Side Notes
Non-dream stuff: Just some non-lucid fragments; initially tried to force recall, which I know not to do, so I quickly stopped trying to remember hard and got up and made tea. Fragment 1: I remember being outdoors, and this was near the end of a dream sequence; there was grass and a dirt path, and along the dirt path was a concrete cylindrical shape jutting out, it was a sewer entrance, as it had a massive brown-looking lid on top. I was showing it to someone, I think my partner, and said something like "... and this is where we went in.", in reference to something that happened before in the dream. I remember it might have been day time but it was dark, I think the weather was overcast. Fragment 2: I remember yeast, of the same type used in baking; I remember seeing it, but that's about it. Fragment 3: I remember being in a dropship of some kind. I think this fragment was actually from before Fragment 1. Notes: The sewer lid and concrete structure were reminiscent of what they're like in my native country.,The first dream sequence was actually very long, but I managed to forget most of it somehow. I think my intention to make note of dreams in the morning is being neglected, i.e. I need to start setting this intention before bed.
Night of July 19, 2018. Thursday. Now I will move on to more specific patterns relating to the nature of the dream state. Having held such a keen interest since early childhood, and never losing that focus, I find it virtually impossible to make much sense out of most sources implying they are about dreams. Even much content on lucid dreaming does not correlate with anything I have ever experienced. People who have never studied dreams (especially for a lifetime, as I have), or experienced them through every sleep cycle at various levels of liminality and lucidity, and continuously validated reactive representation in the dream state (thus being aware what dreams are actually doing), have no credibility in trying to convince people that their beliefs mean anything. They have no business even writing about them any more than if I knew nothing about cars (other than perhaps what I gleaned from “Archie” comic books) but wrote a book about them (and, since many people know a lot about cars, imagine their reaction). Still, the purpose of this series is not to address such fallacy but to review the nature of the waking process and the various forms of the emerging consciousness and to what extent it can be monitored and understood. Lucidity, liminality, and subliminal focus vary from dream to dream. Ultimately, it is unlikely for someone to establish full control of ultradian rhythm, as it seems to be affected by diet and amount of exercise. (The WBTB or Wake Bake To Bed method results in disruption of ultradian rhythm but most people who practice it misunderstand this.) I always strive to make the best of what I have. What habits did I have regarding the dreaming process as I grew up? A habit I have had since I was very young is the “lighting a candle” metaphor in coming out of an uncertain state of semi-consciousness. That eventually resulted in vivid semi-lucid dreams such as the one where I used lightning to set a tall church belfry afire. Some people like to talk about symbolism in dreams but fail to discern the incidental visual associations. I have always been fascinated by hypnagogia as well, where forms continuously transform based on visual similarity, even when I am at least partly monitoring the state. Hundreds of different unrelated images occur in only a short time. What are some other metaphors (in addition to the “lighting a candle” focus) of the waking process that I deliberately established very early in life? The most obvious and consistent was the opening of a door. This intent always had two results, either vivifying my dream, sometimes exponentially in ways that defy belief, other times merely serving to wake me. These two potentials are always understood while in the dream state whether or not I am lucid, probably because they operate this way in real life. For example, if I want to “escape,” I create a door or doorway and use it as such. If I want to vivify my dream or create a different scenario, I create a door (though sometimes slide an entire wall as if it was a sliding door). It does not even have to be a typical door. For example, in my “Old Shack” dreams, I created and used the abandoned ruins of a rose trellis arched gateway as a doorway back into waking life (to escape from a pterodactyl, which simultaneously transformed into a falling sparrow - events such as this helped me understand more about reactive representation in the dream state). Another form of reactive representation I created very early in my life was the bridge metaphor. That goes back so far that my mother used to tell me how I relayed this about dreams when I was a toddler. As with doors, I used bridges either to “escape” a dream scenario or to find my way to a different one. Sometimes such associations became mixed. For example, I would open a door inside my house and then see the ocean, as if the hallway was a bridge of sorts (which makes sense, as both represent routes of focus). I would jump from a bridge and land upon a stack of windows. The list goes on. While there is not that much that can go wrong with a door, bridges can collapse or sink into the water. Staircases and elevators can serve as viable dream state mediation but can go wrong as well. As with cars, elevators are sometimes too small to get inside. They sometimes drop to the floors below before I can enter them. They are also more of a projection of illusory physicality (vestibular system correlation) than as with a bridge or door. Ultimately, it is up to the dreamer to decide which reactive representation of RAS mediation and modulation serves them in the most viable way. Once the foundation is made and understood, it is unlikely to change. Some people choose to give themselves nightmares or erratic dreams. They may ignore beneficial transpersonal factors as if the interconsciousness does not exist to them. (As an analogy, they might not even have any grasp of why forest ecosystems work or why the food chain is at it is. They might invent a magical process to “interpret” such systems.) Others have learned what the dream state is and how to make the best of it. Readability score: 57.
Completely non-dream stuff: Just making a little note here, to remind myself that the past couple of nights I haven't been able to recall my dreams, for no particular apparent reason, other than the fact that my sleep is naturally poor. Last night I compromised with my partner and made the radio stop coming on in the morning and I turn it back on for him after I've gotten up from bed (it's helpful for him to wake up). So we will see if this helps improve dream recall, as the voices from the radio were quickly making me forget details on some mornings, if it wasn't quiet enough. However, over the last few days, since I've started keeping this DJ and reading the dreams of others, I have started to remember to do RCs in waking life more often, so that's a positive.
Non-dream stuff: I woke up at 8 with the auto radio which was a little too loud, got up and turned it off, as I wanted to but also because my partner asked me to; Got back in bed and forgot any potential dream recall - stayed in bed for 40 minutes and had a small dream fragment even though I wasn't quite asleep; I knotted two fingers and went and start tea for myself and my partner, coming back up to start drafting this text and then going back down to finish the tea and bring it up, at which point I remembered the second dream fragment. Fragment 1: We were in my parent's house and my partner was in the bedroom that used to be my parents (but in waking life these days that bedroom is rented out). I remember seeing him get dressed. I was at the entry hall and looking into my old bedroom (again, rented out in waking life now), suddenly a I see a landline phone (the one that's right here in this room in waking life) is receiving a call, we don't answer and a message is left and plays out from the answering machine "What the hell ya playing at mate? You can't do this!". I knew the voice but the first name and last name initials were detected by the answering machine; it was my partner's sibling's partner (sorry for the confusion) whom we will just call DF. I could see my partner's face go sort of "uugh not this" and I was thinking to myself "what the hell was DF on about". My partner came through and we went into my old bedroom with the landline phone and I remember we commented on it to each other, but can't remember words in detail. We walked into the balcony that is outside my bedroom and I could feel some annoyance off my partner. It was day, probably mid/late morning, given the sun's position. The dream ended here, more or less. Fragment 2: I was playing WoW, my view being from the character perspective mostly, on a Shaman character of mine I think, and was doing this old raid by myself called Molten Core. That's kind of all I remember. Some notes: Though Fragment 1 wasn't a nightmare or a bad dream, it could have turned into a bad dream if I got too hot in my real bed; this is very typical if I get too hot in bed, which I was starting to.DF doesn't know our landline number, so he wouldn't be able to call it. My partner's sibling probably doesn't know it either. I should have questioned things a bit.In the dream, and on waking, I knew the call was in reference to giving them some furniture that we haven't given them yet. The fact that DF was having this reaction over something this small was a confirmation of a bad set of behaviours DF has.There seemed to be noone else at the house, not even my dog (who lives with my parents).Even though I could see my partner get dressed and go "ugh", this was not through direct vision. This was camera-like perception, as from the entry hall I could not directly see my partner, but I could directly see the landline. This could have been a good prompt for a RC.Given the general feeling of temperature and humidity in the air (given by the sunlight through the air), I'd say the dream actually took place in Spring, as things looked too green and it wasn't excessively hot. Again this could have been a good prompt for a RC but a more prominent dream sign is that we were in my native country at all, which won't happen for some months.The WoW dream fragment was one of the ones from when I woke up at 8, and I remember very little other than killing some bosses and getting the usual loot. Being so "inside" the game is a dream sign that I typically forget to think on during dreams. See my general notes.It is also worth noting for readers that when I make references to my parent's house to keep in mind that it's actually a flat in a 9 story-building. 10, if you count ground floor.
This has happened to me on several occasions now. I can dream while 100% awake and walking around. All that's needed is being tired enough. These episodes only last maybe two seconds, but enough for a random image, thought or sound to manifest. If there was ever a case for 'time compression' in dreams, it's this. On one occasion, I saw people through my closed eyelids because I took a little bit too long to blink. Extreme exhaustion. On another, I saw a street scene on our coast. And cars. It all looked so real, and yet I was awake and walking around. Not just minor hypnagogia, but sights and sounds. Years ago, I was on the bus when I was suddenly 'teleported' to a street not far from there. I manifested in the middle of a street and a car had to brake really hard to avoid hitting me. We drove past that location later.
Non-dream stuff; I was only aware of waking up at about 9, but I know I was awake before that. The dream I had in my memory as I woke up, I quickly forgot, by feeling the need to sit up and crack my neck and back, yet I somehow still remembered some earlier, non-lucid, dream fragments: Dream fragments: I remember being in a room, like at my parent's house, or my childhood home, but I can't say I remember the room in detail; it was one of the rooms at the back of the house and it was dark (but I didn't have the impression it was night). I was aware of a cat, black and white I think and there was a catfish or something... I distinctly remember the cat playing with the catfish and the catfish meowing; at first I was concerned for the fish somehow, and I remember turning my attention to something else and when I looked back again the catfish was gone, the implication being that the cat ate it. Suddenly it felt like the cat was aggressive and I remember trying to claw me; I think my instinctive responce was to smack it. In another fragment, I simply remember my two siblings being present. Possibly in a corridor leading to some stairs or with stairs intersecting it. Another fragment, I remember being aware of being back in my native country, with some sort of dream-generated friends or acquaintances in the dream and going up some dream-generated stairs, practically crawling up them, because in this dream my fear of heights seemed much greater. The stairs now remind me of something that Gaudi might have made, twisty, curly, yellow. I remember saying "I hate this country's stairs", in reference to the fact that my own native country has plenty of hilly cities and towns, with plenty of stairs. I kept climbing the stairs and eventually reached a tier where there were floating platforms. Some sort of children were here, as if they played here everyday and one said to me "if you want to get to the other side, I'm afraid jumping is the only way". I looked around for another option, hanging close to the floor due to my fear, and indeed there was no choice. The fall was a big one, I knew this. Someone from behind me, one of the dream friends said something like "we're 50 stories high, don't look down!" and I think I told them to shut up, that I knew, and I strongly resisted the urge to look down and simply hopped to the first small stone platform that was floating above this gap. The floating stone platforms were different shapes, some hexagons, some circles. I hopped to the next one, closest to a doorway on the opposite side of where I first arrived at this tier. I don't remember going through. In another fragment, perhaps related to the last, I remember something in space, with asteroids and a space base, but not much else, unfortunately. This was one of the dreams I forgot by sitting up. Notes: Last night, when I went outside to our yard I saw one of our neighbour's cats sitting on the wall, and it is black and white and has a bell; it scurries off when it sees us, even though the cat is the one choosing to come into our yard.In the platform jumping area, the abyss or gap or whatever was actually quite small, as I realised by hopping to each platform; the platforms felt decidedly steady despite their floating nature. The initial apprehensive nature of my fear likely made the gaps seem much wider at first, especially considering a fall implied death, and therefore, great pain in the last seconds.It is of note that I hate many platforming games, as usually the combat mechanics annoy me to great deal, such as Super Mario.Although my fear of heights varies greatly in waking life, it usually comes before I'm at the location, because of the anticipation of the situation; whereas in the dream the onset was only sudden once I was on the stairs.I'm fairly certain these fragments were actually linked by some transition, but I cannot remember it.As the stairs went up, there were buildings to either side, but on the right there was a gap between the stairs and the buildings, whereas on the left side they were adjoined. There were no doors at all at any point. In my native country the stairs would be less steep (possibly made steeper by fear) and there would be tiers and doors every so often.The fact that I and my siblings were present all in one room, these days, is not statistically likely. This should have made me question reality.The fact the catfish meowed should have made me RC, because I realised that it was odd, that catfish don't meow. Edit: added a very rough 3D scene I quickly made (10-15mins) of the stairs dream scene.
Updated 07-22-2018 at 01:27 AM by 95293
I was to prepare a game of 'The Werewolves of Miller's Hollow' for my mum and my brother, however what I did was set up a Pen&Paper-RPG: making up classes, a setting, even drawing a picture of the zeppelin-airship the story began in. My brother kept on coming in and watching what I was doing wich annoyed me since it took all the surprise away. At some point we were suddenly both standing in front of our school where evidently a festival of some sort was being held. Someone said something about a beaver that was somewhere, and my brother decided he wanted to search for it. He asked me if we should look left or right, it was like some form of a dialogue choice in video games. When I didn't reply for a while, a ball of moss crawled by wich my brother turned over and wich turned out to be a hedgehog. At this point I thought that the hedgehog was what we had been looking for all along. Upon closer inspection I realized that the hedgehogs' stings were all broken off apart from three, and that he seemed very frightened. Just then a man came along, broke off the poor things' last stings and threw them to some children who used them as toy swords. This made me furious, so I bolted after the guy and explained to him astonishingly calmly that a stingless hedgehog is practically dead. He apologized, but when he turned away I added, since I had realized his stench of beer, that the hedgehogs' situation can be compared to that of an unconcious drunk lying alone upon a street frequently used by criminals. I the went to another part of the street where I met a friend whom for some reason I threw on the ground. He then put on a headset and called three friends of his, asking wether they would play LoL with him. Two of them, whom I know only sporadically, said they would whereas the third, who is also a friend of mine, said he had no time for some reason related to his mother. NOTE: I am not a native speaker of english, and am almost convinced of the fact that what I meant on the hedgehog are in english not actually called 'stings'. I would be glad to be corrected here as anywhere in my posts.
Non-dream stuff: Woke up at 8, with the usual alarms and auto radio. Could remember a dream fragment but tried too hard to remember it so decided instead to set another alarm for 9:30 and try to sleep more. Woke up at 9:30 and remembered a dream but was fading a little. Non-lucid dream fragment, going backwards: 4: Starting from the end of the dream, I remember some frozen strips of pork. I know we were at some bigger and altered version of my partner's dad's house. I was going to cook them over a fire and I took a little strip off and ate it raw - very quickly I thought "Crap, you can't eat raw pork, what the hell am I doing? This is how you can get worms..." but then I also (conveniently...) remembered this was bacon, which in many cases can be eaten "raw" because of the process to make it. This is the last portion of the dream before I woke up. 3: I remember walking around the house before that, looking for my partner. It was strange, I was half-aware that this was a dream because I remember thinking that this was exactly like another time as I opened some doors and went through the crooked and narrow halls. I remember in the dream context there were some doors that unleashed swarms of spiders (dream memory someone had told me) but they were already open and my dream self knew which these were. 2: Before that, I can't remember if I was in a different place, but I think I was looking at a screen (but it feels like I wasn't) with my partner and there was a museum and a large limestone statue of someone like David the Thinker or Atlas, carrying the world. On the statue however, was an old friend of mine who I'd had a crush on in waking life; she was mostly naked apart from some (to me) weird leather laces around her limbs and pelvis; she was posing on or against the statue in a heroic pose, for a photo or something, as she was looking up and away, smiling. 1: And finally the earliest thing I can remember vaguely is that there was some sort of room. An office room maybe. Some notes: My old school friend should have been a good cue of a dream sign; not only was she someone that is simply not present in my life at all anymore, she was in a very odd situation. The leather lace stuff might have been because in waking life I remember she told me that she self-harmed. As a kid I didn't think too much about that, actually.The pose my old school friend was taking, was a behaviour accurate to her real personality, when I knew her anyway.In my partner's dad's house, I was aware of my partner being there, and do vaguely remember seeing him at some point.The thing with the bacon should have made me do a RC because from one moment to another I decided it was fine, when I was almost panicking for doing something so stupid initially.Waking life note: Must remember to, after doing something stupid, even if it's fine afterwards, do a RC.The spider swarm releasing doors, though I wasn't afraid of them, I was wary of them, even open. I felt like the spiders were moving around but I carried on with walking through the house.I remember there was a skylight in one of the corridors in the dream; in reality there is no skylight at all in that house.
Just got up, went into our computer room, kept the curtains closed and started my computer and wrote this. Two non-lucid dream sequences, mostly fragmented: First sequence: In the first dream I was in a "room" that was like a garden, it was a room in the sense that it was some sort of partition; I remember something like greek pillars covered in vines and grassy ground. In this room, there was "me", my partner from waking life, a friend of ours and a slim man in a suit; the three of us approached the man, as he was here to show us something and as we did or perhaps he was already doing it, he was levitating this large latticed purple orb, made of stone or gemstone, between his two hands, one hand above, one hand below; the orb floated up and down gently. I can't tell if it was day or night but everything looked somewhat "dark". At first my partner (who isn't really into any stuff like this) put his hand out toward the orb and closed his eyes and was silent; then our friend did and then I did. I could sense no special energy from the orb or the man: the orb was ordinary, regardless of any surreal properties. I stopped and walked away toward a door under a lowered roof, then I think our friend did too and I opened the door and there were two more doors to either side of a tiny partition and I opened another and went into a large room, like a conference room; there were a dozen men and women at the conference table, and they were waiting for us. I remember one of them asking what were we waiting for, why hadn't we all come in? Or something to this effect. I explained we wouldn't be a minute and I peeked out to see my partner still holding his hand at the orb and called him and he opened his eyes and walked away from the mysterious man, and the conference members were not keen on letting this man in. I remember my partner said that the orb felt like it had the energy of the universe or some such; which I interpreted as: it feels the exact same as any ordinary object, because it did to me. As we were all in now, apart from the orb man, one of the older men said "close the doors, lift the barriers" and some fake wall barriers emerged from some slots on the floor next to the doors, sealing the room. I remember this conference room had some windows, and had too much room even for just this single conference table. This all had a very Illuminati type feeling to me, even in the dream. Second sequence: I'm not sure where this sequence starts or if it carried over from the last one, but this one is temporally fragmented. I remember the last part first: I was at a waterpark with my partner and I remember thinking when I was talking to someone, I think a woman, that I always wanted to go to one. We were sort of leaning back against a wall of this single-story building, a large square-ish building as far as my dream self knew, we were waiting for something, I think more members of our group, which I think included my family. I remember as I waited, I was messing around, like lifting myself up by putting my hands against two lower walls and pushing myself up and I was also looking around the waterpark and outside of it. I saw some skyscrapers in the city. One was probably 30 stories, and then another, fancier, office building behind it was something between 60 or 70, I guessed. I pondered as I thought it was so strange that such a small difference in stories could make up for so much more height. The sky was blue and clear and it was certainly daytime. I think our group arrived and we walked around the square building and we were looking for a restaurant or something. We all went into this small one and as everyone was going in I could see on a digital interface (inside my head) that another nearby restaurant that was related to this one was much busier at the moment, and I walked up to one of the staff members that was headed for the loo and said to him like "want me to get some more people over from [indecipherable] restaurant?"; he looked at me approvingly but didn't answer and went in the bathroom; I turned away and walked out and headed for the other restaurant. This fragment ends here. Another fragment, before this last one, in dream time: I was standing with my partner in a garden at this waterpark; there were white painted wooden fences and it was a clear blue sky day, as it would still be later. My dream self knew this garden was part of an accommodation we were staying in, part of the park's premises. I remember hearing a woman's voice, she was praying, loudly, and I commented to my partner "surely she can keep her voice down a little?"; he shrugged and looked in the distance, resting his arms on this wooden fence. Her praying went on for some time, and I thought about how I had never prayed loudly in my life except when asked to, and even then, barely so. And yet this woman was praying to be heard by all, without concern of being judged or criticised for doing so. I remember my dream self knew there sprinklers in the gardens but they had not yet been on, though the grass looked perfectly lush and perfectly trimmed. Can't recall more fragments. Notes: I have had curiosity about going to waterparks, but I have certainly never had the open desire of "always wanting to go to one", so this could have been a thought I could have realised was odd. Both dreams, the whole places were dream-generated, in their entirety. The only "exception" being that the accommodation and its garden in the last fragment very closely resembled the type of thing my family used to go to holiday for, when I was a kid. In the dream I could clearly hear the woman's prayers but I had forgotten all of it by the time I woke up. It felt important to my dream self to remember what she was praying. In the first dream, the "Illuminati" conference was probably partly based off the imagined world from the first Deus Ex Machina games, as that is one of the most prominent visual culture references I have for the subject. I do not know why my dream self, which was like "me", was part of it. And if there were a dozen people in the room, with the 3 of us walking into the room, that would make 15 - in the game's world it is implied there are 12 members only. The floating purple orb really had no special feel to it; it felt more mechanical and part of nature than anything else, as I truly did not feel any special energy from it. The man was peculiar for mostly just standing there, firmly, in what looked like a tophat and an old style suit, simply "presenting" the orb. Perhaps he and the orb were merely part of the garden, in the same way as the grass and vines. Tip/Memory Note: I remember much less on getting up than what I wrote now, but because of the way memory works it's easier to remember things like a dream in sequence, so as you start from the beginning or end it becomes easier to recall more of the memorable parts if you think it out and through. This is also true for your waking life memories: if you are in a room and don't remember the recent past, you go backwards in your memory of living the last moments. If you pay enough attention through most of the day, you can recall an entire day this way, sometimes more.
Night of July 18, 2018. Wednesday. For this page, I will review, with more clarity, some of the potential attributes of the dream state. The utilization of these pages as a virtual course or study guide in developing a greater clarity of mind is possible for some, but likely not for all. Do not be tricked into believing the following factors of the dream state are directly related to each other. One can define “vividness” as to how aware the dream self (subconscious self) is. One can define “lucidness” as to how aware the conscious self (waking self identity) is. One can define “modulatory factor” as to what extent the subconscious self can shape or control the ongoing dream or the dream state itself whether or not it is aware it is dreaming. One can define “realism” as to how realistic the dream is in contrast to being surreal and unlike waking life factors. One can define “cohesiveness” by how the dream progresses. Remember though, that the subconscious self lacks a viable sense of time and linearity (temporality). Additionally, the types of vestibular system correlation are a factor if one wants to establish and mediate or modulate virtual physicality. As described before, the challenge is to balance the illusion of physicality with the illusion of space (as well as directional orientation). In many dreams in childhood, I lucidly and non-lucidly became incorporeal. In some dreams, invisibility was my choice, while still maintaining virtual physicality. Take a look at the list that includes vividness, lucidness, modulatory factor, realism, and cohesiveness. Try to come to terms with the truth by practicing pairs of reasoning in contrast to each other, all of which are inherently true. For example, dreams may be lucid without the factor of control. There are vivid dreams that are not realistic. You can sustain and control dreams without lucidity. There are visually realistic dreams that do not have viable temporality. The list goes on. Such variation explains the nature of emerging consciousness simulacrums. You can perceive illusory physicality as problematic or project that anticipation into a simulacrum or avatar. Again, the most common potential for this is flying or falling. Walking is inherently more difficult when the focus is present. In the highest levels of lucidity, the feeling of walking is more thrilling than flying. That is because the illusion of weight and momentum is so well-defined (as well as augmented tangibility). Flying dreams sometimes have this, but it is more defined when closer to the conscious self identity as it exists in waking life. Before I close this page, I will address a couple of habitual types of focus and projection regarding simulacrums of the emerging consciousness. Again, the vestibular system correlation is a factor, which can lead to flying, falling, rising, hovering, and many other situations. Another obvious factor is to what extent RAS is active and to what purpose. (For example, environmental noise, ultradian rhythm, biological need, and so on.) To what extent; subliminal, liminal, or lucid, is the subconscious self aware of being asleep in bed? Readability score: 48
Not dream: I woke up earlier than usual, woken up by our friend staying over and remember dreaming something, but in no detail, and soon fell asleep again. Woke up at the normal time and stayed in bed for 45 minutes, seeing whether I'd sleep more and dream again or not. I didn't but remembered some dream fragments and got up. I knotted two of my fingers as I've seen a friend do, to remember the fragments and my intention as I go through doorways in the house, as I first go downstairs to make tea and then come back up to write my fragments as follow: Fragment 1 (non-lucid): I was playing a special player vs player mode in a game I'd been playing recently in waking life, where I'd throw bombs at other players and vice versa, with the objective of making each other fall off the platforms until only one of us was left. What was different from the real game was that I was able to use my character's swords as well in this game mode. Fragment 2 (non-lucid): I remember talking to old friends and they were inviting me over to their estate across the river; in the dream I had a memory of what the estate was like, but I felt like something was off, as I also didn't remember this estate actually being so big. How could I remember and not remember at the same time? The "memory" was vivid, so I think that in the dream it's more like I was actually at the estate and that's what made me question it a bit. Notes: In waking life, there is a phenomenon that when you go through a doorway, your mind forgets current thoughts and changes how it thinks. I think I remember reading that it is believed this had to do with contextual adaptation, before humans made so many artificial thresholds themselves, such as going from the tundra to the plains and to the desert and so on. Interestingly in dreams, doorways and thresholds in general can have very literal scene changes beyond them. For me, anyway, they do.Keeping fingers knotted like this causes a good deal of pain, especially since my joints are hypermobile, but focusing on this lets me focus on the intention I set when I started doing it, even when I go through thresholds, as I've observed my friend do. I don't know the mechanic behind this, but it just seems to work.The friends from my second fragment are like extended family, but I rarely see them anymore, and in fact, in waking life it is impossible for me to casually see or hear about them, because I no longer live in the same country, so in my dream I was back in my native country, and should have realised this to be unusual.
Night of July 17, 2018. Tuesday. In continuing from page one, in simplifying the context and detail of simulacrum maintenance, I will focus on the attributes of the emerging consciousness in various circumstances. How does one know how to mediate or modulate the dynamics of vestibular system correlation? It is a challenge. Orientation is erroneous and illusory in dreams for a few reasons. A dreamer standing or walking while his physical body is asleep in bed is only one reason. Oneironauts dismiss the notion of interpretation. It comes from a mindset that does not understand what the dream state is. Several key factors must be understood and utilized. I will again make a note of a few here. Lucidity, vividness, and dream control are all different factors of the dream state. If someone claims that in becoming lucid he or she can then control the dream state, he or she is propagating a common misconception. (This is especially true with lucid dreamers who show no comprehension of the dream state.) All it takes to control dreams is understanding dream state autosymbolism. It does not require the conscious self identity, as the preconscious link to the unconscious mind supplies the subconscious self with the essence of comprehension without the direct awareness it is dreaming. I believe that an intelligent person can learn to be more familiar with their reticular activating system and how it works. Dream state symbolism (autosymbolism or simultaneous symbolism, of which is concurrent with the sleeping, dreaming, and waking transitions as well as a result of thoughts rendered in REM sleep) cannot correlate to waking life symbolism. Knowing this is only the beginning in building a viable knowledge of the dream state. Literalisms, from the self or the interconsciousness, create an ambiguous enigma. There is no way to resolve this as waking life thoughts sometimes have the same ambiguity. Threads of prescience resonate with the autosymbolism of the dream state. Utilizing facts that you can validate in your own time, you have an exponential advantage over typical mindsets that have a passing interest in dreams. These mindsets can be seen on the Internet, typically exchanging their skewed jargon, often borrowing it from invalid sources and playing games based on a misconception. In addition to understanding that lucidity, vividness, and control of the dream state are not dependent on each other, one needs to understand that the subconscious self is not the conscious self. The preconscious is not the conscious self either. The preconscious and its avatars serve to build metaphorical bridges from the illusory subconscious self to the conscious self, sometimes by creating conflict scenarios to force the dreamer to awaken. The interconsciousness establishes links to the transpersonal; that which exists without the dreamer. The mystery I have often pondered is why people create devils to chase them. Reticular activating system modulation creates unpleasant scenarios for some people far more than others. It should only come into play either when there is a health issue or a genuine concern for the immediate environment’s status. Prescience may also be a factor (even though many people do not believe in it so thus ignore it). It is otherwise normal to maintain a subliminal, liminal, or lucid sense of vulnerability while sleeping. That is how dreams evolved in the first place. Consider that a person is usually undressed while asleep in bed. It is, of course, a reason for having dreams of being undressed in public. Consider that there are people who believe that being undressed in the dream state has a so-called interpretation. One could argue that it is a bizarre trait to exhibit such an extreme example of empty-headedness. For me, such a situation is moot, as I am always subliminally, liminally, or lucidly aware of being in the dream state. It is biology. Additionally, experience and understanding manifest the virtuous circle effect, especially after years of developing clarity of mind. Readability score: 51.
Night of July 16, 2018. Monday. The emerging consciousness factor is one of several factors in the establishment and utilization of lucid and non-lucid dream control. This series will briefly address dreams based on this factor. Dreams originally evolved out of a need to establish a degree of awareness while sleeping, to determine concurrent environment threats or concerns. From here, additional processes came in, with the reticular formation being a part of the process, two key factors being hunting and evading. Abstract thought and autosymbolism began to develop. Autosymbolism developed from the biologically diagnostic stages of dreaming and waking. Religious fanaticism transmuted predator forms into the delusional fixation on so-called devils and demons. In modern times, such “demons” still have the attributes of animals but are often transmuted into domesticated animals (such as goats and bulls), which is anomalous. Awareness of the subconscious self, through which in non-lucidity has no intelligence, temporality, viable memory, or even inherent tangibility became a dominating factor, which came about from the augmented self-awareness of more developed individuals. In modern times, the majority of people do not clearly remember their dreams, and even when they do, lack any understanding of them. In contrast, people like me are not only able to recall their dreams but retain the memories of them indefinitely as well as typically understand their meanings as they are occurring, with additional hypnopompic revelation also being a common factor. In non-lucidity, the subconscious self is isolated. It does not have a viable link to either the unconscious mind or the conscious self identity as in waking life or as in lucid dreaming. However, because of the virtuous circle effect in working with and understanding my dreams from early childhood, non-lucid dream control is a factor of importance. I often have more control over my non-lucid dreams than many others have in lucid dreams. My knowledge of autosymbolism is one of the reasons for this. Remember that autosymbolism is not symbolism in the conventional sense. Many people mistakenly believe and propagate that dreams contain waking life symbolism, which is typically not even possible. In fact, many so-called interpreters fuse literalisms into dream content and pretend they have interpreted something that is often a self-evident factor. In non-lucidly attempting to establish my link to the emerging consciousness, virtually infinite possibilities arise. The catalyst is the vestibular system correlation of the waking process. It varies. The focus may center on physicality or the level of discernment of the space around the illusory physicality. The mode of the dream self and its fictitious body varies from dream to dream. Many people like to pretend that the dream self’s illusory body is like their physical body. It is a bizarre fallacy of which most people never attempt to resolve. A challenge of both lucid and non-lucid mediation and modulation of the dream state involves vestibular system dynamics. It is easier for me to fly than walk in dreams. Flying is natural and automatic. So is falling. A dreamer should not pretend that vestibular system correlation has an association with waking life other than biologically. For example, the first falling start of each sleep cycle is more defined, vivid, and intense when I had walked more in real life. Pretending that muscular literalisms are “symbolic” is a game of the unintelligent. It is chaff of the mindless and purposeless content of so-called dream dictionaries and the woo of so-called interpreters. In these entries, I will focus on the vestibular system correlation of type two. They will reflect upon the mediation and modulation of the physicality of emerging consciousness. Type one nuances occur in some examples. This entry has been scanned, reformatted, and corrected by AI. It requires at least a 160 IQ to comprehend. Public readability is only 38. I did not intend this. It is difficult for me to write at a level below a 160 IQ for this type of content. I will try to make other entries in this set clearer.
Fell asleep at: 1:00 AM Woke up at: 12:00 PM Dream 106: I wake up in the bed of what is an exact replica of my parents' bedroom-- nighttime-- when a blonde woman walks up to me and tosses some terms of affection my way. I get confused for a second,"Wait, I don't have a wife. Do I? Wasn't I just?..." I seriously start questioning my reality at this point. I start thinking to myself,"Was everything that happened to me before just a dream? Did I really forget I have a wife? Husband of the year I guess..." I walk around the living room, dazed. It's nighttime so I can't really make out any specifics, but I can tell it was close to Christmas seeing as we set up a tree in the living room. My daughter, a black-haired teenager it looks like, tries talking to me. She is wearing a black tank top with red writing. Then it jump-cuts to my high school years. I'm at a high school alongside some of my friends and a younger version of my DC wife (At that point my DC girlfriend). I take a look around. Orange and silver are the two primary colors, as with my high school, but things looked marginally different. There were gates everywhere (None of which were higher than 4-5 feet by the way) and everyone was packed together like a can of sardines. A really odd design for a school. We have received word about an unknown zombie-like virus that is spreading throughout the country, getting worse and worse as the days go on, but nobody seems to be understanding what's going on. My girlfriend, my friends, and I all decide to skip class and wait near the entrance of the school just in case something decides to kick off. I sit next to my girlfriend with many of the same facial features as before, looking like a young version of Elena Fisher of Uncharted fame. I try putting my hand on her arm, but I notice her pulling her arm away so I leave it at that. Stressful times I suppose. One of my friends decides to have some fun, and is playing a video game on his phone alongside the guy next to him. The volume on their phone is absurdly loud, and I start getting concerned that one of the staff may hear it and separate our group. Nothing of the sort happened though, except I spot a misty, erratic shadow in the distance. All of us know exactly what it is. In an instant we all storm towards the exit, but it's too late. School security must have seen it too, seeing as there is a smorgasbord of them lining the entrances. Kids are hurriedly cramming themselves into buses, and we also decide it's our best course of action. I get pushed towards the back by a flood of 9th graders, but I can still see my friends in the bus. My girlfriend is sitting right in front of me. Somewhere along the way we manage to get off the bus and tour an abandoned neighborhood. The four of us are scavenging for just about everything: food, water, medicine, Band-Aids, clothing, weaponry (Kitchen knives mostly) and whatever else we feel is necessary. The "camera" then pans upwards towards the sky, as if it were the end of the episode or something. I think the main thing that got to me in this dream was the 'reality' of it all. Like, sure, I don't have a wife and a daughter in the real world, but it's the details that got to me. The first genuine crush I had was with a blonde girl, very similar in complexion to the DC wife in the dream. I did end up spending a lot of time with her, so a bond definitely was brewing (At least my perspective). I myself have jet black hair, so having a daughter that has the same color hair I have wouldn't be too far off. And with me owning the house my parents have now? Pretty much all of my siblings have moved out in some form or another, so that just speaks for itself. I gotta say, the thought that all my years of life were completely untrue and waking up into a completely new one kinda broke me on the inside.
Blue Opossum’s Dream Canon Page 3 Afternoon of July 9, 2018. Monday. Henceforth, these pages are to be the sole resource for resolving any potential for erroneous or ambiguous conclusions regarding any content posted in any of my previous entries since 2004. In this entry, I will start to go into more detail about the nature of both lucid and non-lucid dream control. I will look at the most dominating factors of going in and out of the dream state, including the most common (for me) forms of autosymbolism and literalism while deliberately shifting levels of awareness. These details will not yet be in any precise order. Some of the most common forms of both non-lucid and lucid dream control relate to the following: Jumping from a cliff or other high location in semi-lucidity has always produced extraordinary results for me. This augments and sustains vestibular system correlation. Physicality is amplified as well, including the sense of weight and momentum and blissful sustained effortless flight. Mentally creating a difficult door to open, usually an old wooden door, and then opening it, or as of late, rapidly flying and phasing through a large locked steel vault door to outside. This was pure bliss and happiness, and occurred in the state of dream self omnipresence (BEING the dream state itself rather than just being “in” it). In some dreams, I pull aside an entire wall as if it was a sliding door. This is very effective for me as well and greatly sustains and vivifies the dream state, where I am then able to summon more denizens as well. Using a staircase to go either up or down produces mixed results. The direction of going up or down is more about the level and extent of thinking skills. Each greatly augments the dream state. However, going down a flight of steps augments the summoning factor, where denizens automatically serve me without question, whereas going up a staircase also augments and vivifies the dream state, though is more about being more focused on material awareness, and with dream characters being more of their own essence. Coalescence. Sometimes I seek denizens out and coalesce (typically near a train station or lake in a dense forest). Other times, in blissful states, they leap into me as if I were an anthropomorphic swimming pool. These are human forms only, which appear as pale blue silhouettes. In normal dreams, such avatars often coalesce with me with a mutual hug. Preconscious avatar traits often include celebrity status, unfamiliar status (unknown person), a dancer, a detective or secret agent, and a knowledge of flight, sometimes angelic or with a divine essence. (These forms of avatars go all the way back to earliest memory and are always part of the same types of dream components, even usually in the same order.) The dancing factor is obviously related to fluidity of movement as associated with vestibular system correlation as analogous to a form of flight and augmented control of physicality and “balance” in liminal space. When the avatar is not personified, it often has feline characteristics, sometimes as an actual domestic cat. In other cases, the factor, when transitioning by way of the interconsciousness, is rendered as a very realistic bird that seems the most likely and direct autosymbolism of transpersonal communication, typically an exotic bird. The most vivid form is a resplendent quetzal or in some cases, a hummingbird. Birds also represent a specific level of vestibular system correlation, especially as they fly with little effort. In other cases, the preconscious avatar rapidly shifts within hundreds of different identities in a few minutes. This always triggers a sustained dream state and enhanced lucidity. In one dream, I was sitting on Zsuzsanna’s left (on our couch) which is how we rarely sit in waking life. Zsuzsanna was becoming different avatars, easily more than one per second. I sat there watching and realized I was in the dream state to my amusement, which automatically vivified the scenario. I created a difficult door to open (in this case, a rendering of our front door), opened it, and saw a long series of small stages on each side of the street. Birds were frozen as silhouettes in midair (which is another method of sustaining and vivifying the dream state). Each stage had a denizen devoted to my existence and focus. In this dream canon, I will give more and more past examples with actual dream content, trying to be as clear and direct as possible. I will also go into more detail about how dream state symbolism (autosymbolism) has nothing at all to do with waking life symbolism or the so-called subconscious as most “interpreters” (including “experts” and “professionals”) pretend. This might prove to be valuable, as I see more and more people turning to superstitious rubbish and common misconceptions. I am thinking of even including lists of self-evident questions so that some people might be able to decide or learn it for themselves. This entry is subject to change only for purposes of clarification. If any content reads as unclear or is perceived as ambiguous, contact me by way of messaging on one of the following sites (order of preference): Twitter (@BlueOpossum), Tumblr (Blue Opossum’s Dream Journal), or my Facebook account via the dream journal website profile. Thank you for your time and respect. This ends Blue Opossum’s Dream Canon Page 3.
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