memorable

Approaching the Void [Trip Report]
Salvia divinorum
Date: August 10th, 2012

Dose:
T+0:00: 1 hit, smoked, Salvia divinorum (100 mg extract)

Last night, after my parents went to bed, I decided to get out the salvia I'd been holding on to for a while now. The extract I have is standardized to contain 100 mg of salvinorin A per gram, and if you know anything about salvinorin A then you'll know that's a lot! I wanted to be cautious as it had been at least a year and a half (if not more) since the last time I smoked salvia or really did anything like it, so I loaded a very small amount of it into one of my bongs that I've found to mask the taste and (usually) harshness of just about anything very well. This is significant, because salvia tastes pretty nasty and you often need big hits to get appreciable effects out of it. After filling it with water and preparing myself, I grabbed my torch lighter and took it all in one inhale.

I've read many reports of people smoking salvia and saying they always get a slow come-up, or they gets lots of psychedelic-like visuals over reality. While salvia has given me those things before, the first time in a session always hits me like a train with no warning whatsoever, and is nothing but pure dissociative ego loss. I was sitting upright on my bed after I put the bong down, and by the time I let out the hit I was already slipping away. My first thought, which I actually voiced, was "I remember this now." I think I at least mostly understood that when I said it. There was this feeling of approaching the void that salvia always gives me, like I was about to be unplugged from reality. Of course, higher doses actually put you in the void... but that's another story. I wasn't really sure whether or not I was hallucinating at the time, but I do recall that the left door to my room closet and the front-right corner of the bed (from my perspective) had now taken on distinctly humanoid personae, and I spent the rest of the trip talking half to them and half to no one in particular. I felt that they were trying to explain the situation to me, and I responded "Oh, I guess I should wait my turn. I'm supposed to just lie down like this?", after which I knelt down forward on to the bed, not actually fully changing from my sitting position. Immediately after I shot back up and asked "Wait, I'm in control of this, right?" This was a meaningless question, my ego's last attempt to save itself. At the time I wouldn't even have been able to tell you who I was. I felt (mistakenly) affirmed that I was indeed in control, and I so I got back down and rested the side of my face on the bed. I believe I was just waiting for the trip to start (a strange sensation I often get on low doses of salvia), but then shortly afterward cognition started returning to me and I realized that it was already ending. I got up and had an increased amount of energy while walking around, and I couldn't help giving in to the strange feeling of gravity constantly pulling me to the left and ended up twirling around a bit. Shortly thereafter, I returned to full sobriety.

This trip was weak but significant because it reminded me of something that I used to know, but that had been lost to hazy memories and too much drug use: With salvia, you either go for broke or you go home. Like I said, my first time in the session is always just an experience with the void, and afterwards I tend to get more powerful sensory hallucinations. I wanted to see if I could work around that by starting small, but I forgot that not experiencing that feeling all the way just makes me not want to do it again because it feels like I'm still going to have to break through before I get to anything worthwhile, so I might as well get the discomfort out of the way in the beginning. I won't be forgetting next time.

8-10-2012
It was a fitful night of sleep but a very productive one.

Lucidity: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 over most of dream
Vividness: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
D1 First Job
There was a lot of chaotic dream imagery going on in my childhood home. By the end of it, I remember a replay of the day I went off to my first real job. It didn’t really happen like the dream, this was as if it was being reacted again. From what little I remember of the day, this dream’s reenactment had a lot more upbeat-ness to it than the real event. There were other people there as well that were not there in real life but the real participants didn’t interact with them almost as if they were extras just there to fill in the background. The overall feeling was that my mom and I were so glad that I was finally going off to a real job; we were almost giddy with happiness. I’ve been working since I was 16 and was never giddy to start any job.

Notes: I see this as my subconscious putting on a play on this subject. My subconscious’ retelling of the event is an interesting take and one that makes me focus on my own possibly dower mindset and questioning the amount I worry. I guess that time should have been a giddy one being as big as it was but why it wasn’t is now something to think about.

Awake, I tossed off the covers I was way too hot.

Lucidity: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 over most of dream
Vividness: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
D2 Necromancing
Again, a lot of chaotic dream happenstances going on in dry outside “scrub” areas.
I am flying around a lot in a California area. I see a nice California suburb and a nice house on a hilly street and fly in only to see the family right there behind the door and they are up to something. They are all (father/mother/20+son/16+daughter) going to rollerblade out the front door, down the street and down a very very steep street to the bottom of the hilly area where a train track was; it looked deadly but they were very happy and getting ready to go.

As I looked down where they would go my attention followed and I was now looking at another typical California house but not in a comfortable suburb and more on its own and with large succulents growing in the front yard made of rocks and sand. This house had a retention pond next to it filled with green water. There was a road in front of the house and in the road was a dead cat with dried blood and body fluids staining the road.
Thinking about the cat gave me a higher level of lucidity and I commanded, “back to life and all [internal] parts back the way they were” and I made a gesture with my hand to push life energy out toward and into it. Nothing happened. Still I sat waiting. Then it moved, the mound of fur got up off the blood stained area and I could see the cat’s face and its legs clearly. It staggered slightly as if it had woken from anesthesia or something, down toward the retention pond where it took a good drink. Afterward the reanimated cat walked off to my left toward the house still groggy but seemingly perfectly fine. I was happy that I had found a new dream power.

While awake I pulled up the covers being way too cold. I tried to remember the alive cat.

Lucidity: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 over most of dream
Vividness: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
D3 Father in the lot
There was more chaotic activity and I flew around but I came to a vacant lot that seemed to be somewhere in a central North Carolina area with that red soil. For some reason I was looking for a link to the real physical world from here in the dream world and I thought I could find it here. I looked over the lot, there were a lot of people here milling around and I asked them but they had no idea what I was talking about. I circled the lot from the road front to the back and then back up to the road front finding nothing.
I was pretty lucid at this point and noticed dreamers popping into this area either from other dreams or from just falling asleep, it was an interesting area, especially for a weeded empty lot.
Then someone popped in that looked like my father when he was in his 20’s. I was a bit shocked thinking if that was really him. He stood there looking off into the distance smoking a cigarette with a lot of attitude like they used to in those old movies. I fully realized he could look however he felt, this is the dream world. I walked past him looking. Then he turned to me, I saw it really was him and we both hugged. Then I said “So, Welcome to North Carolina” and as I put my hands out encompassing the dry dirty red soiled vacant lot and street, a boy popped in right to my right with a look of complete surprise. I was annoyed with this dreamer getting in my way and pushed him out of my way with my arm. In hindsight I remember this boy back from a dream I had of looking in a mirror and I was he, a towheaded 10-year-old chubby white boy with a crew cut. I ignored the boy and walked back to the back of the lot with my father following, he was more concerned with how he felt than anything anyone else was doing. I asked a dreamer that looked like he knew something where this was but he just looked at me for a second then looked back at the rusted stove he was wresting with, with some other guys.

I wandered around and found my way inside a department store inside an open-air mall. I was still trying to find a connection between here in the dream world and the physical world and was very aware of the dreaming world’s rules. While wandering around this place I rhetorically asked a three foot tall impressionistic statue of a T-Rex “where is this place” and it started to come to life, which shocked me! This small yellow metal impression of a T-Rex had been given some of my life by me asking it something, by my giving it my attention and this I felt sorry for since it was barely a T-Rex or anything, it was bad art that would have a life like that so I foolishly as a reflex said to it “oh sorry” which only served to give it more life! It then jumped off the shelf it was on and down to the floor very alive and becoming more so. It looked up at me like it was speaking but I heard nothing. This was uncomfortable and felt sorry for it so I walked past it to take my attention from it so it could go wherever such unintended creations went.

I saw a sales girl behind the makeup counter and asked her my now constant question but more pointedly so that she knew what I was talking about, “where is a point of reference between the physical world and this one?” She looked at me with a sarcastic look of “are you nuts?”
Then I see one of those cash register laser guns red lights and think that maybe the point of a common link between the two worlds is not a thing but an energy, maybe the photons can be that link.

I woke up and was still too cold and now ached too, I felt like I had been on my back for hours.

7-31-2012
My goal of controlling the theme of the dream was surprisingly easy. Getting into a feeling that I expect the dreams to come to be in has been so easy even that it is now hard not to do. This has given me a lot of control over the dream world even if I am nowhere near lucid. With new power there are new problems namely what controls the controller. I control the theme of the dream but those feelings I use to control the dreams sometimes come from the night’s influential dreams and not what I wanted. This has given me whole nights of dreams with all the same feel to them; this is actually kind of tiring and boring. I need to work on creating feelings independent of any influences upon me.

Lucidity: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
Vividness: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
D1 Enchanted cottage

I was wandering around an elementary school wondering why I was there and what I was supposed to do. Eventually I got fed up and found the exit. Just before the doors I stood looking around to see if there was anything I could do. I didn't see anything worth doing just kids walking around and administrators directing the kid’s traffic, so I decided to teleport (tp) somewhere. I thought it would be strange for people to see me tp so I walked outside to look for a secluded spot to tp in.
Outside I saw an ornate manhole cover and thought that would be a good spot to tp on. Standing on it though opened up a passage to another dream world, an enchanted forest. Within arm's reach was a large heavy old dark wooden door with ornate patterns similar to the manhole cover but more so. Entering I saw it was like a cottage/club house with 2 young twenty-something women sitting on the floor. I went over to them and saw they were rolling dice and small bones and other things on the circular rug on the floor. I walked onto the rug with them and they were totally accepting of my presence there so I moved some of the clutter away to make room to sit down with them.

Lucidity: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 over most of dream
Vividness: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
D2 Phone Call from Subconscious
I'm wandering around another elementary school wondering why I'm there and what I'm supposed to be doing. I look for the exit a lot sooner this time. Outside I think about finding my car but I can't see all of them from the entrance so I fly up to get an overview. Looking down at all the similar looking cars I realise this task is futile and so is my flying here. Slowly I descend. Apparently the school is on beach land and the school is surounded by that pine shrubbery which I then descend into. I feel the hurts of lowwering into this scrub but the pain is not painful. I say "That's one of the perils of flying, landing" as I walk out of the scrub area.
One of the librarian types I saw inside the school is standing there telling me she had something for me to do inside if I was up to it. I said I was and followed her back to the school but just before I got inside I heard a phone ringing. I stopped and checked my pocket and there was a phone unlike my real phone, I was surprised. Pulling it out I realized it was not mine at all but it was still ringing so I opened it. It had tiny instruction card adhered to it and those clear fake display stickers that are on new phones, it was brand new. Curious I said my "hello" into the phone in a unsure high-pitched voice. "Are you a kid?" I heard the unknown caller say and replied with my name but I heard nothing so I spoke again and louder. I did this a few more times till I was yelling into the phone hoping the person on the other side could hear me. By now I had walked behind the woman into the library and went over to her at a table where she was making something with construction papers of different colors.

I haven't updated my journal in a while. The following dream happened this morning on the 10th August.

It was early in the day, and as it turns out, a French citizen who Patrick Geryl, a 2012 survivalist partnered up with, was going off to Israel.

Friday morning. I'm browsing through the Barometer Bob show. It turns out that the host was ill the previous night, and so one viewer comments on the Stormchat group on Facebook, "I wasn't planning on this".

Well, I'm back at my high school now. Apparently this was a school day in the middle of summer, and I'm talking to this girl about something I saw on twitter the other day.

"Say, did you hear about that article?"

"What article?" she says, apparently full of interest.

"That one about the fact that apparently, psychiatrists will suspect that you're a psychopath if you don't have a Facebook account!"

"Really? That's pretty funny!"

Now, I don't know what it was about this particular conversation. Maybe it's the fact that I never talked to her much, or that she was originally planning on majoring in psychology, or even the school she's going to. But something about the talk makes me wonder whether she really liked me. Whatever it was, she looked awfully beautiful that morning.

FOSSIL FOUND IN ORDOVICIAN ROCK

Somewhere around this time there's a discovery made of a large vertebrate fossil near Udora, Ontario, about 30 km NE or ENE of a town called Newmarket. We find the specimen neatly preserved in igneous rock.

This doesn't make any sense. Much of Southern Ontario was covered by seawater during the Ordovician, meaning that nearly all the rock would be limestone, not volcanic. And there weren't a lot of vertebrates to speak of.

I'm compelled to write a fairly comprehensive Wikipedia article, and it turns out to be quite long as well.

Back in Israel, I'm visiting a special agency website. As it turns out, it's offering a journalism job to "entrepreneurial Facebook users", whatever that meant.

Somehow, I'm back at my high school again, attending a graduation convocation for band students in the music room who will be leaving for the year. Someone gives out between three and ten tips for future students, and they're quite worth paying attention to.

Obscure dream about an aircraft carrier type ship that covered about 3/4 of the atlantic ocean. I think it was intended to be some giant artificial country.

I was at the headquarters of some giant company, looked like the designs for the new Apple HQ, I was doing some sort of volunteer work. At some point I got hired. I remember a theme of suspicion. Someone was up to something evil there, and the whole dream I was just sort of snooping around.

non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening

(...) I am at the edge of a balcony, slightly aware I'm dreaming and making considerations about lucid dreams. I am not afraid of the height because I know I can fly or hover and will not hit the floor if I fall. But that's not enough. I realize that I need not to be afraid of hitting the floor, because there is no floor. I make an effort to become fully lucid to do an experiment. I let my body lean forward and just let go of all fears and all doubts. My body goes through the dream balcony and I free fall. I only feel the uncomfortable sensation in the stomach, of falling in the void, for about 2 seconds and then its gone. I see the ground closer and closer but I also go through it and then I'm free falling in the darkness. I don't make any effort to stop it, I let go completely.
After a while, the falling sensation stops by itself and I find myself being laid out gently on a grassy patch under a tree at nightime. I feel peace and I feel like meditating. I decide to get up and do a walking meditation. I try to visualize a Buddha against the night sky. I can't. Instead I see a white light that starts from a point and expands into the shape of an angel like figure. From it I hear a "hello". The light shines brighter and I hear again "Hello, [my name]!". I recognize the voice of my guru. I don't just recognize his voice, I feel him! Hard to explain the entirety of what happens in these few moments. I feel overwhelmed. I wake up.

I was a young child at my grandmas place. Me and another child were in the shed playing a game. it was some kind of car game. the game was somehow linked to my real life and Ben an old sexual partner and where to sleep while getting him to sleep next to me. There was also some mention of the people inside being too hot. My friend said we were fine in the shed. I said that's because we have an air-conditioner in the shed while they only have one for the lounge and one for the kitchen. I thought that doesn't sound right. When I raced around the toy car the aim was to hit a certain object. There was a power up I kept finding too powerful for the car and kept switching back and forth. I also had to avoid objects that sometimes moved and would multiply as the game got harder. I got to level 9 before I couldn't find the object I was supposed to hit.

An unexpected surprise

I travelled outside to find the object and couldn't find it. Instead what I found was a lobster in a bag. I felt sorry for the poor creature. And remembering that there was a beach just a few paces away I decided to set it free. My friend came with me, something I didn't expect but was glad she did.

As I walked, I kept shaking the bag down afraid the lobster would hurt me. The lobster kept getting closer to my hand, the closer I got to the beach. When it was nearly at my hand, it was no longer a lobster but a kitten. I kept shaking the bag down now afraid of the kitten. Then I remembered my kitten at home bites me all the time and it doesn't hurt. So I let the kitten out of the bag. I let it bite my hand. It didn't hurt just like at home. I then realised the beach wasn't the proper place to let it free and resolved to free it in the park.

Escape

I was embarrassed and sure my friend wouldn't come with me this time. Again she surprised me by agreeing. Now we had a problem. How to leave the house without the adults knowing we had gone. I first went to go out the gate, then my friend warned me Grandma and Mum was out there. I could hear there voices chattering through the open gate and resolved to find another way. My friend suggested we get a taxi from the back yard drive way. At first I thought our parents would see us. I then realised they would only see the taxi, not us get into it. Then I realised the taxi drivers would be suspicious of two 5 year old children unaccompanied by an adult and told my friend so. It was then I came up with an idea.

In the back yard was an alleyway. I suggested to my friend we go down there. My idea to cross the road go down the street and turn back to the park. She agreed. Everything went to plan, though we got a few strange looks from some people. Trouble started when just at the end of the street across from the park we ran into some policemen, who noticed us from the station. They stopped us and asked where we were going. I politely told them that we were off to the park to speak to the park man then straight off home. They told us they would wait for us at the front of the park to ensure we safely get home. Therefore presenting a problem of being caught.

At the park we spoke to the park man, while a lady took a photo. Realising we couldn't be caught on camera we ran away.

The cauliflower man

Jumping and climbing from tree to tree we ran. Down below us the news told of two missing children while the police chased after us. We were quite famous. Eventually we ran into a strange looking man who resembled cauliflower. He was about to commit suicide. We convinced him not to. It turned out he was the owner of the cat. Running into the cauliflower man, we found a cauliflower costume that the man wore to make himself look normal. we hid in the costume. As we were walking, we talked to the man. a lady looked strangely at us. The man said he was praying. She didn't believe him and walked off.

The Teacher

The cauliflower man became a teacher. There was another teacher who was mean and successful. He had many trophies that he got to keep as long as his teaching was successful. The cauliflower man became a very popular teacher. The bad men's class kept emptying and emptying until there was no more students in his class. The Principal ordered all of his awards taken to the new teacher. The bad man swore revenge.

When the principal came to check up on the cauliflower man's class he was seen telling off a student. The principal left happy. The cauliflower man, as soon as the principal left, showered the child with candy. The child happy, left to write in his book. In his book the child wrote pictures showing him having a conversation with his parents. This changed to a different scene of the kid talking to his parents.

"how was school?" the father asked. "It was great we get to do nothing at school". "good" said his father. "we get candy every day" ,"great" said his father. "And he is dressed in a costume." "A costume?", 'Is it a cow?" "no","Is it a dog?" "no, its a cauliflower man." "What his father shouted angrily." "a cauliflower man." "No son of mine is going to school with a teacher dressed as cauliflower."

The Lady

The father kicked up a big fuss. He arranged to have the principal remove the man. The bad man happy of this news went to tell the Teacher. Luckily the teacher had been warned. He told everyone repeating everything we said in the costume. "I have decided to leave this school and start my own church where all the money will be given to charity." (The Teacher was unhappy at this last bit. We also had no money or church.) The Teacher became even more popular and all the children that were in his class instead went to his church. It was then that the teacher saw the same Lady from before. She apologised to him and said that she believes him now and gave him 3 million dollars, much to the cauliflower man's happiness. It was then I woke up.

This is the first entry to my dream journal on this site. I have good recall and don’t write down my dreams often, only when they start to slip. I’ve decided to do this as it has been said to be extremely important and I’m going to take their word for it.

Last night had a pretty good dream and some fuzzy ones. The last thing I had before bed was some tea and then an apple, nothing particular to aid lucidity (although apple juice does help so why not apples?). Anyway, I was going to try WILDing again but was simply too tired. I went to sleep at my normal time, got to sleep normally. I read A Clash of Kings before bed.

The Dream

I was in a park sort of area with some people, two gangs. One of them I was a member of, a pretty important one too. Both groups were arguing over who owned a pair of broken bongos. A member of my gang, who had the voice of one of the smooth posers in Adventure Time, offered to fix the drums with a bongo-spanner, a small tool that looked like an small corkscrew. This offended the opposing gang leader, a short man with slicked back hair and a Spanish accent. He began insulting the smooth poser until my gangs leader stepped in and defending him. The enemy leader took this as a challenge and took out a knife. My gang drew weapons including a pipe, a cricket bat and a short dagger. I had some sort of wire held between two wheels. When the fight started, I snuck up on an enemy gang member and choked him to death. Some short woman with red hair and a Tommy gun called my methods too brutal. I dismissed these claims. The fight was unconvincing, like something from a B-movie.

I woke up, almost wanting to laugh at the absurdity. I attempted a WBTB but realised it was morning already and there wasn’t enough time.

i was in a car with my family and i thought something wast right so i plugged my nose and i could breath so i yelled out im dreaming and ive always wanted to do that hand through the finger thing so i tried too push my finger through my hand and it worked but it felt wierd so i stopped and got out of the car and walked in a town where my cousin shawn was there and i knew i could comunicate with my subconsious so i said can i lucid dream tomorrow and shawn and all the people stopped and looked at me in confusment but i heard my subconsious say yes then i woke up.

also for some reason i have been lucid dreaming for the past three days and i havent even been trying plz can someone tell me why the past three days iv been have ing lucid dreams

And last night's dream continues! Well, sort of. This one was pretty vivid, too, but it got kinda fuzzy once I woke up. Actually, I can hardly remember specific details now. This time, it was more like a typical video game dream for me; I could only see the screen, like watching a dream in third-person, except I knew I was playing the game (in the other dream, I could still see my room). Also, other characters could actually talk, as opposed to having a dialog box pop up on the screen.

I was playing the "new" Zelda game again (see my previous entry: http://www.dreamviews.com/blogs/fenn...a-games-37018/). This time, though, I'd already completed the game and was replaying it because I'd unlocked bonus stuff or something. I was in this building, and there were various traps and things that I had to get past (but I already knew how to because I'd apparently done it before).

I eventually reached a glass elevator and went down. Then, I got back in and went up, hoping I wouldn't end up on the same floor as before (remember, it was a video game, so things like what floor I went to weren't necessarily up to me). It went all the way to the top, where there was a shop. The shopkeeper offered me two amounts of money - a larger amount and a smaller amount. I can't remember the exact values. I chose the smaller amount, but then he started yelling at me, telling me to take the larger amount, so I did.

I think there was more to the dream after that, but I can't remember.

After that dream, I woke up and started thinking about it to recall as much as I could. I ended up falling asleep again after a couple minutes or so, causing me to have a dream where I was in the car, thinking about what I was going to write in my dream journal when I got back to my cousins' house (that's where we were going). We soon got to my cousins' house, which looked nothing like it does IWL. When we got out the car, my dad said it was raining, but my mom claimed it wasn't. I couldn't feel any rain, so I stuck my hand out in front of me and could feel rain. I thought it was a little odd that the rain stopped about a foot in front of me, but I didn't really think much of it.

In the next dream, my mom and I were walking down Main Street in the village near where I live, heading for a certain shop (which doesn't exist IWL). We were going there to find and purchase some natural remedy for... something. We entered the shop, arriving in a pink room that smelled strongly of perfume, with a white curtain sort of separating it from the shop itself. We walked past the curtain and into the shop.

Inside, the woman who owned the shop was busy giving a tarot reading to a customer, so my mom and I sat down at a nearby table to wait. There were tarot cards at this table, too, but they looked just like normal playing cards. My mom dealt out some cards (all the while, I was just thinking that she had no clue what she was doing) and then jokingly said that the cards said I would pick them all up (there were a lot on the table), but she picked them up anyway. Then, she told me that these cards were wider than the ones back in England, which meant that they had some sort of special meaning (of course, the real reason they were wider was because they were playing cards, which are wider than tarot cards anyway).

Then, I saw Makayla, a young girl from my church. My mom said she was here to tell us we have to take my friend's mom (not Makayla's mom) to the hospital, as we apparently had to every day at this time. She asked me if I just wanted to be checked out at the hospital while we were there or if I wanted to come back here afterwards instead. Honestly, though, I had no idea what we had even come here for.

So, I only really post on my DJ when I have a dream that really sticks with me that I want to remember, and this was one of them. I think it came from watching the news about the guy who walked into a theater during The Dark Knight Rises and started shooting everyone. My dream is sort of based on that, so it's a bit disturbing.

I was at my local park with Niki and we were just hanging out. The sun had just set and it was getting darker out. There was a movie theater there at the park, Showtime Cinema. Of course it didn't occur to me that this theater is not located in the park obviously, but just a few minutes down the road. Nothing seemed out of the ordinary, so I just went to check out the theater, perhaps to see what was playing(which I think was Dark Knight Rises, but I don't remember for sure). Instead of the whole movie theater being there, it was just one screening room. I sneaked in through one of the emergency exits, which wasn't locked for some reason. The theater was packed with people, and I looked around and saw a guy with a gun. Shots were fired, so I ran back out before the shooter could notice me and dialed 911. The lady on the other line seemed familiar, like I'd called 911 a few times already and had heard her voice before. She seemed very chill and relaxed. "911 what's your emergency?" she asked in a very monotonous tone. "There's a guy shooting people at Showtime Cinema! People have been killed, please send someone over." I said. "Someone will be right there," she replied, not a hint of worry or tension in her voice. I thought she would want more information, but she didn't say anything else so I just said "thank you" and she said "you're welcome. bye" like it was a normal everyday phone conversation. I waited outside awhile and it seemed to be taking the police forever to show up. Then, the theater doors burst open and people came running out. I thought it was finally over, until I saw the shooter come running out after them, shooting every person he could. There was blood and screaming; it was a terrible and frightening scene. He shot and killed one of my friends, Dani, and then came towards me. He took a shot at me and missed but I fell to the ground and pretended to be dead so that he wouldn't keep shooting. When I looked at him again I noticed that he was so angry and raging that he didn't notice he'd run out of bullets and was now just shooting blanks. So I stood up to him. I don't exactly what happened, but whatever I did worked and the cops came and everything was secured. The next thing I remember was reflecting on what had just happened. I vividly recalled all the blood, the screaming, the chaos, the dying, and it traumatized me. I cried and cried throughout the day and the next day. I kept having flashbacks and it was just awful. Then I realized that this was probably just a dream, so I talked to my mom and she showed me a newspaper article headlining the terrible event. There was some kind of picture that was blurry and I don't remember, and then somewhere in the writing they mentioned that I was a hero. I was too distraught to even think about being a hero though. 36, that number kept following me around. I could physically see that number, floating in the air around me. 36 people dead. So much death. I cried again, the pain was so real, the emotions so intense. Then I woke up for real and breathed a sigh of relief when I could finally know for sure that it was just a dream.

Im with A and im looking through a house of memories I tell my self that.

I tell my self that memories are unstable and that they change everytime you look at them
the front of the house keeps changing and everytime I open this door this clothing sign keeps changing the words on the sign

i keep opening the door and it says SUP then I realize IM DREAMING I look down too become aware of what im wearing

Im wearing white button up shirt and white cargo shorts I lift up my shirt and my skin is way lighter than it normaly is

I put my shirt down and realize there a blue shirt under the white one with a yellow 2 on it with rhombus around it
I pull the white shirt around the blue one then pull it down and look back at the blue shirt and the rhombus with the 2 in it had moved down the shirt on the left corner

I need to stabilizes so I study the carpet on the ground I crouch down and see that the carpet is white and stringy there are other colors mixed in but mostly purple it looks like realy amazing matrial I rub the carpet too but dont remember how it feels but it looks silky I spin and I can balance on my foot easly but I cant spin faster for some reason I try to bring my arms closer to me to spin faster but I cant for some reason a force stops me then I spin agian and its like my body spins but my head stays still its weird

I start to bend over boxes so I stop spining I look at my watch and it like the clock face got turned upside down the reflection on the glass on my watch is just the same watch upside down wierd I start to think of a power to use then I wake up

09.08.2012

Waterslide College (Non-lucid)

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID

I remember coming to visit some kind of dorm. They were having a party in there. I was with Sam and my friend Julia. Once we walked in, I saw the entrance to a waterslide on the other side of the room. Well it wasn't really an entrance, it was an exit.

There were a lot of people in here having fun. I remember seeing a weird creepy guy (the guy in the new Footloose that offered the main character a smoke), and he offered us some kind of yellow concoction. I remembered hearing a guy yell to him, "Hey! Be nice!"

The dean walked through the doorway. Everyone stopped and stared. As fast as they could, they ran through the waterslide exit, into which we found that there was a secret waterslide entrance that led out of the dorm. We took it, and it was pretty cool. Once we got out, we found out that this college was full of waterslides. You traveled by water, pretty much. We walked along the water path behind the people that had the party. There was a huge "hole" in the ground, but it was actually several waterslides joined together forming the outside of the hole, and a pool of water in the middle. On the outside of this hole was a lazy river all around. Pretty cool.

Somehow being here, I got lost from Sam and Julia. I panicked, not knowing what to do. I overheard a person of authority (probably a teacher) say that the water was getting rough in certain dorms. (Like where you saw the waterslide exit in the dorm)

I gasped. I had to find them, they didn't know.

I got out of the water and looked around. There were so many waterslides I couldn't find the right one that led to that specific dorm. So I ran on the street looking for that dorm. I finally found it. I ran around to the side of the building, and sure enough, the entrance for that waterslide's water was covering the hole, so you would just be swimming if you tried to slide down. I looked around for them. Sam and Julia were standing on the ledge right when you slide down. The ledge was about 3 feet below the asphalt that I was standing on.

I grabbed Samantha's arms and pulled her up, and we did the same for Julia.

Then the dream ended.

09.08.2012

Island Fun (Non-lucid)

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID

I remember being on some kind of tropical island that was raised up from the ground. If I looked out towards the water, all I could see was water, no land in sight. But this tropical island was pretty big. It was populated.

I wanted to jump off of the island into the water, but I was kind of afraid to. So I took a running start. I jumped off and landed into the water from about 20 feet in the air. It was fun. I got scared for some reason, probably about the sea creatures. So I swam back to an island that was more closer to the ground, and climbed up on it. It was one of those very small circular islands like you see in cartoons. It wasn't made of sand though, the bottom of all of these islands were made of rock.

I climbed back up using smaller islands as "stepping stones". I eventually found my way back to the top. I remember that I made a friend there. He was a talking crab/lobster (Sebastian?) who had a little human qualities about him.

I decided to jump off again, this time grabbing my friend. He was the size of my hand. I ran towards the edge, and leaped off once more. Falling into the water, I started to swim back to the smaller island. But something weird had happened. The current around the smaller islands overlapped with the current from the sea, making a small waved wall about 2 feet high streaming continuous water. I tried to swim through it, but it kept pushing me back. I swam down the little wave wall looking for a smaller entrance, and sure enough there was a smaller one. I swam towards it. There was a palm tree right next to it, in which I could "boost" myself over the current wall. So I did, and made it! I made it back onto the small island. It was about dusk now. I realized by now that my friend was no longer in my hand. I thought about going to to find him in the water, but I was afraid I would get stuck. He was a crab, anyways.

Last night, I had a surprisingly vivid dream.

I was playing the "new" Zelda game on the Wii (I have no idea what it was called, but it's not a real game IWL). I was playing it on my TV in my room, though, so it should have logically been an N64 game (only console in my room; the Wii is in the living room), but it was a Wii game. It started out in the Shadow Temple, which reminded me a lot of the Shadow Temple in Wind Waker (wait... Wind Waker doesn't even have a Shadow Temple). I soon found out that Link could transform into a wolf, like in Twilight Princess. After hearing him scream upon returning to Hylian form, I decided I wouldn't transform unless absolutely necessary (there was no way to skip the transformation like in Majora's Mask).

I kept playing and soon found Zelda. She was unconscious. I brought her out of the temple, and she woke up. She had a bag of something that looked like pot (I think). She said it was actually cocaine and suggested putting it in coffee to make the coffee taste better. The only option for replying to her was to refuse. Then, a message popped up that said something about the Swedish not supporting the use of cocaine (as the game was apparently made by Mojang).

I somehow ended up back at the title screen. I turned off the game and decided to watch My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic (even though I don't have Netflix on the TV in my room).