memorable

I am captured somewhere. Its near London Bridge. It is a complex of various alleys and tunnels. I think I work there in a restaurant. There are people securing the place. I can see some manager chatting with the guard. I run along a wall and I climb over various balconies and jump over roofs. Then I jump down, where is another really nice restaurant with pillars everywhere. I can see sun shining through (source of light in my dream??). I want to buy an ice cream. I can see they do scooped or spined ice cream. But the scooped is portioned by scratching it off. They have blueberry one and a little bit of vanilla one. At least I think its vanilla ice cream, it looks like it but its strangely yellow. There is also chocolate one and I think to myself that they don’t have any ice cream that I would like. Then some customer asks the shop assistant something about different ice creams. The shop assistant says that they do have other ones, and points with his finger on the board with types and prices. There is one that looks like a ice hockey touch. Then I am going back, but its a long way. It goes through Tesco, particularly through the cosmetics section. I walk through and it goes to some big garden. It reminds me of Cambridge and the gardens they have there around the universities. It’s surrounded by high wall with a gate. Through the gate is coming V3S van. It goes slowly towards me, trying to fit through the hate and it almost hits a statue that is there. So I walk further and through the gate. There I see a huge care (I think its Caterpillar) and it’s manoeuvring very strangely around. Its starts turning around until he has one wagon in the front and the other at the back. Then I realise that he wants to pull both of them at once. I come to a place where are to forklifts in which one of them is sleeping worker. I try to sneak through. I am looking for something, I think it’s a box. Then one of the workers takes the box on the forklifts arms and then the whole forklift is lifted up by another excavator. Then I turn around and a kind of teddy bear animal comes to me ( I have seen it before in my dream). So I pick it up and ask the guy in the excavator how he can explain that a teddy bear can come to me like this. I tell him that I don’t believe in ghosts and some mumbo jumbo stuff. But he doesn’t know how to explain that. Then I return to the London bridge place.
**I am at work and we have lasagne for lunch. It’s flying of the counter, selling really well. Then Lione comes and we joke around and flirt. I am surprised because she never buys lunch. So we just chat about dancing and what we are up to during the weekend. Its seems pretty obvious that something is hanging in the air. Then she pays for the lunch and leaves. But she forgets the lasagne there, so she comes back in a few seconds.

I don't even know where to begin, this has never happen to me before, not like this.... ! It was SO CRAZY .. !

I am in a dream , sleeping .. dreaming .. turns into a nightmare , I am in this group of people going to meet the devil , but in my dream I kept referring to him as Lucifer.
I look into the sky and there are minions flying everywhere spitting out fire balls on the ground...



I look at the center of the field and I see this "Lucifer" being ,,
he's dark purple in color , long black horns ,, has hooves for feet ...



and in an instant everyone around me dies when he snaps his fingers they all burst into fire
and die...



I am standing alone ,, looking around at the floor ...dead bodies everywhere... Lucifer tries to take me... reaching his hand out for me,, but I don't want to go ! I won't go!



So I'm in this dream/nightmare, but I start having conscious thoughts like when you're awake and can talk to yourself inside your mind .. I was able to do this in my dream , becoming "Lucid"
and can hear a small voice inside me saying , "Don't panic, but.. get out of here now!!" I push off the ground and start to fly !



I am then taken to so many beautiful scenaries , but the scene keeps changing ... fast ! I'm in one place, then another, then another ! All so beautiful !! So CAPTIVATING !
I saw this ocean surrounded by beautiful mountains it was breath taking , I could feel myself getting too excited , I started to fly , faster .. faster and faster !



Then ,, I started losing control of the dream a lil bit...

I could feel my heart beat start to race really really fast ,, complete and total adrenaline rush !! I don't know if I just had the sensation of that in the dream or if that was happening in real time, real life...
but however, just to be safe I still I thought to myself "I have to go back I don't want to give myself a heart attack in my sleep?!"



I can feel I'm flying still (in the dream) , then all a sudden I'm in 2 places at once .. this lucid dream ,, then I can feel myself laying on my bed asleep at the same time!



Then those visuals of flying come to an end , everything changes...



My whole room becomes dark , (by the way my eyes are still closed , but I can still see everything with my minds eye I guess they call it )..



So... my bed starts spinning and sinking simultaneously .. !!
All I begin to see is me sinking further and further into my bed, like free falling down...down...down... it seemed to never stop,, I don't know if I was excited or scared, I think a little of both !



Either-way I was getting nervous cause it felt like I was about to black out and I was afraid of where this next dream would take me ,, so I finally snap out of it and I make myself
wake up in the physical world....



I still have that vision in my head, the visuals were just WOW intense & mind-blowing ,, it was all so detailed, so vivid, sinking in the bed, so graphic , it's like my bed was melting into the ground ,
I was still me I was able to have my conscious thoughts it was I guess a type of sleep paralysis , asleep , but awake at same time...

I hadn't had a crazy dream experience in about a month and a half, I thought maybe all of it stopped , but I guess not.. this experience though , which was a lil terrifying ,
was still kinda cool .. I think ..

26/01/2010
I decide to try an OBE in the morning.

My energy body becomes relaxed quickly. I have various sensations of floating, and sinking. Eventually my legs become 'lose' and start floating up. I try to loosen my body,and eventually slide out my feet onto the window sile at the end of my bed. I look out the window. ( There is a tree there that has lots of yellow flowers on it in RL) . All the yellow flowers turn into canaries and start singing it really comical and beautiful at the same time ( a year on I can still remember it clearly). I try and go out but the venison(SP?) blinds start hurting me, like cutting into me. I decide to go out my bedroom door instead.
I lose my vision but can still feel things so I continue on, my vision comes back. My house is a mess, things are everywhere. I walk through the kitchen, there is a fridge in my living room, the door is open and inside are all these different coloured bottles of soft drink, they are glowing,green blue, orange. I decide to get one and drink it. It fizzes up and spills. I hardly get to drink any of it. It changes colour from green to orange.
As I pick a another green one up it turned to blue. I thought the reflection was playing tricks on me. It was kind of shimmering blue/green. ( this was really cool)
I turn round and notice the shower is on I head in to turn it off. The taps are strange, there are leavers and you turn it. It takes some time for me to figure out how to turn it off.
I decide I will head outside, as I go back through the kitchen I see a big bread knife, I consider cutting my self to see what is is like.. I'm in a dream why not?.. I quickly decide not to do that.
As I get to the back door the sky is so bright it blinds me and I lose my vision. I almost lose the dream.. I can hear my self breathing. I can still feel the dream so I try to feel every step on the stairs as I go down and hold on to the railing. I get to the bottom there is a pile of dead mice .. wtf.. I just step over them and ignore them. I keep walking there are heaps of cars parked in the street, my neighbour is having a party. I decide it would be fun to go for a drive. I pick up some small stones, to smash the windows. As I am walking over to the cars I see a bigger rock. I pick it up. It is much lighter then I thought it would be.
There is a limo in my driveway so I go to smash the window but the door is not locked, too easy, so I get in and start driving. The seat is too close and I am squashed against the steering wheel. I move it back... I think I lost lucid now... My brother is with me in the limo we are speeding around and fishtailing etc, I crash into a tree, I decide its time to wake up now.

I remember a campsite and some unknown forest that must've been created in my mind unlike most camping dreams where it is the same kind of campsite it always is. This one was unrecognizable with triangular prism shaped tents and no campers or RV's.

Me and some new friends that I met at the campsite decided to go exploring in the woods for no reason and occasionally it was swampy and muddy but it always seemed like we were walking down a slope and the deeper we got the more fog blinded our long distant view. We started seeing dead trees and then a destroyed small house with the kitchen appliances and cabinets still intact. After we found the small house, we saw the Grim Reaper wondering the woods with glowing red from his skull's empty eye sockets.


This picture looks close due to the trees & the plainness but there was no snow & he also had red glow coming from his eyes & black aura from his hands.

We saw him just walking around like we weren't there until we saw him turn and look at us and we knew he was coming after us. We ran and tried to avoid knives he threw at us and his hidden blade he had in his sleeve along with the scythe.

Just about when all hope was lost, I found a small pocket knife on the ground and quickly grabbed it and stabbed him in the side. He made an evil hissing sound and started to disappear in a black mist that quickly floated away. We were still unsure what to do and I quickly ran up to see his weapons he carried and took the hidden blade, the small knife I used to kill him, and the cloak while my friends took the rest of his things evenly with each other including the scythe, his thrown knives, and a short sword.

A white creature like a mouse but constantly changing shape ran from the reaper's empty clothing after we got some of his items and I chased it until I realized that it was about to attack me. At this moment I knew I was dreaming but when I looked around the dream continued instead of becoming fuzzy and ending like it does 80% of the time when I realize it's a dream. I told myself out loud that this creature will die and not harm me. Surprisingly it didn't die and disappeared in the ground. I then started observing the loot I obtained from the Grim Reaper and realized that the hidden blade had broken on the part where it attaches to your arm. I then closed my eyes and said the parts required will materialize in my hand. At that moment, two parts both interlocking metal pieces with slots for straps on the back of them appeared in my hand. I put them together and strapped the hidden blade to my arm and tried it out and it worked. It sprang out like Assassin's Creed Style and it was black with red designs on it.

I had the Grim Reaper's cloak and the hidden blade along with my sword (the one I own) and the small knife all equipped to me and at that moment I could see a black aura around my hands and my vision became darker. I felt like I had unstoppable power flowing in the palms of my hands.

I then remember walking in the woods a little longer and then I woke up to my alarm clock.

I ate some peanut butter before going to bed, which could possibly be why this lucid came up. I'm not sure. I have had some fleeting lucid experiences in the past, but none like this.

We had English projects due. I found that I was in a computer lab with some people I know in real life. I found out that this one person and Amanda, a girl I used to be interested in needed a computer, so I let the group leader ( a freckled, orange haired girl ) take my computer.

In the hallway, I see Amanda. The halls are huge and much more grand than the ones in my school. It's like a mix between a castle and a school really, and I can imagine colourful banners running along the walls, and a flag of course.
As I pass her in the hallway, a few seconds later, I suddenly realize that I'm dreaming.

I don't bother stabilizing the dream ... mostly because I forget to, and I'm caught in the moment. I'm awed by how life-like everything is. It's 'almost' exactly like it would be in real life, even though I've never been to this school before. I glance around rapidly, trying to find Amanda. I remember racing through the hall shouting her name, yet my voice comes out much weaker than I want it to. I spin around and close my eyes, imagining that I will appear where she is, but I don't really believe it and it doesn't happen. Students pass by me, but I don't really take notice of them.

After realizing that I've failed in finding her, I decide to go flying. It was an amazing first experience, although it felt more like I was levitating really fast rather than flying. I get scared because of how fast / high I'd went ( nearly hit the school ceiling ) and I slow down time so it feels like I'm going slower, although it doesn't really help.

I make my way to the school gymnasium. It's absolutely huge, with walls seeming hundreds of metres apart. There is this little playground-like area in the middle of everything, although it pales in size when compared to the whole room. Here, I remember to stabilize my dream. I think I was licking the floor or something, and trying to feel how real everything was.

I took advantage of an empty gymnasium and decided to do some tricks. I tried to do a few twisting things, but they really didn't feel 'right' so to speak. When I have enough ( only one or two tricks ) I fly out of here.
I appear outside of the school, where I can see the brown brick wall. I tried to go through the school walls. The first two times I hit solid brick, but I make myself believe that I can walk through it, and I easily slip back through. Back in the gymnasium, I try to picture myself turning invisible, but no success.
I do a pose like you see video game characters do before they cast a skill. I think I should choose a cool one, because I'll be doing this pose a lot. Momentarily I see my arm fall under a cascade of silver, but it turns back to normal just as quickly.

At the front of the school, I see two boys coming out of a car; one is young, looking no older than 11 or so. I ask him what my name is, and he replies "Your name is a list.", or something like that. It's rainy and gray outside. Soon afterwards, I lost lucidity and fell into a FA.

I think I was thinking about my real body, and that led to a loss in lucidity. Nonetheless, this was an amazing first lucid.

a
2/18/2011

Mall Hospital

All one long dreaming marathon, I'd conservatively guess at an hour in duration.

Its night and I am flying around over some highways. [I find myself doing this often, I fly following the highway, this often turns into a driving dream.] I see a shipping port off to left and for some reason think that Superman's evil friends are coming into town. Then they are supposed to be in the car I am in. Then I imagine they are shooting lasers out their eyes at the under part of the over pass but I know they aren’t really here at all.

I am exploring in a building. There is no one in there but imagine there is and I am fighting them, almost like how a kid imagines that his action figures are real. I hide behind this and that and throw a flask of exploding oil. I feel that I would have won at this point and leave through the double doors.
I am in a mall like place with a lot of different people, hundreds, of all ages. I walk around and see some places that look like hospital rooms and those hospital desks where the professionals sit and do their work.

This huge mall hospital had a children’s section which I found after much walking. I saw one boy looking up at a hanging mobile. It was a colorful fish I thought. I saw water dripping from it and thought it might be the air conditioner moisture dripping down or the boy has a secret stash of liquid explosives up there dripping because of a leak! I liked the second idea and started looking around for a bomb. Bored, I walked outside after a little walking around looking in potted plants and stuff.

There was a large parking lot out here. I walked onto a grassy median and saw a penny on the ground and being a penny collector I bent to pick it up when I saw 2 more, then 2 more. They were covered in dirt and I could feel the grains of dirt between the pennies and thought I could clean them later. There were some teens boy and girl talking and flirting by their car who were caught off guard by me. I hoped I didn’t look like a dork picking up pennies off the ground.

Dreamy Feelings
Napping

I closed my eyes to rest a bit but did not want to become fooled by the deception of dreaming. Each time I would start to dream I'd catch it and come back to just being in darkness. I came to see that I really liked the feeling of letting go and letting my dreaming entertain me. This became the feeling I was fighting. It would be like being in a really good movie and trying to avoid it dragging you in. After about ten minutes of this I woke up surprisingly refreshed.

I am feeling there is a big entertainment quality to our dreams, that we need to some extent, this may be what is so refreshing about sleeping. It felt like my consciousness was a heavy load that I could put down and rest from. This feeling is in opposition to the euphoria of LDing. Its like saying you can't enjoy the play if you're its director. Still I will find a way to reliably become the regular director on a regular basis. It may just take denial of the seductive pleasures of letting go and letting the dreamy feeling entertain you.

Dream - Lucid - AP

I was in my bed. I looked over at my phone, which was charging. The front screen was blinking on and off. I took it to my mom to see if she could fix it. She did, and gave it back. I went back to sleep, and woke up and it was again messing up. I repeated bringing it to my mom, and she fixed it again. This process repeated one more time.

Then, I went into my mom's office. She had found some weed I had apparently had, and had it dumped out on her desk. She was making it into a big pile. I told her not to mess it up or lose any of it because I was going to smoke it. She got up and left the room. I started to collect it back into the baggie it came in.

~

I was in a car. It was very dark, and I couldn't figure out where I was at first. Then, I started to hear Jenny's voice very vividly. She is a girl that I went to high school with and who comes into the coffee shop from time to time, but we've never really had a conversation, or acknowledged each other's existence. She was sitting in the passenger's seat, and Caitlin was driving and talking to Jenny. In the dream, Jenny and Caitlin were best friends.

We ended up at what was apparently my new apartment, which I was sharing with Caitlin and Katie. I remember my room being the first one on the right, closest to the living room. I had my own bathroom, while Caitlin and Katie shared one. There was a party going on at the apartment. I saw my grandma there, and she was walking outside to what looked like a bunch of gas pumps. The ground was very icy, and she was trying to avoid the ice so she didn't slip and fall. A lady came up to me and started saying how my grandma couldn't do it, and was saying some other things about her. I got very angry, and started yelling at her, defending my grandma. Someone had to hold me back so I didn't hit her.

Then, I wanted to smoke some weed. Everyone was ok with it, except for Jenny, so we didn't smoke (this was never voiced in the dream, it was just understood). The party then started to clear out. I saw Ryan sitting in a recliner. We went off to my room, and I asked him if he wanted to stay the night. He said
"Yeah, I have to get up in an hour."
I looked at the clock, and it was 5:30am. We put on our pajamas and got in bed.

~

I was in what was, again, my new apartment. Lynsay and her ex-boyfriend, Parker, were there with me. We sat on my bed in a circle, ready to smoke some weed. We were trying to avoid others in the apartment from knowing that we were smoking. I started talking to Lynsay about my pipe, which, in the dream, she had given me (I bought it myself in waking life). Then, we started talking about my old pipe, which she also got me in the dream (again, I bought that one too). It's gone in waking life, but in the dream, I still had it.

Then, we were at an outdoor church. My brother and mom were there as well. There was a stage with a podium on it, and instead of pews, there were fold-out chairs for everyone to sit in. The collections envelope came around, and my mom put a few coins in, and so did I. Beside me was this clear, plastic nightstand type thing with 3 drawers that I have in waking life. In the bottom drawer is where I keep the container with my pipe in it. The preacher came down and asked me if the container in the bottom drawer was full of loose change. I lied and said yes, thinking that he would leave it alone after that. He tried to get into the drawer to get the container, but I told him no, don't touch that. He kept trying to sneak over to get it, and I kept telling him no.

After all that, Lynsay, Parker, and I decided to get out of there. We were in the car, but it was dark, and none of us could remember how to get back to my apartment. I called my mom to ask her, and she told me we had to take this very confusing and specific route to get out, or we'd just end up back at the church. I knew if that happened, the preacher would catch me.

I had a dream I was watching a program about Hitler still being alive in a small house in England. The dream took place in 1997, which I somehow knew, and I saw Hitler's basement as a poorly looked after wine cell with evil Nazi technology inside it. The program went along going on about Hitler being evil and then cut to what I guess was an advert selling some dog called cookie or something, which became famous on the internet.

Skip a bit, there was a policeman riding along on his bike, and then several people said 'fucking cops' and rode past on their bikes and shot him off. Another policeman screamed "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO". Then, yet another policeman came along the pavement and cracked a joke along the lines of "Gor, £830 a week for that!". This part of the dream took place in something remniscent of an area in downtown Bournemouth, where there's a KFC and some bushes. It was all 1997-ized and looked more 'Londonish' though.

This dream was at roughly 7:20am, because I was fading in and out of sleep.

steve was driving me somewhere and we were talking and i tried to take pictures of some light up birds on my phone. they were flying high in the sky and they looked really cool. at first i thought they were fireflies. but steve told me they were birds. i wanted to take pictures of them with my phone. i started to try and then i noticed i could zoom in really close to them, and then turn the camera 360 degrees from that point. it was amazing. it was like i was flying with them. swooping over mountainous terrain and just gliding along. it was a really great dream. i'm not sure where steve was driving to or if i returned to the "car imagery" once i was flying with the birds.

a

2/17/2011
There is some kind of indoor fair and people are setting up tables. I have no idea how I got here or where here is but IO figure to go along with stuff and set up a table too. When I go to help set up another table I feel chilly and realize I am wearing a thong bathing suit!

I look down at it and try to act like I am not looking. Then I am like "well I am going to act like I want to so I don't seem like a fool. And maybe the ladies will like it."
I walk around and there are other rooms just like this one with fold out tables with nothing on them. Then I am outside in a fake looking park, it looks like a computer generated picture of a park. There is a tree which I think is nice and then a female lion jumps out of it but she is nice but I still jump up on a table just in case. I walk around some more.
I wake up
but do not move and I am fast asleep back inside the table place. I think about this place and what is here since this place is pretty boring. Then the female lion is back and I jump up on the table. She is aggressive to me and I think “what could defeat this lion? A bear.” Then my hands are huge bear paws and I knock her half lunge away with a swat. They look too strange to me having bear paws attached to human arms. Then I am becoming a whole bear, like a huge black grizzly. The lion lunges again and I hit her, and though it only feels like a slight slap, it sends the lion flying to the ground hard, she looks up hissing at me, beaten.

The dream began with my grandpa and me going to the bookstore. I have never done anything like this before so this should definitely have been a signal. As soon as we go in, we turn into the history section. He says something like we came here for fun, so I really don't need to buy anything. One book I remember seeing was a text about Genghis Khan. He picked up a book that had the word 'journey' on it, including several triangles on the cover. The dream then morphed to a house my mind created. I was there with this girl, her dad, and her boyfriend. Both the dad and boyfriend left. This girl was a total manifestation of my mind and I was definitely fond for her. She started asking me what I was doing that night, when I said that I wanted to be with her. Even though, truly I had never met this girl, she almost felt like my soulmate. She then asked my 'why' with a cute smile. I said that I really liked her. She was so happy and sat on the couch. But I didn't let her rest; it felt like the perfect moment, so I went in for a soft kiss, followed by a few extracurriculars. This felt so real, that every time I look back on it, it makes me smile. The dream progressed and several people showed up including her dad, boyfriend, and a few of my friends. I met her in a large hallway of her house, and we kissed again. No lie, this girl felt like the one. The dream then switched to a snowy field. It was a battle scene, and for some reason I was fighting the French. My gun never worked, and I missed every time I shot it. It felt like I was living Call of Duty. Eventually I entered a safe house occupied by a family. Don't really remember much after this, except that I was welcome.

best night ever. my first dream was i was at school, and for some reason i was preparing a party with this guy i know charlie. it was going well, and somehow the school ws connected to my house. we put on music, nd i suggested getting some more, he agreed, then rememered my taste in music, so ran of to get his own, while i tried to get mine. i was running at full bast when suddenly the alarm went of waking me, so i got up and turned it off. i then went back to bed, really wanting to re enter that dream, so i kept repeating to my self, "i will have a lucid dream, i will remember my dream" and then i found myself in my house. exept, on further observasion, it wasnt my house. i turned around. "im dreaming arnt i?"
"yes" a toad in a fez told me. i was amazed how clear and realistic the dream was, only to have it start to fade. i quickly put my hands infront of me and said out lout "increase lucidity" and the drem world became clear again. "congradulations on your first lucit the fez wearing toad told me. "now to help you with glasses. he told me that because i was acustomed to wearing glasses to help me in the real world, if i lost them in the dream relm the world would become un clear. to test, i took them off, and the world became not as clear again, and started to fade, i kept trying to clear the world, but it didnt work. the last thing the toad shouted was "picture yourself without glasses in your dreams!" and i woke up. i now no what all the fuss is about.

any ideas on who the fez wearing toad was would be nice.

This journal will serve as a record of my experimentation with Lucid Dreaming, and will be supplemented with another (unpublished) journal to keep track all lucid and non-lucid dreams. Currently, there are 3 different experiments I will be running:


Using Lucid Dreaming to Create False Memories

Using Meditation During a Lucid Dream to Extend Perceived Dream-Time

Using Lucid Dream to Accurate Observe the Waking Reality

Spoiler for More Details:

There will be a total of 20 trials, and each trial will consist of the following routine:

1.) I will be using a single multi-colored cube in a sealed plastic globe. The cube is 2" x 2" x 2" and the globe is 6" in diameter.



2.) Without looking (or with the assistance my of my wife) the globe will be shaken 10 times, allowing the cube to settle on a color unknown to me (of 6 possible colors).



3.) I will proceed to induce an LD.

4.) While dreaming, I will observe the color of the upper-most face of the cube.

5.) After coming to, I will note the color I observed while dreaming, and then note the actual color of the cube in the globe.

6.) I will then record the data here and in my unpublished journal.

7.) I shall repeat this sequence of steps until all 20 trials have been completed

8.) After step 7 is satisfied, I will then calculate the Binomal Distribution (probability) of my results.

I WAS ON THE STREET IN FRONT OF A BUILDING. jaylene was next to me. On the steps of the building was Michelle. She was reciting a poem. Ithen asked Jaylene "am I dreaming?" and she just shrugged her shoulders. I tried to push my finger through my hand and I felt my bones shift and my finger wenright through! I walked down the block and I told myself that my dreamguide wouldbe right around the corner. I looked down the hall and there was someone in a black cloak standing there with their back towards me. I hesitated for a moment, then I chased her down the hall. When I got to her I pulled down her hood and she was a little girl with curly brown hair and blue eyes. I asked her "are you my dream guide?" and she said "no". Then my cousin Josua started playing with her hair.

a
This is part of my effort to electronically record some of my older and more memorable dreams. I put these into a document then cut&past to DV. This one is as of yet undated but I am thinking 1999.

I am in a dark meeting room where everything is old wood like some old British library but this is a small room with a long table that can fit about 10 people. I am alone in the room and and walk around to explore a bit. There is a nice old grandfather clock in a nice wooden cabinet that catches my attention.
Then to my right, while still admiring the old clock, comes a person and to my astonishment it is me! He is followed by 9 other me's! They come from the right and the left! I feel there is an overriding part of me in this controlling some stuff here for me. I go to a seat at the table as we all do. I sit down in a seat I know that I should be sitting in and look at all these other me's. They all look the same but I can tell they are all very different and all of them have a different self view. They are all me yet all different me's! They have all come from their different lives and are all here to discuss somethings. I really want to hear what is going to be discussed! There is a head me who sits at the right far end and just takes charge. I am impressed by his take charge manner as I was in no way like that then. We all know he is the leader here. I marvel at how I am sitting at a table where everyone looks like me! He wastes no time and starts to talk and though I can tell this is his intro I can only hear "rrarr rarr arr arra arra." I am furious that this is somehow being blocked from me. I try to keep the dream alive but feel like I am being pushed out of it. I am pushed into darkness and wake up.