nightmare

The start of this dream is kind of a blur, but I remember being in school, and getting into trouble about something. The next thing I remember (although, I know things happened between them, but I just can't remember -__-) I'm walking down a pathway with my mother and sister. My mother is looking for a house where she needed to go because of that thing I got into trouble for at school (can't remember what it was :/). After a bit of walking, we saw the house around 200 m in front of us. (This was at night by the way).
We saw groups of people wearing dark clothes enter the house, and it seeemed like there was a party happening inside. I immediately felt a chill, like something was wrong with the house. My sister seemed to feel it too, but my mum kept on approaching the house. Me and my sister screamed for her to not go, and tried to keep her back, but she forced her way past us and ran to the house. We followed. My sister and I rushed to my mum, who was standing in front of a gate to the left of the main entrance. (This was within the actual front yard of the house). When I approached the door to see what was behind the gate, hands suddenly rushed from within the gate (i didnt see any other body part) and one of them grabbed me. I didn't know what was happening with my mum and sister, but the person holding my hand (i only saw his/her hand) said, as I tried to run away, "One by One, we'll get to you" or something like that in an evil tone.
The dream then fast forwards to me sitting in my parent's bedroom, with my mother and sister standing in front of me in dark robes, and shiny jewellery around their necks. I realised that my mother was wearing a necklace around her neck with the christian cross on it (we are not christian), and i felt an evil vibe from them. My sister was wearing somewhat revealing dark gothic clothes and also had shiny jewellery around her necks. I don't remember if she had a cross around her neck, though.

The dream (still continuing) then fast forwards to me, my younger sister (the same one from earlier in the dream - shes older than me but the younger of my two sisters), my mother and my eldest sister's fionce in an old car. My sisters fionce was driving the car. It was rainy and dark (at night). We drove (i didnt know to where) on and on, until my sisters fionce suddenly swerved to the right for an unknown reason, and drove off a cliff into a rocky floor below. We all got up safely and scared, and saw some builders working on building some stone pillars of some sort. Something I don't remember well happened, and then one of the builders said (referring to my sisters fionce) "Haha at least he won't be heere for long". The dream (still going on and continuing) then fast forwards to me sitting on a table and chair in front of the creepy house. This time its daylight, and I'm not afraid. I'm sitting at a table with a friend of mine. He smiles, and I wake up.

Evolventity's Dream

August 05, 2011

(Regular Dream) | Fell asleep by 10:30PM, woke up around 2PM.
I'm in someones house, I suppose my Aunt's, but the set-up is different. My cousin L* and friend K* are chilling. I'm observing, not interacting in this section of the dream. K* is laying on a couch, at the left, watching a movie: Ice Age. I suppose it's a new sequel. My POV changes to a scene inside of the movie in which a giant beast is chasing sheep through the ice and snow. K* asks L* for a drink and checks the refrigerator. She pours some alcohol, adds a little ginseng, and then a bit of beef flavoring. -I'm peeing in a bathroom which seems to be Nancy's house, but is set up like my cousins M*&S*'s bathroom. I'm peeing into a tub filled with tissue paper, which shrinks when being wet. L* appears briefly in the tub as if she were taking a bath in tissue paper, instead of water. -I'm laying in bed with L* and one of her friends comes into the room. She sets her dog down, like a chihuahua, with black and white spots and a red collar. The woman is skinny, with short red hair. She's stopping by to say hi. I've never met her before. The dog comes up to me and gives me kisses as I pet him, we all giggle. The visitor is named aRevolver, like a gun. She exits the room and is about to leave though I'd like to say bye. I put on my shirt and sweater to head out. I give her a hug outside in my Aunts backyard, and Google gives me a +1. I sit down in a chair in front of the futon swing. My sister S* is near me too, sitting at a wooden school desk. I take a good look around me and notice that mostly everyone here is gay and with a partner. Even the two guys on the futon. A gothic guy walks past me and triggers my memory of a movie that I've watched recently. I look to S* and she knows what I'm talking about but we can't remember the name of he movie. (It was Adam & Steve.) Anyway. I see a lady at a bar further away. She was recording me with her camera on her phone. I walk up to her and ask her to delete the video. She complains saying that I knew she was recording me because I was looking at her phone. I tell her no, I wasn't. She accuses me for another reason and then asks how I knew. I tell her that I know based on her reactions. I keep asking her to delete the video and she doesn't. Then she becomes a little frisky and tries to hit me. I grab her at the side of the arm before she does. She keeps trying to hit me, even kicking. She yells that I'm hurting/abusing her. Another black lady comes to help her and tries attacking me too. I comment on their suck-y fighting, considering I'm right in front of them, face to face.

(Regular Dream)
I'm in the passenger seat of my cousin Su*'s SUV, which is silver in the dream. She is driving on the highway and it is sunny, daytime. I have a sense that other family members are with me, and my boyfriend M* being behind my seat. He asks my cousin N*, to his left, for a cigarette. I give him the stink eye and point at him. I jokingly raise my hand like intent to slap. I turned forward for a moment and when I turn back around as he's lighting the cigarette, I snatch it from him and throw it immediately out my window. A silver car was behind us and dodged the cigarette which dropped a few yards away onto the ground. I realized I've littered, without thinking. I had a bad feeling from the car behind us. The car turned into the next lane to our left and sped ahead of us. I could see the passenger and driver in the front of the car writing down our license plate number. My feeling was right. It didn't seem that Su* knew this had happened. I wasn't sure what was going to happen; she'll be fined for something of my fault or I'll be taken to jail?

(Regular Dream, Fragmented)
I'm walking towards my friend K* whom is in the three foot shallow end of the peanut shaped pool within the middle of my apartment complex. The border has a dark green color, as usual, and the water is a light blue, It is day time and there are other people around our age swimming. I however, am fully clothed. K* is near a white strap cot which has her towels and newly purchased phone. -I'm near the cot and am wiping off water from her phone, probably from her handling. -K* changes into an old neighbor and friend, Z*. -I remember Z* about to hop out of the pool from the side. -I'm holding back some sort of branches at the cyclone fence. -I'm inside of a bounce house outside the fence. I need to cross from the bounce house to another location across from where I am. The scene has changed into a dimmer blue tone. I think I need to jump to save someone. I remember standing, being unsure of whether I will make it. I decide to take the risk anyway, and make a verbal comment like "fuck it" or something of-the-like. I run and jump. Strips of the bounce house comes with me and I am gliding towards the construction underneath a bridge. I glide between the sideways poles. Whatever material I'm attached to, behind me, is caught on the bridge structure. I'm twirling around the structure that I'm caught on, coming closer to the pole in a centripetal fashion. I quickly hit the center and die, everything turns to blackness, as usual. I wake up and go back to sleep.


(Regular Dream, Fragment)
M* and I had recently had sex. I'm in my Aunts backyard with other people. I'm playing an entertainment video on my laptop. A sex scene of M* and I from earlier is about to play. I cover the screen with a book so no one else can see, except my twin sister and I.

I was talking to my grandmother when her face became that of my Aunt (dead for over a year). I hated her in RL on a cellular level.
She Said:

"Only travel if you're alone"

this dream stood out and had the 'listen up' vibe I take care to pay attention to.

I had a dream that i was in the street and some guy was trying to get me and the other people, we ran into my friends house where all my parents, and my friends family were. We went through the garage and the men were at the front trying to close the garage door down..
I was worried and for my dad and stood in front of him in case the thing came and got him. Once the door was closed we all went inside and tried to comfort each other.

He broke in the house and we all got him but i was in charge of finishing him off.
I got him and put him inside my friends room and tried to kill him, but he wouldn't die, he then transformed in some kind of animal, like a cat i think (which was really disturbing because i absolutely love cats) .. and he would transform in my vision from a cat to a human.. I soon realised that this kind of person could not die, i could hurt him but no matter what i did he would still be alive ..he lay there gaining conscious now on the floor and i had to do something to stop him from killing everyone. i had to cut off all his limbs instead so even if he was alive he couldn't do anything because he couldn't move without any legs. arms or head. so i sat there trying to cut through everything, it was very hard to get through eat part and it was hard emotionally because he kept turning into a cat and i wanted to stop. the blood soaked into my friends carpet and i was worried she would be upset. after i finished cutting everything i walked out of the room and everyone was rather happy about him dying, but i still had an uneasy and sad feeling. Later that day i came back to my friend house and we sat in her room, all the blood was gone from the carpet, her mum had cleaned it up.

Hello! I'm on my third DJ entry now, and this one is quite a sexually explicit one so I won't post much details because of forum rules for posting sexually explicit details. So basically this entry is just fragments but still an entry none the less.

Anyway, on to the main topic of discussion which I believe would probably be my progress which I also believe is much more important. I can definitely see my recall improving which is great. As well, I'm starting to train myself to become more aware that I am dreaming. And finally, vividness is going up dramatically because of training my brain to recognise dreams.

I'm thinking that because I'm making use of my dreams that my brain finally recognises that they are not just useless pieces of information and throwing them away instantly when I wake up. I guess my advice to anyone who wants to have better recall and vividness is to start a dream journal. I can finally see why its recommended.

In terms of my latest sleep, its been pretty good. I can't complain. I went to bed at 6pm last night and woke up today at 9am.

Anyway, that it is for news today.

- Cheers!

August 3 - 4, 2011 - Dream Sex

Vividness: 7 / 10
Lucid?: No
# of Dreams: 2

Guide:

[-] Lucid
[-] Non - Lucid
[-] DC talk
[-] Notes

Alright, so this is kind of weird but before I start I need to mention that I actually had a feeling before I went to sleep that I was going to have sex in a dream. I guess that was what induced it.

Dream 1
I was with a bunch of friends in what seems like a weird sort of hotel - b&b. I remember sitting on the floor with my friends and we were playing cards in a dimly lit room. Can't remember the exact number of people there were but it was enough to fill a few rooms with what I assume 2 or 3 beds each. I shared a room with one of best friends M.C and we were about to head off to sleep when I abruptly mentioned to one of friends K.L who is a girl of course, if she wanted to have sex. Astonishingly, she said sure.

I can't believe I didn't go lucid here. I should have known that such a casual answer from her without any hesitation meant that I'm dreaming.

Anyway, I went to her room which she wasn't sharing with anyone and we were about to do our thing but she remembered that she had to do something first before we got started. She left the room and headed downstairs and outside. I looked out the window from my bedroom which overlooked the parking lot and I saw her dad sitting in a car and K.L talking to her dad. I decided to wait by sitting on my bed. After about 10 minutes I grew impatient and went outside to see what was going on. I saw her dad outside by the car and he gave me strange look.

Well this is awkward.

Well I guess she forgot about me or something because as soon as she saw me we went back upstairs and her dad drove off. I asked her as we were going up the stairs, "Can we finally have sex now?"
"Yeah alright you can do me if you want."

LOL.

We go to her room and we start...
(Sexually Explicit Stuff Here)
Finally, we're finished and I head out of my room and I see everyone standing out in the hallway with blank expressions. I guess they overheard us.

This is where it gets even weirder.

Dream 2
After I see everyone look at me I begin to experience some weird sort of hallucination. My dream transfers over to this shopping mall and I experience this weird hallucination not quite like any other dream I've had. I'm in this empty shopping mall and my vision seems really blurry. I'm looking for K.L but I can't seem to find her anywhere. The ground starts shaking and gravity is shifted horizontally. Tables and chairs go flying as I try to hold on to this pole. Its no use and I have to let go. I go flying sideways where I end up experiencing this long falling sensation.

I then wake up abruptly.

I think it was somewhat of a nightmare or something. It was pretty weird.

03.08.2011

Failing Brakes (Non-lucid)

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID

I hear this is a classic dream scenario.

I was driving a car with my dad. I tried to stop at a red light, and the brakes weren't working.

"STOP! STOP! STOP !STOP!!!"

I rolled right through the intersection. I decided to gas it once I was already halfway through.

"What the fuck were you thinking?"

"The brakes weren't working! Watch!" and I tapped the brakes and they did nothing.

Successful DILD!

I was in a library frantically looking for a book about scarves. I found the book and went up to the front counter. As the lady was handing me back my book here eye fell out, and rolled onto the floor. My face:

I was about to call 911, and I did a quick reality check. I was dreaming! The feeling on panic subsided. I stabilized the dream, and decided I wanted to go to Willy Wonka's Chocolate Factory.

I looked for the biggest book I could find, opened it, and found a big illustration of the factory. I touched the picture and my hand went through the page into the picture. I put my first foot in, then my next foot, and finally my whole body. I could hear a little splashing sound as I went through the page.

I looked around, everything was very bright and vivid. I was standing on a big field of lime green grass, and coconut trees. I could see Willy Wonka handing on the wall like spiderman, staring at me with the creepiest smile ever.

I bent down and pulled out a single blade of grass and put it in my mouth. A shocking sweet tasting blueberry exploded in my mouth. It tasted amazing. I turned out around, and suddenly Willy Wonka was there holding a coconut.

"Everything in here in edible." he told me.

He pulled out his tongue and handed it to me.

"Even this."
"You really want me to eat that?" I told him.
"It's a dream, who cares?"

He had a good point. I grabbed the tongue and put it in my mouth. The texture was bumpy, but it tasted like honey dipped in chocolate. I grabbed the coconut, and licked the outside. It had an orange taste.

"Where is the chocolate river?" I asked him, looking around.

Suddenly the ground dropped beneath us, and I was swimming in chocolate. It didn't taste like chocolate though, it has a sour taste. I could see these gummy fish swimming in the river. They came in all colors. Bright green, red, purple, and even teal.

I looked around for Willy Wonka and he was on a ladder in the middle of the river, holding a cloud. He told me to open my mouth. I did and lightning shot out of the cloud right into my mouth. It tasted like someone just poured a bottle of coke into my mouth.

Suddenly Willy Wonka looked at me like he was insane. He started to charge at me. I put out my hands and imagined a a big barrier coming out of my fist. Willy shot backwards, disappearing in the river.

Willy was no where in sight. I looked around, and realized this place was really creepy. I was alone in a huge chocolate river, and a lime green field with coconut trees. The river began to look like blood. Nobody else was with me, and I felt like people were watching me. I freaked myself out and woke up.

I was in a tight glass cage in someone's room. Someone was staring at me like this:

I was banging on the glass trying to get out, and more people kept crowding around the cage, with the same intense face...

First Dream I'm in a baseball stadium, sitting high up in the nosebleeds. I'm not watching the game and I'm not even aware if there's anything going on in the arena. My attention is on the rowdy fans around me. Some are yelling and arguing. Eventually, fights start to break out. I've had enough of the pushy natures and left.

Second Dream I feel like I'm outside of the parking lot of the baseball stadium. But it's nightfall whereas the first dream took place during the day. There is a man, presumably my manager. There are other coworkers around me and our manager is busting a vein, completely chewing us out and telling us that we're worthless and threatens to fire us (for whatever job, I don't know). One woman in particular is an anime character, Celty from Durarara. He's picking on her the most. She begins to cry and I won’t stand for that.

I take her by the hand and lead her away from the scene. She's still very upset, so I suggest that we should drive off someplace where we can gather ourselves and feel better. We do. I'm riding on a motorcycle opposite to hers, and she texts me "Thank you, that was very nice of you." (she communicates via text) I laugh and tell her with my thoughts that it was okay. She's surprised and amazed by this. Celty asks how I can communicate with her through our thoughts, I reply that I'm lucid dreaming and I can do anything. When I think this, I ride faster and faster until I cannot see her beside me.

Third Dream I'm revisiting a haunted house I used to work at. The owners greeted me and showed me to the entrance so I could have a peek at this year’s new look. I'm appalled to see that the price of entry was $26! I refused to pay and the new workers are offended by this. The owners kindly show me in anyway without me spending a dime and I'm suddenly with an old friend that I used to have romantic feelings for. She's scared and clings to me, holding my hand while walking through the maze. One actor wearing a wolf mask greets me from behind and presses the muzzle of the snout against the back of my neck. It wasn’t a scary gesture at all. I shivered so violently and pleasantly that it almost wakes me. I shake that feeling of waking off and continue to walk with my friend.

There is a fork in the road of the maze. We chose the left side and it becomes a scavenger hunt. We have to find a ruby in each room we enter. It isn't very scary. The rooms are relatively normal and even cute. But my friend is more frightened than ever and that made me nervous. We were careful in the first two rooms, checking to see if there were monsters or anything of the sort that would hurt us, but there weren't any. I was relieved when we reached the last room. It looked like a fifteen year old girl's bedroom. It was painted red and white and pink. There were stuffed animals and heart plush toys everywhere.

My friend found the last ruby beneath the bed in the room and she silenced a scream when she looked back in the last room we came from. Inside there was a sleeping giant. It was so enormous I could only see its legs. When I told her that we had to creep out quietly, I felt a very sharp bristly gnawing sensation cuffed around my left ankle. Beneath the bed where my friend took the ruby, something was trying to pull me under with it. We both screamed and I woke.

Thoughts and Stuff When I woke up, I realized that my left ankle was scratching against the edge of my bed. It really freaked me out. It felt like the dream was still happening. And as calm as I was at first in the last dream, it really felt nightmarish. I'm not sure why. If you would like to share some insight, feel free.

Deleted

Holy cow. I feel like I've remembered over 4 dreams today, but I can't remember them
4 months ago, I had a nasty abscess below my right ear. It had to be cut open. After the surgery, the doctors told me that after the wound had healed I would have to go and get another surgery, but this time removing the whole thing. This dream is closely related to the fact that I'm nervous about the upcoming surgery. Alright, let's begin. I'm in my olds schools nurses office. The lighting was dim, and the room had red curtains, so the room was dark and red. There were two people in the room. My family doctor and my aunt, who works in the hospital, but isn't a doctor. I was very nervous and asked them whether they would have to give me full Analgesia (spelling?) or just around my ear (which they did in real life, but this surgery is more serious). I don't remember what they said. I layed in a dentist chair and waited for the surgery to begin.
My stood next to me and reached for my ear, holding a needle. I nearly panicked, but the needle didn't even touch my face. I then get up from the the chair and sit on a hair in the corner of the room. My aunt sit next to me, holding a needle. It looked like a normal needle. I asked her why the needle was so thick. Instead of calming me, like she usually does in real life, she said to me: :"Yes, it is thick, and painful".
Everything went black, I woke up, my eyes were wide open and I was taking very deep breaths. I didn' even bother to try to WILD, DEILD or do anything else.
Writing this, I realised that what I dreamt was a nightmare. Thank You apple juice...

1) Holding a girl in my arms.

2) LUCID. Tell the three people I'm with (I assume they're DCs. At least one is a middle-aged man.) that this is a dream, and I walk past them and call for my guides. They walk through three doorways ahead of me but I wake up.

3) Something... Death related maybe?

Hello DV community, this is a story of a recurring nightmare that occurred over time when I was young. First I'll set out the background.

I watched Teletubbies growing up. Those round, TV bellied, aerial-on-head gods were the greatest thing in my childhood. I had the toys, the videos and I watched it every time possible. And one day, they showed and episode that stopped me watching Teletubbies. The Lion and Bear. If you Google "Teletubbies the lion and bear" you will find the controversial clip. There was a Lion, that chased this bear, roared so loud that the clouds moved and trees shook. The Teletubbies were scared. So who else was scared? You got it, their number one fan.

The dream began with me on my bedroom floor. In reality, I wasn't far from the bed, but it felt like miles. I got up. My legs were weak, and they shook. Then I heard a growl I heard watching TV a few hours earlier. The world shook. Through my bedroom door came the Lion. (Somewhere in my subconscious I knew it's name was simply "Lion", not "The Lion") It came towards me at high speed. My room wasn't big, but images of the lion chasing the bear flashed in my mind. My heart raced. I couldn't talk. It hit me.

I woke up, and ran through to my parents room.

So, as I said, this dream was recurring. From then on I just curled up into a ball and never moved. But I couldn't wake myself up. Eventually my curiosity took over. I stood, and was mauled down again. These passed after some time. There was another dream involving Lion that occurred once, however.

It began with a false awakening. I went downstairs, and at the table were two babushka dolls the size of people. I knew they were my mum and dad. Lion appeared. This was some time after the recurring dreams, I felt like I had some power over him. I pleaded for him to change them back, but he roared, and spoke. I had to make a promise to them.

I looked at the doll that was my mum. I promised her that I would always do baking with her. (Baking cakes was a common thing she did, and offered me the opportunity to help but I always turned it down). I looked at my dad, who, at that time I wasn't exactly closest family with. I loved him, and he was my dad, but it just didn't feel right. So I looked at the corresponding doll and promised I'd always hug him. They changed, and I awoke. I lay in bed for some time thinking about that dream, but then I went to sleep.

I think that last one may have been helpful... as I've always tried to help bake stuff and spend time with my dad. The babushka dolls probably appeared because my uncle had one but I thought it was creepy.

Thanks for taking the time to read my first entry!

Dream 1

I was talking to my mum in my house. I went upstairs but then I realised I had a spider on my chest. I got scared and jumped down the stairs to tell my mum to get it off. I'm not proud of that dream at all.

It was just on my chest and I couldn't see it as it was crawing up. Then I woke up.

Dream 2

I was at a nice restaurant with two girls one of which I was dating and the other was her friend. The one I was dating was very quiet and the other was talking al lot (I think). The loud one looked like Sandra Bullock. I figured if my dates not going to do anything then forget it. So I asked her "Hey you wanna have sex?"

And she said "Oh yes!" We went to the toilet and got busy. Then I left on a train.

Dream 2: This was set in the True Blood world. I was an observer (not sure if I was even "there", more like I was watching things unfold from above.) at this vampire party celebrating a major holiday... not sure which Holiday but I think it was New Years. These two vampires are there, one tall woman in red and one shorter one I can't remember. They was stuff that happened with them I can't recall. Later in the night they bring back Lafayette, a character in the show. He doesn't know everyone there is a vampire, he's basically at the door talking how awesome the party will be in his stereotypical way. When no one responds he points to the vamp on the left, which happens to be tall-woman-in-red, and said she paid him a lot of money (he said the exact amount but I can't remember it) to come. The head of the club is pleased with this because they know Lafayette is afraid of vampires and they wanted to mentally torture him some.

I can't remember what happened after that, but obviously it wasn't good. So fastforward to what I do remember, and Tara (character on the show) and I are trying to escape an unknown vampire and his progeny who looks/acts suspiciously like Talbot, who's also a character from the show. We're looking for silver chains; I pull off this black chain from somewhere (I was familiar with the place in the dream but can't remember what it looked like now, other than it had a convenient amount of chains everywhere) but it was plastic. So I pull off -another- one that turns out to be metal. Tara and I both grab chains, she goes and hides upstairs somewhere. I end up hiding behind a chair, but I'm scared to death because it isn't a good hiding place and I know Talbot look-alike is going to see me. He does, comes over to pick me up and start talking to me.

At this point, I'm Lafayette. This scene is confusing to remember because I can't remember if I was Lafayette the entire time after the capture or if I was just me and occasionally Lafayette. -Anyway,- I "confess" to him that I want to become a vampire because I'm tired of being bullied by vampires. I know Tara is probably thinking I'm lying, but I'm kind of serious. He says something or other about humans and their place, I can't remember what, but basically it was an emotionally intimate conversation. I reminded him that he used to be human and scared or something of that-sort. During this conversation Tara's sneaking up behind him.

Tara does -something-, I forgot what, but next thing you know he's in the chair I was hiding behind and losing consciousness. I wrap the silver chain around his neck, and Tara stabs him with a pointy stake-looking thing that looks like one of those pointy things on the end of lights and stuff that you stick outside. Tara can't stab him in his heart for some reason, and she starts to leave and I'm like, "He isn't dead yet!" I keep urging her to kill him, but she can't bring herself to do it. I grab the stake and start stabbing at his heart, I can't find it then some random voice (maybe it was her?) talks to me about how he has two "lifeforce" points and a little digital map appears with blue lines pointing to them. He screams something along the lines of "Noooo!" as I'm about to stab him there, then he turns into vampire goo.

Unknown-powerful-vampire started descending the stairs moments before this, and although he seemed momentarily distracted Tara and I both knew we were in big trouble and were probably going to die there since that vampire was too powerful for us. That's all I remember.

Dream 1: This dream was split into two dreams; both about my girlfriend. One had a happy ending and the other a sad ending, but unfortunately I can't remember the happy ending or much of what happened in between the endings. What I do remember is T's father passed away, she was crying a lot over it and I was trying to comfort her. Then a few days later, she's in the street crying really hard about something and gets hit by a bus. I see this happen, run up to her and ask if she wants me to call 911. She says no (and dream-me listens for some reason lol) and then tells me that she's upset because she did the math and her relationship with her ex Allison (who doesn't exist in real-life) overlaps with her relationship with me. So I'm asking her questions as she's walking to get this scrapbook type thing. She shows it to me, and it has various dates and what-not and events that happened and how she felt about them written in it. It basically looks like one of those calendars you can write stuff in in a planner. Most of it's in red. So she's flipping through this to show me, and I wake up.