Universe. We start fighting and the blue ninjas come out and start throwing bombs at us.



I think the Scotsman fled. The ninjas it turned out were mostly small children and a few female mentors who recognized me and were friendly to me because I had in the past left them. I noticed that their morals had changed.

The dream shifted to something to do with training the blue ninjas to use a zipline and there was this park ranger woman involved.

Oddly I'm not sure what exactly made me lucid in this dream. It just happened and I had total control of my actions in the dream environment. To start out with I was in Dubai swimming in the gulf. The water was crystal clear and I was collecting coins from the gulf floor. The coins were of all different Currencies including my native Canada. It was easy for me to find all sorts of things on the floor of the gulf because it was a very hard surface, sort of like the salt flats or even the Black Rock Desert in Nevada. I wasn't alone as I remember picking up coins nearby other people's feet. From there I went to a dark blue room with a high ceiling. It had a large window on one side and a staircase in it. I decided that in this room I was going to try out flying to see if I could figure it out. I hadn't tried that in my last LD. I easily flew around the room and instantly experienced the joy and euphoria that many LDers have described. Knowing from others that this feeling often kills the LD I returned to the ground to focus on remaining lucid for a moment and succeeded. I decided to make my next task flying through a wall. I remembered that many other lucid dreamers have reported difficulty in achieving things like this due to perception so before I started I thought to myself that just before I got to the wall I'd close my eyes so that I couldn't see the wall. I jumped into the air to start flying again and headed toward the wall with a little speed behind me. Just as I approached the wall I closed my eyes and went through it. Once again euphoria ran through me and I struggled to maintain my lucidity. Unfortunately I don't remember much of my dream after that but I am happy that I managed to complete 2 major tasks in my LD in addition to controlling my lucidity.

Morning of May 17, 2017. Wednesday.



I was experimenting with a different type of induction last night. Needless to say, it had a very odd influence. Only the last scene is partly based on a conscious script.

---

In the first scene, I am in bed in our present home but not lucid. I am aware that we have a 3D printer in the lounge room. Zsuzsanna tells me about making something with it and I assume she means something like a figurine, perhaps a cat or teddy bear knickknack.

Instead, she brings over what she made and it turns out to be a section of teal-colored embossed cardboard of about A3 size. It is somewhat shiny and the design is made up of equidistant curled leaves with S-shaped lines connecting them.

The personified preconscious appears, but curiously does not dominate the scene or initiate any familiar waking symbolism. He seems to be wearing some sort of large orthodontic headgear, like a metal frame slightly higher than his head and sitting on his shoulders. We sit facing each other. I see “him” as some sort of unusual “partner” who may actually be female. I vaguely think of my mother (though my father as well for a short time), especially as the setting seems to be a version of the northeast corner of the Cubitis living room - but I seem to think we are the same age even though “he” seems to be around eighty years old. I try to project deep love into his (her?) eyes. We might even have been married for fifty years or so. The eyes knowingly gaze back at me and I sense both weariness and incredible persistence despite the state of their health. I try to be sincere in my love, regardless of how bizarre this entity appears. I want to make sure that this entity is aware of my love for them. I keep staring at “him” and slowly, it seems that she is going to go shopping.

I stand up and look down at her as she is still sitting and facing me. The inside of her head is mostly hollow, somewhat like a container. It seems very strange to me that there is no discernible brain. In fact, the back of her head is mostly missing. When she looks up at me, a lot of white and red fluid flows from the back of her head (over the lower edge of the open space) onto the floor. I am puzzled as to whether this could be problematic and whether it relates to some sort of left-over brain energy. I tell her of this but she seems slightly annoyed over my concern for her and gets up to go shopping. At this point, the area seems to be somewhat like the second floor of the King Street boarding house, the second room back from the front (north) of the mansion. However, it turns back into the Cubitis living room in the next scene.

I am in the semidarkness now but a doorway is discernible from where some light is coming through. It is a bit east of where the hidden door was in reality to the room my father built (which blended in perfectly with the knotty pine wall as it was the same piece from the wall).

I go over to it and look out and see that it seems to be late morning. There is a slight lucidity, which begins to grow. I absentmindedly create several random dream characters that walk about in the yard between the orange grove and the carport. Despite doing this, I am not fully lucid (and still consider whether I am dreaming or not). I feel slightly annoyed that the doorway does not seem wide enough to suit me (even though it is). I use my right hand and arm to actually move the entire right door frame so that it slides back like a sliding door (even though it is not a sliding door). (Despite my age, I do not presently recall doing this specific act before in a dream, as potential re-induction is usually only based on opening a door, not causing the doorway and wall to change).

I walk over and sit on the ground and have a younger version of Zsuzsanna stand over me and we soon indulge in lovemaking. An unknown young Asian male, in some sort of Darth Vader costume (though without the mask) stands too close to us for a time. I push him away, though not making him fall over. There is a soft awakening, but quite different than the blissful one of one of my dreams from yesterday.

---

This is apparently the first time that re-induction was subliminally initiated by the “brains” of the preconscious persona spilling out of the back of “his” head onto the floor. Whatever next. (This level of subliminal control over the transpersonal is amazing, I think.) At least it delayed my waking transition for about ten minutes.

---

2017, 05-16

The Madness of Denethor

I am walking on the streets of a city straight out of a fantasy game. The roads are long and curving, running between buildings of stone. There is a lot of commotion going on around me, and no one seems to be paying any attention to the fact I’m there. I walk along the road for a bit to try to find out what is going on here. I hear the sounds of a battle from the outside of the walls and I am thinking I should go there and do whatever I can to help out. I am about to go when someone comes up calling my name. It’s a hobbit, it’s Pippin! He says he’s looking for Gandalf, but maybe I can help… he says the Lord Denethor has taken leave of his senses and plans to burn himself and Faramir in the houses of the dead! I say I will help him, but as we go I ask what this is about Faramir, because last time I saw Faramir he was fine. Pippin says Faramir went out to battle but was brought back because he’d been struck down with a poison arrow, but he’s not dead yet and maybe can still be saved if Denethor would listen to reason. He says Denethor is somehow convinced Boromir has fallen in battle, and when Faramir was brought back wounded he seemed to lose it!

As Pippin and I make our way to the top of Minas Tirith and to the houses of the dead I see a lot of people look like giving up. I focus on the song Not Gonna Die by Skillet to try to give them positive energy and hope. “No, not gonna die tonight! We're gonna stand and fight forever! Don’t close your eyes… No, not gonna die tonight! We're gonna fight for us together! No, we’re not gonna die tonight!” We get to the door to the Steward House and find Beregond holding the door against other soldiers who seek to pass with torches. Pippen looks disheartened. He says he should have gotten Gandalf, no offense to me, but they won’t listen to just anyone. I don’t heed that, I just go over to the group. One of the soldiers trying to get in says they must do Denethor’s bidding. I comment that I thought they were supposed to protect the Lord Denethor… he immediately says they are! I tell him now the Lord Denethor is sick, and he needs to be protected from himself most of all. But I have the cure, just let me pass. Beregond steps aside and lets me in.

Inside I find Denethor and Faramir lying on a stone table with wood stacked around them. He looks up when he hears someone enter. I tell him this will stop now. He says no, Boromir is dead, he has seen it, Faramir is dying and already burning, all will burn… why wait? He stands and says he must do everything himself and walks towards the door. I block his path, using the song Not Gonna Die by Skillet. “Don’t you give up on me! You’re everything they need! This is how it feels when you take your life back, this is how it feels when you fight back!” A pillar of light energy erupts around Denethor, shining around and through him. “No, not gonna die tonight! We’re gonna stand and fight forever! Don’t close your eyes… No, not gonna die tonight! We're gonna fight for us together! No, we’re not gonna die tonight! Not gonna die! (Denethor: Not gonna die…) Not gonna die! (Denethor: Not gonna die!) Not gonna die tonight!” Shining with light energy Denethor says he’s not going to die, he’s going to fight! He tells the guards bringing torches that he now bids them follow him into battle and to victory! I go over to check on Faramir and find he is burning up with fever but definitely still alive. He should be in the Houses of Healing, not of the dead. I see Denethor is still there, he hasn’t gone off to battle just yet. He says he can’t leave his son… I tell him his son needs rest in the Houses of Healing, there’s nothing more Denethor can do for him right now. The men who had brought torches to Denethor now help carry the unconscious Faramir back to the Houses of Healing. Denethor is definitely ready to go fight now, he leads the others off to the battle. I think I should also go help, but everything fades to black and I wake up.