non-lucid

Only one dream from last night but it's certainly one of the craziest I've ever had!

Okay so I had the animated scooby doo by my side, the 3D animated one and I had to hide him from the cartoon one that was coming through a portal in a forest not too far away. We were both in this fairly open square tent and we both bolted for the open trying to get away. We both rushed through an open and very busy morning market. With blue sky above us and castle not too far off we clearly weren't in 2013. Nevertheless I glanced backwards to see if the cartoon one was behind us to see the scene switch as quick as a lightning strike. Suddenly I was in the middle of a cross-fire, not of real bullets though; nerf pellets. I instinctively ducked and looked around, as I did so the scene flicked back and I was racing through the market once more. Not giving a care to what had just happened we both raced into one market stall at the top of a grassy hill. Now I think back to it, it all felt so real and nice to have the sun on my back, blue sky and very colourful green grass. I looked around and once more the scene changed like a light coming on. This time people looked like they were in some kind of restaurant, however they were testing their nerf guns, making sure they loaded and fired properly, like they were preparing for an assault.

Looking back around I was no longer at the market, I was in a comfortable room and it was nighttime. I then heard a knocking on the window, it was my very small college friend Kathleen. She'd done something very bad and got kicked out of her house and needed somewhere to stay. Me being the kind person I am I lifted her through the window and into 'my room'. Not long after we were both watching tv on a large bean bag and all of a sudden she started feeling me up! O.o I look to my left and my girlfriend is sat right there! She didn't respond and I was shocked at what was happening. Then the dream ended.

i am in a house with M., S. and A. the house is located in a clearing in a coniferous forest. the scene is generally dark. the house has wood floors and a warm colour scheme.

then my friends and i are in my elementary school gymnasium. we are playing a game in which the goal is to guess what the other person is thinking of. the theme in this round is fetishes. i come up with an idea which turns into an entire dream scene:
this scene is in the style of a documentary and it is presented by a man whose appearance and mannerisms recall louis theroux. several muscular men wearing leather bdsm outfits sre gathered together in a field. on the edge of the field stand rows of huge metal bows (about twice the height of a person) which are anchored to the ground. "louis" interviews one of the men who tells him that this is a fetish. participants obtain satisfaction by being fired from the bow as if they were an arrow. louis chooses to undergo this process. an arrowhead attached to a short length of shaft is glued onto his forehead and he is placed into some kind of leather bondage contraption which keeps his legs together and his arms at his sides. the man pulls the bow back, releases it and louis flies straight through the air.
afterwards we are in a classroom with the lights off. some blue-white light filters through the window. we are discussing sexuality with a teacher figure who is male and in his mid-20s.

the scene returns to my elementary gymnasium but now there is a war going on. the tile floor has become bumpy and ragged, unevenly painted with blue, yellow and green stripes. i am talking to a tall, thin man in a suit who has unruly black hair about the war. i understand this man is jean-paul sartre. sartre complains that another writer's books are racist and colonialist and tosses them onto the ground.

next i am inside some kind of professional building with wooden doors and blue glass walls. a man is advertising his book on quantum physics. the cover photo of the book is a ripple in multicoloured liquid. i open the book. there is a grid on one page and each cell contains a line drawing of a person. on the opposite page the author derides all of these people, complaining that the men are "assholes" and the women are "sluts". on another page, there is a large circle labeled "A" to the left of a small circle labeled "B". the book describes how the larger circle represents the immediate effects of a quantum process while the smaller circle represents the other effects. the example he uses to elucidate this theory is that if you consumed lead atoms, you would experience mild symptoms immediately, while the rest of your family would become severely ill and mentally retarded but this would occur over a long course of time. (that's dream logic for you). when these two circles intersect, they supposedly create a ripple pattern.

finally I am wandering through the hallways of my elementary school. they actually look more like the hallways on the 3rd floor of the hospital but in the dream i believe it is school. the walls, floor and ceiling are flat white. the hallways are very narrow and take strange zig-zag courses, which is disorienting. someone tells me that there is a fire in the school. i am not concerned until i see brushed metal cylindrical objects careening through the hallways and spraying water, ostensibly to fight the fire. these 'robots' frighten me slightly.

Meeting of an old friend.
In this dream i wasnt very lucid but very memorable.
I was walking in georgetown with Matt, and we decide to walk into a headshop where i think it was village arts and crafts but different inside.
Then i see a different Matt from freshman and sophomore year. I went up to him and hugged him and told him its been a while since ive seen him.
He looked really stoned and i new he was stoned which made me happy.
Then he told me that i can get 1 thing that i wanted from the shop because he worked there.
i looked around, i saw pipes and grinders. But then i decided to get TNT, small white seeds in a ball of paper that pop when you throw it.

Dream 1:
It’s common for SSILD to cause a false awakening but I never expected it. I thought I was awake and my brother came in shouting: “It’s 4 o’clock!” I thought nothing of it, because I wouldn't be surprised if I slept until 4pm. I will do a reality check next time it happens.

Dream 2:
I came remember A LOT more from this dream, even though the order of the events are jumbled up a bit, it still makes sense… somewhat.

I was in Fiona McKevitt’s (daughter of my old babysitter) house. I’m pretty sure it was her house, but it looked nothing like it; it was a completely different house! In a way it reminded me of a furniture store. But everything was too similar and the room was too small for it to be that. It was odd that the chairs were the same as the old ones we had years ago (like 7 years…), I should have picked up on this and made myself lucid. I have feeling the material changed the second time I visited (I visited each location twice) but anyway my dad sat on the couch closest to the TV (directly opposite it). In a way he didn’t look happy but didn’t seem angry.

There was also sex in my dream (this is a dream sign – I should have realised!) There was a singer – who doesn't actually exist – that had a very provocative music video. It was basically him crouching down in a white background with a hard on and his back tilted down towards the floor with his hands supporting him. He looked like he came from a tanned racial background, and had a Hawaiian necklace if I remember correctly. I remember there was two boys that came up from the bottom left and right and put his his... junk in their mouth. They were basically just licking it while looking at the camera.

I was also on a bus; it was like the school bus but it wasn't. There was a boy who sat in front of me and he showed me a sexy video (it could have well been that music video). I laughed and handed his phone back to him through the side of the seat.

Like each other location I visited the bus twice, the second I was on the opposite side of the bus – front seat. I noticed my REAL SCHOOL BUS coming over the hill, and it was a narrow road. I couldn’t see anyone inside in the bus (but not in a spooky way). I was desperately putting my seat belt on in a panic. And as the bus came closer it stopped suddenly and my bus driver was calm. The fact it stopped so suddenly was unusual, should have made me notice something was up. Next thing I knew, instead of one of the buses reversing – they drove around the side of each other! The road was only wide enough for one bus! But still just like an non-solid object you could walk through, the drove past the sides of each other.

I was gasping while shouting at Donal (boy in my school that gets my bus), “Did you see that!?”

He was calm about it and was actually laughing because I was frantically putting my seat belt on earlier… that made me embarrassed.

I also remember sitting on my bed half asleep looking out the side and that teen boy that showed me the dirty video earlier was there and he did something sexy and I said something dirty back – not sure what.

The last and final thing I can remember from this morning was Bradley Dixon (an teen boy I was going after months ago) and he posted on gay teen chat sire I know: “so desperate from Newry Chat.”

But the thing is that Newry Chat was a website I owned and shut down 2 years ago. Why would my dream bring that up?

END OF DREAM MEMORY.

Total Sleep time: 8+hrs

Dream recall method: Dr1- noted sentences; Dr2-Dr7 – none

Other: I was feeling very sleepy and tired; there are some gaps in my memory, some fragments re-emerged later.

After HI and falling asleep: I noticed something after briefly waking in the first hours of sleep; now all I am left with is the vague memory; was it dream talking again?

Dream1: We are waiting for the tram, most of my DC friends are dressed officially, but I wear some casual clothes. I am slightly worried about that, but they say “I wish I had your attitude towards life”, “Yeah, but sometimes I feel afraid from all those things I know”, I reply. [I wish I knew what I know, but perhaps it’s better I don’t]

Fragment2: I see the beach, initially I want to go for a swim, but the waves are quite big so I decide against it. My mom is also there.

Fragment3: Looking for a place to hide from two DC women. This is some kind of back stage for something like a theatre, I hope they won’t be looking for me there.

Fragment4: Some posts on DV.

Fragment5: We ran out of toilet paper.



I try WBTB. This time I tell myself, I would be less sleepy and more concentrated. I spend some time in bed awake, concentrating on my body and some sounds from the neighbors, then I quickly transition into the dream.

Dream6[Low Quality Lucid]: I find myself in a familiar room, something like my boyfriend is also there. I know that I am dreaming and I do not bother to RC. I am absolutely passive, just being in the room, I feel as if I am drunk, so heavy. I am sitting on a chair doing absolutely nothing, noticing my behaviour and somewhat annoyed of this but also so tired. This DC is sitting next to me. I take some time to examine him, he looks a lot like my boyfriend, yet I know that’s not him. I find him rather unpleasant. Everything is so stable, and I feel as if I have been sitting there forever, exchanging some random thoughts with this fake bf. I tell him that this is a dream, and he repeats a few times “lucid dreaming”, that’s the only thing that amuses me. I don’t like being there at all…

Dream7, DEILD: I awake for a short while, rather unconscious, open my eyes, rollover and then I enter the dream again. I am thinking “Oh, I DEILDed”, but I really did not mean to do that. I find it strange that I am still there. I feel so tired. I finally remember that what I want to do is change the scene, just imagine a scene, I remind myself. Nope, does not work. Then I see some kind of a poster with some beach and palms and try to concentrate on it… The dream does not fade...memory gap, I think I fall into unconsciousness again...



Dream8: I am with my parents, in some a tourist village near the sea. I want to buy something, so we are looking for the right store. Then I check what money I have with me, I have stamps, which are some kind of certificate serving as money? By the time we get to the store, all the shops are closed. I don’t care that much, but my parents are disappointed that I couldn’t buy anything.

I was overeating at an all you can eat buffet. My dad was there, and I knew somehow that he was reprimanding me about eating with serving utensils, but what he actually said was something about penguins (?)

What I think this dream is about is that at times I am so hard on myself that I interpret comments of others (such as my dad in this dream) as being critical of me because I am critical of me whereas in reality I may be reading something into their comments that was not there after all. He commented about penguins, and I interpretted it as a criticism of my table manners. I got to watch out for that.

Dream recall from today's naps.

Nap #1:

I was attempting WILD and the room was different, but it was normal for my dream self, after attempt i managed to randomly recall a fragment, which is most likely from previous dream, then i went through some rooms and different clocks were showing different time, later some family members decided to help me with WILDing for some reason and as i closed i saw moderator panel of some forum.

Recalled fragment: Some grey/rusty indoors area.

Nap #2:

I was apparently some character from The Simpsons and i was eating alot of candies.

First of all this was a dream about my current work, and it was about collaboration with an external organization which we really are collaborating with. This was a REM dream with fairly vivid visuals and fairly lengthy. It mentioned reasons why we would continue to collaborate unless some other reasons occurred. I do don't right now remember these reasons. I did not notice anything in this dream which was not fairly realistic like in real life, except that I do not remember a strong awareness or strong presence and consciousness of myself - more like a movie.

I'm at some random place with HER, and she grabs me and we both fall to the floor. She's still holding me, like a bomb is about to explode, and I don't fight back. In fact, I enjoy the makeshift embrace and tell her "there's no way I'll fight this". At the moment there's an argument going on between two people, and I really don't think much of it.


We're on the ground, and I'm looking at things develop. One guy is yelling at another guy, and I have that "I wish I knew what was going on, because I would step in and knock someone out".....and just like that....the other guy shot him. He's yelling at everyone...pointing the gun all over the place, and I think I"m about to get shot. I closed my eyes, and got right with GOD. When I opened them, everyone was scattering around like roaches. He held the gun to his head and shot him self. Blood was everywhere. At that moment I didn't feel like the bad ass I was trying to be. I saw his soul outside of him for a second and vanish.....


recall gets sloppy but I do remember sitting someplace with a dead body by my legs.....


Later on, I'm on a bus. Someone behind me is jabbing me in the ass with the end of a pencil. It happened two times, and i grabbed the pencil and broke it in two. On the third time, I turned around after breaking the pencil in his face and said "do you want me to kill you and myself like the last guy did"....and the girl he was with sat next to me.


She mounted me. She was wearing a spider web pattern shirt that had hole in it. Underneath I could see her tits, and my zipper was down. I'm pretty sure she knew I was erect, and I knew I could see her nipples. She did something in some sort of way that made her have a black top underneath the spiderweb. I was really waiting for her to flip out after seeing all of me...but maybe she just didn't care or notice.

In this dream, I was staying at a hotel with my family because we had to move. There was a water park nearby and my daughter had gone to it. I was in the room and realized my birds were there, loose and without their cages. I had to go back to our house to get the cages for them. I kept going in and out of the room and each time I went back I would start up the wrong way and a obese teenager boy was sitting on stairs blocking one way so I kept apologizing and going back the right way. I got the keys and went to leave. I went to the water park to find my daughter but then the dream changed somehow. It was winter time and I was walking through very deep snow over a lake. There were large icy tubes that people were going down kind of like luges. My brother was there with another person, I guess it was my daughter and they were going around these luges. I went to leave and got trapped because I found myself on a lake that was melting. I was afraid to walk across the ice, I didn't want to fall in.
The dream changed again and I was at a friends house, I didn't know this person, she was like an internet friend or something. I was staying with her in her home/motel. I was admiring her kitchen and how much counter space she had. She was going to take me to see her horses so we started walking on this trail back through the snow and next thing I know I was on a bridge and then the whole thing began moving. It was attached to a boat and we were going across a lake. It was sunset and very beautiful. I had my camera and was taking pictures. All of a sudden a plane came in like it was going to land nearby and then disappeared from view. Then a few seconds later another plane came, it was a jumbo jet. The kind with the large hump on the front of the plane. It was white with zigzag red stripes on it. No letters or numbers. It came in and then arced back up and around and came around and flipped over. I yelled that the plane was crashing. It came in and I could see it was plowing up snow before it crashed. There was a huge fireball but no I took my camera out and was trying to make a video and I couldn't get it on the right setting. The person that was driving the boat called 911 and reported the crash, the person that answered said they knew about it. We told them we saw it happen so I was trying to tell them exactly what happened and then found I couldn't talk. I was able to talk by speaking one word at a time. It was then I woke up. The dream really shook me up by how real it was.

Dream 1(fragment):

I was watching dino crisis 2 let's play.

Dream 2(fragment):

I was browsing dreamviews, there was some thread about how false awakenings affect dream recall and also i was apparently posting that 'I just had a lucid dream'(?).

Friday, 4/12/13

I woke up at 6:30 am and went back for a nap at 8am.

I was going to WILD, but for some reason, I didn't get any indication of it.

Turned to my left side and fell asleep. When I woke up, I was sure I had a DILD, but didn't get uo, went back to sleep. Next time I woke up, I wasn't so sure about DILD anymore. Until I started to write down snippets. I was trying to recall, if I got any surprise or happiness when I realized I'm lucid, but I didn't remember any. Until now. Now I clearly remember telling someone "ok, I'll count my fingers, but it's pointless, I'm not dreaming". Then I counted 6-7 fingers on my left hand. I was completely surprised. I counted again and again, in awe, showing someone how many fingers I have. So DILD is confirmed.

Snippets for DILD and non-lucids mixed in my memory:

- I walked into my parents house. My dad had my mom's haircut and he was blond. With thin wire glasses. (just now I realized, he resembled the russian spy from The Americans show in his blond wig). My room looked the same way I had it when I was a child. I discovered, that my closet is haunted.

- My brother with his wife and child are visiting. I want to know when they leave, so I can go out and come back before they leave.

- I'm flying in controlled flight. Happy.

- I'm taking a cab home. 2 other passengers. We go by my house and I want to get out, but cabbie says it has to be in order we got in. So we go to two other places first. I decide not to give him a tip.

- I walk into a room and it's an interrogation room. A guy is behind a desk. (I was watching the show Revolution before bed)

- I'm escaping through the roof, but each time I break through a layer, there is another, different one behind it.

- I'm diving into a lake, wanting to swim in tropical sea. Water is dark and dirty, like a polluted river. I'm trying to make it brighter and it's getting brighter and I'm starting to see gravel on the bottom.

I suspect there was more, but don't remember it.

so, yesterday i decided to use a bracelet that i always wear as a kind of RC. i wrote some numbers on it figuring they wouldn't show up right in the dream. unfortunately it didn't quite work out - i think my mind has turned that particular number combination into a picture, therefore defeating the number test. i did, however, manage to bring the bracelet into two separate dreams (at least - all i could remember) and actually had a 'wait a moment' and did a RC with my bracelet (even if i did fail). plan on still using the bracelet, but imagining something else on it/reminder to do *other* RCs. also trying to be more aware in daily life. ADA. used to meditate a lot, so not that unfamiliar with the process, just out of practice. also, found myself naturally waking up ~4-4.5 hours after going to sleep - around 12/1230am. wasn't sure if that would be the case considering my wacky sleep pattern (i'm trying to force it to normalize yet again).

My partner was out for the night and I fell asleep on the sofa.
I'd done something wrong, although I don't recall what, I was on a boat of some sorts, maybe even a submarine, all of the doors where the rounded type and the walls and floors were metal studded in design. As I walked up a flight of stairs, I noticed a room in front of me with the door open, inside I could see a girl getting ready, she was naked though she made no attempt to cover herself and was completely at ease with her nakedness. As she began talking to me, a guy I hadn't noticed lying on the bed made himself known and it was apparent that he did take offence at her nakedness, what with me being there and all, an argument ensued. At some point during the argument, Martin Ribey, Bri Newby and a group of younger lads from around town came along and took hold of me, apparently I was to be punished for what I'd done - even though I still didn't know what - and they proceeded to hold me down. They put me in a seated position on the floor with one of them holding my arms behind my back from behind. Martin had gone off to gain more evidence and proof of what I'd done and we sat there and waited. By the time he returned, the rest of the group were getting impatient and wanted to give me a kicking. One of the younger lads was getting in my face and preparing to hit me, I was still being restrained and so I said "You're not even going to let me fight like a man then.?" There were like 6 - 8 of them in total, so I guess they figured I had no chance and decided to let me fight. As I was released and stood up, I grabbed the angry lads hair and started to kick him in the face, I had steelies on and so it wasn't pretty, seeing this Martin made a move towards me and so I kicked him in the balls, he doubled over, as he did so I grabbed his hair also and then started to smash both of their faces of each others. Seeing this feat of amazing self defence, the rest of the group turned their tails and beat a swift retreat. I let go of the younger lad as I knew Martin was the one I needed to worry about. We continued to fight until I had him on the floor and was sat on his chest. At this point, he turned into a praying mantis - I know right - and so I started to punch him in one of his eyes until it exploded at which point my partner returned home and woke me.

We had a cup of tea and a fag, then went to bed around 4.30, she got in at around 3am and so I figured an attempt at WBTB wouldn't be a bad idea apart from the fact I'd interacted with her quite a bit, although I was still tired and sleepy, anyhoo, I dreamt about Diesel and Dutchess, I was out walking with them and we went to the shops. For some reason there were a lot of people there from a circus and all had different animals with them, there was a guy with tigers, I saw a rhino and an elephant, the types you'd expect to see, Dutchess was in her element and all of a sudden she ran off barking after a stoat. It jumped into the water and Dutchess wont go in deep water, at this point I noticed a man swimming with dolphins and I knew that if I slapped the water or knocked on the bank, they might come over to me, so I started to slap the water, it felt awkward and so I began knocking on the bank instead, as I'd thought, one of the dolphins came over, the weirdest thing is, it was like I was blind and I couldn't see the dolphin, no matter how I tried, I could feel the texture of it's skin and even felt it's tongue, but try as I might, I couldn't see it. I tied the dogs up with a kindly old man who said he's be happy to watch them for me and I went into the shops. I woke up proper at 8am.

I was at some sort of music festival, behind the stage, OUTSIDE of the festival grounds. There was a full crowd in front of the stage, but I couldn't get in due to a chain link fence with a barbed-wire top. My Chemical Romance were on the stage, and started their set with Famous Last Words. I was rocking out behind the stage, as I could faintly see them. One guy in the crowd noticed I was glancing around for a way in, and he called me over. He handed me a ticket through the fence. I started making my way around the fence toward the front to the entrance, rocking out to MCR the whole way there.

...That is all I remember.